Andrew Q Gordon

Excuse me but what the hell is this doing in Q-topolis? Why is it locked and why is it pinned to the top of my forum?

First tell Wyatt to get his own account so he can pad my numbers Okay, A] Who said he was good looking? Only Jason. [Not that only Jason found him hot, just he's the only one in the story who said he was hot stuff.] If you recall Peter never felt he was that attractive, so beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I'm kinda shocked you agreed with him on this - you must be sucking up Trevor B] This too was explained in depth, so I'm a tad perplexed at how you could wonder this as well First his family never really had much money so he has a chip on his shoulder about making sure he carries his own weight. Then there was his asshole ex who made him feel like shit because he didn't have much money which only reinforced his feeling of being unable to be an equal with Jason monetarily.

Another day of being right up to the edge to post my selection, but this is a twofer. Oh Holy Night - by Eric Cartman

HRMPH!!!

Pretty much it's still the same, but then I didn't think it was that dirty. It, like all circles in DC is federal property. The US Park Police have jurisdiction and the department of the interior maintains it - in theory. Woo Hoo DC. SOOOO When now? I'd say late no sooner than late April - if you do it during cherry blossom season you won't get rooms. and before July 4th - too hot after that to be enjoyable. I'd say early June would be ideal, colleges will be out and it - again in theory - won't be too hot.

Lugh!!!! I'm so thrilled you've joined the: Cia For Queen of Cliffhangers Bandwagon. You've made my day!!!

Happy Birthday C-man - now give us all a birthday gift and finish book two

When I started Purpose, I was trying to get a feel for how would someone like will, basically a good, decent person, cope with being forced to kill over and over without turning into something worse than those he killed. [now we could debate if being a vigilante isn't worse, but you know what I mean, hopefully ] Thanks again for reading.

Thanks, George, the side trips were meant to back fill parts that I couldn't really get out in the story without really detouring so it's good they helped

Eeek, being compared to those writers makes mine look so amateurish, . Thanks for the reading Bill, glad you enjouyed it.

Uff, almost missed it again sorry. I was singing this the other day to Baby Q as we were walking around the mall looking for a gift for her daddy - [no I was not shopping for myself ]

How can you vote to kill yourself? I mean, why not just kill yourself instead of asking us to do it for you VOTE: Krista - hey she voted to kill me, I'm returning the favor.

When not changing diapers etc, I can get out a few hundred words at a clip fairly easily, it's stringing them all together in a meaningful way that makes it harder. Glad to see you enjoyed it. Hopefully the 'more' will be sooner than later

Nah. if given the time to concentrate, I could bang this out in a bout a year or so, but the quality might not be the best, so give me 3 years

First: Ivan - welcome Second: Ignore the dark one Nephylim - okay just kidding. She gave you some good advice - thought I would ignore the whole panic thing. My suggestion is get yourself a beta reader -someone who will be honest with you, who understands the structure of how to write a novel, including plot, sub plots, character developments etc. Some one who is not going to be afraid to say - this part isn't going to work and here's why. Editor is very important too. One question I have is are you looking to post it on line or are you trying to get published? I ask because they are two very different things. Many of the very good stories here would have trouble in the rigid world of publishing because they violate too many 'rules'. If you are just trying to write for because it makes you feel good, then you can pretty much do as you please, write as you see/feel it. But if your goal is to be a published author - then buy a few books on writing, read what they have to say about structure and what not and then - again as Nephy said - practice by writing a lot and soliciting feed back. There are two very important elements here - one is vision and the other is execution. Vision is the plot, basics, concepts etc. If it's just a rehash of a common theme filled with lots of cliches i.e. nerdy, beaten down boy falls for hot super popular jock and they fall madly in love and everything works out and they live happily ever after, then it's probably not going to do so well. The plot needs to be interesting and can't be too predictible. The execution comes down to how well you develop your characters, do they feel alive to the reader, does the reader care, can the reader relate, do they have distinct personalities, do they remain in character. These are all elements that give depth to your story. Okay, I've said more than enough. If you have more questions ask them in the Writer Corner Forum for best results. Andy

Bill, If this is indeed your swan song, I'm saddened by the news. Hopefully you'll rekindle your fire some day and feel the need to write again and then share with everyone else. I fear I am more in the camp with Krista - please don't faint dear, you know I love you. I've gotten some angry public criticism, some of which was right on the money - some I ignored. But the point is - if you put your work out there AND ask for feed back, and almost everyone does ask for the feed back, you have to expect it won't all be great. I think - again agreeing with Kirsta - that bitching is not welcome at all, either in public or in a PM, but telling people you're characters are flat, or you're head hoping, or your confusing us because - and explaining why - this is not negative feed back as much as constructive criticism. Yes this is a free site where no one gets paid to share, but it would be silly to say - 'Positive Reviews only, I don't want to hear anything critical, even if it's right.' That's kind of like the Emperor Has No Clothes. The vast, vast majority of writers here. came to not only share but to improve. I could name a half dozen authors easily whose work HAS gotten markedly better over the short time I've been here. In fact I was told this in a review left for me by someone I rather like. My main point is that if all one should do is say positive things in reviews and only give the critical one in private - how does that help the community at large? If someone comes on the site, reads a story rife with novel writing no - nos and all they see is, 'This is great,' 'you're so talented,' 'this is the best thing since sliced bread,' when they think the story is trite, banal, needs work, seriously needs an editor, etc, what are the odds said author would stick around? But I think you last point is well taken - anything that quenches the fire of young and new writers is to be discouraged. The trick I suppose is finding in advance which authors truly want to learn and those who give lip service to it and only want to here platitudes and praise. If you have indeed posted your last story, then I would like to say thank you and may good fortune smile on you with whatever is next for you. Andy

