Not made for each other - 2. Mr. Arrogant

Zune

“Bye Kevin.” I responded with a blushing smile when he admitted his feelings to me. His smile got wider; even I had a beaming smile on my face.

I reluctantly walked inside my new home and closed the door behind me. There were some strange feelings blooming inside me which seemed so different and foreign to what I’ve ever felt before. I was delighted for no reason. It felt like I was in seventh heaven; floating in the air and I was the happiest person on this earth. I know I was voicing my thoughts like a hapless character of a ‘c-grade’ romantic flick but honestly, I was actually loving all this...a lot. My mom always complains that I behave like her grandfather, but now she would be happy to see me act like a normal, stupid teenager.

After completing my homework I came downstairs to prepare dinner, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the last twelve most amazing hours of my life. I hadn’t thought that the first day at my new school would be full of so many surprises. In a matter of hours, I had met many people who had colorful personalities and different ways of thinking, but the person who held all my attention was Kevin. He was charming, fun-loving, full of life, nice, hot and GAY. I was infatuated with him the moment my eyes landed on the handsome boy, when he saved me from the furious punch of that homophobe…what was his name...Eddie?...no…Eden?...no…it was something started with Ed..I guess it was Edward, yes Edward…Edward Woodsworth, whatever.

At lunch I shared my whole life with Kevin as if I had known him forever. I don’t know why but I felt like I could trust him more than anyone. When he voiced his feelings I was not stupefied or anything. The way he was looking at me, smiling at me, the way he was treating me; I anticipated that, but not so soon.

‘But the problem is I’m not sure what I feel about him. I guess I’m too young to decide whether it is love or an attraction or just friendship. And what about Kevin? He said he loves me but how can he be so sure. He’s also a teenager, possibly it’s just a phase or something, and after awhile he would think about all these feelings in a different way. Maybe what he felt this afternoon was not love but merely an infatuation. I don’t know whether the feelings I’m sensing are love or not. I’m not sure whether he actually loves me or not and I have no idea how would I be able to handle these new feelings emerging in my life. Huh…confusion...confusion...confusion and there is only one person who could help me out.’ I was still zoned out thinking about all of this when the phone rang. I put the prepared salad in the fridge and moved towards the living room. I was hoping that this could be Kevin calling, but when I picked it up, a familiar, loving voice greeted me, as usual.

“Hey kiddo, what’s up?”

“It’s half past eight and you are still not home. May I know why?” I asked, brushing off her question.

“Always straight to the point, aren’t you?”

“Could you please tell me when you will be home? Dinner is almost ready mom.” I asked again, snubbing her comment.

“Zune, I’m sorry but I won’t be able to come home tonight. I have a double shift so I won’t be home until nine in the morning.” She said apologetically.

“Mom, that’s not fair. I have been waiting for you since I got home from school, prepared your favorite food and now you are saying you are not coming.” I said disappointingly. I knew she’s the only one who could help me to figure out my dilemma…my mom…my best friend, and she’s not coming home tonight, GREATTT.

“Believe me hun, I do want to come home but I can’t help it.”

Now she was sounding disappointed with herself and I couldn’t let this happen, after all I knew it wasn’t in her hands. I tried to hide disappointment in my voice and responded, “It’s okay mom, no problem. Just do good work and I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”

She paused for few seconds and asked hopefully, “Hey kiddo can you come to Sausens? You know it’s on the way to your school.”

“Yeah, I know mom, but why?” I asked unable to get her point.

“Because I want to go out for dinner with my son.” She answered enthusiastically.

“But mom…”

Before I could object, she cut me off, “Zune, in twenty minutes I’ll have my hour-long break, so we can have dinner together. This way we would be able to meet and I won’t have to miss my shift.”

“But mom, it would be so tiring for you and I don’t….”

She cut me off again, “Oh please hun, stop acting like my grandfather. See you at Sausens in twenty minutes, okay? And yes, put that prepared food in fridge, bye.” With that, she hung up.

I knew she’s only doing this for me. She can’t stand to see me disappointed. I have always been her world. She was just seventeen when she got pregnant with me, and my father…he left her as he was not ready for such a huge responsibility, but my mom never ever said a word against him; I guess she still loves him. Since then, she never dated anyone and always played both the roles of my mother and father perfectly. My mother could have easily aborted me, that’s what her parents told her to do but she was not ready for that. She decided to bring me into this world. She moved with her parents to another city. When she was nineteen, her parents died in a car accident and she was left alone with me. She never enjoyed her life as she had me to take care of. I wish someday she could find her soul mate; someone who would give her the happiness she really deserves.

