AFriendlyFace

That's an extremely insightful analysis to which I personally strongly agree But aren't sharing, equality, and having more choices 'good' things in anyone's book? I think this raises the issue of whether or not some form of 'morality' or simple 'right and wrong' is instinctive or not. You may not think you need those things to make your decisions - personally I like to think that too - but your thought processes and decisions must be shaped by something mustn't they? Unless they are some how instinctual. You may no longer need religion, philosophy, natural order, or law to 'keep you in line' so to speak, because you've already determined what their underlying point was, but I think merely thinking about that has influenced you to some extent. I'm not trying to give you a hard time, I like to think as you do too, and really I'm just analyzing my own thoughts on this. Speaking for myself I'm comfortable with not following all the prescriptions of my religion or the law because I try to take everything in context and look at the underlying rationale and motives. For example I would never consider it immoral to cross a street against a light, be it on foot or in/on some vehicle. However, prohibitions against running red lights, jay walking, and crossing illegally make a lot of sense. They keep people from getting hurt and they prevent the flow of traffic from being interrupted while people are forced to wait on the illegal crosser. So in that way the laws make sense, I agree with them, and I support them. However, it's very clear to me that their function is for safety and efficiency. If I come to an intersection (again either by foot, in a car, or any other mode of transportation) and it's completely empty, and I can clearly see that it's completely empty then it is not dangerous or inefficient in the greater scheme of things for me to cross illegally and it does not make sense for me to wait under these circumstances. Of course they can't make such provisions in the law itself because it would get too convoluted and nuanced to be effective, but I don't feel any guilt or shame for violating the law in such a way that clearly makes sense and does not go against its sensible underlying cause. Anyway, the point is that I'm making my own complex, sophisticated decision regardless of the law itself. However, I've still reflected on these points because of the law. At some point I may not have been able to see the deeper underlying factors (perhaps due to a genuine inability or maybe just because I was in a hurry and wouldn't have stopped to consider the ramifications) and simply needed to be told 'don't go'. So the law did have a bearing on my thought process, even if it eventually got me to the point where I might chose to ignore it. I'm tempted to start a thread just to discuss whether or not one can ever truly 'warrant harm'. Anyway, good points Take care all and have a great day! Kevin

