Conner Posted June 30, 2007 Share Posted June 30, 2007 Furthermore... Unknown to both of them, there stood a very pleased angel behind them, God Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted June 30, 2007 Author Share Posted June 30, 2007 Furthermore...So, you're saying St. Peter out ranks an Archangel????? Oh my, that was juicy! I speak, of course, of the shower scene. Very well written! When you drop a bomb, you don't fool around! So all I have to hold on to here is that Ryan is favoured by God and will somehow intervene and fix Josh? Anyone takinf bets on how this one turns out? Conner Thanks for the comments, Conner. It took a helluva time and energy to write this chapter and i'm glad that you liked it. As for your doubt about the ranking of St. Peter... As far as my storyline is considered, God is like the Supreme Commander and St. Peter is the Prime Minister. Archangels are God's messenger. Archangel Gabriel, as written in Wiki, was God's right hand and messenger. Hence, he carried St. Peter's message to Jess (btw it wasn't St. Peter's message as St. Peter was also a mere messenger of God in this context). http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archangel_Gabriel As far as Gabriel reporting the events to St. Peter is concerned, I'd request you to look into chapter 1 (the first dialogue b/w God and St. Peter). You'll notice the tone of secrecy depicted in it. Link to comment
WesleyC Posted June 30, 2007 Share Posted June 30, 2007 I'm hooked! I'm still wiping tears off of my face though. The whole God and St. Peter interaction is very intrigueing and I can't wait to see where it leads. Thanks for sharing your story! ---------- WesleyC Dealing with Life Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted June 30, 2007 Author Share Posted June 30, 2007 I'm hooked! I'm still wiping tears off of my face though. The whole God and St. Peter interaction is very intrigueing and I can't wait to see where it leads. Thanks for sharing your story! ---------- WesleyC Dealing with Life BSK P.S. Chapter 4 is also up on Nifty at Alpha and Omega Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 4, 2007 Author Share Posted July 4, 2007 Chapter 5 is up and can be viewed at Alpha and Omega Ch. 5 The BeaStKid Link to comment
Conner Posted July 4, 2007 Share Posted July 4, 2007 No wonder earth is in such a mess, God's always doing paperwork! St. Peter's getting annoying. I am pleased that God is now off his holy butt and doing something. I've always thought that God should be more hands-on. I am confused as to how Ryan got from the hospital to his high school chemistry lab. Copper Sulfate is not a great way to go...extremely painful. Keep those chapters coming, dude! Conner Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted July 4, 2007 Share Posted July 4, 2007 I am confused as to how Ryan got from the hospital to his high school chemistry lab. Copper Sulfate is not a great way to go...extremely painful. I understood at last that the God/ Saint Peter couple isn't the main couple of the story, since in the little box at the beginning, it says Teens. "Oh, my Me!" This cracked me up. Basic, but effective. Aren't you mistaking Ryan for Josh, Conner? Now, the serious business is going to start, as God is visiting Ryan. My only criticism is that the chapters are a bit short. Or they should come in more often... Link to comment
Conner Posted July 4, 2007 Share Posted July 4, 2007 ... Aren't you mistaking Ryan for Josh, Conner? No. I don't think so. I know Josh is in a coma. In the second scene of that chapter, isn't Jessica visiting Ryan in his hospital room? Like I said, I'm confused. Conner Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 4, 2007 Author Share Posted July 4, 2007 No. I don't think so. I know Josh is in a coma. In the second scene of that chapter, isn't Jessica visiting Ryan in his hospital room? Like I said, I'm confused. Conner Jessica visited Ryan in his room...107/3...You are not allowed to lock your hospital room and Ryan locked it in chapter 4. I guess he forgot to lock it while he went to sleep thinking after Jess left... Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 4, 2007 Author Share Posted July 4, 2007 I am confused as to how Ryan got from the hospital to his high school chemistry lab. Copper Sulfate is not a great way to go...extremely painful. Conner My reply to that would be that Ryan has become numb with all the developments these past six months and is hell-bent (no pun intended) on doing himself away... The BeaStKid P.S thanks for the comments, Conner and Bondwriter Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted July 5, 2007 Share Posted July 5, 2007 No. I don't think so. I know Josh is in a coma. In the second scene of that chapter, isn't Jessica visiting Ryan in his hospital room? This news was the last straw for Ryan and he made his way towards the chemistry lab after school the next day. He had taken permission from the teacher to remain behind to practice a few experiments. And 107/3 is in the school, not in the hospital, am I right? Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 5, 2007 Author Share Posted July 5, 2007 And 107/3 is in the school, not in the hospital, am I right? Dorm 107...room number 3...Yep it's in the school's campus inside the hostel Link to comment
Conner Posted July 6, 2007 Share Posted July 6, 2007 Ok, already! I get it, now! I did say I was confused, didn't I? :wacko: Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 6, 2007 Author Share Posted July 6, 2007 glad to clear that up for you... :pickaxe: Link to comment
Centaur Posted July 7, 2007 Share Posted July 7, 2007 Hi BeaStKid: I'm going to jump in here and comment, having read all five chapters of Alpha and Omega this morning. Great job! I really like the story! I think Ryan and Josh are great characters, and you've done a nice job weaving the story together. I agree with others - the God/St. Peter interactions are fun. And yes - to answer the question above - St. Peter DEFINITELY outranks Archangels. He holds the Keys to Heaven, and was the rock upon which Jesus built his church. That gives him the corner office on the top floor guys. I'm worried though. Chapter 5 had a "The End?" at the bottom. PLEASE don't tell me you're stopping there! There is TOO much unknown dude! What happens to Josh? Does he just shrivel away and die? And who is appearing to Ryan in the park? Gabriel? And how do the flashbacks come in? Inquiring minds want to know! I'm hooked now dammit! LOL - I would like MORE MORE MORE! Thanks for a great story BeaStKid. Please keep it going. Centaur P.S. And yes - nice job on the sex scene in the shower. It wasn't overdone - simple, but yet appropriate. Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 7, 2007 Author Share Posted July 7, 2007 Hi BeaStKid: I'm going to jump in here and comment, having read all five chapters of Alpha and Omega this morning. Great job! I really like the story! I think Ryan and Josh are great characters, and you've done a nice job weaving the story together. I agree with others - the God/St. Peter interactions are fun. And yes - to answer the question above - St. Peter DEFINITELY outranks Archangels. He holds the Keys to Heaven, and was the rock upon which Jesus built his church. That gives him the corner office on the top floor guys. I'm worried though. Chapter 5 had a "The End?" at the bottom. PLEASE don't tell me you're stopping there! There is TOO much unknown dude! What happens to Josh? Does he just shrivel away and die? And who is appearing to Ryan in the park? Gabriel? And how do the flashbacks come in? Inquiring minds want to know! I'm hooked now dammit! LOL - I would like MORE MORE MORE! Thanks for a great story BeaStKid. Please keep it going. Centaur P.S. And yes - nice job on the sex scene in the shower. It wasn't overdone - simple, but yet appropriate. Thanks for your wonderful comments, Centaur. I really appreciate it, being a novice in writing. It really boosts your morale to hear such comments. As for your concerns about the story continuing? I checked with some of the other stories I'm following on E-Fic (incomplete ones) and it seems that the comment The End, Maybe is automatically generated for the last chapter. And, no. I will surely be continuing the story. As a reader I hate it when authors abandon their stories for whatever reasons. I try and write my stories with a reader's heart, 'cause that's what I am! A reader first, then an author. So, I'm not going to abandon my readers.. Thanks once again The BeaStKid Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 21, 2007 Author Share Posted July 21, 2007 Chapter 6 is up fellas.... Thanks to my editors TalonRider and BondWriter for making it possible and comprehensible. The BeaStKid Link to comment
RJ Santos Posted July 21, 2007 Share Posted July 21, 2007 Great chapter! I think everyone is going to enjoy the conversation between God and Ryan. It was funny in a way. And also serious in another. Imagine the balance of the world depending on your sanity. LOL. Tough job for Ryan there. Keep going, my friend! Link to comment
