Cia

:funny: :funny: :funny: :funny: I told him I'd get him back for his heinous attempts to transfer his notoriety for cliffies to me. Do you like his pink butterfly tattoos on his shoulder? They're so manly!

CJ's most recent picture as he leads his adoring fans!

The darkness gave way to the light and I found myself just as unable to see. Tears streamed down my face as the white radiance stabbed through my eyes and blasted my brain. I groaned and turned away, stumbling with one hand over my eyes and the other stretched out in front of me. "Help!" My voice was a hoarse croak, barely audible to my own ears. My bare feet slapped down on the rough hard surface, cracks and rocks buried in the sand made me stumble. I waved my arm in front of me, recoilin

Thank you Louis! I really wanted to make a well rounded character. Talbot was different and that is exactly what I wanted to showcase. The 'point of change' is actually when the narrator notices Talbot's physical reaction to him rejecting him at the party. In my mind they were very similar, if at different stages of returning to life, so to speak. I'm not quite sure what Talbot went through but I do think at one time he was a lot like the narrator, recognized it and he wanted to make it better. In return, the narrator couldn't help but sense that and respond in a way he hadn't to anyone else. I'm glad you thought that I was able to close the story adequately. I often wonder if I get enough of an ending to satisfy the reader when I write a short story because so much is left unwritten. I want to let the reader control where they think it goes from there in their own minds but give enough of a feeling of resolution so that it doesn't appear I just left the characters hanging. Your feedback helps so much and you have given me a very thoughtful review. Thank you!! ~Cia

My first line was : I used to think I was alone. Image: A man with his arms wrapped around his chest, standing surrounded by a crowd, alone but not really. His eyes watch everyone but he doesn't speak or join in to the group. Questions: 1. Why is he alone? 2. How does everyone react to his antisocial behavior? 3. Will someone get him to come out of his shell? 4. How will they do it? Setting: His home, the one place most people feel safest. Characters that might help: 1. Family... they know your deepest secrets and are a source of strength in times of trouble. They also kick you in the butt if you need it. 2. A love interest? A new friend? Someone to jolt him out of his apathy. I'll let you guys tell me if a story came from the idea or not. I'm strangely ambivalent so any reviews or comments you have are welcome as to the writing and the story itself. Does it have a sense of movement? The lesson said a short story should begin near the middle with little background and move quickly to the culminating point. Did this story have that? Does it seem like a complete story or just a scene? Are the characters and story believable without being too boring? My story: The Breach

I think that we got a better glimpse of the person in your story than the poem, imo. The lengths he goes to in order to hide his problem and the fear and pain he experiences were palpable. I found it interesting your story about an illiterate man was written in the first person, as if he was writing it, when we know he can't. It was a strange dichotomy.

Talbot was an unexpected nudge from life I couldn't ignore.

I used to think I was alone. I even thought I wanted it that way. In a sea of people at one of my sister's parties I held myself apart; not willing to risk the contact with the skin of a stranger. I would nod politely with my arms wrapped across my chest to protect me, to keep from flying apart and losing the little breath I could draw in as I tried not to panic. At least until one party when a large body stepped up behind me and sneakily made its way between me and the wall to one side. On

Tyrannical (like me! Bow down peoples!)

I got that too I don't wanna be cookies n cream, it's all gritty and sweet. I wanna be lime green sherbet. Let's be sherbet!

Well I read a few different ways. If I'm reading for enjoyment it's almost always unconscious reading on my part. By that I mean that I don't usually see the words, I see the image the writer portrays instead. That is why I'm so keen on proper visualizations, I think, because a good story plays like a movie in my head. If it's poorly written or edited I usually can't do that though and the reading is slower and more deliberate. Often when I beta a story I will read it through for visualizations and then read it through for spelling/grammar edits. I focus differently for each type of beta work I do and that's different from how I read for pleasure.

OH, I could feel your emotion in the sadness piece Louis.

Ha Ha Ha, I got this one too! Not really my style though. I prefer to use

Happy Birthday dear!!!

WOW! I likes James. Please run with it, I want to find out what Kevin finds and how the program is exposed and hopefully stopped.

Awww, thanks! I was thinking my attempt at humor was a total fail! always appreciate the reassurance.

I hate the word panties. I typically refuse to use it. I have never known consciously why I hate it but ever since I was a kid to me it just has a dirty connontation. It makes uncomfortable just to hear it.

Happy Birthday!!

Wow, you printed it? Cool! I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I have more coming, I just have to write faster, lol. My family keeps me so busy during the summer that I can't get as much done as I would like. I have many short stories for the anthologies but you'll have to wait a bit for more novella length ones.

Oh yes, I have started writing the third story. I'll even tell you it features The Snake... but that's it You'll have to wait to find out more! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, I'm glad you liked the stories!!

Yep, yep! Full circle so to speak, they needed an heir. That was a concern all through the story. A niece was ideal for them to adopt, even if he didn't get to meet his brother.

Yes, I was tying the past to the present, so to speak. I wasn't sure exactly how I was going to link the two stories in the beginning but as I wrote it this scenario became perfect. I had to bring back Velaku and Natham, they're too cute to leave alone!

Thank you! I really wanted them to be balanced, equals though not in necessarily the same aspects of their lives. *big grins* I love getting your reviews, such lovely compliments. Thanks!!

I'm glad you liked it! Sex scenes should be realistic but still hot and steamy and fun too. I try to balance all of that when I write them. I'm glad you're still slogging through and enjoying the story!

Other than clearing up misconceptions, if you choose to, who you fall in love with or are attracted to really shouldn't have to be shouted from the rooftops. I do understand the urge but when it happens and the opportunities come, you know you will share. You're not hiding it, you're just waiting for it to be right. That's the way it should be. It's a personal thing, telling people should be personal too. And I love that your mom seems so accepting. Having a supportive family like her and your siblings is great!