Josh's Blog - 11. April 2009

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Hey guys!

And, a very happy April Fools’ Day to you!

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Thursday, April 2, 2009

Hey guys!

Looks like the deal is in for David.

Now, all I had to do was find a new name for him. I looked up “David” at a baby name site and found that it means “beloved.” Then I took “beloved” and looked it up at an Indian boy names site and found “Priyaranjan”. That will be his rebirth name when he goes through the initiation ceremony.

I suppose I’ll continue to call him “David” when we’re up close and private, but I suppose I can call him “Priya” for short among family.

You see, the deal is David will be erased from everyone’s memory, including Dad, Jan, Will, and everyone else who knew him except me. I told Jan what would happen and she asked if she would remember that I was once in love with another boy. I told her yes, she would remember that and that his name was David, but when she saw him, she wouldn’t recognize him. She said this sounded too weird and I said that was about how I felt about it.

I told Jan I’d be in and out for the next three weeks because I have to prepare for David’s initiation ceremony since he asked that I be his executioner. I suppose I’ll cry a little when I slice his head off with the sword.

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Saturday, April 4, 2009

Hey guys!

I never thought cutting a person’s head off took so much strength. The longsword I have to use is nearly four feet long with a blade that is three feet long. It weighs three pounds and I have to use two hands to effectively slice through David’s neck. I practice with a melon sitting on top of a long, thick sausage. I can’t hit the melon (David’s head).

Of course, I’ve only done it for two days and I’m still hitting the melon now and then. The executioner said I’ll get better, but if I don’t, he’ll tell the Master Sorcerer that he needs to perform the task. I know that will disappoint David. It’s important not to hit the head for reasons I cannot share.

On the way back home today, I stopped at Orthyrius’s school and visited with David. He’s still a little down. I tried to encourage him to study hard for the initiation ceremony, especially his demonstration spells, which Orthyrius has devised to clearly show David is competent and able to assume the duties of sorcerer’s apprentice.

Unfortunately, the suicide attempt will have a bearing on the final vote of acceptance. To acquire as much support as we can, we’re inviting other apprentices to tutor David on the intricacies of the ceremony. Orthyrius said they would report back to their sorcerers and hopefully acknowledge David is deserving of membership in the Society of the White Crest as a fully competent sorcerer’s apprentice.

I told Orthyrius I was worried, but he said David would be ready.

Before leaving, I spent a little quiet time with David and told him I had come up with a rebirth name I’m certain he will like.

Unexpectedly, he got a little clingy and so I lay down with him on his bed. I held his close as he softly wept. After he fell asleep, I left, promising Orthyrius I’ll return in two days.

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Sunday, April 5, 2009

Hey guys!

Spent the day with Jan. She asked about David and I told her he’s still having trouble coming to terms with his father’s refusal to accept the full import of his decision to ask for healing in exchange for service to me.

We drove over to Madison to shop for our birthday presents. Actually, we were looking for things to suggest to those who might not know what to get us. Scott asked to come along.

We started at West Towne Mall and ended up at Hilldale because Jan wanted to shop for girl things and she said there were better girl stores at Hilldale. Scott and I wandered around looking at food, mostly. I asked how it was going with the other boy and he said they had to stop seeing each other because Phil’s mother didn’t want him hanging around with a faggot. I stopped at looked at him and he simply shrugged his shoulders. He said it hurt for a little bit, but he had a long talk with his dad and everything is hunky-dory, again.

Then he did say he’d like another blowjob if I were willing. I told him I wasn’t his boyfriend, I was his sister’s boyfriend, and while I did do it once that didn’t mean I was going to do it again. He got the saddest puppy dog look I’ve ever seen; so, I walked him over to a corner of the mall and spread a blanket of invisibility around us.

“You’re going to do it here?” he asked.

“Sure, why not?”

“It’s out in the open, everyone will see.”

He tried to walk away, but bumped into the blanket, which has a certain degree of firmness to it.

“What’s this?”

“Do you want it or not?”

“Not here!”

So, I didn’t, but I will go back later tonight.

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Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Hey guys!

More practice with the long sword. The executioner started me on some parrying exercises to increase the strength in my arms and shoulders and to help with the slicing/chopping movement necessary to sever the neck in one fell swoop. It’s not a direct downward movement, but a downward/pulling movement that pulls the blade across the neck while pressure forces it through the spine and soft tissue.

