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Not made for each other - 23. Till Death Do Us Part

img alt=":thankyou:" src="http://www.gayauthors.org/forums/public/style_emoticons/default/thankyou.gif" title=":thankyou:" /> Lisa for everything. You're a sweetheart :)

Chapter 23: Till Death Do Us Part.

Zune


“No way!”

“Please Zune. Please. I’m begging you.”

“I said no, Kev. There’s no way I could help you guys with this,” I reiterated, looking up at Kev.

“Zune…I…we just can’t go there alone,” Ed whined and I shifted my gaze to him.

“You guys will be with each other there, so technically neither of you will be alone, Ed,” I retorted, rolling my eyes in aggravation.

“We both stand in the same category for Stephen…in the category of ‘A-class-assholes’. Try to understand Zune, he hates us, and that’s why we need you to come with us. We…we can’t do this without you because you…you are sort of proof that Kev and I have changed,” Ed pleaded.

I huffed. I raked my hands through my hair and plopped down onto the sofa.

Last night, after dropping Stephen and Michelle off at their new house, Carol, Jake, and I revealed to Ed that Stephen’s back. I also called Kev and let him knew the same. Ed and Kev were beyond shocked. Ed took a few minutes to comprehend this news and Kev…well, he kept asking me ‘Was I sure?’ Well, duh. Of course I was sure.

Today Kev arrived at my doorstep early in the morning. Ed took Kev to his room to talk, and now both of them were standing in front of me asking for my help. Both of them wanted me to go with them to Stephen’s house because they didn’t have the balls to face him on their own.

Carol came in from out of nowhere and threw her body to my left…I mean, she slipped onto the sofa next to me.

“What the hell are these pansies begging for this time?” ‘Carol-the sarcastic-bitch’ mode was on.

Kev gritted his teeth and then put a faux smile on his face. “Carol, darling, I don’t think you are comfortable on that sofa. Why don’t you slip into something a little more comfy, like…a coma?”

Ed and I snickered and Carol seemed pissed. Kev looked proud of his little win as Carol was silent now, but giving him death glares. “Suck it up, bitch.” Kev should have kept quiet.

Carol’s lips curved into a sinister smile. “Sorry hon, but small objects are a choking hazard.”

Ed and I sniggered again. This time Carol was the one on the receiving end of the death glares from Kev.

“Ugly bitch!” Kev cursed.

“Brain-dead asswipe!” And here they go again. As much as I had missed Kev and Carol’s bickering, right now their little ‘love-fight’ was getting on my nerves.

“Shameless cunt!”

“Dimwit fucktard!”

“A nasty creature with a pair of vulgar tits!”

“A filthy swine with a pair of useless hanging balls!”

“At least I have balls, you have to grow them, bitch!” Kev folded his hands against his body and stuck his chin up in self-appreciation. Men and their absurd manhood, highly irritating.

Carol arched her left brow. “Why the hell would I have to grow some useless balls? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you have to toughen up then grow a vagina because a vagina can take a pounding unlike your impotent balls.”

Ed and I were laughing our asses off. Carol winked at Kev with a winning smile and left for the upstairs towards my room. Kev threw a few other insults her way, but Carol didn’t pay him any attention.

As Carol disappeared in my room upstairs, Ed and Kev were back on the topic.

“Zune, please,” Ed requested once again.

I sighed. ‘I better not regret this later,’ I prayed in my mind. “Fine!” I gave in and their pleading faces lit up.

***

Minutes later the three of us headed towards Stephen’s house; it was a few houses down the lane. I could feel Ed and Kev’s nervousness. Every other minute, they were exhaling long, deep breaths from their anxiety.

“Don’t worry, guys. Everything will be fine.” I didn’t sound convincing even to myself. I had no idea how Stephen was going to react seeing these two, two people who he probably hates the most, at his doorstep.

Finally after walking, or more like crawling like a snail, for a minute or two, we were outside Stephen’s house where Carol, Jake, and I dropped him and his cousin last night.

I took a deep breath and rang the doorbell. A few seconds later Stephen opened the door. His hair was tousled. He was in a loose green t-shirt and red pajama pants. He looked at me and smiled slightly. “Hey. Wha…” He stopped in mid-sentence as he looked past me and his eyes fell on Ed and Kev. Stephen swallowed audibly.

“Ed…Kev…” Stephen pronounced their names in a whisper. He darted his glistening eyes to me. I could see anger burning there.

I gathered my courage. “Stephen, we…” Stephen slammed the door shut on our faces before I could utter another word.

“He hates us,” Kev stated in a defeated voice.

“The look in his eyes was beyond hatred,” Ed added in a dazed voice.

“Now what?” Kev asked to no one in particular.

I looked back at Ed and Kev. Their disappointed lost-puppy faces were enough to melt all the fucking icecaps on the mountains. “Don’t worry. I’ll do something,” I assured them.

I knocked on the closed door a bit loudly. “Stephen! I know you are still on the other side of the door. Look, Ed and Kev are here to apologize, to tell you how sorry they are for being complete assholes to you. At least let them explain, at least listen to their side of story, please.” There was no movement audible from the other side. “They know that they have hurt you in the worst way possible. They know what they did to you was horrible. They…they just want to…want to tell you how they wish that they hadn’t been the reason for your pain…how they wish to erase everything bad that had happened to you. Please give them a chance, Stephen. Please listen to them once, please.” There was still no response. We waited for another few minutes, but it was futile.

“I think we should leave, guys. He’ll listen to you when he’s ready. Let’s go,” I suggested and began moving in the opposite direction of the door. After taking a few steps, I looked back; Kev was right behind me, but Ed…he was still standing before the closed door staring at it like it was going to open magically on its own. I walked to him and put my hand on his shoulder. “Let’s go, Ed.”

Ed took a step ahead, placed his right hand against the closed door and leaned towards it a bit. “Steph! Steph, I know you are listening to me.” Edward paused, fidgeted in his place and continued, “I…I…can never understand how you felt when I turned my back on you. I will never know how you felt when I outed you, insulted you in front of the whole school. I can never imagine the pain you might have gone through…alone. It’s impossible for me to know the depth of hatred you have in your heart for me. But believe me, Steph…there was not a single day since you left town when I didn’t miss you, when I didn’t curse myself, when I didn’t remember your disappointed face, your pleading eyes.” Ed took a moment to stabilize his breaking voice. “I was burdened with the beliefs of my father. I never hated you, Steph. I never could. When you told me that you were gay, I knew that there was nothing wrong with being gay, hell, I was…am bisexual. I reacted that way just because I wanted to prove to my father that I hated gays as much as he hated them. I wanted to make him believe that I was his perfect, straight son, and on my way to prove that I had treated you like shit, betrayed our friendship and destroyed everything. I couldn’t support you when you needed your best friend the most. I was so wrong, Steph. I was so damn wrong. Please, Steph, please give me a chance to redeem myself. Slap me, punch me, beat the crap out of me, insult me as much as you want, but just, just talk to me once, please, Steph, please.”

The closed door didn’t budge. Ed let out a hopeless sigh.

“Ed, let’s go.” I tried coaxing him to leave. He nodded stiffly.

The three of us turned around, but before we could take a step further, the door finally opened and a wet-eyed, red-nosed Stephen appeared. He looked at me and then shifted his gaze between Kev and Ed. “Both of you have five minutes.” With that, Stephen left the door wide open and went inside. The three of us looked at each other, and taking that as an invitation to go inside, we silently followed him.

Once we were in the living room, I relaxed a bit; at least Stephen was ready to listen to them. I looked around; Michelle was nowhere in sight. Good.

“You guys have only five minutes, so you better get started now!” Stephen said, staring back and forth between Kev and Ed.

“Apart from what I told you minutes ago…,” Ed began first, taking a step closer to Stephen. “I just want to tell you that you were and will always remain my best friend; no one could ever take your place in my life. I wish I could take everything back but…but I fucking can’t. I know it’s not possible for you to forget everything and forgive me, but at least I want you to know how sorry I am for what I did to you, and I am ready to do anything to redeem myself. You name it and I will do it right away.” Ed finished and blinked rapidly with nervous energy. Stephen’s eyes were piercing into Ed.

“Are you done?” Stephen asked with a stoic face. In response, Ed just nodded slightly.

“Okay then, it’s your turn now.” Stephen gestured towards Kev.

Kev exhaled audibly and moved closer to Stephen, just like Ed did seconds ago, but unlike Ed, he was staring down at the carpet. “I have nothing to say in my defense. I had no reason, like Ed, to treat you like shit. I played with your feelings just for the sake of a stupid bet. I was an idiot. I was immature. I was self-centered. Precisely, I was a dick. But believe me, Stephen, I have changed now. I know I was the sole reason you came out of the closet. I…I tricked you into doing that. I did those horrible things to you, yet you never outed me. You maintained your humanity while I was busy ruining your school life and social life.” Kev lifted his eyes to meet Stephen’s penetrating gaze. “Today when I look back, I can’t believe I did all those awful things to you. But as Edward said, now I’m ready to redeem myself. You name it, and I will do it right away. I won’t ask anything. I will just follow your words.” Kev ended his sincere apology and looked down again.

I knew Ed and Kev meant each and every word, and they took this very seriously. They were both standing there waiting for Stephen’s verdict.

“Are you done?” Stephen asked the same question he asked Ed before.

Kev nodded apprehensively, eyeing Stephen in anticipation.

Stephen took a step closer to both of them. “Your little speeches suggest that you guys are really sorry, am I right?”

Kev and Ed looked at each other and then their eyes moved to Stephen. “When I left town, how many times did you guys try to find me, apologize to me?” Stephen continued, narrowing his eyes. His tone was as sharp as a shining blade. Kev and Ed ducked their heads down because, I guess, they had no answer to that.

“Today when you guys found out that I am back, you conveniently rushed here to say sorry, to apologize, but where the hell was my boyfriend when the whole school was laughing in my face, where was he when I was the new punching bag for the bullies? Where the hell was my best friend when I was heartbroken, when I was looking for a shoulder to cry on? Where the hell were the both of you when I had to leave town, when…when I needed someone…anyone, when I was…I was alone…all alone?” Stephen eyes were red with tears. His left brow was arched a little while his lips were trembling. “Let me guess where the hell you guys were: my boyfriend was laughing his ass off at the expense of my true feelings for him, and celebrating for winning that bet which changed my life, and my best friend…” Stephen sucked in a deep breath while blinking away his tears. “…well, he was willingly joining hands with the gang who were always ready to beat the shit out of me, who never left any opportunity to humiliate me like I was a criminal or something. Both of you were busy making my life a-fucking-living-hell.” Stephen’s piercing words were not enough to define the density of his pain; the pain was clearly visible on his face.

Neither Kev nor Ed said a word. Right now I was hating both of them for what they did to an innocent guy. One’s prank and the other’s hollow beliefs made Stephen’s life hell. “Both of you betrayed me.” Stephen finished talking while shaking his head. He took long strides towards the front door and pulled it wide open. He grasped the edge of the door with both hands and stared at Kev and Ed. “Get lost,” he ordered with gritted teeth.

