NOTE 2: I just fixed the lack of italics. Text messages should be formatted now.

NOTE: I just found out they don’t even have basements in Texas. Go figure! So, my research skills absolutely suck (in this case, they were basically non-existent!) but I’ve gone too far to change it now. So, in this alternative universe where my characters live, there are basements in Texas

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It was Sunday night and Shaun and Gretchen were lounging on the back patio, watching Ben grill burgers. Shaun had a beer in his hand and his phone resting in his lap. He and Jesse had started trading texts multiple times throughout the day, and Shaun was pretty anal about responding in a timely manner.

Just then, almost as though he’d heard Shaun thinking about him, Shaun’s phone chimed with another message from the little redhead. Shaun set his beer aside and whipped his phone up, checking it at once, scowling a little when Jesse’s image loaded, and he saw what he was eating for dinner.

“Is it another horny fan?” Gretchen asked, taking a bored hit off her cigarette.

“No, it’s Jesse,” Shaun grumbled. “I haven’t had any more weird messages since you helped me set my account to private.”

“Tit pics aren’t weird. They’re a sign we’re moving up in the world,” Gretchen smirked. “I’m still getting stuff on the band page. No nudes, though, thankfully. People are just like really excited for our comeback. Its fucking wild.”

Shaun grunted in agreement. The morning after Gretchen’s post, the one announcing their return to the stage, Shaun had awoken to messages from 6 different people. More had come throughout the day, and he’d finally turned his phone on silent because he’d been working, and the continual chiming sound was starting to piss him off. Here and there, when Shaun had managed to get a break, he’d checked his notifications. A couple of people asked how he was, after his brutal accident, but most of the messages were just excited fans talking about the show, like Gretchen had mentioned. Around lunchtime, he’d even gotten a shoutout from Miguel on his One Thousand Nights page, wishing him good luck.

But after the fourth tit pic came through, Shaun was really starting to get annoyed. These death metal bitches were thirsty. Too bad their big fleshy balloons had no effect on Shaun’s dick. At all. Out of frustration, he’d blocked the bitch and deleted her pictures, just like the last three, then he’d turned his phone off, promising he’d take care of it later.

Only, he hadn’t even thought about it until long after work and practice with the band. He’d only turned his phone on Friday night because he’d been morbidly curious if he’d gotten anymore adoring messages. And he had. Quite a few, too. He’d been scrolling through a particularly strange one when Jesse had called. A guy twice his age had rambled on for five whole paragraphs about how he felt Shaun’s music was going to be big and how he loved it even now, in its raw, unproduced form. Shaun had been lying in bed, half drunk from a drinking session with the band after practice, and he’d been both offended to be called ‘unproduced’ and creeped out by how obsessive the rando fan was being. And then an unknown number had interrupted the reading material. Shaun, for good reason, had been incredibly suspicious, but he’d still answered. And thank god he had.

The next day, Shaun had saved Jesse’s number to contacts with a star by his name. Then he’d asked Gretchen to block the fans on his account. The random Facebook messages had been a novel experience, but he was already sick of it. He only wanted to deal with fans at shows and other band related events.

“So how’s Jesse?” Gretchen asked as she blew smoke out her nose like a dragon. “It’s really good to hear he’s finally getting some help over there. Your grandparents are saints.”

Shaun pulled an ugly face in response, then grabbed his beer again and knocked it back, taking a long guzzle. It pissed him off that Ruth had started watching Jesse’s little ‘responsibilities’. He knew the situation pleased all parties involved, but he was still imagining the kids coming across shameful childhood photos of him, finding some of the old and really bad song lyrics he’d used to jot down on notepaper or worse yet hearing his most embarrassing life stories repeated oh so lovingly by his fucking grandparents.

He was uncomfortable with the idea of the kids getting to know him and his past. But at the same time, he thought maybe it was just inevitable and that he should just let it go. He was in love with Jesse and he was never ever going to leave him again. The kids were bound to get to know him at some point whether he liked it or not.

“What’s wrong?” Gretchen asked suddenly, and Shaun looked at her in confusion, setting his beer aside again with just a sip or two left. “What’s with the grumpy look on your face? I thought you were happy to be back with him.”

“I am. Fuck,” Shaun muttered. “I just…” He took a deep breath, then pulled his phone closer and enlarged Jesse’s picture. He turned his phone around so Gretchen could see. “Here. See for yourself.”

Gretchen leaned in and studied the picture with a furrowed brow. “I don’t get it. He’s having a really delicious Sunday dinner?”

“Oooh, let me see,” Ben said as he finally returned to the table, holding a plate of burger patties. Shaun turned the phone to him, too, and Ben took a look. “Wow,” he said. “Kinda puts my food to shame. Did Jesse make that?”

“Fuck no,” Shaun grunted, pulling his phone back so he could take another look. Jesse had snapped a shot of his meal and the impressive spread on the table in front of him. BBQ spare ribs, corn on the cob, and homemade butter biscuits were piled in big serving bowls. To Jesse’s immediate left and right, there were two different plates with child sized portions, so he knew he wasn’t alone. “That’s my grandma’s kitchen,” Shaun pointed out. “Those are her plates and bowls. He’s eating at my grandparents’ house.”

“Lucky dog,” Ben said, setting their food on the patio table. “That looks ridiculously good.”

“It is,” Shaun said moodily, remembering similar meals Ruth had served up in the past.

“Oh, so your jealous,” Gretchen said slyly.

“No,” Shaun snapped, but then he thought about it for a second. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

“It’s okay to be homesick, you know,” Gretchen said gently. Her cigarette was almost finished and she flicked it casually into the grass. “When I first moved away from my parents’ place, I must have gone back twice a week just to have some of my mom’s food. I’ve always been a shit cook. It’s why I appreciate Ben so much.”

Ben blushed a little. “Aww, thanks babe.”

Gretchen stretched up for a kiss, then she snagged a burger with pincer fingers and grabbed a bun and some condiments to add to it. “Food looks good, Benny boy. You won’t hear me complaining.”

Shaun sighed. “I’m not complaining either. I just feel like I should be there with him.”

“Well, you technically could, if you wanted to,” Gretchen said as she assembled her burger. “I’m kinda surprised you didn’t ask to borrow one of our cars, actually. I’d be more than happy to loan you mine for a couple hours, or even for the night if you decided to stay over.”

Shaun gave her a look. “Oh really?”

Gretchen rolled her eyes. “Yes, really. I wouldn’t let you drive around last week because you were taking strong pain meds and also, you were talking about murdering Jesse’s little friend.”

“Yeah. Whatever.” Scowling, Shaun leaned over the table and got a burger with his fingers, too. “I thought about asking for a ride or something, but I decided not to.”

“Why? Don’t you want to fuck Jesse’s brains out?” Gretchen drawled. “I heard you whacking it in the shower this morning. You can’t tell me you aren’t thinking about it.”

Shaun’s cheeks turned a vibrant, brick red. “You have no fucking clue how motivated I am to get my own place right now. You’re always fucking spying on me and nosing into my business…I’m so damned sick of living with you.”

“Same here,” Gretchen said, then she took a bite of her burger and talked around her mouthful. “In fact, I was going to start charging you rent to live here but I changed my mind. Keep your money. And you’d better start saving up, too. Me and Ben want to set up our fuck pad and your ruining it.”

“Aww. Am I hogging up your crappy attic?” Shaun sneered, slapping his burger together with attitude.

“I’ve always wanted to put a sex swing up there,” Gretchen said dreamily. “I think it’d be really romantic.”

Shaun rolled his eyes. His burger was done though, and it made him think of Jesse, eating his ribs and buttered sweet corn. He needed to send him a reply, but he had nothing to say. He was oddly upset, and finally, he snapped a quick picture of his burger, then sent it along. Though he was sure they tasted fine, Ben’s burgers looked kind of shriveled and sad. He must have struggled a bit with Gretchen’s grill. Anyway, Jesse would love the hilarious comparison.

“So, why aren’t you hurrying over to Jesse’s place right now?” Gretchen asked as Ben finally finished messing around with the grill and sat beside her. She watched as he made a plate for himself, smiling about nothing in particular. “Ben and I wouldn’t mind having the house to ourselves. You’re free to take my car for the night.”

“No thanks,” Shaun huffed and dug unhappily into his burger. He knew he could go see Jesse. There had never been a doubt in his mind about that. He was just…nervous and he wanted to do things in the proper way. Seeing Jesse before the show somehow felt like cheating. No, he had to get through a long, honest week of work first, tackle the show Friday night, then, and only then, would he let himself enjoy Jesse and all his pleasures.

“I don’t get it,” Gretchen said, her smile falling away.

“You don’t have to ‘get it’,” Shaun said grumpily in reply. “Just go about your business and leave me alone. I know what I’m doing.”

Gretchen dropped her burger and crossed her arms. “Did you hear that ungrateful shit, Ben? He acts like ‘his business’ hasn’t been our sole focus for weeks now. Fucking excuse me for being invested in the outcome…”

Shaun frowned and took an aggressive bite of his food. He didn’t fucking care what Gretchen thought. He’d already turned Jesse down, multiple times, he wasn’t changing his mind.

“I think I understand where he’s coming from,” Ben spoke up, as always, trying to mediate. Gretchen looked at him sharply and he fumbled to defend his position. “Shaun’s afraid to jinx it. Right, man?” he glanced at Shaun, who continued to eat. Ben struggled on regardless. “Things are going his way, but he doesn’t want to rush it. I figure he’s waiting until after the show to see Jesse.”

Shaun’s eyes widened a little. “That’s basically it. Like exactly.”

“See,” Ben said. “It makes perfect sense to me.”

Gretchen sneered. She poked her burger, then tore off a piece and popped it in her mouth. She didn’t say anything. She just chewed, loudly.

“Besides, if I’d wanted to go over there, I should have done it yesterday. I’ve got to be back here tomorrow at 5 in the morning for work,” Shaun grumbled, elaborating just so he didn’t have to listen to Gretchen’s obnoxious lip-smacking. “I’d most likely stay up late, wouldn’t get any sleep, then I’d be in a rush to get to work in the morning and I’d be in a shitty mood. Just…no. It’s not worth it. I need this job. I’ve already got too much riding on it.”

Gretchen stopped chewing and quirked an eyebrow. “That’s probably the most mature thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“I just want to get through this week without any distractions,” Shaun said with a nod of determination. “We’ve got practice tomorrow night and Wednesday night, then we’re all meeting here Friday and carpooling to the show.”

“You forgot something,” Gretchen said. “How’s Jesse supposed to get to the show? He’s bringing his brother and his kid along, too, right? How’s that supposed to work? Where’s everyone sleeping and who’s paying for the food and beer? We haven’t discussed any of this yet.”

Shaun shrugged uncomfortably. “I don’t know. I figured we’d just play it by ear.”

“No, we need to plan,” Gretchen said firmly. “That’s how these things are done.”

Shaun sighed. Jesse would be ecstatic to know the plans for the weekend though. He’d mentioned it more than once last night when’d they’d talked on the phone and Shaun had a feeling he’d mention it again tonight. “What are we going to do, then?”

“Well, since you’re so paranoid about seeing Jesse before the show, we’ll send Ben to pick him and his crew up after work. He won’t be able to get there until 6:30, which is perfect because it’ll take him like an hour to get to Beaumont from Hallettsville giving him an arrival time of 7:30, which is?”

“Roll call,” Ben finished for her. “Cool, so I can leave Jesse and his fam in the audience and meet you guys backstage.”

“Right,” Gretchen said, then to Shaun, “Now, Jesse might be upset you and Harry aren’t swinging by after you finish with the basement stuff to get him. You guys are done at 3. But just tell him we’re going over Harry’s bass part one last time. Brushing up on a couple parts or something. He’ll understand.”

Slowly, Shaun nodded. That all sounded agreeable.

“And for the weekend sleep arrangements, I figure you and Jesse can camp out in your room, Shaun,” Gretchen said. “I’ve got a little blow-up mattress for the teenager and the kiddo can sleep on the couch. They’ll be just down the stairs from you, but you’ll still have some privacy.”

“Alright,” Shaun grumbled. That didn’t sound too horrible and invasive. More than anything, he just wanted to avoid Sam walking in on him buck naked.

“We’ll be eating most of our meals together as a group, so me and Ben will handle everything up front with our cards,” Gretchen continued. “But food’s expensive. When the weekend’s over and you have some money from your first paycheck, we’ll need you to cough up some cash for your friends.”

Shaun was a little less agreeable about this part, but it did make sense. As long as Gretchen didn’t request some exorbitant figure, he figured it'd be fine. “Okay,” he said finally.

“And for two days straight, I’ll just smile and pretend I love little kids,” Gretchen finished cheerfully, practicing her fake smile with great effect. “This is going to be so much fun.”

“I love little kids,” Ben said with a shrug. He’d been eating quietly, but he chose to speak up for the little ones. “They always have something funny to say. I hope I can have one or maybe two of my own soon.”

Gretchen shoved the last of her burger away, turned off by Ben’s little comment. “If you think I’m going through 32 hours of labor like my mom did for me, then you’d better look for a different girl ‘cuz I’m not doing it.”

“I bet I could change your mind.” Ben waggled his eyebrows. “Any baby of mine is bound to be awesome and totally worth some temporary labor pains.”

Gretchen struggled not to laugh. “I don’t care how funny your offspring might end up being. You’re not dragging me through 9 months of hell. Fuck no.”

“We’ll see. Once you witness my legendary fertility dance, passed down from my father, who learned it from his father, who learned it from his, and etcetera, etcetera, you won’t be able to resist.”

Gretchen rolled her eyes and let out some devastating reply, but Shaun wasn’t listening. Quickly, he finished his burger, then pushed away from the table. He was done. With the meal, with his warm beer, with the conversation… He turned from his bandmates flirty banter and headed back inside.

A few hours later, Shaun was sitting up in his room. It was dark out, and the house was mercifully silent. Ben and Gretchen, whatever they were doing, were being quiet about it.

It was getting late and Shaun had to go to bed soon, but he was waiting for Jesse to call first because he’d promised he would. So, Shaun was propped up in bed, entertaining himself with thoughts of his upcoming performance Friday night.

He was imagining the breathless feeling of stepping onto the stage. The lights overhead were almost blinding, and they illuminated hundreds of watching faces in the audience below. It was intimidating, standing in front of so many people, but for once in his life Shaun didn’t want to hide. The sound of the crowd’s cheers, the rush of their frantic energy, it was incredibly addicting and Shaun absolutely loved it.

He couldn’t fucking wait for Friday. He felt like he hadn’t performed in ages, even though it had only been 4 weeks. He was itching with anticipation. It was taking every ounce of his self-restraint to contain his almost childlike excitement.

Shaun had his eyes closed and he was half asleep, daydreaming about being on stage, when his phone started to vibrate. He jerked upright and grabbed it off the nightstand. He took a second to clear his throat, then he answered.

“Hello?”

