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Yettie One

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  1. Yettie One

    Dreams

    By Yettie One,

    I started writing a blog yesterday, but abandoned it as it started to get far too dark and depressing to be something I felt comfortable sharing with the world. In some ways it was reflective of my mood, in other ways it was me lashing out verbally at life.
     
    I enjoy being able to write in that way. For me it is a channel that I use to vent my pent up feelings, order my thoughts, and write down some of the things that are too difficult to say or speak out loud. I guess in this case I ended up writing for me, and while it could have been shared and exposed some really very personal feelings and ideas I have, it served more purpose as a means for me to be able to look over things I can't really deal with right now.
     
    But I did want to blog about something at least. It's been a hard week, and writing is a wonderful escape to get lost in something I love doing and share with those that read, something I consider worthy of discussion. So I got me to thinking, and I decided I was going to blog about a dream I had this week.
     
    Dreams. Oh what wonderful things. I am referring to the mysterious occurrences that are pleasant, not the nightmares of horrorville, the night terrors of fantasy fiction. No, no. These are the wonderful experiences, great tales of spectacular adventures, unrealistic events, and people that have been embedded into our psyche in some measure.
     
    Now at my age, the erotic kind of dream that is more prevalent in the days of our youth is not a common denominator of my world of night time visions, however it seemed that this week, time made up for its absence by granting me a dream that was not just about one person, but three. Imagine that. A threesome that would have been four if you included me in the addition, almost like a row of buses. That age old adage, you spend hours waiting for one, then three come along at the same time.
     
    Unfortunately the dream was not some great big sexual orgy where four characters of my imagination all tangled together in a confusion of flesh and sexual extravagance Nay, it was a lot more sensible and civilised than that. It actually took me back to my younger days, a time when I was more carefree and willing to take a risk. Or was I?
     
    The first person I came across in my dream, I know I came across, as it is the first time I have ever dreamt of this guy in my life, yet he is one of those people that was a key determining factor in my exploration of sexuality and the acceptance that it was men that I preferred.
     
    For the purposes of this blog I will refer to the man as Character X. The sad thing I have to admit is that the exact circumstances of the dream at this time are sketchy and I am not completely sure what we did or why, however I do know that we tangled together, as I recall feeling intensely satisfied in my dream that I'd chosen so well, as he was indeed damn good under the sheets. So while the details of our sexual encounter are not clear, I know that sex was on the menu at that stage of the dream, and that I suppose must be due to the fact that this is the one character of my dream that I actually did have sexual intercourse with in real life.
     
    What was wonderful was too see Character X in life like motion, just as I remember him in my minds eye, clear as the day we spent chatting about everything and nothing. Vivid is not really the word. In my dream, I could feel him, smell him, hear him. It was sublime and fantastical to once more look into those eyes, and see that smile.
     
    This portion of my dream took up considerable time, and I am miffed that I can't remember more of the details of that encounter, but as the dream moved on, the following two encounters are clear in my mind.
     
    At this stage of the dream, I am part of a team of underground coal miners, way back in the days of picks and shovels, long hard days of toil and labour underground, and playing just as hard above ground. As a youthful teen, I am part of the workforce that in those days did not shy away from including child labour, and as such there is a large group of us mid teenage boys.
     
    Now I am not sure how plausible it would be to find a group of boys allowed to enter the pub after a long working day, but this is where I find myself at this stage of the dream. Actually I guess it is more of a working men's club or community hall in which we all congregate and down a pint or three, and it while I am enjoying the ice cold refreshment of a beer that one of my earliest crushes enters the frame. None other than Sean Austin, a hunky rather cute young man that takes a particular interest in me, is really chatty and shares my drink. At some point in the discussion, he leans over and kisses me, another implausibility as in that day and age I am certain that open displays of two men kissing were not an acceptable part of society, however this was my dream, and it lead along its own path.
     
    Damnit, I tell you, if I'd known that Sean Austin could kiss that bloody well, I'd have moved to the USA in a heart beat and made every effort known to man to meet and convert the man to our homosexual way of life. Having said that, it was a wonderful experience, even if it was in the confines of my slumbering mind, to sample those lips, and fulfil that youthful desire to spend but a moment with the man of my teenage desires.
     
    It was only a kiss at that moment of the dream, but oh what a kiss to have had. The dream moves on at this stage, and I find myself in the same era of time, returning somewhat drunk to the place where I rent a room. It just so happens that the room I rent is in a brothel and the landlady's son is a guy that I had a major crush on when I was in my early 20's. One of those typical gay man loves straight man stories, but in my dream, I return to my room, undress for bed and suddenly find that this person enters my room, and promptly undresses and proceeds to join me in bed. Suddenly that wonderful chill of nerves that strikes you the first time you get to be with someone you have desired and wanted for a while overtook me, and it was as if I was a crazy young virgin about to engage in my first sexual experience. The tension in my muscles, the dry mouth, the roaming eyes. OMG does he have a beautiful ass.
     
    He climbs into bed, and it is really quite strange, but I just lie there as he grinds himself into me, touching, exploring and boy do I enjoy the sensations. However it is his bum that is the centre of my attention. The feel of it when it touches me, when he is sitting on me looking down on me, when my hand holds him as he lies beside me panting. That perfect, oh so wonderful mound of his body is the clearest memory I have from this whole dream, and it has left me in the most heightened sexual tension all week since, as whenever I close my eyes, I can only be see this wonderfully perfect image of a man I so wish I'd seen in that state for real. And then....... and then. His mom calls him. Argh. He has to dress and leave my room, and the dream moves on, back to the dark dank mine.
     
    I am not sure in dreams having a meaning, I've never really believed in all that stuff, but heck I'd be interested to find out what all that was meant to mean. Three in one night, and an erotic dream I have not really been familiar with since the days of my teens. Hmmmmmm, I am not complaining at all, I wish I explored my mind a bit more frequently like that, but I can't help but wonder what prompts our dreams and the direction they take. I wish I could remember more of the initial part of my dream too. Why is it that we forget the important stuff so damn fast? lol
     
    Well whatever the reasons, I am glad I had the dream, and figured that heck it was worth sharing. It is good to for a moment take my mind off other matters, smile and think of something nice. Hope you are having a great weekend everyone. Hugs to you all.
     
    Thought for today - "Always desire to learn something useful" - Sophocles
     
    Song for today - Hey Ho by the Lumineers
  2. Yettie One

    Fittest Looking Men

    By Yettie One,

    I was chatting with a young DJ that I am working with today about travel, and the delights of getting to explore our world a little at a time. While we were talking Rob asked me where I thought the best looking people in the world lived, and I couldn't answer. It got me thinking and I have to admit, it is a really intriguing question.
     
    I suppose that the answer to this question is subjective as each of us has different tastes, sees attraction on a different level, and will each be looking for quirks that other people will consider strange or slightly weird. But that is all well and good, as it means that there is someone there for everyone, and beauty is certainly in the eye of the beholder, so in a way it is a good thing that we can all rest easy in that somewhere out there a soul mate awaits us all.
     
    But I have to be honest, the more I've thought about it today, the more I had to say that while there are stunning examples of great looking people in every place I have visited, there are definitely some places that have a larger proportion of good looking men than other places.
     
    Ok so yeah, I am zeroing in on the male of our species. Awwww are you surprised!
     
    I have been lucky to have visited a good number of places. Not everywhere sadly, my tour of this world continues a little at a time, but of the places I have visited, one place stands out as having the largest population of damn fit men!
     
    But before I share with you the place I reckon has the most stunning looking men among its population, let me talk of some of the places that I have managed to enjoy a good few hotties strolling past.
     
    The 'Gay Scene' in Holland was amazing. Although I can't really say that the guys I was admiring were Dutch, as it is such a diverse cosmopolitan society in Amsterdam, that I was very possibly drooling over men from every nation around the world. But for a great night out in the one of the finest cities in Europe, with enough eye candy to last a life time, Amsterdam is it.
     
    There is something about the Irish that I can't quite put a finger on. I think it is their accent. Actually I am pretty certain that it is their accent. They say the language of love is French, well I am convinced the language of lust has an Irish accent. I can definitely say that on each of the four times I have visited Ireland, I have always been smitten by the beauty of an Irish man talking in a broad Irish drawl. Having said that, the one unattractive thing I found, especially in Dublin was a drunk Irish man slurring in a broad Irish drawl.
     
    I was lucky to live in Wales for seven years, and would love to move back down that way someday. If there is one thing I loved about the country, it was the Welsh men. The Welsh get a lot of stick here in the UK, they are often regarded as the underdogs of the four British Unions. However, as much as they are teased, they have the looks that the rest of the British Isles lack, and that is a fact. Welsh men are hot, simple as that. I can't say too much about the accent, it sounds like they are singing all the time, but put a Welsh man in rugby shorts, and put him on the rugby pitch and I'll swoon all day long.
     
    But even the Welsh don't compare to the men of the nation that had me dribbling at the lip. I Have been lucky to visit this country on a good many occasion and I guess one city more than any stood out as the home of the perfect male. Looks wise this is now, I am referring to the most shallow of attractions, the beauty of sight, the attraction of appearance, the desire of the flesh. And for this and this alone, the one country that in my opinion has the highest concentration of hot men, of course reminding you all I am speaking of countries that I have had the joy of visiting. South Africa.
     
    No No I am not being Biased. I am simply stating a fact. And it is my opinion after all.
     
    If there is one place that you DO NOT want to visit in a tight skimpy speedo as a gay man, it is the beach in Cape Town. I am telling you now, regardless of age, regardless of your taste, regardless of your style, you will swoon and develop a stiffness in your lower regions. It is inevitable.
     
    I visited Cape Town a number of times as a lad, and it was in Cape Town that I guess I can really first recall realising that it was men that I fancied. You see, I guess I must have been around 13 or 14 on one of our family trips south, and I'd been bought a camera for the first time in my life. I had ventured down to the beach on my own one afternoon to see what I could snap. A sea gull caught my attention as being really tame and came so close to me, so I just sat watching it waiting for an opportunity to snap a picture of it.
     
    It was during this time that I became aware of a guy, probably about 18 or 19 sat back by the sea wall with an older man. What stood out initially to me was his white speedo against his dark tanned skin. But as I studied him more, I began to realise that he was perfectly stunning. Dark hair, stunning bright eyes, perfect body, and the tightest, skimpiest thin speedo that showed off a package I suddenly decided I'd happily explore all night long. The sea gull abruptly became a decoy I used to fake appearances of taking an artistic picture, while my new target became the bronzed god I'd fallen in lust with.
     
    That was kind of my awakening to the male form, and my attraction to it. Later, when I was closer to 16 we once more visited Cape Town, and I recall struggling to spend any time off my belly when I was on the beach, as I had the unfortunate problem of being physically stimulated every time yet another handsome man strolled past with all sorts proudly on display. For a closeted young gay boy it was murder, but oh so nice.
     
    In some ways I wish I'd visited Cape Town when I was older and more willing to accept my status as a gay man. But one day it is my dream to maybe retire there, so I can live in hope hey!
     
    Now I am sure that everyone will have their own paradise story, or place where the honey and milk is drawn from the highest concentration of good looking people, but for me right now, that place is South Africa, and in specific Cape Town. Just one thing, while they look oh so lovely, I can't say the same for the South African Dutch accent that I can for the Irish.
     
    There is one other thing that I would like to add to these thoughts. Admittedly there are a load of places I have not been to, and I am sure that as I continue to explore this wonderful world of ours, that I may indeed discover as I suspect, that there are places that have just as good if not a higher concentration of beautiful men for me to ooogle. Some of the Eastern Bloc countries and Australia spring to mind.
     
    Thought for today - "Values are not trendy items that are casually traded in." - Ellen Goodman
     
    Song for today - More than a Feeling by Boston
  3. Yettie One
    So we got to sit and watch the Pride of Britain Awards yesterday. It is something that I have always admired in a way, but tend to wonder how it is that they could possibly make those choices. See I'd want to give that award to everyone that does something special, and heck there are many people that reach out and do remarkable and unusual things.
     
    The judging panel is made up of pretty remarkable people in our society already, a panel chosen by the chief sponsor of the event, the Daily Mirror. I would hate to sit on that panel. How do you decide between who to honour and who to ignore? That process of choosing must be one of the toughest decisions to have to make as an individual seeking out the people that are going to stand before the nation and be honoured for their contribution to our society.
     
    It got me thinking. I wondered through the halls of my memories and began to wonder, if I was made to choose, who out of all the people that have touched my life would I want to honour as someone pretty damn special? How would I go about working out who makes it to the short list in the first place, and then what criteria would I focus in on to set one aside from another.
     
    I am really at a bit of a loss on this one, but as hard as it is to try single out someone, I did become aware of some people that have made a massive impact on my life, and touched me in ways that I had not really fully given an adequate appreciation too until I began this little mental exercises.
     
    I am not here to name names, or point fingers, but I do think it is worth mentioning what each of these have done for me in my time here on earth. Their contribution has been invaluable, profound, and I guess is for me, made of those things that I set out to find when I first asked myself this question.
     
    The first person I'd pay tribute to was a childhood friend that grew up almost at my side. For me, the colour of a persons skin has never been an issue, and I was lucky to grow up in a region of the world that had begun to work out its differences in terms of the prejudices towards skin colour and race. This meant that I was able to grow up with a best mate that was an African lad, a guy that lived next door to our family, and someone that just clicked with me. His older brother and mom were lovely people too boot, and for what must have been close on a decade we were inseparable. What is it about this person that is so profound to me? One simple thing, regardless of who I was, what society suggested I should be, forget pre-conceived perceptions which dictated what someone should feel, he accepted me as me, colour, creed and racial preclusions aside. For me, that friendship was the founding blocks of my view on the world at large, and gave me the ability and tools to look beyond prejudice, see through discrimination and gave me an unwavering sense of fairness and equality between me and my fellow man. I will be eternally grateful for those lessons, and even though we have now lost touch, this persons impact on my life lives on through the loyal friendship he gave me in those important formulative years.
     
    I quickly had to wipe out family members from this process, or I would quite simply have just gone on and on about two very special people to have touched my life in the form of my mom and dad. While I do not wish to trivialise their contribution to my life, it would be unfair to choose them in this instance, so I looked beyond my immediate family members.
     
    However, there is someone within my family circle that really should get special mention. He is a cousin several times removed, and although we only really met in the last ten or so years, he and I have formed a relationship that has had its ups and downs, (we are both stubborn, independently minded people, who love to make our point) yet we are still as close today as we have always been. He is the first person in my family that I openly came out to, and one of only two that know of my homosexuality within the family. Yet in all of that he has never once judged me or thought ill of me for it. He is loyal and loving, has a heart of gold, and such a cheeky personality that I cannot help but adore him for it. He is living in the Middle East, and has met someone that he really loves, and has recently informed his folks of this fact. However, part of this revelation is that this particular person is a man. In a family that I have always considered as modern, accepting and strong, his parents have abruptly and savagely cut him off, yet through it all, as much as I know he is hurting inside, he has stood strong, accepted their decision and moved on with his life. I cannot for the life of me fathom their decision, yet I cannot help but admire and love my cousin even more for his ability to rise above, and remain resolute and strong even in the face of one of the most devastating social errs I could ever imagine.
     
    Cancer is a blight on our world. It is cruel, mean and my god is it heartless. It destroys lives, causes the most horrific suffering and is a scourge of the human race. You may have guessed from these statements that I have no love for this killer. Indeed in the last decade it has ripped a hole right through the centre of my family, and taken people I love in horrible ways. In my life I've had to deal with death on a variety of fronts. Suicide, short, sharp and abrupt. It leaves you with questions you'll never have answers too for the rest of your life, and a guilt that you never quite shake. Murder, just as traumatic in its suddenness and devastating in its aftermath as you seek answers, justice and try in vain to deal with the loss. But all of these pale in comparison with watching someone that you love waste away and know there is nothing you can do to stop it or halt it. Death will come, slowly, in agony, and rob you every day of a little more of the precious person that you love. I recently met a young guy that looked beyond my age, saw beyond the distance, was not bothered by my dark view of the world, didn't care about the normal things other people seem to worry about in getting to know people. He just simply accepted me, reached out to me, and shared with me at a time in my life when I really needed someone to just simply be there.
     