“Steph—” Ed began, but Stephen cut him off immediately.

“OUT!”

“Please—” Kev tried to say something too but got the same treatment.

“NOW!”

The three of us started to walk towards the front door. Stephen eyed me. “Last night I didn’t get your name.” The three of us halted our steps. Stephen’s expressions seemed gentler. His voice was less hostile.

I introduced myself. “Zune…Zune Williams.”

“Zune, if you want, you can stay, but these two assholes need to leave.” I nodded stiffly.

“Kev, Ed, you guys go wait for me outside. I’ll be out in a minute.” Without any protest they ambled towards the exit, looking down.

Stephen was staring at me and I held his gaze as if there was a competition between us on who would look away first.

“Those two brought you with them; it means you are important to them. Is…is one of them your boyfriend?” Stephen was still standing next to the front door, holding the edge of it, blinking rapidly.

“Yes…no…ahh, it’s complicated.” His eyes didn’t budge from mine. “Kev and I were in a relationship, but then something happened and we broke up, but then we made up and then again broke up, and now we’re working on sorting things out between us,” I answered him honestly.

“Wow. That does sound complicated.” Stephen chuckled. My tensed nerves relaxed a little. He pried further. “And Ed…ward?”

“As I said: it’s complicated. Ed and I used to hate each other, then we became friends, then…then something happened, and our new friendship couldn’t survive that something. A while ago, when I needed someone to believe me, he was among those few people who stood beside me, and now we are friends again.” I smiled.

“Well, it means Kevin is your on-and-off-again boyfriend, and Edward is your friend.” It sounded more like a statement rather than a question.

“You could say that.”

“Isn’t it ironic? Two people who have a bitter history with me are now part of your life.” He laughed softly, tilting his head back a little. “Honestly, in some twisted way, I’m jealous of you, Zune.”

“I understand.” I really meant that.

“I hope things don’t turn out ugly this time.”

“I’m sure they won’t.”

He nodded, pressing his lips together.

“Stephen, I think you should—” Stephen cut me off.

“If you’re gonna say something related to Kevin and Edward, just don’t.” He shook his head. That enmity was back in his voice, in his demeanor.

“They’re not the same people you once knew.”

“Zune, now even I’m not that same person anymore.”

I sighed heavily and stared down at the carpet. Then all of a sudden, a bright idea struck in my genius mind. I lifted my eyes to look at him. “Okay, fine. You don’t want to forgive Kev and Ed or even talk about them, then I won’t say a word related to them, but that doesn’t mean we can’t talk or be friends, right?” I cocked my head to the left and waited for him to say something. I knew he was probably weighing everything I said in his head.

“I don’t know, Zune. I mean, our life is already damn complicated; let’s not complicate it further.”

“Who said us being friends would complicate our life? Maybe it could un-complicate some things.” My voice sounded more insisting than I wanted it to be. Stephen was quiet, probably considering what I just said. “Next month is Jake’s birthday.”

“Jake?”

“The other guy with me in the car last night was Jake; he’s one of my closest friends. Next month is his birthday, and I want you and Michelle to come with us to celebrate.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Zune, because I’m sure Edward and Kevin will be there and I don’t want to see them.”

“I promise I won’t stop you from insulting them or ignoring them, but I just want you to be there.” I was being persistent.

“Why do you even want me there?”

“You know, Stephen, the only thing I have learnt in my life so far is that the only way to move on in your life is to let go of your past; holding grudges never does anyone any good. In some strange way, I understand your frustration and your anger towards Ed and Kev, but I’m sure you don’t actually hate them. You can’t hate them.”

“And what makes you so sure about that?”

“Because these complex feelings don’t work that way.”

Stephen instantly looked away. “So basically, you want me there to give them another chance to apologize.”

“Honestly, yeah.”

“It won’t be easy for any of us, Zune.” There was a hidden fear in his voice.

“Nothing’s easy, Stephen.”

Stephen smiled lightly. “You are good for them, Zune.” I smiled back. “Okay, I can’t promise anything, but I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I want.” My smile widened.

After exchanging our numbers and a cordial nod, I walked out of his house. Ed and Kev were waiting for me outside. I told them that I had invited Stephen for Jake’s birthday celebration, but neither of them reacted. The look of remorse and sorrow was still lingering on their faces.

“We don’t deserve his forgiveness,” Kev spoke while we headed towards home.

“We are shit.” Ed joined the ‘speech-of-losers’.

Kev raked his hands through his hair. “He was right. We never even tried to find out where he was or how he was doing.”

Ed kicked a pebble while shoving his hands in the front pocket of his jeans. “We are nothing but freaking opportunists.”

“Stop talking like a bunch of losers,” I chided looking back and forth between them. They didn’t utter a word after that. “Look, if Stephen decides to show up on Jake’s birthday then you guys could have a chance to at least begin mending things with him. If he insults you, bear it. If he curses you, then hear it. If he ignores you, then respect his decision and even if he kicks you in your guts, which you guys truly deserve, then suffer silently because I don’t know whether you guys earned his forgiveness or not, but I know one thing for sure: Stephen deserves to insult you, curse you, ignore you, or even kick both of you in your guts.” I stopped talking, eyeing them one by one.

“You are right.” My point got through Kev’s thick skull first. Finally.

“Yeah. Stephen deserves that.” Ed’s slow mind also grasped what I was saying. “He has every right to humiliate us in any way he finds suitable.”

“Stephen needs to let his growing frustration and anger out because only after that, will it be possible for him to think beyond his broken heart and betrayed feelings,” I explained further and they nodded. I wished things would work out among the three of them, and hopefully Stephen’s arrival on Jake’s birthday would be the first attempt in that direction.

As we reached outside my house, Kev headed towards his house while Ed and I ambled inside. When we walked into the kitchen, I gasped. I found Becca and Ron in the kitchen and the whole room was a mess. There was flour all over the kitchen counter, a few broken eggs were scattered around the bowl which Ron was haphazardly whisking something in, and Becca was right beside him in her wheelchair, helplessly trying to instruct him on something.

“What the hell is going on in here?!” I asked, flabbergasted.

Ron lifted his eyes to look at me and a radiant smile spread across his flour-smudged face. “Oh hi, Zune,” he responded amiably.

“Ron, why the hell does it seem like an apocalypse just ravaged my kitchen?” I asked in utter annoyance. Ron just blushed in response. What the hell?!

“Ron is learning to how to bake a cake so he could bake one…on Jake’s birthday,” Becca answered for Ron.

Ed chuckled and I sighed. Every day Ron unsuccessfully tries something new to woo Jake, and it would be a lie to say it’s not working. It looked like Jake had begun to melt the way he appreciates Ron’s every disastrous attempt to impress him.

“Now just add sugar, and follow the recipe written in the book I gave you earlier,” Becca instructed him, wheeling herself out of the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” Ron asked worriedly, like Becca was leaving him alone in the middle of a world war.

“Ron, I’m going to be late for work. Just add sugar and follow the recipe. You will be fine.”

“Okay. Thanks Rebecca.”

Becca smiled and left to get ready for work while Ron again concentrated on baking the cake for his sweetheart.

A few minutes later Ed left with Becca so he could drop her off at work, and I ran upstairs to my room where Carol and Jake were sprawled all over the bed. Carol practically lived here. She usually just left for her house at night to sleep, but some nights she didn’t even bother leaving at all.

As I entered the room both of them bombarded me with numerous questions about what happened at Stephen’s place. I told them the whole story, including the fact that I invited him to Jake’s birthday celebration.

“Do you think he’ll come?” Jake asked, sitting on my bed Indian-style. Soon, Carol followed suit. I took a chair and sat down facing them.

“I think he will come,” I replied.

“I hope if Stephen decides to show up, he doesn’t drag his bitchy cousin along with him.” Carol huffed.

“She has a name…a beautiful name.” Our good boy Jake instantly stood up in Michelle’s defense.

“Her name is as ugly as herself,” Carol retorted in irritation, looking away from Jake.

“Bitch,” Jake muttered under his breath.

“I heard that, little mouse.”

“I intended for you to hear that, bitch.”

“Will you two stop?” I interrupted their bantering, and both of them stared at me.

“Tell him to stop taking her side. He’s my friend, not hers.” A warning was clearly audible through Carol’s words.

“Tell her to stop insulting people for no apparent reason.” Jake backfired.

“No apparent reason! She didn’t let me have that strawberry pastry.” Jake and I gave her an ‘are-you-kidding-me’ look, but Carol was immune to those looks. Bitch.

I shifted my gaze to Jake. “Well, now that you mentioned pastry, I just remembered that your lover-boy is downstairs.”

“Ron is here?!” Jake asked in an incredulous voice.

“Yes. In the kitchen.” I arched my left brow suggestively.

“What the hell is that moron doing in the kitchen?” Carol still hated Ron for hurting Jake. Jake gave her a dirty look, obviously not approving of Carol calling Ron a moron. “What? He is a moron.”

“You said yourself that he was changing back to the old Ron.” I defended Ron. Jake gave me a gratified smile. “Yesterday you informed us that according to ‘your inside sources’, since Jake’s return, Ron has not slept with anyone; he is totally a monogamist. He is not seeing anyone else. And we all know Ron is doing his best to redeem himself so he can sweep Jake off his feet all over again.”

Carol narrowed her eyes. “I agree he’s changed, but it doesn’t mean I forgave him for what he did to Jake.”

“Doesn’t matter as long as I forgive him,” Jake interjected with a sarcastic smile.

“Oh really. I—”

Before another round of drama began, I cut off Carol. “Guys, we were talking about Ron being in the kitchen, remember?”

“Oh yes. What the hell is that mo…” Carol was about to say moron again, but Jake shot daggers in her direction with his eyes. “…I mean, what the hell is Ron is doing in the kitchen?” Carol chose correct words this time, and Jake’s face relaxed a bit.

“He might be learning to bake a cake so he could bake one on Jake’s birthday,” I divulged with a teasing smile.

Jake just blushed and Carol rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“How mushy?” Carol chided.

“It’s called sweet and romantic, bitch,” Jake stated with an edge in his tone.

“Yeah, sure. I’m sure that like his previous sweet and romantic acts, this will again be a failure, little mouse.” Another round of stupid bickering. Not again.

***

The three of us came downstairs after having numerous foolish arguments. And soon, Ron appeared from the kitchen with a beautiful cake on a plate in his right hand, while carrying a knife in the other. Jake and Ron were both smiling bashfully, gazing at each other. Several smudges of flour were even incapable of hiding on Ron’s grinning face.

The three of us went to the sofa. Ron carefully placed the cake in the middle of the coffee table in front of us.

“It’s beautiful, Ron.” Jake praised Ron, glancing up at him. For a few minutes both of them held each other’s gaze. The way they were staring at each other, I had no doubt that they were made for each other. Many hurdles came their way, and they faced many obstacles, but now it was time for them to finally get back together.

Ron handed him the knife. Jake gently sliced a small piece of cake, peeked in Ron’s direction, and tasted the cake. As soon as Jake took a bite, he coughed.

“What happened?” Ron asked, instantly kneeling beside Jake.