He took me back in time and showed me how he did it on my neck, which was very unnerving, seeing my head bounce on the cold stone floor. He slowed down the motion to where I could see the draw of the blade causing more of a slicing action than chopping. Once I saw what I had to do and how I had to do it, it began to make more sense.

So, from now until the ceremony, I’ll be going to him every other day and practicing. On the alternate days, he’s given me some exercises to develop balance skills and improve my strength and stamina.

He said we really don’t have enough time to get me up to where I should be to perform the act, but my technique and strength should be sufficient to sever David’s head cleanly and correctly, so he is able to look up and see his blood spurting out of the arteries in his neck.

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Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Hey guys!

I spent last night with David. He was, what seems to be almost normal now, sad, teary eyed, and extremely slavish. I could really get tired of his piss-poor attitude if he wasn’t so cute, such a good fuck, and didn’t have the sweetest lips I’ve ever kissed, not that I’ve kissed all that many people in my young life. Yes, I still love him as much as I always have, but he will never love me the same way.

After undressing me, he knelt and took me in his mouth. Sometime in our short history that might have been very nice, but our dynamic has changed and I did not desire the act. I could not get my mind around having him down there doing that to me.

“David, please, lay down with me,” I said.

He came off me and looked up with the strangest eyes. I couldn’t tell if he was disappointed or relieved.

I pulled the bedcovers back and slipped in beside the wall on my left side. When David spooned in beside me, I put my arm over him and pulled his nakedness tight against my body.

“Sleep,” was all I said as I snuggled against him and softly kissed his neck.

In the morning, I awoke to an incredibly warm sensation down there; and, before I could protest, I was overcome with a powerful orgasm. Afterward, David stretched his body over mine and I could feel his desire pressing earnestly against me.

“Fuck me,” I said.

“No, Master, I can’t do that,” David protested.

“Fuck me,” I said. “I don’t want to have to order you or make you do it with a spell. I want you to fuck me as I know deep down in your heart you want to do it. So do it, now.”

When we awoke much later, there was a smile on his face, something I hadn’t seen in many, many months. While he bathed me and then himself, we chatted about mostly nothing. We weren’t friends, though. We’ve moved past the friendship stage into something I can’t quite explain. He is my subordinate. I am his superior. Yet, at moments like this, we seem to slip back to that time we first made out in his house.

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Friday, April 10, 2009

Hey guys!

More sword practice this morning.

This afternoon I went over to Jan’s after school, but she had gone to Fond du Lac with a couple girls at school to shop. Tomorrow night is the senior prom and, yes, I am taking Jan. It’s being held in the cafetorium. The school is bringing in Bobby Cruzer and the Swinging Melody. They’re a bunch of old farts that’ve been playing dance music since the Fifties. That’s dance music popular in the Fifties. Bobby Cruzer, 80, sings and plays the clarinet; Steve Cruzer, 78, plays the drums; Mitch Dogging, 81, plucks the bass; Tommy Dogging, 77, plays the fiddle; Bud Gnitwitte, 80, plays the trumpet; and Skookie Gnitwitte, 78, plays the alto and tenor saxophones. Dad said they cut a few records back in the early Sixties, but never broke out of the Central WI market.

So, that meant only Scott and Mary Lynn were home, but Mary Lynn was walking out the door with a backpack and sleeping bag when I parked my car.

Scott answered the door wearing red bikini underwear and sporting a very stiff cock.

“And, what if I was the old lady across the street asking for a cup of sugar?” I asked as I stood at the door.

“I saw it was you,” Scott said. “Come on up to my room and we can mess around.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Then come on up and watch me jerk off.”

“Watch yourself in a mirror,” I said as I turned to leave.

“I’ll tell my dad you touched me inappropriately.”

I turned to give him the eye, but my eyes went behind him where his mother stood with her hands on her hips. She looked pissed.

“Why don’t you tell your mother,” I said.

“She likes you and knows both of us are gay, so she won’t care.”

“No, I think she does care.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because she is standing right behind you and you’re about to get it. Hello, Mrs. Garrison, Scott here seems to think because I date your daughter he can make me have sex with him.”

“Scott,” Mrs. Garrison said.

Scott’s dick went from raging hard-on to extreme insignificance in a flash.

“Josh, I’d appreciate it if you’d leave,” Mrs. Garrison said. “Jan will be back later tonight.”

“Sure, talk you to later, bye.”

Except, she followed me out to my car.

“I know you’ve done things with Scott a couple times before, but that’s okay with me as long as it’s done without coercion. It’s definitely not okay with his father. He’s okay with Scott being gay, but since you’re dating Jan, I know he’d take a dim view of you and Scott doing things.”

