ISO Beta Reader - One Time for Anthology Entry

[comicfan]

Hi All,

 

Here is what I am looking for - a beta reader.

 

What does that mean to me?

Someone who will read my work and note mistakes. Did I change a character's name? Does something not make sense? Have I given too much detail or not given enough? Does the conversations sound real? Basically you are the first person to read over and see my work. You are letting me know if it is good or needs an overhaul. I am not afraid of the red pen. You mark my mistakes and I will go fix them.

 

What is the length and tenure of this beta?

 

It is a one shot for the Anthology. It is just over 13 pages and comes in over 5.700 words. I need this back in about a week or so from you so I can get it to my editor and then on to the Anthology editing team.

 

Writing Details and Corrections

I use word. Comments or directly correcting in the story is fine. I only ask you highlight or use a different color so I know immediately where the changes are if you don't make them in the comments.

 

Title: Going Home

Word Count: 5.749

Author: Comicfan

 

Sample:

 

I could hear the song playing on my iPod and really found it sort of amusing. I really guess I was in a New York state of mind, but only because I had to go back. There was so much there I didn’t want to have to deal with. That was the whole reason I had run from it all ten years ago. Funny, you can’t really escape your past. Life has a way of forcing you to go full circle and face the things you would rather forget.              

                “Please return your seats to an upright position.” The flight attendant drew everyone’s attention with her sweet southern drawl. “At this time we ask once again that all phones, computers, iPads, and iPods are turned off as we begin to prepare for our descent. We will be arriving on time to McArthur Airport in Islip, New York. We hope you have enjoyed your flight.”

                I looked out the window and as we passed below the clouds could already make out the ocean and Fire Island as the plane approached our final destination.

                “It looks so beautiful, doesn’t it?”

                I turned and found the older lady who had been sitting next to me to looking out the window. I nodded being unable to say how I felt about finally coming home.

                I was carrying a single piece of luggage. I almost laughed as it struck me that I hadn’t been carrying much more when I left. There was just so much pain and now I was back to face more.

                As I passed through the gates and out to where people were waiting I watched as many of the people I’d been on the plane with were greeted by family and friends. My family knew I was coming in, but no one had come to greet me. I walked out the front doors of the airport and waved down a cab.

                In many ways it was stupid how I gawked at the changes. Ten years is a long time and no place stays the same. For me the island was frozen in memory, unchanging. Being here again I was faced with reality and that included all the growth and changes that had occurred in my absence. The closer the cab took me to my parent’s home the harder it was to believe all that had happened as the places where my life had been lived failed to remain as they were. The restaurant I had worked in was now a laundry mat, the movie theater was now a drug store, and the ice cream pallor where I had first met Bobby was gone and a Home Depot stood where the strip mall had been.

                As the cab pulled up to the address I couldn’t help but stare. The house seemed smaller than I remembered it being. They had redone the roof and reshingled the house as well. Now instead of the wooden shakers the house was done in a deep blue vinyl. I grabbed the bag off the seat next to me and handed the driver her fare.

                I stood for a moment and watched the cab pull down the street. A part of me wished I had never gotten out of it.

                “Guess you made it.”

                I turned around and looked up to find Lisa standing on the front step.

                “Nice to see you too, Lisa. Why yes, my flight was fine.”

                “Yeah.” She stood and wrapped her arms around herself and watched as I came in the gate and up the stairs.

 

If this looks like something you want to attempt please feel free to contact me. Thank you.