“Nothing. I’m fine. This…this cake is amazingly delicious.” Jake assured Ron, and continued to eat the cake. Ron’s tense face loosened up a bit, but by the tension lines formed on Jake’s forehead, I knew something was wrong. I cut a piece for myself, and as I put the cake on my tongue I knew what was wrong. Ron added salt instead of sugar in the cake’s batter. Poor Jake. Jake pleaded with me with his eyes to not reveal that information. I nodded and forcefully gulped down the rest of the piece, putting a smile on my face.

“Okay, now I’ll try it,” Carol announced and cut a piece for herself.

Jake and I shared a panicked look.

“This whole cake is for me. I won’t share it with anyone,” Jake declared rather loudly.

Carol raised her brows in suspicion. “No, I’ll definitely have it.” Royal bitch.

After some unnecessary dramatic pauses, Carol finally took a few bites of the cake, and immediately her face contorted. Jake and I silently begged her to keep her mouth shut and swallow down the cake. She stared us in disbelief but finished the piece nonetheless. Jake smiled in gratitude and I nodded.

“Yeah, they are right. This cake is damn good,” Carol emitted with gritted teeth.

Ron turned his gaze to the three of us and then suddenly took the residual piece from Jake’s hand and ate it. He spat it out right away and stood up. “This is horrible! How could any of you put that on your tongue?!”

“It’s not…not that bad.” Jake tried to console him.

“Bad? This is shit!” Disappointment was written all over Ron’s face. He exhaled with a grim look on his face. “I can’t do anything right for you. Whenever I try to do something to make you happy I…I just fail.”

“This is just a cake, Ron.” Jake attempted to comfort him again.

Ron’s face was covered in hopelessness and defeat. “I always disappoint you. I can’t make you happy.”

Jake stood up and began rubbing off smudges of flour from Ron’s face with his hand. A radiant smile lit up Jake’s face. “Your mere presence around me is enough to make me happy, Ron. This cake doesn’t matter, but your will to bake a cake for me does.”

A wide smile spread over Ron’s sad face. “You always say the best things.” The lovebirds chuckled, and Ron pulled Jake into a tight hug.

“This over-sappiness is going to make me puke,” Carol whispered to me. I shushed her and she snorted.

After some lovey-dovey talk, Ron left with a promise to return with another surprise before Jake’s birthday. I was a bit apprehensive about that.

“God must save us,” Carol mumbled and Jake and I glared at her. Thankfully, she got the clue and shut up.

For the next few days everything was normal and smooth. Things were great. We all were comfortably settled into a daily routine.

Becca and Jake were responsible for preparing breakfast and cooking dinner was Ed’s and my responsibility. Mom took care of paying the bills. The remaining household chores were on Becca and Jake’s to-do-list, while grocery shopping was Ed’s and my duty.

Kev, Carol, and Ron visited us almost every day. Kev was still trying to convince me to get back with him, but I was in no hurry. I was sure soon everything would be idyllic in Jake and Ron’s lives though. Carol was, as usual, being herself: the snarky bitch, but behind those taunting words were nothing but pure concern and love for all of us. Carol and Kev finally mended their issues, and unbelievably, she had also begun to behave a tad more civil with Ron.

Becca and Mom’s work was going well. Recently Becca got a pay raise, which we all celebrated with ice cream. Becca had come a long way since I first met her. Now whenever I look at her, I see an independent woman and a strong mother, rather than a helpless wife and a defeated mother.

Matt again tried to talk to Mom, but as usual she ignored him. I don’t blame her. Matt hurt Mom badly, and this time it would not be easy for her to forgive him and move ahead.

Stephen called me yesterday letting me know that he would come to our house on Jake’s birthday, along with his cousin Michelle. Carol was not exactly happy with the last piece of news, but she had no choice but to suck it up.

The day after Jake’s birthday would be my first day at college. I would be a year behind my friends, but at least we all would be at the same college.

Things were changing and shaping up well for us. All in all, everything was nearly perfect, but I forgot that perfection is nothing but a myth.

***

“Please help me, guys!” Ron was standing in front of Carol and me, literally clasping his hands together while begging for help.

“Stop acting weird, weirdo, and spit out something useful.” Yeah, that was Carol.

“Actually, after that cake episode—”

“You mean after that cake-disaster-episode,” Carol interjected with her snide remark.

“Carol!” I warned her to shut her mouth and luckily she complied. “Okay, Ron, tell us what you need our help with.”

Carol snickered and I glared at her. “Okay fine. No more bitchiness…for now.” Carol and I shifted our gaze to Ron who was continuously fidgeting in his place.

“Speak up, Ron,” I insisted.

“Actually, I want to plan a surprise for Jake. For that I need yours and Jake’s room empty for a few hours.”

“How many hours exactly?” I pried further.

“At least three hours.” He was looking at us with pleading eyes, seeking our consent.

“By the way, what is the surprise?” I asked.

“I want Jake to be the first one to know—”

“I get it. Carol and I will drag Jake outside for three hours.”

“I hope this does not turn out to be another disaster.” I had no idea why Carol couldn’t shut her big mouth. Her sardonic words might be a huge let down for Ron and his morale.

“I…I’ll try my best—”

“Don’t mind this bitch, Ron. I’m sure your surprise will be great,” I assured him while scowling at Carol. To retaliate she flipped me the bird. Bitch.

Jake was out with Ed to pick Becca up from work. Carol and I promised Ron that as soon as he returned we would take him out somewhere. Ron thanked us. I smiled politely while Carol frowned.

As per our promise, when Jake came back, Carol and I took him out for shopping. We wandered through many shops aimlessly in order to spend the requisite time out.

After spending three futile hours at the mall, when we got back home and plopped down on the sofa, we saw Ron in the kitchen with Ed. Ron smiled widely and secretly gave us a thumbs-up to let us know that his surprise was ready in the room upstairs. Carol and I started thinking about the ways we could coax Jake to our room without creating any suspicion in his mind.

“Jake, I need that book you were reading yesterday,” Carol demanded imposing a fake smile on her face.

“But you hate reading.” Jake pointed out, creasing his brows together in confusion.

“I…I have recently developed a liking for reading fiction.”

“And when did that happen?” I figured that Jake knew that something was fishy.

“Can’t you simply get that book from upstairs for me instead of interrogating me like a detective?” Carol snapped, and it worked.

“Geez! Fine.” Jake held his hands up in the air, palms out, in defeat and went upstairs. Carol and I high-fived each other and smirked like idiots.

Within seconds we heard Jake come out of the room coughing badly. “What the…what the hell?!” He muttered in between coughs. Something was definitely not right upstairs.

Carol and I glanced at each other. She shook her head indicating that Ron’s surprise was again a flop show. Nonetheless, we ran upstairs. Ron and Ed were right behind us. As soon as I entered the room, I gaped and began coughing like Jake. Carol, Ron, and Ed’s condition was no better.

The whole room was filled with lit candles and smoke, as the door was closed, and there weren’t any windows open. Keeping my eyes open was becoming difficult.

“I knew it!” Carol hollered while running towards the windows to open them. “I knew it would be nothing but another disaster.” We hastily started blowing out the candles. It took us more than thirty minutes to clear the room from those countless candles and choking smoke.

After taking care of Ron’s surprise, the five of us headed downstairs towards the living room. Carol, Ed, and I were seated on the sofa while across the coffee table Ron slipped out of his black jacket and flung it on the floor in frustration; Jake was trying to comfort him.

Ron was embarrassed, but Jake was sympathetic.

“It was supposed to be romantic. It was supposed to be something like a fond memory. It was supposed to make you happy,” Ron was babbling, and shaking his head. He was rocking back and forth in agitation.

“Ron, it’s—” Jake began, but all of a sudden Ron stood up and cut him off.

“I don’t deserve a person like you in my life, Jake.” Ron’s eyes were glistening with tears. “You are just too perfect for me Jake, and I…” His voice was trembling now. “I…I’m the definition of imperfection.” He turned around and was out the door before anyone could stop him.

Jake picked up Ron’s jacket from the floor and left it on the sofa before trudging towards the stairs, shoulders hunched, head down.

For the rest of the day Jake was quiet and. Mom and Becca also tried to talk to him, but he didn’t say much. We all knew he was going through a rush of emotions, so we decided to leave him alone for a while.

***

A Few Weeks Later

“Have you told Steph about Jake’s birthday surprise?” Ed asked while putting water in the pot to boil. Tonight we were making Italian spaghetti for dinner, along with baked potatoes and cabbage salad.

I just nodded while adding olive oil to another pot and putting it on the free burner.

There was just a week before Jake’s birthday. Ron, Ed, Kev, Carol, and I decided to surprise him with a birthday party at midnight. Everything was planned. I even called Stephen to inform him about Jake’s birthday surprise. He and Michelle agreed to be a part of it.

Mom and Becca would not be able to join us; Becca left to see her mother yesterday, and was planning to stay there for at least two weeks, and Mom had to work the night shift on Jake’s birthday. So this time the seven of us were planning to celebrate Jake’s birthday on our own. We all wanted to make it as special as we could.

“He agreed to our surprise plan.” I added ground beef in the oil and sautéed it under a low heat.

“He did?” he asked in surprise as he began chopping the onions.

“Why are you so surprised?” I threw some bell peppers and mushrooms in the pot and stirred.

“Because he hates Kev and me, and he knows that we will be here at the party.” Ed finished with the onions and put them aside for me to add later.

“I told him that none of us would force him to talk to you or Kev, nor would we stop him from beating the crap out of the two of you.” I couldn’t stop my chuckle.

“Wow! Isn’t it amazing?” His tone was dribbling with sarcasm.

“Stop complaining as if the both of you don’t deserve that. Look on the brighter side; there’s still a possibility of him forgiving you guys if he’s around you two.” When the ingredients in the pot were lightly browned, I added the chopped onions to the mix.

Ed exhaled audibly. “I can’t deny that.” In the other pot, the water started boiling. Ed added olive oil, salt, and spaghetti noodles to the boiling water. “How’s Jake doing?” He then began to dice a few cloves of garlic.

“As per our plan, Ron is still not talking to Jake, and it is eating Jake alive. Even Ron is dying to talk to him; if Carol hadn’t threatened to castrate him, he would have ruined the whole thing.” Ed and I chuckled. We all thought that Jake needed some time without Ron so he could sort his thoughts out. We knew Jake loved Ron and was ready to be with him again, but Jake needed to realize that on his own. We had planned that Ron would not have any contact with Jake before his birthday.

Suddenly, my phone buzzed. It was a message from Kev.

M outside…waiting 4 u.

What the hell was he doing here now? I hurriedly drained out the grease out of the pot, and then added the diced garlic, tomato sauce, and spices into the mix. “Ed, can you take over from here?” I asked while taking off my apron. “Actually, Kev is waiting for me outside.”

“Yeah sure.” He smiled and I nodded while making my way out of the kitchen.

It was dark outside and a bit cold. Kev was leaning against his car on the far edge of the road. I walked to him with long strides while rubbing my hands to warm them up.

“Hey,” I greeted.

“Hey.”

