Young, Gay and Scared - 10. Chapter 10

10.1

Tomas was discharged several days later when all the tests showed a positive recovery. It was about mid-day when he arrived home and went straight to bed. His mother fussed around trying to make him comfortable.

“Now you just rest and sleep as much as you can. Here’s the pain tablets the doctor prescribed for you; take two tablets when you need for the pain. Now I’ll get you a light lunch of sandwiches, which will see you through until dinner time. Just yell if you need anything baby, I’ll be right outside.”

When Shirley brought the tray of sandwiches, Tomas thanked her in a tired voice,

“I’m not very hungry mum, just leave the sandwiches on my table and I’ll eat them when my appetite returns. For now, I just want to sleep.”

Colin Davis came home about six in the evening, and when tea was ready he popped into Tomas’s room.

“Tomas, Tomas wake up, dinner’s ready. C’mon son, you’ve got to eat, wake up now.”

Awakened from his sleep, Tomas looked around unsure of his surroundings. Eventually,

‘(Yawning) Hi dad, ummm, what time is it?”

“Going on for a quarter to seven, and your mum’s got tea ready. C’mon get up and eat with us.”

‘Dad, I’m really not hungry; mum gave me some sandwiches early-on and that’s all I need right now. Tomorrow I’ll feel better and I’ll eat then. Sorry, all I want to do now is sleep. Please understand.”

“(Sigh) Ok, but I want to see you on your feet as soon as you can. You can’t stay in bed all the time. I suspect bed’s a safe place for you, eh? No hostiles to hurt you. I suppose I can understand, but sooner rather than later, you’ve got to face the world again. Just remember son, we’ll always be with you no matter what.”

‘Are you telling me you’re happy having a piece of filth for a son?”

‘Don’t say that! Don’t ever say that! Whatever difficulties you have, we’ll go through them with you. I’m not gonna fight your battles, but I’m sure as hell gonna weigh in if anybody harms you again. Bank on it!”

“You and mum are the best parents a bloke can have. I wish I was normal and not cause you any hurt. You deserve a better son. I love you Dad, you and mum, I love you both very much.”

‘And we love you too son, we’ll do anything to get you through this nasty period. Doctor Matt gave me the name of another medic who can help you in . . . in, ummm . . . your condition. As soon as you’re on your feet we’ll go see him. So, take heart Tomas, it’s gonna get better for all of us. Now rest, and goodnight son.”

Dinner ready, Colin and Shirley sat down to eat. It was lonely eating without Tomas, but if he wished to sleep that was OK; after all the boy had just had a very nasty experience and needed all then rest his body demanded.

“What are we going to do Colin, every time I think of those boys attacking Tom I get so angry. What I can’t understand is how the Cree’s can have one son who's a bastard and the other an angel. What’s your read?”

(Putting his knife and folk down) That I don’t understand, it beats me; maybe they have different fathers, who knows. I’ve been thinking what to do, but the thing is we’ll have to wait and see what the cops do. Matt told me their interview with Tomas turned into an inquisition. They were trying to make Tom a villain instead of the victim; apparently, the young constable was very objectionable, so Matt ordered them out. I wish I’d been there to see it. He’s a good cove is Doctor Matt.”

“(Hopefully) He is, and I’d like to take up his suggestion about Tomas going to see the psychiatrist. It couldn’t hurt, but any recommendation to give my baby this aversion treatment I won’t abide. It’s just too awful.”

“Yes, I agree. I was really taken with Matt’s comment about society being the problem, not Tom. (Thoughtful) Why should we abuse our son with these mediaeval tortures when his only problem is he’s attracted to his own sex. That comment resonated with me very much. Anyway, I’ll check in on him later, so for the time being, let him, and us, rest.”

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10.2

“Alright, let’s go into the Interview room where we can have a talk. I’m glad (Nodding to Fred Cree and Harry Cradox) that you’re both here as we talk to your sons about the attack on Tomas Davis.”

Sergeant Malloy settled the two boys in chairs opposite him at the interview table. He was joined by Constable Burrows, whilst the two fathers sat in chairs behind their respective sons. After Tomas had named Bert and Martin as his attackers, Jock Malloy wasted no time in bringing the boys in for a formal interview. The Manly police station was old, having been built at the turn of the twentieth century, so it wasn’t a fun place to be. The room had a small ledge running around about chest high; the walls were painted green below and white above. The only window didn’t allow much light and couldn’t diffuse the room’s drabness. It was excellent for interviewing hardened criminals and overwhelming for two young teenagers. At a nod from Jock, the constable turned on the interview tape machine.

“We (naming himself and the constable) are interviewing (boy’s names) regarding the attack on a student of Manly Boy’s High, Tomas Davis. Also present are the boy’s fathers (naming the fathers). Can I start with you Bert. As I’ve told you, Tomas Davis named you as one of the persons who attacked him in (naming the street) on Monday (establishing the date) at (establishing the time of day) How do you respond to this accusation?”

‘He’s a fuck’n liar! I was nowhere near the creep. I was with me mate Biffo . . .. err Martin. We was at his place doin’ our homework. He’s a bloody poofter and I won’t have anything to do with the piece of filth. He probably put the hard word on some decent cove and got bashed instead.”

(From Fred Cree) Sergeant me son’s a good boy, goes to church, has a girlfriend, and respects his parents. I know he wouldn’t do what that disgusting mongrel suggested, take my word for it.”

“It’s not a suggestion Mr Cree, it’s a formal charge, and we have to take action.”

“Well, why don’t you go and charge that deviant, as far as I know being a queer is still a crime, ain’t it? Why are you wasting time hassling these two good young lads.?”

“Woowa, I’m here to interview the two lads sir, not have a discourse with you or Mr Cradox. You are to stay quiet and let me do my job. Understand? (Cree reluctantly nodded) Good.”

Now Martin, how do you respond to the charge Mr Davis has made against you, that you assaulted him at (naming the street) on Monday (establishing the date) at (establishing the time of day) What’s your answer?”

“It’s bullshit! Plain bullshit. I ain’t never touched the creep, just a look at ‘im makes me wanna puke. No sir, I done nuthin t’him.”

“(The Sarge addressed Bert) Can you tell me why Mr Davis would make up such a story? I mean he accused you both out of all the other kids at school. Why would he do that?”

“I dunno, why don’t ya ask him. Maybe he’s got the hots fer me and knows I’d bash him if’n he touched me. That’s all I can say. I didn’t touch him.”

“And I agree with Bert, I haven’t touched him. The time you mentioned, me and Bert were doin our homework. Did anyone else reckon they’se seen us or is it just the poofter whose makin’ up these lies?”

“Martin, you don’t ask questions. I ask the questions and you answer them. Understand? Now Martin when did you and Bert leave school on that day, with all the kids or later?”

“Definitely later. Me and Bert stayed late and then went to his place to do our homework.”

“When was the last time you saw Tomas Davis, Martin?”

“Huh? What that got t’do with anything. Why ya asking me that.?

“Just curious. Please answer the question. When was the last time you saw Tomas Davis?”

“I suppose at lunch. He were sitting out under a tree. The queer wouldn’t mix with us normal folks.”

“And what was he wearing?”

“Umm, his school uniform I guess, and yeah, his raincoat; he was wearing his raincoat.”

“I see . . . umm . . . you definitely saw him in his raincoat, yes?”

“Yes, he was wearing his raincoat because it were raining.”

“That’s strange Martin. I don’t remember it raining till well after lunch around 3 ^pm. We’ll check with the weather people to confirm this, as I’m sure they will. This means you couldn’t have seen Mr Davis in the schoolyard wearing a raincoat. I’m curious, if you and Bert Cree were the last to leave, as you testified, how do know Mr Davis was wearing a raincoat?

“Well I just guessed he were wearing a raincoat. Why are you asking me stupid questions?”

“Martin, I ask the questions. I find it strange that you would stipulate he was wearing a raincoat when you didn’t see Mr Davis leave school. Your testimony.”

“What’s stip . . . stip . . . late mean?”

“Stipulate? Sort of means confirm.”

“Look, Sergeant, I don’t like the way you’re badgering my son. He’s only fifteen and is getting confused. I’ve a mind . . .”

“You’ve a mind to do what Mr Cradox? Don’t interfere with my questioning or I’ll have to ask you to wait outside.”

“Martin, I believe the only way you knew Mr Davis was wearing a raincoat was when you assaulted him. Isn’t that right?”

“NO! . . . No, I didn’t”

“No way Sergeant, me and Martin never assaulted the fagott.”

“How dare you threaten my son, Sergeant, I’ve a mind to report you to . . . to . . . well, your superior.”

‘That’s your prerogative, Mr Cree. I’ll give you my superior’s name if you like. But before you rush out and embarrass yourself, might I remind you this interview is being taped. Now I’m going to finish the interview now, but after we’ve investigated further, I’ll probably need to talk to you boys again. I’m not happy with your response to my questions. Of course, at any time you can alter your statements if you so wish.”

 

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10.3

Tomas Davis passed away in the wee small hours of the day after his release from hospital.

He had planned his passing by using the pain killer tablets the hospital supplied. His father looked in on him when he went to bed about ten thirty and Tomas looked to be fast asleep. His death was a combination of overdosed tablets and just a simple lack of will to live. His final note said,

I’ve brought too much pain to the people I love most.

My life is over. I have no future

I have to do this. Please don’t hate me

I love you both,

Tomas

Colin Davis discovered him next morning when he went to wake his son up. By that time, Tommo was quite cold and quite dead.

