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Yettie One

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  1. Yettie One
    Art in its basic form should be viewed as a celebration of humanity. Be it paints applied to a canvass, or ink on a paper, music from an orchestra, or motion picture on a screen, it is the giving of pleasure from one to another.
     
    Art is something we turn to for enjoyment, pleasure and contentment. I don't think we stop enough to consider how much art impacts on our lives, how it creates in us a world of emotions and expressions, how it helps us to communicate and record our history. It impresses us, inspires us and give us cause for reflection. It touches our lives in almost every way possible, and is something that we take for granted.
     
    Think about it the next time that you reach of a book, or read a story on GA. There are times that we may not enjoy what we read, or think it very good, but it is art that you are reviewing. The next time you look at a news paper, or read a magazine, it is art you are investing your time in. Stop to admire a car, or lie back relaxing with a glass of wine while listening to your favourite piece of piano music.What ever it is, there is art associated with it.
     
    In our modern world, art can be associated with so many things. Take cooking or eating out for example. Food preparation and presentation have become an art form all in itself. You only have to watch one of these ultra cool chef programs on the telly these days to see how much art goes into presenting a stunning plate of food on the table for us to eat. We appreciate the visual impact as well as the taste sensation of what we eat.
     
    I was sitting in a quiet country pub this afternoon watching them preparing cocktails, and wow, that was a talent exhibition of note. The young bar man was extremely well versed in flaring the bottles, and putting on a show while cooking up a cosmopolitan or a long island iced tea. And the visually stunning blues, greens and yellows of the drinks that left the bar to go to various customers were eye catching and were it not for the fact I had to drive, I'd possibly have been tempted to partake of these magnificent looking offerings.
     
    I recall a number of years back when I was working for a particular shopping chain in the UK, at how much emphasis they placed on window dressing and shelf presentation. It was as they called it the Art form that prompted buying. Shelving plans were received every few weeks from a head office team that would sit and work out exactly where every product was to be placed in order to be visually dynamic but also to inspire people to buy. The scary thing was, that it worked.
     
    I love my music, I adore reading. I enjoy a stunning sun set. I love a quiet candle lit dinner. I love the sound of the sea. All these things are art to me. Special, treasures and a huge part of my life and the world I live in. I guess I'm a bit of a romantic in that way, but I am grateful for these things, for thinking of living in a world without these things would be completely not worth contemplating.
     
    Thought for today - "Adopt the pace of nature, her secret is patience." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
     
    Song for today - Waterfall by The Stone Roses
  2. Yettie One
    When you are young, you can't wait to grow up. When you get older you suddenly wake up to realise that you can't slow life down fast enough, and dream of going back to the days when you were a wee nipper.
     
    I fondly sit and recall my youth. Those wild days of wreckless abandon when I didn't care about what the world thought, where it didn't matter to me if I was bunking off my lessons, or late to finish an assignment. The pressures of the world meant nothing, and the responsibility of being human were meaningless and unimportant.
     
    If there is one thing I have learnt looking back in retrospect it is that given what I know today, I would have lived my youth up even more. I would have spent every day living my young days to the maximum. I would have put less emphasis on worrying about the things I couldn't change, and lived to enjoy the things I could.
     
    How often do we as mature adults think to ourselves, "If only I had known then, what I do now"?
     
    Yet do we pass this message on to our young people today? I'm not convinced we do it enough.
     
    If we were on our death bed and talking to those we loved, what would we want to pass on to them? Wouldn't we want to encourage them to live every day as if it were their last? Wouldn't we tell them to be all they can be, and try anything for they can become and be whatever they choose to be?
     
    I was blessed to grow up in an environment where I was largely shielded from the complexities of life. Issues like sexuality, peer pressure, drink and drugs were scarce, friendships were simple and life was good. It was more important to know which of us was bringing the tent, than to know who had the dope, or who had caught more fish on the weekend than to know who'd scored a third base at the party.
     
    For this I am really grateful. I had all the time in the world to be a child. I played crazy games, did amazingly stupid things, experienced so much as a child, I look back and think how richly filled my life was with the things we all wish for.
     
    Don't get me wrong, we weren't wealthy, my parents were hard working class people. We didn't have a television till I was in my teens. We only had one car in a family of seven. But as a family we did stuff together. We looked out for each other. We weren't massively close, but close enough.
     
    Those days were critical in establishing who I am today. The adventures and experiences I had back then taught me to be the man I became. I tried things, experimented. Maybe not in the same way the youth do today, but I had the chance to try the things I wanted to experience, I got to choose what I wanted to do. Through those choices I have been able to do and experience some pretty amazing things as a person. I've seen and done some remarkable things. Would I ever have done them if I didn't have the childhood I did? I don't think so.
     
    I listened to a program on the radio in the car today. In the program they were talking to two young people here in the UK who last year took part in a new government initiative to give places to tens of thousands of young people to get involved in Voluntary Community Outreach Programs. The youth get to take part in a variety of team building exercises and design their own community program to impact their local area.
     
    The thing that struck me listening to both young people was when they both spoke about their frustration at the lack of things for young people to do today. That is so sad. It breaks my heart that a whole generation of young people are forced to grow up before their time. Society has changed I accept that, but is it right to watch as a sixteen year old struggles with life decisions that are confusing enough for an adult who's somewhat more experienced and is maybe more equipped to deal with these complexities. Twelve year olds smoking, and fifteen year olds binge drinking? That's not right surely?
     
    I know that if you were to ask a young person, they would promptly want to be treated as a more responsible person and given the freedom to choose, but from my own personal perspective I'd much rather go back to those care free days I enjoyed as a young teenager, than face the daily challenge of being an adult, and I guess that can only come from the experience of growing up. Do we not as adults have a responsibility to allow our youth to be youth and give them a chance to just be kids?
     
    If there is one thing that I can pass on to the young of today it would be to say this. Don't grow up too fast. Treasure the precious days of your youth. Be wild, be outrageous, paint the town red, and enjoy every single moment that you can. There will be ups and downs, challenges and rewards, mistakes and choices, changes, friends, relationships, heartbreak, love, discovery, adventure and so much more. Don't dwell on the things you have no control over, and try everything you can. Enjoy yourself and be good to yourself. Believe in you and love who and what you are. Your special, unique and important. Challenge and be challenged. Be all you can be every day and never forget to do today what you shouldn't put off till tomorrow, for tomorrow may never come.
     