“What happened?” I asked staring at his anxious face.

“Actually, I needed to talk to you.” Kev was shuffling his feet and ignoring my gaze. He was definitely nervous.

“What is it, Kev?”

He took a deep breath and finally looked up at me. “I love you, Zune.”

“I know that, Kev. Is that the reason you called me outside?” I was sure there was more.

“I want us to be together…again.” Here we go again.

“Kev, I have already told you I need time—”

“But why?”

“What do you mean why? I need time to get over the shit that happened between us.”

“It’s killing me to be this close to you but still not be able to be with you.” Kev threw his hands in the air in frustration.

I sighed. “Kev, I’m not ready for this right now.”

“Then, when will you be?”

“Honestly, I have no clue.”

“Do you love me?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“A simple one. Do you love me, Zune? Because if you do, then I’m ready to wait for you as long as you want.”

“It’s getting colder. I’m heading inside.” I turned around to leave, but Kev grabbed my hand. I heaved another sigh. I looked back. “Let me go, Kev.”

“Just answer my question and I promise I’ll let you go, Zune. Do you still love me?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. I really don’t know, Kev.” All of a sudden I was feeling guilty. The disappointment and defeat in his eyes was tormenting my conscience.

“Fine then. Until you are sure of your feelings for me, I’ll wait for you…right here.”

“Exactly what do you mean by ‘right here’?”

“I’ll be waiting for your reply right here, in my car, outside your house. I’m not moving from here until I get my answer.”

“You’re being insane!” I accused.

“You’re being stubborn!” he retorted.

“What you’re doing is blackmailing me!”

“You leave me with no choice!”

“Fine! Do what you want!” I yanked my hand away from his grasp and walked briskly until I was in the warm confines of my house. I closed the door behind me and stood leaning against it.

After a few deep breaths I walked in the kitchen to help Ed.

“Can you please slice these potatoes?” Ed pushed the knife and a few potatoes towards me as I approached the kitchen counter.

I nodded, washed my hands and began working on the potatoes. I knew Ed was glancing in my direction every few seconds “What did Kev want?” he asked while pulling out another knife from the knife rack.

My eyes were glued to the potatoes. “An answer to a question.”

“And what was the question?” Ed began chopping cabbage. I sighed in response. “I think you should give him another chance, Zune.”

I was halfway through with the potatoes when I stopped abruptly to look up at him. “Did Kev tell you something about all this?” He just nodded. “So suddenly you and Kev are best buddies or something?” I asked with slight annoyance.

“No. Not best buddies. You could say we are getting along just fine.” I again began working on the potatoes while Ed threw the chopped cabbage into the salad bowl. “I never thought that Kev and I could be friends after what happened between—” Ed stopped himself in time, and then for a few seconds both of us ceased to move. The awkward silence was permeating the kitchen.

I knew what he was about to say. He was talking about that fateful night when I lost my virginity to him, and then after that everything got messed up. I know I should curse that day because that day I broke Kev’s heart and trust, but honestly, I don’t regret what happened between Ed and me, because if that didn’t happen, my first time would have been with Monster; the memory of losing my virginity would have always led me to the fact that I was raped.

Involuntarily I inhaled a sharp breath.

“Since…since Steph is back, Kev and I talk a lot about him. We’re both his culprits, so we have to stick together if we seek his forgiveness.” Ed broke the uncomfortable silence. I nodded in understanding.

After another few minutes in silence, I turned to my left to put the sliced potatoes in the microwave. “Kev is still outside in his car, and he said he won’t leave until I give him an answer to whether I still love him or not.” Ed didn’t say anything in response for a few moments, but finally repeated his words: “I think you should give him another chance, Zune.” I heard Ed pulling out the serving bowls from the cabinets behind me.

“Why?” I asked as I turned around to face him. A flash of anger flared somewhere inside me.

“Because he loves you,” he answered with simple directness while shrugging.

“Well, what about how I feel about him?” I stomped my feet towards him.

“Zune, I understand you’re angry with him because he had made a mistake—”

Mistakes.” I corrected him.

“Okay, fine. Mistakes. He made a few mistakes, but what would you have done if you were in his place?”

“I would have trusted him, the way I expected him to trust me.”

“Yeah, sure. He would have trusted a guy who had cheated on him with his sworn enemy.”

I couldn’t believe he just said that. We have never talked about this topic. I was getting agitated with each passing moment. Absentmindedly, I took another step towards him. “Yes, I cheated on him, but I told him about it myself.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that you cheated on him.”

“Stop talking like you have nothing to do with this whole messed up situation because perhaps, you forgot that you were the guy with whom I cheated on Kev with.”

“I’m not the one who was in a relationship with Kev, you were.” In that exact moment his eyes flickered to my lips and then back to my eyes. “And…and whatever happened that night was a…” He blinked rapidly and finally averted his gaze from my face. “…was a mistake.”

I don’t know why, but that ‘mistake’ word stung. In a fraction of a second, I was miffed. “That may have been a mistake for you, but for me it was a blessing in disguise.” Ed looked at me in surprise. “Because if it hadn’t happened that night with you, every time I thought about my first time, I would be reminded of the fact that I was raped; I would be reminded of Monster’s disgusting face; I…I’d be reminded of all the pain I went through.” I had no idea when tears began to leave the confines of my eyes. I was silently crying while still staring at Ed.

Ed swallowed audibly and took a step towards me. He raised his hand to wipe my tears off my face. I jerked his hand away and stormed out of the kitchen.

***

Dinner was a quiet event. Nothing much happened at the dining table. After dinner, Mom went to her room. Ed tried to talk to me, but I fled to my room.

Carol called Matt to let him know she was spending the night. Later, the three of us, Carol, Jake, and I, headed towards the terrace while I told them what happened with Kev.

The three of us were resting our elbows on the iron railing at the edge of the terrace. Jake was standing in between Carol and me. There was a thick tension in the air. The silence made the atmosphere more eerie.

I saw that Kev’s car was still parked on the far end of the road, and he was seated in the driver’s seat, leaning back.

Finally, Carol disrupted the disturbing silence. “Ron really loves you, Jake.” Her statement made Jake and me stare at her in utter disbelief. “Stop staring at me like I have just grown a pair of balls on my head.” Carol surely knew how to make us smile.

“I thought you didn’t like Ron.” I arched my brows in suspicion.

Carol shifted her gaze to Jake. “I still don’t like him but…but I can’t deny that that weirdo loves my little mouse.”

“So what are you suggesting?” I asked.

She sighed. “Ron loves Jake. Jake loves Ron. There isn’t much left to say. They should get back together again.”

“Jake?” I nudged Jake’s elbow to hear his thoughts because we were talking about him, after all.

“I don’t know guys.” It was Jake’s only reaction.

“Come on, Jake. What’s stopping you?” I asked.

He stared at me with a straight face then shifted his gaze down towards Kev’s car. “What’s stopping you from getting back with Kev?” I was speechless. “That’s what I thought.”

“Both of you are confused pricks. Ron loves you, Jake, and Kev loves you, Zune. I know they made a lot of mistakes, but it’s time to forgive them and move ahead. And, if you can’t forgive them then let them know about it, so at least they can move ahead with their lives.” Carol’s words were harsh but true.

Jake and I looked at each other. I knew we were feeling the same guilt in this moment. None of us said anything else after that, and a few moments later we decided to call it a night and go to bed.

***

I couldn’t sleep. My mind was occupied with Kev. Many times I rolled out of my bed, being careful enough not to wake Jake who was sleeping right beside me, and peeked out the window hoping that Kev wouldn’t be there in his car, but every time I looked, I saw his car. ‘What the hell should I do?’ I whispered to myself.

“You should listen to your heart…” I looked back. It was Jake. That night there was a full moon, so I could see that he had propped himself up on his elbow on the bed. I thought he was asleep, but clearly I was wrong.

“Because it never betrays you.” Carol completed for Jake, turning on her side in her sleeping bag on the floor. It seemed like déjà vu. I remembered that Carol, Jake, and I had this conversation before, when Kev came to meet me, asking to give our relationship another chance after I first found out what he did to Stephen. At that time I knew that I was irrevocably in love with Kev, I knew what I wanted, but right now everything seemed clouded.

“I thought you guys were asleep,” I quipped. I was still standing at the window.

Jake switched on the lights. “Far from it.”

Carol slipped out of her sleeping bag to join Jake on the bed. She put her hand around Jake’s shoulder. “What happened to my little mouse?”

Jake stared at Carol and then shifted his gaze to me. “I…I think it’s time to accept the obvious.” Carol and I shared a knowing look. “I…I love Ron. I always have. We made mistakes, we fought, but…but I still love him, and I will probably always love him. I can never feel for anyone else the way I feel about him. And I’m sure that he’s changed for good now, that he loves me.”

Carol let out a sigh of relief. “About time.”

Jake and I chuckled. Jake kissed Carol’s cheek. “You are the best, Carol.”

“Tell me something new.” Carol-the bragging-queen.

“So what now?” I asked Jake, raising my brows.

“I want to tell him about it. I want to hug him…kiss him.” Jake seemed to fall into a haze.

“Snap out of it, little mouse.” Carol disrupted Jake’s reverie. “Ron is out of town for a few days. He’ll be back soon but not until after your birthday, and then you can hug him and kiss him as much as you want.” I must say Carol was a damn fine liar.

“How do you know?” Jake asked in suspicion.

“Kev told me,” she lied again.

“But I can call him, right?” Jake asked out of desperation.

“No!”

“No!”

Carol and I blurted simultaneously and then exchanged a sheepish look.

“But why?” Jake was definitely confused, and I really couldn’t blame him.

“Because this is not a thing you want to tell him on the phone. Don’t you want to see his face when you tell him that all his disasters and stupid surprises have finally paid off?” Carol joked, and Jake and I chuckled.

“You are right,” Jake agreed. “I guess I can wait a while longer.”

“What about you, Zune?” Jake asked me.

“What about me?”

“I have straightened out my feelings. It’s time for you to do the same.” Jake pointed out.

“Jake is right, Zune. We’re not saying to fall into a relationship with Kev right away, but at least answer him honestly whether you still love him or not, because if you don’t, then let him go.” Carol gave me her honest advice.

I nodded, looked out towards Kev’s car, and then stared at Jake and Carol. “You guys are right.” With that, I decided to answer Kev’s question. I draped a black shawl around me and began walking out of the room.

“Just do the right thing, Zune.” I heard Carol say behind me.

“I will,” I assured her without looking back.

Once I was out of the room, I closed the door behind me.

The flashbacks of the time Kev and I spent together began to swamp my mind: all the golden moments we spent together. How Kev saved me from Ed’s wrath when I first saw him. Within hours of our first meeting, how he confessed that he loved me. How he behaved like a child over my stupid rules and regulations.

I was on the stairs now, but my mind was still hung in the past: How broken he was when I cheated on him. How vulnerable he was when he pleaded to give us another chance after I found out about Stephen.

I opened the front door and stepped out. The cold air whipped my face and I hugged myself with my shivering hands.

