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Green and Chaz... Ouch...and shame on Selene for comparing your relationships..and it implies you haven't grown or changed. How did Selene go from telling Green that he better be with Chaz and its the best thing since hugs were invented to Chaz is abusing Green? OMG!! I mean it was clear to everyone that Chaz and Mike were in a heated argument that had nothing to do with Green and dealt with deep issues regarding Chaz and Mike and their childhood and abuse issues that were inflicted upon them and all in the middle of Mike coming out and the pain that Chaz feels regarding the abuse both experienced. I mean if Selene heard any of that and having been told about it (especially Chaz's blog entry regarding his brother and his comments) it is clear that Chaz is not abusing Green and they are not in an abusive relationship....it was an accident and Chaz and Green love each other and have never been abusive toward each other and are working on communication issues and keeping it real in their love for each other....how wonderful is that!! I feel its amazing and extraordinary and love as magical and special as Rainbows:) Chaz feels horrible enough about all of that and about the accident with Green...I don't understand Selene...I feel bad for her but in that I really believe she is way off track and off the rail on this...I am still hoping she comes around...I am sure Chaz tried his best to talk sense to Selene..sad that she has closed herself off on this.... I feel you did the right thing Green..I hope that you and Chaz get away as you said you are...maybe upon your return things will calm down....fingers crossed...and I hope Selene comes to her senses and understands it was an accident and not intentional and far from abuse..... To me, Green and Chaz are a loving couple who do their best to keep it real and we all have issues but yours is a loving relationship and you are working on communication and keeping it real......Amen, brothers:) Hugs and more Hugs sent your way and extra Huggles:) Michael

Well Mr. Mikie...while Mr. Green and Mr. Chaz are eating the M and Ms (yummy delicious:) they can give each other huggles:) hee hee.....there should be a candy named Huggles in honor of Mikie:) and Mikie's new pengiun is very huggable:) Chaz and Green, I hope you are engaging in huggies:) and kisses too with each other...winks:) Michael

Dom, I am back East in New Jersey and I have to say this is the freakiest weather I have ever remembered. One day as you said it super hot and the next day it freezing (in one day the temperature can up or down 40 to 60 degrees) On one Sunday in February we had over 2 feet of snow in one day (a record for a day's snowfall for us) and by the end of the week it was gone and in the 60s...go figure. Mother Nature is not happy with us.... Ouch as to the cookies and your hands...One of my friends watches Battlestar Gallatica (and an ex BF does..he loves sci fi) and I don't get it and like you I don't watch much tv and so I can't get into what's going on and why. I am not a country fan...not much of one so I can relate to not being able to listen to the music you love to find inspiration. I say dump the cookies and begin again...its only cookie dough....somehow I am betting your two puppies will find their way to the cookies found on the floor.....like your puppy found the lasagna:) I was also thinking I can't believe you get people screaming at you to change your stories etc....all I kept thinking was WTF...I mean since when does anyone have the chance to call an author on an article or a book or short story or a play and demand changes.....its like everyone is a Hollywood Producer and critic.....what happened to reading the stories for the pure joy of them....oh well....and then there is the humor and the guessing but what will happen next and why and predictions...that's always fun...but to tell an author what to write and how to write..boy am I ever mystified by that one....as I scratch my goatee and buzz cut and wonder my oh my....oh well. I hope your hands feel better and aren't burned badly and that the weather stays consistent...its lack of consistency has kicked my butt health wise (ups and downs kill my sinuses and ear issues..grrrr) Good Luck with work and get some rest and feel better:) and I hope you get the music you want at work:) Michael

Chaz and Green:) I very much hope you enjoy Spring Break:) Good for you and go and enjoy:) As to Selene, I totally agree with what Bev said. Chaz did nothing wrong and I hope she works it out with him but he has nothing to feel guilty about concerning Selene. I hope she finds her way back to her dear friends. BTW Green maybe you and Chaz can help Julio together and take Chaz with you on the effort to find a place for Julio. This way twice the effort and twice the brain power and Chaz and Green can bond and hopefully all will feel better about getting to know each better and communications are out in the open. Even my head is spinning concerning David...I hope he is deciding to stay with Steven....I am sure that's his plan....fingers crossed for both of them:) I hope all is well for you all:) I think Chaz and Mike's big bro is cool and its smart of him to wait for Mike to come to him when Mike is ready:) and I know he will be supportive:) Michael