“Scott tried to force the situation.”

“I know, I heard. I’ll take care of him. You’re a good boy, Josh, and Mr. Garrison and I like you a lot, but you know messing with your girlfriend’s little brother is stretching things a bit, if you know what I mean.”

“Sure, Mrs. Garrison, I’ll try to keep my hormones in check when I’m around your son.”

“Thank you. Now, I’d better go see to Scott.”

A few minutes ago, I zipped back to their house. Everyone was in bed, hopefully asleep. I slipped into Scott’s bed and after awakening him, he pushed the covers back and we made out until both us of relieved a day’s worth of sexual tension.

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Sunday, April 12, 2009

Hey guys!

The prom was sooo boring. Come on, this is the Twenty-first Century. I’m positive there are some great-grandpas and -grandmothers out there who like this kind of music, but even the kids around Petawnsky, WI, have outgrown “Mood Indigo,” “My Blue Heaven,” and “Take the ‘A’ Train”.

The food? Well, it was cooked in the school kitchen if that gives you any idea. No, we’d didn’t get steaks, seafood, or pork cutlets. Chicken ala King, frozen green peas, niblets in butter sauce, coleslaw, and a small piece of the congratulatory cake with a dollop of whipped cream.

The best part? I got to dance with Jan.

And then, I took her home.

Today, Jan and I went down to Madison to shop with some of the gift cards we’ve already received. I bought clothes. Hey, with my powers what do I need with technology?

Jan bought a new laptop and a ton of software.

Then we came back here and, since Dad was over at Will’s, we had some serious kissin’ and huggin’. And, yes, she got all googly-eyed with a lot of oohing, aahing, and OMG-ing. I expended two sizable quantities of white, viscous fluid.

Then I took her home, but her parents were in Fond du Lac with Mary Lynn. Scott was there and we caught him jerking off in the living room while watching one of his parents’ porn DVDs. We cheered when he came. He gave us the “you’re number one” sign.

“Is that the one with the guys fucking?” Jan asked, as we sat down at the other end of the sofa.

“Of course, you don’t expect me to watch straight porn, do you?” Scott responded. “Josh, can you get me some real gay porn?”

“Ask your father,” I said.

“He’ll hit me,” Scott whined.

“Make your own,” Jan said.

“And how do I do that?”

“How ’bout I shoot a video of you two doing it?” Jan offered.

Both of us stared at her.

This is my future bride?

“I have to be the top,” Scott said.

“Josh, are you game?” Jan asked.

“Sure, why not,” I said. “We’ll do it for your birthday.”

Scott beamed.

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Monday, April 13, 2009

Hey guys!

Scott’s in the Petawnsky Community Hospital.

A freshman went to his gym locker and when he opened it, Scott didn’t fall out. Some boys beat the crap out of him and stuffed him head first into the locker. The firemen cut out the lockers on either side so the paramedics could safely extract him.

He’ll live.

I’m not so certain about the perps.

I contacted Gregor and asked what I could do without straying to the dark side.

“Give justice a chance,” he said.

He knew that wasn’t the response I wanted.

“If justice doesn’t work, let me know. I might be able to help.”

I went back in time to see for myself. There were five of them. Scott’s no wuss. He’s a running back and will be a star for the Screaming Eagles. He might even score a touchdown or three by the time he graduates.

The other boys don’t play sports. They’re farm boys who belong to a weird Fundamentalist sect in the southeast part of the county. Some people think it’s a cult. From what they did to Scott, I’d have to agree.

There were two sophomores, a junior, a freshman (the boy who Scott had a fling with earlier), and Marv, he’s a senior who weighs about 250 and is mostly muscle. They overwhelmed Scott and beat him down and stuffed him into the locker headfirst. They contemplated shoving the broken broom handle—they used it when beating him—up his ass, but Marv talked the others out of it.

When they left the gym, they got into a van driven by their pastor. The pudgy little bastard is my target. He will not die by my hand, though.

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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Hey guys!

Spent the day working out my frustrations with the longsword.

Spent the afternoon with David.

Brought David home with me.

Tomorrow is Jan’s and my birthday.

Day after tomorrow David will have his final confrontation with his parents and then he’ll cease to exist in the present.

David relieved me of the responsibility for his ritual execution.

The ceremony is set for the Eighteenth. He received more than enough votes for acceptance in the Society of the White Crest as a novice sorcerer’s apprentice.

Scott gave a statement to the county sheriff naming names.