Standing at the stove, Shirley Davis heard a guttural unnatural sound, a sound that sent a wave of terror through her. It was a sound that alerted her mother’s instinctive fear that something was terribly wrong. In panic she rushed into her son’s bedroom and stopped, taking in the tragic tableau confronting her. Colin was standing bent over, making animal noises and looking at the cold, inert body of his son. She took one look, emitted a scream, and collapsed on the floor.

For a moment the only sound was Colin’s primitive noise. Tomas lay dead on his bed and his mother lay collapsed unconscious on the floor.

Recovering slightly, Colin quietly made his way to their phone in the hallway. First, he called an ambulance and then the police. The eerie silence in the house was suddenly transformed by the noise of the ambulance arrival and then the cops, headed by Sergeant Malloy.

As required by law, Tomas was officially declared dead by the paramedics, who then turned their attention to Shirley Davis. As well as being unconscious, she had the signs of going into shock and thus required hospitalization. All through this, Colin Davis just sat with vacant, unfocused eyes, emitting pitiful unrecognizable sounds. He started to revive when a young female policewoman – herself in tears – handed him a cup of tea. When he was able to talk properly, he responded to police questions, summarizing events, from his arrival home the previous night, until the present.

Speedily, as required by law, the police informed the Coroner, and then the Suicide Crisis team. This latter was responsible for contacting, then counselling the immediate family, the extended family, close friends and then Tomas’s school. His farewell note was picked up for eventual forwarding to the coroner.

At Ryan’s house, Merle took the call from the Crisis team and after a cursory ‘thank you’ put the receiver down and made the sign of the cross. She then called Ryan’s school and spoke to her grandson. Up till the time of her death, she would always remember the anguished response from Ryan. Some matters are burned indelibly into a person’s conscience.

The news rocketed through the community. Why? How could a boy so young sacrifice his life for . . . what? The rumour-mill, operating in over-drive, put forward many plausible reasons, but no one knew the truth. People waited feverishly for the Coroner’s Inquest to begin and thus divulge what happened.

When the news reached Tomas’s school, Allan Wilcox replaced the receiver with a feeling of dread. A rational man, he knew the bullying of Tomas Davis would become a factor in any inquisition into the lad’s death. Also a factor, was his inaction to stop the harassment. Also, what role did his secretary play in releasing the details of the boy’s expulsion from the Christian College? He felt sick.

When told of the boy's suicide, Vera Primson became distraught. Convinced she was the source of the original rumour, she became weighed down with guilt. On the other hand, Gladys the nurse simply said, ‘good riddance’ and admonished Vera for being such a ninny. The students became distressed, each one remembered how cruel they were to Tommo and convinced themselves they were responsible for his demise. An emotional earthquake rocked the school.

Ryan was inconsolable. He left school about 12 pm, facing a lonely trip home. It was hard to believe, Tommo – dead. It wasn’t possible, people didn’t die until they were old like his grandmother. No one died at fourteen years. All the way home in the ferry and then bus, memories of his time with Tommo flashed in and out of his conscience. He hadn’t cried yet – that was to come. On reaching home his mother, probably for the first time in her life, thought of someone besides herself. Walking in the front door he ran straight to his Nanna and burst into tears. They were joined by Clare Seaton who was, strangely, very emotional; after all, it could’ve been her son.

It wasn’t until late afternoon that Ryan, Geoff, and Bluey caught up. The three boys sat on Ryan’s back steps and considered what happened.

“God I feel rotten fellas, I keep thinking what I could’ve done to help him. I’ll let you into a secret, some months ago we became blood brothers. That’s why I feel so bad. I did nothing to help me brother and that’s why I’m feelin’ guilty.”

“Hey Ryan can it! You feel guilty, what about me? It was my brother who attacked him and landed him in hospital. I should’ve done something . . . anything, to tell the cops what I know. I don’t care if’n he’s me brother, what he and that imbecile Biffo Maddox did was criminal and surely convinced Tommo that life weren’t worth living. No, I gotta big load of shit guilt on me shoulders.”

“C’mon mates, feelin’ guilty ain’t healthy. If Tommo was here he’d tell you’se to can it. It were the school that killed him. Once the word got out, and we don’t know how, Tommo’s life became hell. The atmosphere at school is bad (Geoff nodded), everyone is remembering the insults, the shunning, the shoving, and the whispering that they done to him. The sheilas were the worst of all and I hope they’ve learned a big lesson. I’m gonna rub it in any chance I get! The cunts!”

Long silence. Each boy had his own thoughts and memories of Tommo. It was Ryan who started to weep, followed soon by Geoff and Bluey. Their loss was raw and would get worse in the following days.