    Thought for today - "Lord grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." - Prayer of Serenity by Rhienhold Neibhur
     
    Song for today - Shining Light by Ash [media=]
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  3. Yettie One
    I read a blog recently discussing a gay man's response to sex with a woman. I've read a story on GA about a man who finally finds the strength to accept he's gay after 20 odd years of marriage. I've been asked about being gay by youngsters I know. I've been chatting with a friend on GA about sexuality and what they think it means for them.
     
    If there is one thing I've realised in 38 years of my life it's that sexuality is no simple thing.
     
    Personally I'd consider myself gay. Ok so this is pretty simple to state right? Yes it is. I've been attracted to men since god know's when. Hell I think the doctor delivering me probably looked really cute come to think of it.
     

     
    Having said that, I have once in my life been head over heals in love with a girl. Yes, me, that sexually sure person fell for someone of the opposite sex. Admittedly she was rather 'butch' and looked very much like a handsome man, but she was all woman with a kid.
     
    I met her through a woman i was working for. She was very friendly with the boss, and had been through one hell of a life. Now there was attraction there right away on a visual basis, so I guess I took the time to probe to find out more. At the time, it was popular to congregate outside the door of the club I worked at to smoke, and naturally there was always a doorman stood there observing what was going on.
     
    This gave me the opportunity to get to know the woman in question. She'd had one hell of a life growing up, and was facing some pretty serious criminal charges. I used to stand and listen to her talk about her fears and woes, and emotionally it tugged at my heart. She'd given up her kid as a young mother, and was now regretting the decision. There were a lot of really large issues, and she needed someone to be there for her. Her girlfriend at the time didn't seem interested in what she was going through.
     
    Unknown to her, I decided to be there for her. On the first day of her court case, I went convinced my boss to accompany me to the court room. and if you could have seen the look on her face when she turned and saw us there for her.
     
    Afterwards, we became really close and over the course of a year or so, I can honestly say I really fell hard. She had a dream to join the army, and together we worked on that, getting her into peak fitness, and then working through an amazing support worker to get her an opportunity to become a dog handler in the British Army.
     
    In 2006 she was posted to Afghan, and returned after six months, and was then posted back out there several months later. After two tours, she returned to the UK a different person. Withdrawn and quiet, dealing with things I can relate to in some ways. I don't know what horror's she faced, but war had affected her, and slowly we drifted apart.
     
    I've had my relationships through my life, loved and lost. Yeah I'm sorry it didn't work out, but there is a part of me that wonders if I'd really have been able to stay committed to a 'straight' relationship long term?
     
    It's an interesting question and one I'm not sure I have the answer for.
     
    It's funny, I said to my friend yesterday that I don't think I could ever perform sexually with a woman. But I was sexually attracted to her. I would gladly have slept with her, made love, kissed her, had even thought for the first time in my life of having a kid.
     
    So what, does this make me Bi?
     
    No I don't think so. Part of the reason I was attracted in the first instance was based on her looks being similar to a man.
     
    A young man I became really friendly with in Wales approached me one day to talk about the whole gay, straight, bi conundrum. He was all confused and was asking my advice. It was something I promptly withdrew from, as if there is one thing that I think leads to the worst kind of uncertainty its listening to someone else's advice when your trying to discover your own sexual identity.
     
    I know I'm not the only gay man that puzzles the whole sex with a woman thing, and wonders about exactly what is what. I know there are even some of us that are brave enough to give it a go, and like the young blogger who found the courage to overcome his inhibitions and give it a go, often we only find more uncertainty instead of the assurance we hoped we'd find.
     
    Sexuality is one hell of a complex thing, it's a part of human life that we try to understand, but fail miserably to get. There are people who claim to be sexual consultants or relationship experts. Hmmmm, sorry but for me love, emotions and the power of sex is just a little too diverse and difficult to be able to fully comprehend. I sometimes wonder is it really so important to put a finger on our sexuality. Wouldn't it just be easier to accept that we can meet, fall in love with and get along with anyone? Who cares if your really gay, straight or bi? If only that were possible ey?
     
    I guess I've just learnt to enjoy the experience and let my heart tell me what is right and best for me at any specific time. What do you think/do?
     
    Thought for today - "I have to trust what I do and then do it!" - Ednita Nazario
     
    Song for today - Set Fire to the Rain by Craig Colton
  4. Yettie One
    So what is it about attraction? To be fair I think if we each made an effort to answer this question, it'd be pretty interesting to see the differences for each of us.
     
    Lets not just consider the basic principles of attraction ie. looks or personality, but actually drill down to think about the specifics of what it is that we consider to be the things that make us stop and take a closer look.
     
    I've often thought about this, as to be honest, if I go onto a website full of an array of men, and were to choose ten men that I considered good looking, they'd all appear totally different.
     
    It's strange to me sometimes when I stop to consider what it is about looks that means I think of someone as being attractive. I've also noticed it largely depends on my mood at the time I am looking. I've found that people I've thought 'Yes' to today, when I might have been looking through rosy coloured glasses considering I was in a more 'frisky' mood, becomes a very definite 'no go' the following day when I check him out under normal circumstances.
     
    I guess the real truth is that while looks certainly do play a huge part in attraction, there is so much more to attraction and then you really need to consider exactly what it is that you want out of the person your admiring.
     
    As a general rule there are some trends that I've begun to notice. While they do play a major part in what I predominantly consider attractive, they are most certainly not exclusive as there is an exception to every rule.
     
    Some of the things that I really go for you might consider a little strange, but then these are the things I look for in a guy so hey, wind your neck in! After all, I'm sure if you really thought about it, you'd have a couple of strange one's yourself.
     
    Ok. One of the biggest things that seems to get my attention very quickly is thick, dark eyebrows. I'm not talking about a mono brow, but I do mean a wide, manly eye brow. I do not tend to go for plucked, neat eyebrows, although there are some good looking men who do have shaped eyebrows.
     
    I like fairly long dark hair as a rule. Blondes while cute are not really the first thing I'd go for, however there are some stunning beautiful blonde men. But predominantly I've always gone for thick dark haired men.
     