Sausens was in walking distance from my home; it would only take me fifteen minutes to get there. I decided to wear a pair of black jeans and a blue polo t-shirt; it was my favorite outfit in the summers. I was at Sausens before my mom. After waiting for about two minutes, she showed up with her beaming smile and glistening blue eyes, wearing her favorite black dress that she purchased a week ago. I stood up and hugged her lovingly when she arrived at our table.

“Hey kiddo, how are you?” She asked excitedly after being seated. That beautiful smile never left her face.

“I’m fine, what about you?” I responded with a grin and then ordered garlic bread and roasted chicken with sweet potatoes for us after studying the menu for few seconds.

“Everything is going fine…and hectic.” She sighed and started massaging her neck with her right hand.

“You look so tired mom. That’s why I…”

“Hun I’m fine, and now after seeing you I’m more than fine…believe me.” She cut me off again and assured me by squeezing my hand gently, and then changed the subject, “So, how was the first day of your new school?”

With the mention of school, the first face that flashed in my mind was Kevin’s and I felt my cheeks flush.

“Zune, you are blushing?!” It was a statement rather than a question. I didn’t reply, instead my smile got wider and my face got redder and it had not gone unnoticed by my great mother. I started staring raptly at one of the glasses placed upside down, by the corner of table.

“OMIGOD!!! Who’s the guy?” she asked zealously with an ear to ear smile.

“Mom, it isn’t anything like that.” I lied blushing, without looking at her.

“Of course yes. You are redder than red, constantly blushing like a girl, avoiding my gaze, a permanent smile is plastered over your face and you are saying it isn’t anything like that…Is it written somewhere on my face that I’m dumb? Now come on, tell me every detail right now. How did you guys meet? How does he look? Tall, dark, handsome? Have you guys had sex?” she asked inquisitively and I shot her a glance in total shock with my eyes wide open.

“MOM!! I know him for merely a day and you are talking about sex...puleeezzz. Today we just talked…talked a lot.” Finally I was able to tell her everything about the whole day. She listened with bright eyes and pulled every single detail out of me.

“Wow, sounds like a romantic movie to me. What an amazing day you had. But I don’t understand; why are you so worried?” she asked shrugging, when she was done drilling me.

“Mom, I don’t even know whether I’m serious about Kevin or not. I don’t know if these feelings are just an infatuation or more than that. I don’t know what he thinks he feels for me, truly feels for me. Maybe it’s just a hormonal kick or a puppy love and after awhile we would think of all these feelings in an entirely different way. I’m…I’m just so confused.” I put my doubts in front of her.

“Now that’s what I hate about you. You are just sixteen, why can’t you act like a sixteen year-old FOR GOD’S SAKE. Is it necessary for you to always behave like a father of two?” she chided. “I understand you don’t know whatever you guys are feeling is love or not but if you will not give it a chance, you will never know. I’m not saying you to jump to a conclusion instantly and tell him that you love him or anything, but please let him know that you are feeling something for him and before moving ahead in any serious relationship, you want to be sure that these feelings are ‘love’, that’s it. Just take it slow; you guys have plenty of time to explore these feelings and this relationship, even Kevin told you that he’ll wait for you as long as it takes, so till then you guys can maintain a relationship which is a step ahead of friendship and a step behind love.” she added patiently.

I nodded understandingly. She makes everything so easy, so simple.

“So just go with the flow hun, enjoy your ‘teenage-hood’ and have a lot of sex, but with precautions.” She concluded mischievously curling her lips.

“MOM PLEASE!!! STOP THIS. You know very well I’m one of those boring, old-fashioned guys who wait for their Mr. Right to experience ‘that feeling’ you are talking about. It will only happen with the right person at the right time. I want it to be special.” I said looking at nobody in particular.

“Oh gosh, stop acting that. Who waits for ‘Mr. Right’ to get laid nowadays?” she asked gazing at me like I’m the weirdest creature on this earth and then immediately answered her own question, “Of course only grandpas like you. When I was of your age I had…”

“Mom please, I’m not curious to know about your indecent moments, spare me. And now can we please talk about something else besides SEX?”

“You are no fun Zune, I don’t know what Kevin sees in you...poor guy.” She teased me and pouted like a five year old.

“Kev definitely found something which you can’t.” I replied with a faux smile.

