Can't Stop These Feelings - 1. Life's Cruel

Can't Stop These Feelings

Chapter 1 - Life's Cruel:

Brad recently twenty-one and accepted the fact he was in love with his best friend Jesse. The only problem was Jesse didn't know his feelings, and Brad hoped they could be more than friends.

Brad woke up on a sunny Saturday thinking today he was going to change his life and was going to confess his feelings to Jesse so he picked up his phone dialing the phone, "Hey Jesse you planning on going to the party tonight?" He held his breath hoping, to receive the answer that he wanted.

"Ya, I'll be there, just not sure what time," Jesse said.

"Oh, ok, I guess you don't need a ride then?" Brad asked, hoping that he would.

"No, I'm good dude," Jesse said, hoping that once he met his boyfriend they would remain friends.

"Alright, I guess I will see you tonight then?" Brad felt defeated, things weren't working as he hoped they would.

"Later dude."

Brad hung up his phone and tossed it on his bed. Sighing, he felt as if the world was against him. He recently broke up with the girl he had used as cover because she was trying to make him commit to a more permanent relationship which totally scared the shit out of Brad. A knock at the door interrupted Brad from his sulking mood. "Ya?" Brad said tersely.

Brad's fourteen-year-old brother Nate opened the door, "You okay Brad?" He asked with a cheerful smile.

"Yeah, I'm okay buddy, what you need?" Brad smiled at his brother who was one of his closest friends. He was proud of how close they both were.

"Well I was wondering if you wanted to play some catch, or just hang out together?" Nate asked with the most adorable smile. Brad reached out and ruffled Nate's hair, "Hey watch it, nobody does and that and gets away it!"

Laughing, "Oh, okay tough guy, I guess we can just hang out, it's too hot and I don't want you breaking my arm for messing up your beautiful hair." Brad chuckled to himself.

"Brad, what happened to you and Nicole?" Nate asked innocently, as he sat on Brad's bed.

Brad stiffened and scratched the back of his head debating with himself. "I uh.... Well.... She wanted more than I could ever offer her. I.... I'm gonna be honest Nate and nobody knows this, except for you now, I'm gay." Cringing as the word left his mouth, Brad hoped this would change nothing between his brother and himself.

Nate sat there stunned as the news set in, before finally finding words. "Brad you know I love you, that doesn't mean shit between you and me will ever change. Mom and Dad might be shocked, but I think they would take it okay." He rolled around on the bed to hug Brad. Nate felt Brad's tension fade away almost immediately.

Brad rubbed his eye's and looked at Nate when he was released from the hug, "Thanks, Nate this whole situation me on edge, Nicole was pressuring me to ask her to marry her, and I couldn't pretend anymore. I just about lost my nerve to tell you the truth, but I'm glad I did now. I'm sorta worried about telling Mom and Dad though."

"Brad you are you whether you're straight, gay, or old Mrs. Smitherton." Nate quipped and jumped off the bed, laughing his ass off.

"Why you little shithead!" Brad laughed as he lunged at Nate and got him in a headlock. "So, Nathaniel who is the best big brother in the world?"

Nate squirmed while squealing like a girl, "You are Brad, okay? You really are the best big brother even as gay as you are!" He continued giggling, as Brad tightened his arm like a vice. "Okay, I give you are the best brother honestly Brad, I was just kidding." Brad released Nate and they both sat back down on the bed.

"So, do you think I should tell Mom and Dad?" Brad asked while looking for anything his brother was about to say as a deterrent.

"Brad, Mom, and Dad have always stood beside us in everything we have done in life, so why wouldn't they now?" Nate said with pure love seeping from his soul to his brother.

"Well, you are gonna be there when I do this tonight after supper," Brad stated as a matter of fact.

"Brad you know I will support you," Nate patted Brad's shoulder while smiling.

Brad smiled knowing his brother would be by his side when he broke the news to his parents. With that, the boys turned on the Xbox and started playing some video games, and bantered with one another until their Mom called them to dinner. Nate shot out of the room like a man on a mission, and Brad strolled to what he hoped would be the beginning of a change in the right direction for his life.

Brad sat down in his chair at the dining room table a bit apprehensively but smiled to his Mom and Dad.