“Shaun…” Jesse breathed. He sounded relieved. “Sorry I kept you waiting so long. It took forever to get the kids in bed tonight. They were all riled up from being at your grandparents.”

“Really?” Shaun grunted. He hadn’t heard from Jesse after they’d exchanged pictures of their dinners. He was morbidly curious. “What all happened?”

“Basically a party. After dinner, Eli brought out the corn hole board and we all played until dark. It was so much fun. Then, while we were playing, Ruth made double fudge brownies with ice cream for dessert. The kids were covered in chocolate when we got home,” Jesse laughed.

Shaun frowned a bit. The warm, fuzzy feelings he’d been having thinking about the show were fading. While he was glad Jesse was laughing and having a good time, he just felt stupid, like everyone in class had been invited to the big party but him. As usual, he’d been excluded from the fun, but it was his own doing this time. There was nobody to blame but himself.

“What did you guys get up to over there? I bet you were partying, too,” Jesse said, and Shaun instantly felt like he was being pitied. “God, I miss hanging out with you guys. I bet everybody got smashed and you guys played around on your instruments. I bet it was awesome.”

Shaun’s frown deepened. “Both Ben and I work in the morning, so nobody’s ‘smashed’. And it’s kinda dumb to hold practice when one of your band members is missing. Harry will be here tomorrow. We’ll ‘play around’ then.”

“Okay, okay,” Jesse said defensively. “I didn’t mean to offend you.”

“You didn’t,” Shaun lied. “I’m just telling you how it is.”

“Well, I saw that burger you had for dinner,” Jesse said cautiously. “I didn’t know Gretchen had a grill. It looked pretty good.”

“It wasn’t,” Shaun said moodily. “Ben had the heat turned up too high or something. The meat was dry as hell.”

“Oh.”

“I watched TV for a couple hours, made myself a sandwich, then I came up to my room and I’ve been sitting up here ever since, waiting for you to call,” Shaun said grumpily. “I’d hardly call that a party.”

“Why are you in such a shitty mood?” Jesse asked suddenly and Shaun huffed. He’d known Jesse would say something eventually, but he’d wanted to sulk a little longer. “Did you have another fight with Gretchen?”

“No,” Shaun grumbled.

“What then? Are you…dreading work in the morning?”

Shaun shook his head. “No. Not really.” While he’d been doing basically the same thing since he’d started, already, in a weeks’ time, he’d been all over Texas on different service calls, learning something new at each step. He was actually looking forward to another week of work, in a weird way. Plus, his first paycheck was on the way.

“Okay? Then why are you so upset? Wait…” Jesse paused for a minute and Shaun knew he’d been caught red-handed. His face started to fill with heat before Jesse even spoke. “You’re jealous we were at your grandparents’ house, aren’t you? You miss them.”

Shaun snorted. “No, I don’t.”

“Every time I mention them, you get all bent out of shape,” Jesse said. “I think you do miss them.”

Shaun scowled, but he didn’t bother protesting anymore. He was being way too obvious about it, it seemed. He was indeed jealous and everybody could tell.

“I already told you; your grandma had a lot to say about the subject when I mentioned we were back together,” Jesse said, amused. “She asked about you a couple times today, too. I think, as much as she’s trying not to, she misses you, too.”

Shaun grumbled disagreeably under his breath. He remembered Ruth’s rage the day he’d moved out. That day, when he’d left for Gretchen’s, he’d figured he'd seen the last of the woman.

“Don’t be so dramatic, Shaun,” Jesse said lightly. “When you drop us off Sunday, come in and say hi. I bet she’d be really happy to see you.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Shaun grumbled, then abruptly changed the subject to avoid any further embarrassment. “That reminds me. We’ve got to talk about this weekend.”

“Oh, yeah? Are we ready to make plans?”

“Yes. Me and Gretchen talked about it over dinner,” Shaun said. “Ben’s coming to pick you, Sam, and Brian up Friday around 6:30 and you’ll head straight to the show from there.”

“Aww, I was so hoping you and Harry would pick us up after work,” Jesse whined. “Either that or I was thinking maybe you’d show up in your new car?”

“Yeah, I’d love to, but I don’t have time for all that Friday,” Shaun said. “Erin has to meet me at the DMV so we can switch the car’s title into my name. I’ll text him and see if he’s available Saturday morning or something. We can do it then.”

“Okay.” Jesse still seemed disappointed and Shaun braced himself for the next question. “But why can’t you and Harry swing by after work? We can hang out with you guys before the show. It’d be fun.”

“Because Gretchen and I want to go over Harry’s parts again before we play. Just one last rehearsal,” Shaun said, giving Jesse Gretchen’s excuse. “We’ll be too busy to hang out.”

“But you just said it was dumb to have practice with a missing member. What about Ben?”

“Forget what I said,” Shaun growled. “Gretchen and I know what we’re doing. We’re going to rehearse just like I said.”

“Alright, fine,” Jesse said. “We’ll wait for Ben, then.”

“Good.”

There was a moment of tense, awkward silence. Finally, Jesse took a deep breath.

“Something else happened,” he said softly. “Right before I called you, actually.”

Shaun frowned again. He had a feeling he wasn’t going to like this. “What happened?”

“Kyle called me when I was giving the kids baths. It was weird. We haven’t spoken since his stupid party on Friday. He didn’t even bother to check in on us after we just up and disappeared,” Jesse said, disgusted. “Sam’s been laying around on the couch, hung over and sick all weekend, so he didn’t get a chance to tell him the news.”

“What? That we’re back together?” Shaun sneered.

“Yeah,” Jesse said. “So, I got to tell him myself.”

“And? What’d he say?”

“He said he was happy for us and that we belonged together and stuff,” Jesse said uneasily. “But I could tell he was upset. Everything he said had this edge of sarcasm to it.”

“That fucking snake. He knew we’d get back together eventually, he just wanted to do as much damage as he could in the meantime,” Shaun said darkly. He couldn’t get over his suspicions that Kyle had done something or had been planning to do something to Jesse, but since the redhead refused to confirm them, he just tried not to think about it too much. “I wish you’d listened to me. I wish you’d stayed the hell away from that pervert.”

“I know,” Jesse whispered. “I was just so…desperate. And he was so understanding and willing to help.”

Shaun shook his head. He wanted to scream but there was no point. Jesse had fucked up. Again. He was always fucking up. Shaun decided he needed to keep him close so he could watch over him. That was the only way to keep him safe and free from harm. It was a big job, but Shaun was willing to do it.

“I’m sorry, Shaun,” Jesse said and it kinda sounded like he was crying. “I don’t know why I’m so stupid sometimes.”

“I don’t either, but I love you, either way,” Shaun said in a deep voice. “Just relax. Okay?”

“Okay,” Jesse sobbed. “I love you too, Shaun. More than anything.”

Shaun smiled faintly. “We’re going to spend the whole weekend together and it's going to be great. I promise.”

“I can’t believe your grandma is going to watch the twins and the baby Friday and Saturday nights,” Jesse said with a little laugh, trying to shake off his sadness. “She’s amazing Shaun. She’s helping you even now, you know that, right? She loves you so much.”

“Your mom’s going to be furious when she figures out what’s going on,” Shaun reminded him. “You’d better enjoy this while it lasts.”

“We’ll see,” Jesse said grimly. “I’m not willing to go back to the way things were. I’ll fight for this.”

“Just hold on a little longer,” Shaun said. “It won’t be long before I can save up for a place. I’ve been looking for apartments near my job. I need to come up with $1000 for a security deposit.”

“That’s a lot,” Jesse said. “Is that a month’s rent?”

“Yeah, but it’s a good price for a two bedroom. I checked around. I figured I’d save up for the deposit plus a couple months of rent so we have some time to settle in and you can find something part time to help.”

“You’ve been making so many ambitious plans,” Jesse said fondly. “I’m so proud of you. You’re figuring shit out. You’re really being an adult about all this.”

Shaun rolled his eyes. “There’s no other way to be about it. A child can’t lease an apartment.”

“No, I guess not,” Jesse laughed.

Shaun sighed deeply. He loved hearing Jesse laugh. It was so cathartic. It made him think of all the good times they’d spent together, sharing laughs and smiles. Sure, he was jealous Jesse had spent the evening being coddled by his grandma, but even more so, he was jealous of all the gorgeous smiles and joy filled laughter of Jesse’s that he’d missed. He hated himself even more for delaying their reunion.

“You sound tired,” Jesse said.

Shaun shrugged. “A little. But I have to go to bed either way. My alarm clock goes off at 5am.”

“Ooof, that’s brutal.”

“Yeah. But I like being off at 3,” Shaun said. “It works out alright.”

“That makes sense,” Jesse said slowly. “I should let you go. You need your sleep.”

“Mmm. So do you. Those little brats will be up at the crack of dawn ready for more.”

“Ugh, I know. Don’t remind me,” Jesse groaned, and Shaun smirked. “I’m just… debating whether I should tell you this last part or not.”

Shaun’s smirk fell away. “What last part? What are you talking about now?”

“That call I had with Kyle,” Jesse said, then he sighed. “I guess I’ll just tell you. Kyle had this plan to drag me to your show Friday and surprise you. He said you’d get jealous seeing us together and that hopefully, you’d try to save me and somehow that’d lead to this big, romantic scenario where we would get back together.”

“Is that fucking right?” Shaun growled. “If I saw that fucker at my show, I’d probably rip him limb from limb then shower in his blood. Is that romantic enough for you?”

Jesse gasped. “Shaun. No…”

“Why not? The fans would love it. It would be real and visceral. I could make a song out of it and put it on my first album, ‘Killing Kyle’.”

“Well, I’ve got good news for you then,” Jesse said. “When I told Kyle I wasn’t going through with the plan, that I didn’t need his help at all anymore, he got upset. He said he was going to the show anyway, and that he'd just have to find someone else to bring with him. I think it's going to be Ethan.”

“Great,” Shaun said. “I can murder them both at the same time, then.”

“Stop.” Jesse huffed in frustration. “Just be on the lookout, okay? Kyle might be hanging around the show Friday night. Don’t let him sneak up on you.”

“Ohhh, I hope he does,” Shaun said with an evil laugh. “I won’t be responsible for what happens then. Nobody will blame me if I attack.”

“Shaun, please don’t do something crazy,” Jesse pleaded.

“There’s nothing crazy about what I want to do to that rapist,” Shaun growled. “I know he touched you. I just can’t prove it.”

“Well, until you can, you’d better err on the side of caution,” Jesse said. “There’s going to be a lot of people at this event. Lots of witnesses.”

Shaun sucked his teeth. He didn’t fucking care.

“Think about it, Shaun, this is Kyle trying to do as much damage as possible before he leaves, just like you said,” Jesse pointed out. “He wants you to react. If you get violent, he wins. I don’t know what I was thinking before. Going along with his plan would have probably led to disaster.”

“Uh, fuck yeah,” Shaun snapped. “The second I see him, he’s dead.”

“Just think about it, okay?” Jesse said. “Think reasonably. You can’t go apeshit in public. It’ll be bad, I promise you.”

Shaun ran a hand over his face. “I’ll definitely think about it. Don’t worry about that.”

“I love you, Shaun,” Jesse said in a little voice. “I can’t wait to see you play.”

“It’s going to be really awkward for you. Watching me on stage is probably going to give you a hard-on and you’ll be standing in the crowd, your brother on one side of you and your kid on the other,” Shaun said, enjoying Jesse’s imagined discomfort way more than he should. “But that’s what you wanted, I guess. You kinda deserve the embarrassment.”

“Gee, thanks,” Jesse snorted. “I’ll remember that Friday when your sexy ass is on stage. I probably will pop a boner,” he laughed.

“Probably.”

“Alright, smart-ass,” Jesse said, and thankfully, it sounded like Shaun had gotten him to smile again there at the end. “We’ll talk more tomorrow. I want to hear all about work and practice with the band.”

“Mmhm. I can’t wait to hear about the kids and all the mischief they got up to.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Jesse chuckled. “Oh, and text me when you get to work. I love waking up and seeing messages from you. It’s so cool you finally got a phone.”

“Will do,” Shaun said. “Text me back as soon as you wake up. I’ll be waiting.”

“Goodnight baby.”

“Night, Jess.”

Shaun hung up, then plugged his phone into its charging cord next to the bed. He set it on the nightstand so he’d be able to reach it in the morning when the alarm went off, then he laid on his side and shut his eyes.

There was a lot on Shaun’s mind tonight, worries and fears for the now, and hopes and dreams for the future, but he focused on breathing deep and even. He forced himself to think of nothing but the air flowing in and out of his lungs and after maybe twenty minutes, he was drifting off to sleep.

In the morning, Shaun woke up a few seconds before his alarm and he turned it off before the shrill sound pierced the silence.

It wasn’t like waking up for school, which Shaun dreaded with everything in his entire being. He was choosing to do this, and nobody was waiting up to make him go either, namely, his grandma.

Shaun took a quick shower, then changed into his work clothes: fitted jeans, his boots, and a neon green t-shirt that had the business’s name, Texas Waterproofing, embossed across the chest. When he was dressed, he stood in front of the mirror and tied his hair into a bun at the back of his neck. He looked like one of the guys when he was finished. A lot of them had beards and tattoos and he blended in pretty well with his rough exterior.

Shaun went to the kitchen next and made himself a cup of coffee and some toast. Ben didn’t have to be up until 6, so he was totally alone, just how he liked it.

He was drinking his cuppa quietly at the table when Gretchen’s dumb cat made an appearance. He and the cat had been getting along better as of late, and he wasn’t surprised when the beast rushed under the table to rub against his leg.

“Morning, little shit,” Shaun said to the cat. It started purring in response and Shaun spared the pathetic thing a scratch behind the ear.

Soon, he got a text from Harry.

Three minutes, it said, and Shaun made sure he had his wallet and his phone, then went out to wait for his ride.

In exactly three minutes, Harry’s massive GMC pulled up in the driveway. Shaun hopped in the passenger seat and buckled up out of habit.

“Morning, Bud,” Harry said. He was dressed similarly to Shaun, but with a red bandana tied around his head. “Ready for another week in the trenches?”

“Yep.”

Smiling, Harry backed out of the driveway and started off down Gretchen’s little street. They had to jump on the highway for twenty minutes, so he was heading back to the main road for the connection. The radio was playing softly, some old country song Shaun hadn’t heard in ages. It was vaguely soothing even though it wasn’t his usual fare.

“I talked to Stokes on way over. He wants me as crew chief again and you and Dallas are with me,” Harry said as they drove and Shaun cringed a little because he hated riding three deep in the truck. There was always a lot of touching involved. But Dallas was alright. He was newer too and they’d worked together last Monday and Tuesday. “We’re doing ground work for a new pump today. So lots of digging.”

Shaun nodded. He’d do whatever they wanted him to. He was finding that hauling concrete and digging holes was easier than reading books and doing worksheets in school. Sure, he’d rather be playing his guitar and working on lyrics, but at least they were paying him to do this. Better than he’d ever been paid before, too.

