Depression

[Mikelaing74]

Hi guys, sorry I've not been around for a while but some crap in the 'real' world needed dealing with.

 

First of all the lovely house that Snuggle and I we're going to buy may not be happening now. The current owners are refusing to let me have a full structural survey of the house carried out, needless to say this has set massive alarm bells off in my head. So we withdrew our offer to purchase. Once we did that, the estate agent (may they all be cursed) is trying to claim we formed a contract when we made the offer to purchase. So in the spirit of grinding him to mincemeat I've taken the reigns off of Snuggle. We'll post whatever is left back to his family. It's worth mentioning that Snuggle is a lawyer, but I love him anyways

 

Then after the excitement of that, my dad try's to be superman ! He's nearly sixty ! Fell off a ladder, luckily didn't brake anything but he was sore and confined to bed for a couple of days, so I had to head on back to the hometown to help out for a wee while.

 

Needless to say I've been a wee bit stressed, but the new drugs seem t be working.

 

And here's where I want to pick up on what Joe has said. Drugs don't work for everyone. But the community here at GA is really helpful in giving all of us a safe place to vent.

 

Hugs to one and all

[Mark92]

So so sorry Mike I know that place looked ideal for you. And I agree with the alarm bells too. If there was nothing wrong, why refuse it?

We all hope dad is feeling better now too If you need a vent in just one ear its here.

 

 

Hugs all round too

[Mikelaing74]

So so sorry Mike I know that place looked ideal for you. And I agree with the alarm bells too. If there was nothing wrong, why refuse it?

We all hope dad is feeling better now too If you need a vent in just one ear its here.

 

 

Hugs all round too

 

Cheers Marky, as soon as they said they wern't going to allow the survey all I could hear in my head was 'Danger Will Robinson !'

 

Dad's on the mend, I've left him in the tender mercies of my mother. Just think of a five foot tall tiger that hasn't been fed for a month and has a really itchy nose, I almost feel sorry for him

 

[comicfan]

Mike,

 

Sorry to hear that the house fell through. I wouldn't have gone forward with the purchase either.

 

Also sorry to hear about your dad. I do hope all is well. Keep us informed. In the meantime both of you will be kept in my prayers.

 

Feel free to vent, that is why we are here.

[Mikelaing74]

Thanks for that Charlie Brown, I'd rather not bother with the house than end up with a nightmare. As for my dad, he's getting better, he'll be back to his old self in no time, mum is already telling me she's considering tieing him to the bed so he will actually rest !

[Zolia Lily]

Thanks for that Charlie Brown, I'd rather not bother with the house than end up with a nightmare. As for my dad, he's getting better, he'll be back to his old self in no time, mum is already telling me she's considering tieing him to the bed so he will actually rest !

 

Well said - i went through this recently! We were really pushed and hurried into signing a contract for an apartment which LOOKED and sounded great on paper - all newly repainted, all the furniture brand new. SHould have thought to ask WHY though - and asked to see documentation (ie. that the landlord has carried out sufficient checks to prove that the apartment is habitable) - because as soon as we moved in... bed bugs. DRAMA and then massive arguements with the agent about who gets to pay for it. No proof we didn't bring them in, you see, but they've got no proof the problem wasn't pre existing either....

 

All good now, but listen when you hear those alarm bells going!

[Mikelaing74]

Well said - i went through this recently! We were really pushed and hurried into signing a contract for an apartment which LOOKED and sounded great on paper - all newly repainted, all the furniture brand new. SHould have thought to ask WHY though - and asked to see documentation (ie. that the landlord has carried out sufficient checks to prove that the apartment is habitable) - because as soon as we moved in... bed bugs. DRAMA and then massive arguements with the agent about who gets to pay for it. No proof we didn't bring them in, you see, but they've got no proof the problem wasn't pre existing either....

 

All good now, but listen when you hear those alarm bells going!

 

Thanks for that Zola, I'm more concerned about dry rot/subsidence than infestation. Plus with the estate agent being a dick about things it's far easier to walk away. On a happier note, Snuggle has convinced the estate agent that no contract was formed and taking us to court would be oh so expensive, so they've given up on that avenue.

 

Hugs all

[Arpeggio]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

[Mikelaing74]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

 

Arpeggio I hope you get the right result

[CassieQ]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

 

Hope everything turns out okay

[Mark92]

We all care what happens Lacey, keep us informed and good luck

[Yettie One]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

 

Awwww Arpeggio that is not pleasant. really hope that you get good news. Hope your ok.

[K.C.]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

 

Lacey, I really hope it's good news. Will keep you in my prayers!