Site Moderator TalonRider Posted July 21, 2007 Site Moderator Share Posted July 21, 2007 I was glad to see that Ryan didn't heal Josh completely. That tends to make it more believable that way. And the conversation with God is good. Serious when it needed to be, with humor thrown in. Jan Link to comment
Conner Posted July 22, 2007 Share Posted July 22, 2007 I was glad to see that Ryan didn't heal Josh completely. That tends to make it more believable that way. And the conversation with God is good. Serious when it needed to be, with humor thrown in. Jan The story stepped into fantasy this chapter. It only hinted at divine intervention up to now. It's here in loving colour. Ryan is a deity. Essentially, he's the second coming. That's how I see it. He's here to resolve the chaos in the world. Or am I reading a different story? I wonder if JC is going to be pissed? I'm not clear on exactly what health issues Josh still has. Had I been Ryan, I would have cured Josh completely. People would just think it a miracle. Except for the Catholic church, that is. They don't acknowledge miracles they can't take the credit for. The ending of that chapter implied troubled times for Ryan. We'll see. Conner Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted July 22, 2007 Share Posted July 22, 2007 I think the story is really kicking into a higher gear, with Ryan now belonging to a pantheon. The mix of humor and philosophical matters, and still this feel good episode with the homecoming party are what makes this story highly intelligent and entertaining. I'm looking forward to finding out what's next. (I hope the sandman is indeed benevolent, since falling into his clutches at the very end of the story looks like some evil cliff-hanger! ) Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 22, 2007 Author Share Posted July 22, 2007 Great chapter! I think everyone is going to enjoy the conversation between God and Ryan. It was funny in a way. And also serious in another. Imagine the balance of the world depending on your sanity. LOL. Tough job for Ryan there. Keep going, my friend! Yeah, responsibilities such as these can be overbearing. You can make or break the world with just a a thought....lol...Thanks for the comments. I was glad to see that Ryan didn't heal Josh completely. That tends to make it more believable that way. And the conversation with God is good. Serious when it needed to be, with humor thrown in. Jan Precisely for that reason Ryan didn't heal Josh completely. You have to bear in mind---He is the sanest of them all!!! and announcing to the world what he truly is, is not a very sensible thing to do...lol...The conversation with God was what took me the longest to write....Very difficult indeed...How do you tell a person that you are a God??? lol.... Thanks for the comments, Jan... The story stepped into fantasy this chapter. It only hinted at divine intervention up to now. It's here in loving colour. Ryan is a deity. Essentially, he's the second coming. That's how I see it. He's here to resolve the chaos in the world. Or am I reading a different story? I wonder if JC is going to be pissed? I'm not clear on exactly what health issues Josh still has. Had I been Ryan, I would have cured Josh completely. People would just think it a miracle. Except for the Catholic church, that is. They don't acknowledge miracles they can't take the credit for. The ending of that chapter implied troubled times for Ryan. We'll see. Conner Yup...we all have to wait and see...lol.. Josh is still a bit weak, physically, and although his brain and spine has been healed, the spine is still not strong enough to take the responsibilities of a normal life. Thanks for the comments. I think the story is really kicking into a higher gear, with Ryan now belonging to a pantheon. The mix of humor and philosophical matters, and still this feel good episode with the homecoming party are what makes this story highly intelligent and entertaining. I'm looking forward to finding out what's next. (I hope the sandman is indeed benevolent, since falling into his clutches at the very end of the story looks like some evil cliff-hanger! ) WOW!! Thanks a ton Francois. I'm flattered and honoured by your comments. Thanks a ton to you all for sticking with Josh and Ryan...Ther is more to come...stay tuned... The BeaStKid Link to comment
Ieshwar Posted July 23, 2007 Share Posted July 23, 2007 Hi BeaStKid, I have just read the story and it Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted July 23, 2007 Author Share Posted July 23, 2007 Hi BeaStKid, I have just read the story and it Link to comment
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