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2021 - Spring - On The Road Entry
Not Enough Road - 1. Chapter 1
Johnny had only been gone for a couple of months now, but it already felt like years to me. I mean, It's not like I didn't expect it or see it coming. My older brother packed up all of his stuff and trekked his way out to college at the end of the Summer, just like the rest of his friends. His college looked pretty cool, but it was at least a three or four hour ride away from the rest of the family. And I'll never admit it openly, but the house really does feel somewhat 'empty' without him here. It kind of...well...it sucks, to be honest.
It sort of makes me wonder if I just miss him calling me names or randomly punching me in the shoulder...occasionally surprising me with a finger flick to the nuts...or if I just missed the ability to antagonize him to do it whenever I got the chance. Because, let's be serious here...I kind of liked knowing that I had the power to get under his skin from time to time. He was bigger and stronger than me, physically...so fucking with his head was my only retaliation. And I enjoyed that. Hehehe! I guess you have to grab your sense of self empowerment wherever you can find it, right?
Still...I felt the void of not having him around. And now that I was going through my closet to pack some of my best clothes into a mini suitcase to finally take my very first bus trip out to stay with Johnny on campus for the first time? I couldn't be more excited. I just...ugh! I missed his energy, you know? Even his negative energy was something that I thrived on while he was here. I'm only 14...so it'll be years before I even get to experience college for myself. But I was kind of hoping that things would be different with Johnny, and he'd still be here for a little while longer. Especially now, when my thoughts are getting...increasingly difficult. 'Complicated'. You know?
Don't get me wrong. I knew I was gay by the time I was ten years old and my dad was showing me old reruns of 'Johnny Quest' on Cartoon Network. Is it weird that my very first HUGE crush was on a blond haired cartoon character? I don't know. Probably. But it's the truth. Old school 'Johnny Quest' episodes were my first experiences with getting my private parts to tingle in an unfamiliar way. Hehehe! Go figure.
My parents don't know...but my brother does. Apparently, I wasn't all that hard to figure out once he started examining my habits. Something as simple as pausing to look at the living room TV whenever there was a really cute boy on a sitcom or in some random commercial...it just tipped him off almost immediately. One day, he was just like, "Dude...wait...Jamison, are you gay?" And I don't know if it was a moment of weakness or just a frightened reaction...but I sort of nodded my head. And then I started crying my eyes out. To this day, I can't even tell you why I did it. But I was so emotionally overwhelmed by the release of this secret...apparently, much bigger than I previously thought that it was...the tears came raining down without restraint. And he embraced me. He really did. After all of the times that I broke his toys or tattled to Mom about the stuff he did to me...as many playful punches that we've traded over the years since we were little kids...he just held me in his arms and told me that everything was going to be ok. And then promised me that he wouldn't tell Mom and Dad until I felt ready to tell them myself...something that hasn't quite happened yet, but I'm working up to it.
I just feel like we became closer as brothers that day. I found a whole new love for him that I didn't know I had before. Just by having him understand. That filled my life with a sense of joy and validation that I didn't even realize that I was missing until he exposed me to the light.
And now...he's gone away...
So far away...
Moving on with a life that doesn't really concern me anymore. My living, breathing, confessional had left me behind. Like I said, I sort of knew that this was coming, but I didn't really expect it to happen so fast. You know...being left here all alone.
"Jamison? We've got to leave soon!" My dad called out to me from the side door to the house.
"I'm coming! Just need to power up my laptop a little bit more." I hollered back.
"Well, the bus leaves in two hours. It's going to take us at least twenty five to forty five minutes to get you to the Greyhound bus station. That's assuming that traffic is on our side. They're not going to wait if you show up late."
"I know. I know..." I said. "...Let me just grab a couple of things, and I'll be right there."
I made sure that I had all of my stuff together and zipped my suitcase up tight. I know that it was only for one weekend, but I'm packing for three or four different situations here. What if it rains? What if we go to the movies? What if I need an extra pair of sneakers? Oh shit...yeah, let me take my black sneakers! Almost forgot those! Stuff to read in my laptop or my cell phone batteries burn out on me. Oooh, where's that body spray stuff that smells so good? I should take that too...
"Jamison!"
"COMING! Ok..." I said, taking one last look around my room to make sure that I wasn't forgetting anything. I think I got it all. Omigod, it's going to be so cool to spend some time with Johnny again! I can't wait! Plus, I kind of want to see what college life is like. From everything that I've seen in the movies and on TV, it looks like it would be a nonstop party, 24/7! How cool would that be? Up until this point, the most rip-roaring good time that I've even been invited to was Micah's Bar Mitzvah six months ago. Fun, sure! But I imagine that college parties must be on a whole other level of awesome!
Just as I was bringing my little suitcase downstairs as well as my carry-on bag of activities to protect me from the utter boredom of driving from Chicago to Southern Illinois with nothing but a flat, monotonous, landscape of cornfields and cow pastures for the next few hours until I reach my destination. Trust me...it'll drive you crazy after the first thirty minutes. It's about as interesting as watching a snail trying to speed its way over a plank of wood covered in peanut butter. Ugh!
My mom gave me the last minute check before she packed a sandwich, some chips, and a fruit cup with a few plastic utensils, and a couple of sodas. "You've got your toothbrush and mini toothpaste tube?"
"Yes, mom."
"Extra underwear and clean socks?"
"I got it all, Mom. I'll be fine, ok?"
"Deodorant? And an extra pair of shoes...?"
"YES, Mom. Quit it."
"Fix your hair, honey. You look a little frizzy..." She said, running her hands through my short blond hair as I tried to keep from cringing for a few seconds. Just long enough for her to satisfy her weird sense of last minute motherly duties. Geez! Like I couldn't do all of this stuff myself without her help.
"Babe, he looks fine. Quit fussing over the boy Come on, we've got to get moving. Let's pack it up." My dad said. Thank goodness for the uch needed save. But I still couldn't get out of there without a tight hug and kiss on the forehead.
"You be careful out there, ok, sweetie?" She said, squeezing me tight.
"Mom! I'll be fine, ok? I'll be back on Sunday. It's just a weekend."
"I know. You're...you can take care of yourself. Still, be careful. Do it for me, alright?"
"I will." I smiled. And she finally let me go just as my dad took the suitcase out to the car. "Seeya later!" I said with a wave, and she walked to the door to watch my dad and I get in the car and pull out of the driveway. She still looked a bit concerned, but I was too excited to spend time with my brother, Johnny, to really let it get to me. The sooner I'm on that bus by myself, the better. I have to admit, this was a bit of an adventure for me. I don't think I've ever gone further away from my house on my own than the local movie theater before. And I had to seriously put in some work to get my mom to be emotionally ready for me to even take that baby step towards my own independence. Now I'm, like...going out of town. How cool is this??? Hehehe! Something about it just made me feel liberated, you know? A little bit more 'grown up' than what I was used to. I liked it. The freedom of it gave me a series of goosebumps that I was really hoping my dad wouldn't see while he was driving me to the bus station, downtown.