LOL, I always do leave a bigger tip when my server flirts with me. The other day my waiter hugged me. It really depends on circumstance. I'm sure it's because I seem to live in some cross between gay Disneyland and a Queer as Folk episode, but I meeting interesting guys my odds seem to be quite good that they're gay/bi. I'm sure this is because since my 'social network' is overwhelming composed of GLBT/Allies any 'mutual friends' I meet have a high likelihood of being gay. Apart from that I tend to go places that have a strong gay contingent anyway. And of course if I'm actually going out in the social/recreational sense of the phrase, there's a really good chance it's at a gay club, bar, or restaurant so again my odds are quite good. Apart from that, if I'm interested in a guy in the first place he has a higher than average chance of being gay/bi because I'm seldom interested in straight guys. It's like for example, if I notice a car I like it stands a very good chance of being blue. This is because I'm 'attracted' to blue cars and more likely to notice them in the first place. So even though the sheer number of blue cars might not be all that large compared to the entire sum of cars in the area, the fact that I like it predisposes it to being blue. That's all a bit off topic though I would like to remind everyone to avoid making sarcastic remarks that are directed at other members Someone could be disappointed that you didn't flirt with them. Maybe they didn't even overtly flirt with you. Maybe they just tried to make themselves attractive and available and they will be disappointed by your inaction. Just playing devil's advocate Well, this and Kit's and Corvus' earlier statements all point to one thing; it's how you define flirting. To give two extreme examples: If you automatically define flirting as something which is light, pleasant, and welcome then there may indeed be actions which are 'too much', but one cannot commit those actions without straying under the definition of 'harassment' (or whatever other word you might want to use). Thus it doesn't matter what someone does you likely wouldn't be complaining that they were flirting inappropriately since your own personal definition would preclude 'flirting' being inappropriate in the first place. Instead you would complain that the person was harassing you. or leering at you or something. On the other hand, if you define flirting as something inappropriately forward, overly sexual, or otherwise unwelcome then there may indeed be actions which are perfectly pleasant and welcome, but you wouldn't define them as 'flirting' because your definition would preclude flirting from being something that is welcome. I think everything else falls somewhere between those two points. For example Kit might welcome some friendly, social actions from strangers, but perhaps he wouldn't define them as 'flirting' because he's already decided that 'flirting' isn't welcome from strangers, so if this pleasant action is welcome then it mustn't be flirting. As an example I do intentionally flirt from time to time, but I certainly don't do it 'all the time'. On the other hand several people have said 'you flirt with everyone' or something to that effect. I've been accused of flirting with tons of people with which it was never my conscious intention to flirt. So clearly the definition the observers use has varied from my personal definition. I smile and make eye contact with everyone with whom I have any interaction. If I notice someone looking at me, or even just looking my way, I usually give them a smile and a nod. I'll politely hold a conversation (and usually fully engage in it) with anyone who tries to make small talk with me. I tend to at least giggle a bit if someone says something that they meant to be funny, and I'm the sort of person who is inclined to make amusing remarks from time to time. However, all of these things aren't my efforts to flirt; they're just the social principles to which I ascribe. I'm uncomfortable or feel rude if I don't do these things, and every now and then I'm tired, grumpy, or in a hurry and I'm not in the mood to make small talk with someone. Yet if they start chatting with me I probably will anyway. I think the key here is reading the cues that people are sending. For example I'll smile and make eye contact with the majority of people, but if they look away are start to look uncomfortable then I drop it. If they look receptive I may say 'hello' or make a casual remark about something, but again if their response is closed off I usually just smile again and go on about my business. If the conversation continues more serious, actual flirting might begin but we wouldn't have gotten to that point in most cases unless they were at least fairly receptive. I also continue to use the approach of backing off if it looks like I've made them uncomfortable. So I don't think people usually feel like they get unwanted attention from me. Also, in general I think with the more mild stuff, the chatting and smiles (which as I said I don't personally consider 'flirting' anyway) you really do have to be 'looking for it' to perceive it as flirting. Anyway, that's why I think it's usually safe to flirt with strangers without offending them, because I think that by time my conduct would reach the point at which it was clearly flirting the person would have already sent me enough cues for me to be fairly confident that it isn't 'inappropriate'. Indeed, I think the reason I ended up starting this thread was because it was one of the more relatively rare cases in which I feel like I might have 'gone too far'. Even then I don't think my behaviour would have been felt to have been inappropriate, it would have been my lack of 'follow up' that was inappropriate. Actually I usually don't have that problem either because I can similarly generally sense when the other person is interested in moving things along and if I'm not then I act to keep things at the level we're currently out or take it down a notch. The problem was that I either missed or ignored the cues he was sending and similarly ignored my own gut telling me I wasn't interested and continued to flirt back and keep 'upping the ante' until I was 'supposed' to ask him out at which point I didn't and thus made a social blunder. Anyway, I'm glad for this thread because I don't think I would have analyzed the situation in such a productive way and gleaned as much insight without this discussion! Take care all, Kevin

Great story! I really enjoyed the narrative style and I found the story very compelling! In fact I was so drawn in by the story that I didn't notice the lack of a 'ghost' until the very end of the tale when you brought that feature in! I was really stunned when I found out that Jim was dead! I guess upon reflection that means that Josh must have gone into his study to tell him what happened like he used to do when he was a kid. Jim himself must have simply been staying up with his wife waiting for Josh to come home after having been up all night, and of course that would explain why she sat in Jim's chair. It was definitely a big surprise and very unexpected! I guess Jim really was 'there all along' though! Awesome job, Steve! -Kevin

I found this piece to be quite interesting. It deals with some very deep emotions. I think we can all identify with losing someone, being the 'new kid' at school, or being in an unsatisfying relationship. York manages to touch on all these themes in his brief story! I really enjoyed comfort level the story and the characters had with their sexuality! York treated it as a total non-issue, as it should be. I was also really surprised at the end when it turned out that Bryce bore a strong resemblance to Brent! I hadn't seen that coming. Anyway, all around a very fascinating story. Nice job, York -Kevin