“I’ll probably have you outside today, digging a footer trench, that’s a hole along the side of the house. We need to repair a crack along the outside wall, then seal up the inside for the pump they’re going to place tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Shaun said. “Just show me where to start digging. I’ll get it done.”

“Cool. Hopefully we can finish up before lunch and move onto the next job,” Harry said. “This should be pretty simple. I’ll get Dallas started on the inside part, working on the concrete and sealant, then I’ll come out and help you repair that crack.”

Shaun nodded again as he looked out the window. They were just getting on the highway and he watched other cars flying past. This early in the morning, everyone out was on their way to work. They all had this single-minded determination to get to their end destinations.

Harry sped up and got in the far left lane, going fast like the other early-morning commuters. He turned up the radio and they fell into a comfortable silence. In twenty minutes, they were getting off the highway. The shop was just a couple minutes away and Shaun got his phone out to send Jesse a text.

Morning, babe. I’m about to pull into work. Harry says I get to dig a hole today, so that’s new. Shaun added a quick selfie of himself, smiling haughtily, and was just sending the message when they drove up outside Texas Waterproofing. He put his phone away, then waited for Harry to find a parking spot in the back. Together, they got out of the van then walked over to the garage which was situated behind the main building.

Shaun helped Harry fuel up their work truck and run a quick inventory on their supply list. By 7, Dallas had joined them. He was just a couple years older than Shaun and apparently, he was from the state capital he was named after, Dallas, TX. He was tall and thin, but with a strong, wiry build. His short dark hair was styled in a faux mohawk, and he had a nasty purple bruise under his hazel eye. He had a story to go with it, too, and as soon as Harry greeted him, he launched into an animated tale about some wrestling match he’d seen over the weekend. He said he'd spent a bunch of money seeing a live event up in the city and he’d been so close to the action, he had battle wounds to prove it. Shaun didn’t really care or anything, but he cautiously asked a few basic questions, just trying to be included in the conversation and amazingly, Dallas reeled him in and started talking about his favorite fights blow for blow.

Shaun listened with mild interest as Dallas enthusiastically recounted the wrestling matches. He didn't really care about the sport, but he made an effort to nod along and make a few comments, trying to be friendly with his coworkers like Jesse had suggested.

“Man, you should've seen it,” Dallas enthused. “When The Annihilator picked up Crusher and just threw him clear across the ring - the whole crowd went wild!”

Shaun nodded. That did sound kind of cool. Because of Dallas’s enthusiasm, he was thinking about maybe checking out a match over the weekend with Brian. They put that shit on TV, didn’t they?

“You should come with me some time if you’ve never been,” Dallas said, clapping Shaun on the shoulder and Shaun froze. Was he actually being invited to something? “You look like a guy who’d enjoy a good fight.”

“Yeah. I probably would,” Shaun said awkwardly.

Dallas removed his hand, but he was still smiling as he turned to load another couple gallons of sealant into the back of the truck. “I’ll give you a heads up when there’s another good show. I’ll get us tickets.”

“Oh.” Shaun blinked a little in surprise. “Alright, then.”

Dallas didn’t notice Shaun’s awkwardness. He went back to his story like it was nothing, like he made plans with coworkers all the time, and he probably did, Shaun realized. He wasn’t special here. He was like everybody else. He was glowing with happiness when his phone buzzed in his back pocket. Harry was busy double checking their paperwork on the company iPad they kept in the glovebox, so they had a few minutes still. Already knowing it was Jesse, he took his phone out to look.

Hey, sexy. Nice picture. I just woke up. Everyone’s still asleep and the house is quiet. As Shaun read Jesse’s message, another appeared below it, an image. The little redhead was lying in bed, a smirk playing at the edges of his lips. He had his t-shirt pulled up a little and his flat belly was visible as well as a light trail of hair leading down into his sleep pants which were slightly tented. He looked utterly debauched and completely adorable, all at the same time.

Shaun licked his lips and turned away from Harry and Dallas to answer. Are you going to play with that? he asked, thinking about Jesse’s tented pj’s. He wished he was there so he could take his erection out personally, but he’d settle for pictures.

Maybe, Jesse said. But I’m probably going to pee then climb back in bed for a couple hours. It’s so rare I get to sleep in.

Shaun frowned. Seriously? That’s not fair.

You’ll just have to wait for this weekend, Jesse said playfully. You wanted me all horny and desperate, didn’t you?”

I guess, Shaun said, but he couldn’t help glancing at Jesse’s sexy selfie either way, wanting more.

Have fun digging that hole - don't work too hard, Jesse said and Shaun knew he was probably laughing right now. Message me when you break for lunch! I love you!

Almost reluctantly, a small smile tugged at Shaun's lips. He quickly typed back: Love you, too, babe. Have a good morning with the kids. Talk to you later.

"Alright boys, let's hit the road," Harry called out as he climbed into the driver's seat. Shaun pocketed his phone and walked around the truck to hop in the middle seat and seconds later, Dallas slid in beside him.

Before they did anything else, Harry drove them across the street first and they went in for drinks and snacks for the road. Harry had been fronting Shaun for a week now, so he was getting in the habit of keeping his selections cheap, knowing he’d have to pay it back eventually. Today, he grabbed a couple bottles of water and a single Snickers bar.

When they got back in the truck, Shaun realized Dallas had bought a pack of cigarettes. He was staring at them longingly when the other man cracked the pack open and casually offered him one.

“Thanks,” Shaun said gratefully, sticking the cancer stick between his lips.

“No problem.” Dallas lit him up, then did the same for himself. Harry coughed a little as smoke filled the cabin, but he simply wound his window down and started the truck. They pulled out of the lot just moments later.

It was almost an hours drive to the first service call. As they pulled up to the house, Harry went over the plan again. "Alright, let's get to work. Dallas, you start on the inside - prep the walls and floor for the sealant. Shaun, grab a shovel and start digging that footer along the side of the house. It’s already marked and sectioned off, so you shouldn’t have any troubles. I'll be out to help with the crack repair once I get Dallas set up."

Shaun nodded and waited for Dallas to get out so he could grab his tools from the back. Once he had them, he made his way to the side of the house and as he did, he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Glancing around to make sure Harry wasn't watching, Shaun pulled it out to check the message. It was from Jesse again.

Hey, I was just thinking about it. You should text Erin, the nurse, about that car. Tell him you want to pick it up on Saturday. He might be busy, you know? Who knows what his work schedule is like.

That was a pretty good idea. Shaun texted a reply, Yeah, okay. I’ll do it later.

Good, Jesse said with a goofy smiley face, then he added, I’m still laying here, playing with my dick. I’m thinking about how hot you’ll be on stage Friday night and its got me so incredibly turned on right now…

Shaun felt a little thrill run through him at Jesse's words. He quickly typed back: You'll see soon enough. Now stop distracting me. I've got work to do.

Smiling to himself, Shaun pocketed his phone and grabbed the shovel. He started digging the footer trench along the side of the house, losing himself in the repetitive physical labor. The work was hard but satisfying in a way - he could visibly see his progress as the trench got deeper and longer.

After about an hour, Harry came out to check on him. "Looking good, kid. You're making great headway on that trench. Another couple feet and you’ll expose the crack,” he said, crouching down to examine Shaun’s work. “I’ll be back in another hour. We’re making quick work of the inside job, too. Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

As Harry went back inside, Shaun grabbed the shovel again and went back to work. He found the mind-numbing task very relaxing. For once, his mind wasn’t full of loud, angry thoughts. He was able to achieve the same kind of peace he felt when he played his instrument.

Another hour passed and with hard work and effort, Shaun was able to expose the crack in it’s entirety. Soon, Harry appeared again.

“Let's take a look at that crack now,” he said, jumping down into the trench next to Shaun and Shaun set his shovel aside, wiping sweat from his brow. He and Harry crouched down to examine the long crack running along the foundation wall. "See how it's wider at the bottom?" Harry pointed out. "That means it's still settling. We'll need to inject some epoxy to stabilize it before we can seal it up."

Shaun nodded, listening attentively as Harry explained the repair process. They spent another hour working on the crack. Harry showed Shaun how to mix and inject the epoxy, then had him finish sealing it up while he went to check on Dallas's progress inside.

On his own, Shaun worked neatly for another half hour, smoothing out the sealant with care. He was enjoying the process and Harry’s patient instruction. He wanted to do a good job. He actually cared about the results.

When Harry came back out, he nodded approvingly at Shaun's work. "Nice job, Shaun. You've got a good eye for detail."

Shaun was taking a break in the grass, drinking one of his waters from earlier. He felt a small surge of pride at the praise. He wasn't used to getting compliments, especially not for his work ethic. Before this, music had been the only thing he excelled at and that had always kinda felt like pure luck. “Thanks,” he said.

“Alright. That’s it for the trench. Leave everything the way it is and the inspector will come by tomorrow morning before they put that pump in to double check our work,” Harry said. “Dallas is about done with the inside. Just load up the equipment and we’ll break for lunch. I’ll be in the truck filling out paperwork and pulling up the next work order.”

Shaun nodded and Harry left him to it. Once he was alone again, he climbed back down in the trench and collected his supplies. As he carried everything back to the truck, he thought about Jesse’s message from earlier, about Erin and the car. He put everything back in its place, then pulled his phone out and leaned back against the bumper.

Thinking mostly about the car and the hassle of having to go to the DMV, Shaun pulled up Facebook messenger then tapped into his messages with Erin. As he scrolled to the bottom of their conversation, he noticed Erin had changed his profile pic. He wasn’t wearing scrubs anymore. He wore a little pink tank top and was blowing a kiss at the camera, his dark hair falling romantically into his eyes.

Shaun instantly felt weird, like he was on a dating site or something. But he had no other way to contact the nurse, so he typed up a quick message.

It’s Shaun. I’m going to have that money for the car on Friday. Do you think I could pick it up on Saturday? Jesse’ll be with me and he’s really excited. Shaun added the last part after a moment of consideration. He didn’t want Erin to get the wrong idea; he wanted him to know right off the bat that he was taken.

Shaun was about to put his phone away. He knew the nurse worked nights, so he was probably in bed, but before he could slip the phone into his pocket, it chimed with a reply.

Hey, baby, I was waiting for you to message me.

Shaun blinked a few times at the casual use of Erin’s endearment. He was getting the weird, dating site vibes again and was wondering what he should say when another message appeared below the first.

How’s your new job? You’re obviously making money. That’s good.

It’s okay, Shaun said. They’ve got me hauling buckets of concrete and digging trenches. It’s been cool learning the trade.

Mmm, are you working up a sweat? Send me a picture. I’ve been looking at the stuff on your profile. It’s…been inspiring.

Feeling weird about it, Shaun took a quick selfie. He didn’t even bother to smile. He checked it briefly then sent it along. Smudged with dirt and with a few loose strands of hair sticking to his forehead, he definitely looked like he’d been working up a sweat for the past three hours. There, happy?

Almost instantly, Erin replied. Shit, Shaun. You’re looking fine. You can dig a trench for my basement any day of the week, and Shaun felt his cheeks heat with a blush.

Did you read what I said earlier? I’m back with Jesse. He’s coming with me to pick up the car, he texted back, starting to get annoyed. What the fuck? Why was Erin being such a slut? They’d agreed not to do this flirty shit anymore!

I know, Erin said, and Shaun rolled his eyes. Great. At least he was fucking admitting it. I’m sorry, Shaun. I just really missed you after you left, is all. I’ve been thinking about the other night obsessively.

Too bad, Shaun said sharply. Jesse’s my bitch. He gets the dick, not you. He’s coming to my show Friday night and I’m going to fuck his perfect little ass when it’s over, too.

Yeah. I saw the announcement on your band page. I was thinking about going, too. With a friend, Erin replied, and Shaun wanted to shout, he was so frustrated. Erin just refused to be discouraged. I’m off Friday nights, remember.

Well, don’t, Shaun said firmly. I’ll be too busy to talk to you. Plus, my boyfriend’ll be there. Don’t make me regret fucking you, Erin. It was nice, I guess, but it was a one-time thing.

But what if you could fuck both of us at the same time, Erin suggested.

No. That would never work.

I promise you, it could, Erin said coyly. I’m extremely discrete. Jesse would never have to know.

No, fuck no, Shaun said back, and he was getting angry now. Why the hell does everyone want me so fucking badly? What the fuck’s wrong with you?!

Nothing, Erin said simply. You’re hot and your cock is addictive. I had to say something. I promised myself I’d at least try. I’m not joking, I must have thought about that incredibly sexy expression you made when you came inside me the other night a hundred times.

Stop thinking about it, Shaun commanded. Now. It’s off limits. You don’t deserve that memory.

A stolen memory, Erin said, and Shaun grit his teeth together. Sorry, but it’s mine now. If that’s all I get, then I’ll cherish it fondly.

Whatever. Can you meet me Saturday or not? Shaun growled as he typed. I guess Jesse isn’t coming with me after all. Since your being so fucking weird about everything.

No, bring him. I’d love to see him again, Erin texted. And if you don’t, I don’t know if I’ll be able to restrain myself.

Oh, what? Are you going to offer me at blow job at the DMV?

I might, if you come alone, Erin said, and Shaun’s jaw ticked with rage. Meet me at the DMV closest to my house Saturday at 11. We’ll switch the title over, then we’ll go back to my place to pick up the car.

Fine, Shaun said. Try not to be a slut when you see me. I don’t know if I’m bringing Jesse or not, but you’re not getting my cock either way. Got that?

Whatever you say.

Totally pissed off, Shaun started to put his phone away, then remembered he’d promised to text Jesse when it was lunchtime. Just wanting to get it over with, he switched back to his regular messenger and angrily typed out a message.

We just finished our first job and I’m about to go to lunch, Shaun filled him in, scowling, then he mentioned the part that was currently ticking him off. I just talked to Erin about the car, too. It’s on for Saturday. He’ll meet us at 11.

Still scowling, Shaun was putting his phone away when Dallas appeared with armloads of supplies. He looked like he was struggling a bit under the weight.

“If you help me pack up, I’ll give you another cigarette,” Dallas said, breathing heavily as he dumped everything into the grass.

Shaun shook off his frustration and started to load everything into the truck. A cigarette sounded great right about now. He tried to focus on that and not the spurned ex-lover in his messages.

Once the truck was packed, Shaun and Dallas spent a few minutes smoking, standing behind the vehicle so they were hidden from the house. They bullshitted about the job they’d just completed then theorized what they’d have to tackle next. Shaun was flicking his butt into the grass when Harry called for them to get in. It was time to go, and Dallas shut up the truck while Shaun hopped into the middle seat again.

They drove to the closest fast-food joint, which happened to be Burger King, and went inside to use the bathroom and order. Harry offered to buy them lunch and he and Dallas picked shit off the value menu to be nice. Shaun was already content with his burger, fries, and medium coke, but it got even better when they got back to the truck to eat and Harry pulled out a blunt.