Green, see, I knew you were a smart wonderful Guy with an amazing heart and sense of justice..and yep, I gathered you were only selling the doubles of the cds..which is cool... as to Selene, on this I totally agree with you....as I said if it was a situation where there was an injustice or violence or mean spirited words...you and for that matter Chaz and David (and I used to think Selene) would discuss it and work from there. I simply believe that Chaz did nothing wrong and your response is a healthy one and simply one said from decency, respect, love and honesty and goodness...its that simple. I hope that Selene can calm down...but I for one feel in my heart and soul and mind you did the right thing and set appropriate boundaries here. As you said if you thought Chaz or if it were someone else was acting inappropriately or did something inappropriate (or if it were you) then you discuss it and speak your mind and they you. Once the situation was explained to Selene I feel it should have been her accepting nothing bad happened to you on purpose and with intention and desire to harm you. end of story... I pray and hope she comes to understand that and I also hope that you and Chaz take time away now to get away together and be at one with each other:) Good Karma and Hugs and Best wishes for your Love and Happiness sent to you and Chaz (and you deserve it) and I am sure Selene will come around....till then you did the right thing...go love your Man and get the hell out of there and go enjoy each other:) Michael

Chaz and Green, Um, I guess Chaz, people didn't read that you were only selling the duplicates and stuff that Green has stored in other areas. I don't have an ipod (I have ear trouble to begin with with my hearing etc..took long of a story going back to childhood) since I hate putting ear plugs in. I know why Green has kept the Garbage Pail Kids..they are an emotional connection to Johnathan....that makes sense and he appears to be a collector of Ninja Turtles (which at this point I bet if you check on ebay are worth a lot of GREEN...MONEY GREEN..compared to the sentimentality of their worth to Green...so I undertand that) I remember reading Green's early blogs where Selene would smack him in the head and bitch slap him and tell him that he needs to be with you and you alone...I don't understand her concern....you didn't purposely hurt Green nor intend to..unfortunately, as I said a Keystones Cops comedy of errors occurred and like in the movies poor Green was just being Green when what happened happened by pure mistake. I firmly believe that you would rather cut your limbs off before ever hurting Green. Given all that happened, I know Green Knows this and that is what matters. I have stated from my heart how I feel in my prior entries..to me you two are married and as partners I feel you and he come first to each other...friends are cool but they are friends, who should respect you both as each other's husbands/partners/lovers particularly where its such a loving relationship (i.e. not abusive, not hurtful, not verbally or emotionally or physically abusive, etc.) Ok before I blather on way too much...I really do hope that you both get away from it all....and remember you are each other's strength and love....above all else no matter what:) Rainbow Hugs sent your way and Good Karma and Lots of Love.... Michael

Happy Birthday Dan!!! As Tim said, we hope Trebs provides you with um..inspiration..yeah, that's the ticket:) I hope you have a wonderful magical romantic Birthday and a Fabulous, Healthy and Happy Year!! Michael

Hey Chaz and Green, I couldn't agree more with what RHawkes and James said...fly away, get away, make it a honeymoon of sorts and make beautiful love together..enjoy each other..you need it. As to Chaz's twin, I believe RHawkes got it right....Chaz your twin is in major league pain..I feel that he has been cold all these years as his own self defense mechanism...it kept people away since I am betting he feels shame, pain, anger, hurt and self loathing.....It will take maybe a life time of therapy but I know deep down inside he loves you....he just has a lot of pain.....I pray and hope he can find his way..I am betting he does. I am also sure that he looks at you and Green and sees the love you have for each other and I still stand by he wants that soo desperately and needs love desperately except I am betting he feels trapped in his own body, mind and soul and is torturing himself and feels tortured. I know that you will give him the support and love you have....that's just you and its also Green. I do also believe Selene loves all of you but I feel its now Chaz's place as Green's partner to stand in and take care of Green....its time for Mama Selene to let her son go....she will also be Mama Selene but Green is now Chaz's partner, who would no more harm him then cut off his own limbs first before he ever let harm come to his Green. I also am glad that we told Green to communicate (even via online blog entries) but now with something like this the big step is to tell Chaz face to face....it would have stopped a lot of pain..of course the fact that poor Green was stunned and in pain...someone should have told Chaz for him...and then I still say instead of locking Green away in a room...grab Chaz and Green..let them calm down together so they can communicate face to face..it would help keep things calm and they would know they love each other and of course shed the tears, hug each other and then get poor Green to get stitches... ah..hindsight is 20/20.... well, love you all and I hope you both get away and take your time to be together away from the mess and to enjoy that special partner/romantic time together:) Michael

