I've Always Loved You - 19. New Year's Eve Part 4

I am mean. I know it. I dangle a carrot in front of your nose, but make you wait. That's just evil. One week. Then that show happens. I did have to name a name. I don't like it, but...I mention Ryan Seacrest. He does it every year, but I never say what year. If he doesn't like it, he can talk to me. Now, I had to write about a great show! I'll do that after my return from 1893 in Copenhagen. I love you, Daniel. I love my readers. updates are a part of this life. (Sigh) Try to enjoy the movie.  

New Year's Eve

Part Four

In spite of the not having the sweet ice tea, Carmine’s was nice! Heather’s ex-cousin-in-law didn’t just stash us away and forget about us. Again, this was a busy time for the city. Did we deserve special treatment? Some thought yes. We were people who did things so well, we brought attention to ourselves. That was partially true. Heather, Tom and I told stories. We did it so well, that people wanted to hear more. I did it to music and actions that people liked to see telling a story my way. Tom and Heather told stories that were done playing parts and did it so convincingly. We distracted their attention from life around them for a while. Lonzo was an artist, too. A meal is a means to an end. We stayed alive by eating more that simply ending hunger. It was done at Carmine’s that made you want to do it again! Two additional people Lonzo had working with him made thing even better! They offered things we might like and we told them what that was.

Chet was having a great time learning Italian meals were more than spaghetti and meatballs. He had to try a little of everything. We had the Garlic Bread, Stuffed Mushrooms, Fried Calamari, beef, chicken and shrimp. When Chet took a little of mine, I was chewing and didn’t have a lot of time. “That’s very spicy! It’s hot” I warned, but he’d also started to chew and his eyes widened. His mouth opened as he sucked cool air in and even fanned his hand at his mouth to lessen what he felt. He was about to commit what I considered a crime by drinking his tea! “What has your father and I told you about Tex-Mex?” I asked quickly picking up the basket of Garlic Bread and held it to him. Chet grabbed a toasted piece of buttery bread with green flecks or onion and chewed quickly.

“What is that, PopE!?” Chet gasped as the overwhelming sting lessened.

“Shrimp Fra Diavolo,” I answered with a grin. “The Devil’s Shrimp.”

Chet looked at Mark, “You should try this!”

Mark frowned, “This is payback for me moving in with you tonight, isn’t it?” He asked. “You’re trying to kill me!”

Chet grinned, “Nah, you’re too old.”

“Excuse me!?” Mark sat back.

“I learned in Health Class that kids have more nerves than adults do,” Chet shrugged and again he knew what he was doing with Uncle Mark. “That why little kids hold the blanket to their face for comfort. They can smell better and smell their Mom and previous meals. Babies can taste better than anyone and have tastebuds even on the roof of their mouths. We lose them as we age.” He waved at Mark. “You are too old for this to affect you.”

Mark was going right along with it. It was in fun. Mark’s eyes were so wide in shock and then narrowed, “Why you little…red headed…”

“Uncle Mark,” Mike said in a sing-song manner as he quietly said.

Mark glared at Chet and leaned in only inches from Chet’s face, “I hope I do snore and keep you up all night.” He looked smug, “Maybe I’ll do it on purpose just to keep you up!!”

Chet wasn’t worried at all. He looked at Tom and Heather, “You need to come to Texas! There’s the Cattlemen’s Steakhouse in the Fort Worth Stockyards…They have great steaks, but they have the Shoot ‘em Up Onion Bullets, Wrangler Calamari and sauces to make what is hot and spicy even hotter and spicier!” he pointed at my plate, “but that has in all on one plate!!” He looked at Mike and me, “but it’s different, but just as hot. Why?”

“I don’t know, son,” Mike smiled. “I know peppers are involved.”

I nodded, “There are so many kinds of peppers,” I added. “And what is used. The seeds in a pepper is the hottest part. Some chefs will just use a pepper having removed the seeds.” I smiled a bit evil, “Others will allow some to cooked with the dish. Some will even crush the seeds into a liquid and make the dish very hot.”

“And!” Mike smiled. “It changes color as the pepper matures on the vine! The color will also tell you how hot it will be!” He sat back and smiled, “In fact, I think that would be an excellent assignment for you!”

“What?” Chet asked.

“For extra credit or something,” Mike grinned. “Do a research project that tells how a pepper can become hot. What makes it hot? What are the kinds of peppers? You can do it in Los Angeles. Prepare a report telling what happens.”

Chet didn’t look worried. He was intrigued! “I can’t taste it all by myself.”

I looked at Mike, “It’s a duty of a parent to help their child with their homework or school projects,” I said taking Mike’s hand. “Are you willing to help?”

Mike chuckled, “It’s a sacrifice I’d be willing to make.” He looked at Mark, “Are you willing?”