I really loved the structure of this poem! I

Oh my gosh, Tiff! WOW! This was incredible I confess that when I saw the graphic I was a bit put off. I was worried that it would end up being a story about the military, which no matter how well-written I seldom enjoy. Instead I was extremely pleasantly surprised by a story that is unquestionably among the best in the anthology! You offered a brilliant window into the mind of a serial killer AND into the mind of his tormentor turned victim. Both portrayals were extremely realistic and haunting and an all around joy to read! I was on the edge of my seat the whole time waiting to find out what would happen to Michael, or rather more accurately how it would happen to Michael, and darn if you still didn't manage to surprise me at the end! You also did a splendid job exploring the complicated issues of culpability for one's actions, leaving the past behind, and whether it's possible to make amends in the present. I definitely look forward to these topics being discussed as the thread progresses. All in all this story was dark, twisted, graphic, and violent; it was perfect! -Kevin

What an awesome story! Sabat has crafted an excellent tale which follows the death of Jensen and his gradual integration into the next phase of his existence. This is an extremely rich, vivid story with lots of great characters and a full, well-imagined concept of what might come after someone's death. The very moving love story which begins toward the middle of the piece almost came as a surprise me, but in retrospect it seems as though the early exposition was very well-designed to eventually lead the story in that direction. It would have been a very good piece even without the love story component, but with that component so poignantly added to the already strong, masterfully created world of the beginning part of the piece Sabat truly manages to produce a masterpiece! Wonderful story! Awesome job -Kevin

This is a very moving story about pain of losing a father and husband. I was very struck by how difficult this transition has been for Alexander and Lavender and I was really proud of the way that Lavender held together and tried to get through this for her son. It sounds like Alexander himself has really had a tough time with all of this and then also dealt with a lot of other stressful, painful situations. However, like his mother he's held together and he's making the best of it. I was really happy for the two of them at the end when they decided to sell the house and move away so that they could get a chance to 'start over'. The last few lines with the ghost watching them leave were a very pleasant surprise. Good job, Rose -Kevin

What a cool story! It was very moving and it kept me guessing all the way though! It seems that in the end it really was Alex haunting himself. On the other hand I suppose it could have partly been him and also partly the influence of Shawn. It definitely raises interesting questions. I have to say, that upon reflection I don't particularly like Alex or Shawn. Obviously Alex was self-involved, mean, and manipulative, but Shawn was definitely at fault for allowing himself to be so affected by Alex. I was also struck by the irony that the little girl/Shawn criticised Alex for blaming others for his problems, but the person in this story, IMO, who ultimately blames others for his problems is Shawn. I guess to me it goes back to "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." I think that Shawn should indeed have moved on from the emotional control which Alex, and Shawn's mother, influenced over him, and certainly after ten years. I guess that's easier said than done though. Anyway, great job Mike -Kevin

As usual JFalkon manages to craft a brilliant, compelling narrative filled with twists and turns and vivid characters! My favourite character was definitely Austin. His courage and honesty was very refreshing. I suppose Matt isn't so bad and can be forgiven for not having the confidence to come out yet. I get the impression that ultimately he will. This story also does a great job touching on stereotypes and JFalkon manages to relate them in a very convincing way without seeming to comment one way or the other. I wonder how big the college is. I was surprised when Austin knew Matt's name! It's not odd that Matt would have known him since he stood out so much, but I would have thought that Matt would just sink into the background at a university unless people specifically knew him. I wonder if this means that Austin had feelings for Matt? I'll also say that I was a bit surprised that they didn't kiss. I thought for sure that mention of the rumour started about Matt and that girl years ago was foreshadowing! Anyway, awesome job, JFalkon! I really enjoyed this one! -Kevin

I really enjoyed this story! It completely kept me guessing all the way through. I was shocked when Greg was killed and I definitely didn

I was really taken off guard by this piece right from the beginning straight through to the end! Every line had me guessing and thoroughly engrossed. The first big surprise was of course the Devil appearing out of nowhere and raping the narrator. I was then surprised for the second time when I found out how much the narrator was enjoying it! I was expecting the Devil to then kill him or something after they were done, but then out of nowhere - to me at least - he offered him a wish! It was then that I thought I'd finally pieced together where this was going; I assumed that the lusty narrator would ask for a second round! LOL When he asked for the best literature that the world has ever known the story title did of course finally make sense. However, once again I was caught off guard when it ended as dream but implied that it had happened and that the Devil had somehow tricked or double crossed the narrator. I will say this, G, a great mystery has been solved as to how you consistently turn out such truly unique, mesmerizing work Fantastic job! Kevin