Shaun was very happily stoned when Jesse texted him back. The blunt was gone. The three of them had finished it in under 10 minutes. The truck was still filled with residual smoke though and they were breathing it in while they finished their food. Harry was in the middle of telling them some fucked up story about a girl he’d slept with recently and Shaun was so busy laughing, he didn’t hear his notification.

“Yeah, it was bizarre,” Harry was saying. “So, after three rounds of this really weird, vigorous sex, I fall asleep, right? I was exhausted. I don’t think I’ve ever fucked a bitch harder than this one. I mean, she was screaming for it. Harder, Harry, harder!”

“That’s sick,” Dallas laughed. “I bet she had daddy issues or something.”

“Worse than that, man,” Harry said, shaking his head. “I woke up in the middle of the night to this creepy moaning sound and I felt all around the bed but the girl was gone. I was alone. I sat up, right? Wondering what that horrible sound was and where the girl had gone, and then I saw her standing in the corner on one leg, her back to the room. She had her other leg curled up to her belly and was all hunched over in this weird pose, all…stiff and rigid. The groaning sound was coming from her.”

“Oh fuck! That’s some creepy exorcist shit!” Dallas said excitedly.

“Right,” Harry said, snorting. “I tried to get her to come back to bed but she wouldn’t move, no matter what I said. I tried to touch her at one point and her head snapped around. Her eyes were totally lifeless, and she started speaking in tongues, and that was it for me. I threw my clothes on fast as fuck and bounced. That was probably the weirdest shit I’ve seen in a while.”

“That’s wild!” Dallas chuckled. “And I thought I’d been with some crazy chicks.”

“Where’d you meet her, one of your shows?” Shaun added, amused. “Those groupie chicks are nasty.”

“Unfortunately,” Harry said with a sigh. “And I know this, too. I don’t know why I keep taking them to bed.”

“Those sluts try to send me tit pics and I straight up block them. Stops them right in their tracks,” Shaun muttered, narrowing his eyes as he thought about the desperate girls flooding his messages the other day. It reminded him of Nicky and all the drama she’d stirred up the last time they’d interacted. “I decided I’m not talking to them anymore at the parties either. Groupies are nothing but trouble.”

“Probably for the best,” Harry said. “If I was smart, I’d follow your example, but I’m way too horny to be in a committed relationship like you are. I fuck anything that moves.”

Shaun shrugged. “Not me. I have high standards.”

“Oooh, was that your girlfriend you were texting earlier?” Dallas asked, snickering, and immediately, Shaun felt his stomach do a backflip. “I think I just heard her text you back. You’d better check. Don’t keep a bitch waiting, I always say.”

Shaun and Harry met eyes as Dallas laughed at his own dumb joke. Shaun knew what the other man was asking with his gaze, whether or not he wanted to come out and be honest about everything, but Shaun wasn’t comfortable, and he shook his head with the slightest of movements. He really didn’t want to lie and start another secret, but he just didn’t know Dallas well enough. Things were going so well, with the job and everything included, he was terrified to mess it up.

“Shit, man, did you say you were in a band, too?” Dallas asked curiously. “I know Harry mentioned he played. You too?”

Shaun relaxed a little. The other man had made his assumptions and was moving on. No need for him to engage. He latched onto the new topic eagerly. “Harry’s in my band, actually. He’s our newest member.”

“Oh fuck! Okay,” Dallas said. “What are you called? I’ll look you up.”

Shaun told him and waited for Dallas to google them on his phone. For the hundredth time, he silently thanked Gretchen for setting everything up online. Every time someone asked him about the band, he felt like a bad-ass, knowing they could instantly see him tearing up the stage in crystal clear HD images.

“Sweet, I like death metal,” Dallas said with a nod, scanning through his phone with a look of appreciation. “How often do you play?”

Shaun shrugged. “As much as we can. We’ve got a show this Friday night.”

“Oh, duh, it’s on your event calendar,” Dallas said with a chuckle. “Hell, I’d love to come support you guys, but I’m busy this Friday.”

“It’s fine,” Shaun said, and it was. Enough people were already coming.

But Dallas held his phone out and made a big show out of pressing the ‘follow’ button. “There! Now I’m subscribed! I’ll get a notification the second you guys schedule your next show and I’ll be there, front row. You can count on me!”

“Cool,” Shaun said sheepishly. While he wasn’t comfortable with rumors about him being gay floating around, if the other guys happened to hear about him being in a kick-ass metal band, he didn’t think he’d mind.

They didn’t stay for much longer. They gathered up their trash and Dallas ran inside to throw it away and to use the bathroom a second time. They headed out once he was back in the truck. Shaun didn’t know where they were going but Harry jumped on the interstate, and they drove in a northern direction for a half hour. Shaun zoned out for a while and enjoyed the warm afterglow of the weed and the fast-food. He totally forgot about Jesse’s message.

It was half past noon when they arrived at the second job site. There was another crew already there with a large dump truck. Two guys were standing around, mixing concrete and Harry and Dallas waved and said ‘hi’ as they got out. Shaun recognized one guy from another job and the other from around the shop, but he didn’t know either well enough to actually wave. He found himself wishing he could, though. He wanted to fit in for once.

The three of them wasted no time and headed down into the basement. Two guys Shaun had met briefly in passing last week, Mexicans who spoke broken English, were already hard at work, digging a drainage ditch along the far wall. Harry broke apart from Shaun and Dallas and walked up to them confidently. He spoke in a rush of fluent Español.

“Do you speak Spanish?” Shaun asked Dallas from the side of his mouth.

“Not a word,” Dallas whispered back. “Oh, wait. Maybe one. Hola means hello.”

“I failed Spanish two years in a row,” Shaun grumbled. “That’s about as much as I know, too.”

Harry smiled as he walked back over to Shaun and Dallas. “Those guys are such hard workers; I swear it’d take four of us and a jackhammer to get as far as they did already,” he said fondly, shaking his head. "Okay. We're going to be laying about 50 feet of drainage pipe along that far wall where Juan and Miguel are digging. Shaun, I need you to start hauling concrete chunks out of the basement as they break it up. There's buckets by the stairs - load them up and take them out to the dump truck. Dallas, you and I are going to prep the trench and lay the pipe sections."

He went into more detail, explaining how they needed to create a slight slope for proper drainage and seal the pipe connections. "Once the pipe is in, we’ll backfill with gravel, then the guys outside mixing concrete will come in behind us and pour a new slab over top. We’ll be done at that point and ready to move on to our last job. Got any questions?"

Shaun and Dallas shook their heads.

"Alright, let's do this," Harry said, clapping them both on the shoulder. Then he grabbed Dallas and took him back upstairs to start getting pipes from the truck. Shaun found a spare shovel and got to work loading concrete chucks into buckets. If he carried them right, he could get four at a time. It’d be heavy, but it’d be twice as fast. His muscles already aching from the morning's labor, Shaun pushed himself to meet some imaginary quota, spurred on by the rhythmic sound of scraping shovels as Miguel and Jose continued digging the trench.

The next two hours flew by. Harry and Dallas started laying pipe along one end of the wall while the Mexicans finished with the trench on the other end. When Jose and Miguel were done digging, they helped Shaun with the concrete chucks and when that was done and it was all cleared out, they helped him carry bags of gravel down for the backfill. Soon, Harry and Dallas were done with the pipe and they all got to work dumping gravel over the new drainage system.

“Excellent work, men,” Harry said as they looked over their work. “I’ll get the other guys down here to finish up. Shaun, Dallas, go wait in the car for me. We’ve got one last job before we head home.”

“Seriously? But it’s almost 2:30,” Dallas whined.

Harry shrugged. “We’ve got to run out the clock and we’ve actually got to be doing documented work while we do it. You know how Stokes is.”

“Fucking boss-man. Nothing but numbers and quotas,” Dallas grumbled.

Harry snorted. “Go wait in the truck, you big baby.”

“C’mon, Shaun. Let’s go smoke a cigarette,” Dallas said, sighing, then he jogged up the steps.

Shaun turned to the Mexicans. “Uh…nice working with you guys,” he said awkwardly, not knowing if they’d understand him or not.

The one named Miguel spoke up, going with full-blown Spanish. “Eres un gran trabajador. Fue un placer conocerte.”

“Uhhhh. Gracias?”

“He says you’re a hard worker and it was nice meeting you,” Harry said with a laugh as the Mexicans turned away and started picking up their equipment. “I agree with him, too,” Harry continued. “The first time I saw you play on stage, I knew you were going to be awesome. I’m proud to call you a friend.”

Shaun glowed with acceptance. “Thanks, man.”

“Sure thing. Glad you’re on the team, dude,” Harry said, giving him a thumbs up. “And our band is fucking killer. We’re gonna rock the Texas metal scene like a hurricane!”

Shaun beamed. He couldn’t help it.

“Go have your cigarette. You deserve it,” Harry said and feeling like he was floating on air, Shaun drifted back upstairs and slipped quietly from the house.

Fifteen minutes later, they pulled up outside their last house of the day. It was ten minutes to three and Dallas was visibly itching to be done. Shaun was still buzzed from the nicotine, so he wasn’t overly bothered.

“Dallas, I’m going to have you show Shaun how to do a quick crack repair with caulk. The customer’s complaining some new ones appeared since we were here last. They aren’t leaking, but the basement’s under warranty so we’re obligated to do something,” Harry said as he glanced at the order notes on the iPad. “While you guys do that, I’ll change out the pump and then talk to the customer. That should make them happy.”

“What do you think? Can we finish in thirty minutes tops?” Dallas asked.

“If we hurry.”

“Wrestling starts at 5. We’re about thirty minutes from the shop, then I’ve got another forty-minute drive home from there. That gives me twenty minutes to get a beer, a snack, then get in front of the TV.”

“Like I said, we’d better hurry,” Harry said, putting the iPad away, then moving to get out of the truck. “Get the caulk then meet me inside. I’m going up to greet the customer.”

Sighing, Dallas got out and Shaun followed him.

“This is so lame. I wish they’d pay us over-time, at least,” Dallas complained as they rounded the truck. “I didn’t get home until 6 last Monday. Luckily, my mom recorded the first hour of wrestling for me. I know it’s stupid, but it’s the only thing I fucking care about on the planet.”

Shaun nodded understandingly. “I’m that way about my music. Most people think it’s stupid, too, but fuck ‘em. Fuck ‘em all.”

Dallas nodded in agreement, then yanked open the back door on the truck. “Let’s just hope we can get out of here soon. Fingers crossed this customer is easily satisfied. Ron, the guy who trained me, said caulk is basically a Band-Aid.”

They both grabbed a caulk gun and Dallas added a couple other items, two wire brushes and some rags, then he slammed the door shut and they started after Harry for the house.

As they walked, going slow because Harry was busy talking to an old lady at the door, Dallas still seemed kind of upset. Suddenly, Shaun got a brilliant idea. “So, who’s fighting on TV tonight? Anybody good?” he asked.

That seemed to do the trick. Dallas stopped in the middle of the lawn and his hazel eyes lit up as he began to gab about his favorite characters, going into their origins and their complicated back stories with other characters. Shaun let him talk and when Harry finally turned and gestured them inside, he valiantly continued to listen as they entered the house and descended into the basement. Dallas didn’t shut up until they were standing in front of their first crack. Finally, he stopped rambling about wrestling and switched back to waterproofing.

"Alright, so caulking is pretty simple," he explained to Shaun as Harry got to work on the pump behind them. "We just need to clean out any loose debris first, then apply the caulk in a smooth line along the crack."

Shaun nodded, watching as Dallas used one of the wire brushes to clean out the crack, so little bits of concrete crumbled away. Then he loaded the caulk gun and demonstrated how to apply it in a steady motion.

"The key is to keep constant pressure as you move along," Dallas said. "You want a nice even bead. Then you can smooth it out with your finger." With practiced movements, he smoothed the caulk out just like he’d described, creating a neat seal. When he was done, he used the rag to wipe the excess off his finger. "See? Pretty simple," he said, then he gave Shaun one of the wire brushes. "Now you try the next one."

“Sure.” Shaun moved further down the wall, to the next small crack. He used the brush first, then lifted his caulk gun and carefully squeezed the trigger. His first attempt was a little uneven; he used a bit too much caulk, but Dallas gave him some pointers and they moved on to the next one and then the next and quickly, his technique improved.

"Not bad for your first time," Dallas said. “I think you’ve got the basics down. Finish up this section here and I’ll jump ahead.”

Shaun nodded and diligently continued to work as Dallas moved on. He wasn’t surprised in the least when the other man started up his wrestling monologue yet again. He was too distracted to listen to most of it, but he got the gist.

In fifteen minutes, all the little cracks had been sealed and Shaun now knew an absolute fuckton about wrestling. Luckily, Harry was finishing up with the pump, as well. He’d been out to the truck a few times, looking for parts, but the machine was up and running again, good as new.

“Let me sweet talk the customer a little bit and show her what we did,” Harry said as they grabbed their shit, preparing to leave. “She’s definitely a Karen. The second I told her who I was with, she fucking asked to talk to my manager.”

“Who is your manager?” Dallas asked with a laugh as they turned for the stairs.

“Stokes, I guess,” Harry grumbled.

The old lady was waiting for them at the top of the stairs. She was little and frail-looking, but she had a fire in her eyes. She wasn’t about to be screwed over. Shaun and Dallas left Harry to deal with her and hurried out the front door.

“There were an awful lot of cracks in that basement,” Shaun commented as they walked back to the truck. “That caulk isn’t going to fix the problem.”

“Nope,” Dallas said. “Did you see that pump? It must be 10 years old, at least. Texas Waterproofing was here a decade ago. They either didn’t notice the imminent structural damage with that foundation, or they just figured the repairs were so far into the future, they wouldn’t ever have to deal with it. That lady must be desperate or something to call us up after all this time. I can tell you one thing, the company is going to find any excuse possible to get out of doing anything major. They’ll probably end up voiding the warranty.”

“If they do that, I bet that lady will sue the company,” Shaun said. “She looks like the type.”

“She might, but she won’t win,” Dallas said, shrugging. “Foundation settlement, major cracks, shifting walls, stuff like that isn’t under the scope of the warranty for reasons exactly like this one. She’s screwed.”

Shaun felt kind of bad for the old lady. Honestly, it sounded like she just needed to hear the truth about her situation. Her home was crumbling below her and no old receipts or faded, yellow warrantees were going to save her.

When they reached the truck, they tossed their gear in the back, then climbed in the front to sit in the cab. Shaun and Dallas waited another ten minutes, at least. While they sat, waiting for Harry to return, Shaun entertained himself, and tried to keep his new friend calm by asking random questions about some of the wrestling characters he remembered Dallas mentioning back in the old lady’s house. Excitedly, Dallas pulled out his phone and showed him YouTube videos featuring muscular men covered in oil, throwing one another around a ring. They used chairs and other furniture to beat each other up, gave dramatic speeches accompanied by loud, kick-ass music, and sported capes, flashy speedos, eyeliner, glitter, and other flamboyant accessories. Dallas even showed him a video of one wrestler coming back from the dead seven different times over the course of several years.

“The Crimson Reaper is probably one of my all time favorites,” Dallas said adoringly, gazing at his phone as a towering, hulk of a man struck a pose in the middle of the ring, thousands of fans eagerly screaming his name as he stared dramatically into the mist. He wore a long tattered red cape and had a crimson-painted skull design on his face. His hair, streaked with jet black and scarlet, spilled wildly across his broad shoulders. Shaun wasn’t into makeup or anything, but he thought the Crimson guy’s getup was pretty cool.

Suddenly, the driver’s side door sprang open. Shaun and Dallas turned to watch as Harry climbed wearily into the cab.

“How’d it go?” Dallas asked.

“Bad,” Harry said, then he paused to start up the truck. “I’m not sitting here doing paperwork. I’ll finish it up when we get back to the shop.” He started messing with the GPS on the dash before they’d even hit the road. In seconds, he had the shop’s address pulled up. It’d be just over thirty minutes before they’d return and the second they were out of the old woman’s long driveway, Harry gunned it and they took off down the road, going just over 70.

“What the fuck happened?” Dallas glanced at Shaun, badly restraining his look of amusement. “Did she read you the riot act?”

“Basically,” Harry said, sighing. “I let her have at it for a few minutes, then I straight up told her our pump isn’t responsible for shit. I googled a couple places in the area that do foundation repairs and wrote their numbers down on a little envelope. Then I got the hell out of there. I feel for her. I do. She kinda reminds me of my Great Aunt, Tee-tee. She was a spunky old woman, too…”

“Don’t worry about it. She’ll figure it out,” Dallas said, waving off Harry’s concerns. “We have other things to worry about. Such as, getting back to the shop before 4.”

Harry snorted. “I’ll see what I can do. I’m already going 20 miles over the limit.”

“The cops don’t watch backroads like these,” Dallas said casually. “You could get away with going a little faster, even. I do it all the time.”

Obligingly, Harry sped up another 5 miles an hour until they were going slightly under 80. “Is that better?”

Dallas leaned back in his seat, smiling faintly. “Thanks, man. I owe you one.”

“I need a beer,” Harry moaned. “Fuck. That was so depressing. That lady and her collapsing house are going to be on my mind for days to come.”

“Maybe she’s got family that can help her,” Shaun said, feeling a bit bad, as well.

“She did mention something about a younger sister…”

“See? She’s got someone to help her. She’ll be fine,” Dallas said, then he turned up the radio a little and flopped back in his seat again. “Enough of this sad shit. Please guys?”

Harry nodded, keeping his eyes focused on the road. “Don’t mind me. I cry like a baby when they have those ASPCA commercials on TV, too. You know, the ones with the sad, neglected puppies and kitties?”

Dallas scoffed. “Those things are emotionally abusive. One of those ads came on the other day when I was watching TV with my mom. She started bawling like a baby. They can’t do that to people. It’s sick.”

“Yep. That awful music they play and all those pathetic, frightened little animal faces they show,” Harry sighed deeply. “It’s just heartbreaking. It makes me want to run down to the shelter so I can adopt 5 or 6 rescue dogs. But then I remember I live in a studio apartment with strict rules on pets.”

Dallas laughed a little. “Aww, I didn’t know you were such a bleeding heart.”

“Me either,” Shaun said.

Harry looked uncomfortable. “Maybe my track record is bad with the ladies, but I’m really a nice guy. Honest. I don’t know why you think it’s so impressive I care about helpless old ladies and abused puppies.”

“And I care too, but not enough to talk about it for five minutes straight,” Dallas said mockingly. “Like we have been.”

“Please, be my guest,” Harry said, taking off his bandana and flinging it onto the dash. “Change the subject.”

“How about more wrestling? That’s always a good topic,” Dallas suggested, and Harry closed his eyes for a second and tiredly rubbed his face. “I was just telling Shaun about The Crimson Reaper. I think I’ll turn him on to wrestling yet.”

Shaun was so surprised, but at the same time, not surprised at all, that Dallas had managed to get back on the wrestling subject, he almost started laughing. Instead, he tapped into a huge reserve of patience he’d only ever used with Jesse, and he listened to Dallas ramble about his favorite subject. He was a little annoying, but Shaun decided he liked the guy, alright. In doses. Luckily, they’d be parting ways in just a short while.

They got back to the shop at five minutes to four. Technically, Dallas was supposed to help them clean up the truck and return it neatly to the garage, but Harry let him off the hook.

“I love when you’re crew chief, Harry,” Dallas laughed as Harry slowed to let him out in the employee lot. “You’re a lifesaver, man. Catch you later!” He started to get out, then he turned back at the last minute and smiled wryly at Shaun. “Oh and hey, wrestling’s on USA network. If you want to watch.”

Shaun made a mental note of it.

“See you around!” he said, then he slammed the door behind him and jogged off to his car.

“That kid drives me crazy every time we work together,” Harry said the moment they were alone. He tapped on the gas and coasted the truck around the garage, looping them back so they could hit up the vehicle wash station. “He’s a good worker, but fuck. He never shuts up. He’s always running his mouth about something.”

Shaun laughed a little, not really because he thought it was funny, but rather, because he was so tickled to be included in a bit of coworker-ly gossip. “He’s alright. I think I like him.”

“Maybe you don’t mind his constant talking as much since you’re so quiet all the time,” Harry said.

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Well, whatever floats your boat,” Harry said amicably. “But I’m glad he didn’t invite me to a live wrestling match.”

“Yeah,” Shaun snorted. “It looks campy as hell, but I’m considering it, actually. I guess Jesse’s kid, Brian, likes wrestling, too. Maybe I can surprise him with tickets.”

“Yeah, but then you’ll have to explain your relationship with his dad. Or just hope the kid never mentions it.”

“Oh, right,” Shaun said. “I didn’t even think about that part.” That would indeed be a tricky matter. Maybe Brian still didn’t know Jesse was his dad, but he certainly knew he and Shaun were a romantic couple. That much, oddly enough, had never been hidden from him.

“I wouldn’t worry about it too much for now,” Harry said as they pulled up next to the wash station, which was basically a high-powered hose for dirt and a couple scrub brushes for tar. “When he invites you, if he ever does, you’ll come up with something then.”

Shaun nodded. That was easy enough. Basically, he just didn’t think about it until it became a problem.

“Cool. Now let’s get this truck sprayed down. I’ve still got some paperwork to do, but bear with me. It won’t take long.”

“I’m fine,” Shaun said. “Practice doesn’t start until after 6. We’ve got hours yet.”

“Yeah, but I’m ready for that beer I mentioned earlier,” Harry said, pushing his door open as he started to get out. “If I know Gretchen, she’s got the fridge stocked up right now.”

“I can confirm,” Shaun said being very serious about the matter. “She mentioned she had to go grocery shopping yesterday at breakfast. Beer was mentioned.”

“She really is a huge boon to have in your band,” Harry said, hopping out with a renewed smile on his face. “You’d better hope she never leaves us stupid, pitiful men.”

“She would never. You, me and Ben, we’re her favorite guys ever,” Shaun said confidently, getting out of the truck, too, in case Harry needed help.

“She is rather fond of us, isn’t she?” Smirking, Harry grabbed up the hose and Shaun hurried to get behind him so he wouldn’t be blasted. “I’ll bet she has a special place for each of us in her little black heart.” Harry turned on the hose then and a powerful spray shot out. He aimed it at the mud and dirt splattered up the back side of the truck and in minutes, the truck was sparkling clean. Luckily, there’d been no tar used today, so no scrubbing was required.

They returned the truck to the garage, then Shaun sat around while Harry finished their paperwork for the day and got it turned in.

Eventually, he thought to check his phone and was surprised to see an old message from Jesse he hadn’t seen.

It wasn’t important. Jesse mentioned he was making lunch for the kids and that they were being brats, like usual. He was looking forward to tomorrow, when Ruth and Eli would watch them for the day.

Shaun typed up a brief reply saying he was done for the day and was about to head home. He thought about it for a moment; besides the weird conversation with Erin, he’d had a good day. He mentioned as much, excluding the messages with Erin, of course, then sent the text.

Soon, Harry was finished with the iPad and he put it back in the truck for tomorrow. They headed out after that, back to the parking lot and the GMC.

They drove home in a companionable silence, both of them decompressing from their busy days. Country music was playing on the radio again and Shaun almost drifted off.

They got back to Gretchen’s shortly after five. Harry went straight to the kitchen for a beer while Shaun got a quick shower and changed into something clean. Harry had brought a change of clothes, too, so after Shaun was done, the older man spent a few minutes washing his face and hands in the sink, then he got into something less dirty, as well. Shaun tossed their stuff in the washing machine then joined Gretchen and Harry in the living room, where the beer was already flowing freely.

Gretchen had a cooking show on, but she wasn’t watching it. She and Harry were talking quietly about some girl they knew, a girlfriend of some guy they’d played music with once upon a time. Tragically, the girl had OD’ed for the fourth time in a row and was sitting in the hospital, waiting for a room in rehab.

Shaun listened for a couple minutes, but he didn’t want to talk about drugs. It reminded him too much of Kyle, and that was one of the many thoughts he was avoiding right now. Finally, he cut into Gretchen’s sob story.

“Where’s the remote? I’m done watching these losers try to cook,” he said, gesturing to the TV, frowning as he took a sip of his beer.

Rolling her eyes, Gretchen tossed him the remote, then continued with her story. Across from her, in the other armchair, Harry looked seriously disinterested in the topic, but he was drinking steadily and trying his best to pay attention.

Shaun wasn’t paying attention anymore, though. He found USA on the channel guide and suddenly, WWE Raw took over the screen.

“Oh, God, you were serious back at the shop,” Harry spoke up with a laugh, interrupting Gretchen for the second time. “You really did hit it off with Dallas today, didn’t you?”

Shaun shrugged but he didn’t change the channel. There was some huge guy in a leather body suit running around the ring. Two smaller guys tried to jump over the ropes, but leather man close lined them both with a single arm and flipped them over on their backs. Everybody cheered and leather man threw his arms up in triumph. He was so busy celebrating, he didn’t notice the two guys teaming up, grabbing a chair, and then sneaking up behind him to whack him over the head. Shaun laughed, amused.

For about an hour, he watched wrestling and drank beer. Gretchen and Harry left him alone and he got absorbed in the show. Eventually, Ben came home with a big box of chicken and jojos and everyone ate in the living room. Shaun continued to watch TV while Ben, Gretchen, and Harry bullshitted about work and coworkers and life in general.

Wrestling was almost over and the other band members kept trying to draw him into their conversation. They were talking about starting practice, and Shaun was about to shut the TV off, when he got another text from Jesse.

Glad you had a good day at work, baby. The kids have been a handful today, but I made pizza pockets for dinner, so that made things easier. Good luck at practice, sweetheart!

Shaun sent Jesse a simple thumbs up in reply. Their conversation could wait for now. They’d talk later on the phone. Thinking he’d mention it to Dallas the next time they worked together, he turned off WWE Raw. All in all, he’d enjoyed his first episode.

Harry grabbed the beer, then the four of them made their way out to the garage. The next couple hours were spent practicing their set list for Friday. They were opening for a local favorite, a band called Toxic Hell, and they got 4 songs while the seasoned pros got 6. Gretchen said they had a larger following on social media though and that they could easily outperform the main act. Shaun was determined for that to happen. He wanted everyone to be talking about him after the show.

Under Shaun and Gretchen’s careful ministrations, the band went over each song one after the other. Shaun, in particular, was extra focused on the details and he had suggestions to make the sound better. Much to the band’s annoyance, he refused to quit until he was satisfied. Everything had to be perfect.

It was getting close to 11 when they finally finished. Harry, grudgingly, decided to crash on the couch. He was drunk and tired, and had little confidence he’d make it home safely. Shaun left him and Gretchen in the living room while the girl pleasantly made up a bed on the couch. From the look on his face, Harry was going to pass out the second he was horizontal, so Shaun wasn’t worried about him.

Upstairs in his room, Shaun checked his phone. There was a single missed text.

I know you’re still practicing, but I just got the kids to lay down and I’m so exhausted. I’m probably gonna hit the hay. Love you, talk soon.

Shaun was a tad disappointed he didn’t get to talk to Jesse, to hear more about his day and to tell him about his successful bonding experience with Dallas. None of it was important, but he just wanted to hear the sound of Jesse’s voice…

Feeling a little guilty about it, Shaun put his phone on the charger then got out his knife. He wasn’t upset, but he felt he needed the pain to keep himself stable. He found a place he thought wouldn’t affect him at work, on his ribcage, then deftly sank the blade into his flesh, making a nice clean cut about five inches in length.

Shaun languished in the pain for a few minutes, leaning into the blade and forcing it deeper when it started to dull so the wound split open with a dramatic gush of red and stung brilliantly. With a gasp, he let his eyes fall shut and rode the sharp waves of agony. It took him far away, into a space between reality and dreams. He imagined Jesse was with him and that the boy was naked and boldly straddling his thighs. He rubbed his fingers along Shaun’s fresh, bleeding wound, collecting his abundant life fluid in his palm, then he moved the hand between them and transferred the blood to Shaun’s thick, straining erection. In the real world, Shaun ripped his jeans open and frantically started to beat his meat as dream Jesse rose up on his knees and speared himself on Shaun’s red-stained cock.

Shaun masturbated fervently to his fantasy, wishing Jesse was with him now. He wanted the real thing, not his callused hand. But he made due best he could. Soon, he was coming copiously and the relief was immense. Shaun lazily cleaned himself with some paper towels he’d stashed under the bed for such purposes, then turned off the light and curled up under the sheets.

As the cut throbbed on his side, Shaun thought about Jesse and planned out everything he was going to do to him this weekend. He was almost smiling when he finally fell asleep and when he dreamed, it was of good things.

Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday were copies of Monday. Shaun, Harry, and Dallas worked together every day and Shaun thought they were a good, efficient team. The band’s last practice Wednesday night had gone surprisingly smoothly, as well, and Shaun had been thoroughly pleased with the sound. They were ready to go and everybody was really pumped to perform. Other than that, he and Jesse had talked every day without fail, both of them eagerly counting down the days until Friday. Shaun had never been so horny in his life, so desperate to fuck hard and to come over and over again, and even though he’d promised himself he wouldn’t, he cut himself anew almost every night, masturbating feverishly as explicit images of Jesse ran through his brain.

Finally, Friday morning arrived and right off the bat, Shaun knew it was going to be a challenging day. First, when he and Harry got to work, they found out Shaun was on another crew. It had happened once last week, and hadn’t been an issue; Shaun had been a spare on a big job and he’d broken up concrete and carried it out to the dump truck, like usual. Initially, he thought nothing of it. Harry slipped him a twenty for snacks and lunch, and he was sure the day would fly by.