[Arpeggio]

Thanks

[harcallard]

I was referred to this page by a a friend.. I am indeed depressed quite often...I joined this channel a few months ago and was quickly ostracized by many especially in the chat room.. I have been told that I have an over bearing personality, of which I have been told I have had since I was a small kid... I think someone told me in the 6th grade, that I was an attention seeker. I don't wnat anyone's pity and I know some wont care and other's will. I have been accused of being "Clingy and Needy".

 

I felt like I hads to fight for the attention from my family while growing up, and felt quite often, that people were ignoring me, and found out later on, that this was true. So after awhile, I slowly with drew into myself and spoke to no one.. well I spoke only when spoken too. My parents and family just thought this was a phase I was going through. I guess I do try to hard to get people to like me. Everyone I have talked to says the same thing... "WEll just dont try hard let them come to you," and this is one of my phobias is that htey wont....I am afraid tha tI am slowly going back to the uncaring adn cold person I have fought for so many years not to become again..For instance when I joined the chat channel, of which I am now banned, I was immediately jumped on by two individuals of who I dont care to even speak their names because of thier insignificance to me. I was just being my self.. and after all, isnt that hwat we are suppose to be anyway?

 

I do apologize for rambling.. I do this quite often and my mind shifts from one thing to another. well here are some examples which have caused my phobia of being ignored and not liked to rise to the surface. I wont mention any names just instances. One thing I dont understand and probably never understand is how people can multitask... I am not a multitasker, for my ADD, keeps me from this.. I mean I wil be talking with someone, lets say in Skupe or MSn, and its like 30-40 minutes between each reply..okay .. they must be busy.. but then I come back and find out they have been have a full conversation with someone else the whole time. This makes me feel even worse. I ahve on several occassions mentioned this fact to the person (s) invovled and it is asid I had been talking to a wall. Thewir response was "Well I have so many things to do.. I just cant sit and devote all my time to just one person.. I am like what ever happened to this practice? Then this example just happeended not to long ago, I know a persaon who is going through somethign in their live right now and they told me about it, only by me asking questions, and not voluntarily on their part. Then i find out the whole time they have been telling it to other people adn then thanking themlater on for being there for them.. I dont get it.. so this spiraled me further down.

 

I am a nice and caring person. However, I find myself slowly ,like I said earlier, becoming the cold and uncaring person I had once been. I guess I shouldn't let this bother me, but it doesn't work like that, because it does, and it bothers me bad. I mean hell. I am still getting ignored by my own family..They all took off for hawaii for two weeks, and didn't even call me to ask if I wanted to go, of which I would have refused, but they took away my chance to turn them down... Im to the point i am tired of people ignoring me and not wanting to associate with me.. Why do I always have to be the one to back away and let them come to me? Who wrote the damn rule book on this?

 

I have also heard that for many years that me being depressed is my own fault and its all in my head.. Well I know I have to take responsibility for it. HOwever, others must tae the responsibility that they often cause it..or rather I let what they do affect me.. so I agree that I need to take responsibility for how I react to people.. I need to just have the ideology that you cant not take my happiness away by your uncaring and self importance attitude(s).

 

If any one has any thought or suggestions please respond.

[harcallard]

Hope it turns out okay for you Arpeggio.

[Mark92]

I can only go on my own experience,.When I first joined GA I was a complete doof on the PC and multitasking was something everyone else did. I couldn't for love nor money. Different reasons to you, but still as annoying. Making friends was a lot easier for me, I was on such a huge learning curve, everyone wanted to help and I accepted. People here do care, you just have to be prepared to listen to their woe's, and happy times, as you want them to listen to yours. Be yourself and try to stay upbeat. Not always the easiest thing. Wearing a mask is a big thing here, for quite a few people. Vent here in this thread or in the soap box if there is something more controversial, and keep your happy faces for those that need them. Being happy draws people to you, then when you have made closer friends you can vent to them, and they wont mind. This may not be of any use to you. Sorry for that and hugs anyway

[comicfan]

I'm stuck right in the middle of a cancer scare. After Tuesday, I'll either be more depressed or never depressed again. lol

 

Lacey,

 

I'll be keeping you in my prayers.

[comicfan]

I was referred to this page by a a friend.. I am indeed depressed quite often...I joined this channel a few months ago and was quickly ostracized by many especially in the chat room.. I have been told that I have an over bearing personality, of which I have been told I have had since I was a small kid... I think someone told me in the 6th grade, that I was an attention seeker. I don't wnat anyone's pity and I know some wont care and other's will. I have been accused of being "Clingy and Needy".