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10.4

The legal process became alive when the Police, in the form of Sergeant Jock Malloy, requested a Coronial Inquest. There were just too many loose ends about Tomas Davis’s case, and he suspected the presence of contributory negligence. He also wasn’t satisfied with Cradox and Cree, being suspicious of their involvement in the attack on Davis. If Cradox could be put on the stand he’s sure the boy would crack. Colin Davis had also been thinking along the same lines. There was no doubt, Tomas’s life had been miserable because the school had turned against him. In his layman’s mind, Manly Boys High had a duty of care and they had failed miserably. Nothing would bring Tomas back, but hopefully, the lessons learnt would help other kids in trouble.

At first, it was necessary for the coroner to investigate whether an Inquest should be held. The written advice from Jock Molloy and Colin Davis were sufficiently convincing so a date and place were established.

With an Inquest pending, no funeral arrangements could be made so it was necessary to hold a hearing as quickly as possible. The appropriate public notices were posted and subpoena’s to appear as witnesses sent out to persons of interest.

It was three days after Tom’s demise when Vera, Gladys, and the Headmaster were individually served subpoenas. Vera was appalled, never before had she been asked to appear at an inquest, and the prospect alarmed her. Allan Willcox had the same reaction. As Headmaster he was ultimately responsible for the student's welfare. Looking back, he knew he was in trouble; all he could do was assist the Inquest by telling the truth even if he damned himself. Martin Cradox and Bert Cree were served their subpoena’s during school hours and from that point on became ostracized by the other kids. They weren’t popular, they bullied, and many kids wanted to see them toppled.

In the meantime, Shirley Davis was discharged from hospital, but she looked pitiful. Her eyes projected indescribable sadness and her actions almost robotic. His wife’s descent into darkness motivated Colin to call, no demand, a Coronial Inquiry. It wasn’t just Tomas who died that night, it sounded the death-knell of a family. Someone had to pay for this. It was important that the truth be known.

A lawyer was appointed as Counsel for the Coroner, a position not unlike a prosecutor in a normal trial. His role was to assist the Coroner in the process. On the appointed time, at the appointed place, the hearing began. As a preliminary, the coroner had read evidence from the doctor who declared Tomas dead, the Police, and then the boy’s father. He also was given a statement by Matt, the doctor, detailing all of Tomas’s injuries following the attack, so by the time the hearing began he was fully acquainted with the case.

The Coroner began by re-visiting Tomas’s death in the form of medical records, police statements and interested parties, such as the boy’s father.

As first witness, Colin Davis outlined his son’s descent into darkness. He admitted the episode with the boy at the Christian College but stressed he paid the penalty by being expelled from the school. He also outlined the legal steps taken to have the matter sealed because of the lad’s age. How the file’s content became public knowledge was a matter for the court to determine. He completed his testimony with this,

“My son was made a criminal simply because he was different. Yes, he was a homosexual and at present time being such is regarded as a crime. How could it be, I repeat how could it be, that a young lad of fourteen years be sledge-hammered by society because of something he had no control over. He was borne a homosexual . . . there was no choice involved. I mean, ask yourselves, why would any person choose a life of enduring pain? (Turning to face the Coroner) Would you sir, would you choose a life of misery over a lifetime of happiness? I challenge anyone in this room that they would willingly make such a choice. The medical profession does not know how a person is borne a homosexual, and I suspect it will be some time before the origin is identified. Finally, I want to read out the note my son left; it is clear he decided to end his life because of the harsh bullying he received at school.”

As Colin Davis read aloud Tommo’s last words there was nary a dry eye left in the courtroom. Colin continued,

“I’ll just finish by saying some of us are borne attracted to the other sex, and others are borne with an attraction to their same sex. It’s just nature and just that simple. Thank you.”

Complete silence followed Colin’s impassioned statement. The Coroner paused proceedings to make lengthy notes. The next witness was Doctor Matt Hardon, who gave the court a summary of Tomas’s injuries. He described the attack as brutal.

“In my experience as an Emergency room doctor, I see many injuries, some of which are gruesome and are usually the result of some kind of accident. Not so in Tomas’s case, the attack was brutal, carrying a level of savagery that is disturbing. In my opinion, it was personal and frenzied. Whoever carried out the attack has serious problems; he or she has a violent personality and should be regarded as a threat to society. I don’t want ever to see a young person admitted to hospital beaten up as was Tomas.”

The Coroner thanked the doctor and released him. The Inquest entered the examination phase and the next witness was called - Margaret Carney, Secretary to the Headmaster of The Christian College. After her credentials were established, the Coroners Assistant, Warren Cox, addressed Miss Carney.

“You’re familiar with what happened when the file on Tomas Davis was sealed?”

‘Yes, I . . . I umm, was.”

‘So how do you explain the contents becoming public knowledge? As have been established the seal was unbroken so knowledge the contents had to be verbal. Is that correct?”