    I love a tanned or olive skin. There is just something so sexy and healthy about a good tan on the skin. Maybe this is from my African heritage, but the white pastiness of a life in the colder regions looks dull too me.
     
    Within the world of Gay Sex I'm what you'd call a Pitcher or a Top generally. I've been known to be versatile, but only for someone very special. So from that point of view, I'm not really worried much by what hangs between a man's legs, but more alert to what minces behind him. I can hear you all rather indignantly telling me you "Don't Mince".
     
    One of my favourite lines out of a movie is said by Nicolas Cage and taken from the film Face Off. He says to one of the air hostesses on a flight, "I love peaches. I could eat a peach for hours." It's no wonder then that I have a thing for a lovely peachy bum! Nah let's be honest, some guys really have a nice rear end, and there is nothing better than thinking about what i'd do with.................
     
    I've never really been into muscle. It just doesn't do it for me. I like a guy to have a bit of meat about them, ie. not to be too skinny. Probably what most people would call average build.
     
    So those are the more specific things that I tend to look more closely for. Yes eyes, smile, height, style, are things I do take heed of, but are not of major importance in my ideal man.
     
    Character wise............
    Hell how long is a piece of string?
     
    There are some things that really make a man stand out from the crowd though.
     
    I love a 'cheeky chappie'! There is nothing better than a whitty nature, banter with someone that likes to tease and 'come back' at you with cleaver talk. This is the kind of person that I can bounce off of well.
     
    I also like a talker. As a fairly quite, probably shy guy, I'm not the kind that will make the first move, nor speak without being spoken too, especially in the first instance. Partly as a result of the way I was brought up, partly due to a lack of self confidence. I've always struggled to say anything to someone that I fancy.
     
    And that is pretty much the main things that I look for in a man.
     
    Does that make me picky? Probably! I mean they are rather specific pointers, but to be fair, I'm not sure that I've ever found anyone that's had all of them in one go. We tend to settle for what comes along, and adapt to suit the circumstances of each relationship we form.
     
    I'd really be interested to know what things you look for. Not the basics though, take a bit of time to think about the specifics.
     
    We all want a man who's honest, magnanimous, loyal, loving, romantic....etc, etc, etc...
     
    Thanks for reading.
     
    Thought for today - "Sticks and stones are hard on bones; Aimed with angry art. Words can sting like anything; But silence breaks the heart." - Phyllis McGinley from The Ballad of Lost Objects 1954.
     
    Song for today - Time to Pretend by MGMT [media=]
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  5. Yettie One
    I've lived in the UK for a number of years now, and one of the things that's amazed me about this tiny Island in the sea is the number of people and accents that are packed onto it.
     
    To name but a few you'd easily think of the likes of the Cockney's, Scousers, Geordies, Mancunians, the Cornish, the Welsh the Irish or the Scots.
     
    Yet even within the more commonly known regional accents, there are more local dialects or variances of these, and it can get really confusing to say the least.
     
    In addition to these accents, various areas have their own chosen expressions, terms of endearment or ways of greeting that for a foreigner can lead to some rather amusing and interesting situations.
     
    Allow me to share a few of my own adventures from the last thirteen years here in the UK with you.
     
    When I first came to the UK in 1999, I ended up in Basingstoke on my way to the coast, where I was forced to stop and get a job to cover my expenses. I got a job in security and topped that up with a job in a local pub called the White Heart.
     
    I'd only been in the country for a few weeks, and my exposure to variations in accent was litterally non existent. So when a customer came into the bar, I moved over to serve him and he said to me, "Can I have a Cork please."
     
    Now obviously I was somewhat puzzled, so I asked him to repeat his order, and he confirmed again to me that he wanted a "Cork".
     
    Mystified, but assuming it could have been for some kind of pub/drinking game or weird prank I disappeared into the back, retrieved a cork from the bin and brought it through to the customer.
     
    I placed the cork on the bar in front of him and looked at him with a smile. The customer just looked at me with a blank expression and then asked, "Are you trying to take the Mickey mate?"
     
    "I beg your pardon," I asked.
     
    "Is this meant to be funny?" the customer asked very dead pan while looking intently at me. The strange look on my face must have given away my confusion as he proceeded to say, "I want a pint of Coke (said Cork in his accent) not a fucking Cork!"
     
    Well my eyes nearly popped out of my head, and I rapidly made to pour the young man a pint of coke while apologising profusely. This is one cock up behind the bar that I've never been able to escape.
     
    Once when I was driving back from a meeting up north, I stopped at a service station in Birmingham which falls in the Midlands of the UK. I filled up the car with petrol and went in to pay. I got myself a sandwich and a coke and went to the till where a middle aged lady rang everything up and proceeded to tell me, "That'll be thirty two fifty please Duck."
     
    I recall just staring at the woman wondering to myself, "Did she just call me Duck?" "What the hell did she just call me Duck for?"
     
    Again my expression must have concerned the poor woman as she looked at me and asked in the most genuine voice, "Are you alright Duck?"
     
    Well, sorry to the poor lady but I just burst out laughing. She must have thought I was high on speed or something, she took my payment, shaking her head and muttering under her breath. I was later to learn that Duck is a fairly common saying in the Midlands.
     
    When we moved to Wales, I accompanied my mother and father to the bank to have all our details changed on our correspondence and the like. I'll never forget going into the bank that day, the three of us approaching the teller's window together, my mom in the middle, my father and myself either side as we listened to the young lady behind the counter rattle off something to us in a thick Welsh accent, tongue moving at ninety miles an hour.
     
    Anyone who's ever been to Wales can attest to the speed at which the local's talk, and so my mother stood there with a blank expression on her face. So once more the young lady rattled off what ever it was that she was trying to communicate to us. Once more my mother looked at her in uncertainty, and which point my father elbowed my mom gently in the ribs saying, "Honey I think she's talking to you."
     
    My mothers reply? "I know she's talking to me Mike, but I can't understand a bloody word she's saying!"
     
    I nearly died!
     
    Another common saying among the younger more rough and ready lads in Wales is to call each other Butt. Now I've learnt this is a shortened form of the name Butty Boy which was a common nick name for a young boy when he joined the miners in the coal mines in South Wales.
     
