Jump to content
  • entries
    23
  • comments
    119
  • views
    8,465

Social Anxiety And Crying Wolf


Cynus

810 views

I have some significant issues. I think most people have one or two, but are able to keep them in check. Over the past few months it hasn’t been as easy for me to do the same with my issues. They keep sneaking up on me at inopportune times and trying to take me down. Every once in a while, they succeed.
I wouldn’t be surprised if people thought I was nothing more than a spoiled child seeking attention. Every now and then my social anxiety gets the better of me, and I overreact, and I start threatening to leave whatever social scenario I’m involved in. Regardless of what may be thought of me, I don’t do these things in my right mind. I don’t claim I’m going to leave and then stick around because I want to be known as the ‘boy who cried wolf’. I do them because I start to freak out because the stress gets to me, and then before I know it I’ve said something that simply isn’t true.
The reality is that I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to quit writing, or leave GA, or even reduce the time I spend in the wonderful online communities I’ve become a part of. Sometimes the depression becomes almost unbearable, and it makes me want to run away from everything, but in the end I choose to stay. Why?
Because these communities I’ve become a part of are what is keeping me alive. Being able to interact with you, the vast ocean of people who understand what it means to struggle against oppression in everyday life, is what keeps me going. Knowing that there are people out there who actually care if I live or die is a wonderful thing. Knowing that I actually make some sort of difference here . . . I couldn’t really ask for anything else.
If you see me post something like “I won’t be around for a while” or “You may not see very much of me”, just know that it’s coming from a place I don’t entirely control, and hope someday I’ll be able to move past. You don’t have to say anything; I get that it grows old very quickly. But, whether I’m a petulant child or not, I’m here to stay for as long as you’ll have me.
Thank you for reading. I plan to do update my blog from time to time, and hopefully with less annoying subjects.

 

Peace,

 

Cynus

  • Like 9

10 Comments


Recommended Comments

  • Site Administrator

Yes, vent away, Cynus.  I understand completely how debilitating anxiety and depression can be.  I wish I could take it all away, but we know it's not that simple.  :hug: my friend.  I hope you feel better soon. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment

I think you are gaining some insight and making some progress in recognizing this about yourself.  You have my support and I encourage you to keep on writing and keep on keeping on!  DDK

  • Like 1
Link to comment

I think you are right when you say most people have issues. Your mistake is assuming yours are worse or more terrible than others, or that you are not as good at handling them. Don't do that to yourself. You are tackling yours in a proactive way, and that tells me you will get better at taking control of them. Never be afraid to ask for help. Things that are all consuming in their importance today, may be insignificant a year or two from now. You are your own best judge, so if you ever feel you need professional help, make a phone call. There is no weakness in that... only strength. Sometimes, we can't handle big stuff on our own. As the others have said, we are here anytime you need us... cheers, Cynus... Gary

  • Like 4
Link to comment

Hey Cynus,

 

I'm sorry you're going through so much. I'm pretty sure I had social anxiety when I was growing up, but fortunately, I had (have) a best friend who was so outgoing, she dragged me everywhere. Of course back then I was just 'shy'. Now my son has the same thing. Except he doesn't have a best friend who will drag him out of the house.

 

Social anxiety and depression are very debilitating, as Val said. I also think talking to someone might help tremendously, as Gary mentioned. The therapist might even prescribe some meds to help you. Don't be ashamed to take meds if you need them; they do help considerably. :)

 

We're here for you, Cynus, should you need us.

 

Good luck. =)

  • Like 3
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Our Privacy Policy can be found here: Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue..