[LittleBuddhaTW] SOOTB 19

[LittleBuddhaTW]

Chapter 19 is posted ...

 

http://littlebuddhatw.gayauthors.org/SOOTB/SOOTB19.html

 

Many, many thanks to Kitty for another wonderful job editing!

 

And there's a little surprise if you check out the main page of my story site ...

 

ENJOY!

 

*Hugz*

 

Buddha

[Drewbie]

Great Chapter Buddha

 

I'm Still Worried what's going to happen with Cody and Toby.

 

Aww Mikey's going to stay with the Twins

 

Hmm has Ryan taken his pms pills yet, Although I can understand why he's acting towards Toby.

Edited June 10, 2006 by Drew

[NickolasJames8]

 

Ok, I was a little upset with Ryan after chapter 18, but now I can safely say that I likeTrent Lomax more than I like Ryan. I'm so mad at him right now. How can he do that to Toby???? Nevermind Mikey. I mean, I think it's totally messed up that he's ignoring Mikey, but Toby's scared and sick and Ryan should be there for him. I dont even care if this is his way of coping. He should just find another way

I hope Connor breaks up with him and Delcondris beats him up

[annushka]

I guess we had all fogotten how Ryan could mess up and act like a moron... But he had already done that at the beginning, turning suddenly his back on Connor after having "caught" him with Toby (although he wasn't Connor's boyfriend yet and in a way had no right to react that way...). So well, his outstanding behaviour (after he cleaned up his act) blinded us all and now we are certainly disapointed in him, but in a way, we should not have forgotten ;_;

 

I am quite appaled and hope that it won't take his brother's death for him to realize that he is behaving completely stupidely! **evil look torwards the writer**

 

Cody and Toby did look cute in Connor's eyes, but I'm not sure that they will end up together in the end, looks doomed to me... OK, I am not too found of matchmaking as well ^^;;;

 

As to Mickey, I am not surprised at the turn of event, people don't just change their mind and begin to accept their son's "gayness" after just one discussion, especially after having thrown him out to start with... So any other happier scenario chosen would have seem very unlikely. But since I am a "happy ending" fan, I hope for a good outcome! **evil look number 2 torwards the writer**

 

About the Dominic issue, I guess I feel slightly less concerned (right now), I mean, Mickey is certainly in a bad situation with his parents, that's my N

[NickolasJames8]

I dont even think Ryan deserves to end up with Ellenor Van Epps anymore...she's too good for him!!!

[Boxerdude]

Hi All, I am new to the forum but not the story. I have finished Chapter 19 and man, you just can't get enough. After going through the pages of notes, everyone seems to be on the same page as this is a very intense yet incredible story!

 

I am not a big reader, but I have to tell you that I can seem to read through these chapters so fast that it is scaring me! I like it!.

 

Now just a little bit about my point of view and to let everyone know a little about me as well. I love Connor, I can relate to Connor. When I was in JR High and High School, I was picked on the same way. I grew up in Springdale Ark which is Hillbilly town USA. You did not dare come out. But, if you were small and not athletic, you were tagged a fag. I tried and got along with most people though. I even had the panic attacks. LittleBuddahaTW's note earlier on Klonpin and Xanax is correct, but my Dr.'s have found that the Xanax is much faster reacting. Even though it is addicting, you can control the addiction as I have been taking it now for over 10 years and my dosage has not needed to be increased. I am also on Effixor another type of drug similar to Paxil. I just wish I could sing and play like Connor.

 

Bye the way, is the Pic on the home page the way you see Connor? Sure would like to see what Ryan, Toby, Cody, and Mikie look like!! That would be a real bonus.

 

Ryan is a real sweet heart, and he is having some tough times with his emotions. His reactions to things are typical of someone who likes to take their time and Ryan does. He Loves Connor so much that sometimes when I read the stories I actually cry!. Sappy I know but true. I have been with my partner for 17 years. We met when I was 23. Relationships are hard and you have to work at them. I do enjoy the way that Connor is always trying to work on his relationships and especially after his mistake with Cody concentrated on Ryan more.

 

As far as can it last? I have friends who have been together longer than me and my partner and started dating in High School. They are still in love and doing great. Are they rare, yes but it does happen. The heart does not know what time is other than it grows with time. I hope Ryan and Connor continue to grow.

 

I could write more, but I don't want to spoil any more of the chapters until some one posts something else. If I am in the wrong forum, please politely let me know.

 

Looking forward to more chapters!!! I see a movie coming out of this!!

[LittleBuddhaTW]

Hi All, I am new to the forum but not the story. I have finished Chapter 19 and man, you just can't get enough. After going through the pages of notes, everyone seems to be on the same page as this is a very intense yet incredible story!

 

Welcome aboard, Boxerdude! I'm glad you're enjoying the story, and thank you for sharing your thoughts and comments. I think you'll enjoy participating in the discussions ... just be wary of the two dudes who have pictures of goats as their avatars ... they're troublemakers! hehe

 

*Hugz*

 

Buddha

[C James]

Welcome aboard, Boxerdude! I'm glad you're enjoying the story, and thank you for sharing your thoughts and comments. I think you'll enjoy participating in the discussions ... just be wary of the two dudes who have pictures of goats as their avatars ... they're troublemakers! hehe

 

Welcome Boxerdude! Thank you for joining us!

I have absolutely no clue as to what Little Buddha could possibly mean regarding those of us with goats as avatars... I keep telling people that it's a self-pic!

 

I was delighted to read that you have been with your partner so long! I love hearing about relationships that have lasted. Congratulations!

 

I think Ryan is great, but he sure does have some problems right now. However, if Toby dies with Ryan still pushing him away, Ryan will have messed himself up for life.

 

Speaking of Toby... He sure is getting worse fast! The part about him wanting to stop treatment and "let nature take it's course" was a tear-jerker!

 

I have to wonder, though, if there are other factors contributing to him being so tired and weak. I'm thinking that it's the jet-lag, plus dealing with driving the heavy traffic, and the failure of his attempt to exact his revenge.

Link

[Conner]

I'm the good goat! Also the old goat too, I guess

 

I only get in trouble when looking out for that other goat. He's just a kidd! He's the horny one, though. Just look at his pic.

 

Since I apparently cause trouble, I will. I was not too happy with chap 19. Apart from the Mikey rescue, the whole chapter was like a holding pattern. I guess I'm impatient for the story to move forward.

 

Thanking you for joining us?? Why? Are we coming apart? :wacko:

 

Hugs,

Conner

[AFriendlyFace]

I am quite appaled and hope that it won't take his brother's death for him to realize that he is behaving completely stupidely! **evil look torwards the writer**

at the end of this chapter when Ryan said he didn't know how Toby was and that he hadn't checked on him, I was kinda scared Connor would find him dead or near death in his room. So yay that he wasn't!

 

As to Mickey, I am not surprised at the turn of event, people don't just change their mind and begin to accept their son's "gayness" after just one discussion, especially after having thrown him out to start with... So any other happier scenario chosen would have seem very unlikely. But since I am a "happy ending" fan, I hope for a good outcome! **evil look number 2 torwards the writer**

EXACTLY!

About the Dominic issue, I guess I feel slightly less concerned (right now), I mean, Mickey is certainly in a bad situation with his parents, that's my N

Edited June 11, 2006 by AFriendlyFace

[C James]

I'm the good goat! Also the old goat too, I guess

 

I only get in trouble when looking out for that other goat. He's just a kidd! He's the horny one, though. Just look at his pic.

 

Since I apparently cause trouble, I will. I was not too happy with chap 19. Apart from the Mikey rescue, the whole chapter was like a holding pattern. I guess I'm impatient for the story to move forward.

 

Uhoh! A Goat Critic!

 

But, LB couldn't have meant me... Since when do I cause any trouble? I mean just a few death threats and murder plots every once in a while surly isn't enough to get one called a troublemaker, is it?

 

I think chapter 19 was there to give a sort of passage of time, before something momentous happens in 20.

 

I loved the Mikey intervention, too! I was especially struck by the Irony: Connor, of all people, having to deal with a friend too stubborn and proud to let his friends help.

 

at the end of this chapter when Ryan said he didn't know how Toby was and that he hadn't checked on him, I was kinda scared Connor would find him dead or near death in his room. So yay that he wasn't!

 

I was thinking that too... Poor Toby!

I have a hunch that the next chapter will be critical for Toby... He's definitely in a critical phase now.

 

I have to wonder, though, if there are other factors contributing to him being so tired and weak. I'm thinking that it's the jet-lag, plus dealing with driving the heavy traffic, and the failure of his attempt to exact his revenge.

Link

LOL, C James! I was thinking when I read David's entry, "Are you sure it wasn't a goat muttering about Toby and leukemia" It hadn't occurred to me that Toby had gotten out of his sick bed himself to do the job.

 

ROFL!! YEah, I just couldn't find a way to get into Taiwan without quarantine... Plus, LB just might have noticed a sunglasses-wearing Goat riding a motor scooter.. Anonymity does not come easily for the likes of me!