No need to make him nervous or anything, right?
I'm nervous enough for the both of us.
He made me repeat the long list of traveling rules that my parents had given me going down there and coming back. Be early, never late. Don't leave any of my bags unattended for even a split second, even if I'm just going to the bathroom. Stay away from strangers of all types, no matter what they say. And my brother has been given strict instructions to be the ONLY one to pick me up when I get down there. And my mom will be the ONLY one to pick me up when I get back. No substitutions. Keep my cell phone charged to at lest 50% at all times, and call if anything goes even slightly off the rails. I personally thought it was a bit excessive, myself, as I learned all of this stuff by the time I was in the fifth grade...but I suppose a little refresher gave me something to think about to keep my nerves settled until I was actually sitting on the bus and comfortably lost in my own world for the following three hours or so.
When he dropped me off in front of the station, he made sure to ask, "Now, you're SURE that you've got everything that you need to take with you, right?"
"Of course. I told you, I'm fine."
"Bus ticket? Let me see it."
"Dad..."
"C'mon, Jamison...show me the goods." He demanded with a grin. So I reached in my pocket and sarcastically waved it around a few times to make sure that he saw it. I asked if he was happy, and he replied, "Very happy. Yes. You be careful, ok? Have a safe trip, and call home the second you get there."
"I will."
"Love you."
"Love you too..." I mumbled softly, hoping that nobody else around me actually heard that. Then I shut the door and hurried inisde before was able to think up some other way to embarrass me. And then....freedom. Sweet freedom.
I was shaking a little bit, but I couldn't tell if it was from excitement, or just from the anxiety of not knowing what was going to happen next. I had an idea, but didn't know what to expect for sure. It was a good anxiety though. Kind of like that feeling you feel on your first day at a new school when you have to figure out what cafeteria table to sit at for lunch so the other kids won't run you off. I'll survive. Just got to take a moment to shake out my jitters first.
I stood in line at the bus window and held my ticket in my hand, silently rehearsing my verbal approach in my head so I could talk to the cashier without looking like some kind of a total geek. Luckily, it was this really nice lady who took one look at me and realized that I probably needed a little nod in the right direction. Maybe it was the high pitch of my shaky voice, who knows? Either way, she pretended not to notice. "Ticket to the 3:30 bus to Champaign, Illinois, please."
She smiled at me, checked everything out, and handed me back a stamped stub. "Alright, honey. You're all set. Just head right on over to Terminal 16, have a seat, and listen for your bus number to know when they're ready to start boarding, ok?"
"Oh. O-O-Ok...just...like, over there...?"
"Straight down the hall, past the coffee shop and the vending machines, it'll be there on your left."
"Ok. I see it. Thanks." I said, and wheeled my luggage down the hall to see if I could find a spot. Looking around me, this place looks so much bigger from the inside than it ever did from the outside. And there were an awful lot of people walking around. Even with signs everywhere telling me where to go, it still felt like I was lost anyway. I guess this traveling stuff takes some getting used to when you're alone. Ok...coffee shop....vending machines...there it is. Terminal 16. So far, so good. I'll just check in, and then I'll get my laptop out...pass the time with a movie or something, or just some music, until it was time to go. I'll turn the volume down low so I can make sure to hear them call over the intercom or whatever. I wish I could use my phone, but...I promised to keep it charged up. Even though everybody else in the whole are seemed to be staring down at their mini screens like a bunch of zombie hunchbacks or something. Anything to avoid human contact, I suppose.
I found myself a nice little spot at the end of a row of seats up against the wall, facing the desk so I could see if people started rustling and getting up to board the bus without me. Just in case. Even when I'm listening for an announcement, I have a tendency to get a little wrapped up in what I'm doing sometimes.
I opened up my laptop, keeping my suitcase between my legs to make sure that nobody could snatch it or anything. And I was firing everything up to see what I had downloaded on my hard drive to entertain me for the time being...when I heard a little bit of a ruckus coming from over by the check in desk. Nothing major, but it was enough to catch my attention.
It was a woman in a dark flowered dress, talking about how much she was going to 'miss' somebody this weekend, and another woman was standing right next to her that looked so much like her that I assumed they had to be related somehow. The slightly overenthusiastic theatrics was like a semi-laugh, mixed with a mock laugh. Then I saw her making loud kissing noises and giving hugs to somebody that I couldn't see on the other side of her. This was followed by a series of light giggles and then a bit of a struggle as the other person tried to put some space between them before she smothered them to death.
"Mom! It's one weekend. Calm down. Shhhh! Hehehe!" Said the voice a bit louder. A boyish voice. but a little bit deeper than mine.
"I know, I know. But it feels like you're going to be so far away from me. It's going to drive me crazy." She looked over at the other woman and said, "Your Auntie Selma says the same thing. The house is going to be too quiet with you gone."
"I thought that was supposed to be a good thing?" The boy had a cute laugh, but I still couldn't really see him all that well with his two 'human shields' in the way. "Seriously, Mom...I'll be fine. You know I will."
Hehehe, it looks like another poor victim of my own minor frustrations before leaving the house. Hang in there, buddy. I know the feeling, believe me.
And then...just as he was able to take a step or two backwards...he finally came into view. And, I...I just...
Look...I might be gay, but I've never been one of those super horny, boy crazy, predator types. I don't drool all over myself every time I see a sexy boy at school, or some young celebrity...with the exception of a few. I'd consider myself more of a heavy romantic. Basically, if I don't know the other boy personally, then what is there to love outside of a pretty face? You know?
But this boy was...different, somehow.
Not overly 'made up' or dressed to the 9's in the fanciest, high top, fashion. In fact, it looked like he woke up like that this morning, and would just stay pretty all day long until he went back to bed again. I mean, like...he was just the right kind of 'cute'. Does that make sense? He's, like, the reason that people have to occasionally remind you that it's impolite to stare. He looked like he was about my age, but with dark brown hair that matched his eye color to perfection. Slim in build, but had a little more meat to him than I did, making me feel a bit scrawny in comparison. Not by much, but a little bit. Something about that level of 'cute' makes me a little bit hypersensitive about myself sometimes. A smile that almost seemed to bring certain shame to the artificial lights lining the ceiling above us...and the small dot of a beauty mark just above his right, upper, lip. He was such an awe-inspiring sight to behold without warning. He was just the kind of lovely surprise that gave your life meaning once you got a glimpse of it. He was just...wow.
"Are you sure that you don't want us to stay here with you until the bus comes? We can stay!" His mother asked him.
"Nooooo...you're gonna get towed! And then a ticket on top of it." He said. "Go. I'm cool. Promise."