    I'm sure you can imagine the confusion when one night, while when working on the door of a night club as a doorman I chose to refuse entry to a rather intoxicated young man. In bitter disappointment the guy decided to remonstrate with me about my decision.
     
    "You, know something, I'm really disappointed with you Butt. (pause) (I'm waiting for the but...) Actually, to be fair, I think your well out of line Butt." The young man is now looking at me awaiting my response, I'm waiting for him to continue from the but....
     
    Eventually in irritation I asked him, "But what?"
     
    He looked at me like I was the class clown and says, "What do you mean Butt?"
     
    And so it went on till the lad I was working with on the door could barely stand he was laughing so hard. Completely exasperated with the drunk I eventually convinced him to leave, not without the proverbial Butt being mentioned at least another ten times, much to my irritation.
     
    I did get a giggle out of it though when Ben explained it to me.
     
    But my favourite one of all has to be about a year ago when I moved to Yorkshire. Now I've worked in the pub and night club industry for most of my life in one way or another. I actually moved up to Yorkshire to run a pub in Mexborough, a town in South Yorkshire.
     
    Anyway, as it happened the one day I was training a friend of mine how to use a new alarm system in the pub which was located inside the kitchen just off the bar.
     
    An elderly gentleman came into the bar and ordered a pint of bitter which I poured and he paid me with a ten pound note. As I was getting his change I glanced up at Joe to see him about to set the alarm off. I rushed into the kitchen and stopped him with the customers change still in my hand.
     
    When I came back into the bar the old man was watching me closely, and I was watching Joe closely.
     
    "Where is my change Cock?" the old boy asked me.
     
    Now initially I was distracted so I turned to look at the man wondering to myself if I'd heard correctly. I raised my eyebrows and looked at the man.
     
    "You got my change Cock?" the man asked me again.
     
    This time I'd heard correctly, and to be honest, in many ways I'm glad that the guy was an elderly gentleman because I'm quite sure that delayed my reaction slightly, but still, my heckles were up that a complete stranger who didn't know me from Adam, had just walked into my pub and had the audacity to call me a Cock!
     
    "I beg your pardon." I asked, rather pointedly to which the old man replied, "I paid you with a ten pound note Cock. Where is my change?"
     
    Now I was getting ready to tell the old guy to wind his neck in and leave. Thankfully, Joe had heard the tone of my voice when I spoke to the man, and as good friend's knew enough to pay attention, so when he heard the man call me Cock yet again, he came straight over to us. He would tell me later that he'd seen it all painted across my face.
     
    He rushed over and spoke to the man, "I'm sure the boss hasn't forgotten your change sir."
     
    I turned to look at him, my eyes wide, generally a look I give when I'm telling someone to back off I'm dealing with this.
     
    "Leave it, its fine," Joe whispered to me.
     
    "You what?" I hissed at him. "He's just called me a Cock three times."
     
    Joe giggled, and by now I've realised that when someone starts laughing when I'm unsure about something that maybe, just maybe I've got the wrong end of the stick.
     
    Joe dragged me into the kitchen where he proceeded to tell me that it is a common Yorkshire expression to call someone Cocker or use the shortened version of Cock, when addressing someone who's name you might not know.
     
    I've never quite understood how Yorkshire people can happily accept Cock as a common expression in their local lingo, but I have to be honest, it is really quite nice when your serving someone you don't particularly like to be able to say, "Thank you Cock," and not necessarily have meant it in the way he's assumed you did.

     
    I know that we all have expressions that mean something else completely wherever you are around the world. When I first moved here, Dope was a fairly common South African expression to mean Good. If you liked something it was said to be "Dope", however, that expression didn't work quite so well here in the UK, where everyone thought I was asking for pot all the time.
     
    We used to call a good friend Oak, or a big lad Ox. Again things that go completely over the head of anyone here in Britain. We called traffic signals in Zimbabwe Robots. So when your giving directions to someone you say, "Go down the road until you come to the robots and turn left." Imagine the confusion on an English man's face when you give him these same instructions.
     
    Ah well, I knew what I was saying.
     
    What funny sayings and stuff have you come across?
     
    Thought for today - "After climbing a great hill, one finds that there are many more hills to climb." - Nelson Mandela
     
    Song for today - Paradise by Coldplay [media=]
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  6. Yettie One

    Life's Moments

    By Yettie One,

    I've never been a massive fan of shopping, especially grocery shopping.
     
    Unlike my father who would spend hours reading labels and checking out the special deals, I like to get in and get out. I've never been one for waiting around. Mr Impatient maybe. Well in certain situations, alright I admit, Mr Impatient is a glove that fits rather well.
     
    I had reason to visit Tesco's this morning to get some batteries, and while I was wondering around I decided to get me some new rope. Ah huh, rope....
     
    Now I won't go into what the rope is for, it could be what your thinking, or it may be something completely different. You can just put that vivid imagination down to your dirty mind!
     
    haha
     
    But all the same, it got me to thinking as I was wondering around the store how lazy we have become. Everything, absolutely everything is available in a Tesco's these days. There was paint, fridges, TV's, DVD, game stations, stuff for your car, stuff for your bedroom, crumbs even stuff for the toilet, and I'm not talking about air freshener and bleach!
     
    Everything under one roof. Forget about going shop to shop, meeting people, walking from one end of the town to the other just to get a weeks shop done. No today we walk in with a trolly and walk out with everything we'll need, without barely talking to anyone.
     
    It is kind of the same with mobile phones. I can remember a time when you wanted to know how your friend was, you got up and visited them. Today I've seen people sat next to each other in a pub texting each other.
     
    And facebook.....
     
    Don't even get me started on social media. It's easier to have a good old heart to heart online than it is to do it face to face.
     
    I know I am just as guilty of these things I point out. I spend far too much time worrying about facebook, twitter and mobile bloody phones.
     
    Don't get me wrong, I've met some lovely people online, and have a number of amazing friends dotted around the world that I've never met. In that way the net has broadened my mind and opened the world to me in a good way.
     
    But I do wonder what all this convenience is doing to our social skills as a race long term. In 50 or 100 years, what will we be like. Will communication involve a key board and screen, some weird kind of memory chip or something else more outlandish? Will we evolve to having no voice box or ability for producing sounds?
     
    Far fetched? I don't know but wondering around Tesco's this morning my imagination started to play games with me, and it had nothing to do with the rope!
     
    lol
    Hope you have a lovely day and thanks for reading.
     
