You meet someone and you're awestruck by them. Here's how I think it can go- the first is that you meet the person, and you think they "hang the moon", to use one of Adam's phrases. You're blinded to their faults in that initial rush of attraction, but as you get to know them, you realize that something's off, and they're not as perfect for you as you thought they were. It could turn out they're downright horrible people with an initial charm (aka Neal in ISWB), or it could just turn out they are just not-so-good guys who's faults outweigh their positives, and thus aren't good for you, aka Kevin for John in Frat Memoirs. The second way it can go is that you meet the person, you like them alot, and you get on really good with each other. The initial attraction works well- and you find many good qualities about the person that keeps you into it. But then that spark fades- and you realize you've made a really good friend, but not a lover, aka Bryan in It Started with Brian. Then the third one- everything aligns right...you click with that person on a deep level, and you're aware of their faults but love them anyway- and you feel a passion for them...then that is the sort of real, deep love that can happen from an intitial infatuated attraction, aka Alex and Zach. There's this tv sitcom, How I Met Your Mother, that details the courting game that we all go through during our 20's(although now Ted's in his early 30's). There was this great episode where the protagonist realizes that he dated this one girl on a blind date seven years ago, and they spend the night recreating their past date to figure out why they didn't work out. They have a lot of fun, and think, "Wow, we should've just gotten together then...would have saved us all this dating." But then they realize that while they like each other a lot- it just wouldn't have worked...because she's a cat lover who loves to talk about her cats, and he's a resturant snob who loves to make fun of the menus. And it's those flaws they each admit to possessing- it's those flaws that they want their future partner in life not to just tolerate, but to actually...like. And find endearing.

That's something I want for myself. I want a guy who will actually like the random and crazy stuff that I always say- not just roll his eyes and go, "Oh, god, Jeremy's talking about the Eighties again!", but go, "Aww, Jeremy and his crazy fetish for the 80's. How cute." I want a guy who will like me the way I am, and not expect me to change or be "better" for him. To me, and what seemed to be the point of this episode- is that so many people in an effort to "hook" someone censor the less-desirable and somewhat annoying quirks they have wind up in relationships that are wrong for them, because their partner doesn't really know all of them because they hide part of themselves to look more attractive.

To be able to love someone- ALL of that someone, flaws and all- is an element of real love, and what separates it from initial infatuation. Because when you're infatuated, as Jack is saying, you're sorta blind to the flaws the other person possesses. But that infatuation can give way and grow into love when you get to know the person, get to know their qualities as well as their flaws...and basically be able to go, "So what? You're still my guy." But that will never happen if you just sit around and pine for the guy from afar, and have him on this pedestal.

I've had a lot of crushes in my life, and unfortunately, none of them have turned into a boyfriend for me. I remain hopeful, though. And I've made some good friends along the way as well. I feel like as I keep sight of what I want and need in a relationship...then...when it does happen, I'll be ready and won't screw it up.