"Ok, Diego. I'll see you when you come home. BUT, if you want to come home early, you call me or Selma and we will jump in the car and come get you. OK? Right away." She told him.
"You won't have to rescue me from any of my fun this weekend. Trust me." He grinned. Oh man...his smile. It actually made me smile too, and I didn't even know why. Just a contagious reaction, I suppose. Like a yawn, or...a sudden semi-hard erection.
"Ok, sweetie!" She said, both women giving him a few more kisses before he found himself having to swat them away again. "Are you sure that you don't want anything?"
"Don't go in my room while I'm gone..." He giggled, and he gave them a hug before they said their final goodbyes and finally left him to wait in the terminal by himself. Reluctantly.
I'd be lying if I said that I didn't watch him for a little bit. I mean, seeing this boy clearly through a game of quick, furtive, glances was definitely more exciting than anything that I could possibly have playing on my laptop. I still had my earbuds in, but I turned them way waaaay down, just in case he said something. Not even to me, but to anybody else. Or if he laughed. Or...maybe if he coughed or something. I don't know, I just longed for him to do something...anything...like one of those main attractions at the zoo. Gosh, he was fascinating.
His skin had this really cool, light gold, blush to it. And he always gently brushed some of the longer locks of his hair out of his eyes every few minutes...whether it was really blocking his vision or not. Heh, his hair wasn't even rally that long to begin with, but it was just enough to dip down below his eyebrows to tenderly touch the ends of his long lashes. He did as if it was just by habit, and always with his right hand...never his left. A cute gesture of his that I simply couldn't stop looking at.
I didn't even realize that I had stopped breathing until his eyes randomly glanced up and connected with mine from half way across Terminal 16. And that was only because the sudden gasp that I made while forcing my eyes back down to the movie on my laptop replenished me with the oxygen that I was obviously lacking a few seconds ago.
Oh WOW, he was cute! Is it okay to take another peek at him yet? Probably not. I'm going to look like some kind of weird bus station creep if I do it too soon. But...I could still feel my heart beating super fast...craving another look. It had only been a minute or two, and I already had an emotional dependency on gazing at him like a baby at bright colors. What the heck is wrong with me? I'm not usually like this.
Ok...I'm starved for another look now. I'm going to look. I have to. I'll make it quick. Promise.
I tried to casually lift my eyes up from my laptop screen, looking way over to my left first, and then slowly turning my head to the right to make it look like I was just randomly scanning the room, and not targeting him specifically. Not the best of strategies, but what else was I going to come up with on such short notice? So, I sort of glanced over him, and he was looking down at his cell phone just like everybody else, causing me to breathe a sigh of relief. I didn't want to get caught again in such a short span of time. I'm being a perv right now, I know...but it''s kind of fun in his case.
Then I saw him gathering up his stuff and I got a bit worried that he might move to a place where I wouldn't be able to get a good look at him like I had been over the past...wow...have I really been peeking at him, on and off, for a whole ten minutes? It hardly seems like it was that long. I was just...wait...OMIGOD! He's coming this way! No! No no no no no! What is he doing? Why is he coming closer? What did I do? Is he going to totally call me out for being a homo? Is he going to scream it out all over the bus station? Especially in this particular Terminal? I'm going to have to spend over three hours on the road with these people! Please don't! Please, oh please, oh PLEASE, don't do that!
Holy shit! I almost wanted to grab my stuff and get up to run, but my suitcase was still between my legs, and I started fidgeting and fumbling in some weird attempt to look casual as he came closer. Even though I couldn't be more uncomfortable if I had suddenly been splattered with an ice cold bucket of wet cement.
"Hi..." He said. Is he talking to ME? To ME? What do I say?
"Hey, hehehe...s'up?" I said, nervously. I wasn't ready to follow up that greeting with anything significant, so I hope he was willing to let the ball bounce in his court and hit it back to me in a way that wouldn't cause me to lose whatever game he might be playing here.
There was an extended pause between us, and I had to look away from the chestnut glory of his beautiful eyes before they mesmerized me to the point of losing what little control I had left. And just as I was about to say something stupid, he was like, "Say, do you mind if I plug in for a bit?"
"Plug...plug in?" I asked.
"My charger. There's a plug right there by your seat. I just wanted to ask first before just coming over here and crowding your personal space and stuff." He smiled. I didn't even realize that I was sitting next to an outlet until he nodded in its direction and showed it to me.
"OH! Yeah! Go ahead. I don't mind." I said, trying to keep my nervous giggles to a minimum. I swear, my heart was beating even harder than it was before. He was soooo close! Like...when he got down on one knee to plug his charger in...I found it hard to breathe. Just knowing that I could have reached out at that very moment and ran my fingers through those shiny brown locks of his was almost enough to send me into a fit of love stricken tremors that I wasn't sure that I wasn't fully sure I'd be able to bring myself back from once they got started.
Don't look at his butt. Don't look at his butt. Oh God...he's got such a nice butt! Even in jeans. It was hard not to sigh out loud. He makes the stretched denim look like a pair of thin pajamas. It was really really nice! I hope nobody saw me doing that. How did this get so awkward all of a sudden? This is so crazy.
Thank God I was able to hold my laptop over my...ummmm...well my lap. That might have been an even more embarrassing situation than it needed to be.
The boy stood back up and flashed me a smile. "Thanks, man. I'm sure it won't take long. My battery charges up pretty quick." He said.
"Uh huh...it's...its ok." I stammered.
Then, much to my surprise, he sat down in the seat right next to me. "You don't mind, do ya? I can't wander too far away from my phone. Some weirdo will snatch it. So I've gotta keep it in my sights at all times."
"Oh believe me, I know. My mom and dad grilled me with the same lecture before I left the house too. So, I totally get it." I told him.
"Really, now? So, I take it this is your first big bus trip then?" He asked.
"Am I that obvious?" I said, blushing a little as I found myself being hypnotized by his eyes again. And then he lightly brushed his hair back again. Right hand...never his left.
"It's ok. It's sorta my first big trip on a bus too. Well...not really. I've taken this long trip before at least two other times, but this is the first time that I'm doing it by myself without my mom and auntie with me. There's really nothing to sweat about it, though. You get on the bus, you put your bags up, and if you're lucky enough...you'll sleep through half of the trip. It's not as long as it seems like it'll be."
"I don't know..." I grinned. "...At the risk of sounding a bit weird, I'm a little anxious about the whole thing. I doubt I'll be able to sleep much. I wanna see everything."
He laughed at me. "Believe me, man...there's downtown Chicago, and then there's the college at the other end of the trip. In between? Nothing but flat streets, grass, and a whole lotta cornfields. Hehehe! If you see a few herds of cows along the way, or maybe some rain clouds? That'll be the epitome of excitement for us over the next few hours. That's why I'm charging up now. There's no worse fate than being bored to death on a bus with a bathroom the size of a refrigerator box."
