AFriendlyFace

That was my take too. No reason to apologize for my faulty counting, lol! Although, if you want to make it up to me with a new chapter You're very welcome! It's the least I can do after reading a great chapter! I really like how it seems like a major aspect of this story is going to be Joe getting over his issues. It's interesting that he was so well-adjusted to begin with and got so 'messed up' as a result of everything that happened. Makes for a very poignant story! Take care and have a great day, Kevin

Awesome job, Luigi! I thoroughly enjoyed this story! Not too much more I can add that hasn't already been said, but I will say that I was really pleased when you had Sean give Mike the safe sex talk! Well done! Great story all around -Kevin

I've never seen, or even heard, of the show...isn't making me want to though

LOL, but isn't it possible that Cody isn't the only guy in the world for Eric? I'm just saying ...yeah maybe he just injects the grease directly into his veins. Hmm, I never thought their dad might be a criminal. I thought he was the business partner to the legitimate side of Jerry's dealings. Good point about the general's son! I'd forgotten that Though I was thinking he was probably there to try to mend fences. I find it unlikely that Jerry had anything to do with JT's homophobia...what would have been his point? Jerry himself didn't seem homophobic so unless he had a similar, specific reason for trying to sway JT I can't imagine his motivation. The only possible scenario I see is if that was just the general story Jerry told everyone (which I suppose it would have been!), so maybe that in and of itself also added to JT's homophobia, but I can't imagine Jerry's specific motivation to trying to homophobia-ize JT I guess we'll find out soon enough! Looking forward to chapter two! -Kevin

Oh my! I do the opposite! I hate to be any of my characters! Well I'd hate to be any of my main characters anyway.

I'm so sorry, Tim. I'll keep you guys in my thoughts and prayers. Let me know what happens and hang in there. -Kevin

Awww such a sweet story! I'm so happy for Varun and Karan! It was very informative about another culture and I liked how you tailored the wedding to fit the two grooms! Awesome

What a creative idea! Definitely a really great storyline! One comment on the whole Sean debate: If he does that I think it's almost guaranteed that Calvin and Craig won't be able to make it work. It would be way too difficult with such a serious ex lurking around. I also think that they have a decent chance of making it work. Probably more like 50/50 IMO. Actually, we don't know if it's a first time author! It could be anyone who just didn't want to tack their name to the byline! I am a bit curious now too, lol

An interesting topic! Actually, I personally think it might be better suited to the Writer's Corner since it's mostly directed to writers. But your call of course Anyway, I've definitely never written a character based on myself. Nor have I written a character based on anyone else. HOWEVER, the majority of the characters in BMAD have bits and pieces of them based on real people. For example Aaron has my two majors (only for me it was a double major, for him it's a major/minor). Cosmo has my drink of choice as his namesake (though I'm not as exclusive about drinking Cosmos as he is). Bits my personality are infused in different ways into Aaron, Mick, Ben, Cosmo, and Ronnie. Bits of Ronnie and Cosmo are also very loosely based on bits of other people I know. So for that story, it's sort of like a lot of myself and a lot of the people I know have been shoved in, tossed in a blender if you will, and the characters pulled out with various aspects. However, the majority of their traits are completely original. All of the plot is completely original. Really, that story's as close as I get to this as well. None of my characters in Indefensible, If No One Notices, or Giving Up are based on real life people to any extent.

Dion, I just read all 8 chapters! It's an awesome story for sure! I was shocked with the end of chapter 6. I really thought he was trying to commit suicide in that chapter. Basically I thought he'd get some major bleeding started with all that pulling off his bandages and hot water and bleed to death. I mean, I figured it wouldn't actually work at that point given the story set up, but I thought that was his intent. I was surprised to discover it wasn't. I'm really like Adam! He's a great character. I somehow managed to pull a nasty trick on myself. I knew there were 8 chapters but I evidently lost count while I was reading them. As such when I got to the end of chapter 8 I thought I had a whole other chapter to go...no such luck Anyway, keep up the good work! Can't wait to read the next one! -Kevin

I can see the new one now Nifty!