    Thought for today - "A life spent making mistakes is not only more honourable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing." - George Bernard Shaw
     
    Song for today - Life by Des'ree
  7. Yettie One

    Teach 'em Young

    By Yettie One,

    I was lucky to at a very young age have been thrown into the wonderful world of Middle Earth as my eldest brother chose to read me first The Hobbit and then Lord of the Rings.
     
    Immersed into a world of fantasy like none other I was entranced by the words, inspired by the imagination and transfixed by the genius of Tolkien. For a seven year old lad hearing the words of these stories roll off my brothers tongue as he read to me each evening was my candy fix for the day. I remember rushing home from playing next door, knowing that it was time for him to sit and read with me before bath time.
     
    I may well have been too young to read those stories on my own, but taking the time to introduce me to the world of the power of the written word, and the imagination of a great author kindled in me what would become a passion for written works.
     
    This is something I truly believe is the fundamental bedrock of learning, and developing an inquisitive nature. Our imagination is nurtured and stimulated through stories. We learn to create, communicate and shape our understanding and use of language.
     
    I am dismayed at the decline of this interest in books and the works of literature among the youth of today, and I can't help wonder if a part of this decline is as a result of our own lack of encouraging our kids to read more.
     
    Our lives are caught up in working, providing, earning, shopping, feeding and clothing our kids, that when it comes to spending quality time with them, all too often we are too tired, or can't be bothered to make that effort. In my own experience I honestly believe that without my brothers time and effort, I'd not have the passion for books that I do today.
     
    Is it the time we take to pass on that interest in story telling that gives birth to an appreciation for literary work? I tend to think so yes.
     
    We all come into contact with youngsters. Our nephews and nieces. Our sons and daughters. On camp at church, watching a game. When you can encourage them, Spend a moment in time and pass along that special thing we all share in the excitement of a gripping novel.
     
    Thought for today - "Books are the most quiet yet most constant friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counsellors, and the most patient of teachers." - Charles W Eliot.
     
    Song for today - Your Guardian Angel - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
  8. Yettie One
    Sometimes I find myself angry at the world for making life so damn difficult. Then at other times I get irked at the fact that what should be the simplest of tasks is made into a mountain of confusion.
     
    But when I stop to ponder and give consideration of the ups and downs of life I am given reason to think that realistically, its these ups and downs that make life interesting. Without them we'd live an easy, boring existence.
     
    Think about it. You get a task to do. It is repetitive and simplistic and after the shortest time you have mastered the requirements to complete the task with your eyes closed.
     
    That task is no longer interesting to you. It is boring and becomes a target of your desire to be more stimulated in life. We get angry and frustrated as each day we have to consider returning to our menial existence carrying out this mundane and repetitive operation.
     
    So why then, when something comes along that tests us and puts a difficult. maybe dangerous or even life threatening risk in our way, are we so eager to complain and react negatively?
     
    You want to know what I think? Meh, ok, you probably don't as you possibly have got your own opinion, but tough, this is my rant about the world, so I'm going to make my point.
    *sticks out tongue*
     
    Hmmmm How very mature Yettie.
    haha
     
    No seriously though, I'm coming to realise that we look at the negative in life far too much. We see the bad or the difficulty in everything.
     
    Remember a bad shopping experience? I bet you can list at least ten or twelve of them, in detail. Ok, how many good ones do you remember in the same amount of detail?
     
    Our bad memories are clear and vivid and the subject of our nightmares. Yet our good memories are worn round the edges and fuzzy. I can't say I have dreams associated with good memories all that often.
     
    So it is any wonder that with all this negativity in life that we don't see the opportunity that tough times present to us? Can we really be so blind as to not see the chances we have when challenge comes knocking on our door?
     
    Maybe today its time to stop and think, just for a moment about the things we could achieve if we really changed our attitude and outlook on the important things in life. Let's stop worrying so much about the things we can't change and concentrate on the things we can. Maybe what I'm really saying is that this is something I'm beginning realise applies as much to me as to each of you.
     
    Thought for today - "Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known." - Garrison Keillor
     
    Song for today - Tracey Chapman - Fast Car
  9. Yettie One
    I guess I grew up in a time and place where the stereo typical trend was to bring up a tough, strong and independent lad, one that easily stood on his own two feet.
     
    I can neither say this is a right or a wrong method of bringing up a child, I am no expert on raising kids, but I can say that in my own circumstances it taught me to bottle a lot up, taught me to keep a lid on my emotions , how to hide my thoughts and feelings and I'm pretty sure now looking back that this is not a very healthy thing to do.
     
    Keeping stuff hidden, being too stubborn to seek help to deal with stuff is not such a wise way of living. We are not built or equipped with the knowledge or mental tools to deal with some of the stuff life will throw at us, and when we don't seek to deal with these things, when we choose to just bury them instead of confronting them and working them out, when we choose to find solutions to problems on our own we fall into a trap of isolation.
     
    When you hide behind this outward image of strength, the typical macho man who is not shaken by anything, and this is an image you've portrayed for years past, it becomes really difficult to suddenly allow yourself to display a weakness, a vulnerability. It's as though you are admitting to the world your not quite the man it thought you were.
     
    Is this a human flaw, or is this a trap that society has created? Expectation set in a mould that possibly is neither healthy nor conducive to the development of a balanced individual?
     
    Maybe it's ok for men to show a softer, gentle, compassionate side. Maybe it is ok to be emotional. Hey maybe it is even alright to shed a tear every now and then.
     
    I have found that peoples perception of the male of our kind vary from place to place, culture to culture, and as generations become more adept at accepting the complexities of our make up as human beings.
     
    That is not such a bad thing. I hope that future generations of men never have to face the uncertainty or isolation of creating a self image of being too strong for your own good. I pray that the men of tomorrow are allowed to be the kind of man they really are and not bullied into being the kind of man a society imagines he should be.
     
    Thought for today - "He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened" - Lao Tzu
     
    Song for today - Lifted by The Lighthouse Family [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWMoeQR1LJ8[/media]
  10. Yettie One
    How many times a day are you told that your special?
     
    You know something, its not something we share with people very much. We pass each other, often as silent ships sailing through the night, never stopping to say how much we care, not taking the time to make our feelings known.
     