 

I felt like I hads to fight for the attention from my family while growing up, and felt quite often, that people were ignoring me, and found out later on, that this was true. So after awhile, I slowly with drew into myself and spoke to no one.. well I spoke only when spoken too. My parents and family just thought this was a phase I was going through. I guess I do try to hard to get people to like me. Everyone I have talked to says the same thing... "WEll just dont try hard let them come to you," and this is one of my phobias is that htey wont....I am afraid tha tI am slowly going back to the uncaring adn cold person I have fought for so many years not to become again..For instance when I joined the chat channel, of which I am now banned, I was immediately jumped on by two individuals of who I dont care to even speak their names because of thier insignificance to me. I was just being my self.. and after all, isnt that hwat we are suppose to be anyway?

 

I do apologize for rambling.. I do this quite often and my mind shifts from one thing to another. well here are some examples which have caused my phobia of being ignored and not liked to rise to the surface. I wont mention any names just instances. One thing I dont understand and probably never understand is how people can multitask... I am not a multitasker, for my ADD, keeps me from this.. I mean I wil be talking with someone, lets say in Skupe or MSn, and its like 30-40 minutes between each reply..okay .. they must be busy.. but then I come back and find out they have been have a full conversation with someone else the whole time. This makes me feel even worse. I ahve on several occassions mentioned this fact to the person (s) invovled and it is asid I had been talking to a wall. Thewir response was "Well I have so many things to do.. I just cant sit and devote all my time to just one person.. I am like what ever happened to this practice? Then this example just happeended not to long ago, I know a persaon who is going through somethign in their live right now and they told me about it, only by me asking questions, and not voluntarily on their part. Then i find out the whole time they have been telling it to other people adn then thanking themlater on for being there for them.. I dont get it.. so this spiraled me further down.

 

I am a nice and caring person. However, I find myself slowly ,like I said earlier, becoming the cold and uncaring person I had once been. I guess I shouldn't let this bother me, but it doesn't work like that, because it does, and it bothers me bad. I mean hell. I am still getting ignored by my own family..They all took off for hawaii for two weeks, and didn't even call me to ask if I wanted to go, of which I would have refused, but they took away my chance to turn them down... Im to the point i am tired of people ignoring me and not wanting to associate with me.. Why do I always have to be the one to back away and let them come to me? Who wrote the damn rule book on this?

 

I have also heard that for many years that me being depressed is my own fault and its all in my head.. Well I know I have to take responsibility for it. HOwever, others must take the responsibility that they often cause it..or rather I let what they do affect me.. so I agree that I need to take responsibility for how I react to people.. I need to just have the ideology that you cant not take my happiness away by your uncaring and self importance attitude(s).

 

If any one has any thought or suggestions please respond.

 

For what it is worth, most of the time I take what is said in the chat room with a grain of salt. I am not close friends with most. When I go into chat I go to have fun, kid around, and see what is happening with everyone.

 

That isn't to say I haven't made friends here. I have. There are people that have become family to me. I depend on them and they know they can depend on me, but like anyone I'm careful. You have to know who is out for friendship and who is out to take advantage. I'm usually one of the first to stop and listen to anyone.

 

Part of what you are dealing with is a result of your own upbringing. That you can't help. The things you go through as a child help to mold you. The hard part of it is finding what you can take and use in your adult life and what you have to let go of. You commented that you were told it was all in your head, well they were right. Your head is where you think or don't think about the things happening to you. You want to make a change, the only person who can make that happen is you. The thing is you might need help to do it. That might mean talking to someone, or medication. The only one who knows for sure if there is a problem is you. Sometimes the voices saying you are wrong need to be ignored.

 

One of the best things I read a while ago was life was a like a performance. You are the star. Who you let sit close to you and who you give the balcony seats to determine how your life will be. If you keep the nay sayers and aggrevaters close to you expect to feel worn down and unappreciated. If you keep those who lift you up and make you smile close, expect to go through life knowing you are supported and can make a difference. you have control on who you let in and how they will influence your life.

 

I know it isn't much but think about it. If you need an ear, well I've got one of those and am always willing to try to help if I can. So are most on this thread. Best of luck to you Harcallard.

[harcallard]

Thank you so much Comic and everyone else who have responded.. I have since posting this.. come to a realization or an Epiphany.. I am finally becoming aware of the fact that I am the only one who can make me happy and the only one who can take it away...I plan on using this thread and I am thankful to the one(s) who are responsible for creating it.

[Arpeggio]

Everything was smooth. No cancer. Thanks for all the support.

[CassieQ]

Everything was smooth. No cancer. Thanks for all the support.

 

GREAT news! I am so glad to hear it

[comicfan]

Everything was smooth. No cancer. Thanks for all the support.

 

Best news I've heard all day. Congrats Lacey. At least that is one less thing for you to worry about.

[Breeze]

Wonderful news

[Mark92]

Ditto to everyone else Lacey Great news You must be so relieved.

 

Hugs all

Edited June 8, 2012 by Mark92