Steve, You have it backwards - must be a Canadian thing. It was I who approached CJ about helping me give this award to SHE who rightfully deserves it. CJ, being the magnanimous sort that he is, graciously agreed to help. Go back and look, before I ever spoke to CJ - and you can pull records for this - I nominated Cia for Queen of Cliffs last year. I was told - by non-other than the Future Queen herself - that I would fail, that CJ was a lock to win. Despite my best efforts, CJ did in fact win last year and CIa came in second. All I'm doing is making good on my promise to Cia last spring that I was going to nominate and campaign heavily for her to win this prestigious award. Bad mouthing poor CJ - who, as I've already stated, has graciously agreed to ask his fans to vote for the truly deserving Cia - is not very nice or Canadian of you. So, please reconsider and come over to the right side and be a card carrying member of the Cia fan club. Remember: Vote early. Vote often. Vote Cia, Queen of Cliffhangers.

Hated it! Just kidding, you know I'd never really say that if I meant it. Anyway, this was cute, sweet, nice - perfect actually. Nothing too deep, but deep enough. Kinda breaks all the stereotypes you think of when you think college men, I give it a new and improved

Something a little different:

Well let's not flood the field, there is already a huge push underway to re-crown King CJames, if we put forth more than one candidate it will split the opposition. I say it's Cia, after all she ALMOST won last time, she came in second, time to improve on last years results, no? Well said JC, - down with King CJames, Long live Queen Cia!!!!

When I wrote this, it was supposed to be part of a very long Legends anthology entry. That one was getting way too long and still not nearing a conclusion so I scraped the idea of using it for Legends. The story however has enormous appeal to me. The idea was the story begins with Telg - Fifth Order Dlgen - finding Harlin being beaten by the boys in his village as he is leaving after being cast out by his parents. As hinted, he adopts Harlin and that is where the 'real' story begins. Stefren is a Prince of Gillium an ancient Kingdom, founded on the ruins of an even older civilization that vanished millennium ago. He arrives at Telg's school and delivers a request from the King of Gillium for Telg to come 'home' The school is a training academy run by Telg to train warriors and ultimately to find and train Harlin for his role in the coming conflict. Of course Telg didn't know it would be Harlin when he founded the school. Fenzu is like Sensei - teacher, head of the school. Harlin and Stefren have this dance - so to speak - around each other, until it culminates in the events in A Cold Rain. A Dlgen is a special, gifted warrior, 'Touched by the Twins'. The Twins are the remaining Gods of the world and the Dlgen were created to help protect the world. They belong to no one kingdom, answering only to the Twins Haskes are thin, cloth like armor. They feel like silk but are nearly impenetrable. Only someone touched by the Twins can wear one. The colors correspond to the Rank or proficiency of the Dlgen and change automatically over time as the Dlgen's rank, skill and powers evolve. Telg is the only Fifth order and one of only a few to ever achieve that rank. He is already a legend and he hasn't really begun to do what he is destine to do. The basic plot is that long ago the people of this world achieved great power through magic, but they were divided between two factions, with one delving into dark arts that corrupted them. [so original I know] In the end, both sides killed themselves, leaving only a very few survivors to rebuild the world. The war consumed the Gods who chose sides, leaving only the Twins to guard the world. A survivor of the side that 'won' the side of 'good' has always lived among the world, hidden yet among them. He/she was to guard against a return of the dark spirits. News comes that the a dark warlord has risen and the Dlgen believe it is a dark spirit trying to enter the world. Stefren has a major role to play in the defense of the world - which is why Telg needed Harlin to understand how important it was to guard him, with his life if necessary. My idea is to divide this up in to 6 parts. Each called Dlgen of the "fill in the blank" Order; so Dlgen of the 1st, Dlgen of the 2nd, etc. The last part/book would be called Dlgen something, but I'm not certain how to name it yet. The course of the story will take Harlin and Stefren on a journey to realize what Stefren's role is in the coming war. Of course there would be events along the way are more than just these two, but it will all come from Harlin's first person POV. Whew, there you go. So if you haven't read A Cold Rain, please go do so and then let me know what you think. If you have read it, let me know if the above makes any kind of sense. Andy

Wait - how did I end up in that list? Please, like last year, the only truly deserving candidate is . . . drum roll please . . . . Cia, Queen of Cliffs. This year we must reverse the travesty that resulted in CJ winning an award he did NOT deserve. Vote Cia - she's the best!!!!

Others have commented on the science of this so I'll let smarter folks than I do justice to what was truly fascinating. I was struck by the detail you paid to the small things that you'd never think about when you think space travel - the time lost, the small quarters - nothing like star trek at all eh? the fact they'd never see their kids or other family again, the inability to shower or go potty - [sorry I have a new born we're learning to speak all over again] I know the end wasn't mean to be sad, but for me it was terribly so. Never to see your family again - especially my child - would tear me apart -even if my husband and I were still together. So despite the hopefulness of the ending it was still saddening as well. Great job with this.

Geez, I haven't seen such a comedy of . . . of . . . well since The Bird Cage - Armand and Starina Gaston and Chord, complete with crazy families and all. It Was - err - sorry that's your line - well it was different for you. One star of Chord, One Star for Gaston - One for each family and one for the chick who couldn't get the gay boy to put it in her. 1,2,5 - three sire - err sorry 3,4,5 stars. And no I'm not drunk.

Wait, someone else thinks Cia should be the Evil Queen/King of Cliffs too? CJ you're my new hero - I tried last year, but no one agreed. So - since Steve did it, how about I do it too - **CIA FOR QUEEN OF CLIFFS** I'm going to sign all my post like that from now on. Sorry CJ, isn't has as evil as Cia.