“KEV...huh??” she chuckled and I flushed looking at my intertwined fingers, “Okay, okay, no more teasing I promise. Now tell me what do you think about the other guys you met today besides ‘KEV’?”

I smiled as she gave special emphasis on Kev and replied, “Everyone was nice and cool except Edward.”

“Come on, not like that, tell me in your unique style.” She demanded. I do have a bad and unusual habit; I used to express what I feel about people on their first impression on me in just two words…quite weird huh?

“Okay. Hmm…Jake…shy and timid, Mr. Fitzgerald…true and nice, Carol…sweet and blunt, Edward…arrogant and inhuman, Kevin…charming and HOTTT.” I remarked.

She laughed and then turned serious for a while, “Should I worry about this Edward guy? Do you want me to talk to your principal or his parents?” she asked, looking concerned.

“No mom, don’t worry about him. As I said, he got detention for a week and I don’t think he would do anything again to jeopardize his graduation, so there is no need to worry. And if I felt somewhere I want your help, I’ll ask you myself.” I assured her.

“Are you sure Zune? I mean, I just want you safe.”

“Yeah mom, I’m sure and there are Kev and Carol with me, and with them I’m more than safe, so you just chill.” I reassured her.

She was about to say something when her phone rang.

“Hey Cathy…yeah…but where is Samantha?...Okay don’t worry, I’ll be there in ten minutes…okay bye.” I knew she had to go now.

“So you have to go now, right?”

“Sorry hun there is an emergency. I have to go, okay?” she asked looking at me guiltily. I nodded to erase that guilty look from her beautiful face. She gave me a relieved smile. “Okay then, you enjoy your dinner and I’ll get something at work.”

She was about to leave her chair, when I stopped her. “Mom”

“Yeah?”

“You are the most amazing mom of the world.” I admitted proudly.

“Oh hun, tell me something new.” She said braggingly.

“Okay. You are looking horrible in this dress.” I gibed.

“ZUNE!!” she tried to show the fake shock on her face and then we both burst out laughing.

“Okay, I’m going now. Eat your dinner and give me a call when you are home.”

“Yeah mom. I will. And you are not going to skip your dinner, right?.” I insisted.

“Yes grandpa.” She jested.

Her phone started ringing again, she glanced at the caller ID flashing on the screen and sighed, “It’s Cathy again” she revealed furrowing her eyebrows. “I must leave hun, see you tomorrow. Take care, try to stay away from trouble, call me whenever you want and have fun with your ‘KEV’. Love you.” She grinned, kissed my forehead and rushed out towards the exit.

“Love you too mom.” I mumbled after she left. I truly believe in that old saying, ‘God can’t be everywhere with you, that’s why they created mothers.’

A minute later, my dinner arrived and I ate in silence thinking about Kevin. Tomorrow would be a new beginning for me…for us; the beginning of a new relationship. I wanted to see the look on his face when I let him know about my feelings, that moment would be priceless. And how would Carol react after knowing about us? I’m damn sure she would be extremely happy for us. I couldn’t wait for tomorrow. I paid for my food and left my table, walking out of the restaurant.

It was very dark outside but the weather was breezy and pleasant. I made my way towards home. I didn’t notice anything on my way as my thoughts were entirely captured by Kev. I was missing his natural smile, his shining, deep blue eyes, his attention…I was missing him. I was minutes away from my place when the mild breeze turned in to an intense wind and clouds started appearing in the sky. It was suddenly getting cold now. I quickened my steps cursing myself for leaving my windbreaker at home. A few steps ahead I noticed a guy fastening, (or unfastening), the left, front-side tire of a black Volvo. I couldn’t see his face as his back was facing me. It was about to rain and there wasn’t anyone else except us so I thought I should help him…such an idiot I was.

I went towards him and asked as politely as I could, tilting my head slightly to the left. “Hey, do you need some help?”

“Naah it’s almost d….” He stopped in mid-sentence as he stood up and turned around to face me. I regretted my decision to offer him help as soon as I realized who he was…none other than ‘Edward-Scoundrel-Woodsworth’. “What the hell are you doing here?” He asked annoyed, narrowing his eyebrows. He had a smudge on his left cheek. I guess he got that while replacing the flat tire.

“I don’t think you own this road.” I retorted back.

“Shut the fuck up,” he threatened and then asked dubiously, “are you stalking me?”

“WHAT? Me? Stalking you? Not even in my scariest dream.” I responded, shaking my head with utter disgust. How could he even think like that…eeeww.

“Are YOU stalking me?” I asked suspiciously.