“I . . . err, I . . . suppose so.”

‘You suppose so, you suppose so. Really, Miss Carney, I put it to you that’s a very evasive answer.”

Silence.

“Alright, I want you to consider my next question very carefully. Be advised you’re under oath and the penalty for lying under oath is jail. (Pause) Did you at any time discuss the contents of Tomas Davis’s file with anyone after the file was sealed? Be careful now.”

There followed a prolonged silence, almost an admission of guilt in itself.

“(From the Coroner) Miss Carney, you must answer the question otherwise you’ll be in contempt of court. Please answer.”

“Yes.”

“Louder please, we can’t hear you.”

“Yes! . . . yes, I did. Oh god, I’m so sorry. The Manly Boys High school contacted me and convinced me that it was in the school’s best interest to find out why the boy had been expelled. I . . . (choke) I . . . thought they should, so . . . I . . . told the secretary of the Boys High what he was expelled for. My Christian learning told me these people were sinners and would go to hell. I knew our laws considered these people as criminals, so I didn’t think I was doing anything wrong. I’m . . . (sob) . . . so sorry.”

“Did you stipulate any conditions on sharing the information?”

“(Angry) Of course I did! I’m not a complete idiot! I stressed the information go no further than between us. I was assured of this.”

“So, in a sense, you were betrayed, is this so?”

“Yes, yes, yes. When I learnt what happened I became sick. I’ve been at the Christian school for twenty-four years and this is the first time I’ve done something knowingly wrong. I relied on the integrity of my opposite number. Yes, I was betrayed. I’m so angry.”

(The Coroner) Alright, Miss Carney, you may step down. We may need to recall you so please keep yourself available.”

“I believe it would be appropriate to call Miss Vera Primson to the witness stand. Vera walked hunched up and unsteadily into the court and was barely able to repeat the oath. After she haltingly said, ‘I do’ Warren Cox, the Council Assisting, wasted no time in questioning Vera. After she established her personal data and professional status, he asked,

“It has been established that Margaret Carney, of the Christian school, responding to your personal request, advised you the contents of a sealed file in respect of a student Tomas Davis. That is correct is it not?”

‘(Sounding hollow) yes, but at the time my Headmaster asked me to find out why this student had been expelled from his former school because it could be detrimental to the running of our school and I thought this was a good idea as not to know would mean a danger to the other students and then I thought about a criminal and Satan’s plaything running around our school corrupting. . .”

“Excuse me miss Primson, but you’re rambling and all I ask is a straight yes, or no. Now is the stipulation by Miss Carney correct?”

‘Yes, but you see . . .”

“Nothing more please; your answer is ‘Yes’ is that correct?”

(The Coroner) In future Miss Primson, please restrict your answers to a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ please. (she nodded).

“Now Miss Primson, I want you to be careful how you answer my next question. I remind you you’re under oath. Did you at any time and in any manner pass on what you’d learned from your counterpart at the Christian College to someone else?”

“Yes.”

“Sorry, I didn’t hear that. You must speak up, so the court can hear you. Once again what is your response?”

“Yes, yes. I mentioned to our nurse Gladys Chalmers what I’d been told but you see the headmaster told me he would speak to Gladys and also the Pastor, Cedric Bottomly so I assumed there wouldn’t be any trouble in . . .”

(The Coroner) Miss Primson, you’re rambling again, do I have to remind you to keep your answers brief.”

“But I can’t your majesty, I’m so nervous and so worried that I might’ve caused that young boys early death. I’m a good girl sire, and would not do anything wrong I go to church and can recite the whole bible I’ve always been good to my parents and cried helplessly when my mother passed away now I’m worried that the boy died in a state of ungraced and will not go into the arms of our lord Jesus Christ and will forever be consumed by the fires of hell won’t you . . .”

(BANG!) enough! You are rambling again madam and disrupting this court. Mr Cox can you excuse this witness for further examination. I want her to take time to get herself under control.”

Suddenly Vera Primson began to cry, sobbing loudly into a handkerchief.

“Yes, your Honour, I’ll discharge her until I need further information.”

(The coroner) Miss Primson, you may step down but be available to be called again at moment’s notice.”

After a short adjournment, Cox called Gladys Chalmers to the stand, and she looked formidable. One of her noticeable features were her eyes, large round eyes, which dominated her face. With these domineering eyes, she stared hostilely at the counsel Cox almost daring him to best her. He went through the usual establishment questions before focussing on the main issue.

“Now Miss Chalmers let us move to the phone conversation you had with Miss Vera Primson on (naming date) . . .”

“What of it?”

(Ignoring) The conversation centred around the reason Tomas Davis was expelled from the Christian school. Is this correct?”

“Yes.”