Marlene started passing the platters of food around the table asking the boys their day was along with other general conversation. Brad smiled at Nate and cleared his throat. "Mom, Dad, I have something I need to tell you, and I need to just say this so please don't interrupt me until I get this all out. I want you both to know I love you and I don't want to hurt you by what I am about to say.... I.... I'm gay." Brad tried to shrink into his chair, wanting to make a dash for the front door. Brad's Mom sat there quietly rubbing her hands, while his Dad Bart stood up and paced back and forth around the room like a caged animal.

Bart grabbed Brad by the shirt yanking him out of the chair, he drew his arm back and began punching Brad wildly shouting. "I am not having no fag for a son," as punch after punch, and kick after kick had landed all over Brad. "I didn't raise no faggot, why can't you be a normal person like you were raised. I should just kill you now, and save the time of you killing yourself with aids," Bart punched him in the face this time as Brad was struggling to remain conscious. Nate jumped up and grabbed his Dad's arm begging him to stop hitting Brad. Bart released Brad in a huff, and he slid down the wall with blood coming out of his nose and mouth.

Bart stormed out the door, while Marlene grabbed the phone and dialed 9-1-1. "Hello, yes I live at 128 Percy Drive, I need an ambulance and the police. My husband, well soon to be ex-husband assaulted my oldest son, he is barely conscious. Yes, my husband left, yes Brad is breathing. Okay, Nate keep Brad calm, and still honey. I need to run over to the Horneman's and see if they can watch the house while we go to the hospital." As she hung up the phone and rushed out the door.

Nate cradled his brothers head in his lap wiping the blood from Brad's face with his hands while he cried, "Brad don't leave.... Please, please don't leave me, Brad." Nate continued to wipe the never-ending blood from his face and kissed his forehead.

After what seemed to be forever the ambulance arrived and placed Brad on a backboard and started an IV and rushed to get him to the ambulance. Once inside the driver slammed the doors shut, with lights flashing and sirens blaring it sped off toward the hospital, leaving a stunned Nate standing in the street while police officers questioned his mother.

Nate stood in the street in a state of shock until a police officer noticed him standing there shaking. "Son come over here and have a seat," the officer pointed to the rear seat of his cruiser leaving the door open. The officer retrieved a bottle of water from his lunch bag in the car and handed it to Nate who took a few sips of water.

Nate rubbed his eyes, "When can I go see Brad, and what are you doing about my asshole of a father?" He asked sternly.

The officer cleared his throat as Nate stood and looked him squarely in the eyes, "Son you can go see Brad as soon as the other officer finishes getting the information he needs. We have already placed a warrant for his arrest, so don't worry we will catch him."

Nate stood stoically and stated, "I'm not worried about the asshole I don't have a dad anymore. My only concern is my brother, and I wanna get to him now!"

Marlene walked over trying to calm Nate, "Honey calm down, getting upset isn't going to help this situation."

Nate was on the verge of tears again and said, "You don't get it this is all my fault, I told Brad to trust both of you and he did. If he didn't tell you guys, he would be fine and be going to the party with Jesse tonight."

"Baby none of this was your fault, your father is completely to blame for this. He is a narrow-minded hateful individual that I evidentially never even knew." Marlene wiped her eyes with a handkerchief." Are you done with the police, so we can go check on Brad?" Nate rambled off before stopped with tears in his eyes and then mumbling, “I gotta see him, and apologize for not doing more to protect him, I just couldn’t believe what was happening so it took me a bit to move.”

"Nate, you know Brad won't blame you, baby, he loves you as much as you do him, plus he wouldn't have wanted you to get hurt to stop your father," Marlene said as she pulled him into hug rubbing his back. Marlene thought to herself both of her sons were hurt in different ways, and she was struggling with her own emotions.

Turning to the police officer Marlene placed a smile the best she could on her face asking, “Officers do you need me for anything else, or may we go to the hospital?” The officers wished her the best, and swore to catch Bart, and prosecute him to the fullest extent of the law.

Marlene and Nate went to their car and made the tension-filled drive with little words to be said. Nate stared out the window to hide his tears from his Mom but didn't hide the sniffling, which Marlene didn’t say a word about. Pulling into the hospital, Marlene parked in a spot reserved for emergency patients. Nate hopped out of the car before it was stopped heading rapidly towards the emergency entrance in his blood covered clothes, Marlene finished parking and chased down Nate.

Reaching the reception desk Marlene asked for information on Brad, but the receptionist stated somebody would be with her shortly. Nate and Marlene walked to the waiting area and sat together both saying silent prayers for Brad. Nate got up and paced back and forth in the waiting area, as the tension was getting unbearable. After what seemed like forever, a doctor appeared asking for Brad’s family to follow him.

