Last Chance High - 9. Chapter 9

Since their day at the convention had been called short Mr. Stark let all the kids pile into one room to hang out and watch movies. As the others started to get comfortable Toni stood next to the bed him and Marc had shared, unsure where to sit. Marc climbed up and sat with his back against the headboard. He reached up and pulled Toni down to sit between his legs. Toni tensed and started to pull away but Marc wound his arms around his waist and pulled him against his chest.

“Relax, Toni, it’s okay. No one cares. Look around. Relax, it’s okay.” Marc mumbled in his ear.

Toni’s eyes darted around the room. Daphne squeezed between Marc and Alex on the bed, his arm around her shoulders as she laid her head on his chest. Simon stretched out in one of the chairs ankles crossed on the other, and Isabelle snuggled in his lap. Breanna and Madison were lying on their stomachs on the other bed, feet in the air a blanket draped over both their backs. There was no way everyone had been so blind as to miss Marc pulling Toni down to sit with him. Impossible for Daphne and Alex not to notice his arms wrapped around Toni’s waist. Toni relaxed a bit, maybe Marc was right. Maybe no one cared. He leaned against the older boy’s chest and stretched his legs out in front of him. He felt Marc exhale, as if he had held his breath, then gently brush his lips across Toni’s temple. Toni shivered at the intimate action. Madison had the remote and was flipping through channels, arguing with Simon and Alex over what to watch. They stopped on some action movie with actors Toni didn’t recognize. Madison raised her head and looked right at Toni, he tensed up again.

“You ever see this one, Toni?” Toni shook his head. “It’s amazing, there’s a great fight scene about halfway in where this chicks kicks everyone's ass.” She turned back to the TV, not even acknowledging Toni’s compromising position. Toni relaxed again.

“I told you, you’re safe here. To be yourself.” Marc whispered to Toni, gently rubbing the back of his hand before intertwining their fingers. Toni let Marc take his hand.

A few minutes into the movie there was a knock at the door, Mr. Stark’s voice coming through loud.

“Separate!”

The teens scrambled. Isabelle jumped to the floor, her back against the bed in front of the other girls. Madison sat up and Breanna reached down and took a strand of Isabelle’s hair making it into a braid. Marc slid away and crossed his legs behind Toni’s back. Daphne grabbed him and pulled him onto his stomach. His heart was racing; he had almost forgotten they were on a school trip. The door opened and Mr. Stark stepped in carrying two grocery bags of junk food. He set them on the table and glanced around the room. Toni tried not to look guilty.

“Marc, Toni. Can I see you two in the hall a minute?”

The boys got up, shrugging their shoulders at the curious glances of their friends. Mr. Stark closed the door behind them.

“Do I need to worry about you two?”

Marc crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. “What do you mean coach? About the fight, nah, it’s all good.” He smirked and Mr. Stark frowned.

“No, that’s not what I’m talking about and you know it Marcley.” Toni couldn’t help but snicker at Marc’s full name. Marc glared at him. “Look, I may be dense but I’m not an idiot. I turned a blind eye yesterday because of the incident but I can’t have you two sharing a bed. You have to promise, separate beds boys. Or I’ll have to separate you.”

“What do you mean separate us?” Marc asked, his eyes narrowed.

“One of you will move to the girls’ room. Since I clearly remember you and Brittany Bates all over each other last year, Toni would have to bare the embarrassment of banishment to girl world.”

Toni could feel his cheeks burn and panic rise. Marc glanced over at him and gave a small smile.

“Don’t worry Coach, we promise.” Marc crossed his heart and flashed a big grin. Toni nodded.

Mr. Stark gave them a pointed look before turning away and heading back to his room, “I will be dropping in periodically.” He called over his shoulder.

Toni slumped against the wall; Marc still had that stupid grin on his face. They looked at each other a moment before bursting out in laughter. Marc draped his arm around the younger boys shoulder and pulled him close to press a gentle kiss to his temple. Their friends sat up expectantly when they came back in.

“So....What was that about?” Madison asked.

“Oh he just wanted to talk about what happened at the convention today.” Marc said with a shrug as he settled back on the bed. He patted the spot between his legs where Toni was sitting before. The others turned back to the movie and Toni crawled onto the bed and leaned against Marc’s chest. Alex handed Marc a pack of M&Ms which Marc tore open with his teeth. He poured some into Toni’s hand before wrapping his arms back around his waist. Toni popped a candy into his mouth.

“You want one?”