I agree, Graeme! Those sorts of things do go a long way toward steering society into a more accepting atmosphere!

Wonderful indeed, Sacha! I'm celebrating only have two more days left of my crazy, annoying class!

I want to be really careful what I say to avoid giving out spoilers, but I have to say I think this is an extremely well thought-out analysis! As the author I don't want to confirm or discredit it, but I'm dying to hear what other readers think about it! Thanks for the movie recommendation! I'm actually having a movie night with some friends Saturday. I'll recommend this one! I think that's an extremely astute evaluation in general my lips are sealed about how it ties into BMAD/WAS though Very true! Thanks, Cyn! I really appreciate it! I hope you enjoy the sequel as well! Wow! Thanks Steve! I'm really flattered! I'm really glad you commented on this! My personal impression of character development thus far is indeed that it's focused on Aaron, Ben, and Mick. However, I also feel like we've got a decent handle - or at least the beginning of one - on Ronnie (who, IMO, played a major role in chapter 3: Makeover Madness as well as Chapter 9: I Can't Even Think Straight ). It's my opinion that Ronnie, Jake, and Cosmo have had a fairly influential hand in the events thus far. I agree that Jake is one of the more fleshed out characters so far, but I feel like we're starting to see decent development with Cosmo as well (though probably not to quite the same extent as Jake and Ronnie). I will admit that Amanda, Daisy, and Giorgio are the most mysterious characters as this point! As I see the story, Aaron is the 'main character'. This is more about him than it is about Ben, Mick, or anyone else. Ben and Mick would definitely be on the next tier and in many ways they're really only a couple of notches down from Aaron. Cosmo, Ronnie, and Jake are the three most important 'supporting characters'. I expect to have them really well developed by the end of the story (the final end that is). Daisy, and Giorgio would slip in after them and I expect them to get a very fair and thorough due as well. Amanda creeps in just behind them. I'm not completely sure where she'll take me at this point. I confess that thus far in the story, and thus far in what I've written of WAS, her primary function has been in terms of how she relates to Jake and Ronnie (who as I said I would consider two of my most important 'non-starring' characters if you will). So you're right, Steve: I have nine characters so far that have an important role in the development of the story. I will say that my opinion and analysis so far is based on BMAD, what I've written of WAS, and the outline I have. There will definitely be other characters in the sequel who may or may not be enduring, and these characters, as well as the ones mentioned above, are certainly 'subject to change' in terms of their importance and focus. I'm not going to be rigid and refuse to let the story take me where it feels appropriate. Well, you mentioned that you thought Aaron, Ben, Mick and Jake had had a lot 'screen time' , I'll say this the first few chapters of WAS focus a good bit of attention on the development of another character. Anyway, I'm a very character oriented writer, so I certainly hope I am able to give all nine (and maybe more ) their fair due. I think that's definitely a very sensible and accurate analysis as well! Thanks Steve, I hope you enjoy the sequel as well! -Kevin