The pastor of the sect is now, or rather the last time I saw him, standing on a small island in the middle of the Okavango Delta, naked. Off in the distance some lions were admiring him hungrily. I think they were wondering what a white man tasted like.

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Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Hey guys!

Hope you got your taxes in. I didn’t. I’m beyond taxes.

The birthday party was a blast. There were gobs of kids, plus quite a few adults including Dad and Will. Scott was up in his bedroom and wasn’t able to come down. I took him a piece of cake with a hefty spoonful of chocolate mint ice cream. (His favorite and mine, too.)

David didn’t show up.

When Dad and I got home, I found David sitting on my bed. He did not look happy.

“It’s over,” he said.

I let Gregor know.

I guess it will happen tonight.

Basically, the spell will go back to when David was supposed to be conceived and will prevent it from happening. It will be as if he’d never been born.

So, how does he exist in the present if he was never born?

I asked Gregor that question, thinking of you guys. Since David is wrapped in the spell in the present, the David that wasn’t conceived isn’t him; therefore, my David continues to exist outside of history.

Yeah, I know, it doesn’t make sense. I thought if the baby wasn’t conceived, the physical David would cease to exist in the present. Somehow the spell takes David out of existence by moving him back in time before the conception—like the way I move back in time—and holds him there until the spell eliminates him in the future. The stickler is David can’t come back to the present until he goes through the ceremony and becomes immortal, therefore, permanently removing him from the constraints of space and time, like me.

Orthyrius came and took David back to get him ready for the ceremony.

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Thursday, April 16, 2009

Hey guys!

Mr. Merkel came to the house this evening looking for David. While he was here, the spell took effect. It was interesting seeing the change. He was standing in the foyer yelling at Dad and me for hiding his son and, suddenly, he can’t remember what he’s yelling about.

Of course, Dad no longer had any memory of David, either. They stood there for a moment until Mr. Merkel said he’d better go home. He looked a little flustered. Well, one minute you’re yelling at a friend and neighbor and then you can’t remember what brought you over to their house.

Dad looked at me and asked if I knew what happened.

“A huge spell took effect and someone no longer is a part of history. You and Mr. Merkel knew this person quite well and now it is as if that person never existed, you can’t have a memory of someone if they were never, ever here.”

“Who was he?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Josh, tell me who is dead.”

“He isn’t dead and someday you may meet him. He’s a very, very close friend of mine and needed to go away, permanently.”

“Was he related to the Merkels?”

“In a way you could say yes, but since he never existed, all memories of him have been erased from time.”

“I thought your magic wasn’t supposed to hurt people.”

“No one has been harmed.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

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Friday, April 17, 2009

Hey guys!

Went over to see Jan after came home from school, except she wasn’t there. Mary Lynn let me in and I went up to spend some time with Scott. His face still looks like shit, but his intrinsic cuteness can’t be hidden behind bandages and bruises.

Anyway, he’s lying in the bed and I’m sitting on the chair at his desk. We’re talking about not a lot of anything and then Scott says, “I was expecting David Merkel, but Jan said he didn’t show up. Do you know what happened?”

“What do you know about David?”

“He’s your boyfriend. What else is there to know? I mean, yeah, he hasn’t been around for quite awhile, but I thought that had to do with the stroke he had. Is he okay?”

I’m thinking why does Scott know about David? How did he get around the spell? Then I’m thinking, maybe Scott is like David and me. Maybe he has magical talent and the spell didn’t have any effect on him.

“Scott? Do me a favor. I’d like you to concentrate on this history book on your desk. See if you can move it to your bed.”

“Oh, that’s easy. I do that shit all the time.”

The book floated over to his bed.

“When did you know you could do that?”

“I’ve always been able. I don’t let other people know, though. I know you’re a sorcerer; do you think I am, too?”

“Not without training, but I think you have the talent. Would you be willing to undergo some testing?”

“You mean I could be like you?”

“Yes.”

I contacted Gregor and he said he’d visit Scott and evaluate him. Gregor did say that, if Scott has the talent, ability, and desire to undergo the necessary training, I might have to relocate because two sorcerer’s need a bit of space between them.

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Saturday, April 18, 2009

Hey guys!

David had his initiation ceremony today.

This was a little different from mine in that the only people in attendance were sorcerer’s apprentices. The Grand Master of Apprentices ordered David to cast a number of spells in increasing difficulty and complexity. He performed each one with ease.