And then I remembered the look of disbelief in Kev’s eyes when I came back from that hellhole and accused Daryl of selling me to Ma’am. He never tried to talk to me or see me. In his eyes I was wrong, and without trusting me to tell the truth, he decided to stand against me.

I halted for a moment then began ambling in the direction of his car. Both of us made mistakes and hurt each other. We never were together when we needed each other the most. Were we made for each other? Well, at the moment the real question was whether I still loved Kev?

If, a few weeks before, someone would have asked me the same question, then I would have answered in favor of Kev in a heartbeat, but at the moment I was not so sure. I was just a few steps away from Kev’s car. I stopped again and closed my eyes and began to replay every moment I spent with Kev in my mind, and after a few seconds my eyes snapped open.

Now I was sure about my answer to Kev’s question. I bridged the gap to Kev’s car and knocked on the driver’s side window. My sudden knock yanked him out of his sleep, and he looked around in a panic. He seemed relieved once his eyes landed on me. I indicated for him to open the passenger side door, and he hastily unlocked it. I came around and slipped inside the car.

Kev was staring at me with hope in his eyes, and I was gazing ahead. We sat there in complete silence for some long moments.

“So?” Kev began.

“I’m here to answer your question,” I said.

“I’m all ears.” His voice was filled with hope and excitement.

I shifted my gaze to him. “Kev, we never know the exact moment when we fall in love, but we always remember the moment we fall out of it.” I paused and took a deep breath. “When I came back from that hellhole expecting you to be with me, on my side, you practically called me a liar; in that instant I fell out of love. After that, there was just the thought that remained in my mind about loving you, but in reality, I was not in love with you…not anymore.” I heard Kev swallow. His breaths came out in short pants. “Do I think about you when you’re not around? Does my heart dread the feeling of you not being my boyfriend? Does your single wink still cause me to blush? Does the mere thought of you still make my heart go crazy? Do I miss us? Am…Am I still in love with you?” I sighed. “The answer to all of those questions is no, Kev. Whenever I…I picture us together, I don’t get the feeling that we are right for each other. I’m just not able to feel the same way about you that I used to feel before this whole Daryl debacle. I—”

“Is there someone else?”

“No.No.No. No.” My reply was rather quick. “There is no one.”

“Then what is the problem? Can’t you give us another chance?”

“I can’t, Kev, because…because I don’t love you anymore. I know I sound harsh, but it is good this way for both of us. We… we’re not made for each other.”

“Zune, I know I hurt you. I messed up big time, but I’m sorry for that.”

“I know you are sorry, Kev, and I have already forgiven you for everything, but…but…”

“…we can’t be together,” Kev completed for me.

“No, we can’t.”

I knew this was hard for him, hell, it was hard for me, but I had to be honest because this time I didn’t want to hurt him further.

“What am I supposed to do now? I…I don’t know how to deal with this…this fact that the person I thought was the love of my life is not in love with me.”

“I’m sorry, Kev, but I just can’t lead you on. I’m really sorry.”

“So this is it then. Just like that, we’re over?”

“Kev, maybe I’m not in love with you, but I love you as a friend. You were my first love, and you’ll always hold a special place in my heart, but…,” I trailed off hoping he would get the hint.

“Zune, I’m…I’m sure there’s something I could do to bring us together again.” The helplessness in his voice almost made me melt, but this time I was not going to make a wrong decision based on my emotions. I had to be strong.

I shook my head, feeling guilty of breaking his heart, but I hope I can soon bury that feeling deep down in some unknown corner of my conscience.

“I…I love you, Zune,” he confessed in a trembling voice as if ready to break down any moment.

This rush of emotions watered my eyes too. I leaned closer and lightly kissed his cheek. “Bye, Kev.”

With that I climbed out of the car and began to walk briskly towards the house. One thing was sure: in no way did I regret my decision, but I was still a bit angry with myself for hurting Kev again, though when I did, I felt a sense of freedom. I looked back and saw that Kev’s car was still in the same place. I knew it would take some time for him to accept the reality, but I was positive that he would eventually come around.

As I stepped inside the house I found Ed standing in the middle of the living room. I decided to ignore him for the moment.

I was about to pass by him when his gentle voice made me stop. “I’m sorry for what happened in the kitchen.” I slowly turned around but didn’t say a word. He turned to his side to face me. “I don’t know why I keep hurting the people I care about, but I promise it won’t happen again.”

In that instant I voiced one of the lines Nine told me once: “Hearts and promises are meant to be broken.”

“I don’t think so.”

“Don’t challenge the obvious fact, Ed.”

“I’m sure that’s not an obvious fact, Zune. People are capable—”

I cut him off, piercing him with my intense gaze and equally sharp tone. “Open up your eyes, Mr. Edward Woodsworth, and then you’ll know the trueness of my words. Didn’t our fathers made promises to our mothers? And see where those hollow promises got our mothers? They didn’t only break their promises, but they also broke their hearts and left them with a lifetime wound which would never heal.” I uttered all that in a mere second. I didn’t know why I was angry all of a sudden. It was probably from the guilt of breaking Kev’s heart, or it was the result of Ed’s and my Cold War in the kitchen earlier.

Ed seemed surprised with my sudden outburst. “What happened, Zune? Is everything alright?”

“Yes. Everything is alright…except that I just broke the promises I made to Kev, and coincidently, I also happened to break his heart at the same time.” I sighed and ducked my head down.

Ed took a cautious step towards me. “What…what happened, Zune?”

I looked up to meet his gaze. “I just told Kev that I…I don’t love him.”

Ed kept quiet for a minute like he was figuring out something very complex. “But why?” What a dumb question.

“Isn’t it obvious? I don’t love him that’s why.”

“Are you sure?” There was no sympathy or sorrow in his voice.

“Of course I’m sure.” I felt a bit offended by his stupid questions.

“And how did he take it?”

“Not well I guess, but I’m sure he’ll come around.”

“Zune, is there…is there someone else?”

“Oh gosh, what’s with these hundreds of idiotic questions? Kev asked the same question and now you. No, there’s no one else. I told Kev I don’t love him because of the single significant fact that I-don’t-love-him. Is that so hard to get through your thick skulls?”

“No. No. No, it’s not. It’s just…nothing. I’m sorry.” I don’t know why the hell he was smiling like a fool.

“Why the hell are you smiling?” I guessed Ed had lost his mind.

“Oh no. Nothing.” He tried to hide his smile, but the grin was not ready to fade from his face.

“What the hell?!” Ed was still smiling. “Ed, if in the next five seconds you don’t tell me what the hell is going on, then I’m gonna wipe that smile off your ugly face,” I warned him taking a threatening step towards him.

“I’m…I’m just happy,” he finally admitted.

“I don’t believe this! I just broke Kev’s heart and you’re happy?!” The accusation was clearly audible in my voice.

“No, it’s not like that. I…I’m happy that you thought about the pros and cons of the situation, and instead of leading Kev on, you decided to make a hard but right decision. I’m so proud of you.” And in the spur of the moment he hugged me, and then ran upstairs to his room. What the hell had gotten into him? What the hell he was so happy about? That idiot came here to apologize and left grinning like a complete fool. He was definitely going crazy and driving me insane.

I headed to my room, shaking my head. Once I was inside my room, I told Jake and Carol everything that happened with Kev, but I decided to keep the whole Ed’s-behaving-like-a-lunatic part to myself. Jake and Carol asked me the same question which Ed asked earlier: was I sure about Kev, and I gave them the same reply.

For the last time that night I peeked out of the window, and thankfully Kev’s car was no longer outside. I sighed in relief and went to bed.

The next few days were not as bad as I thought they would be. Ed was still unusually and unexpectedly jolly, like he was walking on air, and I was not the only one who noticed that; everyone around us felt the same way. Whenever someone asked him about his over-excited mood, his only response was a wide grin on his happy face.

Jake was still waiting for Ron’s fake return home, and Carol was still threatening Ron to not talk to Jake until his birthday; Ron was dying to see Jake.

***

A Day Before Jake’s Birthday

Yesterday, I reconfirmed with Stephen that he and Michelle were still coming today for Jake’s surprise birthday party. We all had decided to celebrate at midnight. There were still so many things to do.

We had planned that Carol and I would take Jake to the terrace after dinner to keep him occupied, while Ed and Kev would decorate the downstairs of the house and at midnight, Ron would come in as the biggest surprise of the night. Then, we all would celebrate together. I knew it was going to be awesome.

Jake was out with Mom; she dragged him to the mall to purchase some new clothes for him. Carol was at her house but promised to come early to help. Meanwhile, Kev, Ed, and I decided to buy some decorating stuff for tonight, so we went to one of the party supply stores in town.

In the store, I was walking between Kev and Ed, pushing the cart. Kev was lost in his own thoughts, ignoring me. And Ed, well, that constant smile plastered all over his face had begun to piss me off. I acted like I was indifferent to their presence around me. I didn’t let any emotion flash across my face.

With Kev being there, I felt like I was walking on eggshells. I wanted to hug him, console him. I wanted to tell him that it’s okay; he would get over me in time, but I just couldn’t gather the courage to do so.

We were almost done in the store when, from out of nowhere, someone called my name. “Zune!” The three of us looked back, and as I saw the person standing before me I couldn’t stop the smile taking over my face.

“Katie!” I greeted her back. Katie was the girl who used to work at Grey’s Café when Ed and I used to meet before we…before I slept with Ed. Ed had also gave her a nickname, Bubbly, because of her over-enthusiastic nature. She was the same girl who thought that Ed and I were boyfriends, and we never had a chance to sort out that misunderstanding.

She ran to me and crushed me with her hug. “How have you been?” she asked excitedly. Becca had told me that Katie had quit the job three months ago because she had moved to another town.

I pulled back, but I was still smiling. “I’m fine. How are you doing?”

“I’m fine. Everything is going well and—” She stopped in mid-sentence as her eyes fell over Ed. “Hey, Edward! How are you doing?” With that she lunged towards him and hugged him tightly. “I missed you guys so much. I always tell my boyfriend that Edward and Zune make the cutest and most charming couple. Oh my God, I’m such a fangirl!” She chuckled while I felt the color drain from my face.

“Couple?” Kev sounded confused and angry.

Katie shifted her gaze to him. “Yeah, couple. They have been together since they were still in school.” She looked at Ed and me. “Right, guys?”

“Katie, Ed and I are not—” I began to clear up her misconception, but her phone rang before I could utter another word. She picked up the call.

“Hey, babe.” I figured it was her boyfriend. “Yeah, I’ll be there in like fifteen minutes. You won’t believe what happened today.” The zeal in her voice somehow made me happy. She was talking to her boyfriend, but her eyes were flickering between Ed and me. “I met the cutest couple today.” She paused for a few moments. “Yeah, babe, you got that right. Zune and Edward are right in front of me now. I’m so happy to see them and to find out that they’re still together. Isn’t it the greatest thing ever?” I glanced in Kev’s direction, he was fuming and glaring at Katie. “Okay, babe. See you in a bit.”

She hung up. “Sorry, guys, I have to go now. I’m so happy to see both of you. I just hope that whenever we meet again I see you both together as usual.” She hugged Ed and me once again, kissed our cheeks, and left hurriedly, waving goodbye to us.