 

As for Toby... There is a time gap between the two chapters sufficient for a trip to Taiwan, and I think Maggie, sweetheart that she is, would have helped him get tickets... I note that there is absolutely nothing in Chapter 19 that indicates otherwise!

[LittleBuddhaTW]

hmm, I could definitely see that, in fact it even crossed my own mind. However, I ultimately decided that I think it's good that it was done like this. It shows the intensity of the situation and establishes depth. Also it's realistic; life is like that, often just a holding pattern for awhile. Besides if I remember correctly didn't David tell us he had decided to split chapter 19 (with either 18 or 20, I think 20), so that could be part of it, and I think it was a good decision. I quite enjoyed this chapter and I'm glad that it's there, but it would have been very long had it been added in its entirety (and I wouldn't have wanted to see any of it get cut) to another chapter.

 

I think the title of this chapter -- "Where to Now, St. Peter?" -- is a pretty good indicator of what function this chapter serves, at least in my mind. And I think Kevin's comment above comes pretty close to what I was trying to do.

[C James]

ROFL!! YEah, I just couldn't find a way to get into Taiwan without quarantine... Plus, LB just might have noticed a sunglasses-wearing Goat riding a motor scooter.. Anonymity does not come easily for the likes of me!

 

Perhaps the author should start checking for tarantulas before he gets into bed from now on.

 

Aww, Kitty, I'd never do such a thing! What would be the point? The Tarantulas here, while big (up to six inches) are perfectly harmless. Kids often play with them and keep them as pets. Interestingly, Tarantulas aren't supposed to live at this high an altitude (over 7000 ft) but I suspect that the Tarantulas are ignorant of the fact, as there are loads of them here. I see them almost daily in the Spring and Summer.

 

But, as for a nice gift for LB.. What about a nice rattle to play with? I have this really cute critter in my woodpile.. It's a Sonoran Rattlesnake. Might make a nice amusing surprise gift for LB?

(see, I make helpful and generous suggestions like this, and then LB says I cause trouble.. I have no idea why.. )

 

I also get frequent visits from both black bear and mountain lions. Last year I left my screen door open while carrying in groceries, and when I turned around a Mountain lion was in my hallway and I had to shoo him out. I think it's the same one that keeps peeing on my porch, and Mountain Lion pee stinks worse than tomcat pee. Anybody know a good mountain Lion repellant?

 

Hmmm.. Maybe LB would like another cat when he moves back here to the US?

 

I think the title of this chapter -- "Where to Now, St. Peter?" -- is a pretty good indicator of what function this chapter serves, at least in my mind. And I think Kevin's comment above comes pretty close to what I was trying to do.

 

I found the chapter title rather ominous... When I hear St. Peter, I think "pearly gates", and given Toby's condition, let's just say that I was happy to see him still breathing by the end of the chapter...

 

Was the chapter title meant to be scary in that way?

 

As for Ryan's problems... I just loved this line from the chapter... "I wasn't a psychologist or anything, but it didn't take an idiot to figure out that he was scared, and perhaps this was his way of coping with it."

 

One more thing: LB's initial post mentioned a surprise on his main page... I've looked, but can't figure it out (and yes, I know I'm probably missing something obvious). Is it the "When I see you again" story icon? I think that is new, and would mean it's (as it says) coming soon, which is great news! Or is it something else and I missed it?

[LittleBuddhaTW]

One more thing: LB's initial post mentioned a surprise on his main page... I've looked, but can't figure it out (and yes, I know I'm probably missing something obvious). Is it the "When I see you again" story icon? I think that is new, and would mean it's (as it says) coming soon, which is great news! Or is it something else and I missed it?

 

Yes ... that was the surprise ... I was hoping everyone would complement Xandra Kitee on her fabulous logo design!

 

As for the chapter titles ... in case anyone hasn't figured it out yet ... they're all Elton John song titles. I spend A LOT of time thinking over each one. For some, only the title is relevant, for others, the lyrics of the song are relevant ... or both.

 

And as for tarantulas, rattlesnakes, or whatever ... I think I heard somewhere that killing a Buddha is one of the gravest possible sins, and the amount of negative karma that would be accrued is unfathomable to mortal beings.

 

[AFriendlyFace]

Yes ... that was the surprise ... I was hoping everyone would complement Xandra Kitee on her fabulous logo design!

Excellent logo, Xandra!!

As for the chapter titles ... in case anyone hasn't figured it out yet ... they're all Elton John song titles. I spend A LOT of time thinking over each one. For some, only the title is relevant, for others, the lyrics of the song are relevant ... or both.

