Forbidden Love

[Kurt]

Forbidden Love

 

What happens when they fall in love?

What are their hearts to do?

Live their lives together?

To each other be true?

 

The love they have is simple

Simple but still complex

The love they have is hated

Hated, which makes them vexed

 

They live their lives together

So happy you can see

But there

[Bondwriter]

The rhythm and the rhymes are quite good. I can hear it read aloud in my head.

 

It might be the author's intent, but it remains really vague and it's not as touching as it would be (at least for me) were it with a few more stanzas and some more details about actual characters. Especially with such a poignant topic.

 

Bring other poems, Kurt!

[Kurt]

Thank you for the words of wisdom Bondwriter.

 

I will be the first to admit that I am bad a poetry, and all that... so yeah. I got a language assignment to write a 5 stanza ballad with abcb rhyming. So I wrote this poem.

 

I am pretty sure that this is the only poem I will post, because like I said I am not a poet, and I sure do know it! (sorry, that was pretty lame.)

 

Kurt

[Camy]

Sorry, I have to disagree with Bondwriter. I thought it worked really well just as it is. If you'd have added more details it would have lessened the impact.

 

Good poem Kurt, and do write more!

 

Camy

[Luc]

What happens when they fall in love

A love of happiness and joy

Their love is never recognized

Because a boy should not love a boy

 

Says it all right there. Very nice, Kurt.

[AFriendlyFace]

I know I've read this before, I must have commented somewhere else or something, or just negligently forgotten, but in any case I really really liked it and I thought it was awesome and very moving! It's a great poem 'for the cause' too

 

Well done, Kurt!

-Kevin