“I note you have a somewhat louder voice than most. Is this a normal voice for you?”

“Yes.”

“We also note that a student Martin Cradox sat outside your surgery during the phone call and it’s fair to assume he could’ve overheard your conversation with Miss Primson?”

“Yes.”

“Did you try and establish if he had heard the conversation?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Just didn’t.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Just didn’t.”

“(Exasperated) Ok, we must assume the student heard the conversation in part or in full. Thank you, Miss Chalmers, you may step down now. Call Martin Cradox.”

Now there was a rustling accompanied by a low murmur as the onlookers sensed an important testimony was about to begin. The Cradox boy was accompanied by his father, who sat on a chair facing his son in the witness stand. Martin had already met Warren Cox who had explained the court’s procedures, his role, the boy’s father’s role, and Martin’s responsibilities in giving evidence. This was established custom when dealing with juveniles, in the 1950s.

Martin Cradox looked ill. All the usual bravado was gone, replaced by a heart-rending timidness. Cox spent some time relaxing the boy and trying not to be adversarial. With all the background questions established, Cox became specific.

“Now Martin you took an oath to tell the truth didn’t you? (Martin nodded) Yes, you must tell the truth because lying can bring sharp penalties. We talked about this didn’t we (Martin nodded) I’m sure your father has explained this to you (again Cradox nodded). Ok, did you hear the conversation between Miss Gladys and Miss Vera whilst you were waiting for the nurse to attend to your hand?”

“Well, I heard bugeyes (general laughter) err, I mean, the nurse, talk to someone about Davis being a fagott and all. I didn’t know who she was talkin’ to. She’s got a voice like a foghorn so I wus able to get the gist of what she done said.”

“And what did you do after you left the nurses surgery?”

“I told Bert, umm, Bert Cree and then he told Sally Perkins who promised to keep a secret. Ha, Ha . . . that little bitch’s got verbal runs, and before the day ended the whole school knew about Davis bein’ a poofter. I done nuthin wrong did I?”

“No Martin, you didn’t do anything wrong, we just wanted to know how the word got out about Tomas Davis so quickly. Thank you for your honesty Martin, you’ve done well. (Martin went to stand up, but Cox stopped him) Just one more thing lad and you can go with your father back home. Where were you on (naming date) the day that Tomas Davis was savagely attacked?”

A change in demeanour swept through Martin, he became fidgety and looked miserable. He kept glancing at his father.

“What’s your answer Martin?”

“Umm, I was at home doin’ me homework.”

“I see, but in a statement to the police, you said you were at Bertram Cree’s place doing your homework. Which is it?”

“Sorry but I got mixed up, it’s what I told the cops, we wus at Bert’s place, fer sure.”

“Good, and according to your statement to the police, you and Master Cree were probably the last to leave school on that day. That is still your account is it not?”

“Yeah, we’se were helping clean up our room. That’s what I said, yes sir.”

“I see, and you mentioned the last time you saw Tomas Davis he was wearing his raincoat. Is that correct?”

“Yes, he were.”

“For the benefit of the court, we stipulate that Tomas Davis was wearing his raincoat during and after being savagely attacked. (Looking at Martin) How is it Martin that you knew Davis was wearing a raincoat when he left school well before you. I put it to you that you only saw Master Davis wearing his raincoat when you and Bert Cree attacked him?”

Martin knew he was trapped, the same as when the cops interviewed him. Now, being confronted with the same scenario, he had sworn an oath to tell the truth, and he became petrified.

“I . . . err . . . I dunno sir, maybe . . .”

“(The Coroner) it is my duty to advise you Master Cradox that you shouldn’t answer that question if it may incriminate you in a chargeable offence.”

“I don’t know what’s incrim . . . what you said, what’s ya mean?”

“Well, I’ll try and make it plain. You can answer the question three ways – ‘yes’, ‘no’, or ‘refuse to answer because your answer may cause you trouble with the police’. If you answer ‘yes’ then the matter will go to the police to assess if they should lay charges against you, if you answer ‘No’ but subsequently we find you’ve lied to the court then that would be a big problem resulting in jail time. You must be honest Martin, you’ve sworn to tell the truth. Do you understand what I’ve said?”

“Yes . . . umm, . . . Dad?”

Father and son then went into a huddle whilst the courtroom waited. Eventually,

“I can’t answer because if I do I’ll be in the shit!”

There was a long silence as both the Coroner and Warren Cox stared at Martin, who by this time, was sweating profusely.

‘(The Coroner) I’ll mark the record that you have refused to answer, as in doing so, you may incriminate yourself. Any further questions Mister Cox?”

“No sir. Please call Allan Wilcox, Headmaster of Manly Boys High. “

This was to be the highlight of the enquiry, and the courtroom became tensely silent. After the preliminaries, Cox became aggressive.

