Everything Changes - 7. When The Night Closes in

Everything Changes:

Chapter 7 – When The Night Closes In

"Drive faster Dad, Alex needs me, I shouldn’t have left him tonight."

"Would you please calm down Brendan, you can't change things for him."

"Dad you don't get it, I knew something was wrong and something was going to happen. But I still left without saying a word to anybody."

"Brendan that is nonsense, you couldn’t know something was going to happen to Alex or that he would want you there tonight."

"Whatever," Brendan said in a huff.

Arriving at the hospital Brendan was out of the truck before Aaron ever had it completely parked, running directly to Alex's room ignoring people telling him to slow down.

Brendan streaked past the nursing station, Nurse Shelly smiled knowing who it was immediately.

Alex was lying in bed sobbing and shaking, never even noticing Brendan had arrived.

Brendan crawled into bed with Alex startling him, but once Alex saw Brendan's face he wound his arms around him as if his life was depending on his brother's support.

"Shhh.... it's going to be ok Alex, I promise you I won't let anything happen to you."

Aaron arrived on Alex's floor in the hospital stopping at the nurse's station.

"Shelly, did you see my kid fly by?"

"I saw a blur run by in a hurry to get into Alex's room. I am not sure what Alex was dreaming about but whatever it was really had him worked up. Doctor Millie will be in to see him on her rounds this morning."

"He is definitely hurting I have no doubt in that. I'm going to give the boys a bit before I go in, think I will go down and get a coffee." Aaron stated.

"Alex, tell me what is going please, I swear nothing bad is going to happen...."

"Brendan, I remember waking up in the car, Joey was leaning against me barely breathing and he was bleeding so bad.... Mom.... Mom's eyes were open but she.... she wasn't breathing at all."

"Alex, I can't imagine waking up to that, but I swear to you I won't leave you. I love you, Alex." Brendan sighed hugging Alex.

"Brendan, I don't think I can live with these nightmares or knowing that they both died and I lived. I don't know why I am still alive, and I don't deserve to be."

"Stop that Alex, you are a great person and a great brother I don’t want to hear you saying you don't deserve to be alive. Mom and Joey would be so pissed off to hear you saying that. You have always been there for anybody that needed you, so just let us be there for you."

"But how am I supposed to live like this? I try to sleep and I just see the same thing over and over, it's like watching that movie Ground Hog Day, you remember where he just relives the same day over again. Well, it is literally killing me slowly on the inside Brendan."

Brendan wiped his eyes not knowing what to say to his brother's confession. After a while, Brendan worked up some courage to ask Alex some questions.

"Alex, do you think you can talk to the psychiatrist when she comes to see you? Tell her what you told me, and maybe she can help. I don't think I can help much, I mean I can hug you and support you but I just.... I don't know what to say, I mean I miss Mom and Joey, but I am so damn happy that you're still alive I guess I am being selfish."

"Christ, you aren't selfish Brendan, I wish things could go back to normal, I wish I could just wake up from this and find out it was just a really bad dream."

"If it's a really bad dream, we are all living it bro."

"That's just it, I keep living the moment over and over again."

"Alex, I have a song that sort of fits the stuff we are going through, it’s a rendition of Sound of Silence by Disturbed."

"Sure, it's not like I am going anywhere."

Brendan held Alex's hand, not wanting to let go of his brother for fear of losing him. Clearing his throat, he began to sing....

Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence

And in the naked
Ten thousand people, maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence

"Fools", said I, "You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed
In the wells of silence
And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls"
And whispered in the sounds of silence light I saw

"Alex, life isn't going to be easy, times have changed.... we have all changed, we just have to remember who is there for us, and get our strength from each other."

Alex squeezed Brendan's hand, and used his other hand to wipe tears from his face.

"Brendan, can you just hold me for a while and maybe I can get some sleep?"

"Sure, I can do that for you."

Brendan snuggled in the bed pulling Alex into him, rubbing his hand gently against Alex's arm to hopefully soothe the bad dreams away.

Brendan remained vigilant until Aaron came into the room, then and only then Brendan let himself drift off to sleep while protecting his hero, his idol, his brother.

Aaron sat in the chair beside Alex's bed watching his sons sleep, thankful to have such caring kids.

Time passed and shift change at the hospital occurred, and soon the doctors started their ritual of morning rounds for patients. Soon there was a knock on the door by an older grandmotherly woman wearing a short white lab coat.

"Hello, I am Doctor Millie, I hear you are having a little bit of a time dealing with some tough issues Alex," She stated while pushing her glasses up her nose.

Alex looked away from the doctor, tight lipped and refused to say anything. In his mind, nothing was going to help him overcome the loss of his mother or best friend, other than the help of his brother.

"Alex, if you would tell me how you are feeling, I might be able to help you to be able to deal with your feelings."

Alex turned his focus back to the doctor, his eyes hollow, emotions numb, "No offense Doctor Millie, but I don't know you and I sure do not trust you. There are only a few people I trust in this world, and you are not one of them." Alex stiffly stated.

"Alex, if you don't talk about the things going on inside nothing will ever improve." Doctor Millie proclaimed.

"Listen Ma'am I am not in the mood to deal with you ripping my brain apart to declare me nuts."

"Young man you need to quit being so rigid towards getting help, but I can't force you to speak to me, so if you decide you would like to talk have a nurse or your father contact me."