He made me laugh. Where I was once feeling so clumsy with every word and attempt at boyish wit that managed to accidentally fall out of my mouth...he was a total natural. He made it look so easy to just pick up a conversation and run with it as though he owned it from the very beginning. I kind of admired that.
"Drats. I was hoping for a bit more adventure. I guess, I had my hopes up a little high, then?"
"Maybe just a little. Unless we run across a tornado or something."
"A WHAT now?" I asked, wondering if he was kidding or not. He laughed at my reaction...but he didn't exactly say that wasn't a possibility.
That's when he stuck his hand out towards me, that bright smile of his giving me goosebumps. "Diego, man."
"Ummm, oh. Jamison. Hi." I said, making one of the fastest friends that I ever made in my life. Hehehe! "So...the bus is making a few stops before getting all the way to the college. Where are you getting off?"
"End of the line, baby. I'm going to Champaign." Diego smiled proudly.
"Omigod! Me too!" I was wiggling in my seat now.
"Really?" He asked. "You look a little young for college, dude. Hehehe!"
"Nah, I'm just visiting my big brother for the weekend. That's all. I'm just starting high school, to be honest."
"Yeah. Me too. It's a bit intimidating, but so far, it's already much better than Junior High. That place sucked, big time."
"I KNOW, right? That place was a living, breathing, torture chamber for boys like me. I despised every moment of it." I said.
"Boys like you? Hehehe! How do you mean?" Diego asked, and I immediately clammed up. UGH! Ok...maybe I'm getting a little bit TOO comfortable, TOO fast!
"I'm...it's nothing. Just...yeah. Forget it." I said, struggling to look for something else that might distract him from taking that particular off ramp right now. I'm having fun. And Diego appears to be having fun. Why ruin it by being so hopelessly abnormal. You know?
Which sucks. Because he's sooooo cute to me! He really is! It would be really cool if I could just let him know about me without worrying about the consequences.
"Well, whatever it was, I hope high school makes it better for you. And I'm thinking that college will be even better than that! Oh man, I'm SO ready! Just have to wait another few years, I guess." Diego said, practically bouncing in his chair. Oh wow, he was so adorable! Hahaha!
"I was thinking the same thing. But I don't know yet for sure. This is my first trip out there. Or to any college campus. Not just by myself, but, like...ever."
Diego's eyes widened, and if you though his dark brown eyes were sexy before, they were truly tempting me to tackle him to the bus station carpet and start kissing him on the mouth NOW! "Oh wow, college looks like it friggin' ROCKS, man! You only have to go to two or three classes a DAY! And that's only a few times a week! Then you get to party and hang out with your friends! No parents, cool roommates, and living in your own space with your own stuff...? It sounds like the coolest thing ever!"
"Well, you certainly sold me? Hehehe! You sure you're not a part of the college recruiting team?" I said. My voice kind of wavered a little bit, but it didn't squeak. So I was thankful for that. I didn't want to go through all of those awkward pitch changes in front of Diego.
"I can't wait to go! I think it would be awesome!" He said, practically smothering me in his infectious charisma. And then there was a 'jump scare' and a loud noise that came from the movie that I was sort of watching/not watching on my laptop that startled the shit out of me. I forgot that I had even turned that thing on. "You alright?"
"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I forgot this movie was even on. Just surprised me, that's all."
"Really, whatchya watching?" Diego asked, leaning over to take a look at my screen. God, he smelled good. Like a fresh sprinkle of powdered sugar and a dab of cinnamon on the surface of a fresh batch of donuts that were just taken out of the oven less than a minute or two ago. No kidding! That's what it reminded me of imediately. "Whoah! What is THAT???" He asked, seeing a random woman on the screen being ripped apart by a giant monster. "Holy shit, dude!"
Blushing hard, I said, "Sorry. Yeah, I'm a bit of a horror movie buff. So...I have a bit of a dark side. I watch this kinda stuff...even in the middle of the day. Heh..." I was hoping that Diego didn't think that was too strange to want to sit next to me anymore.
Luckily, he said, "Oh man, me too! The more gore, the better! But I like just random creepy stuff too. I don't recognize this one though. Which one is it?"
Smiling nervously, I told him, "This one is an indie film, but the practical effects are SO cool. It's about a demon in the streets that finds a host, uses them up, and then rips them apart when he's through with them. I've only seen part one, though. This one is part two."
"Sweet!" He said. "Do you mind if I watch it with you? Do you have an earphone splitter thingy?"
"Unfortunately, I don't. But you can share my earbuds with me if you want." I didn't even realize what I was saying until the words had already left my mouth and Diego was accepting the offer. I mean...what now? You know? I had to give it to him. I couldn't take back my comments now. So...I gave him the earbud out of my left ear...and he put it in his right ear right away so he could hear what was going on. The only thing was...my earbuds didn't really stretch very far. And my laptop screen wasn't really all that big. So that meant that we both had to lean in towards one another to watch and listen and...oh God...we were almost touching cheeks. That drove me CRAZY inside!!!
I'm serious! I don't usually do this! I'm not...like...boys don't often turn me all upside down like Diego is right now! But...there's something about him that's affecting every cell of my teenage biology by being this close to me, and I can't get it to stop. Don't get me wrong...it's not that I'm having any issues with enjoying being in such close proximity with a cute and dreamy boy like this. It's just...I feel like I'm going to ruin the whole vibe if I say or do something to tip him off to the fact that I'm totally falling in love with him already. How did this even happen? We've known each other for all of about fifteen minutes at this point, but...as much as I want to write this off as a random crush or some silly infatuation that'll wear off as soon as I get off of the bus later...I couldn't. This actually ached inside. I ACHED for him in a way that I've never ached for another boy ever before. Is it just because he's so cute? Should I just get a grip and accept that this is a ten minute fantasy at best? I can go home, jack off a few times about the idea of us being locked in an intimate embrace, our arms and legs tangled up together as we slide our tongues together and moan in pleasure from the feel of his erect hardness grinding up against mine. But...that'll be the end of it, right? It's not like anything is going to exceed those expectations with a random cute boy that I met at a Chicago bus station on a Friday afternoon. I'd be silly to believe in that kind of fairy tale.
And yet...as he sat next to me, enjoying the 'gore-ific' horror film that I decided to download and bring with me...smiling...laughing...just expressing his joy in ways that I found enticing to the point of almost losing my self control again...I truly began to contemplate the idea of love at first sight. Which is weird, because I didn't think that such a thing could possibly exist. Or was simply misinterpreted by people who were desperate to get laid by someone that they thought was too hot to let them go without, at least, giving it a shot. But I was actually feeling this irresistible 'pull' in his direction, and I didn't really know what to do with the feeling. Like...when you're hungry, you go and grab something to eat. When you're sleepy, you lay down and go to sleep. With Diego...the idea of being close to him was just as much of an essential need for me...and yet I had no way to satisfy that urge to fix it. What do I do? I'm...I'm so lost right now.