Marc nodded. “Blues my favorite.” He said opening his mouth encouraging Toni to feed it to him. Toni gripped a blue one and reached up. Marc closed his lips around Toni’s fingers and sucked. He his tongue to lap the candy out of the younger boy’s hand. Crunching the candy with a smirk Marc gave Toni a sultry wink. Toni turned back to the TV in embarrassment. He pulled his legs up to his chest, hoping it was enough to hide any movement in his pants.

Marc sighed. “I’m sorry, that was mean.” he whispered into Toni’s ear. Toni nodded. Marc dipped his head and brushed his lips against the sensitive skin on Toni’s neck, his breath tickling as he spoke. “I just couldn’t help myself.” Toni shivered and took a ragged breath. Marc jumped as Daphne elbowed him in the ribs.

She glanced around before whispering at him, “For God’s sake Marc, behave!”

Marc smiled. “Sorry.” he mumbled. Although he didn’t seem to mean it. Toni shifted and felt something hard pressing into his lower back. He felt Marc gently squeeze Toni, acknowledging what Toni had noticed. Toni couldn’t help but grin; at least Marc had been equally affected. He didn’t pay any attention to the movie, it was hard to focus on anything but Marc wrapped around him.

At some point Toni had fallen asleep and when he awoke he was on his side facing Daphne and Marc was laying behind him. The taller boy had one arm under Toni’s head like a pillow. The other wrapped around his waist holding the boy tight against his chest. One leg was bent; his knee wedged between Toni’s, and his face buried in the back of Toni’s neck. Someone had pulled a blanket over them. Toni heard the TV in the background and the sound of the opening door.

“Really?” Mr. Stark exclaimed. Toni tried hard not to stir.

“Oh come on Mr. Stark, just let them sleep.” Daphne spoke up.

“Yea, it’s not like anything is going to happen with all us here.” Alex put in.

“Do you think I’d LET anything happen while I’m in the same room?” Madison commented.

“If any of your parents found out...”

“It’s not like we’re going to tell them.” Daphne cut him off.

“I will deny any knowledge of this sleep over! You girls snuck in here behind my back. Those two told me they had girlfriends. And you will all be looking at suspensions!” Mr. Stark left with a soft click of the door. Toni cracked open an eye and saw Daphne peering down at him with a proud smile. She leaned over and gently kissed his cheek.

“You're welcome.” She whispered with a wink before snuggling back into Alex.

Toni reached up and slipped his hand into Marc’s, intertwining their fingers. Tomorrow they would return to reality. But for tonight he allowed himself this little pleasure. The comfort and safety of Marc’s strong arms.

+X+

Part of Toni was praying for Marc to kiss him after arriving back home on Sunday. But another part of him was glad he just brushed his lips against Toni’s temple. It would be easier that way.

Monday morning Toni woke up full of dread. What was going to happen at school today? What was Marc going to do? He felt sick. He wasn’t ready for this. He would have to make sure Marc knew that the holiday was over, that it was time to go back to reality. He grabbed his phone and sent out a text.

Meet me before school?

Marc’s reply came right away.

:) Yes please!

Toni felt like he was going to be sick. He hated what he was going to do, but he knew he had to do it. At least he had the decency to do it away from the school and prying eyes. After sending off a quick reply for Marc to meet him at the coffee shop Toni rolled out of bed to get dressed.

Marc stood outside the coffee shop and bounced in place. He was so anxious to see Toni, to talk to him, and oh how he wanted to hold him again. When he saw the other boy coming towards him he couldn’t stop the grin from stretching across his face. God’s he was beautiful.

“Good morning, Antonio.” He reached out to pull him into a hug. Toni tensed and stepped out of reach, eyes darting around.

“My name is Toni, Marc.” Marc frowned, but followed the younger boy as he led him inside to a table at the back. After grabbing two coffees they sat in silence. Marc studied Toni’s face. He was tense, and his eyes were sad. Marc worried, wondering why Toni wouldn’t look back at him. Marc reached out and put his hand over Toni’s.

“What wrong Toni?”

“Don’t touch me. Please, just...don’t. I can’t do this Marc, I just...I’m sorry. I just can’t.” Toni stumbled on his words.

Marc leaned back in the booth. “We’re back to this. Come on Toni, you have nothing to worry about.” Marc leaned forward again, his arms on the table. “No one is going to care. I’ve been out since freshman year, everyone knows and they accept it. And those that don’t are smart enough to keep their mouths shut.”

“They accept you Marc. You’re not...you’ve been with girls. To the other kids you’re just that hot jock who’s experimented. They ignore the rest of it because of who you are. It’s different for guys like me. People look for reasons to start trouble with me.”

