C James

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, Shadowgod did leave us with a bit of a cliffhanger there, didn't he? Well, he's evil that way, so I 'spose it's to be expected. And have you ever tried typing with hooves? It ain't easy, I tell ya!!

Ahh, thanks! And BTW, would anyone know, from the Perm books, why Fire lizards died out? Thanks Dan! I didn't catch that, but it has been forever since I've read one of the Pern books. For me, the clue that there was something amiss was the unusual motion of said star as it approached being bracketed. BTW, I assume that it is only bracketed at a certain time of day? I think it would have to be, unless it was crossing a polar axis. That would fit with the Dragons noticing it first, when it finally lined up during the night. Looking forward to the next chapter, and I've very glad that you found your jump drive.

Howdy, Goat-buddy! Yes indeed, the camping trip perhaps wasn't quite the relaxing and romantic hideaway that the guys were anticipating, but I did promise a camping trip that would sizzle... And true, Eric can't be that bad, or he would have done far worse. And he does have that admirable industrious quality going for him. Ok, will do.. Actually, I've already switched to "poor, misperceived Eric". I'm not familiar with using a modern cell-phone, because I haven't had one in a few years. The bullet couldn't be easily traced. Ammo is not registered or numbered, either for civilian or police use. Same with the guns; Arizona does not have gun registration for civilians for any type of gun, and for government issue guns only the serial numbers are recorded. What they could do, though, is a ballistics and barrel-markings match if they got their hands on both the gun and the bullet. You can't fault a guy for being protective of his business, quite right.

[ :king: Happy Birthday, Dio!! :king:

Fund Raiser is an excelent short read, and uses fiction to highlight a very real issue and organization. One underlying theme that struck me was that out of a needless tragedy, some good came. I hope that result is not limited to fiction. I'm going to add part of the credits here, as this is a real issue, and a real campaign. This story is dedicated to the memory of Jodie Gater and Stephanie Gestier. Yellow Ribbon Australia (http://www.yellowribbon.org.au) is a programme designed by young people, for the benefit of young people. It is a help seeking/peer support programme, with a simple aim: To create an environment which encourages and empowers young people to ask for help in a time of need. It further aims to educate the community to know how to respond to the needs of young people. Since its introduction, Yellow Ribbon has positively affected the lives and help seeking abilities of thousands of teenagers around the world. Yellow Ribbon Australia and Sara Lee are working together to inform the Australian community that "ITS OK TO USE THE FOUR LETTER WORD

Great chapter! I think my absolute favorite line was:

Sorry, but not quite! And why isn't this a good place for my "Poor, misunderstood Eric" statement? Well, I guess that wasn't working too well, so I'm turning over a new leaf: He's now "Poor, lovable, misperceived Eric." ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And lube? I absolutely guarantee that the word "lube" will be appearing in the next chapter (24). BTW, CHAPTER 23 has just been POSTED.

Or hiding from the trees, but that would be the author.. I liked the portrayal of Steph on his first journey, and to me this chapter was a "coming of age" chapter; Driver's liscences and a first journey. Very well done! Quite agreed, ConnEr, we goats gotta stick together! Frosty does say mean things about Goats... Revenge must be taken! Heh, I liked the travelogue; I've never been to Montreal so I'm looking forward to "seeing" it through Ben and Steph's eyes.

Good point! In this case, my original inclusion was not only chunky and useless, but confusing, so I'm very, very glad that I too my anonymous beta reader (shdowgod's) advice on the matter. The dart would have flashed when it hit, not during flight, but I agree; it would have been a detraction to include it. Were I writing in third-person I might have tried it as a background detail, but in first it would have been horrible. Less than 12 hours, now. :-) And you are quite right; unlike shadowgod, who is notorious for his cliffhangers, my characters are merely on top of a cliff being cooked to death, so I wouldn't call it a cliffhanger. Thanks! Nope, I really did want to know how people felt. I'm a bit of a detail nut, so there was a bit of a desire to include things like that. It is fortunate that I reign in this tendency, otherwise you would have had a several-chapter-long detailed recount of exactly how Rob and Joe removed the dent in Steve's bumper after he rammed Veronica's mailbox. As for Eric, would this be a good place for me to make my "Poor, misunderstood Eric" defense? Emoe!!! No fair posting my unedited text! (OK< now y'all know what my typing looks like, and what Emoe has to deal with... It ain't easy to type with hooves!)

Errrmmmm, I'm suspicious... I note your use of the work player and so far. Are you up to something sneaky???

I'm wondering what will happen regarding the threadfall, too. Sounds like it will come in unexpected ways. My curiosity was tweaked by the playing cards, which were described in detail. Are they significant from one of the Pern books? As for J'Shon, I'm betting that he's nearly there... Great chapter!