"Omigod! Hahaha! He ripped that guy's arm off at the shoulder!" Diego grinned. "Did he just take a BITE out of the arm in his hand? That's not a turkey leg! Hehehe, that's just rude!"
"Hehehe...yeah..." I said, trembling with fear. I turned my head to look at him...and he had this big smile on his face...and my heart began to beat faster as I thought about just leaning over to give him a kiss on the cheek. Just one. His cheek looked so soft. So smooth. His skin, practically glowing as if it had been lightly brushed with a glaze of warm honey. I should...I should just...
"Now boarding Number 756. Now boarding Number 756. Please have your ticket stubs ready." Came a voice from the check in desk, and just like that, my moment with Diego was broken.
"Dang it! This was just getting good." He said. "Pause it for a second..."
I stopped the movie as he got up to unplug his charger and phone from the socket in the wall. This time I was a bit more brazen about staring openly at the sensual curve of his ass when he bent over. It actually made me hard to imagine what it must look like without those stupid clothes in the way. It was so hot. And it wiggles a little bit, like a puppy tail, when he's on his knees like that.
It nearly broke my heart to see him gathering the rest of his stuff together and started packing it all up. But then, with friendliest grin, he asked me, "Hey! You wanna sit together on the bus? I kinda wanna see how that movie ends."
YES!!! "Oh....yeah, sure." I tried to say, shrugging my shoulder as if I honestly thought that it would make me look all the more nonchalant about it. Even when, truth be told, if I knew how to turn a back flip...I would have done ten of them in a row.
I can remember feeling my hands shaking as I picked up my carry-on bag and mini suitcase, walking to follow him up to the gate. I had my ticket stub and everything ready, just like they said, but my brain was a total scramble at the moment. As we stood in line, I found myself staring blankly at the back of Diego's neck. No real reason, I was just...focused on it. Fine little hairs, and a bit of his naked shoulders...teasing me just as they ducked underneath the material of his T-shirt. Whenever he turned around to briefly talk to me, I had to shake myself out of my trance and just do my best to keep from falling for him too hard all at once. I was rolling down a very steep slope, and as much as I wanted to slam the brakes on my runaway emotions...all it did was force me to spin further and further out of control.
This can't be love. Or anything even close to it. But it feels like it. It really does.
Had it really only been an hour? Because I felt like I've known him my whole life already.
"Let's go to the back!" Diego said, cheerfully bouncing on his heels as soon as we boarded. I followed right behind, struck speechless by easy it was for us to get along. Maybe he was just happy to have somebody to talk to during this extended trip too. His exuberance was so contagious. It made me giggle out loud as he gave me the window seat, just in case I wanted to see anything outside. I know he said that the landscape was pretty boring, but it'll still be brand new to me, so who knows? Maybe I'll enjoy it. Besides, being the hopelessly addicted urban city boy that I am...it's not like I get to see many cows and cornfields all that often.
I started the movie back up where we left off, and we shared earbuds again, just like we did in the terminal. It seemed like we were sitting even closer to one another than we were before, and my heart was beating so hard that I began to wonder if he could hear it thundering, even over the building climax of the movie. That only added to the thrill of the bus actually pulling out of the station and turning out onto the street to start my very first long road trip away from home. As crazy as I was for Diego and all...a part of me wanted to mentally and emotionally document this moment to remember for later. It's a part of my personal history now. A page in the book of the story of my life that I hope I'll be able to tell somebody special someday.
"Hehehe, this movie is great. Where did you even find something like this, Jamison? I'm gonna get online and see if I can find it for download or somethin'." Diego said, his shoulder lightly bumping mine. I'm sure that it was just the movement of the bus that made him do it...but I got a temporary thrill out of it, regardless.
"There's this horror website that I go to, and they have tons of really cool stuff. Short films too. I watch it all the time, and I trust their judgement, so their suggestions are usually pretty spot on. I can give you the site addy if you want." I said.
He smiled at me, looking at me with those giant dark brown marbles of his, and he said, "Please do. I'd like that. I've apparently been missing out on a lot of good stuff."
"Well, my brother, Johnny, and I kinda grew up watching this stuff. We used to sneak into the basement when our parents were asleep, fire up the cable, and go straight to the horror and thriller stuff. Classics first, and then into the PG-13 horror era...which is ok, but it's not like the good stuff. And now we're back to good ol' R-Rated blood and guts. Just like it was meant to be. Hehehe!" That made Diego smile again. He had the most inviting smile of any boy that I've ever met before. Especially when it was in full bloom like that. "That probably sounds pretty weird to you, but..."
"No. Not at all." He said. "I s'pose my dark side is just as psycho as yours. I never get enough of this stuff. But there comes a time where you feel like you've seen it all, you know? I'm always looking for something new. And not...well...lame."
Our ear buds were still connected, one ear apiece. And now that we were facing each other to talk...I had suddenly become aware of the fact that our lips were only about eight inches apart. That's kissing distance! It made me blush instantly. Ugh...turning red is SO involuntary! Stupid, bashful, biological functions! I hate them!
"Yeah...well, you can find lots of good stuff...there..." I said, gazing into his eyes. "They have this...ummm...this interactive member review section too, where everyone can give their personal reviews too. If they like it, then you can be pretty sure that you will too." My breath was getting short. My temperature rising. His effect on me was taking over my ability to think straight. Come on, Jamison...get yourself together. "I'll have to make you a list or something."
"That would be sick. Give me everything! I'll watch them all, back to back, I swear." He said.
"This is so crazy. My mom thinks they're all scary and gross. She can't just look at it like it's a movie, so she freaks out. And my dad has the attention span of a humming bird, so when it comes to any kind of actual plot...he's either distracted with something else, or he's asleep in the first fifteen minutes. Now that Johnny is in college...I don't really have anybody to enjoy them with me anymore." I said.
Turning that enchanting smile back in my direction, Diego said, "Well, I've never had anybody to enjoy them with. My mom, my Aunt Selma, and two little sisters...they can't stomach it. So, there's just me...which isn't as much fun. They're such girls when it comes to this stuff. Hehehe! It's refreshing to meet a fellow 'splatter fan' for once."
Diego's eyes went back to the laptop screen...but I just kept staring at his lovely profile in awe. "Uh huh..." I said softly, unable to take my eyes off of him.
I was conflicted in a lot of ways. I mean, on one hand...I was filled with a surge of warmth and affection for Diego that I can't say that I've ever felt before for another boy. I didn't quite understand it. The sensation was wordless. And it truly made me thank the stars above to know that I had the ability to notice him for the beautiful soul that he was, inside and out. However, on the other hand...the whole experience felt somewhat...anti-climactic.