He was the asked to do his demonstration spell. There are a number traditional spells commonly used like changing a dust mote into a tiger and then changing the tiger into a pail of apples; or, any number of alternatives around that theme. David chose something quite a bit harder. First, he created a wall of falling water across the width of the hall. Then his caused the water to fall upward. Then he split the wall in the middle, rotated one-half to perpendicular to the other. Then he brought them together in the middle of the room forming a cross of water. Then he changed the water into fire. Then he rotated the cross faster and faster until it blinked out with a loud bang. It was all for show, but everyone seemed to recognize David was going to be one of the great apprentices.

Then the Grand Master asked who was the novice’s sponsor and Orthyrius presented himself before the dais. I was asked, as the novice’s Master, if I had a rebirth name chosen. This is unique for apprentices because they live outside of reality, more so than sorcerers. I said that the novice’s new name would be Priyaranjan. There was an audible gasp from many of the assembled.

“A most auspicious name,” the Grand Master said.

The executioner came up behind where David was standing before the altar and without hesitation or a word of what was to happen he swung the longsword cleanly, perfectly slicing through David’s neck. He stood there as if nothing had happened and then his body fell out from under his head. Blood squirted everywhere. This was not how it happened to me. At least I had the briefest moment of realization of what occurred. Yet, this is the initiation ceremony for an apprentice that was developed by apprentices. The symbolism was not apparent to me.

The hall went black and some real heavy-duty magic began. There were flashes of red, green, blue, and white light. Lightning streaked throughout the hall grounding out on various candelabra with loud explosions of sparkling globs of ultraviolet. The apprentices seated in benches along both walls began to intone a chant older than language itself.

In about an hour, the candles were relit and Priyaranjan was kneeling before the altar bathed in a bright, sparkling, white light. He rose to his feet, raised his arms and extended them horizontally from his shoulders, and with a flash of lightening, he blinked out.

He’ll come to my house tomorrow, reborn into an immortal body.

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Sunday, April 19, 2009

Hey guys!

Busy day!

First, I wanted to stay home until Priya (David) showed up, but Jan called and wanted me to take her to Madison. When I got over to their house, Gregor met me at the door. He was in his plain brown hooded robe looking about two hundred years old.

“You are well?” he asked.

“I am well,” I said.

“He will be one of us,” he said solemnly. “I have spoken with his parents. I am taking him now.”

“Thank you,” I said with a smile.

“No, do not thank me,” he said looking me straight in my eyes. “This will give you more problems than you are aware. I have spoken to the lad. He is in love with you. When I have finished with him, he will be under your mentorship. In the union of sorcerers, you and he will bond in love, as you are bonded with Ben.”

“But, I haven’t received the Seventh Secret, yet. How can I be a mentor?”

“Life sucks. Sometimes even for sorcerers.”

Jan and I went to the malls in Madison so she could exchange half her gifts. On the way back, she told me we couldn’t get married until she received her master’s degree. I told her she didn’t need a degree to marry me and that I could give her whatever she needed. She said a college degree was more important to her than marrying me.

When we got to her house, I started to get out of my car and help her, but Jan said, “Josh you’re a cute boy and I’d love to get to know you a lot better, but I’m not going to throw away my future with a lot of babies. I hope we can remain friends, but I don’t think marriage in is our future.”

She shut the door and walked into the house.

Maybe I should’ve pled my case more earnestly, but I was more interested in seeing Priya.

He was waiting for me on the sofa. He and Dad were talking. When I walked in Priya rose, walked to me, knelt before me, took my hand and kissed it, and said, “Master I have come as you desired.”

“Priya, please, stand up,” I said. For David to live here, some things had to change right now. Okay, he’s my apprentice, but he isn’t my slave. I’m not going to have him kneeling and kissing my hand. “Priya, as long as you’re in this house, you’re one of the family. Yes, you’re my apprentice, but here in this house and when we’re out and about in the community or anywhere in public, you will act like a normal, regular, American sixteen-old-boy. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Master.”

“No! You know my name and you will use it. I am not your master. I’m the sorcerer and you’re the apprentice. You are not my slave. Do you understand?”

“Sure, Josh, I can do that, but I have been trained to be the way I am.”

“You know, I could force you with magic.”

“That will not be necessary. Where shall I put my things?

I didn’t see any luggage.

“You’ll live with me in my room.”

“No, he’ll have the guestroom,” Dad said.

I’d almost forgotten he was here.

“Okay, the guestroom is now Priya’s room,” I said. “I’m sure Dad won’t mind you arranging it to suit your needs. Right, Dad?”