Kevin, the coming months are a new beginning..scarey, fun, interesting, a new blank canvas to paint life as you wish..except the good thing is you have created and developed amazing life skills in the last few years..You are going to be fine and wonderful and think of it as an adventure..Sort of like Mary Tyler Moore tossing up your hat in the middle of the town square as you know you are beginning a new life and ain't it grand:) Besides which you have your online family of friends to chime in..not to mention your own family will visit...I am sure that you will have college mates visiting and I have read a number of times you want to get closer to your female cousin that you believe is a Lesbian..what better way to say to her, come on and visit for a few days and bring your girlfriend....(this way she knows you know and its natural and cool) and then tell her if you feel safe and comfy that you can all get to some cool gay spots and maybe they can help you scope them out as you scope out the hot guys:) and potential boyfriends.....and say it in that amazing kind natural way you have about you with your wonderful excitement and joy of life and optimism that makes you extraordinary and pretty cool:) Michael

Chaz and Green, grrr..I just lost what I was trying to write...first of all, Green tell Selene she has nothing to fear..have her read Chaz's blog entry. Green was trying to get protect Chaz and Chaz was trying to keep Green away from the situation and like a bad Keystones cop scene, Green got hit....Chaz didn't do it on purpose and never would. I think Chaz would rather die first then ever hit or hurt Green. Yes, you are so right that Chaz's twin needs a lot of psychological help. But as we all know, he has got to want to get the help or else its for naught....I am sure he realizes he needs help....and its not shaming to ask and get the help. I pray and hope he does. I know David and his brother are cool and will be fine...they have seen worse I am sure. we all have. Taking Chaz away for a few days would be good...but before doing that make sure that you are both ok emotionally, which may mean that Chaz needs to see a therapist to sort out some stuff in his head and Green you too and of course communicate with each other....please do that....next time, Selene locking you away from Chaz, is probably not such a good idea..as you can tell from Chaz's entry he thought you were angry at him (and maybe next time he may think you are packing your bags and leaving..and you have a history of doing that) Maybe next time (and sorry to yell at you Green...and Selene too) let Chaz take care of Green and bring him to the ER and to be there for his lover and partner. Mother Selene sometimes needs to let go of her baby cubs...its will be ok.. Fortunately, this will work out ok..but it still appears to me (in my humble opinion) that there is again a sad comedy of bad errors in no communication in which there is no communication and actions could be misconstrued. Fortuntely, when Selene locked Green away in a room, and Green was ill, Chaz didn't think Green was leaving..but he did think Green was angry at him.....seems to me that you two need to communicate with each other..if Green is hurt, its Chaz's place as your partner to tend to you and rally the troops and the same thing for Green to do if Chaz is hurt.... I pray and hope that you both get away, get your heads together and clear your minds and put into motion rules of communication since it seems that there will be a lot to deal with in the coming days and months. Remember you love each other and its important to communicate that love for each other and if you are upset to communicate that, including if you are physically and emotionally hurt, angry, in pain, sick, etc...that's what partners do for each other. Ok, nuf of me ranting..but I love Selene and she meant well but next time I hope someone has a clear head to stay calm and get the help and let each other know you still love each other and its going to be ok (and Green being hit in the head and having seven stitches and locked in a room away from his boyfriend, who hit him on accident, one would think Green was pissed and angry and going to leave Chaz) Now, maybe Selene didn't know that what happened was an accident...did someone, anyone tell her that? Maybe she was in mother mode too because she thought that Chaz intended to hit (rather then seek to protect Green from the argument between Chaz and his twin) So, I am not trying to blame anyone but in that melee I sure hope that in the future people talk and not fight..and if there is a melee someone speaks fast and takes action to get things calm. That is very hard to do with a melee but I sure hope that you all work it out....Chaz and Green take your time to give each other the love and support you need (and you will need lots of it in the coming days) and just know that Chaz's twin will need support...it will be ugly lots and pain can be tough when expressed.... Just remember love is the answer and communication and forgive me for being all over the map on this entry since I have tons going on in my head trying to sort it all out..I just pray and hope you are all ok:) Hugs and Love sent to all of you:) Michael

