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JamesSavik

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Everything posted by JamesSavik

  1. JamesSavik
  2. JamesSavik
    My Mom's house was like a museum. She collected rocks from every trip she took. This one came from Missouri, this one came from Texas, this one came from Arid-zona.... Getting rid of them would be a crime against history. 🙄
  3. JamesSavik
    Saints fans' frustrations are exacerbated by their dominate performance in their first two wins. Then all their old geezers got injured, and the team is dead as a hammer.
  4. JamesSavik
    Urban Meyer's tenure with the Jacksonville Jaguars was the gold-standard of the lackadaisical football coach. Actually, he was worse.
  5. JamesSavik
    My friend Justin is notorious for bending straight guys. I guess everybody needs a hobby.
  6. JamesSavik
    My Mom always knew. She would come home to a clean kitchen and the roast in the over, she would set her lip and say: All right. What did you do?
  7. JamesSavik
    Hi-Fi or High Fidelity is an attribute of stereo systems which faithfully reproduce audio. Modern systems can faithfully amplify sound from sources ranging from turntables, CDs, video and digital audio.
  8. JamesSavik
    Most people are baffled by lawyers' circumlocution. Why use a few well-chosen words when a verbose word salad can confuse, intimidate or cover your ass? Sometimes it seems if they are paid by the word.
  9. JamesSavik
    Ow, ow, ow! In Mississippi, there is late summer and winter. The weather falls off a cliff. Yesterday it was 80 (27.2 C). Today it's 41 (5 C) and my knee is bitching about it loudly. Maybe I need a rheumatologist.
  10. JamesSavik
    You might be an urbane redneck if you have no holes in your jeans and offer a stranger a cold beer on a hot day.
  11. JamesSavik
    My inveterate procrastination is often accompanied by twenty-five open tabs and I have no idea where the music is coming from.
  12. JamesSavik
    With my allergies, after treating them, my otolaryngologist retired and bought a huge boat.
  13. JamesSavik

    Chapter 6

    JamesSavik commented on JamesSavik's story chapter in Chapter 6

    Yes. Maybe...
  14. JamesSavik
    My blood type is B-. When this was first discovered in my teens, they hit me up for donations until I told the hematologist he might as well save his needles and install a zipper.
  15. JamesSavik
    Cats are ridiculously overpowered!
      • 4
      • Haha
      • Wow
  16. JamesSavik
    I'm not horrified by myths. The Mummy or Vampire don't excite me. Give me a plausible reason to actually feel anxiety. I like stuff like The Andromeda Strain, Event Horizon, or Alien. We only think we're an advanced civilization, but we're only a few thousands years out of trees. We don't know what we don't know. What we don't know can hurt us badly.
  17. JamesSavik
    My parents' house got run over by Hurricane Katrina. There was no electricity for over a week. As their freezer thawed out, we had epic barbecues. It was miserable as it was still hot as blazes in early September. Sure - we're a good 90 miles inland, but Katrina was so nasty because it was moving so slow. From start to finish, it was over us for 36 hours of noisy, exciting weather that turned telephone poles into splinters. Some of our trees were so damaged, they died over the next few years and had to be removed. We had a blue FEMA roof until we could get a crew to re-roof the house. You don't appreciate refrigeration and air conditioning until they're gone for a while.
  18. JamesSavik
    I despise oncologists for the hell they put my brother through. He had bone marrow cancer - that's 100% terminal. They bullshitted us into trying a bunch of stuff that didn't work and stuck his widow with a $300K bill. They are shysters selling hope to desperate people knowing they are going to get their loved one's house. Fuck them.
  19. JamesSavik
    Oncologists are about as useless as plague doctors. None of their patients survive to leave a bad review on Yelp.
  20. JamesSavik
  21. JamesSavik
    So I told the gastroenterologist that without dinner and a show, he could keep his telescope to himself.
  22. JamesSavik
    Who needs a poltergeist? I've got cats. Something is always going bump in the night. Sometimes it goes Rawr-RWOW when Cleo sees a bad raccoon.
  23. JamesSavik
    Sorry I didn't get anything out. I had a story, but I wasn't satisfied with it. I won't post an anthology entry that's only fit for the wood chipper.
  24. JamesSavik
    Because I have the skin type of a typical ginger despite only being a daywalker, I have to see a dermatologist once a year to check for skin cancer.
  25. JamesSavik
    Complaintoglogist often want to speak to the manager.
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