Wow! What an awesome story!! I noticed that too, Graeme. I also assumed the characters were about that age. Well said, Cyn! I disagree, Tim. It's generally accepted that about one in ten males will be gay. That means that if twenty boys know each other two of them will be gay. Now I suppose in terms of sheer numbers it would seem unlikely that those two guys would randomly end up being close friends with each other. However, in terms of the real world, and personality I don't think it is. For example two gay kids might feel 'different', if they met another kid like this and they developed a feeling of 'kindred spirits' that could easily lead to them forming a close, best-friend relationship prior to either being out. Also, not to be overly stereotypical but they may indeed have separate interests and hobbies that the other boys aren't particularly interested in that would also lead them to pair off. Just for the sake of being stereotypical maybe they both like drama, music, art etc (I think the whole subconsciously realizing they're kindred spirits thing is more salient though). I'll use myself as an example. One of my fairly close male friends turned out to be gay and three of my close/fairly close female friends turned out to be lesbians! We were all in the closet at the time but years later look how things turned out? Anyway, my points is that I think merely being gay or lesbian makes one subconsciously more likely to form friendships with other gays and lesbians. So it's not a random percentage thing. To me it's simply a matter of a 'birds of a feather' thing. In any case, I didn't think either Jamie or Evan were gay and I certainly didn't think they were boyfriends. So I guess I'm off topic I don't mislead the reader! ...I simply create situations in which the reader may possibly make fallacious assumptions I can't add too much to what has already been said, although I definitely agree! I will throw in a new topic though if you don't mind. What was everyone's perception of Jamie? One of the things I was struck by was how different he seemed in the scenes with Mr and Mrs Goldsmith to how he seemed in the scenes with Evan and Porter. Of course it all fit together perfectly at the end and made him a very consistent character (indeed he wouldn't have been consistent if he'd seemed consistent ), but I noticed how differently he acted in the two settings. With Mrs. Goldsmith he seemed apologetic, but very fatalistic and apt to justify his and/or Evan's behaviour. With Evan he tried to counsel him against his actions and he seemed more positive and encouraging. Did anyone else notice that? I noticed it the most between the first and third scene (the third scene being the second with Jamie). As the story progressed he sort of 'fused' into a unified character. Which was very well done, Tiff! Way to go! A couple of other comments on Jamie: Do people agree with his actions? Basically he agreed to help Evan without knowing what he was getting into then he felt obligated to go ahead and get directions to the river and take Evan and Porter out there. Personally speaking, I wouldn't have done that. I've have physically dragged Evan home to talk to his mom! (or tried if I weren't big enough to accomplish the task) Or I'd have gone straight to his mother myself, but I wouldn't have gone ahead and taken Evan out to the river. Of course this can be attributed to Jamie being a young teen. At that age being bound by promises, secrecy and such things is a bigger part of the culture. "but you promised" So in that way it was very sensible, believable, and accurate for a young teen. It's not the way I would have expected an adult to behave though. On another point, did Evan need Jamie for his plans at all? He'd already spoken to the reverend (or for some reason I thought his son), so he probably could have gotten directions out to the river without involving Jamie at all. Jamie's function for Evan seems to me to have been mostly for moral support. Anyway, awesome story, Tiff! I really enjoyed it! -Kevin

Great story! I was really struck by the positive, warm tone of the whole thing! The big shocker, for me at least, was definitely Carrie! I've never read the other stories in this universe, but I'm very interested now! Awesome job -Kevin

Trust that you won't. Trust him. Trust yourself. It's good to be cognizant of possible problems, and you definitely need to be careful, but I'm a firm believe in self-fulfilling prophecies. What believe is what you'll put out there. Have faith in yourself, him, and the relationship (the platonic relationship that is). I personally think you'll be fine

I don't know much about CRVboy. Tonight was the first time I'd ever visited the forum...I too was unaware that it even existed As such I guess I don't have too much to say about it. On a side note, major props for your safe sex message, Nick!!!

That's hilarious!

LOL, you have a much higher posting rate than I do, and CJ has more posts. So I think a good case can be argued for both of you as well! I'm a more 'seasonal poster', sometimes I have a lot to say, other times I can go missing entirely I admit I have been very active the past couple of months though. In any case, I think Graeme and Beasty should be on the poll as well!

Awesome chapter, CJ!!!!! I already get the impression that I'm going to enjoy this story immensely! That was the first thing I was going to comment on too! :nuke: Hopefully the banana was a side and not a topping. Sounds Polish to me. I suspect the general is going to be very instrumental in getting JT and the boys to confront each other! Another note, anyone notice the increased ambiguity of Eric's sexuality? He's pretty comfortable with the idea of male strippers, and I noticed how he said having females strippers at Brandon and Chase's wedding would be like having male strippers at yours (not 'yours or mine"). In the same breath he did say, "I like the ladies as much as you do...", but he didn't say anything about liking the guys Anyway, as I said, great chapter, CJ!!! Can't wait for the next! Kevin

No comment, but I'm enjoying this thread immensely

Thanks, Kit! I'm relieved that for some it did successfully evoke the imagery I had in mind. Oh I dunno. As an author 'good writing' is the ideal entity of which to be a 'tenant'. Indeed, I hope to get a lease there myself one day. In all seriousness, I've made the exact same error before and only narrowly managed to catch it and edit it out before everyone noticed. Darn homophones! Thank you, Kit! I really appreciate these comments and I think those are excellent points! I got a big kick out of these stories! They seem like exactly the sort of situations I'd find myself in as well.