I really found this piece heart-warming and evocative. It's clear that Patricia had good intentions for her son, but I found myself incredibly frustrated by her, particularly in the beginning of the story! She made some pretty big mistakes in my opinion, but she was definitely redeemable and forgivable. I must say that at first I thought the ghost would end up being Cory after he killed himself I was glad when it turned out to be her father and even happier when he was able to talk some sense into her. It's frightening to think about what he said about how Darren would have thrown Cory out! In many ways it makes me think that overall the family might have been better off without his presence, either physical or spectral. I was also pleased and surprised the next morning when Cory came in to speak with his mother and apologize. It sounds like he's a good kid who acted out in anger but regretted his actions. Of course the best part was Patricia's change of heart An excellent story, Dion! Way to go Take care and have a great day! Kevin

Wow! That was beautiful! I confess it made me cry a bit. I have a feeling that I understood things at exactly the rate I was meant to. I wasn't rushing ahead trying to guess what was happening or would happen, and I wasn't confused. I was simply enthralled in the tale you were beautifully spinning, darkfox. In the second or third section it occurred to me that the narrator had died. Then I realized his parents had sold the place, then I realized the new couple had rehired the pool boy. Then in the last scene it slowly dawned on me that the little black box was a camera. The concept that the love Lee and Michael shared was enough to set the narrator free was just beautiful and brilliantly executed. I loved that it happened in the flash of the camera as the two young lovers took a picture together I also liked how gradually 'The Pool Boy' became 'Tony' became 'Tony Acosta'. That slight, slow progression was very clever. Another technique I appreciated was the use of capital letters to refer to various things 'Mother', 'Father', 'That Night', etc. Wonderfully done and very beautiful! Great job Darkfox! -Kevin

This was certainly an interesting piece. In this creative story Corvus decides to make the ghost an incubus who is fixated on the inhabitant of his room, Matt. I really enjoyed watching Matt's range of reactions and feelings toward the ghost and it was also very fascinating seeing the development of Alex's character. I was pleased at the end when the body discovered turned out to be that of the ghost and not Matt's as the reader was led to believe. I personally think that would have been a rather abrupt, unsatisfactory ending, but making it the ghost's corpse was much more interesting. I'm looking forward to seeing how this discussion continues. Nice job, Corvus! -Kevin

This was an extremely emotional and evocative story! I was completely swept up in Ricky's world and felt so very sorry for him. This story really touches on many thoughtful themes and really speaks deeply to one's emotions. In fact this was one of the few entries which made me cry (so you know I enjoyed it! ). It's beautifully written and a real treat to read! I'm so happy that I got the chance to read it! Awesome -Kevin

This was certainly a very enjoyable story to read! I was engrossed in all the events taking place and I was really curious about Rose Ann and James Leonard. Uncle Harold was certainly the most enigmatic character though. I felt really sorry for Michael and Jerry. I, fortunately, can't imagine how difficult it must be to learn that your long-term partner has been cheating on you! I can imagine that that truly does create a hole in one's heart that isn't easily filled. I was very proud of Michael for deciding to try to fill it by taking in troubled gay teens All in all a very interesting and unique story! Good job, Carl -Kevin

This was certainly an exciting story! I enjoyed the window into a different culture and way of thinking! I have to say that the question posed by the title of the story was, to me at least, a resounding 'no'. I think that by going home in the long run Altaf only ended up endangering himself and his sister and brother-in-law and causing a more expedited death for his father. I realize that family and family obligations are very important, but I think in the long-run the family was worse off by his return. I also think that the family should want what is best for Altaf and I don't think that was going back. On the other hand, it gave him a good chance to bond with his father and set the record straight. It also enabled him to stand up to the imam and exorcise many of the demons from his past. These two things alone might have made the physical danger worth it in terms of the psychological advantages. It's also possible that this whole thing will serve as the impetus for Zara and Saleem to leave behind their current life and find something happier and more satisfying. So in that way perhaps it was good that he went. I know that going back would have been an incorrect decision for me that I wouldn't have seriously entertained in Altaf's place, but I think that what's right and wrong, particularly what is right and wrong for each individual, is a very relative matter and I mustn't allow my own concept of what I would have done and what I would have felt was best to influence my opinion of Altaf's decision. Anyway, all's well that ends well. Great story, Altimexis, and very exciting! -Kevin

I strongly second this motion. Radcliff isn't bad looking and he's a good actor, but he's not super-hot or anything. Ron is cuter IMO.