But then Shaun approached the work truck where three men were already gathered, loading up equipment. As he got closer, his stomach sank. He recognized them - a group of older guys who had been working at the company for years. They always hung out together at the shop, smoking and telling crude jokes. Shaun had overheard enough to know he didn't like their attitudes.

The crew chief, a burly man with a thick mustache named Bobby, looked Shaun up and down with disdain. "So, they stuck us with the new kid today, huh?" he grunted.

"Great, just what we need - dead weight," muttered one of the other men, a wiry guy with a shaved head.

The third man, who was tall and lanky with greasy hair, snickered. "Hope you're ready to work, pretty boy. We don't carry slackers on this crew.”

Shaun gritted his teeth, already feeling his anger rising at their dismissive attitudes. He knew he'd have to prove himself to these assholes.

"Name's Shaun," he grunted, crossing his arms. "I've been here a couple weeks now. I know what I'm doing."

Bobby snorted. "We'll see about that. Alright boys, load up. We're burning daylight."

They piled into the truck, with Shaun wedged uncomfortably in the middle of the backseat between the two other guys. As they drove to the job site, the men talked and joked crudely, mostly about women, betting on sports, and drinking, completely ignoring Shaun. He could feel their elbows digging into his sides, like they were trying to take up as much space as possible.

When they arrived at the first house, Bobby barked out orders. "Alright new kid, grab a shovel and start digging out that trench.” He pointed to a spot along the foundation wall marked with orange flags. Shaun estimated about 12 feet of pipe would fit along the bottom once he’d finished. This was going to take a while. "And make it snappy. We ain't got all day."

Shaun bristled at being called "new kid" again. The “and make it snappy” comment was chaffing him, as well, but he bit his tongue and hopped out of the truck to get to work. He knew he was more than capable of digging a simple trench. As he got a shovel out of the back, he could hear the other guys snickering behind his back.

"Ten bucks says pretty boy can't even lift that shovel," the greasy haired guy, whose name Shaun had learned was Pete, said loudly.

“Loser buys the winner lunch!” the wiry bald guy, Chuck, sang in reply.

Shaun ground his teeth together. These guys were assholes. He took his shovel and moved closer to the house, trying not to think about them too much as they continued to talk amicably and joke around with each other. He felt he was purposefully being left out, for no reason at all either, but he concentrated on the task at hand rather than stew in anger like he usually would. The sun was already blazing hot despite the early hour and sweat began to bead on his forehead as he dug along the house. The muscles burned in his arms as he worked, and he focused on that for a while.

After about 40 minutes of steady digging, Bobby walked over to inspect Shaun's progress. Almost immediately, he scowled and shook his head. Shaun leaned into his shovel and tensed up.

"What the hell kind of trench is this?” Bobby asked, sneering. “It's all uneven and sloppy. Didn't they teach you anything? This is amateur hour bullshit."

Shaun felt his face flush with anger and embarrassment. He'd been working his ass off in the scorching heat for almost an hour, and this asshole had the nerve to criticize him? "I've been digging trenches all week," he shot back, his voice tight with barely contained rage. "It looks fine to me."

Bobby's eyebrows shot up at Shaun's defiant tone. "Oh, we've got a mouthy one here, boys!" he called out to the others. "Thinks he knows better than me after a couple weeks on the job!”

"Looks like the new kid needs an attitude adjustment, Bobby.” Chuck sauntered over with a smirk. “Want me to show him how we deal with mouthy little punks around here?"

Shaun's eyes narrowed into slits as he glared at Chuck. Every muscle in his body was tense, ready for a fight. He could feel a familiar rage building inside him, threatening to explode. “Try me. I fucking dare you,” he growled, and Chuck immediately started pushing up his sleeves.

“Think I won’t, punk?”

“Only one way to prove me wrong,” Shaun snarled, his eyes flashing. Chuck drew himself up, flexing his muscles.

"Now, now, Chuck," drawled Pete, interrupting Chuck’s retort as he, too, joined the party. "No need to rough up the new kid.” He leered at Shaun in a way that made his skin crawl. He’d been giving Shaun weird looks like that all morning and he was fucking sick of it. “Wouldn't want to mess up that pretty face of his now, would we?"

“Fuck you, faggot,” Shaun hissed, his voice shaking with the force of his anger. His fingers twitched, itching to swing the shovel and crack it across Pete’s smug face. It was taking every ounce of his self-restraint not to do it. “If any of you touches me, I swear to god, I’ll lay you out flat. All three of you.”

Both Chuck and Pete started to snicker, obviously underestimating Shaun’s raw strength, but Bobby wasn’t amused. He held up a hand and the laughing stopped. “My problem is I've got a cocky little shit who can't take direction. When I say it's sloppy, it's fucking sloppy. Now fix it before I report your insubordinate ass. And this time, do it right."

Shaun's jaw clenched as he stared daggers at Bobby. He could feel his pulse pounding in his ears, his vision starting to blur red at the edges. Every fiber of his being wanted to lash out. But a small voice in the back of his head stopped him. Jesse's voice.

“When you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four.”

Shaun closed his eyes for a moment, forcing himself to take a deep, calming breath. He pictured Jesse's face, imagined the redhead's gentle hands on his shoulders, grounding him.

"Deep breaths, baby," he could almost hear Jesse saying. "In through your nose, out through your mouth. Nice and slow."

Slowly, with Jesse’s help, Shaun counted to four. When he opened his eyes, his breathing slowed as he felt himself regaining control. The rage still simmered beneath the surface, but it no longer threatened to boil over. He met Bobby's gaze steadily.

"Fine," he said through his teeth. "I'll re-dig the trench."

Bobby's eyebrows rose slightly, clearly surprised by Shaun's sudden change in demeanor. He'd been spoiling for a fight, and Shaun's compliance had thrown him off balance. "Well alright then," he said gruffly. "Get to it."

As Bobby and the others walked away, Shaun could hear them muttering and chuckling amongst themselves. He ignored them, focusing instead on the task at hand. The sun beat down mercilessly as he dug, sweat dripping into his eyes and soaking through his shirt. This wasn’t the first time he’d used Jesse’s handy trick to calm down and he felt it wouldn’t be the last, either. It fucking worked, though he’d never verbally admit it. Jesse was right though. He couldn’t keep losing his temper all the time. Sometimes, he had to restrain himself…

As Shaun re-dug the trench, he refused to let the other’s taunts or the brutal heat get to him. He channeled his anger into the work, digging with renewed vigor. The rhythmic scrape of the shovel against dirt became almost meditative as he lost himself in the task.

By the time Bobby came back to check on him an hour later, Shaun had re-dug the entire trench. It was perfectly straight and even, the depth consistent throughout.

Bobby circled the hole slowly, examining it from all angles. Shaun stood silently, waiting for his critique. Finally, Bobby grunted and gave a curt nod.

"Alright, it'll do," he said gruffly. "Now grab those pipes and start laying them."

It wasn't exactly high praise, but Shaun felt a small surge of satisfaction. He'd proven he could do the work, and do it well. For the next 45 minutes, he worked on laying pipes, something he’d never done before, until it was time to break for lunch. Suddenly, nobody cared about checking his work. Bobby had them pack up their equipment and said they would be moving on; another crew was coming after them to install the new pump and their job was done.

They drove down the street to the McDonalds next and went in to get lunch and use the bathroom. Shaun had just ordered a Big Mac and a Coke when his phone started vibrating in his back pocket. The rest of the crew was standing just ahead of him, talking quietly amongst themselves, so he turned away a little and lowered his voice when he pulled out his phone to answer.

“What’s up?” he whispered. “I’m at work right now.”

“I know. Do you have a minute to talk?” Jesse asked and there were tears in his voice. He was crying. Shaun could just tell.

“Yeah. But just a minute, Jess,” he said firmly. “What’s going on?”

“CPS just came by for a surprise visit,” Jesse said and Shaun tensed up. “That’s Child Protective Services, if you didn’t know.”

“I know who that is,” Shaun said gruffly. “They were in my life for a couple years. After my parents…”

Jesse hummed in agreement. “Well, some lady from the agency showed up maybe two hours ago. And let me tell you, I was kind of expecting it might happen, but at the same time, it was still a complete surprise when she knocked on the door. Sam stayed the night at Kyle’s again, so he crawled into bed around 9am this morning, totally beat, and Mom was out with the girls from work again last night and was up into the small hours of the morning, packing for her weekend with Ryan. She was passed out, too. So, I was alone with the kids, making this huge, fancy breakfast because I’m already feeling guilty about abandoning the twins and the baby this weekend, and the kids were still in pajamas, there were dishes everywhere, and I was frying my first pancake and the kids were fighting bitterly with each other over who was going to get it, when suddenly, there was a knock at the front door. I thought maybe, just maybe, it was you. Or god forbid, Kyle, but I was wrong, so, so wrong.”

Shaun waited a tense moment before he finally finished Jesse’s sentence. “It was CPS?”

“Yeah. Some little stern-faced black woman in a pants suit,” Jesse scoffed. “She said her name was Imani.”

Shaun scoffed too because already, he felt like Imani was going to be an enormous bitch.

Jesse took a shaky breath before continuing. "So Imani comes in and starts looking around, taking notes on this little clipboard. She's asking all these questions about our daily routines and who takes care of the kids. I explained mom works nights and since me and Sam are on summer break, we watch the kids a lot to save on day care and Imani’s nodding as she walks around the whole downstairs, opening closets and cabinets, checking the fridge, making notes on the laundry piled in the laundry room.”

Shaun rolled his eyes, imagining the nosy woman poking around Jesse's house.

“The whole time I'm just trailing after her, trying to explain things and make excuses. I’m trying to be cool, but I’m sweating bullets because Sam is passed out upstairs, probably reeking of booze, and Mom's dead to the world in her room. Meanwhile the twins are screaming and fighting in the kitchen and the baby's crying because I had to put her in the bouncer.”

Shaun clenched his jaw, feeling his anger rising again. In the background, he heard his order number called out and he glanced over his shoulder to see his coworkers eyeing him curiously. Trying to ignore them, he turned back to his phone and asked gruffly. “What happened then?"

“Imani said she understood, but she kept pressing, asking where mom was and why she wasn’t down here watching the kids. She wanted to talk to Sam, too, and after she evaded my attempts to change the subject multiple times, I finally had to admit they were upstairs, sleeping,” Jesse said and Shaun almost groaned. “She said she had to inspect the upstairs anyway and see where everybody slept, so I had to go and wake them up.”

“Fuck,” Shaun muttered. “Then what?”

“I woke mom up,” Jesse said. “She was pissed at first, but when I explained what was going on, she got dressed real quick and came out to talk to Imani. She immediately started making all these excuses, a lot of the same stupid ones I’d already made, that we’re saving money on daycare, that she’s really busy with work, that I’m mature for my age and I’m really good with the kids… Then, all of a sudden, Imani interrupts her and tells her they've gotten reports of possible abuse and neglect. She said point blank that Mom’s been accused of abandoning us for days at a time in order to see men and mom’s face goes pale and I'm just standing there feeling like I'm going to throw up,” Jesse said and it sounded like he was crying again. “And of course, that's when Sam stumbles out of his room looking like death warmed over. He smelled like straight-up alcohol and could barely stand up straight. Imani's eyes just about popped out of her head."

"Oh fuck.” Shaun felt his blood pressure rising as he listened. He glanced over his shoulder again to see Chuck and Pete snickering and pointing at him. His order number had been called out for a second time, and frustrated, he turned away and stormed into the bathroom, abandoning his meal there at the counter. “This is bad.”

"Yeah. It’s real bad," Jesse sniffled as Shaun settled into the cramped bathroom stall. "She started asking Sam all these questions about his drinking habits, how often he goes out. And poor Sam was so hungover he could barely string a sentence together. I tried to jump in and explain that it was just a one-time thing, but Imani wasn't buying it."

“So what happens now?” Shaun asked. “Are they going to take the kids?”

“No, nothing like that,” Jesse said with a sigh. “But they are going to open a case. Imani says the report has merit and needs to be investigated. She spent over two hours here, Shaun," he said, his voice cracking. "When she finally left, she said they'd be in touch about the next steps. She mentioned the kids, Sam included, would probably need psych evals which CPS offers personally, of course.”

“Of course,” Shaun growled.

“As soon as she left, mom and I started arguing. She was pissed about Sam being drunk and trying to blame me for the reports. She said it was ‘probably one of your weirdo friends’.”

“Oh, fuck her!” Shaun snapped. “This is her fucking fault. Every single bit of it!”

“I know. I told her as much,” Jesse said. “I told her about that pissed off mother that watched the twins last weekend. She was threatening to call CPS when she dropped them off and I guess she actually did it. That shut mom up for a little bit.”

“Really? Fucking incredible,” Shaun said with a snort. He fucking hated Monica.

“Yeah, but then she started whining about her weekend with Ryan,” Jesse huffed. “She asked me what my plans were for the weekend, but at the same time, she was begging me to save her money on daycare and stay home and watch the kids. She said she and the boyfriend have an expensive cabin rented for the weekend and they can’t cancel without paying a huge fee.”

“What’d you do, Jesse?” Shaun hissed. “Please tell me you didn’t give in to her fucking demands like you always do.”

“No. I was upset, Shaun. I finally spilled the beans. I told mom about your grandma,” Jesse said, and Shaun blinked in surprise.

“You did what?”

“I was out of ideas,” Jesse said. “The kids had resorted to eating dry cereal out of the box and Sam was watching me and mom argue with this totally blank look on his face. I wasn’t going to stand there and weave another web of deception. I came clean. I told her I’m overwhelmed. All the time. Sam’s been sneaking out to drink and get high for months now and I’ve been on my own more often than not. Mom was just glaring at me, like I’d done something wrong, so I told her your grandparents have been helping me and it’s the only thing keeping me sane right now. CPS is right, the kids are being neglected. Ruth and Eli are the only good things in their lives right now. They’re consistent, they genuinely care, and they’re offering their services for free. I told mom she’s crazy if she thinks I’m going to cancel the weekend I already have planned for everyone. I already assumed she would be busy and out of the picture, so between myself and your grandparents, the kids will be cared for and entertained until Sunday night. Mom just stared at me for the longest time after that. I seriously thought she was going to tell me to get out of her house. I’ve never just outright lied like this and gone behind her back. It feels like I betrayed her or something.”

“She’ll be fucking fine,” Shaun snapped. “She’s an adult, Jesse.”

“I told my mom she should go out and have a good time this weekend,” Jesse said after a moment. “I told her when she comes back, we’ll work on everything. Together. There’s a lot going on with the kids right now that needs to be addressed, but we’ll talk about it later, when everyone’s in a better mood.”

Shaun let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. “What’d she say to that? That’s extremely reasonable of you. I would have told her your planning to move out.”