Thanks Steph! It was my favourite one as well, and I was trying to make it the most intense. Thanks Maddy! LOL, I love talking about my chapter titles! The title to this chapter got changed. It was originally "The Truth Really Hurts" - with an emphasis on 'Really', it was a reference to chapter 6's title. I thought it sucked! I came up with "Breaking Up With My Boyfriend" and found it much more appropriate. It goes back to what Steph speculated at the end of chapter 9. Aaron essentially broke up with his 'pretend boyfriend', Mick. It was supposed to sort of keep the reader guessing until the end since Ben and Mick were both Aaron's 'boyfriends' in different ways. I didn't mean for it to seem incomplete or like foreshadowing. I wanted that chapter to give resolution about which direction Aaron would head. Basically in chapters 8,9, and 10 he was torn between Ben and Mick in one way or another. He wasn't completely focusing on either. Now, he's 'broken up' with Mick (even if it was only in his own head). I don't want that to imply that they won't be friends anymore, only that Aaron will give his primary time and attention to Ben now. Thanks Tim I will! Hehe, there's a special 'treat' in chapter one; I can't wait for your feedback on it! (and everyone else's!) Awww thanks, Tiff! Thanks, I was trying to show that Aaron and Mick both had each other's best interests at heart. I was kinda thinking people would either crucify Mick for not telling Aaron (assuming Aaron is correct), or crucify Aaron for not actually confronting Mick. I think those are actually fairly valid points personally, but I wanted to show that they each had good intentions and honourable motives. Thanks!! Wow! Thanks Gabe! I think you've made some excellent points. In fact I think you're straight up right. It looks like it's generally pretty well agreed upon that BMAD wouldn't work as a single story in its own right with this conclusion. Despite what everyone seems to think, I really didn't mean for this to be a big cliffhanger. Fortunately there is more to the story, because if there weren't I may have ended the story completely just like that. On the other hand I might not have. Basically what happened is that when I finished chapter 10 (which I'd never intended to be the last chapter prior to writing it) I realized that it seemed pretty final (to me anyway). I also realized that essentially everything after it would be very different from everything before it. I guess you could say that I ended it 'paragraph style'. Basically it seemed right to end the story because I was done with 'that thought'. Everything in the next 'paragraph' will go in a different direction. However, I should have followed the fundamental rules of writing and not changed paragraphs until I'd finished properly expounding on the last one. I went to bed shortly after completely chapter 10 and the more I thought about where I wanted to take the story and what was going to happen next, the more I became convinced that chapter 10 was a good stopping point. I re-wrote the end of chapter 10 several times, in fact it's the most edited chapter (poor Sharon kept editing it only to have me completely change it again :wacko: ) Another thing I toyed with was simply re-writing the end of the Aaron/Mick bedroom scene a bit and having chapter 10 end there. THEN, using the subsequent brief monologue as a sort of mini-epilogue. Ultimately I decided that was pointless though, and that it might seem abrupt (even more so evidently) to end the story at the bedroom scene. So yeah, I probably goofed up pretty big Thanks for letting me know and explaining why...I might not have gotten it at all otherwise I hope this doesn't shake anyone's faith in my ability to properly end a story (which I think is a very valid consideration when deciding whether or not to read). I already have the ending of WAS planned out and it really really seems final to me.

Thanks Richard! I'm really grateful for more feedback on how this came off! Thanks Steph! I'm really happy and flattered that you found it an engaging read! I'm also glad (in the sense that it's informative) to know that you also paused over Corvus' example. I'll have to try to consider these things more carefully. On the other hand you ultimately decided that the line was a net positive for the story? Or that it was simply largely irrelevant? Thanks Sounds like it came off - for you (and several others ) - exactly as I intended, so yay lol!