My gosh, David, how very clever of you! That's exactly the kind of thing I like . I hadn't realized it before (since I only knew of the most popular Elton John songs), but I think it's seriously cool now that I do konw!

[Boxerdude]

Hi All,

 

Well, after seeing that everyone is caught up, I will throw in my two cents worth. I think we need to give Ryan a break! He holds everything in and I think he is a scared of everything as Toby is. Connor does not understand this and it is because Ryan did what he is doing once before. Ryan also knows that Toby is in good hands and now trusts Connor completely. His just a kid and does not want to realize what is going on around him or deal with it. Looks selfish on the outside, but truly it is a defense mechanism. I think we will see him fall apart soon because he can continue like this forever. The reason I feel this way is because my partner is the same way. Frustrating as hell sometimes but it is what it is.

 

St. Peter is definitely a scary thought as to me indicates death. I don

[NickolasJames8]

St. Peter is definitely a scary thought as to me indicates death. I don

[Boxerdude]

Nickolasjames8,

 

I am sorry if I offended you and it was wrong of me to make a blanket statement as such. I do not know what part of the country you live in but I live in Dallas, Texas the heart of the Bible Belt. There are those Baptists that do preach compassion but I am talking more about the Jerry Farwell

[NickolasJames8]

Nickolasjames8,

 

I am sorry if I offended you and it was wrong of me to make a blanket statement as such. I do not know what part of the country you live in but I live in Dallas, Texas the heart of the Bible Belt. There are those Baptists that do preach compassion but I am talking more about the Jerry Farwell

[Boxerdude]

I just don't think it is in Ryan's nature to do so. He would internalize it much more. He totally loves Connor and there is no going back. I think Ryan will have a "Come to Jesus" realization about what is going on and what real part he plays in other peoples lives. He will be changed by what ever happens but I think it will be a good change. He loves Connor to much to do anything bad to him. I have seen it many times over. Ryan will be the one who needs to heal and Connor will be the one who helps helps him heal no matter what. I have been there and done that, it is not a mystery to be solved. I just don't want Toby to die, he has such a strong life force and has so much ahead of him and he will be an impact on many peoples lives for the rest of his life. I just don't want him to end.

 

David

 

I wasn't offended, I just wanted to make the point that not all Baptists are crazy. Of course, when there are crazies like Fr*d Ph*lps(I dont want to pollute the board by spelling his full name) misrepresenting the Word of God, it's easy to see how people think Baptists and Christians in general all anti gay.

Of course, the same thing could be said for Islam. They execute gays and lesbians for being gay and lesbian, and that's pretty crazy too.

 

Either way, I think it would totally suck if Mikey commits suicide. It would send Ryan past the point of redemption as far as I'm concerned, and if Toby dies, I'll fell the same way. I wouldn't be too surprised if he goes over the edge soon and starts beating Connor.

[C James]

Yes ... that was the surprise ... I was hoping everyone would complement Xandra Kitee on her fabulous logo design!

 

As for the chapter titles ... in case anyone hasn't figured it out yet ... they're all Elton John song titles. I spend A LOT of time thinking over each one. For some, only the title is relevant, for others, the lyrics of the song are relevant ... or both.

 

That is (like all her work) fantastic! Xandra, thank you so much for all that you do...

 

As for the song titles.. I had no idea! That's brilliant! I'll have to go see if I can find the lyrics..

 

BTW, a serious word of warning: I freelance as a computer consultant (second career), and one of the most common causes of service calls to me is a teenager who has gone surfing for song lyrics. Many of those sites are spyware launchers, and once that junk infects your system it ccan be a nightmare to be rid of (sometimes requiring a full clean re-install of windows). So, if anyone is inclined to go surfing for lyrics, please be very careful, have the latest security patches, use a browser other than IE, and whatever you do, don't let it install anything, no matter what it says. (A common trick is to claim it needs to install something to view the site).

 

And as for tarantulas, rattlesnakes, or whatever ... I think I heard somewhere that killing a Buddha is one of the gravest possible sins, and the amount of negative karma that would be accrued is unfathomable to mortal beings.

 

But.. but... but... I was just thinking that you might appreciate a new pet, realy!

 

Hmmmm.. Bad Karma I can do without.. I might not like the Vipaka.

 

Hmmm... I seem to have few options here.. OK, ok, you win, no surprise new pets.. But, please bear in mind that Toby's attempt to run you down with a motor-scooter had nothing to do with me, nor will any future things Toby might try and do to you... Now, if you will excuse me, I've got to go burn the receipts for the airline tickets I bought for Toby...