Once inside a conference room, Doctor Barnes shook both Marlene and Nate’s hands after introducing himself and stated “Brad is one very hurt young man, he has three broken ribs, a broken right arm, a broken nose, and a severely bruised abdomen. I have him on some very strong pain meds, barring any complications tonight, he should be able to go home tomorrow. Brad will have some severe pain for the next few weeks from his ribs, he doesn’t appear to need surgery. We have reset his arm and cast it, and set his nose. Brad will have some difficulty breathing from both the broken nose and broken ribs. Any questions?”

Nate cleared his throat with tears threatening to fall and barely whispered, “When can I see my brother?” Marlene placed her arm around Nate rubbing his back.

“Young man your brother is on his way to room 312 as we speak, so if you both take the elevator to the third floor and follow the signs to his room you may see him now, although he will be groggy from the pain medication he is on. My only concern is not only for Brad, but the safety for the both of you as I understand from the police these injuries were inflicted by his father. So, the only question is where you plan on staying, once Brad is released? I have arranged for the both of you to stay in his room tonight since there is an extra bed in his room and a recliner, it’s better than a car tonight.” The doctor looked to Marlene for an answer to his question.

Marlene rubbed her head with her free hand. "We will either get a room at a hotel or make arrangements to stay with family." The doctor nodded and wished them well.

Nate practically dragged Marlene through the hospital to Brad's room. Nate opened the door and gasped before he walked to the far side of the bed and grabbed Brad’s hand. Marlene stood and cried while she looked at Brad’s battered body. Nate grabbed the recliner with his free hand and yanked it towards himself and took a seat never releasing the life he made with Brad.Marlene looked towards Nate putting on strong front, “Nate why don’t you take the bed honey, you have to be worn out from all of the chaos.”

“No way am I leaving Brad’s side Mom, I failed to protect him once I’m not doing it to him again. Plus the asshole is still on the loose!” Nate said with absolute venom in his words.

"Honey, you know the police warned the hospital about your father already," Marlene said as she walked around the bed and placed her hand on Nate’s shoulder.

"I don't care, Mom, I’m not moving.” Nate steeled himself as he prepared for his night watch duty.

Marlene sighed, and made her way to the empty bed, crawling in and pulling the covers up. She looked towards he sons and a tear escaped, “Nate you’re a brave boy whether you think it or not, and I’m proud of you even with the language you’ve been using. I love the both of you if you need anything while I'm asleep, just wake me okay?” She smiled with pride at both of her sons.

Nate gave his Mom a brief smile. "Thanks, Mom, I love you too, goodnight." He reached behind himself and grabbed a folded blanket and opened it laying it over his legs dozing off to sleep.

Nate was awakened from his sleep as the door creaked open, rubbing his eyes he was startled to see the asshole standing there with a knife. ”HELP! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU ASSHOLE, YOU HURT BRAD ENOUGH JUST BECAUSE HE LOVES GUYS YOU SICK BASTARD!” Nate screamed with vengeance lunging over the bed towards his father. Bart swung the knife wildly catching Nate on the forearm, as security enter the room tackling Bart, leaving Nate laying on the floor grasping his arm.

Marlene made a dash to Nate applying pressure to his arm, “Oh baby, I’m so sorry he hurt you too.” Marlene kissed his forehead as she cried.

The security guards placed Bart in handcuffs and was escorting him out of the room, as a nurse came running in with gauze, who was also being followed by Brad’s doctor.

“Young man your actions were both brave and dangerous, now how about walking over here and having a seat so I can take a look at that arm.” The doctor said as he pointed to the chair Nate had once resided in. The doctor looked at the arm and instructed the nurse he needed a suture kit and sterile dressings. Once he had the required supplies, he sutured Nate’s arm. “There you go son, in approximately ten days just go to your family doctor and he can remove the sutures. However, no more playing hero until then.” The doctor smiled and patted him on the back as he left the room.

Nate had no choice as to where he was sleeping this time as Marlene was now terrified for both of her sons. “Nathan John Harris get your ass in that bed and rest, it’s my turn to protect the both of you.” Marlene had tears streaming down her face, while she pointed towards the empty bed. Marlene sat in the recliner and maintained a vigilant watch over her children the remainder of the night.