    For most of us putting into words things that are difficult to utter is not easy. We are naturally shy creatures, wrapped up in learning to survive, understanding emotion, feelings, and striving to heal life's hurts, and hide the scars.
     
    It's easy to keep our most private thoughts hidden. It's too common to say nothing and regret later the things we never got to say.
     
    So this day, if you have chosen to read this, please hear me say.... You may never speak to me. You may never know me. You may not hear me say these words, but they are true. They are from my heart, and they are just for you.
     
    YOU ARE SPECIAL. YOU ARE LOVED. YOU ARE NEEDED.
     
    Song for today - Welcome Home by Radical Face
  11. Yettie One
    Well, I've taken some time out from the regular daily grind over Christmas to spend some time focusing on reading that I've been wanting to do for ages.
     
    I also used the break to dedicate some really much needed time to writing, and chapters for my latest adventure continue to take form and roll off the press as it were, something I'm really chuft about, as I've been waiting to get this one of the ground for ages.
     
    I got to do a full rewrite on my anthology entry, which I've been told by my editor was far to soppy and flowery, I think that is possibly a part of who I am as a writer, and I have yet to learn that it is all about show not tell. To be fair, I understand this concept and appreciate the impact that it has on a story, yet it is not something simple to achieve when I sit down to write. Maybe this is something that comes with time?
     
    I finally got to the end of Circumnavigation, or rather to the last chapter posted, which considering it's 145 chapters in, took a lot longer than I was expecting. A few times in the story I'd considered giving up on it, but one of the things that I hate is reading something and leaving it hanging in the air unless it is just too terrible to continue with. In this case, it was not that the story is in any way terrible, just very long winded.
     
    There is much intense drama in the story, and I guess that if you are one who has followed it as it has unfolded, then maybe it does not have the impact that reading the same story in one chunk would have, but after more than a hundred chapters, I've had about all I can take of the protagonist's ability to survive anything it would seem, some of it amazingly well thought out, yet some of it too far fetched to fathom.
     
    The thing that made me hop up and down a bit was to get to chapter 145 and realise the story is not yet completed. I don't know what the heck made me think it was, maybe just the sheer number of chapters in the story, but for some reason I'd assumed that it was a complete work and so that kind of settled it for me when I was looking for something to read.
     
    See I like to be able to read, enjoy, and reach a completed resolution in my mind, rather than have to sit waiting for it to come along when the writer can get around to it. I'm an impatient so and so, you only have to ask Hamish to know what I mean.
     
    One thing that struck me while I was reading the story was a sudden outburst, a rant if you will from the writer C James in one of the later chapters of the story, where he kind of implies that if people don't review his work or take part in the forum discussion, that he'd stop posting and leave the story unresolved. This got me thinking. I know what it is like as a writer to see people reading and suddenly begin to wonder why you are not getting the feedback we all crave.
     
    "Is it me?" "Is it my writing?" "Am I really that bad?" It's called insecurities. One thing I have come to learn on GA is that like many sites, it has an active core of people that intermingle and mix, and a lot of what I can only describe as ghost visitors. No disrespect meant to them, they are as important and critical as the noisy core of the site, it is just that they are more reserved in their willingness to participate openly for whatever reason.
     
    I am a fairly open person. I don't really care who knows me, or what they think of me. It is the few that I allow into my close perimeter of friends that I give concern to. For that matter, I have never really cared who knows of me or sees me for who I am online. Maybe this is foolish, as there are far too many people willing to take advantage of this and could easily use it against me if they chose, but I am of the opinion we only live once, and this is what living is for me. The online world is a fundamental part of my life and who I am, so I take risks and make choices others consider foolish. Take my brother for example. He won't even buy from Amazon for fear of having his details cloned. I respect that. He has his opinion and impression of the world online, and while we have discussed and debated it, I am able to accept that if it were a person like my brother reading something I'd written, then he'd most certainly not be leaving a comment or feedback, no matter how much the story moved him.
     
    Another thing I have noticed is that friends online are very loyal and we gather around each other and support each other. Now some people are better at interacting across a large divide of people, but if you are like me, you love to talk to everyone, you just don't let too many of them get too close. Hurt is a funny thing, and once bitten, twice shy the saying goes. In my case this is very much a reality of how I choose who to trust and let in to my ring of close friends.
     
    Having said that, there is a level of anonymity online that means I can be a lot bolder with allowing people near me, as there is less of a risk of the immense loss a faded friendship can have on you emotionally as a person. Friends online come and go as circumstances change around them, like ships in the night, near for a while, then gone into the shadows. See that I can deal with. It is the physical attachment and I hate to lose in friendship.
     
    I guess what I am trying to say is that we should expect to find little cliques. They are part of the fabric of humanity. They happen in every walk of life, and so when I see them happening here on GA it is not surprising, nor should it bother anyone. We all still talk to each other. Although I may not be part of someone's clique, they may still at some time read my stuff, or comment on a thought or update. I may message them and chat for a bit when we are in the chat room at the same time. That is life. So when I let my insecurities get in the way of something I actually really enjoy doing, then I feel that I am the one worse off for it.
     
    There is always a lot of encouragement on GA to engage, interact or feedback, and I do support that. However feedback in many ways is a two way thing. We want to know, or at least feel that our thoughts and opinion matter. So when your feedback is not always responded too, it is easy to wonder off else where and find something else to entertain your time.
     
    Look, feedback is the life blood of any writer. We love to hear it, love to get it, crave it and cherish it. Fact. We are all slightly vain in that way, there is nothing wrong with admitting it. But the thing that really disappointed me about the whole rant was the idea that for a reader such as myself, who has come along at a date many moons after this saga began, and has trundled through dozens of chapters, thousands of words, millions of characters, and suddenly read that because you have not participated in a forum that may well no longer be active, or ceased to leave comments as they are not replied too, you may have the ending of the story withheld from you, is a bitter pill to swallow. I really was disappointed when I read the rant. Not so much the reason for the outburst, but more the guise of blackmail that it appeared to throw over the whole work. It was a shame.
     
    I would like to think that I give credit to C James for the effort and hard work that has gone into a remarkable story, and I suppose that after such a long adventure it is difficult to remain motivated when the enthusiasm wares off. But is that possibly the risk of a massively long project? People do get bored, other things grab at our attention, and even though I sat and tried to read it in one consistent go, I got sidetracked a few times.
     