Well, here in Houston we have several 'gay stores' at which you can buy books, magazines, shirts, novelties, and sexual paraphernalia. The gay cards are usually also sold in a section of these stores. So I'm assuming some company supplies the cards to the store. I certainly don't think Hallmark cards would threaten the business of the stores themselves to any great extent, but I have no idea what else the card makers themselves make. So it seems possible that if interest and sales significantly declined the cards might not be available there anymore. On the other hand, you're right about the quality. Hallmark has three cards. There's usually a whole wall full of the gay cards at these stores. You also have a much bigger range. You can get everything from dirty, to funny, to sentimental. I think the big issue would be the convenience factor. The last time I bought one for a friend it was last minute (on the way to his party) and I had to go out of my way to pick one up. Had they been available at a CVS or something I probably would have just stopped there for speed and convenience. Of course with proper planning I'd rather have gone to the store with more selection. -Kevin

Great pic! ...but I fear this could result in another round of debate about eye colour! My vote goes to blue this time

........Eradicating people isn't evil? There was no positive off-set Of course eradicating people is evil! But as W.L. intimated WWII also resulted in major economic expansion and widespread diplomatic efforts. It probably played a major role in the eventual dissolution of the Soviet Union (which most people in Western Civilization consider a good thing), it lifted the U.S. out of a depression, and did a lot to unite Europe against the Nazis. A great deal of the world's technological advances were directly or indirectly a result of WWII and frankly given how radically different the world would be I doubt any of us born post WWII would even be alive. Of course there were many other indirect results as well, some of which most assuredly weren't good. Much of the trouble in the Middle East can directly or indirectly be traced back to WWII. Obviously it was extremely costly in terms of lives and resources as well. So no, I didn't mean to imply that the actual eradicating itself was a good thing, but the entire world would be radically different had WWII not occurred in the way that it did, which it definitely wouldn't have done without Hitler. So if you find any good in the world as it stands today it is my belief that it can be indirectly traced back to WWII (and WWI, and a great many other major events both good and bad). ....Difference between a mass murderer and a serial killer, the serial killer can be 'nice' to society and get away with it. How many times have you heard neighbors say "How nice he was!' Stalin was a mass murderer, so was Pol Pot and Hitler where is the redeeming feature here? I doubt if you were in a concentration camp as my relatives were, you could find a redeeming feature. I think it's especially important for the victims, and families of the victims, of something horrific to look for a redeeming feature in the whole thing. Look at the good which has come out of the Matthew Shepard incident. Or the Stonewall riots. Vicious murder and riots aren't generally considered good things either, but they did have overall very positive results in some ways in the way in which they unified the gay community and brought awareness to gay issues. The same can actually be said about AIDs/HIV. To go back to this, think of all the stories we've all heard of people falling in love as a result of the war? Or the heartwarming stories we've all heard of love and endurance which the Jewish people managed in the most extreme and desolate of circumstances. Events cannot happen within a vacuum. 'Bad' things inevitably spawn both more bad things and some good things. 'Good' things inevitably spawn both more good things and some bad things. The bigger and more major the event the more intense the resulting 'good' and 'bad' can be. Hasn't there been some good to the 9/11 incident? Or hurricane Katrina? I certainly think there has. Didn't Christopher Reeve inspire countless people as a result of his accident? What about Michael J. Fox and Parkinson's? I don't think that trying to find good in a bad event is dishonourable to the victims at all. If something terrible happened to me, or my family, I'd certainly be delighted if people were able to find some good in it. Going back to our examples, isn't that the reason for the Holocaust Museum? Or for the work Matthew Shepard's mother does? I'm not saying I'm glad these bad things happened to these people, but I am saying that some good can be found in these incidents, and I think that's a wonderful thing to take from it all. -Kevin

No, I definitely see your point Actually though, for me, most of the time when I'm flirted with I feel like I'm in control.

Me too, but I shan't hold my breath. It'll probably be a sunrise by the time I see it

LOL, well I can definitely see your point, but I think an unusual coloured bedroom is also kinda fun. I probably wouldn't have anything too dark, but the same old off-whites, light blues, and grays definitely get old. I couldn't play the video. The link brought up a page where the video obviously should have been, but that part of the screen was completely blank. Awesome picuture, Bry I was actually thinking what beautiful green eyes he had. Maybe it was just the shirt was making them look green though. LOL, so which is it Bry, do you have blue eyes or green?