“You told me not to do that,” Jesse said. “Remember? And she doesn’t need that stress on top of all this CPS stuff. I’m all she’s got, Shaun.”

“And yet she continually takes you for advantage,” Shaun growled. “She doesn’t deserve you.”

“Well, she didn’t argue with me anymore after that,” Jesse said. “She went down to the kitchen and started screaming at the kids for making a mess.”

Shaun rolled his eyes. “Good for her.”

“It’s…not how I would have handled it, but she did get them to pick up the cereal. Then she got Sam an aspirin and made him take a shower. She was in a shitty mood, but she actually started a load of laundry before she jumped in the shower.”

“Oh, good. That solves everything, then.”

Jesse laughed and Shaun smiled a little, glad his sweet boy was able to find the humor in the situation. “I just need to hold on till 3 o’clock, then I can take the kids—”

The bathroom door flew open, and Shaun dropped his phone between his legs so it clattered loudly on the tile.

“New kid! Hurry it up!” It was Bobby and Shaun froze in the act of retrieving his phone. “We’re pulling out in three minutes. With or without you.” The door swung shut directly after and Shaun burned with humiliation, crouched there in the grungy McDonalds bathroom stall. He should have known the other guys wouldn’t let him have a moment of privacy. They were fucking assholes, after all.

Shaun grabbed his phone up. “I’ve gotta go, babe. I’m on a new crew today and these guys are total dicks.”

“Aww, no Harry and Dallas today?”

“No. Not today,” Shaun grumbled.

“Okay,” Jesse said sadly. “I’m sorry for bothering you. I just had to talk to somebody.”

“It’s okay,” Shaun said. “I’m glad you called me.”

“I love you,” Jesse said, and he just sounded so incredibly vulnerable, Shaun wanted nothing more than to hold him close, to look deep into his eyes as he kissed him tenderly….

“I love you, too, baby,” he said, his voice a low rumble. “I’ll see you tonight. I promise you.”

“I know. But tonight can’t come soon enough,” Jesse moaned. “It feels like it’s weeks away still.”

“I know what you mean,” Shaun said bitterly, thinking about the hours yet he still had to get through. “Just try to be patient.”

“Alright. Bye Shaun.”

Shaun ended the call then jumped up and squeezed out of the stall. He knew he had to get to the truck before his asshole crew mates left him behind, but he was starving and he wanted his Big Mac. Moving quickly, he rushed back to the main restaurant and shoved his way through patrons until he reached the counter. The girl from before, some chick around the same age as himself and Jesse, raised an eyebrow at him.

“Do you still have my food?” he asked. “Sorry. I was in the middle of an important conversation.”

“Your friends took it out to the truck,” the girl said boredly. “The guy with the shaved head was guzzling your drink, though.”

“Fuck!” Shaun shouted, then he turned and pushed through the lunch rush crowd, running for the doors.

When Shaun got outside, the work truck was idling in the same spot as earlier. He didn’t stop, he charged for the truck at full speed and wrenched open the door the moment he was close. In the back seat, Chuck was sucking his drink down while Pete devoured his burger. “You motherfuckers!” Shaun roared. Both of them were snickering and he was enraged. “I fucking paid for that!”

“Shaun! Shut up!” Bobby snapped and Shaun spun around to address the crew chief sitting behind the wheel, then saw the older man had his phone glued to his ear. He was talking to someone.

Shaun was furious but he zipped his lips shut and pressed them together until they turned white. He was silent, but visibly shaking with anger. Still, Chuck and Pete didn’t stop eating. They seemed to delight in his impotent rage. Shaun was thinking about hitting them when suddenly, Bobby met his narrowed eyes in the rearview mirror. He looked kind of pissed off, too. “Stokes is on the phone. He says those pipes you laid? It’s all bad and we’ve gotta go back.”

“Maybe it would have gone better if you’d actually showed me what to do instead of barking orders at me,” Shaun muttered angrily under his breath. “I’m not a fucking dog.”

Bobby took the phone away from his ear and turned around, so he faced Shaun fully. “What’d you say?”

“Nothing,” Shaun spat, but Bobby had heard, and Shaun could feel his face turning red again as the older man glared at him.

"You better watch your mouth, boy," Bobby growled. "I've been doing this job for almost 20 years. You don't know shit."

Shaun glared back at Bobby, his jaw ticking with anger. He was seething with rage but knew he couldn't afford to lose this job. Taking a deep breath, for the second time that day, he forced himself to remain calm.

“You’re right. Sorry. Let’s just go fix those pipes.”

Bobby narrowed his eyes, clearly not believing Shaun's sudden change in attitude. But after a moment, he grunted and turned back around in his seat.

"Get in," he snapped. "We're heading back to the site."

Shaun climbed into the backseat, shooting daggers at Chuck and Pete who were still snickering as they finished off his lunch. Shaun's stomach growled loudly, reminding him that he hadn't eaten since early that morning and even then, it had only been a piece of toast.

As Bobby pulled out of the parking lot, Shaun clenched his fists so hard his short nails dug into his palms, drawing blood. He focused on his breathing, trying to stay calm, but it was a losing battle.

The drive back to the job site was tense and silent. When they arrived, Bobby ordered for Shaun to start digging up the pipes he'd just laid and Shaun, pissed off, but yet resigned, jumped down in the ditch to get started.

For the first twenty minutes, Bobby hung over Shaun as he worked, telling him how pissed Stokes was they were wasting an entire day on a job that should have taken two to three hours and he was smug when he said he’d told him it was Shaun’s handiwork to blame for the delay. Shaun didn’t say anything, but he blamed Bobby’s lack of clear instruction and supervision. This shit was his fault, but the others thought differently and they had no compunctions about telling him how they felt. When Bobby finally quit mocking him and went to check on something in the truck, the others took his place and stood around, making sarcastic remarks and snide comments as they watched him work.

Shaun tuned the assholes out. He couldn’t listen to them for long, he felt he might seriously snap if he did… As he plunged the shovel into the dirt, the heat scorched his exposed skin and his muscles screamed in protest, sweat poured down his face and his heart hammered away in his chest, he was fucking exhausted, more tired than he’d ever been in his life, but he didn’t stop, he didn’t even pause as he unearthed foot after foot of pipe. He refused to give up and let the other guys dominate him. He’d rather dig his own grave than admit he was tired or that he needed help.

The next hour was the same. Bobby barked orders from the sidelines while the others teased and ridiculed him. Shaun ignored all of them and focused on undoing his mistake. There were only a couple hours left, and they couldn’t possibly do anything worse to him than they already had. Shaun hunkered down and with no assistance on his crew mates’ parts, he slowly finished uncovering the pipes.

When Shaun was done, Bobby and the others simply shoved him aside and took over. Unlike when he worked with Harry and Dallas, Bobby and his crew offered Shaun zero encouragement, they had no tips or suggestions, and they refused to teach him anything he didn’t already know. For the rest of the day, Shaun was forced to either take care of the menial, physical labor or stand around, scratching his ass like an idiot because the others didn’t trust him with anything important. It was clear they despised him and wanted him to fail and by the time Bobby called it quits and told everybody to pack up for the day, Shaun was scowling at everyone and everything, he was so upset with the way he was being treated.

Luckily, they weren’t far from the shop and it took only thirty minutes for them to drive back. Shaun knew he wasn’t supposed to, but the second they got back, he jumped out of the work truck and stalked out of the building, heading straight for Harry’s GMC. He wasn’t spending another second with Bobby and his goons.

When he got to Harry’s van, he climbed in the passenger seat and slammed the door shut. For a second, he was totally quiet, and then he screwed his face up and let out a sudden and earsplitting scream. The rage and frustration from the day poured out of him, like water from an open faucet. He whacked a hand against the window and shook the van, playing through Bobby’s and the other guy’s cruel remarks and comments from earlier, remembering all the shitty, fucked up shit they’d said to him and about him behind his back. A couple random guys walked past, pointing at the van as Shaun continued to rage inside it. But he didn’t give a shit. He didn’t stop yelling until his throat was hoarse and he was starting to fear he wouldn’t be able to sing tonight if he kept it up. Finally, he trailed off with a little wail.

Shaun waited for Harry to finish in the garage for another twenty-five or thirty minutes. He wasn’t really paying attention to the time. He thought about calling Jesse, but he didn’t want to upset him. The little redhead had enough on his mind right now.

As Shaun sat in the van, around him, the parking lot slowly started to empty. One by one, sometimes in little groups of two or three, guys emerged from the garage across the road and got into their vehicles. Shaun was jealously watching a little blue sedan drive away when his phone chimed with an unusual sound. It reminded Shaun of a little animated cash register, and curious, he pulled his phone out.

When Shaun checked his notifications, his mood improved a hundred fold. The banking app Harry had got him to sign up for had just received his first deposit. He now had just under $700 to his name. The debit card they’d sent him last week and that he’d stored in his wallet suddenly seemed a lot more useful. He wanted to shout again, but this time, in pure joy. This money was his ticket to wheels. Erin was acting weird as fuck, but tomorrow would be the last time he’d have to deal with him hopefully. He’d secure the nurse’s hand-me-down vehicle as his own then move onto the next part of his plan, to save for his and Jesse’s first apartment.

Shaun was so busy daydreaming, he didn’t notice when Harry finally appeared outside the garage and began jogging in his direction. Several moments later though, when the driver’s side door flew open, Shaun set his phone down and turned to the older man with a start. “Fuck. Harry…I felt like I’ve been waiting forever,” he said thoughtfully.

“How long have you been waiting exactly?” Harry asked as he climbed in beside Shaun. “Stokes is looking for you. He was pissed you weren’t helping your crew break down the truck. He said some other things, too. He isn’t happy, Shaun.”

Shaun shrugged. He felt really stupid admitting he’d had a bad day, but it sounded like he was in trouble now because of it, and if anyone could help him, it’d be Harry. “Honestly? After the day I had, there was no way I was sticking around for more abuse. My crew mates were total dicks today.”

Harry arched an eyebrow. “Wait…who were you with today? This morning Stokes said he’d made you an extra and stuck you with a seasoned crew so you’d learn how to lay pipe. I told him I could teach you, but he wanted me to show Dallas some basics with the pumps.”

“Bobby and his asshole friends didn’t teach me shit,” Shaun grumbled.

“Bobby, Chuck, and Pete?”

“Yeah. They had me dig the same trench three different times. Look at my hands right now.” Shaun held them out, displaying the red, raw-looking skin on his palms from the hard, unforgiving wooden handle on the shovel he’d used. “I was digging for fucking hours.”

“You…were?”

“I mean, Bobby told me to lay pipe after I finally managed to dig the trench to his liking on my second attempt. He didn’t show me how, or even give me a basic rundown on what to do, but I tried to remember what I’ve seen you doing the last two weeks and just copied that,” Shaun said, shrugging again. “It was all wrong though. I don’t even know where I messed up, nobody ever told me, they just forced me to crawl back down in the hole for a third time and dig up everything I’d laid by myself. They called me a bunch of stupid names while I did it, too, and stole my lunch when I wasn’t paying attention.”

“They…stole your lunch?” Harry snorted with amusement. “That’s fucking middle school shit.”

“Yep,” Shaun said, frowning. “I wasn’t laughing though. I was fucking livid. Chuck and Pete ate it right in front of me.”

Harry shook his head. “I don’t know why Stokes keeps putting newbies with Bobby. He’s notoriously mean to anyone that doesn’t have like 5 years of company experience under their belts. I’ve only been here a couple years, but he has to be nice to me. I’m a fucking crew chief, same as him.”

“Fuck him,” Shaun said. “I won’t be here in 5 years. I’ve got better things to do than to work on other people’s houses for the rest of my life. I’ve got albums to record, concerts to headline in, fans to win over…”

“Shit, I hope we’ll be headlining in concerts in 5 years,” Harry said, blinking a few times at the mere thought of it. “That’d be way more than I ever hoped for.”

“We can have it all, Harry,” Shaun said grandly, his frown falling away and a smirk replacing it when he thought about how sour Bobby would be at his imagined and very much hoped for future success. “It all starts with tonight. We all need to be perfect on stage today. There’s no time for anybody to fuck up.”

“No pressure, right?” Harry laughed. “Naw, I’m just joking. You know I’ll do my upmost best, like I do every time we play together.”

“Cool.” Shaun nodded. “That’s all I’m asking for. Your absolute best.”

Chuckling, Harry started the van. “Fuck Shaun… I was going to drag you back in the shop and make you talk to Stokes. He mentioned you’d caused a huge fuck-up today and that he needed to see you before you left, but after what you just said, I’m not about to throw you to the wolves like that. I’ll text him when we get to Gretchen’s and explain what’s going on. Bobby can’t treat people like this.”

“Thanks, Harry,” Shaun said, then relaxed back into his seat as they peeled out of the parking lot. “I swear, I tried to get on their good sides. I worked hard and stayed out of the way. Maybe I talked back a few times and complained once or twice, but for me, I was pretty calm about the whole thing. I let them treat me like crap for 8 hours straight and didn’t kick them in the balls for doing it. Not even once.”

“Trust me, those guys would have deserved it. Any one of them,” Harry said confidently. “Or all three, if you could manage it.”

Shaun curled his lip. “I bet I could manage. I’m pissed enough to do it, anyway.”

Harry nodded understandingly. “I’ll talk to Stokes. Don’t worry about it, man. You won’t have to work with them again.”

“I mean, I will if Stokes demands it, but I won’t be held responsible the next time Bobby fails to do his job. I fucking bit my tongue and did everything he asked of me today. Bobby’s the one who ‘fucked-up’, not me.”

“Mmm,” Harry hummed with agreement as they came to a stop at a red light. They were just seconds away from the on ramp and from there, another twenty minutes to Gretchen’s. Suddenly, Harry glanced at Shaun. “Hey, let me get a quick picture of your hands while I’m thinking about it and I’ll show Stokes when I message him. They’re fucked, Shaun. Are you going to be able to play tonight?”

Shaun considered his sore, reddened palms as he held his hands out again and Harry fished his phone from his back pocket and snapped a quick picture. The second he did, the light changed and Harry tossed his phone on the dash so he could get through the intersection. As he sped up and jumped on the highway, Shaun spoke again. “I’ll put some ice on them before we leave, but it shouldn’t be a problem. I’ve played under worse conditions.”

“You’re a warrior, dude,” Harry said appreciatively. “Nothing ever stops you.”

Shaun smiled languidly in reply. He’d spent less than five minutes with Harry, and already, he was feeling worlds better about himself. Fuck those guys at work. They were miserable and old. They were just jealous Shaun was strong, creative, hot, and that he had his whole life ahead of him still.

When they got to Gretchen’s, Shaun took the first turn in the bathroom, washing up and then changing into a clean outfit. He’d chosen something new for tonight. The fitted jeans he stepped into were becoming a regular part of his wardrobe, but the black, sleeveless muscle tee he pulled on right after was not.