Xander:) Congratulations!!! No, I wasn't part of the live chat...but sooo coollllll to hear that you are in the play:) And this way you also get extra instant bonding with new people in the group stuff of singing and dancing you will do within the play..a play/musical within a play/musicals:) Congratulations to Meghan too:) Now, this is your big chance to get close to cute and hot dancer guys and singers:) and to develop great friendships:) Go for it and enjoy and take the time to enjoy all of it and keep up the friendships after the play ends. Did you find out what happened to the Gay neighbor? Did he move? I hope not and I hope you found him and are developing a friendship there:) Let us know!! Bravo and standing ovations for you and Meghan:) and your whole group!! Michael

Xander....ouch ouch ouch..I hope you are feeling better. Wait did you try out for the school play and did you make it? grrrr..a cliffhanger in the making from your last blog entry and you didn't mention it.....please don't keep us in suspense! Michael

Hi I hope you are feeling better very soon:) I just read chapter 4.....amazing chapter...and ugh...cliffhangers.....well, you sure know how to write a sweet, amazing story but damn you sure as heck know how to write a cliffhanger...no writers block there:) I am sooooo enjoying your story....its incredibly wonderful:) Michael

Chaz and Green, First of all Chaz, hugs, big hugs.....you said you are there for your brother but you are whom you are and he is whom he is. Individuals. I believe with therapy and time your twin will come around. He has a long journey ahead of him. I am wondering if his coldness and distance relates (and I bet it does) and the walls he built up around him to the abuse he suffered. You suffered it to but you knew and accepted at an early age that you are Gay and knew that when you found love you were going to grab onto it and not let it go. I sense that your twin has always known he is Gay but felt he couldn't express it, had a lot of self loathing and fear. He was under the mistaken impression for most of his life that the sexual predator made him Gay and he may associate being Gay with that incident. So, to me, he has a long long road ahead of him to love himself first and then his family and will probably shed the old friends and find more loving accepting ones. I know that you will be there for him and fortunately you have amazing parents who will be there for him to. In the end, I know that his walls and barriers and pain (he clearly has a lot of pain) will hopefully come down and be replaced by self acceptance and love. You are in a far different place and have a lot of love to not only give but you receive lots of love. I also know that you will be there for your twin as he goes through his therapy (and I sure hope he decides to see a therapist.) I also hope that you continue with therapy and find a therapist you trust. One thing I have to say is I found your words to your brother very healthy. I am proud of you that you know that you are not responsible for what happened. That to me is huge! Even more proud of the fact that even though you suffered abuse that you are so loving and giving and refuse to let that abuse keep you down. Green is a lucky man to have you in his life and you are lucky to have Green in yours......Just remember that you do love each other and Green its important to communicate. I don't say this next to get you upset since I am sure that you were major league upset but things like locking oneself in a room without letting Chaz know that you are not angry or upset you just need to decompress can lead to a bad comedy of errors and bad assumptions where others can assume you are so upset that you are done with Chaz etc...and then well the drama gets worse and the pain gets worse and the laws of unintended consequences get worse and someone says oh yeah (usually someone without the facts) Green is pissed and angry (when you said you aren't) and then assumptions escalate and Chaz assumes you dumped him and bags are packed or you take off again...well you get the drift.... I am glad you are not angry and love your Chaz man:) Good luck to all and I hope no one is physically hurt..... Hugs to all:) Michael

Mikie....I couldn't have said it better!! extra huggles for you and for our friend Kevin:) Michael

Val....um, throw away and toss the other person's undies....then tell the BF that he has to get you ones of your choice:) And I agree Chapter 35 was the best so far...and what a cliff hanger... Michael

Bao, the gay gene choice? With the humblest of respect, we don't get to choose our genes (just our jeans). It is just my humble opinion that genetics determine (and not we humans) sexual orientation. I also believe to some degree that Kinsey had a point and there is a sliding scale for some (for lack of a better word) in that genetically there can a range on this..from straight to 100 per cent gay and bisexuality is somewhere in between and some bisexuals have more of an attraction or closer to one sex then the other (meaning some can find more of an attraction to one sex over the other) I feel Kevin did a great job explaining the whole concept quite well...thanks Kevin:) Michael