“Toni, no one’s going to mess with you. I got your back, we all do. I thought you saw that this weekend.”

“I get that you don’t understand this. I get it that this is hard for you; it’s hard for me to. But I need you to understand that I’m not ready for this.” Toni still looked down at his cup. “I appreciate everything you did for me this weekend; really, you have no idea how much it meant to me. That you...were there.” Toni sniffled and his voice cracked. Marc got out of his seat and slid in next to him taking his hand.

“Hey, I was happy to do it. Toni, listen to me; I really, really care about you. And I get that you’re scared, I have no idea what you’ve been through and I couldn’t even begin to imagine. I just, I want to be there for you. I want to help you through this but you keep pushing me away.”

Toni slid away from him, nearly pressing himself against the wall. Marc had a sudden flashback to the way Daniels had him backed against the wall. Marc slide the other way, his heart aching.

“If you care, you’ll accept this. Just let it go.”

Marc sighed and leaned back against the bench, “I’ll let it go and I won’t tell anyone, I swear to you. But I won’t give up on you. I can’t go back Toni, now that I’ve had a taste I can’t give that up.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I held you Antonio. I held you while you cried and I held you while you slept, and there’s no way I can forget how it feels to have you in my arms. I can’t go back to pretending we’re just friends.”

“We ARE just friends.” Toni pointed out.

Marc’s jaw went slack. “Fine,” He snapped. “But that’s not what I want and I’m not going to pretend it is. I’m not going to deny how I feel about you.”

“Marc, you promised.” Toni hissed at him.

“I promised I wouldn’t say anything about you, my feelings are my own to express. And I’m not going to hide or deny that you’re the one I want.”

“God Marc, do you even care how hard that’s going to make things for me?”

“Do you know how hard it’s going to be, how hard it has been, to see you every day and not be able to touch you? You get squirrely every time I even talk to you. Do you know how hard it’s been to watch you every day, to want you every day and to be rejected by you every day? I can’t give you up Toni, I won’t give you up.”

Marc stood. “I’m sorry Toni, I guess I’m just too selfish to let you go.” With a sad smile Marc walked out of the coffee shop without looking back. He didn’t want Toni to see the tears that were slipping out. He knew he was being harsh, pushy even, but he had to show Toni that he was serious about this. That they were safe to be together. Marc wiped roughly at his eyes, he had to pull himself together before he got to school.

Toni sat in the booth, a now cold cup of coffee in his hands. His chest ached and his eyes burned. He wasn’t sure what he was feeling or if that conversation achieved what he had hoped. He felt so sad to have let Marc go, to have told the older boy they couldn’t be together. That he wouldn’t feel those strong arms around him. The gentle way Marc would brush his lips against Toni’s forehead or temple. He was angry at Marc for pushing him, for not accepting that he needed more time. He was angry that Marc was so arrogant to think he knew what was right for Toni. And still a part of him was overjoyed that Marc cared so much. That Marc wasn’t willing to give up on him. He was terrified about what that would mean. Toni sighed and pushed himself out of the booth, he was going to be late if he didn’t get going. He dumped his untouched cold coffee in the trash on his way out the door.

+X+

Marc was his usual friendly self, but there was sadness in his eyes that Toni could see. He kept good on his promise not to touch him. Though Toni saw him start to reach out towards him a few times before he caught himself.

It wasn’t until Tuesday things started to get weird. People he had never talked to before suddenly wanted to chat with him. Girls he had never met were flirting with him and he was sure he’d seen more than a few giving him the once over. By lunch he was fed up with the weirdness and hid out in the library to avoid people. It didn’t work very well. He overheard a not quite whispered conversation between two girls who sat behind him.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, that’s him. Toni Mancini.”

“I guess he’s kind of cute, but he’s sort of small.”

“Well I heard he’s way into martial arts. And his butt does look good in those tight jeans he wears.”

The girls giggled. Toni kept his head down and hoped he wasn’t blushing.

“I thought they were friends?” Now his ears perked up.

“They were; Toni was even going to join that sword club of his. Went to his competition last weekend too.” They we’re talking about him and Marc. His heart started to race; this was why people were acting so weird towards him.

“So what happened?”

“I don’t know. I guess Marc told him, asked him out and Toni rejected him.”

“Poor Marc. He must really have liked him; he doesn’t usually go for the whole commitment thing.”

“Still does.”

“No way!”

“Oh yea. Ellan is dating Zack and she said that Marc is still way into him. And Rachel said she overheard Marc talking to Alex about him.” Toni stifled a groan; Marc had been serious about not denying his feelings. He was admitting to people that he had a crush on Toni.

