"Between the Lines" by Comicality

[Agincourt]

This is a discussion about the story Between the Lines by Comicality.

 

As always, there may be spoilers below so please consider yourself warned if you continue reading before reading the story itself.

 

Eli, the first-person narrator of this story, is a college student, apparently in Chicago. As the story opens, he is having sex with his boyfriend Chris. "I never considered myself a bottom before I actually found my first boyfriend here in college," he writes, as Chris is drilling him on the bed in their dorm room. "But Chris...mmmm...Chris was everything that I imagined having an actual 'boyfriend' would be like. He was cute and sweet and sexual...I was lucky to hook up with him when I did."

 

Almost immediately, however, the reader -- though not Eli -- detects all kinds of warning bells about this relationship. It becomes obvious to the reader, though apparently not to Eli, that Chris is not such a great find. He is, in fact, pretty much a boor. Eli is evidently so infatuated with him, and, more so, infatuated with the notion of having a boyfriend, that he somehow papers over the fact that Chris is an inconsiderate slob who seemingly cares nothing about Eli's well-being and views him primarily as a convenient and submissive piece of ass.

 

I have to admit that when I first encountered this story, I had to stop reading it. Eli just seemed so masochistic. He made excuse after excuse for Chris in his narrative to the reader of the story. He professed not to mind when Chris ordered pizza with mushrooms, even though Chris knew that Eli hated mushrooms. And he rationalized the fact that Chris really didn't show him the kind of affection that a true boyfriend ought to show. Well before the first chapter was ended, any reader would be ready to slap Eli and tell him to come to his senses.

 

The story has a kind of "show within the show," as Eli is in the midst of writing a highly personal story -- gay romantic fiction. (At least we assume it is gay.) He is in a creative writing class, and in that class he encounters another student named Devon. Devon is a dreamboat, cute, talented in writing, and apparently just as shy as Eli. It is obvious to the reader that sparks are destined to fly between Devon and Eli, even though Eli seems oblivious to them at first.

 

Somehow, though, Chris's essential boorishness and lack of real consideration for Eli's essence starts to penetrate Eli's infatuated consciousness. To Eli's moral credit, he feels great guilt about questioning anything about his "relationship" with "his boyfriend, Chris." By this time, of course, the reader has gone beyond wanting to slap Eli and probably feels the urge to strangle him.

 

In the fourth chapter, which is the last one written so far, Eli finally gets up the nerve to signify to Devon that he is interested in something more between the two of them. He sets his feelings down in an impromptu piece of writing that he reads aloud to the creative writing class. It is straight from the heart, and it would seem that Devon could not miss the message, even though he is not specifically named in the piece. The woman teaching the class effuses that the piece is terrific, and then asks for class reaction:

 

She asked what the class thought, and I heard compliments like, 'fantastic', and 'awesome', and 'wow'. And one girl said, "I think it's really sad. But, like, in this really beautiful way."

 

I think it's really sad. But, like, in this really beautiful way.

That largely sums up my reaction to the story. It is very sad. Eli is wasting his time trying to have any kind of meaningful relationship with Chris. In fact, although there is no actual mention of it in the story, I believe it is a virtual certainty that Chris is probably shacking up with others behind Eli's back. Here Eli has been this faithful companion and servant to Chris, putting up with his slovenly ways, his drinking, and his general fecklessness, all the while floating on this unrealistic romantic cloud. It is almost unbearable for the reader to observe.

 

[continued in reply to this post]

Edited December 17, 2010 by Agincourt

[Agincourt]

[continued from earlier post]

 

At the end of Chapter 4. it seems that Eli has finally recognized that Chris is not the boyfriend that he believed him to be, and that Devon is someone that really could be a true soulmate. He and Devon share a timid and tentative kiss, that seems to make both of them nervous. Under other circumstances it would be incredibly cute to watch, but the reader cannot help but anticipate all manner of trouble ahead, as Eli is clearly not equipped to handle the situation he finds himself in -- he doesn't know how to break things off with Chris, although he now realizes he must; and he shows every sign of falling into an even deeper and unseeing infatuation with Devon than he did with Chris. In other words, it's as though he can't learn from experience that his intrinsic emotional nature is bound to get him into trouble again and again. Devon, in the meantime, feels guilty about the possibility that he may be driving a wedge between Eli and Chris.

 

We are left with this somewhat foreboding thought:

 

Yes, this is love. REAL love. This is what I'm supposed to be feeling. And now...all I have to do.. ...Is let my boyfriend know...

 

Somehow, we just know that this will not be pretty.

 

I have to confess that continuing this story would be difficult for me. I am assuming that it is not considered complete, but there is an argument for ending it where it is. The path ahead seems to be fairly clear. As mentioned above, I fully expect that it is only a matter of time before Eli comes upon Chris in bed with someone else. That, in a way, would make Eli's job of breaking up much easier. Everything we've seen points to the wisdom of breaking up with Chris and developing a relationship with Devon. But on the whole I'm not sure how much dramatic tension is left in the story at this point, if that's the direction it chooses to go.

 

Far more interesting, if somewhat implausible, would be a story line in which we discover that Chris really has more feelings for Eli than we give him credit for. In that scenario, Eli wouldn't find Chris in bed with someone else; rather, on the day when Eli had made up his mind to break things off with Chris, he would arrive home to discover that Chris had arranged a whole romantic dinner and evening for the two of them, uncharacteristically tying into everything the Eli values the most. That would really put Eli in a pickle.

 

On the whole, though, it certainly seems, from all the evidence we've seen, that Eli would be much better off with Devon. It's kind of like the choice confronting Zac in Door Number Three, where he must decide among different relationship paths, all of which carry risks and uncertainties. The difference is that Zac seems to be able to muster the emotional maturity to recognize the nature of the choice he's making. Such emotional maturity seems to be lacking in Eli, and we can't help but fear that he will be wounded again. It would be tremendously rewarding if Eli could find a way to triumph over the circumstances he is presented with, unlikely as that seems right now.

 

A

 

[NOTE: I spent more than an hour trying to post this review. It required posting paragraph by paragraph, using the edit function, and then I still ran into the obnoxious error message "You must add a post" when I reached the point where this reply begins. I'm not sure what's going on with the forum software, but it is highly obnoxious.]

[Linxe Termoil]

Please ignore this post. I'm currently troubleshooting the quote process that was causing problems.

Edited December 17, 2010 by Linxe Termoil

[Linxe Termoil]

edited out.

 

I went into the links you provided and even into the story and pulled random paragraphs, then quoted them and posted with no problems. Whatever problems you seem to have been having appear to have worked themselves out as I am currently not having any problems with posting. If you run into this problem again highlight all your text and just click remove formatting.

 

Linxe

Edited December 17, 2010 by Linxe Termoil

[Agincourt]

Heavens to Betsy -- I just noticed that new (and apparently concluding) chapters have been posted for this story. Now I'm really going to be curious to see where the story goes.

 

A