    It might sound crazy, but that simple attentiveness, the lack of big words or fancy speeches the friendship offered regardless of circumstances or perceptions made me reach out far quicker and in a much deeper way that I ever would have normally. Desperate? Yeah! Needy? Yeah! Heck I was at a place in my life where I needed someone that cared and understood, and along he came and plopped himself at the fire in front of my lonely cave and he just listened. So I rapidly became attached to his companionship, and love to hear from him, and chat with him, only to hear he is gravely ill, and it is the cursed blight of cancer that holds him.
     
    I can't truly describe my anger at the world. There are no real words for the pain and hurt I feel. But this is me, my selfish need, my personal pain. It is my desire that is paramount, not to loose another person I love to this epic curse. I have seen it reek havoc with my sister, my niece my mother and it bloody took my father. Enough Already!
     
    Yet, as much as it hurts me, I watch this beautiful young man wake up every day and fight a good fight. He smiles at the world, cherishes every moment, has such a remarkable and gentle caring nature and only wants to enjoy his time here on earth. He deserves so much more. He is a symbol of everything I wish I was. Selfless, alive, happy. He faces the most scary thing in his young life with a smile on his face and a cheerful demeanour. I admire, respect and love him for it, it is through his strength that I struggle on against my own issues, and I am struck by the fact that despite the huge weight of this thing on his shoulders, he has enough time and love and character to carry both of us, and all those around him, through. If that isn't remarkable and special, I don't know what is.
     
    I was not really sure I wanted to share this, but then if I am making time to honour people that have made an impact on my life, I could not leave this next person out. I hope that you can appreciate him as I see him, and understand my reasons for choosing him.
     
    I moved to the UK 13 years ago now, from an African country in serious political strife. I arrived here with little money in my pocket, alone, and basically had to start a life for myself from scratch. It has been a long process and there have been an awful lot of downs, as well as some amazing ups.
     
    In the first few years that I lived here, I was alone, and in this time I struggled a lot with loneliness. It is one of the issues of being a Yettie, I am not really that great at meeting people or making friends. I find I can talk to anyone, but in that process of formulating binding friendships and relationships, I have big issues with trust and rejection.
     
    In those early years, I was very much a loner, and one day someone suggested I should consider getting a pen pal. It was an idea I did give a lot of consideration too, and after spending weeks trawling the internet looking at various different sites, I came across a profile of a guy that made me decide that he was going to be the one I'd try writing too. For the purposes of this blog I am going to use my pen pal's nickname.
     
    Chuggles is not your normal pen pal. Indeed, he is not really what many people would consider a very nice guy. He is rough around the edges, has a mean side to him, and he is on death row. Yes that is right, you read correctly. You see, I actually found Chuggles' profile on a Prison Pen Pals site. I am not sure how I ended up there, but if you go online and search for pen pals, there are hundreds of sites, and I spent ages looking for someone to stand out. His profile was pretty simple really, it just said, "A guy who made a pretty big mistake in life. I don't expect forgiveness, I just want someone to give me a chance."
     
    I don't know, I guess as a foreigner in a new country, trying to establish and prove myself, those words just spoke to me. So I took a chance. Those first six months were a problem. His replies would be filled with sarcasm be short and obscure, never answered anything, but asked an awful lot. He was an angry young man who'd been abandoned and isolated. Don't get me wrong, Chuggles is where he is because of choices he made, and he understands this very well, as well as knows that I understand it too.
     
    But in time, I guess my persistence paid off, and I kinda broke through. What I got to discover was a guy who as a teenager, struggling with a drug problem had made a bad decision and found himself in a world of pain as a result of someone else's choices. A boy that all too late woke up to the fact that actions have consequences, friendships have effects, and decisions can be so terribly wrong just as easily as right. I became a person, willing to listen without judgement, willing to talk without lying, willing to say the hard stuff as well as the easy stuff, and over the years we have established a friendship based entirely on paper, but something that I treasure all the same.
     
    The thing that speaks most to me about this guy, is that after all this time locked in a tiny cell for up to twenty three hours a day, waiting for his day to die, he is alive. His mind is beautiful, quirky, happy. His imagination is unreal. He is funny and serious. He is human. And above all, he has grown up. He just needed a chance to be himself, and out of all that anger, hurt, pain and evil, a wonderful individual is there. He knows he will pay for his decisions and actions and in a way he seems to have accepted that. However, in the time he has, he lives as much as he can, and I find that remarkable. His strength of character has inspired me often. His ability to see beyond his limitations is special, and through his words, one day I hope to be able to tell the world that even when you make the very worst kind of mistake, there is a reason to see beyond the red.
     
    I guess I have learnt in thinking today, that we all have people we will disagree with. People we will intensely dislike, people that we will never see as attractive or special or deserving of our time. But everyone has someone. We are all there for some person that everyone else has given up on. Someone alone and hurting. We can't be everything to everyone, but we can be something to someone. I hope that in sharing these special people that have touched my life, I can encourage you to think about those that touch your life, and never forget to let them know how very important and special they are.
     
    Thought for today - "Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is by far the best ending for one." - Oscar Wilde
     
    Song for today - Souls by Taylor Ames
  4. Yettie One
    Ok so a bit of a break form the norm for me today, I am going to write something that is probably a little bit of a rant, a little bit controversial, and you will probably all be telling me that it is down to personal taste, but still, I'm going to vent about it anyway.
     
    Late last night, a little bored, perhaps a little frisky, and being a full blooded male, i sort out some interesting porn and chose to be entertained by some on screen antics for a while!!!!
     
    Shock, horror, the Yettie Watches Porn!!!!!!!!!!! To right, it is entertaining, can be amusing, and serves its purpose. Don't judge me too quickly, I'm sure you've checked it out once or twice.
     
    Anyway, my rant is not so much about the quality of the porn, as it is in a trend among males today, that I just fail to understand, and completely do NOT see the point in.
     
    Shaving one's junk!!!!!!!
     
    Ok, that is about 70% of the current male population up on the defensive already. I shave because it's clean! It makes my junk look bigger! I shave coz it's neater and looks nice.
     
    Erm sorry, that's a load of crap!
     
    In the particular track I chose to watch last night, there was a really cute twink, probably in his early 20's with really dark hair and pail skin. Now as you would expect, he's a guy and got body hair, however, this particular young man was in some way a distant relative as he was hairy galore. Haha, Yettie Style hairy we are talking people!
     
    So the video is running, and eventually the inevitable happens, and his underpants are slipped off below his hips, and almost immediately I was presented with a lilly white patch of skin surrounded by a dense jungle of hairiness maybe three inches anywhere from the proudly attentive manhood and bits on display. It looked ODD.
     
    But this was not all. When he was spun over onto his stomach, after a very good going over one might add, there was a landing strip of paleness all the way up his beautiful buttocks, which if it didn't look odd on the other side, just looks plain ridiculous on this side.
     
    So I ask myself, what is this crazy rage at the moment of removing natural body hair?
     
    I have heard many reasons given over the years, and I am sorry, none of it makes any sense. To be completely honest, I really find it quite disturbing, and I shall explain why in a bit. But first let us examine some of the variety of excuses I've come across.
     
    1. It looks better.
    A completely hairless crotch looks better? Sorry I quite think that the contrast of hairiness between the skin of the man's crotch and the pubes that nestle it, actually works quite well. If anything it makes it stand out more. But ok, I guess that this can largely be interpreted as a matter of opinion on this excuse.
     
    2. It feels better.
    Well this just makes me laugh. When I was a younger I had a serious incident and was hospitalised for a number of weeks. While in surgery I was shaved down there, and over the next two to three weeks as my pubic hair regrew, I had this uncontrollable itch I simply could not ignore. Now this is something I've heard from a number of guys who shave regularly too. When they leave it a bit too long, the itch is there and is mega irritating. So causing an itch feels better?
    Next point would have to be that as a man, I am all to familiar with that 5 o'clock shadow we talk about on the face, and let's be honest we've all done some considerable kissing action in our lives at some stage, and when you smoosh up against a stubbled lips, your own lips can get pretty raw with the action. Now personally, I am really not too keen when engaging in some sneaky oral activity to get a stubble rash from contact with a prickly crotch. No, thank you very much.
    Lastly, if you are a man and you shave, we all know that the inevitable slip of the hand, the slice of the razor, the sting of the cut. Oh My Gawsh! This is one pain I can quite honestly say I don't want anywhere near my downstairs bits thanks. I mean I can dab a bit of aftershave on my face and let it calm down, but down there? I really don't get the whole point of putting the crown jewels at risk of a mortal injury just to feel better. But then again this is just me.
     
    3. It's cleaner!
    Well sorry if this is the case, shave your head, your face (including your eyebrows and eye lashes), your arms, your legs, your chest, oh yeah, and your back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Have you never heard of soap?
    It has been serving the masses very well for the last 2000 years, now suddenly we want to shave our junk because it's cleaner? Does this suggest that when you bath, you wash everything BUT your junk????
    Get real!!!!!!
     
    4. It makes my bits look bigger!!!!
    Ahem. Are you that insecure that you desperately need to make it APPEAR to be another 2 millimetres bigger? I'm not even sure that the removal of the hairy bits is going to show off your inadequacy any better!
    I mean, come on, lets be logical here. A man naturally is hairy, so the removal of the hair is not going to enhance its appearance. If anything at all, all it serves to do is make it appear as if the junk may have come off the body of a pre pubescent male of the species, and that my friends is defiantly NOT making it look a single minuscule bit bigger!!!
     
    These are just some of the reasons I've heard thrown about to lend support to the trend of shaving one's bits.
     
    But really, let us be completely honest here, why would we be so obsessed with appearing hairless? We grow up, we get older, we go grey, we gain wrinkles, we get fat. The list is endless. This image of eternal youth has gone squew-if!
     
    We inject poison into your body to stop wrinkles and end up causing our upper lips to become immobile when speaking or laughing and look totally friken weird. (Simon Cowell a perfect example) We insert silicone breasts into our anatomy and then cause a national health scare when it is discovered some unscrupulous supplier has been using industrial grade silicone to make the blasted inserts. (PIP Implant scare) We go under the knife so frequently for this tuck and that tighten that we end up looking as scary as Joycelyn Wildenstien. (excessive cosmetic surgery) It is bloomin scary!!!!!
     
    That is not to say that shaving your body is anywhere near as serious in its potential dangers, but still, what is its purpose?
     
    Thing is, I think it is a phase. It is just one of the crazy things we think is cool right now, and so we partake in it. Women get bikini waxes and stuff, so it is cool for the beauty conscious male to pay attention to the neither regions too.
     
    Ok granted it is a thing of choice. But pause for a moment and consider this. In a world fixated with looking younger, does shaving our body really give out the right message? We expect a young lad to be hairless. To have the innocence and beauty of naivety and a carefree world to explore and grow and learn in, before the pressures and confusion of sexuality and hormones and emotions makes life chaos. So when I see an older person craving for that appearance of youth, it troubles me. Maybe this is due to a heightened sense of awareness. We hear on our news every day right now of the most prolific serial sex offender ever to have existed in the UK, and I cannot help but ponder how it happened.
     
    This is a pretty evil world in which we live, and while I am not suggesting that simply shaving your bits is indicative of anything sinister, I do think that in some ways it is just not right. Society changes, evolves and adopts new habits, norms and trends. However, not all of them are for the right reasons, or sensible choices. I know a lot of people may very well disagree with me, and I do not wish to cause offence, but this is my blog and my point of view, so while I can accept you do as you please, please also accept that I can speak of what I think. This is not me pointing a finger or making an accusation, it is simply me musing how very different and weird the world I live in today is from the one I grew up in as a lad.
     
    Thought for today - "I've been dating since I was 15. I am exhausted! Where is he?" - Kirstin Davis
     
    Song for today - My Kind of Love by Emeli Sandé

  5. Yettie One

    A Kick Out Of Writing

    By Yettie One,

    It has been a while since I have done any writing, I have been working on a variety of other things for my job, my company, my responsibilities, and of course doing a lot of ground work on my brand new work, the story I hope one day blows people away.
     
    Ah heck I can but dream. but to be honest I do like the idea, and the guy that is helping me with the research for the book is really amazing, and has some wild stories to tell. He's made a small fortune as an escort and is such a nice person beneath it all, it was not what I expected to find at all.
     
    So maybe my book takes on a slightly different version of its central character as a result.
    Hmmmm Interesting times.
     
    But anyway, that is not the purpose of this blog tonight.
     
    I finally parked my butt down and decided I must make an effort on working on my Mayan End of World Anthology entry.
     
    When I first saw the topic I was inspired. I don't know why, because if I am really honest I am not into all the hollywood catastrophic end of the world stuff.
     
    But still, I figured I'd give it a good crack of the whip, and so tonight sat down to give it a spin. Well I am rather pleased with myself, even if I dare to say so myself. I didn't really know how I was going to work the story, I only had a mild concept of the tangent that my story would follow, and really wasn't sure how I would develop the central characters that I wanted to fit into the story.
     
    But I just sat and let the words flow, and wow did they flow. It must have been a lack of writing time or some sub conscious desire to get back into the writing world or whatever, but wow, it just appeared on the paper, and that is something that has NEVER happened to me before.
     
    I am normally fairly methodical in my writing in that I formulate a beginning and an end. I work on the plot then develop the main character. Then it is just a matter of adding the meat to the bones and filling out the plan, but this time around there was none of that. I found it really interesting too, as I found a kind of freedom in writing this way. The story grew with my excitement, and while I am not completely satisfied yet, the main theme is solid.
     
    It got me wondering how other people attack their writing. Is it common to just sit and write freely and let the story take you along its own path, or if more like me you tend to follow a conciousness line of preparation before tackling the story?
     
    I guess it would largely depend on the story line. A short story that doesn't have to worry about continuity and content too much would be much easier to just write freely, but a novel or long story really does need some kind of planning, even if it is just a trail of who is who in the scheme of things.
     
    I know there are loads of seasoned veterans here who write a lot of stuff, and I am sure that everyone has their own tricks that work for them, but I find that I really do have to push to get through a long work. I mean I only have one work up on here in terms of a long story so far, and it was one that I just put up as I went along, it's not reworked, edited or anything. I mainly put it up as a test to see if I could actually get through a whole long story, and much as expected, I hit a hurdle where I discovered that I had lost myself in the middle of the plot where I had not really prepared the track of the story so well.
     
    I found I hit a place where I struggled to move the story from where it stood to where it needed to go to fit with the route the plot takes.
    So dead end!
    I guess it is something that I can always come back to, but it did make me wake up and realise that I really should finish something before I start posting it.
    So let me ask you, for those of you that are massive fans of reading, do you prefer to read something complete, or do you quite enjoy being kept waiting for the next instalment of a story?
    And also to all you writers out there, when you come across a block in a story, how do you get past it?
     
    Thought for today - "Carry out a random act of kindness, without expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that some day someone may do the same for you." - Princess Diana
     
    Song for today - Payphone by Maroon 5
  6. Yettie One

    A Thought For You.

    By Yettie One,

    For me personally, the last two weeks have been a quietly controlled spell of manic activity in the bigger scheme of things. For a while, I have been locked down in a world of woe, wondering what tomorrow will hold and when the inevitable is going to happen.
     
    It is never a pleasant feeling, knowing that you are headed for a world of pain, and there is nothing that you can do to avoid it, side step it, or even really prepare yourself for it. These are facts of life, nature in all of its cruel splendour, the things we have no control over, pain, sadness and sorrow that there is no words for, no proper way to describe, no real effective means of communication.
     
    What is lovely about being busy is the fact that my mind has little time to ponder these circumstances. I have thrived over the last two weeks, not only from the personal fulfilment of a long time desire, but also from the satisfaction of feeling productive, needed, back in control of something. It may sound stupid, but being able to make decisions, being allowed to make a contribution, being involved as a working part of the dynamic is a strangely rewarding and liberating feeling.
     
    In some ways I am ashamed to admit these words. Regret that I feel this way. Feel bad that I like to feel alive and part of something that I can influence, control and manage. The feelings of uselessness are abated the frustration of having to sit and watch, unable to change the course of nature is soul destroying and only depresses the mind, body and spirit. There is only so much that one person can handle, and when we are faced with things we cannot affect, we are not only completely out of control of destiny, but also out of control of our feelings and abilities to deal with what is happening around us, this is when we find ourselves at our lowest. This is when we are vulnerable, exposed, out of our comfort zone, alone!
     
    I know what tomorrow holds for me. Maybe not in the physical sense of tomorrow, the day after today, but I know what is coming in my near future, and as I struggle to prepare myself for this eventuality I have begun to realise that I am totally incapable of preparing myself. I do not have the skills or the experience to know how I am going to handle the things I will have to face. I know not, where I will find the strength to do the things I will have to do. I cannot begin to plan for it, do not want to face it, cannot accept that it is necessary.
     
    Yet, this is my lot. This is the reality of my situation, and so be it. I begin to understand too, that while I am not in a place or frame of mind to really be able to cope with these things, I am in some ways starting to plan for these times. While focusing my mind on things to keep my busy right now is in keeping with my trend of burying my head in the sand and pretending I do not have to deal with these things, in so many ways the things I am engaging in right now are the foundations of my preparation for life beyond my current situation in life.
     
    Networks and friendships I am forging with people who understand, care, love without condition and share without expectation are the corner blocks of setting up a life line, a safety cord that I can reach out and hold in the dark times ahead. There is a sense of relief in knowing that someone, anyone will be there. Loneliness is a curse that no one wishes to meet. It is one that far too many of us live with, accept and embrace. It is a bitter pill that swallows us! I don't want to feel alone, and I know that you don't want to feel its embrace either, so when a simple post card drops through my letter box, the person that took the time to write it can never know how special the words scrawled across the white surface mean to me.
     
    When a short and simple message pops up in my message box saying here is a random hug for you, on a day I was just thinking about you, the writer of that message can never truly know how much the words enclosed in that missive sent through the marvel of the internet really means to me.
     
    The cheerful banter in a chat room, the laughs we share on skype... The stories that I manage to get lost in, the encouragement through comments, feedback, conversation..... It all adds up. And I don't think we really give full credit to the power of these simple actions we undertake on a day to day basis. You are reading this thinking, "heck, maybe he is right," or maybe you are not, but did you stop and realise while you are reading this, just how special YOU really are?
     
    No? Well take it from me, in my eyes each one of you that make the effort to be a friend are so much more than you allow yourself credit for. It is people like you that make the world spin. You give life meaning, bring a sense of purpose to survival, and without realising it give value to the things, relationships, actions we each undertake, that we become a part of, that we live for daily.
     
    Those things that have kept me busy for the last two weeks, gave me cause to sit and think to myself today while I was working. Yes they kept me active, they thrilled me and involved me and made me feel productive and useful. However, they also gave me a reason to reflect on how much I value the contact that I have with people. People like you reading. Many of you will interact with me in some way, simple and brief as it is, it is appreciated You may be reading and have never spoken with me before, yet what I say rings true in your own mind, and mirrors itself on your own experiences. Who knows, maybe in reading this blog you will for the first time reach out and say hello, to me or someone else important.
     
    Whatever it is that prompts us to take an action, make an effort, touch a life, it is our humanity and our need to be seen and to feel needed and wanted and accepted that allows each and every one of us to add value to each others lives. I am much like you, much like the person next to you, much others dotted in over 7 billion places across this globe of ours. We are all essentially the same, thoughtful, vulnerable, curious, mysterious, unique, interesting, judgemental....
     
    I could carry on using words into eternity but at the bottom line of things, we all have to accept that we are no better than the richest or the poorest, the most arrogant or most humble, most knowledgeable or most severely disabled among us. I am NO better than you because of what I do or who I am, and the same goes for you. When we overcome this perception of ourselves and our fellow man, maybe we can begin to understand how special we are, and what level of potential each of us holds. We can change the world by touching people, we can reach out and fill that void of loneliness, fear and pending hurt. We can all make a difference to someone's life, circumstances and sense of self worth, and is that not something worth trying to do?
     
    For today, I am grateful that I have reached out here, and made friends. Friendships that I treasure, relationships that grow with every day. I say this kind of thing often, and will continue to do so, as I really do believe the things I have said before, right now, and will say in my future are true, important and real. You are Special, today, tomorrow, forever.
     
    Thought for today - "Butterflies do not know the colour of their wings, but human eyes marvel at their beauty. Likewise you cannot see how good you are, but others see and know that you are special." Author Unknown
     
    Song for today - Feeling the Moment by Feeder
  7. Yettie One
    This is a funny old world in terms of friendships, relationships and how we interact with people. I have found over time that my outlook on life, and how I value my friendships has changed so remarkably in the last few years, maybe as a result of doing a bit of growing up myself.
     
    Traditionally I have always been terrified that allowing myself to 'grow up' or become more mature would make me boring. I guess in my limited view on the world, once you got to thirty or something, you automatically became old fashioned, boring or too sophisticated to have fun.
     
    Well I'm thirty nine now, so been in my thirties for quite a while, and I've come to realise that being thirty does not make me any less weird or crazy than I really ever was. The biggest change is that my body can't keep up with what my mind wants to do, and as a result I am frequently at an internal battle to get more out of myself.
     
    Another thing that I have come to realise is that once you get over that hurdle of accepting that age is not the be all and end all of life, you actually begin to realise that older people are indeed a lot more fun than I'd ever given them credit for. Yes they have so much more life experience and are more willing to er on the side of caution, but this is not because of boredom it is more to do with them wanting to help us avoid pain or hurt in the long run, or simply avoid it for themselves.
     
    We don't give the older generation the consideration or credit they deserve sometimes, and I have been massively guilty of this in my time. It is sad to think that it has taken all this time for me to realise this. I have written a couple of times on my blog about age and how the golden glow of youth is so treasured and sort after, and I think that much of the world chases after that image of perfection and eternal youth. I know that personally I never really wanted to grow up. Foolishly, I always wanted to consider myself young at heart, and I figured that this meant being young in life, but sadly I have grown up, and aged and gotten older and wiser. I now realise that I can remain young at heart without having to associate with the young, and still be able to enjoy myself without the fixation on youth.
     
    As a matter of fact, I am beginning to learn that without the fickleness of the young, relationships, friendships and communication is a whole lot simpler, more sustainable, and has a loyalty and stability that I am wholly unaccustomed too. Friendships up to date have existed around a bristle of selfishness, uncertainty and an egotistical climb to the top of the ladder. Don't get me wrong, friendship is friendship, and I have wonderful memories, and some amazing mates, but I do believe that while most friendships have a certain degree of selflessness, and an awful lot of selfishness, there comes a time in your life when this balance swings in the opposite direction, and you begin to realise just how important and precious friendship really is.
     
    We all use these words; "I love my friends, I couldn't live without them!" Yup, even I have been one to say something similar. "You can never have enough friends!" The cliché statements about friendship are endless, and while there is some truth in the words, the majority of it is a hollow expression of what we want the world to believe we mean, but fail to act out. As I reflect on friendships I've had in the past, I can't help but face the fact that I've been guilty of failing to be a true friend. I've always had a selfish streak, expecting people to stay in touch with me, always chasing the next big fix, forgetting about the people that maybe need a quiet word, or a simple hello. The worst thing is realising that there were people who were that kind of friend to me, and have fallen by the wayside as I surged onwards on my selfish quest for self fulfilment or something I never really found.
     
    Oh how the benefit of hindsight is a curse. Hindsight is a wonderful teacher, and if we heed the lesson, and we can change. Yes I have waisted some cherished friendships. People who have moved on, yet at one time or another were right there at my side, and while I may never get that back again, I can learn to shift the balance towards being a true friend myself. As you grow up in life, you begin to understand that the world does not revolve around you. There are those that are delusional enough to believe this still, and for them I feel sorry, but for the vast majority of us, at some stage in our lives, we wake up to the fact that we need to give more than we receive to survive. This is the balance of true friendship.
     
    For some, they will learn this lesson very quickly. Others, like myself, will take a while to get it. Whatever the time line, we all come to the realisation one day that we are not islands in the world. I see those that think they can survive on their own terms, and revel in their selfishness, and while I do not despise them, I only see myself in them, and realise that at some stage in the future, they will come to the hard realisation that their point of view, selfishness, and deluded understanding of true friendship is skewed.
     
    So while in my past I have been foolish, I have come to learn that friendship can be very satisfying with people from every walk in life. I have met and continue to meet amazing people on GA. This place has been a real special place to me in so many ways. Not only does it mean I get to test my ability as a writer, but through friendships and associations here on GA, I am learning so much about life, myself, and the world around me. The people I am lucky enough to consider my friends here are teaching me that sharing is a wonderful thing, that life has many facets, and that learning to accept who I am and what I am to the people that see me, is all part of being alive. There is true value in a strong relationship, and not every friendship is based on some form of attraction. There are many assets in the people around us, and each has their own special gem, a quality that makes them stand out from the crowd. It is taking time to see beyond what I need from a relationship that has allowed me to realise that I have so much to give. I can be a good friend, I can share, I can make a difference with a simple hello, or a kind word spoken on a bad day. To those that have taken the time to befriend me and show, teach and encourage me, thank you. You will never truly know the full impact you have had on my life, and continue to have every day. GA for me, as for so many others is so much more than just a place to read stories.
     
    Thought for today - "Trust is like a mirror. You can fix it if it is broken, but you will always see the crack in its reflection." - Lady Gaga
     
    Song for today - Here In Your Arms by Hellogoodbye

  8. Yettie One
    I love to keep busy. It makes the days race by, and all of a sudden, look, it is Saturday, and I am left wondering to myself where the hell did the last week go?
     
    The plus side of being a busy bee is that your mind is occupied and you get to spend lots of time doing fun things that recently you have not really been given the opportunity to enjoy. But then with every up side, there is a down side too, and while I have really enjoyed being as busy as I have this week, I have also missed kind of having my finger on the button so to speak.
     
    Does anyone else suffer GA withdrawl symptoms? No? Ok, I'll shut up now!
     
    lol. So you are all reading this thinking 'God Rob's gone mad!' and to be honest you wouldn't be far wrong. Life recently has been such a wild roller coaster of up hill and down hill, bored to distraction one moment and rushed into a manic frenzy the next. I do kind of feel like a tornado has swept through my life and left me very uncertain of where the heck I landed.
     
    Learning that life has moments of chaos and that we are actually quite adept at sorting it out, adapting and getting on with it is often an amazing feat that i pause to marvel at. Humankind has got to be the most adaptable creature on the planet, and the age old saying of "We'll make a plan" rings as true today as it ever has. Sometimes they are botch plans, temporary fixes, a patchwork to get us through the moment. Other times they are organisational wonders, detailed plans that involve hours of preparation loads of operational skill, and produce amazing results.
     
    Thing thing that I always find amusing about this random approach to our circumstances, is how often we are as unsuccessful as we are in getting the results we wanted in the first place. Failure is an ever present part of the plot, the uncertain and unpredictable result, much the same as a roll of the dice. Yet this doesn't seem to phase us as people. We just plough on, pick up the pieces of our failure and find another way. I love that about the human endeavour.
     
    Watch a small child. They set their mind on an eventual goal, and learn through experience how to go from where they stand, to the mind blowing feeling of achievement that success brings to us. It is this desire to win, this overwhelming burden to get it right, be the best, find a way, that makes us special people. So even in the chaos of random activity, the pressures of our daily lives, we still manage to find a way.
     
    Ways to stay in touch. Ways to let those who matter, know that they are important. Ways to stay healthy, and fed and watered. Ways to keep our finger on the pulse. So yeah, I guess I am just saying that despite the fact that we dip in and out of the focus of our friends and acquaintances it does not make us any less special, needed or important. We may from time to time feel a little isolated, lonely or forgotten, but reading between the lines, we realise that there are times we all just don't have the time we wish we had. It is probably just at that moment that the people you miss need to hear that you are there, alive, well and thinking of them. A simple message, a word of encouragement, a smile on a highly pressured day. These are all things we need, cherish and desire, so make a little effort and remember that those around us have just as much on their plate as we do on our own. Together we are the ones that make the difference in our world.
     
    Thought for today - "How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in our weary world." - William Shakespeare
     
    Song for today - Girls and Boys by Blur

  9. Yettie One

    LOL or ROFL?

    By Yettie One,

    We have always been rather blessed as a family, as comedy for our entertainment through the years has kind of always been provided by my mother. Mom is a wonderful woman, but takes fright really easily and is so gullible bless her. I have some pure classic memories through the years of funny instances and events that provided much mirth for me as a kid and us as a family.
     
    It is always good to get around the table and recount these memories or tease mom over the various mishaps through the years. From bringing a rather posh restaurant to a standstill on Christmas day, to having a coffee shop evacuated in error, or learning to skateboard on a parcel trolley, unintentionally I might add, mom has always managed to make me crack up.
     
    This week was a perfect example. To give everyone some background, my mom has Alzheimers, and I am a full time carer now for her, luckily having been given permission to work from home. Now while this is over all a hugely difficult thing to face, it does produce some moments that can only be describes as hilarious.
     
    On Monday afternoon, while I was busy working in my room, mom occupied herself in her room with some chore or other, and everything seemed fine. At some stage I became aware that mom had been in the bathroom for a fair amount of time. It is like a sub concious thing I have kind of developed to listen for tell tail signs of distress or emergency, even when I am busy.
     
    So, I noticed that she'd been in the bathroom a fair while, and so decided to just give a close listen and make sure she was ok. I could smell her shampoo (it has a really strong scent) and realised she was washing her hair, so panic over. However, a half hour later, she was still washing her hair. I wondered what was up, but again, I have learnt to be patient and allow her to do what she needs to do as long as she is in no danger.
     
    When I eventually heard the door open, I called out to check she was ok, and heard her gawf as she wondered through to her bedroom. I waited for her to change, and could hear her giggling in her room, and by now my curiosity was raised to high levels.
     
    Eventually she came through to my office, and while still drying her hair, informed me she'd had a disaster. I turned to look at her, and asked what had happened. She explained that she'd found some stuff in her cupboard for her hair, and had decided to try it out on a little bit of her hair to see if it still suited her. Well, apparently she'd got more than she anticipated on the one side of her hair, and it was a disastrous colour, (I assume from its age or something). Too shy to tell me, she'd rushed to wash it out, but it took 16 washes to get the stuff out.
     
    Well by now I was giggling myself, just from the state my mother was in while trying to explain this all too me. I got up and followed her through to her room to dry her hair for her, and as we got there I asked what she had done with the 'stuff' she'd put in her hair.
     
    "Oh I threw the bloody stuff out," she told me. "I don't want to be doing that again." (please bear in mind my mom's memory, she'd probably forget she'd tried this in a few weeks, and if it was still lying around might try it again. I am blessed in that my mom is still aware of her mental problems and manages them quite well when she can).
     
    "Oh", I said. "What was it doing still lying around?" My mom stopped dying her hair a number of years ago now.
     
    "I don't know, I just wondered what it would look like, so wanted to try a little, but that didn't work," she giggled.
     
    "What colour was it?" I enquired.
     
    "Hang on, I'll go get it," she replied wondering off as I readied the hair dryer.
     
    When she returned, the fun started.....
     
    What she handed to me was a small bottle of Revlon Facial Foundation in a light sandy colour. Well, I was rolling on the floor. I couldn't talk, tears were streaming down my face and my sides hurt like hell.
     