“I haven’t heard of any drama thou.”

“Nope, Katie said it was all very amicable. That the two of them still talk and stuff, have common friends. They even have gym together and it’s minimally awkward.” At least Marc also kept his word about not telling anyone about Toni.

The girls had moved from their seats and left the library. Toni wasn’t sure what to think about this. He knew the calm way the girls were discussing the gossip just proved Marc right. They only seemed shocked that Marc wanted a relationship at all. Toni put his forehead on the table and wished he wasn’t such a coward.

“You know, it’s not too late.” A girl with blond hair and stormy gray eyes sat down next to him.

“I’m sorry?”

She glanced around as if to make sure no one was listening. “You and Marc.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Who are you?”

“Bailey Miller. And I probably know that kelp head better than anyone. I was the first person to know he was into guys at all.”

“You were his best friend in middle school, he mentioned you.”

“Surprising actually.” Bailey opened the textbook she placed on the table and began flipping pages.

“Well, I called him kelp head one time and he said that’s what you called him.” Toni mumbled, still confused about why she was talking to him.

“Yea, he is a little dense. And pushy, and arrogant. But he means well.” Bailey shrugged. “Look, I’m sorry, I know I should mind my own business, but I still think of him as my friend and I hate to see him so miserable. I’m just saying I think you should trust him.”

“It’s not him I don’t trust.” Toni mumbled.

“Just talk to him.”

“I did.” Toni sighed. “Look, it’s complicated. And I don’t know you or have any interest in discussing this with you. Marc and I are friends, that’s all.”

Toni grabbed his books and rushed out of the library, smacking right into a hard chest. Strong hands griped his arms to keep him from landing on his ass.

“Hey there, you okay?”

Toni looked up at a boy with shaggy blonde hair and pale green eyes. Toni blinked once and shook his head to clear it. Realizing the other boy still hand his hands on Toni’s arms he pulled back roughly. “Yea, I’m okay, sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s all good, happens to the best of us. You’re that new kid, umm Toni right?” Toni nodded. “I’m Matt Neilson.” He had a nice style and an athletic build. “You sure you’re okay? You look a little, pale.”

Toni nodded again and took another step back.

“Come on, let’s get out of here.”

“What?”

“You need a break. There’s a coffee shop down the street. Doctor’s orders.”

Toni snorted. “You’re a doctor?”

“Well, no, not really. I’m going to be one day though. But that’s not the point. The point is I can see you are about 30 seconds from bolting and it would probably do you some good to get away.” Matt smiled. “What’s the worst that can happen?”

For some reason Toni found himself nodding again. “Alright. Let’s go.”

Together the two boys slipped out the front door. They headed down to the coffee shop Toni had met with Marc earlier that week. He made sure to avoid that booth.

“Look, I’m going to be straight up with you. I’ve heard the rumors and I don’t believe them.”

“What do you mean?” He tried to play it cool. Yea, Toni found it hard to believe a guy like Marc was into a guy like him too.

“Well, that’s part of the reason I dragged you out here. It’s not his feelings I doubt, I’ve seen the way he looks at you.” Matt kept his gaze steady on Toni, making him uncomfortable. Toni felt his face burn. “I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you rejected him because he’s not a girl.” Toni felt the panic rising, his heart was racing and his breath was coming shallow. “Don’t freak okay. Just hear me out. I get what’s going on because last year I was exactly where you are. I just, I figured you would need someone to talk to, who’s not emotionally invested this. Marc’s great, don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy. Definitely had my back when I came out, big time. But this is personal for him, that makes it messy.” Matt paused, waiting for Toni to say something. Toni leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms; Matt knew. He was offering his friendship and he was apparently openly gay. Or he was fucking with Toni big time.

“So, you think I’m...gay. And what...having a secret relationship with Marc Townsend?”

“No. I know you’re gay. And you aren’t ready to have a relationship with Marc. And he doesn’t get it. Look, think of me as your new sponsor.” Matt scribbled his number on a napkin and handed it to Toni. “Call me, we’ll hang out, talk. Whatever. No pressure.”

Toni took the napkin in his hands and stared at the neat numbers printed across it. He didn’t write his name. With a small smile Matt stood up and nodded in parting. Toni sat holding the napkin. Matt seemed sincere. It was a nice thought; someone to hang out with and talk to. Someone who wasn’t, as Matt said, emotionally invested. He put the number in his phone and smiled, deciding he was definitely going to call Matt. Or at least text him. He downed the rest of his coffee and headed back to school.