“That’s fine with me, but, you know, it seems I should know Priya. We’ve been talking and there’s something in the back of my mind that tells me I know him, but I can’t put his face with a name.”

“I was once a real boy. Now, I’m Josh’s sorcerer’s apprentice. Unlike him, I had to give up who I was to become Priyaranjan. The boy who I was is still inside, but I cannot fully expose him to the world. I’m sure Josh is okay with the fact you did know my former self.”

“Okay, I guess I can accept that.”

So, Priya (David) is living in our house until we can build our sorcerer’s retreat out at the farm.

After I finish this, I’m going to go down to David’s room and ask him to come up here. I haven’t made love with him for a long, long time. Maybe I’ll tell you about it tomorrow.

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Monday, April 20, 2009

Hey guys!

Well, well, Priya is definitely going to make Dad and me change to his way of doing things. He made bacon, scrambled eggs, and toast for breakfast this morning. I had to go wake up Dad early. I had to! Dad usually has one of those diet drinks for breakfast, but this morning he ate a full breakfast. He tried to complain about too much fat and cholesterol, but Priya told him to exercise more.

Okay, last night I went down to Priya’s room and said, “David, I want you to come upstairs and make love with me.”

“Master, I cannot do as we once did,” Priya said with downcast eyes.

“David, do you love me?”

“Yes.”

“You know I can make you, but I want you to love me. I don’t give a damn about your apprentice rules. Priyaranjan is my apprentice. David is my lover.”

“Okay, Josh.”

I don’t want to get into any of the grisly details, but, once we got his inhibitions torn away, we did a lot of things we haven’t done in a long, long time. Yes, I took his huge cock and enjoyed it until he couldn’t come again. Then he slept with me until I woke up and smelled the bacon cooking.

I tried to call Jan today, but she wouldn’t answer her cell or return my messages. I called her house in the evening, but her mother told me Jan didn’t want to see or talk to me ever again. She was rather abrupt, too.

David stayed close to me, but he went and slept in his own bed.

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

Hey guys!

It’s been quiet around here.

Priya makes breakfast for us, but at least we don’t have bacon and eggs every day. Today, it was a whole grain cereal with non-fat milk, whole grain toast with butter and lingonberry jam, and coffee, of course.

Priya is working on the plan for our retreat.

I’m working on the Third Secret. This one is a lot tougher than the first two and I suspect they won’t get any easier.

David and I make love every night.

I fear domesticity is settling among us.

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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Hey guys!

Priya and I went out to the farm to survey the situation with the buildings that are still there. The farmhouse is in pretty bad shape, but Priya said he was going to gut it anyway, so it didn’t matter what was wrong with it.

Then there are to two basements; a regular, everyday basement, plus another directly underneath where Priya will have his workshop. Since I am no longer with Jan, Priya will have his room upstairs, across the hall from mine.

I wanted him to share my bed, but he insisted he had to have his own room. Yeah, well, one of us has changed so much sometimes it’s hard to focus on the future. Sometimes, I wonder what life would’ve been like with David neurologically debilitated over one half of his body. Is a whole David, who isn’t the same person, a good thing? I don’t know.

I think, maybe, I need a vacation. I thought being a regular kid was tough, but being what I am now is so hard sometimes I wish I could go back to being a normal, gay kid growing up in Seattle, if such a thing is possible.

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Thursday, April 30, 2009

Hey guys!

Still not much going on.

Priya does all the cooking, cleaning, and is practically the very definition of civility around visitors to the house.

Will came over for supper last night and Priya prepared a chicken, artichoke, sliced tomato, basil, and feta cheese pizza. He made the dough from scratch. We had a very good Lambrusco he heard about during his training. The winery was destroyed in WWII and surviving bottles are very rare. You’d be surprised what magic can do sometimes.

Will was strangely uncomfortable with Priya in the house. I thought it was because Priya acts so much like a domestic, but it wasn’t that. Like Dad, Will expressed the thought that he’d met Priya before, but couldn’t put a name with the face. I was afraid Will was going to go too far, but he stopped short of asking if Priya was in fact David Merkel, not that he had any memory of the Merkel’s youngest son who wasn’t named David, was considerably older than David, and was married with three children and living in Minneapolis.

Priya, for his part, handled the situation quite well.

“I was someone else and then that person died. I am like Josh, but I’m not a sorcerer. I am bonded by oath to Josh for the rest of our lives.”

David and I make love, but still there is a horrible sadness about him I can’t figure out.