    When I could eventually talk, I explained the reason for my hysteria to my mom. "This is facial make up," I explained.
     
    My mom's eyes became the size of saucers, and she proclaimed, "Oh good God, what would I want to put that s**t on my face for?"
     
    Well, this moment will live long in my memory. My mom is a fine old lady that has done so much for me in my life, and while it is hard to deal with what is going on around me, it is our ability to laugh that makes it bearable some days. I hate to think about the reality of it all, but they say it is the good things in life you remember the longest. In this instance I know that this is true.
     
    We will all face hardship and difficult times at some point in our lives, but even in the darkness, there are days that are good days.
     
    Thought for today - "While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about." - Angela Schwindt
     
    Song for today - Mama I Love You by the Spice Girls
  10. Yettie One

    Climb Every Mountain

    By Yettie One,

    So the London 2012 great Summer of Sport came to a close this evening as the Paralympics came to an end at the Olympic Village.
     
    It has been a fantastic display of achievement on many fronts. Not only did we witness man going faster, further, higher, we learnt that the British are not as bad as we imagined, that a warm, friendly environment is as much a part of London as it is in Sydney, Beijing or Athens.
     
    We saw 70,000 people emerge from the shadows and step up to the mark to become Games Makers, a fitting tribute in name to a voluntary army of individuals who made the face of the London Games. Some of us were blessed with continuous coverage of every sport on individual channels. We got interviews, felt inspired and challenged and impressed by the talent, determination and ability of men and women, young and old, of every colour, creed and walk of life.
     
    We celebrated Iranian success in London, we rejoiced at Libyan sporting representatives. There were smiles and tears, pride and heartache and all the finest things attributed with the human endeavour of sporting achievement.
     
    So, what did it all mean for me? What did I get out of the amazing display of talent and British pride.
     
    To be honest, I was lucky enough to be caught up in a world of excitement and intrigue first hand, and was thrilled by the opportunity, and have memories that will last me a life time. Did that move me, or have a lasting impact on my perception of the world? Sadly I can only say that as a person that loves sporting endeavour, and as an avid sports watching fan, it was to me just another Olympic games. Yes admittedly, it was in my back garden, I got to participate in the event, and greatly enjoyed that. However there was nothing fundamentally outstanding about it for me.
     
    That was until three weeks later, when for the first time ever, I was almost forced to become wrapped up in the Paralympic games. For anyone living in the UK, they will know that it was almost impossible not to get caught up in the fever of it all, as British Channel 4 television mounted a relentless coverage of 11 days of ferocious sport.
     
    One of the first things I noticed that gave me pause for thought was the song choice that Channel 4 used for its theme tune to its coverage. I was somewhat mystified as to its choice, as the full song is nothing about sporting endeavour, or celebrating the good of mankind. The track, Harder Than You Think by Public Enemy is a rap tune that talks about the hardships of Afro American people and I suppose that it was drawing parallels with the prejudices that disabled people experience that prompted Channel 4 to choose the track. However, after hearing the tune several hundred times during the many advertising breaks that peppered the coverage of the sport, I began to hone in on the opening line that the edited version of the song used on the tele.
     
    "Thank you for letting us be ourself."
     
    It was this that really pricked my consciousness and in some ways, actually got me a little wound up. I mean, for starters, people with disabilities are not second class citizens. They are not a special breed to be allowed to be themselves once in a while, for which they can celebrate being allowed to be "out" and free. Why on earth should they have thank us for allowing them to be themselves. I mean they are who they are, people with soul, spirits, passions, desires. They bleed red, and cry tears just like you or me. Maybe that was me being over sensitive, but after hearing the line over and over again, I did begin to wonder if anyone else had noticed it. Maybe the Paralympians do feel a need to thank the world for recognising them on the same platform that we do able bodied Olympians, but we don't expect Olympic competitors to thank us for being allowed to be Olympians. Where is the equality in that?
     
    I was fortunate at a young age to be confronted by disability first hand, by having a friend who was an amputee, and maybe that has given me a more open out look on disability. I learnt not to be shy to look at a disabled person, or speak to them as an equal, without the feeling of curiosity, or the guilt of that same curiosity. I learnt to deal with the awkward stares and the lack of words. I got over the feeling of pity and the feeling of wanting to protect or prevent further hurt from coming to my friend.
     
    In reality I discovered that Ian was just like me. Yeah he only had one leg, but in every other way he was a horny teenage boy with dreams, insecurities, determinations and abilities. He was resourceful and boy could be accomplish something once he'd set his mind to it. While in our later years, we have lost touch, he is just as successful today, in fact being the proud owner of a restaurant and a fully trained master chef somewhere in Austria last I heard. I take my hat off to him, and knew from way back then that he'd be a successful man one day.
     
    But this is the thing. He didn't want pity or special treatment. He never had to thank me for treating him as someone different, or being allowed to be himself. Now looking back, and thinking about things a little more, I realise that as children we don't have prejudices. We are less inclined to make judgements or draw conclusions based on our own shortcomings and inability to deal with disability or disfigurement. I have seen people unable to look at a disabled person while talking to them. I've heard people say less than pleasant things about them. I've even been guilty of being patronising towards a disabled person myself. Maybe in as much as our kids are able to look beyond the limitations and be accepting and open and friendly, we can become, or more importantly I can become more understanding of a disabled person to be seen first as a human being, and second as a person with a disability.
     
    While I like to think I am not too bad, I found myself thinking "shame" as I looked on at some of the participants on track, and I woke up to a realisation that even though I may think I am not that bad, there is so much more that I could do to be more aware of disability and learn to consider them as equal. Seeing beyond the disability to the true person inside, and give everyone the same chance I would give an able bodied person, or desire to be given myself.
     
    The UK are pretty damn good at looking out for the interests of disabled people. I have seen more provision for people with all manner of challenging conditions in this country than anywhere else I have visited, and that is something to be proud of. But while our institutions and government maybe get it a little more than the average Joe Bloggs on the street, I honestly do think that this time around, the Paralympic Games in London have challenged a nations perception of disability and disabled people. I know it challenged me.
     
    One of the commentators said of the games that, "back in Sydney the Paralympic Games gave disabled people a platform to become equal with their able bodied brothers and sisters in sport. The London 2012 Games gave them a platform to become heroes", and it was this statement that made me realise that disability in my mind has come of age. It is not something to fear or pity or look down on. Disability is a challenge in life, just as much as able bodied living is a challenge. Yes they are on different scales and make life difficult in a variety of ways, but give a man an opportunity and watch in amazement as he learns to perfect, excel and master his art. London 2012 showed me and the world that regardless of adversity, application and dedication to the task at hand, hard work, guts and a desire to win is a part of every walk of life, able bodied or otherwise.
     
    Thought for today - "Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit." - Napoleon Hill
     
    Song for today - Every Tear is a Waterfall by Coldplay
  11. Yettie One

    Lessons in Love

    By Yettie One,

    They say that nature has much to teach us, and that the simplicity of the laws of nature give the complexities of life some kind of roadmap for understanding how things work. But then people say a lot of things, and not all of them make sense, or are not as easy to understand or work out as it would seem. I mean lets be honest there are some pretty complicated emotions and feelings associated with something like a relationship that nature hasn't got a clue about right?
     
    Hmmmmm, lets consider one of the most fundamental relationships that exist between mankind and nature.
     
    Man's best friend. The simplicity of the relationship between a person and their dog could in someways be used to give us some useful lessons about the dynamic of a successful relationship. Madness you think? Well allow me to get you to think a little...
     
    Think not about the dynamic from a human perspective. Try if you can for a moment to put yourself in the dog's shoes/paws.
     
    Love given unconditionally. Loyalty. Care and compassion. Forgiveness. Joy. Peacefulness. Dedication.
     
    Just a few words that you would have to consider in life as a dog. Yeah, if you think about it, as long as a dog gets a little attention, fed on a regular basis, loved and walked, it matters not what kind of life they lead, they are always faithful and diligent to their master, right to the end.
     