“That’s the job of your fucking-fag-boyfriend, who was hovering around you the whole day like a faithful puppy,” he answered revoltingly.

“Don’t you dare to talk about Kev like that.” I warned him.

“KEV…huh?” he commented sardonically lifting his left eyebrow. He was leaning on his car now. His light brown hair was swaying because of the nipping wind. He fell silent for few seconds and then added, looking at his feet, “It means he IS your boyfriend. Isn’t he?” There wasn’t any hatred in his voice, instead of that I sensed a disappointment and gloominess there.

“That’s none of your bloody business.” I said squarely with an expressionless face.

“Yeah, for a change you are right. It’s not my business who fucks you, sucks you…” that loathing I was talking about, was back in his voice.

“Enough” I interrupted him sternly, “Shut your loathful mouth.” How could he be so…so…so disgusting? I couldn’t stand that filthiest creature on earth anymore. I started moving towards my home which was few steps away now; but he abruptly grabbed my wrist, tucked it behind my back, angrily pulled me closer, and in a moment I was cornered between him and his car. He acted so swiftly that I didn’t have a chance to respond.

“It’s not my mouth which is loathful; it’s you who’s sickened.” He growled. His one hand was still gripping my wrist while other one…I have no idea where it was; as I was so busy thinking about what is going on and what I should do. I was angry, irritated, nervous and…scared.

I was close enough to him to feel his warm breath on my face. “Leave me alone.” I tried to push him with my spare hand in my protest, but it was in vain.

“You perverts are degrading our society, country and the whole world.” He continued barking, ignoring me completely; my struggles to get away were hardly affecting him. A moment later, it was raining. Water was pouring down in buckets from the dark sky and we were soaked from head to toe within seconds. In a normal situation, I would have loved to get wet in the rain, but right now I was cursing it.

“What the hell do you want?” I asked irritated, still trying in vain to release my wrist from his firm grasp.

“People like you don’t have any right to live.” He turned a deaf ear to me and continued to shower his ‘love’ for the whole gay community.

I don’t know what was more disturbing; enduring his idiotic and insulting remarks about me and homosexuals, or being so close to him in this heavy rain. Water was dripping down from his face to his long graceful neck, then to his hairless chest and finally disappearing in his V-neck t-shirt which was clung to his firm and lean body. You can’t imagine how painful it was for me to admit that he was looking dangerously hot and sexy.

‘Edward?…sexy?…NO FUCKING WAY. Seriously, what the hell was wrong with me? I can’t think like that…no…not about this homophobe.’ I made a mental note to request Carol to kick my ass for even thinking like that, she’s very good at it.

I was getting extremely uncomfortable because of our physical closeness, and to maintain the distance of few centimeters left between us, my free hand was still pushing against his chest. I was breathing convulsively. My wrist which was still tucked behind me, was hurting like hell now. “Edward…please….” I begged, but he cut me off.

“DON’T YOU DARE SPEAK MY NAME!” he yelled, pulling me even closer. I flinched.

The rain hadn’t stopped yet and I was shivering with cold. “You…you are hur…hurting me. L-leave me alone.” I pleaded. My begging was doing nothing to him. The pain was becoming unbearable but I was still protesting, still trying to get myself freed from his clutches.

I don’t know what he wanted. If he actually wanted to take revenge of this morning’s incident then why was he wasting his time shouting? He could easily beat the crap out of me as no one else was around here, and I certainly could not fight back. He did have a perfect opportunity, why was he not utilizing it?’

Finally the rain had stopped, but freezing winds were making my situation worse. I was still shuddering severely and had goose bumps. I hadn’t much stamina left to even stand before him. I was sure that I was going to faint in a few minutes but that bastard, he continued hollering in a belligerent and hostile tone.

“You faggots don’t deserve rights, don’t deserve respect, love, nothing. You guys deserve just hatred, hatred and hatred. And you know what, I love to hate you.” I don’t think he could complete a sentence without yelling or having anger or detestation in his voice. “There isn’t much difference between you and a prostitute.” His disgustful words were penetrating my soul now. “Guys like you are fucked by their own brothers and fathers.” He snapped, looking directly into my eyes with hate.

My body stopped protesting with his last remark. I was not trembling, protesting, or trying to get away from him. I was just…numb. I looked in his malicious, dark brown eyes impassively. I don’t know when, how or why, but my eyes welled up with tears with the mere reference of the word ‘Father’. A few strands of my wet hair were bothering my left eye, with the help of the shivering winds; I hardly paid any attention to them.