    It was really interesting for me to sit and think it through. I do like a long story, I've read a couple on GA now, and admire the writers that can achieve it, but it does make me wonder, unless doing it for the love of the story and your own passion for writing, Is It Worth It?
     
    Thought for today - "The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand." - Vince Lombardi
     
    Song for today - Wishful Thinking by China Crisis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjCWiG5Yw7U
  12. Yettie One

    Sagging Saggers

    By Yettie One,

    So it is a special day apparently. I wish someone had told my dentist that! The side of my face feels like it's had a punch Mike Tyson would be proud of! I guess it is my own fault for not asking for a different date, but I'd rather get it bloody done and dusted to be honest.
     
    I am pretty lucky in that we have a really cool dentist in the next village, and they fuss over their patients and really are rather nice, so it makes the whole experience rather nice. For this reason they are a really busy practice, and there are always a load of people there when I visit. Today was not much different, and I was sat in the waiting room with a number of adults, a fair few elderly folk, a mom and baby, and one or two around my own age. Most were busy reading this or that, or checking out the posters on the wall. I sat there wondering what I would do today, and pretty much decided that I'd write a blog, considering it's meant to be a special day and all that! Just what to write about now....
     
    Then it happened. A rather stunning looking young gentleman, maybe around 23, walked into the waiting area, dressed in rather trendy modern fashion. As is the case with an awful lot of the youth today, his trousers were just about around his ankles, and his rather ample, tight, delicious looking bum was tightly wrapped in a pair of royal blue boxer briefs, leaving next to nothing to the imagination. I automatically tutted to myself, I mean what is the world coming to, when you go to your local dentist and there is a young man doing everything he can to turn everyone on! I mean I did sit there thinking to myself, "Damn dude, if you really have to let your jeans sag that low, you may as well leave the bloody things at home and just walk around in your jocks!!!" Not that I'd be complaining in this instance!
     
    But it did make me chuckle to myself watching the reaction around the surgery. Remember the time when a 'Builders Bum' was a rather unsightly thing to observe, and most people would politely look away, and attempt to hide their embarrassment or disdain. However, now it is all proudly worn on display for the whole world to see, crack and all.
     
    The result is really quite dangerous for the gay man. I mean, there are occasions, where the person that becomes the target of one's attention is dressed in some form of sporting gear, say for example the modern form of track suit bottoms that are common with the younger generation here in the UK. Right now at this time, the trend is for these to be made of a light cotton like material with no inner lining that is common with a comparable nylon pair of 'trackie' pants. Put this together with the trend to leave one's trackies sagging low, added to the fact that certain bulges and shapes become rather obvious through the flimsy thin fabric, the dangerous result for a typical horny gay man is that lamp posts, bollards, and other pedestrians along the sidewalk become very inconvenient obstacles to avoid while completely distracted and on the move.
     
    Another result of the sagging mentality is that most men are at last beginning to understand that a good looking pair of underwear is an asset, and a powerful tool in the 'turn on', 'turn off' department. As a person that has always had an appreciation of the male form, clad only in a good looking and rather suggestive pair of underwear, I can honestly say that I am rather satisfied that the trend of sagging has at last woken mankind up to the importance of hot underwear.
     
    But more than anything, I decided to see what I could find in relation to the topic of sagging before I wrote this blog, just to make sure that I was using the right terminologies, and not making a complete fool of myself, and came across this article which outlines possibly one of the most absurd laws I think I have discovered to date. I mean I can understand that for some it is rather offensive, but let's be honest, we are perfectly happy to sit on a beach and watch scantily clad people frollick around with everything on display. Women can freely walk around inner cities with boob tubes and other various items of clothing that leave very little to the imagination while there boobies are proudly on display, so when the tax payers money is being wasted to "Return Manliness" to Michigan, I do shake my head in wonder. Come on world, men are just showing off what they got!
     



    To all of you that have sent birthday messages, thank you so much for your kindness and nice words. I appreciate it no end, and love you all.
     
    Thought for today - "You can't leave footprints in the sands of time by sitting on your butt. And who wants to leave butt prints in the sands of time?" - Bob Moawad
     
    Song for today - Princess of China by Rhianna and Coldplay
  13. Yettie One
    I'm often amazed at how much I don't know. There is always something new and exciting to read, to learn, to experience.
     
    I've had a travel bug for a number of years now, and as a matter of principle do not like to do much in the way of planning or preparation. Spontaneity I believe is very much a spice of life, and a good dose of variety without planning or expectation is a healthy way to keep life interesting and fun.
     
    In this way, I have enjoyed some really amazing trips, mainly around the UK which I now call home, but once in a while further afield. The trouble with travel abroad is that there is a certain amount of preparation that you have to undertake regardless of your intentions, so for this purpose travel to distant places is not always as effective.
     
    But its simple enough to at random times jump in a car and take a drive. Such trips have ended me up in the likes of John O'Groats, Lands End, Blackpool, Belfast, Aberdeen, Skegness, Brighton, Birmingham, Manchester, Glasgow, London, just to name a few.
     
    I am also fairly lucky in that I have a friend who is much the same, and will get a random call from Ashley intermittently asking where we will end up that night!
     
    Recently I have discovered a fascination with British Castles. I visited one in York recently and the whole sense of history surrounding me was unreal. I was inspired, and moved at the same time. To think I was standing in halls where knights and kings had once been, where men and women had supped and laughed, cried and mourned.
     
    It was an amazing sense of humbleness. I kind of felt like I had to respect the place, and take care to be considerate to the lives of those who'd made it possible for me to know stand in this place and marvel at the construction, the majestic aura of the site, and the spectacle of witnessing a part of history up close and personal.
     
    I had the opportunity a number of years ago to attend an event hosted by the Lorien Trust LRP Society, called 'The Gathering'. It is held once a year in Derbyshire and attracts several thousand role playing fans from all over Europe. A four day event held over the August bank holiday it is a whole lot of fun, as various tasks, games and role play events culminate in a massive battle which takes place on the final day.
     