As soon as Katie left, Kev began with his interrogation. “What the hell did she just say? I knew you slept with him when you and I were still together, but you told me it was a mistake, a onetime thing, and you regretted it. And now, some girl shows up from nowhere and acknowledges both of you as a couple. Am I missing something here?” His accusing tone somehow pissed me off, but I controlled myself.

“It was nothing more than a big misunderstanding, Kev.” I tried to clarify for him.

“A misunderstanding which continued to be a misunderstanding through how many years?” Kev’s derisive tone was testing my patience.

“Yeah, because we never got the time to clear up her misunderstanding about Ed and me being boyfriends,” I explained in a stern voice.

“Yeah, sure. And I should believe that.” His voice was layered with sarcasm, but still I maintained my composure.

“Zune is right, Kev. We just used to show up at Grey’s Café where Katie used to work, and she just assumed that we were…we were boyfriends. Zune and I never got the chance to tell her that she was wrong. That’s it. There is nothing more to it. Believe me,” Ed interjected, and as far as I could read Kev’s face, he looked even more riled up.

“Believe you?! You gotta be kidding me,” Kev scoffed. He was creating a scene in the store by now, and my last bit of patience was wearing thin. “After what—” I cut him off.

“Enough, Kev. I know you are upset, but just because I don’t love you anymore doesn’t give you the right to act all nasty,” I chided, scowling at him.

“I was just…I’m…” Kev sighed in frustration. “I’m…I’m sorry for overreacting,” he apologized in a defeated voice, raking his fingers through his hair. I recognized his perplexed emotions. I knew he was suffering from his heartbreak. He was bound to act stupid and angry. I side-hugged him and felt him stiffen up a bit.

“I’m sorry, Kev. I know you are going through a lot now, but believe me, in the future you’ll thank me.” I tried to cheer him up.

“I will never believe that, but still I’ll try to…to behave.” The ruefulness in his voice was quite upsetting, but unfortunately, there was nothing I could do for him at the moment.

“If it helps, Ed and I were never boyfriends. Katie just misunderstood. There was only one guy I ever loved, and it was you, Kev, only you,” I stated honestly.

“I know. I was just being a jerk.” Kev shrugged.

“Well, you have the right to be a jerk, but could you please postpone your I-being-jerk phase till Jake’s birthday is over?” I asked playfully to lighten up his mood.

“Yeah. Sure,” Kev agreed while forcing a smile on his face and slipping his hands into his jacket pockets.

Kev got a hold of the cart and wheeled it towards the front counter. Ed and I were following him. I glanced at Ed; he seemed to be engrossed in his own thoughts. “What happened?” I asked in a whisper. Ed stopped abruptly and lifted his eyes to meet my gaze but didn’t say anything. “What is it, Ed?”

Ed’s lips twitched up suggesting a smile making its way on his face. “Nothing. I…I was just…I was generally asking that…that, are you…are you sure that…that…ahh…nothing.” He shook his head and brought his gaze to the floor again. “Forget I said anything. Let’s go.” And with that, he moved ahead with long strides, leaving me behind. Lately, Ed had begun to confuse me more than the complex mathematic equations which used to give me severe headaches and horrible nightmares during my school years. I had no clue what had gotten into him.

I brushed off his unusual behavior with a huff and headed towards the front counter where Ed and Kev were waiting for me.

Our ride to home was quiet as the three of us chose to conveniently ignore each other.

***

When Kev, Ed, and I got back home, Carol and Jake were there. Mom had already left for her night shift at the hospital. Half an hour later, Stephen and Michelle arrived.

All of a sudden there was tension in the air. Stephen had problems with Ed and Kev, Kev had problems with me, and for some unknown reason Ed was behaving weirdly around me. Apart from that, Carol was busy giving Michelle murderous looks. On top of all that, Jake was confused why Stephen and Michelle showed up today, as he was unaware of his birthday surprise at midnight. Could things be more complex? I hoped not.

Somehow Stephen tackled the subject and lied that he was here with his cousin to make peace between Carol and Michelle. I gave him a glance of gratitude and he nodded.

I was sure if the seven of us stick together in the same room for too long, the odds were high that the awkwardness permeating in the room would be enough to choke us to death, so, after spending some uncomfortable moments in the living room, I decided to take charge of the night myself. I told Jake to give Stephen and Michelle a tour of the house. Once they were gone, I cornered Carol and told her about the whole episode in the store. I told her to take Kev to the terrace to talk to him and to make him to talk to her; he desperately needed someone to talk to, and surely, I was not that person.

Finally when everyone left, I dragged Ed to the kitchen to prepare dinner. I settled on cooking a roasted chicken while I instructed Ed to prepare a carrot, radish salad.

I was nearly done with dinner when Stephen stepped in kitchen.

“Hey, Steph…en,” Ed greeted him cautiously. Stephen seemed completely unaffected. Stephen didn’t even spare Ed a glance as his eyes were trained on me.

“Do you need anything?” I asked as politely as I could.

“I need to talk to you.” His eyes finally shifted to Ed. “Preferably alone.”

“I…I’ll check up on the others,” Ed suggested and I nodded. Ed made his way out of the kitchen hastily, staring down at the floor.

“What is it?” I asked as Stephen moved towards me.

Stephen rubbed his hands together like he was nervous. “Kev showed up on my doorstep last night.”

I was surprised to hear that. “He did?”

“Yeah, and… and he was drunk.”

“What?!”

“Yeah. He told me all about…you know…all about last night.”

“Exactly what did he tell you?”

“That you don’t love him anymore. That he can’t bear to live with the feeling of not being able to be loved by you. That he still loves you and can never love anyone else the way he loves you. That he’s broken. That he was sorry.” That ‘sorry’ word piqued my interest. “He said he was sorry for everything he did to me because now he knows how I felt when he…” Stephen inhaled a deep breath and ducked his head down. “…when he broke my heart.”

“Oh.” That was the only response I was able to give. I tried to wrap my head around the news Stephen just gave me. “I know Kevin’s hurt right now and is probably thinking that the world has just ended, but believe me, it’s for the best. I’m sure he’ll understand someday when he meets his special someone.”

Finally, Stephen raised his eyes to look at me. “He’s really hurt and broken, Zune. I mean, I just want to ask…are you certain that special someone is not you?” There were several emotions I could hear in his voice, and if I was not wrong, one of them was concern, concern for Kev. If I was putting the pieces together correctly, was it possible that after what Kev did to him, he had still feelings for him?

“You care about him? You…still like him?” I blurted out the questions without thinking much about what I was asking.

“I’ll take that as a yes, and now I’m gonna pretend that you didn’t ask me those questions.” Stephen turned around and began to walk away.

“What did you do with drunken Kev?” I asked cocking my head to my left.

Stephen looked back, raised his brows and smirked. “After listening to his sad story I kicked his sorry ass out of my house.”

On one hand he sounded concerned for Kev, but on the other hand he threw a vulnerable Kev out of his house. I was not sure whether any of these facts were making any sense. “You confuse me, Stephen Torres,” I admitted with a smile.

“That’s the motto.” He smiled back and left.

Dinner was an awkward affair. No one was saying much, and out of the seven of us, only Jake was trying to make small talk. On one side of the dining table was Kev, Michelle, and I, while Stephen, Carol, Ed, and Jake were seated across from us.

Ed was staring at me as if trying to figure me out. I raised my brows and he smiled. It’s official; Ed was mad.

Stephen and Kev were stealing glances at each other every now and then. Those glances definitely seemed unsettling to both of them.

Carol was giving intense looks to Michelle. However, Michelle was reciprocating those looks with slight smiles.

“So, is everyone excited? Tomorrow is our first day of the semester.” Jake tried again to hold up a conversation.

“At least I am,” Michelle gushed.

“I don’t think there is much of any reason to get excited about it, Jake.” Carol was addressing Jake, but her eyes were fixed on Michelle.

“I think—” Michelle began to say something but Carol cut her off.

“Before you grace us with the knowledge of what you think, I must tell you I-don’t-give-a-flying-fuck.”

“Carol!” I warned her.

“What the hell is your problem? Why are you still so pissed off at me? What do you need me to do?” Michelle asked in annoyance.

“Well, for starters, right now I need what only you can provide: your absence.” Carol-the bitch was not ready to back down. She was actually attacking her with her standoffish words.

“Carol, you shut up right now!” Jake warned her, but Michelle didn’t wait for Carol to say more nasty and stood up abruptly from her chair.

“Mich. Mich, calm down. She’s just teasing you.” Stephen tried to make her sit down again.

“I apologize on behalf of Carol. I’m sure she didn’t mean to offend you.” I also tried to cool her down while frowning at Carol. “Carol, apologize! Now!”

Carol didn’t react at all as she was busy concentrating on stuffing her face with food. The royal bitch!

Michelle stepped around her chair and walked quickly to the refrigerator and brought out a cake which was set on a plate. She carried the cake and came back to the dining table. She strolled over to Carol’s chair and put down the cake on one side of her plate. It was a strawberry shortcake and the words written over it were ‘Sorry Carol’ with a smiley face.

“I brought this cake today to apologize to you for my childish behavior that day at the café. I was ready to move past the stupid strawberry-pastry incident; I wanted us to at least be civil with one another, but clearly you don’t want that. I figure that just knowing you have successfully insulted and embarrassed me again makes your day.” Michelle made her point, came back to her seat, and continued to eat her food like nothing had happened. I gave Carol a disapproving look.

After dinner I dragged Carol into the kitchen. I was damn angry because of her relentless obnoxious behavior.

“What the hell is your problem, Carol? I hope you know that you crossed a line there at the dinner table. I don’t know what has gotten into you. Nowadays you are pissed off at everyone for no valid reason. You argue with Jake and me, you insult Ron, Kev, and Ed, and I don’t know why, but you seem damn keen to embarrass Michelle, who has been nothing but nice to you all evening.” Carol just stood there staring at the floor. I gently shook her shoulders. “Carol, look at me.” She raised her head. Her eyes were wet with tears. “Carol. What’s going on? Please talk to me. Please.”

“I know I’m…I’m nothing but a royal pain in the ass lately. but…but I can’t help it. I don’t know why, but after the whole Daryl episode I’m always angry, always bitter. I swear, Zune, I…I try to stop myself, to control all of these fucking emotions, but I…I can’t. I…I just can’t help being a stubborn, stupid bitch. Falling in love was my biggest mistake.” Carol said and burst into tears.

“Oh, Carol.” I wrapped my arms around her, and she rested her chin on my shoulder. “Falling in love wasn’t your mistake, but falling in love with that greedy, heartless bastard was. I think everything happens for a reason though.” I tried to comfort her, caressing her back slowly.

“Everything happens for a reason but, but sometimes things happen because you’re too stupid and make bad decisions.”

I pulled back. “I know you, Carol. You are a girl with a golden heart. I know you care about us, and I believe that you will eventually come out of this Daryl phrase and re-discover the real you, the real Carol, who has a sharp tongue with tons of emotions, who’s maybe blunt but is never rude, who rarely shows emotions but understands them too well, who’s capable of winning battles with her words but would never deliberately hurt anyone with them. My Carol, who’s the best girlfriend in this whole world.” I gave her a smile and she chuckled.

