Comicality Posted February 13, 2009 Share Posted February 13, 2009 Just something for you guys to put your 2 cents in! Easy question....how old were you when you first realized you had feelings for other boys/girls? When you first realized that they were a bit more than 'friendly'. And now...looking at the kids today, and thinking back to your own experience at the same time....do you think that age is too young for kids to be thinking about sex? Afterall...when we remember how it was for us, and think about the difference in every generation...where would you place your own experience when side by side with the teenagers of today? Let us know your thoughts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeL Posted February 13, 2009 Share Posted February 13, 2009 I was 10 years old. I now think that was unusually young. I may have matured early, but not that early. I have shaved daily since I was 13, if that's any measure. My own sons all matured in their early teens. Kids will think about sex at whatever age it becomes of interest to them. That may be before the hormones kick in. Parents need to stay aware of a child's interests in hopes of having "the talk" at the right time. I suppose kids are developing an interest in sex earlier now. They are certainly being exposed to more of it in pop culture than I was at the same age. I can't really answer the last question. I'll keep an eye on my grandsons and get back to you later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
old bob Posted February 13, 2009 Share Posted February 13, 2009 Feelings for both ? I dont remember, perhaps about 12. First experiences with boys : 14, with girls 17. My children : Eldest son born 1952, straight. First experiences with girls 17, married the first time with the same girl 19. divorced and married 4 times ! Second son born 1956, straight, nothing (that I know !) till he met a girl when he was 28, lived with her 4 years and married her at 32. Daughter born 1958, living with a guy at the age of 16, changing guy each 6 months, probably bi, was married 3 times, got Aids (see my blogs) remained with her last husband till her death. Youngest son born 1964, first experiences with girls when he was 14, had several girlfriends during 4 years, wanted marry the last one, left her when she returned to Sydney (she was an Aussie), fell in love with a friend at 19, stayed with him 10 years, became an activist in GBLT circles, changed partner (one died) 3 times in the last 8 years, living happily with the last one since then. When I compare these experiences with the feelings of the new generations (my grandchildren, 3 boys and 3 girls aged from 12 to 32) , I dont see any change. Need to test, need of romance, need of sex, need of real love, everything is the same as we had 50 years ago. The only difference : young people today are more mature about the physical aspect of sex, but their feelings are as strong as we had. Just one point about the timing : sex comes first, love only later, if sex is good . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Verm Posted February 13, 2009 Share Posted February 13, 2009 I think it was early in my final year of primary school (12yo, I don't know the equivalent grade in US education system) when I first started having thoughts about boys or girls sexually. I remember sneaking in my friend's porn (VHS!!!) and had my first sexual encounter at 13 with another boy who bunked in the dorm next door (yay for all-boys boarding school!). I agree with MikeL, kids will think of sex at any age, and it'll probably happen faster if he/she has friends who have had experience. Peer pressure and all that stuff. I don't think it's wrong, but parents could try to prevent them having sex early, and just think about it until later on when they're a bit older. But in my culture, parents very rarely or don't give their kids "the talk" at all, so we're basically left to fend for ourselves. We were expected to stay chaste until marriage. Sucks, but hey, what they don't know wont hurt 'em Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KJames Posted February 14, 2009 Share Posted February 14, 2009 (edited) I knew for sure that I was gay when I was 10 years old, which upon thinking back, was just at the startup of puberty for me... :wacko: ... Edited February 14, 2009 by kjames Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J_Ross Posted February 14, 2009 Share Posted February 14, 2009 Twelve, or possibly Thirteen for first experience. Don't remember when I 'realized' it. When I think back to it, I don't feel like I was too young, or rather, I can't believe I was only twelve. And yes, I think twelve is too young. I have tiny siblings and I'd kill 'em if they were getting up to what I was at their age. Or not, but...ugh. I look at them and I honestly can't imagine myself having sex at that age. But I was... I am such a hypocrite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger Posted February 15, 2009 Share Posted February 15, 2009 Well, this will be a shocker, but the answer is 8. I know that's very young and definitely pre-pubescent, but I guess I'm just unusual. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comicality Posted February 18, 2009 Author Share Posted February 18, 2009 I'm really intrigued by the answers you guys gave! Honestly! For me, it was about the same. Around 10 or 11 years old when I first really started thinking about sex. In fact, there was a boy named Gabe in the 6th grade that I had SUCH strong sexual feelings for that I honestly remember having to ask myself if I was in 'love' with him? (I wasn't, of course. We barely hung out at all outside of school. But Imean I really had a FEVER for that boy! Hehehe!) The thing is, I was wondering about how it might be these days for kids. Because sex is a lot more 'obvious' in movies, TV, and music, than it was when I was that age. And there was no internet back then either. What children can find out and absorb about sex NOW had me wondering if maybe the age had dropped to 7 or 8. But maybe not. It seems the same. I remember being aware of sex, but didn't really 'seek' out a partner until about 11. (Lost my virginity to a boy at 13. And then his sister in the same year.) I try to be open minded about the whole thing, but when I look at 12 and 13 year old boys now, they seem like BABIES to me. It's like...wow....that's WAY too young. But when I think back to my own experiences...I can't really make a judgement on how young is too young in general. I guess it just depends from person to person. Hell, I'm thinking 13 year olds are young, and here I was thinking about sex at 11! I guess it's unrealistic to think that it 'can't happen' that young. Weirdness. By the way....did you see the tabloid thing about the 13 year old dad in the UK??? Hehehe, what the hell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Duchess Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 Honestly me i didnt start noticing i was into guys until i was 14 or 15. Like on a relationship level now i had fooled around with a guy before hand but i didnt think anything of it. But before then i honestly thought i was straight and then I found the boys locker room in high school after hours. Let's just say that was a turning point in my sexuality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeL Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 By the way....did you see the tabloid thing about the 13 year old dad in the UK??? Hehehe, what the hell? See Who is Alfie Patten? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LongGone Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 I dunno. I suspected when I was really young -- pre-pubescent. But I didn't really get it until later on. I just wasn't overly interested at first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hh5 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 hehe - I notice to like boys at 7. Not been lucky with a bf but had a lot of crushes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkfoxprime Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I know that in 4th grade - I was 9 or 10 - I was already having "naughty" thoughts about other boys, about being naked with them watching me and stuff, and not understanding at all the thrill I was getting out of it. Even as young as 7 or 8, my going-to-sleep make believe world would usually include me and my best friend at the time Brett getting married and living happily ever after. I never thought about my girl friends, only Brett, or occasionally another boy friend. (Even now, thinking back on it, it's hard for me to type "girl friend" without remembering the teasing I got about having girlfriends. Grade school boys are cruel!) It took me until 7th grade (12ish) to realize what it meant about the naughty thoughts about other boys (and the other actions that had started going along with them). I repressed it, though, and in high school even went so far as to start calling one of my friends my girlfriend, until she caught me at it and gave me a tongue-lashing I'll never forget. I didn't actually have sex, with anyone, until I met the guy who is now my husband, so I can't speak to that part of it. But yeah, I was definitely having the feelings, whether I admitted it or not, as far back as I have clear memories. - dfp Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts