Thomas Haworth

Knowing what will happen at the convention later on, I think we should watch Levi -- I expect him to try to poison Dorian when Dorian becomes Alpha.

Call me suspicious, but what does Gustav know about the situation? Recall that he is a member of Stratos, the elite security. Would he go into a situation without knowing all the ins and outs of it? Is he all that he seems? Who exactly is he working for?

Can Alpha Easton have his father removed from the pride? Just wondering.

Enjoy is not the word I would use, but I want to see more of this story. In the character of Chase you have shown clinical depression very well indeed.

This is an interesting story on an issue few have thought about. I want to compliment the author on the use of pronouns. Unfortunately, the English language as currently used makes it difficult to talk about genders other than male and female. Over time, I expect that the singular 'they' will become part of the language. Note that the German formal second-person pronoun 'Sie' is actually the third person plural pronoun. I expect the process to take several years, but I am confident that languages can adapt to the needs of the speakers.

I think it also possible that the grandfather is in cahoots with Ezra -- it would explain how Ezra knew about the court case.

Hmm. Am I the only reader who suspects that someone in the council is in contact with a different off-worlder?

Nicely written -- The immediacy of the fear makes for a gripping beginning. I look forward to more.

Wow. This is quite a chapter in their lives. I don't usually comment about writing, as usually, if I notice the writing, I am not engaged in the story enough to keep my interest. In this chapter, I did not notice anything other than the story and the character interactions. That said, I can look back and say some things about this story that may interest you as an author. I found the characters' interactions to be natural and believable: I did not notice anything jarring or anything that pulled me out of the story. Good work!

How did Damian know that Ryan and Jasper were in Ryan's room? I do not think it is unreasonable to put Chris in the scenario.

I would guess the insider is Dax. Who trained him at the palace?

Sadly, this sort of abuse is life for an inordinately large number of people. Brady needs to think about one parallel: Brady not talking to Ember is analogous to Linda not telling Brady. Both were a mistake.

The question I have is, is Sylvia in on the abduction? She seems awfully anxious to destroy any evidence that is there.