Viv...extra hugs to you and Ann Marie....now, hmmm..how do we tell the student in her class not to do what he is doing? GLSEN to the rescue..I am sure there are methods to stop that bad behavior and where was the teacher that he/she didn't step in to stop that bad behavior. I don't understand why Rich (ok Viv don't bitch slap me) has to cut his hair....that is profiling on the police part and in my humble opinion illegal and why do they care or even ask why he has a zillion Girl Scout cookies in his car...yep...that's the truth....fathers with long hair with Girl Scout cookies really are going to cause crime sprees..what is wrong with the Police....don't they have better things to do..like fight crime then pick on Dads with Girl Scout cookies....um, excuse me Your Honor we booked the defendant on the suspicion that he has long hair and really was using the Girl Scout cookies defense to protect himself ..but we all know he is deviant long haired hippy...um, what century are we in? pleasssee!!! Ok, enough of my cranky sarcasm.... Your son is a hoot...and gotta love Ann Marie....I see her as like a Power Ranger..defending us from dumb asses of the world.... Michael

Kevin, I think you began your own power, independence, acceptance and freedom in your blog. Love is Love..and you expressed it well. Genetics are Genetics (I am one who believes that sexual orientation is based upon genetics and not choice) From there we have as you said all sorts of levels (as Kinsey wrote about) Labels suck and people are flesh and blood with human emotions. We all have likes and dislikes (for me by way of example I am attracted to dark haired men (even If I was born a blond and my hair ended up sandy brownish..more brownish) but within that there are exceptions...I think red headed Guys are hot...I like taller, but I don't have a rule..when asked if I have a type..I say nope..it depends upon the Guy as to whether or not it fits him and then I take it from there. As you said there are many beautiful women, physically and spiritually, but for me I don't have a sexual attraction to them.... well, you get the point. In any event, you expressed yourself perfectly....and beautifully....all making you as Viv said "Kevin"..who is going to make a Guy one very very lucky man to have you as his lifemate/husband/partner/best friend. Beyond all that you really express the dynamics of love, freedom, independence and acceptance very well:) Lots of golden nuggets of love and wisdom in your blog entry:) I will be reading it for some time since its a powerful one full of love, truth and wisdom:) Thaks for sharing it with us:) Hugs sent your way:) and um, I agree with Kitty and Viv.....standing ovations for Kevin:) then more hugs! Michael

Chaz, I am not a therapist....Your twin has a lot of issues...and it appears to me that his claims that the guy made him Gay is either based upon your twin's ignorance on the issue (as we all know we are not made Gay by anything other then genetics) or in his mind a rationalization since that the man made him Gay because your twin has self esteem and self loathing issues and has not come to terms to accept that he is Gay, was molested as a boy and somehow in his mind its easier to blame you. Maybe its best to get your own therapist. When I was in therapy, I chose a Gay therapist. It was for me safety issues and comfort zone issues. I knew that I wouldn't feel comfortable discussing my issues with a straight therapist or even a female therapist (my issues ranged from and include co dependency and many child hood issues, self esteem, self worth issues, acceptance of myself as being Gay and how I feel my family treated because of it, etc.) Fortunately, like you, I feel so alive and comfortable in my skin now as a Gay Man...I can't say I always felt that way...it was a long journey begun with many tiny steps. I do hope that you have nothing to do with your twin's issues. You didn't cause him to be Gay (he clearly has self loathing issues to me when I hear him bitterly complain that he is a "faggot" caused because of what the family friend did to him.) Remember to be there for your twin...offer him support, explain how you came to terms with accepting that you are Gay...that you, Green and your friends offer a support group for him..that there are Gay support groups to reach out and offer him help. As Libodono said, you can use this to bring you closer to your twin and he to you. Maybe its the barrier/brick wall that has come crashing down now and you and he can be drawn closer and it will take time but its a good start to reach out tell him that you love him, are here for him and will do all you can to help him as he comes Out and comes to terms with his own self acceptance and self awareness as a Gay man. For you, I hope that you can find a good therapist (and yeah, I agree one you chose and not Green's...not seeking to knock Green's therapist but its his and you need to feel very comfortable of one of your own chosing) I hope your twin finds the therapy he needs. You can only be there for him but I stress this (and I am not a therapist) but and its a big BUT you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Your twin's issues are his and NOT yours so don't make his stuff yours or feel you are responsible for his issues. YOU most certainly are NOT and take that from this co dependent who took many many years to learn that...my stuff is mine and its not healthy for me (or for anyone) to take on anyone's issues (no less family members) I just wish I could do more and say more that would make sense. But I can offer hugs and good thoughts and remember your twin took a first big step, he admitted he is Gay....the journey of a life time begins in small one step at a time....he will have far to journey but its his to do at his pace...yours is yours...you have a wonderful relationship with Green (and I still say your twin looks at you and Green with longing in his heart to have what you and Green have..a happy loving committed Gay relationship...one he hopes for but I am betting can't express so when added to his own issues it comes out (no pun intended) in one huge messy mess of anger, angst, longing to no longer live a lie and so on. Hence, his statement that he would pretend to be you so he can trick or fool Green to me his way of saying he wants a Green in his life....a boyfriend to love as you and Green love each other. Just remember......deep breaths...maybe have your twin read one of Dom's stories....Your twin seems to be having a Quinn moment so maybe start him with The Ordinary Us......maybe he can find comfort and knowledge in it. I am sure there are all sorts of websites to help him with his Coming Out Process and coming to terms with self acceptance. Chaz, just know....you did nothing wrong (to borrow a phrase from The Ordinary Us) and there is nothing wrong with you and maybe your twin can hopefully see there is nothing wrong with him and that he is going to be ok. Love and Hugs and Peace sent your way:) Michael