    I was amazed at the quality of some of the kit that these players have, authentic battle wear, all carefully made using safe products to ensure it complies with health and safety regulations. Latex swords of every kind, axes, daggers, shields, helmets, full body armour. You name it someone's made it.
     
    I've kind of made up my mind this year to once more don my kilt and join the Clan of the Bears and see how much it has changed since I last visited the event. I also want to consume copious amounts of Meed again. Yep that's right, authentic British meed made with honey. Oh man. *dreams*
     
    Hang over in store I am sure.
     
    But I guess what I am trying to say is that no matter where you are in this world, we are surrounded by the most amazing things that all too often we fail to see. It's as if we can't see the splinters for the sawdust.
     
    Stop for a moment, have a good think and this summer try and discover something new and completely exciting in your neck of the woods, and let me know how you go.
     
    Thought for today - "Happiness is not a destination, it is a manner of travelling. Happiness is not an end in itself; it is a by product of working, playing, loving and living" - Haim Ginott
     
    Song for today - So Young by The Corrs [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0n2V8YouPhg[/media]
  14. Yettie One
    As an avid fan of TV Police drama, I am blessed to live where possibly the very finest range and class of dramatical television drama is produced.
     
    Undoubtedly, with series like Taggart, Lewis, Vera, Dalziel & Pascoe, Juliet Bravo, Law & Order UK, Luther, Midsomer Murders, Mersey Beat, Murder City, Rebus, Spooks, Sherlock, Silent Witness, The Commander, Waking the Dead, Wire in the Blood, are just some of the many modern British Police Drama's we enjoy on our screen's at various times through they year.
     
    I am sure that there are many more that I have not listed, which you will share with me, and all this without even dipping into the vault of the UK's established long running iconic police shows. The likes of Morse, Frost, The Bill and so many others.
     
    Yes there are programs from other countries that I find entertaining, and enjoy to watch. The hugely successful US version of Law and Order especially the Special Victims Unit series is good entertainment. Then you have the likes of CSI.
     
    But when it comes to true drama, real grit, tough emotional stories with action and acting that makes your heart beat stop in a moment, and race like a mad man in the next, I'm sorry but no one is able to do it was well as the British.
     
    The entertainment industry in the UK have created an institution of excellence, an example to television directors and producers around the world, on how to create a real dramatical masterpiece. And I am lucky enough to live right smack bang in the middle of this great stuff.
     
    Oh man, spoilt for choice or what?
     
    Yes it is such fun to be able to curl up on the couch with a nice whisky on the rocks and get lost in the thick imagination and intrigue of a clever plot, never really quite knowing who done it, right till that last second when the penny drops, and you realise how simple and clear the signals were all along.
     
    How I wish my imagination worked that well, to create and write such a vivid and imaginative whirlwind of chaos, mystery and diabolical human crime.
     
    Don't ask me to choose one as my favourite, I love them all, but if I am completely honest, I have a huge soft spot for the Governor in the modern Taggart, DCI Matt Burke played by Alex Norton. I'm not even really sure why other than something between his character and I clicks.
     
    But that is the beauty of a masterful script. The characters draw you in, interact with you without ever meeting you, and build a report with them despite never sharing a word. That to me is the power of a dynamic script in the hands of a master performer, something common in British Police Drama.
     
    So if I was to ask you. which is your favourite police drama? What what character do you enjoy watching the most?
     
    Thought for today - "If you want to be loved, be loveable" - Ovid
     
    Song for today - Clouds by Newton Faulkner http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=52iTtpnPgbw&feature=g-logo
  15. Yettie One
    Thank God for Vitamin D.
     
    I love the hot summer days, when you can walk down the road and everyone is looking rosy cheeked and awfully sexy as they take off their shirts and walk bare chested towards you.
     
    It's an excuse to perv long and hard at the glorious examples of humanity around us.
     
    Ahem
     
    Sorry, just being honest. LOL. Don't tell me you don't window shop during the summer, when its all out there on display. Of course we do, it'd be almost wrong not too!
     
    But seriously though, while the heat can be oppressive, and the over done tan can be painful, it is all good things about the summer that for a moment hide away the dark, depressing days of winter and give us strength to survive another year.
     
    I've read and I think there must be some merit in the fact that the sunshine does us good. Maybe when its so hot that it fries a few too many brain cells its not that great, but all in all, its being able to take out the BBQ, spend time with mates out in the garden, venture into cool forests and go on long walks in the bright, fresh air. It's actually feeling warm enough to consider dipping a toe into the angry looking Atlantic, which despite the heat surrounding us is still bloody cold.
     
    I learn to live again in summer. Maybe this is a Yettie thing, and I've just forgotten how to successfully hibernate through the winter. But whatever it is, I glad its here.
     
    Thought for today - "Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it the more it will elude you. But if you turn your attention to other things, it comes and sits softly on your shoulder." - Henry David Thoreau
     
    Song for today - This is the Life by Amy MacDonald
  16. Yettie One
    I was thinking to myself as I lay in bed this morning, listening to some music sent to me for consideration for our station, how lucky we really are to have music in our lives.
     
    As part of my therapy I've been tasked with focusing on the good things in our lives, the things we can and should be grateful for, and my choice for today is Music.
     
    I greatly admire and respect anyone that has musical ability, not only because I tend to scare people off when I try to string a few notes together, but more so because of their ability to move and enhance our lives in special, meaningful and dynamic ways.
     
    I only have to think about the music from my favourite band Keane to know that it makes me feel good and strikes a special accord with me. The beauty of music is that there is something there for everyone.
     
    I've learnt working with music in my daily life how important it is to each of us. Try if you will imagine a world without music. It would be lifeless, morbid and difficult to bare. I'd even be so bold as to say there would be little reason to live without music.
     
    Maybe that is being overly dramatic, but think about how much music impacts on our everyday lives. It is intertwined with our thoughts, our memories, our emotions, our happiness. It makes special moments more powerful, breaths life into boredom, gives hope in dark times, entertains and inspires our mind, oh and so much more.
     
    So for today, my happy thought is about this thing which is such a constant in my life, and which helps me to cope with the ups and the downs each and every day.
     
    Thought for today - "I think music in itself is healing. It is an explosive expression of humanity. It's something we are all touched by. No matter what culture or creed we come from, we all love music." Billy Joel
     
    Song for today - Stop for a Minute - Keane -
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