I suspect that the Judge rulled correctly on the law, which means that the law needs to be amended, ASAP! I think that the law should make it clear that luring a minor or someone the defendant believed to be a minor should both be equally illegal: Throw the book as the predator. However, even though the case is reprehensible, I can't fault the judge if he ruled in accordance to the law (that, after all, is his job). I just wish that the defendant wasn't getting away with this. That disgusts me. The issue of minors is, in my opinion, one that needs to be looked at closely regarding what the defendant plausibly believed. I'll give a real-life case as an example: A friend of mine in Phoenix was 20. He started talking with a guy at a club that you have to be 19 to enter. The guy was a Junior in college. The guy also told my friend directly that he was 19. My Friend asked the "19" year-old out on a date. Apparently things went well, and after a few more dates, they became more than friends. Then, the new boyfriend mentions, offhand, that's he's turning 18 in a few days. He'd been lying about his age due to having started college at 16, and also to get into the club (which was where my friend asked him his age). The 17 y/o didn't see why any of this was a "big deal", though he apologized for his initial lie. I should mention that Arizona does not have an age of consent. My friend, however, freaked, and phoned me. He really liked his new boyfriend, but was panicked over the law. Technically, my friend did break the law. He met a minor (in person rather than online, granted) and pursued a sexual relationship. However, he had no idea that there was a minor involved, and had sound reasons to believe otherwise. This is why I feel that intent is so important in legal matters. My other is this: Just because someone SAYS they are not a minor, doesn't mean they aren't. So, be very careful online. My own personal rule is that there are two kinds of people that I won't flirt with online: Minors and adults. Anyone else is fair game. As a side note, the aforementioned friend and the boyfriend have been together for the three years since the event I recounted, and are planning a commitment ceremony this summer.

I agree! Bad Rick for leaving us another cliffie! Seriously though, great chapter, and I hope Dexter will be ok. Edit to add: This is the Centennial post in this thread! Congratulations, Rick!

Happy Birthday, Vance.

I loved the snippets, some sad, others hopeful, yet others beyond hope, all connected by the train station! Great job!

Shdowgod knows what of he speaks regarding campfires. He's posted pictures of his own camping trip in this post in the "Shot of Bourbon" thread. The enormous blazing inferno that shdowgod created took several guys to dig. Had Chris and Steve followed his advice, they would still have been digging when Eric arrived, leaving Eric with an even larger firewood supply. :fire: But. he's right, for a real camping trip, nothing beats a real firepit. Ummm, which plot device? Driving the Charger into the Grand Canyon? Of course!!! It's so easy to do because of your anonymity. But, seriously, it was you who inspired me to change the last word in the chapter from "rocks" to "cliffs". OK, I have a serious question for everyone! In Ch 22, when Steve is hit by a tranquilizer dart, I originally had it written so that Chris noticed a flash in the darkness. The reason I wrote it that way is that the darts I researched use a tiny explosive charge to inject the target, and this causes a small flash in the darkness, and it says so on their website. Most .50 calibre darts use a very similar design, so I think the same would apply. However, more than one person who saw the original commented that air rifles (which is what the dart gun is) don't make a flash. I considered altering the text so that Chris sees the dart itself flash, but that looked clunky. Therefor, I altered it so that he just didn't notice the flash (due to the dart hitting Steve out of Chris' line of sight). The basic issue here is: it would be technically correct to have the dart flash, but as most people don't know that, it read odd so i removed it. What I'd like to know is; in future situations such as this, would you prefer that I use the actual information in full, or just use a plot device (such as Steve being hit in a place that wasn't in Crhis' line of sight) to omit the detail (which was irrelavant to the plot). Thanks!! CJ

I certainly agree about the cliffhanger, but I must profess my innocence regarding influence; it is shdowgod who is a bad influence on me. I loved this chapter... One part that especially caught my eye was that Jacob was more interested in discussing the future than in sex. He's showing signs of maturity. He's certainly matured during the story, and kudos to shdowgod for painting such a realistic change, and doing it so well. See, shdowgod? I'm good for something besides tormenting you... Welcome to GA, Aillie, (I know I said that already, but I wanted to say it again!) and thank you so much for sticking around! Colin, I LOVE that turn of phrase you used to describe some of shdowgod's cliffhangers; nail-biting tongue-chewing sweat-dripping cliffhanger This ending was indeed portentous; what will Cody do? I'm starting to like Cody as a character, so I hope he does the right thing, and also I hold out hope that he'll become a recurring character.

This was very moving, and it allowed me, someone who hasn't been in that situation, to identify with the character. I especially liked the very creative use of tense-shifting to denote the "present" from the reminisces. Very skillfully done. Great story!

I liked the way this chapter worked out! I thought that Jeremy was going to have to "break the news" but Gio spared him the trouble. Zach certainly made the right choice (overdue IMHO). And I note the presence of a coffee table... Bondwriter, I think you are right: something is brewing...

This chapter (21) illustrates all too well that for many people in wheelchairs due to spinal injuries, there is far more involved than merely being unable to walk. Brian passing out is (guessing here) a complication of his condition, but I'm at a loss as to what it might be.

How are the taxes paid? Isn't a big chunk of that 85 cents per gallon going to be taxes paid by the retailer?

This started off great (though not for Ryan) with the recount of recent years, and then got better. I loved the humor, especially the closing lines.

Another tour-de-force by a master wordsmith! Shadowgod has a great gift for rich and evocative narration, and uses it beautifully. Cody and Mike are the most improbable pair, yet this has such a real feel to it. Cody's attitude, his anger, his mannerisms, all fit eerily well, as does Mike's personality. I especially liked the way Mike refrained from a physical relationship with Cody, as it would have made him seem questionable had he not. Shadowgod's distinctive style is also a centerpiece of his current serial, "Living in Surreality", and his classic "A Shot of Bourbon". Thank you, Shadowgod, for an excelent story!

Wow... That was spectacular! The dynamics were very well done... I also noticed that the "suicides" such as the one that destroyed the European base, and almost the Russian one, were all too believable. The underlying theme seems to be Duty, to the detriment of Josh and Chris' relationship. I also noticed the underlying theme, not only in the war itself but in the murder-suicides on the moonbases, that the fault is inherent in man's nature. This was a magnificent short story, Graeme!!!