 

Hi All,

 

Well, after seeing that everyone is caught up, I will throw in my two cents worth. I think we need to give Ryan a break! He holds everything in and I think he is a scared of everything as Toby is. Connor does not understand this and it is because Ryan did what he is doing once before. Ryan also knows that Toby is in good hands and now trusts Connor completely. His just a kid and does not want to realize what is going on around him or deal with it. Looks selfish on the outside, but truly it is a defense mechanism. I think we will see him fall apart soon because he can continue like this forever. The reason I feel this way is because my partner is the same way. Frustrating as hell sometimes but it is what it is.

 

I've been on the receiving end of that reaction too, and I see where you are coming from. However, I'm a bit concerned over the length of this reaction. If Ryan continues, and Toby dies, all other considerations aside Ryan could be messed up for life once he realizes what he has done.

 

St. Peter is definitely a scary thought as to me indicates death. I don

[Boxerdude]

Hi All,

 

I must say that this group of individuals is a breath of fresh air. I am glad that each one of you are willing to voice you own opinion. I do the devils advocate thing to get thought provoking ideas out there. None of us know what the author will do, but each of us has our own feelings about the situation. I just like the idea that there are people out there willing to discuss possibilities. I do not know if I am right or wrong, I just have my point of view. Based on my personal experience with my partner ( who by the way has a very similar personality to Ryan) I think Ryan will be fine and I think Connor will make sure that he is as I have made sure my partner is okay. 17 years of experience can lead to a bit of insight. Ryan is caught in a very confusing and frustrating situation. He will prevail though, he has Connor and that or he is his Rock. For those of us who have been through hell and back the

[LittleBuddhaTW]

Since the author has created religious beliefs as the foundation for Mikey's parents' reaction ...

 

He has?!?!?!

 

I'd better go back and do some re-reading ...

[Lacon]

Hi David and Everyone

I thought it was time for another lurker to step up and join the discussion. I've been reading Nifty for a few years now. My favorite stories have been the works of Dom Luca, Julian Gregg, Graeme, SF Writer, and The Eggman. It was a pleasant surprise to find this story. David, your work is equal to, and often superior to, the works of the writers mentioned above. I'm still shocked that this is your first novel. Your character development, plotting and style made me think that you had years of experience writing novels. I'm enjoying this story, and look forward to reading more of your work in the future.

 

Like all of you I can't wait for the next chapter of SOOTB to be posted. The story and the characters have really hooked me. I have also enjoyed reading all or your posts analyzing the story as it goes along. I hope you welcome me to join in.

 

 

Here are a few thought I have on the story at this point:

 

1) I agree that Ryan's behavior is unusual. He is withdrawing when he is needed the most. I found a clue to his behavior back in Chapter 10. At Christmas Toby got very emotional when he thought about his father. Ryan didn't seem upset at all. Is this because Ryan just didn't care for his father? I don't think so. If my math is correct, then Ryan would have been 13 or 14 when his father died. He probably feels that he had to take his Father's place and take care of everyone. This type of loss often turns people into control freaks. They have to feel that they are in charge, and often hide all emotions to avoid being seen as out of control. Ryan certainly acted that way that when he became Connor's rescuer.

 

The first time that Toby was sick his father was still around to take care of everyone. Now Toby is sick, the father is gone, and Ryan probably feels like a failure because he can't save Toby the way his father did the first time. He is probably shutting down because he feels that he can't control things, and feels that he isn't living up to a promise to his father to take care of the family.

 

I think that Ryan was acting the same way when Connor was raped. He was concerned, but didn't seem upset enough. If that happened to my boyfriend then I would have been out of control with rage. Ryan just seemed too controlled for the situation.

 

2) I'm loving Mikey's story. My favorite scene so far is the moment when Mikey came to the door on that dark rainy night. The horror movie set up was great. I guessed that it was either Cody or trent at the door. I never suspected that it was Mikey. You got me , David. That night was Mikey's worst horror story coming true. Connor was horrified that anyone could treat a nice guy like Mikey the way his parents did.

 

This was also the first moment that Connor began to question Ryan's reactions to things. It was the turning point to the second half of the story

This is just great plotting.

 

I guess I should stop now. Sorry for the long post. I've been planning to post for a while now, and these thoughts have just been piling up in my brain.

 

 

BTW a big rave to Kitty. This story is written and formatted very well. I'm sure that I am looking at your good work.

[Jack Frost]

Hmmm, nothing much new. The plot remains the same as the last chapter. Ryan is still cold. Mikey is not feeling so good after coming out. Toby is still sick taking his chemo.

 

I like the part when Connor and the guys went to crack Mikey like a nut.