“Mr Wilcox are you familiar with the law relating to Duty of Care in respect of school children.?”

(Softly) yes, . . . err, yes I am.”

“Thank you. Are you also aware of the guidelines set down by the state Department of Education? I refer specifically to Bullying.”

“(Almost whispering) yes, yes I am.”

“Please speak up Mr Wilcox so the court reporter can hear what you say.”

“When were the details of Tomas Davis’s expulsion brought to your attention?”

“Ahh . . . it is my policy to interview each new student before they commence school proper. I interviewed Mr Davis prior to his commencement as a new student. The transfer papers indicated the reason for expulsion was ‘unacceptable behaviour’. This concerned me, so I determined to find out details as I didn’t want any troublemaker influencing the other students.”

“I see. You then asked your secretary Miss Vera Primson to find out more, she having contacts within the education system. Correct?”

“Yes.”

“And subsequently you were advised that Tomas Davis was a homosexual, and had indulged in unacceptable behaviour?”

“Yes.”

“Then, unfortunately, the status of Tomas Davis as homosexual became common knowledge throughout the school. Correct?”

“(Sigh) Yes, unfortunately, that is correct. I don’t know how that came to be. The lad was a good student and behaving meticulously in his time at school. That’s where the tragedy begins, I . . .”

“Thank you. I have here written statements from teachers, the boy’s father, and several students that Tomas Davis became a victim of severe bullying to the extent that he was in physical and emotional danger. Are you aware of these statements, Mr Wilcox?”

” (Sigh) Yes, yes I am.”

“The record also shows that several teachers contacted you because they were worried about the bullying the Davis boy was experiencing. Do you recall meeting with these teachers?”

“(Sigh) Yes, yes I do.”

“And what action did you take following the teachers representations to you?”

Silence.

“(The Coroner) Please answer the question, Mr Wilcox.”

“I . . . err, . . . I err, . . . none. I didn’t take any action.”

“Why not?”

Silence – it was a very loud silence.

“(The Coroner) once again Mr Wilcox I direct you to answer the question. If I have to keep reminding you, I’ll hold you in contempt. Please answer the question.”

Allan Wilcox seemed to deflate. He literally sagged; his face had a haunted look.

“(Tersely) Oh how clever it is to be so wise after the event. Has anyone forgotten that Homosexuality is a crime and as someone said recently ‘homosexuality is the biggest problem facing our Community’. I didn’t want a homosexual in my school and I honestly thought if the harassment was heavy enough the boy would leave and go elsewhere. That was how my mind reacted to the harassment. I believed I was acting in the interests of my students to remove this cancer from the student body. I did what I thought I had to do. Having said that, when news of his suicide reached me I threw up. I was appalled, saddened, and mortified. I never considered he would take such extreme action. Never. (Long Pause) I’m so guilty, so, so very guilty. I put my abhorrence of homosexuality ahead of my duty of care. I can’t undo what I did, I take responsibility for what I did, and am devastated that my actions resulted in the death of a young boy. I can’t ask for forgiveness, because I can never forgive myself.”

“So, you plead guilty to not honouring your Duty of Care as you are required to do by law and your own Education department guidelines. Is this correct?”

“Yes, yes I am, but before you arrest me, I want you to consider this. What has happened is solely because society is wrong about Homosexuality and Homosexuals. For the last few days I’ve been doing research and have found not one single plausible reason why we treat homosexuals in such a degrading way. Looking at the facts, and they exist in plain sight, there is no reason why society should condemn homosexuals. They are just ordinary folk who just simply have an attraction to their own sex. It’s as simple as that. Tomas Davis was a wonderful young man with his future ahead of him. He would have been a valuable member of our society until someone such as I, and the dictates of society condemned him. He wasn’t wrong (looking sternly around the room) we all are. To Mr and Mrs Davis, I’m so sorry, so very, very sorry.”

The court was stilled as each person considered Allan Wilcox’s words. The majority were against him, but the few that agreed with his statement boded well for the future.

<><><><>

10.5

Several days after the Inquest closed, the Coroner issued his report. He listed Tomas’s death as ‘Death by his own Hand’ but with contributing circumstances. Then his report went on to name Allan Willcox, Margaret Carney, Vera Primson, as the persons primarily responsible for causing Tomas’s details becoming public. No further action was required.

However, Martin Cradox and Bertram Cree were named as hastening Tomas’s demise and should be investigated further. Allan Wilcox received the harshest criticism in that he failed in his duty of care and recommended his dismissal. He resigned instead, as well did Margaret Carney and Vera Primson.

Of the other boys, Ryan could never forget Tomas’s plea at the hospital

“Ryan, I want you to promise me you’ll never, and I repeat never, tell anyone you’re a homo. I’m serious Ryan, don’t ever let anyone find out you’re a homo. Look what’s happened to me, my life is over, I’ll be castigated wherever I go. Promise me, as one blood brother to another, you’ll never admit being a fagott . . . promise me, please mate, promise me.”