Mark looked at us each, “First, I’m not his parent. Second, anything over two alarm is too much for me…if it’s Chili, Taco or…” he pointed at my plate, “that!”

“You may not be,” I did finger quotes, “a parent.” I smiled. “You are parental and can mentor as his uncle.”

“You are all trying to kill me,” Mark said looking at Tom and Heather. “You two are witnesses. They are encouraging me to do something, knowing I might die!”

It was funny! Laughter came from everyone at the table.

“Stop being a Drama Queen!” Mike said.

“It could be fun!” I added, “And delicious!”

Chet was liking this assignment!

In just two visits, Tom and Heather moved from strangers we knew of, to friends! Mark had changed! I tried to reach the part of him he was showing now. That was all Chet!! He didn’t even know he was doing it. Who wouldn’t want the love, devotion and faith of a child? Don’t tell Chet I said that. He would not like me referring to him as a child. He was a big boy now. Sure. He was at an age where the baby becomes a child and was using a code of behaviors he thought were important. He was becoming more independent. Mark was a good man. Now that the pressure was off about winning me back or looking for his next conquest sexually he was fun! I knew the problem with him finding anyone would be mine. Yeah, that was kind of sick, huh? I was protective! The former marine, turned lawyer was emotionally a virgin! No one…I mean NO ONE was going to abuse him or break his heart. No one. Who was I? What made me think I had that responsibility? What right? Because I was the only person that could claim to be his family! There was no one else. I was no expert. I had no Psychology Degree, but I gave a damn! I loved Mark! I’ve admitted it! I still am! I said that, too. That love changed and he cheated on me, I never cheated on him. However, I also know if Mike had come back with Mark and I were together…I would have. With Mike and Chet…even with Della, we were all his family. I don’t want to be too free with that word, but when everyone rejects you including the man and woman who gave birth to you. Emotional connections with others is natural and necessary. Protection is what family members do.

If you’ve ever watched a show broadcast live and you wonder how they pull things together and make it seem flawless. I’ll let you in on a secret. It is hard work! The cameras have to be ready, meaning the camera person has to be in place and ready when the time comes. The manager had to be listening to make sure the lights were on and equipment ready. The many, many police had to be ready to deal with…whatever the problem was. Everything from pickpockets to drunken partiers that get out of control. Emergency Medical also had to be ready to respond quickly. Candid shots of the crowds of people had to be coordinated. Everyone had a cue. I just was going to be ready. There were several cameras on one group or person. My concentration was going to be on the crowd before us. I had someone to give me a hand signal and go. Like it was at Disneyworld, I worked. Again, my family and friends were having to do whatever without me. This was why we were here, so I could do this.

I got through with what needed to be done. Returning to the suite, I was by myself. Following the death of my parents, I was by myself. I came from Charleston to Fort Worth by myself. I felt by myself in the world after I realized I was gay. Being by myself was okay with me, because I was never alone. I knew being by myself wasn’t permanent. I sat in the living area and turned the television on. At home I had programs that I liked digitally recorded and stream the program when I was done with a concert or tour. On a local twenty-four-hour news channel they spoke of what was happening here, in Time Square. And there were the reminders to local New Yorkers and those coming to New York of the alternate routes and blockages. When some streets would be shut down when. The people that lived in Manhattan had dealt with it for a hundred years and were accustomed to it. Then I heard faint, muffled voices and a keycard inserted in the lock. The suite was well sound proofed, because when the door open…

“…not natural!” Mike declared to the others who were laughing. “It just isn’t!” He was followed by Mark who was carrying Chet piggyback. Heather and Tom came in. Mike looked up at me. “Hi, Babe!!” Mike greeted with a big smile. “I hoped we be back before you finished!”

I grinned as he came over and kissed me. It wasn’t a long passionate kiss, but it was more than a quick peck of greeting, “I haven’t been here long.”

Chet slid off Mark’s back and raced over to hug me, “Hi, PopE!” The excitement of whatever they’d done was in his eyes. “We went ice skating!!”

“Which isn’t natural!” Mike pointed at the others, “How many ice skaters are from Cuba?” He waved his hands in exasperation. “How many even from Florida? There is not a lot of ice!”

Now, I knew what he was saying when he came in. I nodded, “Oh, I see.”

“Didn’t you have ice rinks?” Chet asked.

“Maybe,” Mike said grudgingly. “I don’t know. This Cuban was too busy making money for food!”

Mark was putting the coats in the closet and he grinned, “Rinks of ice are really new in a lot of areas.” He looked at Tom and Hearth, “How about some hot chocolate?”

“That would be marvelous!” Heather stated.

“Do they have any for Mike to sit in?” Tom asked pointing at Mike.

Mike grudged a nod, “I spent a lot of time sitting on my butt on the ice.” He reached back and rubbed his backside.