Happy Birthday, Sumbloke!!! Here is to an amazing year for you and then some!!! Much Good Health, Happiness and Wonderful and Peaceful Good Karma sent your way, now and always:) Michael

Chaz and Green, Hugs to both of you and to Chaz's twin too....I hope everything goes well:) Good and Peaceful Karma and Prayers and Good thoughts and Hope and Love sent your way:) Michael

Dom, I actually switched back to the old style pre wireless keyboard. I have a wireless one and hate it. It ate batteries like mad.....give me the good old fashioned keyboard with a mouse to plug into it..and it saves on batteries that only need to be recycled and mess with the environment..any way, that's my excuse..um, I mean story, and I am sticking to it. I am glad to hear that your dog is adjusting:) Back East we have had super strange weather (in a day it can go from 60 degrees to 20 degrees...one week we had a record snow fall in one day (over two feet) on a Sunday and by Friday all that snow was melted.. Mother Nature isn't happy with us....and those who think there is no global warming..yeah right! Good luck with the wireless keyboard. Michael

Chaz and Green:) That is an awesome family night!! Gold medals all the way around:) Has anyone asked David's brother why he didn't say anything? Just curious as to whether or not anyone asked him and what his response was. It sounds like he wasn't Out then either and maybe he was afraid that he would be Outed and thrown out of the house too..but then again he would have had David with him. I bet it was pure and simple fear and anxiety and from the perspective of a teen about to be kicked out, I am betting he just felt like the deer in the headlights and froze. But David, his brother and sister have now and can move forward in positive manners rather then dwell on a horrible past and they can grow closer together in the here and now:) Michael

Chaz, You didn't do a thing to your identical twin. As Kitty said, whatever issues he has and in my humble opinion, your twin has lots of issues that HE (not you) is struggling with. The one person that can help him is HIM. Your twin has to take the first steps. All you can be is whom you are..open and receptive to listen to him. If he needs therapy, he has to take the first steps. I hope you don't beat yourself up over this because you did NOTHING wrong. I am betting that your twin's GF is blaming you because she knows something is off kilter so rather then face reality its beat up on you...If your twin is Gay, he is Gay..if he is str8 then he is str8..he is the one and only person who knows for sure. My bet is Green is correct (I stand corrected, your twin probably doesn't lust after Green) in that your twin sees what you and Green have and he wants that (meaning to be able to be openly Gay) and whatever longing he has in his heart and mind to be free, he may just be struggling with his own inner demons. All you can do is be there for him..let him know you are there if he wishes to talk and confide in you with his troubles and worries and pains etc...beyond that, say your prayers, hope for the best, be open and receptive as you have been..its then up to him to take the initiative after you tell him all that. Maybe you and your family members can check in with each other to see if anyone has heard from him. It appears as if his GF will be of no help..sorry to slam her but that's just how I see it. Hugs sent your way and I am still guessing he is Gay....whatever else he is struggling with is also beyond your reach other then to be there for him. Michael