You know how you just have this huge fantasy of being swept off of your feet in the back of your mind all of your life? Some miraculous story about how your first big love is going to go? You think about the drama and the fireworks and the head-over-heels gut punch of it all...finally bringing you to the peak of the mountain where you're finally able to experience the greatest emotion that human beings are capable of. And yet...one of the most enticing, most dynamic, and most thrilling boy that I've ever met...ended up just meeting in a random bus station. It was terrifying to think about how fragile this moment that we're sharing right now on my first road trip out of town really was. I mean...what if traffic made me late? What if he had been late? What if we hadn't scheduled to take the same bus? What if I hadn't taken that particular seat next to the outlet in Terminal 16? What if we had two different destinations entirely? One microscopic turn of events could have kept me from this shared moment with a boy that has suddenly become my whole reason for living in a short amount of time. Something about us being together...it gives you a hint of proof to concepts like 'fate', and 'destiny', or maybe just random 'luck'. Who knows? But I was thankful for it, either way.
This was boyish temptation at its finest.
As the bus traveled further and further outside of the city limits, I began to see what Diego meant by it being a boring ride, visually. It's hard to remember, sometimes, that Chicago is surrounded by a lot of...other stuff that's not Chicago. Hehehe, to put it lightly. I doubt that I was going to need to take any pictures of anything until I reached Champaign. That's when Diego saw me looking out of the window, and giggled, "See? I told ya so. Nothing to see here, bro."
"You weren't kidding. Geez." I smiled back at him. "Still, it's kinda cool not seeing tall buildings and taxi cabs everywhere all the time. I don't know...I think it's kind of refreshing to have a change of scenery from time to time."
"Oh God, are you going to turn out to be one of those nature boys that likes to go for long hikes in the wilderness and ends up getting mauled by a bear or a mountain lion or something?" He teased.
"HELL no! Hahaha!" I told him. "I'm still a city boy at heart. Always will be. I can get all the 'nature' I need on the front lawn of the nearest suburban household. But I don't mind seeing how the other half lives from time to time."
"Well put. I like that." Diego grinned. And our eyes met for a moment. Not like...a glance or a friendly little acknowledgment of one another. This felt a bit different. Maybe it's all in my head. It's not like I can really trust my emotions fully att his point anyway, so I forced myself to turn away and stare out of the bus window at...'nothing'. Hehehe! I swear, from this day forward, every time I even hear somebody talking about the threat of human overpopulation...my mind is going to immediately go back to thinking about all of this unfathomably vast amount of empty space out here and I'm going to laugh myself silly. "So what else you got, Jamison?" Diego asked me. "It looks like you've got about half of your battery power left in your laptop. You think we can check out another movie?"
"Sure. Ummm...what are you in the mood for? I've got monsters, ghosts, vampires, werewolves..."
"Ooh! Werewolves! Definitely. I've got a fetish for the wild side." He grinned.
"Werewolves it is." I said, and Diego looked over my shoulder as I went through my files to find us another cool horror flick to dive into. However, as I began scrolling down my list...I found myself getting nervous. I had forgotten that I downloaded a bunch of gay themed movies and short films too on that same list. Nothing pornographic or anything, but I never really took the time to rename the files to just have the film title on my list. They always have to have, in gigantic capital letters, 'BIG OLD GAY FILMS FOR BOYS WHO ARE GAY!!! GAY!!! LIKE...GAY!!!' Dammit!
At first, I just tried to scroll past them really fast, hoping that the screen was moving too fast for Diego to really see them. Then I tried to awkwardly turn my screen away from him, like, "Wait...hold on a sec. I'm getting...ummm...there's a glare from the window. Let me just, hold on..." But it's not like I could turn it that far enough away from him since he was sitting in the bus seat next to me. I hope he couldn't see me turning red in the face. Please don't tell me that I screwed this whole trip up before we were even halfway there. My only hope was to quickly find this werewolf movie and get back to distracting him so he didn't spend any amount of time and energy on wondering why I would have so many gay movies on my laptop. Just...it's best if he didn't think about it. I'll totally understand if he changes his whole demeanor once I find it, but I'll just pretend not to notice until he decides to get up and go sit somewhere else on the bus. I just...I want to enjoy his company for a little while longer, you know? The very fantasy of him is so cool. I didn't want to let go of it just yet.
"Here it is. Ok. Found it." I said, feeling an uneasy flutter in the center of my stomach as I turned the screen back around to share the screen with him again. "This one is pretty cool, I think. Some good gore too. And...well, you'll see." I noticed that Diego was looking into my eyes with half a smirk on his face, but he wasn't saying anything. "You haven't seen this one yet, have you?"
He shook his head slowly. "Nope."
His voice was so soft when he said it. I hope he didn't see my playlist. I SERIOUSLY have to hide that stuff n another folder or something. Ugh! How embarrassing!
"Ok, well...here we go, then..." I said, nervously handing him my other earbud so we could share again. However, he seemed to move even closer than he was before. This time, he didn't mind at all if our cheeks touched. He was close enough for me to feel his body heat warming my face from the side. I could inhale the aroma of his boyish breath. with the laptop balanced on one of my legs and one of his...I tried to concentrate on the movie images on the screen...but all I could think of was him. And a few times, he would reach up between us to run his fingers through his dark brown hair again. He makes me so crazy when he does that.
I found myself becoming hypersensitive to everything in those moments. Every time he smiled. Every word he spoke during the movie. Every gasp through some of the jump scares. Every giggle that came from some of the gory parts. And the physical contact of his elbow touching mine on the armrest between us. That was magic for me. Hehehe, at one point, we even had a bit of a giggly fight over who was taking up too much room on the armrest...pushing each other until we were both laughing hysterically over trying to occupy the same amount of limited space. I swear...everything about Diego was perfect. And, speaking as a die hard romantic...that goes way beyond him just being so physically attractive. It's like...we were compatible on multiple levels. If I ever had to choose someone to be my soulmate for life...Diego would win first place, hands down. My heart felt as though it was flapping its wings so violently inside of my chest that I felt like a total bastard for keeping it caged up the way that I was. I could feel it. And it left me so breathless that I almost found myself wanting to get a break from Diego's immaculate presence for a few minutes so I could find some time to compose myself in a manner that wouldn't get me kicked off the bus.
And then...the kicker...
See, Diego kept looking at me. Even while the movie was playing, I noticed that he would turn his head slightly to look at me...and whenever I looked back at him, he would totally wreck me with that beautiful smile of his. But where he tried to hold on to that intense level of eye contact, I couldn't bear to hold it for longer than a few seconds. Opting to turn my head back out of the window to look at the flat and boring farmland scrolling by my window in order to avoid the fear and frustration of having to expose myself to his piercing gaze again. Something about those soft brown eyes could level me with a single glance. Tear me apart and force me to confess the ultimate sin of being so enchanted by him that holding it back caused me more pain than it gave me a sense of security.