“I promise I’ll try to do better.”

“That’s my girl.”

“And I think I owe an apology to Michelle,” she said while I exaggeratedly rose my brows. “What?”

“That is the first time you ever called her by her name,” I mentioned, hiding a grin. She gently shoved me back and left, probably to apologize to Michelle.

***

It was 10.00 pm and we had only two hours to put our plan into action without Jake finding out anything about it.

According to our plan, I would call Ron and make sure that he will make his entry at exactly midnight. Then, I will take Jake, along with Carol and Stephen, to the terrace to keep him occupied so that Kev, Ed, and Michelle can decorate the whole house and made the rest of the preparations.

Stephen, Carol, Jake, and I were standing at the end of the terrace, leaning on the iron railing talking about books, food, boys, porn, television shows, movies, and about life in general. We discussed nothing and everything. Jake mentioned many times that it was getting late and about to rain, so we all should get to bed. He said it was also getting late for Stephen and Michelle, but it was nothing that Carol couldn’t deal with; she handled the situation well.

“Tomorrow is your first day at college! How do you feel? Nervous? Excited?” Jake asked me with his happy-go-lucky smile.

“Both,” I replied with a shrug.

Stephen sighed. “I hope this new college and new life brings more happiness and less complications in my life.”

Carol stared up at the starless sky and hugged herself. “I just want to make a better life for myself and I want to get the old Carol back.”

“So let’s wish that this new day proves to be the fresh beginnings in our lives,” Jake mumbled, and put his hand forward, palm up.

“Let’s leave behind every awful memory, and embrace new ones.” I joined in and put my hand over Jake’s.

“Let’s erase the pain we don’t deserve, and make a place for the happiness we do deserve,” Stephen chimed in and laid his hand over mine.

“Let’s forget about the stupid mistakes we made in the past, and welcome the possibilities of experiencing a better life in the future.” Carol gave her two cents worth in this little wish-ceremony and placed her hand over Stephen’s.

And then the four of us chorused together: “Amen.” The thunder of the clouds echoed around us. We all smiled. Soon, we began talking about nothing and everything again.

***

I checked my phone for the nth time. The time was five minutes to twelve; only five minutes were left for Ron’s arrival, and still no one had messaged me from downstairs to let me know that everything was all ready.

“I’m sure all the arrangements for my birthday surprise would have been done by now.” Jake’s playful voice made us snap our heads in his direction.

“You knew?!” I asked, staring at him in awe. Jake just nodded.

“But how?” Carol asked, knitting her brows together.

“Well, it was not that difficult to discover. There were several hints, for instance, Stephen and Michelle showed up today and they are still with us. Also, we never ever hang out on the terrace till so late before, and apart from that, the way you are staring at your phone every other minute, Zune, there’s nothing left that I couldn’t piece together.” Jake smirked in self-appreciation while the three of us huffed. In the meantime, Ed finally messaged me that everything was done downstairs.

Before anyone could say another word, the actual surprise of the night hollered Jake’s name. “Jake!” The four of us looked down at the road; Ron was riding on a motorbike which was filled with red-hearted balloons. “Jake! I love you!” Ron’s happy shouting and the brilliant smile on his face made Jake remarkably happy. Jake was grinning from ear to ear. He looked at Stephen, then at Carol, and finally at me.

“How’s the surprise, Jake?” I couldn’t hold back my smile. It was midnight now. I hugged him tightly. “Happy Birthday, Jake!”

Carol and Stephen congratulated him the same way I did. We looked down at the road; Ron had parked his bike on the far end of the road and brought out a big box somewhere from in between those dozens of balloons. He slowly opened the box; there was a chocolate cake in it. Ron looked up at Jake. “I love you, Jake!” he yelled it again like the fool in love that he was.

Jake laughed softly. “Before he wakes the whole street up and makes a bigger fool of himself than he already has, I should go downstairs.” Jake raced downstairs. Stephen, Carol, and I ran behind him.

Downstairs everything was perfect. The decorations, the food, the gifts, everything looked great. Michelle, Kev, and Ed chorused Happy Birthday to You once they saw Jake. Jake hugged them and thanked them for everything. I let the three of them know that Ron was outside.

Jake rushed towards the front door. Stephen, Carol, and I were still behind him. Jake stopped abruptly before the closed door but didn’t open it, instead, he swirled around and stared at us. The look of ecstasy mixed with a little anxiousness had turned his face beet-red. “How do I look?” Jake asked letting out a nervous laugh.

“Dashing!” Stephen complimented.

“Phenomenal!” I added.

“Gay!” Carol teased playfully and we all chuckled.

Jake took a deep breath, turned around, and opened the door slowly. He began rushing towards Ron as the clouds roared again.

Ron was busy carefully inserting a small brown candle in the centre of the cake. When the candle successfully stood right in the middle, he lit it and looked ahead. The balloons were still tangled around the motorbike while Ron began walking towards Jake with the cake in one hand and a bunch of red roses in the other. The radiant smile on his face was enough to depict his longing to see the guy he was in love with.

Stephen, Carol, and I stopped at the porch as we saw Jake and Ron moving towards each other.

“Say it again,” Jake commanded Ron while stepped towards him.

“I love you.” Ron complied happily.

“Again.”

“I love you.”

“Once more.”

“I love—” WHAM!

For a few seconds I thought everything around me ceased to move. Ron never got to say the rest of the words. A car came out of nowhere, slammed into him, and raced away. Just like that.

From that point on everything seemed to happen in slow motion. Ron flew meters up in the air and then fell flat on his back in the road. The flowers and cake in his hands were thrown a few feet away from him while his motorbike and balloons were still in the same place.

“RON!” Jake ran towards Ron. Stephen, Carol, and I sped in their direction. When we got near them, we found that Ron’s head was lying in Jake’s lap. Ron’s face was immersed in blood. His hair was drenched with blood. He was struggling for every breath. He was writhing like a fish out of water. “SOMEONE PLEASE CALL 911!” Jake screamed at the top of his lungs.

Stephen hastily dialed 911 and asked for an ambulance. Carol just stood there dumbstruck. I saw Michelle, Ed, and Kev running towards us.

“Ron! Ron! Ron! Just stay with me, please! Just stay with me!” Jake was begging Ron to keep his eyes open. Ron began to cough up blood. “SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING, PLEASE!” Jake cried again. “Ron, Please!”

Ron was trying hard to stay awake, to hold his eyes open, and to keep fighting for every breath, but I knew he was losing the battle. This whole scene in front of me seemed like déjà vu, as this was not the first time I was watching someone dying in somebody’s arms, and just like before, I was a mute spectator.

“The ambulance will be here any moment! Don’t worry!” Stephen tried to assure Jake but I knew it would be too late.

“Ron! Don’t you dare to give up on me! Please, just please don’t give up! I love you, Ron. We…we have to do so many things together. I can’t do them alone, Ron. Please! Please! Please!”

The wind sped up and the clouds bellowed again. It was about to rain.

Jake’s helplessness was tearing my heart apart. He held Ron in his trembling hands, talking to him, trying to keep him awake, while Ron kept gasping for air.

“J…J…Jake.” This was the only word Ron was able to say with his ragged breaths, and then the rain began pouring down from the black sky.

The ambulance arrived the next moment. “The ambulance is here!” Stephen shouted.

“He’s dead.” Jake stated in a stoic voice.

“Jake, let the paramedics—” Stephen tried to reason with Jake but he said it again.

“He’s dead.” Stephen and Carol took Jake aside, but his eyes were fixed on Ron’s unmoving body. “He’s dead.”

The paramedics examined Ron and we all held our breath, but unfortunately, Jake was right; Ron was gone.

After that, whatever happened was a blur to me. I accompanied Jake in the ambulance while he kept staring at Ron throughout the ride. The rest of our friends followed us in Kev’s and Edward’s car.

Ron was examined once again, but the conclusion was the same: Ron was dead. Jake didn’t cry or say a word. He just stood outside the room, gazing at the floor the whole time, while Ron’s body was inspected inside. Even after another confirmation from the doctors that Ron was gone, Jake didn’t show any sign of emotion on his face.

The police came and took our statements. They said that they would try to contact Ron’s parents as there were some necessary formalities needed to be taken care of.

As soon as Mom found out about Ron she came running to us. She instructed all of us to take Jake home and she’d deal with doctors, the police, and any other formalities. Soon Matt arrived too and said that he’d stay back with my mom and would help her take care of everything.

Ed, Kev, and Michelle left first so that they could take down all the decoration and remove anything that could upset Jake any further.

A little bit later, Stephen, Carol, and I walked outside of the hospital with Jake, who seemed to be drowning in the abyssal depths of sorrow. I couldn’t blame him. I had no words which could comfort him. As much as I wanted to help him, I knew that somehow he had to go through this pain all alone, because perhaps, I could understand his pain, but I could never feel his pain.

It was morning now and there was no sign of the rain. The sun was shining in the cloudless sky. Carol drove us home. As we stepped out of the vehicle, Jake’s eyes stared at the place where Ron took his last breath in his arms. His eyes welled up with tears. Carol gently held his shoulders and took him inside the house. Stephen and I followed them.

All the decorations were gone. The house looked as plain as always. Everyone was quiet and everyone’s eyes were trained on Jake’s every movement. He was gazing at Ron’s jacket laid on the sofa which he left behind weeks ago.

Jake slowly walked to the sofa and cautiously lifted the jacket in his hands. He kept staring at it with his glistening eyes until someone rang the doorbell.

“I’ll go get it,” Kev whispered and went to open the door.

A few minutes later he came back with a CD in his hand. “This…this CD is for…Jake,” Kev said, showing us the CD.

“Who sent it?” Carol asked in hushed tone.

Kev swallowed audibly, looked at Jake and then at me. I raised my brows in anticipation. “It’s from…it’s from Ron,” Kev finally replied leaving us all stunned. Jake turned around and glanced at Kev. “Yesterday Ron made some arrangements so Jake would get the CD this morning.”

Jake stepped towards Kev, took the CD from his hand, and headed towards the CD player, inserting the CD in it. There was complete silence in the living room. Despite the presence of seven people in the room, it felt empty.

As soon as the CD started, Ron’s voice cut through the dead silence.

“Jake!” That was the first word we heard from the CD. Jake’s breathing quickened with Ron’s voice as he tightened his grip on the jacket in his hands. “Happy birthday! Happy birthday to the most amazing guy on this whole planet. If everything happened as per my plans last night, I’m sure you and I are still in bed making love.” Ron laughed softly.

“I have always wished that things between us would get back to normal again. These last few weeks were the toughest for me, but I was quite certain there was nothing our love couldn’t conquer. But there are some things I’m sure I haven’t have told you last night which I really need to say.” Ron inhaled a deep breath.