Shaun had made the shirt himself with a pair of scissors after seeing another guy on Facebook do the same thing. He’d totally removed the sleeves from one of his old band tees and cut deep into the sides, so his ribs and toned abdomen showed when he moved his arms. The healing wound he’d added to his collection Monday night was also on display and he hoped Jesse wouldn’t freak when he saw it, but he decided he’d wear the shirt anyway. It emphasized his muscled physique and made his arms look really big and powerful. He’d never been confident enough to wear anything like it before, but he knew it’d help him look like a bad-ass on stage as he ripped into his guitar with his usual impassioned display.

Once he was dressed and Harry was taking his turn in the bathroom, Shaun found Gretchen making a pair of sandwiches in the kitchen. Her cat, Spooky, was sitting primly at her feet, but he leapt up and eagerly rubbed against Shaun’s calf when he stepped into the room.

“Hey monster,” Shaun muttered to the animal. “What are you up to now?”

The cat meowed loudly in response and weaved lazily through his legs a few times until Shaun got the hint and bent down to pet him.

“Why do I feel like that’s a bad meow and that you were up to no good today?” Shaun asked Spooky, not even noticing that he was talking to a cat, totally incapable of human speech.

The cat gazed up at him with his big, yellow eyes and meowed again, just like before. At the counter, Gretchen started to snicker.

“That little shit escaped this morning, after you boys all left for work,” Gretchen said. “I went out to check the mail and Spooky slipped outside and disappeared into the neighborhood for 4 hours straight.”

“So you were up to no good,” Shaun said to the cat, scratching the beast affectionately behind the ear.

“I was in a panic until he popped up again in the backyard. He’s not neutered, you know,” Gretchen said. “I’ve been meaning to get around to it, but I just can’t imagine all the pain he’ll have to go through to get it done. It literally seems like torture to me and I freak out every time I have the money to do it and just end up buying something else so I don’t have to deal with it.”

Shaun rolled his eyes. “Great, so you’re the one responsible for all those homeless kitties. You and your horny black cat.”

Gretchen winced as she added a thin layer of mayo to both sandwiches then closed them up and used the knife to cut them diagonally. “Maybe now that you and Ben are here, you can help me get it done?”

“You people and your animals,” Shaun said, sneering as he thought about Harry’s and Dallas’s conversation the other day about “emotionally abusive” ASPCA commercials. “Stop being so goddamn sensitive. Cutting your cat’s balls off isn’t torture, it’s the easiest and most humane way to control the kitty population. You should do it. For the world.”

“Just…nevermind. I’ll watch Spooky better when the doors are open. I’m not ready to go through with it yet. No way.” Vehemently shaking her head, Gretchen brought both sandwiches to the table on a plate then waved for Shaun to take a seat in front of it. A little surprised by the gesture, Shaun cautiously sat in the chair.

“Uh thanks? I’m starving actually.”

“Harry said some guys at work were hassling you today,” Gretchen said, crossing her arms in a way that kinda reminded Shaun of his grandma. “He says they stole your lunch, too.”

Shaun huffed and glared down at his sandwiches, annoyed his band mates were already talking behind his back about his newest embarrassing experience, but then his stomach rumbled again and he grabbed one of the neat triangles and took a large bite. “Yeah? So?” he asked rudely, chewing with his mouth open and everything.

Gretchen wrinkled her nose a little but didn’t comment. “Harry was texting your boss about it when you were in the shower,” she said. “He read it back to me when he was done so I got the whole story.”

“Good for you,” Shaun sneered around his sandwich. It was tasty, damnit, but Gretchen was being way too nosy for her own good. “Do you want an award or something?”

Gretchen stepped over to the fridge and pulled out two bags of frozen veggies from the freezer. She returned, then set them on the table beside Shaun’s plate. “I saw the picture of your hands. Put these on them for a while. There’s more frozen veggies in there, so trade them out when these ones warm up.”

Shaun snorted, but he rested his damaged left hand on a bag of peas. It actually felt pretty good and he left it there while he finished his food.

Luckily, Gretchen didn’t mention work or Shaun’s tormentors again. She rested her forearms on the back of the chair across from his and leaned into it a bit. “So, are you ready for this weekend? You’re finally gonna see Jesse.” She waggled her eyebrows and Shaun snorted, amused by her crudeness. “We’re even making arrangements so that the two of you will have the whole upstairs room to yourselves. You excited?”

“My cock certainly is,” Shaun drawled, trying to be funny, too.

“Aww, shut up. You better miss him with more than that, you big horn dog!” Gretchen leaned across the table and playfully ruffled Shaun’s hair. It felt… odd and Shaun immediately realized he'd forgotten to take it down after his shower. He tugged the black hair tie out of his bun, then shook out his long, wild locks so they fell artfully around his striking face. Slowly, Gretchen smiled at him. “Looking good, kid. You’re definitely going to break some hearts tonight. I just…hope not Jesse’s.”

“That’s stupid.” Shaun rolled his eyes. “Why the fuck would I do that? I just got him back.”

“I don’t know,” Gretchen said uneasily, and suddenly, she was avoiding Shaun’s questioning gaze. “I’m just hoping we don’t have to go through another repeat of last season’s drama. I’m worried you and Jesse are going to have the same problems as before because you’re still so embarrassed to be gay.”

Shaun flushed at the mere mention of the word and obviously Gretchen had a point. Still, he scowled a little, feeling like he was being lectured. “I can’t fucking help it, okay? I already told you how I feel about everything. It…doesn’t change how I feel about Jesse though. I love him, maybe I just don’t want to scream it from the rooftops like some idiot.”

“Why not, Shaun? Doesn’t Jesse deserve something like that?”

Shaun sighed and wearily rubbed his face. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Well, I think he does,” Gretchen said firmly and Shaun switched to rubbing his temples. “I’m happy you two are finally back together, I am, but I’m scared shitless you’re just going to end up pushing him away again because, let’s be honest, Jesse can’t keep his mouth shut about anything.”

“Nope,” Shaun muttered in agreement.

“Anyway, I’ve been thinking about it a lot since Ben and I started dating for real,” Gretchen said. “The only real solution here is for you to just man up and rip the band-aid off already. Come out, publically,” she pressed and Shaun’s eyes widened in shock. “Stop being so afraid of who you are, Shaun, and please, don’t make Jesse hide his love for you anymore. You should know by now not to take that shit for granted. It can disappear so quickly, in the blink of an eye really, if you aren’t careful.”

Shaun hung his head. He couldn’t find the words to form a good reply, so he didn’t say anything. He knew Gretchen was right about not taking Jesse for advantage, but he so didn’t want to come out, publicly, or otherwise. He was imagining he’d have to do it on stage, in front of a huge crowd of metal fans. It would be a performance unlike any other…

Suddenly, Harry strolled into the room. He was smiling and looking sharp in a faded pair of jeans and his dusty work boots. His blue flannel shirt was open, and his t-shirt underneath rucked up so his belt buckle with a long horn steer head embossed in gold was visible. “How’s it hanging guys? I figure we should leave in an hour. That gives us enough time to get to Beaumont, find the bar, and haul our equipment in before roll call.”

“Shit.” Gretchen pushed herself up from the table. “I didn’t realize it was so late. I’d better jump in the shower, too.”

Nodding, Harry went to the fridge and helped himself to a beer. He caught Shaun’s eye and raised a brow in question and Shaun held up a hand for one, as well. Harry tossed a can over in a smooth, underhand pass.

“Try not to get absolutely blasted before we head out, guys,” Gretchen said distractedly, pausing on her way out of the room to scoop up her cat. “We’ve got a super long night ahead. We’ll need our wits about us.”

“Righto,” Harry said, raising his can in confirmation. “This is my second beer. I’ll call it quits after this, since I’m driving.”

Shaun knew Gretchen was waiting to hear something similar from him and he grumbled unhappily under his breath. He fucking hated watching his alcohol intake. He felt like he was on a fucking diet or something.

“Shaun?” Gretchen stopped in the doorway and turned back, searching for Shaun’s gaze from across the room. “Could you look at me please?”

With another huff, Shaun impatiently met Gretchen’s eyes, already knowing what she was going to say. “What?”

“We didn’t finish talking about Jesse.”

Frowning, Shaun cracked his beer open. “Didn’t we?” He was certainly done. He tipped his can back and took a healthy swig.

Gretchen slung her cat over her shoulder and hugged him around the middle as she watched Shaun guzzle his drink. “I know you’re scared to come out—terrified, even—but Jesse deserves better than being your secret. If you’re not ready to stand by him, really stand by him, then you need to ask yourself if you’re ready for this at all.”

Shaun set his empty can down with a clatter and looked away, the weight of Gretchen’s words pressing down on him. Fucking bitch. She was always right!

“I just don’t want to see either of you get hurt again. I want you guys to have your happy ending,” Gretchen said, smiling, but Shaun didn’t return it. He wasn’t fucking listening to her. He refused to leave the house until he’d had a proper chance to pre-game for the show. There were so many goddamn expectations of him right now! The pressure was starting to become unbearable. “Shaun?” Gretchen asked again and Shaun nearly bit her head off, but instead gestured for Harry to toss him another beer instead.

“Yeah. I hear you,” he grumbled, deftly catching his second can when Harry sent it his way. “I’ll think about it.”

Gretchen’s smile got bigger. “Me, Ben and Harry, we’re all behind you, Shaun.”

“And if you want my advice, which I’m sure you don’t,” Harry chimed in with a chuckle. “I’m with Gretchen. I think you should do it. Being gay isn’t a death sentence anymore. The metal scene can handle it.”

Shaun opened his beer and took another long drink. When he set it down, it was almost empty. “My last band kicked me out because of it,” he said darkly, thinking about Will and Danny, the remnants of Execute Invasion.

“Yeah, well, your last band wasn’t very good, was it?” Harry asked and Shaun snorted and shook his head. “Well, there you go. They aren’t the best examples of the Texas scene then, are they?”

“Fuck….” Shaun muttered. “I guess not.”

Smiling, Harry took a reserved sip off his beer. Shaun started to copy him, then remembered he only had a tiny bit left and grumpily crossed his arms instead.

“Cool,” Gretchen said, still standing in the doorway with the cat. She pressed a happy little smooch on the top of the kitty’s head. “Alright then. I think I said everything I needed to. I’m gonna take that shower now. Hold down the fort, guys!”

Shaun watched her carry Spooky out of the room with narrowed eyes. As usual, she’d said a bunch of shit that he hadn’t liked. He didn’t know what she was expecting him to do, really. He couldn’t get over the fear that embracing his sexuality meant the end of his climb on the metal scene, and fuck, but, he didn’t want that to happen!

“You okay, man?” Harry asked into the sudden silence. He was still standing by the fridge and it reminded Shaun of his mission to get wasted.

“Yup,” Shaun said. “Now give me another beer.”

Faintly, Harry frowned. “Gretchen just told us to cool it on the alcohol…Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Shaun snapped. “Gretchen also told me to come out publically, so everyone knows what a huge fag I am. How the fuck am I supposed to do that sober?”

“You’re not doing it tonight, are you?” Harry asked and Shaun sucked his teeth.

“Isn’t that what Gretchen wants?”

“I don’t think so,” Harry hedged, but he was already opening the fridge again for another beer. “I think she realizes that’s the kind of thing you work up to.”

“When then?” Shaun asked bitterly. “She’s acting like I’m going to lose Jesse if I don’t do it.”

“I…wouldn’t make an announcement or anything,” Harry said, finally stepping away from the fridge so he could hand Shaun his third can. “It’s like the other day at work. You had a perfect opportunity to tell Dallas about Jesse and you chose not to.”

“That’s because I barely know the guy.”

“Yeah, well, that’s kind of what being publically out means though,” Harry said, resting his hip on the edge of the table. “Maybe you don’t have to go around telling complete strangers all your life details, but when you’re getting to know someone, you should probably mention Jesse. He's a big part of your life, you know? I mean, you told Dallas about the band.”

Shaun shrugged.

“When the next opportunity comes up for you to tell someone about your boyfriend, take it,” Harry said. “Nobody’s saying it’ll be easy. Maybe a few times, you’ll even get a bad reaction. But Jesse deserves that kind of commitment from you, I think.”

Making a face, Shaun cracked his beer open. “Yeah, it’s just extremely embarrassing, is all.”

“Its something you’ll get used to doing. It’ll become a habit, after a while, I’ll bet.” Harry took another little sip of his beer. “Most people will be cool with it. And if they aren’t, who gives a shit? They’re probably not worth getting to know anyway.”

Shaun followed Harry’s example, but he chugged his drink. He was starting to feel it work it’s magic and when he set his third empty can on the table, he burped loudly. “Just…drop it. Alright? I’m probably not telling anyone that I’m gay tonight.”

“You never know,” Harry winked at him, then mercifully, he changed the subject. “Did Gretchen tell you? I messaged Stokes when you were cleaning up. He hasn’t said anything back yet, but he read it.”

Shaun nodded. “I got paid, too.”

“Oh great!” Harry beamed. “Just imagine getting that in your account every Friday. Not bad, right?”

“Not bad at all,” Shaun said, thinking about the money in his account. “I’m supposed to pick up a car tomorrow. A…friend of mine is giving me a really good deal.”

“Sweet. Well, let me know how that goes,” Harry said. “No offense, but picking you up adds almost a whole extra hour to my commute.”

Shaun cringed a little. “Sorry.”

Harry waved him off. “It’s fine.”

“And I’ll get around to paying you back for all those snacks and lunches you bought me,” Shaun said. “I’d do it now, but I already promised Gretchen I’d give her food money for the weekend. And I’ve gotta be able to put gas in my car and feed myself next week at work, too.”

Grinning, Harry clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry about it. Just start putting some money aside for you and Jesse. I know you want to get a place of your own.”

Shaun nodded. “The sooner I can do that, the better. He’s…having a lot of problems at home.”

Harry’s smile faded a bit. “Sorry to hear that. I’ll be glad to see him tonight, though. He’s a good kid.”

“Yeah, he is.” Jesse would be getting picked up soon. Dreamily, Shaun imagined him sitting in Ben’s car, his tight little body wiggling with excitement as he got closer to the show, closer to Shaun.

Eventually, Shaun got up to retrieve his fourth beer. Harry didn’t say anything more about his drinking, and Shaun was glad for it. He’d sober up on the ride to the venue anyway. He really didn’t see what the big fucking deal was.

Shaun leaned back against the counter beside the fridge once he had a new can of beer. He wanted to be close so he could easily get another one. He gazed blankly at Harry for a second or two, then a great conversational topic came to mind. He started talking in a low, gravely voice about laying the pipes earlier today at Bobby’s job site, and almost immediately, Harry jumped in and started explaining where he'd gone wrong. They started talking about work and Shaun relaxed. He did his best to put Gretchen’s worries and concerns from his mind. Tonight was going to be amazing. He just knew it.