Dear God...I've been waiting my whole life to wait for someone like him.
"You sparkle. You know that?" He said, out of nowhere.
"Huh? I what?"
"Your eyes. Like...they're this really cool shade of blue, and when the sun comes through the window and you smile...they, like...well, they sparkle."
Ok...so I wasn't prepared for him to say something like that. "They...they do? Sorry." I said, sort of acting on autopilot.
"Sorry? Why are you sorry?" He asked. "I think it's...you know...kinda cool. That's all."
Do I say something? Do I just take the compliment and keep my mouth shut? Does he know? Is he just making an observation? What do I do? He already made the comment! That only gives me SECONDS to answer without looking weird! FUCK!!!
"Oh. Ok. Well...thanks." I smirked, and felt my face blushing super hard all over again.
He just sat there and watched me for a few seconds, a smile on his face as he watched me try hard not to squirm in my seat. Then he snickered to himself a bit, using his knee to gently butt mine to keep me from being so bashful from his amazing compliment on my eyes. He was too pretty for me to describe, you know? There was just something about him that enraged my soul to the point of catching flames...and I never wanted to put them out. Life would be so dull without the fire he inspired within me.
"So....in this movie...there's like, this pack of werewolves that get this boy to sorta, like...'join' them, or whatever. It gets pretty twisted along the way..." I said, hoping to escape the shame and weirdness of my feelings for this boy.
But Diego said, "We don't have to watch this one...if you feel like watching something else."
"Oh. Well...I mean, I've got a zombie apocalypse movie if you want to..."
"That would be cool. But maybe we could watch one of your other movies. I mean, I'd be cool with that too. You know...if you want?"
Losing my breath, I asked, "You mean...like, the vampire one, or...?"
"Sure. Or...maybe one of the other flicks you've got on there?" He SAW them, didn't he? Shit! I really REALLY didn't want him too! I felt so humiliated. I kept hoping that he wasn't, like...trying to be nice, or 'tolerant', or whatever. He didn't have to do that. I never prepared for the meeting of the boy of my dreams on a random road trip to see my brother in college. How was I to know that my playlist was so obviously gay and brazen as to tip off anybody close enough to look at my screen. Even a brief glimpse from a distance would probably scream, 'this boy LOVES to suck dick'! I just knew that I'd screw this up somehow. I just KNEW it!
I instantly started to try to make excuses for what he saw. Or might have seen...being vague enough to not say much, just in case he didn't really see anything at all. "We don't have to, Diego. Sometimes I just watch stuff because...I mean, sometimes folks recommend a few ideas and I check them out just because I..."
"Yeah. Me too." He interrupted. "But I might have seen some of those movies already. So...maybe you can find something I haven't seen yet. You know...in that category..." He gave me a look as though he were signaling me to possibly take the hint. Wait...was I missing something here? Ok, should I...like...should I just...? "It's up to you, Jamison. Just saying. It might be fun."
There was nothing sexual or even flirtatious happening at that moment. So why did I feel myself getting hard all of a sudden?
Still, to be TOTALLY sure, I asked Diego, "Well...what movie did you, ummm...have in mind?"
He leaned closer to me, and he looked me directly in the eye. "Do you mind if I look at your list?"
I won't lie...I was a bit guarded about my list of gay themed movies, but there was something about his beauty that was so honest, so open...that I felt like I wanted to trust him. I really did. "Are you sure?" I asked.
"Uh huh..." He said softly. So, with a few shivers, I reluctantly turned off the werewolf movie and turned the screen his way to let him look at my playlist.
I was cringing the entire time that I watched him scrolling through my movies. God, I never felt so GAY! I almost couldn't even face him as he looked through the titles. I was just hoping that he'd find something soon so I could catch my breath and stop feeling like some kind of pervert. Does Diego know how hot he is? Is he going to think that I'm just talking to him because I want to strip him down naked and have my way naked with him? I just couldn't get comfortable. I was wiggling to the point where I nearly slid down to the floor...ad looking out the bus window didn't help me at ALL, as the most exciting thing I saw was a sign for McDonald's and a BP gas station coming up within the next 1/4 mile or so.
Please don't hate me. Please don't hate me. PLEASE don't hate me!
"This one looks cool. Have you seen it before? I have. But it's one of my favorites." Diego said.
I looked at his selected file, and it was a gay short film about two teens who come out to one another at a friend's swimming pool party. That's one of his favorites??? I was like, "Really?"
"Yeah. I've seen it plenty of times. It's really sweet." He said. "Or...at least, I think it is. That's ok, right?" He asked to double check my feelings on the whole idea, but as I felt the goosebumps being raised on my arms again, a severe tingle spreading out over my chest, running up my spine, and curling up behind both of my ears...I smiled widely and I answered him.
"It's...totally ok...heh..." I chuckled. Finding the courage to add, "It's one of my favorites too."
And that's when Diego breathed a sigh of relief, and so did I. I think a certain understanding had been reached between us. It was this unspoken agreement that we were more alike than either one of us wanted to admit on a public bus during an extended road trip...but it was there. And when I switched over to start one of the many gay short films that I had saved on my laptop, I felt Diego take a hold of my hand...and we smiled at one another to confirm the mutual sentiment between us.
I NEVER thought that something like this was possible! Not for me. Another boy...a really cute, really cool, boy...who was also gay...could be here holding my hand like this. This was a miracle! It really was! And when we finished that one short film, he wanted to watch another one. And another. Some we had both seen before, but there were still a couple that were new to him. How is any of this happening to me right now? As the bus was coming up to its first stop for everybody to get off and grab some food, snacks, use the bathroom, or just stretch their legs...I began to realize that there simply wasn't enough road for Diego and I to travel through together for me to ever want this beautiful gay fairy tale to end. I just...wanted this road trip to last forever, you know? I'd get married to Diego on this bus, if he'd have me.
We pulled into some janky little spot behind a strip mall for our first stop. And I was expecting Diego to get up and give me some room to get off the bus and move past him, but he grabbed my arm and smiled at me, holding me still. "Wait, hold on for a second..." He said. And I sat back down, waiting for everybody to clear off of the bus. Hell, even the driver stepped out, leaving us both alone in the middle.
"So what's going on...?" I said, but barely got the words out of my mouth before Diego grabbed a hold of my laptop and pulled it onto his lap, leaning over to kiss me lovingly on the cheek. It shocked me so much that I don't think I even reacted to it. I just...I froze. Then I smiled. But then I froze again. And, with an even deeper blush than ever, I looked back out the window at this old shack of a gas station and 'middle of nowhere' bus stop as I tried to keep my obvious teen erection from being sooooo obscene and presumptuous from that simple kiss alone. He was a lot braver than I could ever be, that's for sure.