It was the intense raw pain in that statement which Ryan would remember all his life. Along with many others, he cried at Tommo’s funeral which was attended by the whole school. Going back and trying to get back to normal was very hard but he had no choice. Back at Grammar, kids would try and comfort him because to them a kid their age who kills himself was traumatic even if they didn’t know him. Even with all the kind overtures, Ryan walked around in a trance.

It was as if he was looking down into a deep bottomless well. He found it hard to focus on even the most trivial things. Whilst trying to be absorbed in what the lecturer was teaching, Tommo’s final entreaty kept surfacing. It was the never, never that he remembered. One morning in class he could feel his emotions spinning out of control and he hurriedly excused himself saying he needed an urgent toilet visit. He was on the verge of nausea and bawling his heart out.

Racing down to the ablutions block he found an empty cubicle and, closing the door without locking, just let himself go. Crying and sobbing uncontrollably, he didn’t hear the soft footsteps of someone else entering the toilets. That is until the door opened slowly, and Jim Tandara stood before him looking worried.

“Ryan, Ryan please look at me, I don’t care if you’re crying, in fact I’ve been waiting for you to crack. I know how close you were to your friend. His dying has been a shock to you as well as being such a complete loss. Who knows how we might’ve reacted in the same circumstances? (Pausing) I take it this is the first time you’ve had a good cry then? (Ryan nodded) Ok, then let it all out. When you told me what the mongrel’s[1] did to him I couldn’t believe anyone could be so cruel. It’s scary. But I’m here for you mate; come here and let me hug you so you can let yourself go. C’mon cry Ryan, cry and let it all out.”

So Ryan stood up in that confined space and let Jim embrace him. This was the first time they’d been so close and to Ryan, it was wonderful. He melded into the other boy’s body, chest against chest, pelvis against pelvis and legs intertwined. Ryan’s sobs began to diminish as the magic of their embrace consumed him. Strong adolescent arms crushed each other, revelling in just holding each other’s body closely for the first time.

Then Ryan realised something wonderful was happening. The aroma, the touch, the fierceness of their embrace triggered another primal passion.

Slowly, heads that lay on opposite shoulders, began to move tentatively around so that they ultimately faced each other. In a flash lips crushed against lips as desire replaced all other emotions. A surge of pleasure, of need, consumed them and as one kiss ended another began. They kissed passionately for about five minutes before pulling slightly apart and looking wondrously into each other’s eyes. Jim was the first to recover a voice.

“Oh hell Ryan, I’ve wanted to do that for so long now. When we kissed I felt something I’d not enjoyed since I was a little kid – happiness. I can’t let you go man, I’ve never felt like this with anyone before. I’m yours, Ryan, completely yours.”

“Oh god yes. I’ve been dreaming about doing this with you; longing, painful longing. I started to believe we could never do this, and now, I don’t want to let go. In all the darkness of late, you’ve given me a glimpse of . . .”

Jim stopped Ryan by crushing their lips together again passionately. By now their cocks had become rock hard and the friction became a form of masturbation. Simply surrendering to nature they ground against each other completely ignoring the oncoming orgasms until it was too late. The sweetness of their embrace had morphed into a consuming lust. Nipples became hard and juice began to leak from demanding cocks; all this was ignored in the joy of being together.

They continued to rub against each other, but having been sexually repressed for so long, very little effort was required to achieve orgasm. Their climax came suddenly and before they could suppress it, they began to shudder violently. Totally surprised, their eyes locked and groans escaped as a massive orgasm consumed them. The huge discharge spilled over into their underwear. As their dual climax began to subside, they both became aware of their soiled underwear. Jim was the first to recover.

“(Alarmed) Oh gawd Ryan I’ve cum in my pants. I’m a mess.”

Then Ryan became aware that he too had soiled himself and hurriedly stepped back.

“(Laughing) Oh shit me too. I think a bucket of cum just painted me undies. Quickly let’s get our underwear off before the stain seeps through to our pants.”

They couldn’t stop giggling as they stripped down and removed their soiled underwear. Both pairs were heavy with discharge, but thankfully their school pants weren’t affected. Ryan was about to put his undies in a pocket when Jim asked,

“Hey, I hope you don’t think I’m a freak or a pervert but how about we exchange our undies. That way I’ll always have a part of you to remember. Am I being weird?”

“Weird? No, it’s a great idea, because as you say there’ll always be something to remember us by. That’s the problem with Tommo; whilst I’ve got memories, I’ve not got anything physical to keep his memory alive. Here, take mine and you give me yours.”

And so with a genuine feeling of happiness, they returned to school lessons knowing that something wonderful had happened.