“What did you say?” I asked emotionlessly.

He was standing there looking into my tearful eyes with an unreadable expression on his face. I don’t know what he was thinking but I think he looked hurt, why, I have no idea.

“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?” I bawled this time. All of a sudden he came out of his trance and the same abhorrence took over that hurt look on his face.

“I said there isn’t much difference between you and a prostitute. Guys like you are fucked by their own brothers and fathers.” He chortled with his patented demonic smile and continued, “I’m sure you do have fun sucking your own father’s di……”

I didn’t give him any chance to utter another single word from his foul mouth. I gathered all the power left in me, lifted my right foot from the ground and smashed my knee, which was exactly in-between his legs, upwards right into his manhood with full force. I don’t know from where that strength and courage came from. I think it was his biggest mistake mentioning the word ‘Father’. He reminded me the person I hate most, my father.

I attacked him so severely that he was on the wet ground now, a few steps away from me, both his hands cradling his wounded crotch. He was crying in pain, tossing and turning with a bewildered expression on his face. I’m sure he didn’t expect that, not from me at least.

I glanced at my bruised wrist. It had the fingerprints of that devil on it. I rubbed it carefully with my other hand. I cringed. It was burning like hell. Ignoring my pain, I proceeded towards him. For the first time I found a trace of terror on his face.

“I don’t know what people ‘like me’ deserve but I’m sure people ‘like you’ deserve only this.” He was still moaning, when I parted his legs one by one with my right leg and gave the ultimate kick to his groin. He hollered with pain, cursing me under his breath. He was now helpless.

“You think I’m like another weak, gay guy who will just roll over and play dead, right? But let me get this through to your homophobe head Mr. Arrogant, I-am-not-one-of-them. If you ever try to carry out a stunt like that with me again or with anyone else in my presence, I promise I will make you regret it.” I admonished him in the most standoffish manner, still rubbing my aching wrist.

“GO TO HELL.” He shouted with a hint of pain in his voice, looking at me accusingly.

“You know what; every place witnessing your presence is hell for me, so technically I’m already in hell.” I smirked, even in my pain. He was looking at me like if it would have been in his hands, he would have killed me right there, but fortunately for me, there was nothing else in his hands except his wounded manhood…ouchhh. I gave him a last glance to give my regards, “Bye Mr. Arrogant, have the worst night.” With that, I made my way to my home leaving him there alone.

“I hate you!” He yelled behind me.

“Believe me, not as much as I hate you!” I yelled back without turning around.

I locked the main doors and all the windows in the house and checked them twice. Whatever I did out there few minutes ago, was a surprise to me. I always used my words to fight my battles; this was the first time I used my physical strength like that. It’s not I regretted it, but I was not thrilled about the reason for my sudden explosion…my father. When Edward mentioned my father, I lost all my senses. I was hurt when he spoke rubbish about my father, but I shouldn’t have. I hate my father from the core of my heart. What he did to my mom and I, it’s unforgivable and unforgettable. Many times I asked mom about him but she never told me anything except his name…Matthew Rilens. I wish that someday I could meet him and ask him all those questions I wanted to ask for so many years, but I was afraid he would answer my questions…bloody coward.

I peeked out of the window; there wasn’t any sign of Edward or his car. I was still paranoid due to my revolting encounter with that homophobe. I didn’t know what he would do to retaliate. ‘I can’t be scared. I have to be strong.’ I said to myself. I decided to talk about all this to Kev and Carol tomorrow, rather than my mom. I didn’t want to make her worry or embroil her in this matter at all. After composing myself and putting some ice on my bruised wrist, I called my mom to let her know that I had gotten home safely. Then I went to bed.

Thanks to Mr. Arrogant, my good mood was completely destroyed.

‘I hate him, I really do. I’m unable to understand what he wants. I don’t know why but there was something in his deep brown eyes apart from hatred and anger that I was unable to read. Whatever, I don’t want to think about him anymore. I should think about charming Kevin rather than arrogant Edward. I should think about tomorrow.’ After a little discussion with myself, I pulled my attention away from Mr. Arrogant and on to Mr. Charming.

I couldn’t wait for the morning so I could see Kev again. I took deep breaths, smiled and closed my eyes.

At the end of the day, two things I was sure about more than myself: first...I was feeling something for Kev, I didn’t know if it was love or friendship but there was definitely something, which I still have to figure out, and second…I positively hate Edward.

TBC.