I just kind of sat there for a moment. And...feeling a bit out of sorts at the moment...all I could do was giggle. Like...MADLY! And Diego began giggling too, now that we were pretty much by ourselves. Everybody else was anxious to get off the bus and stretch or whatever...but Diego and I were happy just staying in our seats, away from everybody else's view. "You're sparkling again. Hehehe!" He said.
"Am I? Sorry." I think it was just a habit for me to apologize for stuff like that. it was automatic, I didn't really mean it.
But he looked into my eyes, and he softly whispered, "Don't be sorry. K?"
We shared a moment of true connection, and I could only get enough breath to answer with, "K..."
And i knew we didn't have much time left alone on that bus, and so did he. My laptop was still playing a movie that neither one of us cared about at that time...and even though we waited a full minute or two before making a move on one another...he finally leaned forward to give me the sweetest peck on the lips that I've ever felt before in my life. not that I've ever had another boy kiss me on the lips before, but...well...you know what I mean. It turned me into a puddle of warm gelatin, just feeling his tender lips against mine. And while I giggled bashfully at first, I looked over my shoulder briefly before returning the favor.
This led to a little kiss from him, towards another little kiss from me, and after a short period of the bus being basically empty...we began to really make out with one another. I wasn't even sure that I'd know how to use my tongue in such a situation until I found the right boy to do it with. Because...omigod! Any other time, I would have thought that another boy's spit would be the grossest thing in the world, but now that our lips were locked together in this sensual vacuum? I couldn't imagine anything hotter than having his sexy tongue lick and taste and slide itself against my own.
I'm kissing a BOY!!! I'm really doing this right now!!! Gaaaahhhhhhhh!
Eventually, we had to stop as people began loading themselves back on the bus. But, even though we stopped making out...Diego never once let go of my hand. We held hands for the rest of the whole trip, as a matter of fact. He was just...so sweet. And even during our boring road trip towards Champaign, Illinois...he found these tiny little moments where he could just lean over and kiss me on the lips. Like...every single that he felt like nobody was looking, he'd lean in and kiss me again. And as much as I spent time looking for boys that I found really cute and sexy...this was the first time that *I* felt like the sexy one. Hehehe, he just couldn't stop kissing me! It made me giggle out loud to think that he was even more infatuated with me than I was with him.
We rode out the rest of that long road trip together, and every stop that we made...we stayed on the bus, and we tongue kissed like crazy for as long as we could before any witnesses to our deplorable sin made their way back on the bus and threatened to ruin our privacy to keep going until we were satisfied. I mean, hard as a rock, I think that just kissing Diego's soft lips was more than enough to activate every endorphin in my body and agitate every random teen hormone in body to the point of wanting to explode.
As HARD as I was in my pants, I don't think I would have known what to do if he touched me...'down there'. You know? God, I sound like such a virgin, but the truth is...if we were both alone and naked, I think I'd be a bit scared about what I was supposed to do. Or have done to me. I mean...I wanted it! God, I wanted it so badly! But...maybe I wasn't ready for it yet? I don't know. Does that sound weird?
Maybe I should wait a while for all of that...'extra' stuff. BUT...if I was going to share my first time with anybody, I would want it to be Diego. Who else could ever be a match for me? You know?
Yeah...we had to ride out the full three hour plus trip together, and my laptop eventually ran out of battery power. But luckily for us, the people sitting on the other side of the bus from us were dead tired...which just gave us more time to kiss. Hehehe! His tongue was so soft and wet. It was like candy to me. And, now that I think about it, I'm sure that everybody else who wasn't asleep could hear our lips smacking, as well as a few of our occasional soft moan from the overwhelming joy that we were both feeling from being able to kiss another boy for the first time. I mean, yeah...we had to figure out the physics of it at first, but it really didn't take long. Once we got a rhythm going, I don't think it mattered whether somebody else was watching or not.
I never knew that kissing another boy would be like this. It was so...comfortable. So sexy. And every time the bus made another stop on the road, we found ourselves anxious to get everybody around us off the damn vehicle so we could lean in and hug each other and start kissing again. For the first time, I got to run my hands through the soft and silky strands of his dark brown hair, and feel the vibration of his soft moans against my lips. At one point, my laptop dropped to the floor off of our legs, and Diego was about to apologize, but I was like, "I totally don't care!" And I pulled him to keep kissing for a while longer.
And that was the rest of our road trip to Champaign Urbana. I mean...kissing him was probably most of our time spent. And when our trip came to an end...I was seriously hurt that we didn't have a few more hours to make out with one another. Like...I could spend days just feeling those lush, pink, lips crushed against mine. If only life could be perfect like that.
Even when the bus made its final stop, Diego and I kept trying to wait everybody out so we could kiss some more. But we eventually had to get off of the bus, and even though we were both fully hard at the time, we made sure to cover our excitement up with our bags as we headed to the front to get off the bus together. And that's when Diego turned to me and asked, "Hey, Jamison? Maybe I can, like...call you some time or something?"
"Yeah. I'd like that." I said. "Maybe I can call you too?"
"Definitely." He smiled, brushing his hair out of his eyes again. "Give me your number and stuff." We exchanged information, and I found out that we were both only about an hour's drive away from one another. "So...see you soon?"
"If you want to. Yeah." I smiled, blushing furiously.
"I do. I want to." He said, and he gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before rushing off to meet his brother to spend the weekend with him.
I was a bit too infatuated to see Johnny walking up behind me, tapping me on the shoulder. He laughed, "What's going on here? Did you hook up with somebody on the bus?"
"Hehehe! NO! What are you talking about?"
"You're gonna act like that cutie didn't just kiss you on the cheek? Like, I didn't see that?"
"Quit spying on me!" I grinned. "What's up, big bro?" I gave him a hug, but he kept hounding me about the boy he just saw me flirting with. Not only at that moment, but for the rest of the weekend. Wow...I missed having someone to talk to about this stuff. Johnny was the best brother in the world, you know that?
The weekend was crazy! And I'm definitely looking forward to college life if it's going to be as crazy for me as it was for my brother...but even more than that...I'm looking forward to being with Diego again. To kiss some more. Maybe even...do some more stuff. Like, naked stuff. Hehehe!
It's been almost two weeks since I've been home now. I'm not really sure if I'm waiting on him to call me, or if he's waiting on me to call him first. Or if...maybe we're both just waiting on each other to make the first move. But...the more I think about the taste and texture of his tongue in my mouth on that bus...barreling down the pavement during a road trip with no other entertainment other than the sensuous connection between his soft boyish lips and mine...
The more anxious I get for the opportunity to do it all over again.
Call me, Diego. Please? We have the potential to be something special if you do. Something crazy! I'm down if you are.
Don't ever doubt an instant connection with someone you meet, folks. Even at random.
Some things really aren't too good to be true!
- 15
- 17
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
2021 - Spring - On The Road Entry
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