“Oh, you poor guy!” I said with amusement and sincere sympathy. “Do you need a heating pad?”

“Nah,” Mike grinned he hugged me. “The hot chocolate should work fine.”

The modern hotel had a way to get coffee and hot chocolate yourself! The suite had one of those machine/thing you take one of those pod things and put your mug under to catch the flow. This one used water and milk! The milk or cream was in the little refrigerator. It had to be done one at a time, but… Mark made the first and gave it to Heather. Ladies first! Everyone knew that rule. I hadn’t been skating, so I took mine last.

Mike nor I had to worry about getting Chet to bed. He did that on his own. Anytime he ever asked to stay up for some reason we agreed. We knew he wouldn’t make it. Mike told me Chet would always say he felt it in his legs. Huh? He told us one evening and I had to know.

“What do you feel in your legs?” I asked kindly. “Is it pain?” It could have been serious.

“No,” Chet would say very sleepy. “It’s…” he thought, “like the muscles are heavier. It doesn’t hurt, but they just tell me it’s time for bed.” He shrugged. “There isn’t even an ache. The muscles just feel like they’re hanging on the bone.” He reached down and touched a calf muscle, “Here,” he ran his hands over his thighs and mostly in the back, “and here.”

Mike had been worried a little, but Sherry had him to several doctors. That I agreed with Sherry. She was his mother! Maybe, it was a little extreme, but it was better to be safe than sorry. Finally a doctor told her, “I see nothing wrong with him. He’s very in tune with his body and he’s just tired.”

Neither Mike or I were surprised when Chet got up and said, “My legs are telling me to go to bed. I’m going.” He said with the little energy he could muster. He came to his father and pressed his forehead against Mike’s. “I had a great time, Dad.” He did the same for me, “I know you’ll be awesome tomorrow, PopE.” Then he did it to Mark, “Good-night, Uncle Mark.” He waved at Tom and Heather. “Good-night.” We watched him go in the bedroom and closed the door.

“That is an amazing kid!” Tom said to us.

“I agree with you,” I smiled.

“He’s weathered a lot,” Mark nodded.

“It’s a long story,” Mike fidgeted uncomfortably. “Losing his mother and the struggle with his grandparents who think we’ll make him gay…” He looked with pain in his eyes at the closed door to the room where Chet was to sleep.

“How are you doing that!?” Heather asked in shock.

Tom put his hand on Heather’s arm, “Probably the same way they did with my Dad and drove him into a life of secrets and death. Ignorance.”

I also touched Mike’s arm, “I say he is being triumphant! He’s smart and he’s guided by you.”

“And you,” Mike smiled. He grinned at Mark. “And you.”,

“As we will get further acquainted,” I said to Tom and Heather. “I know you’ll know more. I have no doubt about that.”

Mark chuckled, “I give it another day or so. He’ll be calling you Uncle Thomas,” he pointed at Heather, “and Aunt Heather.”

I smiled at Mark, “I think you need one of them yourself.”

“A child!?” Mark’s eyes widened and held his hands up to stop where I was going with this, “Oh, no! Thank you very much, but I like what I’ve got now!” He pointed with his thumb over his shoulder, “I’ve got a future lawyer growing in him. I’ll be the fun uncle and when he gets annoying send him home! To you!!” He smiled grandly.

I had a long day the next day. I didn’t stay up much longer.

There also was a point where even doing what you love to do becomes a chore. You prepare too much. That was like my getting myself too excited would make me nervous. Rehearsing too much was the same as studying too much. It was a game in the mind. A subject you know; answers you knew you can make yourself doubt. I knew the songs I’d chosen. I wrote them! The bout with amnesia was just a part the performance process. It would happen, but when it was time to come in…I knew I would make my cue.

Sleeping in was not a good plan. The body is programmed when to go to sleep and when to wake up. It can be adjusted, but that doesn’t happen doing it once. Adjusting from Central Time, to Eastern Standard Time and then to Pacific Time…all in one week!? My brain would throw in the towel and give up.

In the bedroom Mike and I shared, Mike watched me get things ready.

“I know you no doubt have it under control, but…” he shrugged as he sat on the side of the bed.

“But?” I grinned at him.

“You know what they say the temperature will be tonight,” he stated and not a question.

I turned back to a leather garment bag. “I do,” I nodded. “It will be in the low thirties to upper twenties.”

“And you’re wearing something warm,” Mike said as a statement again.

“Certainly,” I unzipped the leather bag. “I think this will keep me warm and yet stylish.” I pulled the tuxedo I had chosen out. “It is insolated yet has the needed flash!”

Mike’s expression became one of wonder as he slowly got up and walked over, “Is that…” he touched a sleeve, “a leather tuxedo?”

“Yes,” I answered.