“Well, Carol called me the other night and informed me that you have figured out your feelings, that you love me. Believe me, Jake, since then I’ve been on cloud nine, I have been waiting to see you, to hold you in my arms, to kiss the hell out of you. If I have done all those things last night then I must promise that I’ll keep doing that the rest of our lives together.” Ron paused for a few moments.

For a second I thought there was nothing else on the CD, but then Ron continued in his cheerful voice. “I love you, Jake; I always have. I made some stupid mistakes, made some foolish decisions, but I didn’t understand how big of an asshole I was until you left. Without you, the most precious things in this world hold no value. Without you, the most important moments of life seems insignificant. Without you, I’m alone in a crowd. Without you, New Year’s and Christmas feel as gloomy as a funeral to me. You are everything to me, Jake. You…you make me the good person I never thought I could be. You…you complete me, Jake.” Another pause. “On your birthday, I’m gonna make you some promises, but after that you have to get your hot piece of ass out of bed and make me my favorite breakfast, and if you get lucky, I’ll share it with you in our cozy bed.” Ron chuckled and Jake’s legs began to shake.

These promises normally people make on their wedding, but I can’t wait that long. So here I am.” Jake fell on his knees to the floor, still holding the jacket in his arms. “I promise that you’ll be the boss of our house. I promise to never argue with you if we ever get into a fight even if you’re wrong; yeah, I’m that good. I’ll let you choose your preferred side on the bed; though after tossing and turning together the whole night in the bed, I can’t promise you which side you will end up in the morning. I promise that I’ll help you with the household chores apart from cooking; you know I’m a disaster in the kitchen.” Jake began to sob. “I promise to make you happy. I promise to always keep that beautiful smile on your face. I promise to take good care of you. I promise to keep you safe. I promise to always be faithful to you. I promise to never break your heart again. I promise that I’ll never leave your side, no matter what. I promise that no one can make us part. Even if someone has to die between us, I wish it would be me before you. I want to take my last breath in the comfort of your arms, calling your name.” Jake was sniveling and panting. Even I couldn’t hold back my tears because that’s the way Ron took his last breath, in the arms of Jake, calling his name.

“You and I will always remain together like true soul-mates till…till death do us part.” Jake burst into tears clinging to the jacket. “Till death do us part. Till death do us part.”

The CD was probably caught in a loop as it was playing that last line again and again and again.

“Till death do us part. Till death do us part. Till death do us part.”

Jake cried harder.

“Till death do us part. Till death do us part. Till death do us part.”

He held the jacket more closely as if it was Ron.

“Till death do us part. Till death do us part. Till death do us part.”

And Jake kept crying like there was no tomorrow for him.

“Till death do us part. Till death do us part. Till death do us part.”

Death had interfered in Jake and Ron’s love story and ruthlessly ripped them apart. I walked over to Jake and knelt beside him. He looked up at me with his teary eyes. I pulled him towards me and put my arms around him. Jake said in his muffled voice, “He’s gone.” I hugged him tighter. “Ron is gone.”

In that moment I was sure that not only had we lost Ron, but we had also lost the Jake we knew and loved.

 

TBC.


Author's Note: Please don’t kill me but Ron has to die. His death would bring many turns and twists in the coming chapters so stay tuned.

Please let me know what you guys think of this chapter. Even if you didn’t like anything please tell me. It would help me a lot to improve.

A very :thankyou:  to Lisa, Silentdreamer, Jeet01, Terry P, Dariyo, Lilansui, Gregg, Sammiam, areaderatheart3, Nasim K., Wintersmiles, Svt999, Clochette, George Richard and all my readers for reading, reviewing, liking and following my story. Your support always

inspire me to keep writing. You guys are just awesome :)

Copyright © 2017 sacredlove; All Rights Reserved.
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Gosh, this chapter encapsulates all the emotions I feel throughout the story: happiness, anger, and sadness. Sacredlove that is a good thing. When a story can take me through the emotional spectrum, I count that as a high achievement. I really love your characters, and wish them ultimate happiness!

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On 04/05/2015 06:01 AM, Drew Espinosa said:
Gosh, this chapter encapsulates all the emotions I feel throughout the story: happiness, anger, and sadness. Sacredlove that is a good thing. When a story can take me through the emotional spectrum, I count that as a high achievement. I really love your characters, and wish them ultimate happiness!
Thank you so much for the review. Your praising words made my day. It was good to know that you are loving the characters and emotions in my story. I promise there will be a happy ending for everyone but this story is nowhere near to be finished so keep reading and sharing your views. Take care:)
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All the emotions in this chapter from the various characters was phenomenal. Stephen's anger, Zune's dilemma, Kev's helplessness, Carol's childish behavior, Ed's happiness, Ron's cute surprises and in the end a broken Jake. Ron died on Jake's birthday, what could be more heartbreaking? Kudos for another incredible chapter!

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Did you have to kill Ron!! :,( My poor Jake, I can't believe that happened...shocked and sad...

Great chapter Sacred, keep writing more, post the next chapter quickly, I want to know what happens to Jake. That was too sad.

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First of all i want to congratulate you for this amazing chapter......i wonder how much time and effort it takes to give us this....you are right...i have to write atleast one review for this.You make me sad......it happens like this in real life...but you have the option to make it much more hapyy in fantacy.Such in depth writing....you certainly gearing up the standard.Now you have to work harder then ever to make this worthy for us lol.And i think i know what are you planning to do with Carol and Michelle ;)

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Well, you already know how sad I am over Ron's death, sacred. :( Poor Jake. And of course having his b/f, the person that he loved most in this world, die on his birthday, is horrible. He will always remember his birthday as now the saddest day of the year, instead of the happiest.

 

I wonder what will happen now with Jake? I'm afraid he'll go off the deep end and close everyone off and just suffer in his own private hell. I hope his friends don't let him do that. He needs his friends by his side, now more than ever.

 

I did like Zune's talk with Stephen. I'm glad Stephen came to Jake's b-day party. Maybe he can accept Ed and Kevin's apologies and learn to coexist with them.

 

Terrific chapter, sacred. You certainly know how to pull on my heartstrings. lol

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Brilliant story Sacred - truly gut wrenching in places - an emotional roller coaster - please dont keep us in suspence too long before posting the next chapter

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On 04/06/2015 10:41 PM, silentdreamer said:
All the emotions in this chapter from the various characters was phenomenal. Stephen's anger, Zune's dilemma, Kev's helplessness, Carol's childish behavior, Ed's happiness, Ron's cute surprises and in the end a broken Jake. Ron died on Jake's birthday, what could be more heartbreaking? Kudos for another incredible chapter!

Thank You so much for your review, Rajat. About this chapter, all the jumbled up emotions were necessary to convey each character's inner feelings. And heartbreak has just started...but I promise next chapter would be kind of a happy one:)

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On 04/07/2015 12:47 AM, lilansui said:
Did you have to kill Ron!! :,( My poor Jake, I can't believe that happened...shocked and sad...

Great chapter Sacred, keep writing more, post the next chapter quickly, I want to know what happens to Jake. That was too sad.

Hey Sui, Thanks a lot for your review. I have started working on the next chapter and hopefully by the middle of next month I'll be able to complete it.

 

In coming chapters Jake would try to get past the memories of his first love while entangled in some unknown emotions. Next chapter would bring many changes in the lives of Zune, Jake, Stephen and Carol so stay tuned:)

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On 04/09/2015 02:43 AM, jeet01 said:
First of all i want to congratulate you for this amazing chapter......i wonder how much time and effort it takes to give us this....you are right...i have to write atleast one review for this.You make me sad......it happens like this in real life...but you have the option to make it much more hapyy in fantacy.Such in depth writing....you certainly gearing up the standard.Now you have to work harder then ever to make this worthy for us lol.And i think i know what are you planning to do with Carol and Michelle ;)

Hey Jeet, thank you so much for your review. Well, it's not my efforts alone in this story to make it readable...I couldn't have come so far without Lisa. She's an angel.And if you think this story is even worth reading then half of the credit goes to her.

 

And I know that you know what I'm planning for Carol and Michelle, lol but you never know.

 

Your amazing words always encourages me to work harder on my chapters, Jeet so keep them coming. I'll try not to disappoint you in coming chapters:)

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On 04/13/2015 04:46 AM, Lisa said:
Well, you already know how sad I am over Ron's death, sacred. :( Poor Jake. And of course having his b/f, the person that he loved most in this world, die on his birthday, is horrible. He will always remember his birthday as now the saddest day of the year, instead of the happiest.

 

I wonder what will happen now with Jake? I'm afraid he'll go off the deep end and close everyone off and just suffer in his own private hell. I hope his friends don't let him do that. He needs his friends by his side, now more than ever.

 

I did like Zune's talk with Stephen. I'm glad Stephen came to Jake's b-day party. Maybe he can accept Ed and Kevin's apologies and learn to coexist with them.

 

Terrific chapter, sacred. You certainly know how to pull on my heartstrings. lol

Hey Lisa, thank you so much for your review and constant support.

 

I know I was being cruel killing Ron on Jake's birthday but you know me. Well, Jake will recover but with that he'll also have to deal with someone new in his life.

 

Stephen will definitely not going to forgive Kev and Ed but, as you said, he'll learn to coexist with them. In all this Zune, Jake, Stephen and Carol will stick together, having each others' back.

 

Once again Lisa, thanks for your praising words:)

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On 08/03/2015 09:31 PM, AlanK said:

Brilliant story Sacred - truly gut wrenching in places - an emotional roller coaster - please dont keep us in suspence too long before posting the next chapter

Hey AlanK! Thank you very much for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed my story so far and you got what I was trying to convey through my story.

 

Well, I have started working on my next chapter so suspense will be over soon. Keep reading and sharing your views, they're like fuel to me:)

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I know this seems wierd but I get Zune and Ed belonged together since I found out about the painting. Took it as love at first sight on Ed's part...

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12 hours ago, bundu_st said:

I know this seems wierd but I get Zune and Ed belonged together since I found out about the painting. Took it as love at first sight on Ed's part... 

Yes, it was love at first sight for Ed and maybe they belong together but will they end up together? Well, you have to wait to know that.

 

Thank you for the review. Keep reading :) 

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Hmmm I see maybe Kevin & Stephen getting together in the future and this chapter while heartbreaking wasn’t completely unexpected. The psychic predicted tragedy in Jake’s future and that he would find his true love after that if I recall correctly so I couldnt imagine anything more tragic than the death of Ron amplified by the fact they were getting back together.

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Someone new will come along for Jake soon but he would have his own baggage and secrets to reveal. About Kevin and Stephen, they share a long past together but what their future holds them depends on both of them and a bit on theiir fates.

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On 8/4/2018 at 10:46 AM, NimirRaj said:

Hmmm I see maybe Kevin & Stephen getting together in the future and this chapter while heartbreaking wasn’t completely unexpected. The psychic predicted tragedy in Jake’s future and that he would find his true love after that if I recall correctly so I couldnt imagine anything more tragic than the death of Ron amplified by the fact they were getting back together.

Someone new will come along for Jake soon but he would have his own baggage and secrets to reveal. About Kevin and Stephen, they share a long past together but what their future holds them depends on both of them and a bit on theiir fates.

 

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