Aaron spoke up, "I think this conversation has gone on long enough, you can't force him into anything, and he doesn't need to be more upset."

"Well, I hope you all have a splendid day then," Doctor Millie turned in a hasty retreat.

"Thanks, Dad, I know I'm not okay, but I believe I can find my way through this with Brendan's help."

"I am hoping Doctor Weinstien will get you out of here tomorrow or the next day, being at home with all of us around to support and care for you, would make us all feel a lot better soon. I think he is to stop in after lunch."

Brendan continued laying there with Alex, sharing his support and love.

"Boys, I am going to go get a fresh coffee do either of you want anything?" Aaron asked them before leaving Alex’s hospital room.

"Brendan, I know this is going to sound mean, but I don't want Dad to know what my dreams are about right now. I don't think even Dad could deal with them."

"Alex, you know Dad loves all of us, he would do everything he could to help you."

"I know he would but this is something I want just between you and I."

"So, what are we going to do about your dreams?"

"I just want you to hold me when I need it, and we can talk about them if I feel up to it, okay?"

"Okay, but you need to be honest with me Alex, I can't lose you too. I have one more song for you today by REM, it is called Everybody Hurts."

When your day is long
And the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life
Well hang on
Don't let yourself go
'Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone (hold on)
(Hold on) if you feel like letting go (hold on)
If you think you've had too much
Of this life
Well, hang on

'Cause everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts
Don't throw your hand
Oh, no
Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone
No, no, no, you're not alone

If you're on your own
In this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much
Of this life
To hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on

Everybody hurts

You are not alone

"Wow bro, you are getting really good at singing,” Alex hugged his brother, “I am glad you are my little brother."

Aaron came in to the room with a smile on his face carrying his coffee.

"Well boys, I have some good news, I just got done speaking with Doctor Weinstein. They are going to get Alex up on crutches in a bit and if he can tolerate the crutches today he is able to go home tomorrow. Then maybe we can get our lives back on some form of normalcy."

Brendan got a huge smile on his face, and hugged Alex like tomorrow was Christmas day.

"Alex, I will do whatever you need when you get home, I don’t care what it is. As long as you are home, you don’t have to worry about anything, if I can help it."

"Boys with Auntie Joh and Cam being at home, would you mind if I headed home for the rest of the day? I made arrangements that Brendan is allowed to spend the night here with you Alex, so you are not going to be alone. I will come back first thing in the morning, and as soon as Doctor Weinstien gives you the boot, we will get you guys home."

"YES," both boys shouted enthusiastically.

Aaron walked over with a smile and kissed both boys on the forehead and bid a farewell.

"Alex, I overheard Dad and Auntie Joh talking last night. Dad said he really needs to go back to work as soon as possible, one of the guys is off on sick leave. You know they were short-handed with Uncle Derek getting killed, and now Dad and Max were off too. So maybe we should tell him tomorrow that we will be okay with just the four of us at home."

"Ya, I know Dad loves his job, and Max is probably going stir crazy at home without everybody."

"To be honest, last night was the first I have heard him mention anything about work since you guys were in the accident. It is like the world stopped at that moment for all of us."

"Brendan, you have to promise me once I am home you will be there for me. I don’t know that I can be strong no more by myself."

"I promise you Alex, I will not leave your side until you tell me it is okay."

"Thanks bro, you mean more to me than I ever tell you, but I love you."

"I love you to Alex."

There was a knock at the door.

"Hi, I am Christie from physical therapy. Which one of you handsome guys would be Alex?"

Alex and Brendan both smiled, and Alex raised his hand.

"Well I guess we have an important mission, I was advised to get you on some crutches, so you can go home tomorrow. That is if you can get those buns in gear today." Christie smiled at both boys.

"I will do whatever I have to, if it means I get to go home." Alex stated.

"Okay, let's get this show on the road then Alex, who is this other cutie with you?"

"This is the best little brother anybody could ask for, my brother Brendan."

"Alright, well how about we include Brendan in on your therapy, so he can help you get in and out of bed, and get to the restroom and things like that?"

Brendan smiled nodding his approval, beaming at Alex.

"So, Brendan, if you would come over here, and take Alex under the arm we are going to get him to the edge of the bed...." Christie smiled, "Good job, Alex, here we go keep your weight on the crutches."

Two hours later, Alex was worn out, but had achieved what was expected out of him, and was quite worn out.

"Excellent job Alex, let's get you back in bed, and you can rest."

Brendan helped Alex back into bed crawling in with him, snuggling in with his brother. Both drifted off to sleep until dinner was served.

“How are my boys doing today? Not a very exciting meal of cheeseburgers and fries, but it is one of the better things they serve here.” Nurse Shelly quipped.

Both boys nodded, as they impersonated vacuum cleaners, inhaling their food.

“I hear you are out of here tomorrow Alex, I bet you are excited for that!”

“I guess, I am just glad to have Brendan around, and my other brother Cam.”

“Well, I have other patients to tend to, Alex if I don’t see you again before you go home, I wish you and your family happiness, luck, and love.”

“Thank you, Shelly.”

As the night drew to a close the boys remained inseparable, Brendan continued to cuddle his brother from the nightmares the darkness brought upon him.

Alex squirmed around throughout a restless night of sleep, but Brendan soothed those demons.

As daylight broke, both boys awoke murmuring good morning to each other.

Today was the beginning of a new day, and the beginning of a new chapter in all of their lives.