The first thing you noticed was the red. The upper portion of the coat was that color. And the red sparkled in the light. The best description was your head was a rocket or a comet. The sparkle were the sequences and red crystals that covered the shoulders. As your eye followed the red down, the space between the sparkles and red were spaced farther apart replaced by black. Like an exhaust trail left from your head. As it went, just at the mid-level of your torso the black became all you saw. The pants were also black. The purpose was to make people look at you. I usually used costumes in my shows. The night Mike proposed in Las Vegas I wore a nice black tuxedo, but there were no flourishes about that tux. This tuxedo should capture your eyes live in front of you or at home on the sofa while watching. Yes, there is probably a diagnoses for someone who wants to be the center of attention. I know there is. That’s what being a showman requires!

“It is lined on the inside to keep me warm,” I explained. “It could be breezy, but the leather will protect me.” Like a motorcycle jacket that blocked wind as you rode. I picked up the remote I used to let the computer know what I needed to do. “I will need to keep my hand warm.” I chuckled, “At least my thumb, anyway.” I held my right hand up and moved my thumb toward the center of my hand. “It’s great we have these opposable thumbs.”

Mike grinned, “Millions of evolution just so you can give a concert.”

I shook my head, “Your seeing it wrong.” I said kissing him. “I can give a concert because of millions of years of evolution. The millions of years isn’t just so I can.”

Mike smiled, “Is there a difference?”

“Yes!”

I got a call, Ryan told me the “dress” rehearsal was pointless. That had to be tough on him. He was such a perfectionist. The need to control everything was right on the surface. I saw him surrender a few times when one of the staff didn’t do what he envisioned! “No! Not there!” I heard him and saw him say to one of the camera crew, “You’ll be in the wrong place. Don’t stand there, stand over here.” No one could argue with him. He made a Hell of a lot of money doing what he did. He knew what he was doing.

Tom, Heather, Mark, Mike and Chet ventured out of the suite. As everyone was told…and I mean all those who watched the news, they knew what would happen and when. Below, the number of people increased. The number of vehicles on the street decreased. The stage area on the sidewalk in front of the hotel was going up. That stage would spill over into the street. At six in the evening, all cars and vehicles were gone. There were police cars and a couple of ambulance parked, but that was it. More people were beginning gather in the Square. Sidewalks were not the only thing traveled on foot now. Many were walking in the streets freely now. I got ready to go down to be there by nine that evening.

The door to the suite opened again. I saw several McCafé drinks held and Chet was happily consuming his Oreo McFlurry.

Tom looked at me and realized, “We didn’t get Eric anything.”

Chet bounced, “Nah, PopE won’t eat or drink before he goes on stage except for maybe water.”

I grinned, “That’s right. I can’t afford to burp while singing.”

“Oh,” Tom nodded. “I get it.”

I had on the pants and shirt. There was no tie. The shirt was smooth, not one of those with the fluffy or frilly front. It buttoned at the neck and only a small sliver of the shirt would be seen. The jacket covered everything else.

Mike smiled, but the smile was also a slight leer, “Can you show them the coat?”

I grinned back, “Sure.” I nodded. “With the thermal underwear on, I can only wear it a few minutes.” I went and got the jacket and pulled it on. In the light of the suite, the sparkles just shimmered with sparkling red.

Chet even stopped eating his McFlurry as his eyes widened, “Wow.” He said almost in a whisper.

Mark grinned, “You said it, Kiddo.” He waved at me. “Now that…is a star!” He said proudly.

I came down as I saw Ryan where he said we were to gather. He wasn’t pacing, but his face and stance spoke of a ritual he did before any broadcast. He looked up and saw me and a big smile spread over his face as he saw my outfit.

“You’re ready,” Ryan smiled.

“I am,” I nodded. I pointed at him. “I didn’t want to interrupt you getting prepared mentally.”

Ryan physically waved that off, “It’s something I do.” He shrugged.

“You always make it look effortless,” I smiled.

“So do you,” Ryan said. “An artist will make a person believe anyone can do it. That takes a bit of centering of the mind.”

“That makes you an artist,” I smiled.

There was a monitor that showed the broadcast.

“Three, two, one and now.” A woman pointed to someone at the control panel. There were pre-recorded parts.

There were panning shots of the crowd that were here all waving and cheering as the camera came across them, “Live, in New York City’s Time Square. It’s Dick Clark’s Rocking Eve with your host Ryan Seacrest,” Ryan stood with his microphone in hand talking to the camera, “and special guests…” now the different guests singers and groups were shone singing their hearts out as each was introduced, including me. The image of me was when I was in Las Vegas dressed in a tuxedo as I sang Mine At Last. I had mixed emotions about that because that’s the night Mike proposed and got shot the next day. From extremely happy to an extremely tragic event. “And now, your host. Ryan Seacrest!”