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Having fun crushing on a supposed straight guy.


Kev de Cauchery

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Gosh, I'm such a slut!

 

So yeah, I'm having this crush on this guy I know about from a class. I said "know about" because I've never actually talked to him or anything besides a certain amount of class particpation on both sides. So I basically know nothing about this Justin. Well, yeah, I know his name is Justin, and he's from the States. And cute to my eyes.

 

O well, Sky and Graham comes to mind when I'm talking about this situation. Sky, well, another sad news.

 

So yeah, I'm pretty convinced that he's straight, tho I don't have any evidence, but then, there's never a need for evidence when you think someone's straight.

 

However, this is where the fun part comes in, the three girls I'm been sitting with told me that Justin gives "special" attention to me when I do the group discussion/presentation kind of stuff.

 

But then I'm still convinced he's still straight. For me, Justin's just a pretty person i get to see once each week. and I'm kinda satisfied with that.

 

But then sometimes I think maybe I'm over-shielding myself from this self-protection thingie. And this self-loathe/insecurity thingie.

 

Anyways, I smile everytime I think of him, and the faux-possibility that he'd be gay.

 

And I never remember having fun crushing on "straight" guys. Maybe I'm having fun this time because I know I wouldn't let myself SinK into this desperation state.

 

Anyways, life's kinda good, 'cept it's so expensive to live in Syd, Aus.

 

On writing front, I just finished a short story 'Just Somebody' for the creative writing fiction workshop I'm taking. It's a letter style kind of thingie. It's from K to M, the same two characters in my 'Yours Truly, Marionette' I've posted here. (Yay for the shameless plug.) I'm thinking of posting the new one here soon, after editing or whatnot.

 

Oh yeah, i'm single and fabulous. I don't think I'm sad or depressed anymore.

 

(O well, I've attached the story I'm talking about. Won't post it till my prof read it, of course.) Error with attaching files. :/

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I fail to see how crushing on someone, gay-looking or straight-looking, makes you a slut. Just accept your crush and surf on the feelings it provides until you know more about him. Besides, you are fabulous, why would Justin not give you special attention? :)

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