    They never hold a grudge. Never worry about anniversaries, birthdays, being early or late. They forgive endless mistakes. They can be forgotten outside in the cold, left to wait in a boiling hot car, be scared witless by our fascination with fireworks, yet will always jump and and give endless love unconditionally when we pay them the attention they crave.
     
    They are fiercely protective of our safety, jealous guards of our time and space, love to be near us, wait patiently for our return, and celebrate our return passionately. They love to see us smile, listen to our woes without judging or making comment. They give comfort and kisses, even when we don't really want them.
     
    They make us laugh, and make us frown. Even when we get mad at them, they never hold it against us, and when we may be harsh, or lash out unexpectedly, they are quick to put it behind them and move on. They are cautious of strangers and welcome friends.
     
    Now for heavens sakes I am not suggesting we all go out and start dating our canine pets. That would be just a little outrageous!
     
    However, I am suggesting that there are a few things that dogs do that we could learn from in our quest to build strong and long lasting relationships.
     
    Right, so give consideration for a moment to what makes a good relationship. A good friendship. Loyalty, dedication, compassion, trust, diligence, patience, forgiveness....
    See a pattern beginning to form?
     
    Maybe the reality is that much as the fantastic ability of a dog to love its owner unconditionally regardless of its circumstances is the starting blocks of what true love really is. That magical word unconditional is something we talk about a lot in life. It is something that is elusive and difficult to achieve as we are by nature selfish beings. We are out to get as much as we can for ourselves as fast as we can for as long as we can. So this unconditional malarky is a complete reverse of our predominant characteristic as a person.
     
    If we aspire to be a little less caught up in our selfish worlds of me me me, maybe we could learn to be better people. Better partners, better friends, better lovers. Take the time to try understand, be more compassionate, more forgiving, a little more willing to listen and not judge, more willing to stand at the shoulder of our loved ones, even if we may not agree with their decisions or choices.
     
    If we could just learn to be more attentive, more patient, more willing to have fun, be excited about the simplest things like spending time in one another's company, regardless of where, when or why, maybe if we could just take time to appreciate that we are not alone, not forgotten, not ignored, we could feel more appreciative of all we have.
     
    I mean how hard can it be? Well take it from me, not easy. Heck to get it right is bloody tough, and while nature may show a lot of simplicity in its lessons, this is not a simple life, and it is never easy to change our ways or alter our characteristics to being less human in a way. But in the long run it can almost make life worth living. It could bring an extra level of something special to our relationships and emotional well being. Isn't that something worth trying?
     
    I don't know, but I do know this...
     
    We are not perfect, I have said it so many times before, and as I look around me in my daily life, there is so much to learn, so many places to draw ideas, lessons and new insight from, that maybe this is how we learn to become better people. Maybe this is how we are meant to learn... What do you think?
     
    Thought for today - "Try not to become a man of success but a man of value" - Albert Einstein
     
    Song for today - Some Nights by Fun.
  12. Yettie One
    So it has been a tough couple of weeks for me which culminated in a bit of a disaster yesterday. Here is how it unfolds...
     
    As a person I tend to be a pretty private person, but when I find I like someone I will open up pretty quickly, and hey I think we are all like that to a degree. You have to let the people you want to become close too, to see the real you. Sometimes slowly, but once in a while you do it a little faster than at other times.
     
    Well, time and life has taught me that this is not always the best thing to do, coz once you start to let those walls down, you expose yourself to hurt, and people are fickle. They build impressions, make assumptions and guess an awful lot, and when things don't pan out quite to what their expectations were, you find yourself carrying the can. Yep, you may assume from this that I've been disappointed, and the answer to that would be yes, but then haven't we all at some point in our lives? So pick myself up, quit moaning and move on. Fair enough.
     
    Now this is where I open myself up to share a little piece of me with those of you that bother to read. I could easily allow such an experience to sour my perception of the world. In 38 years of living it has happened enough times to make me fed up of having my feelings trashed at the feet of people that couldn't care less, and yeah at times I just wanna scream. I wanna smash something, lash out and be nasty. What would I gain though?
     
    We cannot change who we are! This is a fundamental fact of life. You may be able to alter little things, you might be able to harden your heart, but you are who you are, and you have to find a way to be happy living in your own skin. I can honestly say that this is not as easy as it may seem. Some people have a marvellous ability to appear happy all the time. Some of them really are happy, but for the vast majority of us we are smiling to the world to hide our scars, laughing with friends to fit in, and giving the impression of happiness to fool ourselves into believing that life isn't so hard.
     
    This is the thing. Life is tough, for me, for you, for any one of us. We look at the rich and famous and think they have it all, but reality knocks and truth is happiness isn't found in wealth and fast cars, trendy clothes and expensive gifts. Sure money might make things a little more fun, but money can't buy you the one thing that you really need to be happy.
     
    Wanna know what I honestly believe that is?
     
    Simple. People around you that honestly, truly, and without compromise love you. Happiness lies in the people that are there to pick you up when the chips are down. Happiness is being able to share with someone that listens as much as they speak. Happiness is knowing that you have someone that you can call any time you need them, be it 4am in the morning or 8pm at night.
     
    They will cry with you, laugh with you, go shopping with you. They have the courage to tell you when you are being an idiot, they will tell you when you are heading for disaster and they will always be there to help you pick up the pieces. These are the things, no, hell no, these are the PEOPLE that you must learn to treasure, and if there is one thing that you have to do in life.... Tell them you love them. Tell it to them each and every day if you feel you must. Tell them how important they are, how special and unique they are, and how much they make your life worth living. Don't assume these things are known! Tomorrow will come and it is always too late when the chance is stolen.
     
    See this is the stark realisation that I came to this week. You may or may not know that I care full time for my mom who as an elderly woman has a fair few things wrong with her, so it is little wonder that at some time in the near future she will pass on to that special place where she will be happy and free from our worldly woes. But I shudder to think how I will deal with that day when it comes, and on Friday afternoon, I almost thought the day had come. My mom collapsed in my arms and lost consciousness for a period of time. My initial thoughts when she went down was that she had died in my arms, and while that may sound awfully dramatic and maybe a little over the top, when it happens to you one day, you will appreciate the fear, horror and alarm that suddenly courses through your veins and races through your mind.
     
    I was sitting there on the floor, with her head on my lap on the phone to the ambulance people begging her not to die because I hadn't told her how much I love her. Now in my case, I am a mummies boy. Probably why looking after my mom is actually quite a pleasure for me, and while it depresses the hell out of me to watch her slowly deteriorate, and I feel so useless sometimes to stop it, I do get an element of satisfaction out of being there for her just as she was for me once.
     
    Now please, I know that every one of us has different circumstances, and some of us have had wonderful home lives and others have not. Some of us are close as families and others not, so please don't feel that this post is trying to tell you to bridge gaps with your family or something. Your circumstances are your own, and you know them better than anyone, so will know what is right and what is wrong for you. But..... we all have someone special to us. A friend, a relative, a pastor, a partner. Who ever it is, don't be stupid like me. Don't just assume that they will know.
     
    Heck obviously my mom knows that I love her right? She is my mom for crying out loud, it is fairly natural to expect that despite our differences and arguments and fall outs over the years, to expect that she knows I love her, but the truth is, when I was sat there with tears running down my cheeks looking at her pale body on the ground, all I wanted to do was tell her how much I loved her.
     
    And this is the point I try to make today. People in life will let you down. People will hurt you, abuse you, tear you apart emotionally, but a small handful of very special people will be there for you every step of the way, and it is only right to let them know how much they really mean to you. It doesn't have to be some big display of affection or a statement of intent. Simple words like, 'Hey you are a really special person to me, and I love you.' This is only my own humble opinion, but we need to let those special people know how important and loved they really are. It is for your own good as much as theirs, and heck it really ain't that hard.
     
    Hope that these words will encourage you to go away from here today and tell someone close that you care enough to tell them they are loved.
     
    Thought for today "When you are up, your friends know who you are. When you are down, you know who your friends are!" - Brian Marijeni
     
    Song for today - From a Distance by Bette Midler

  13. Yettie One

    Adjustments

    By Yettie One,

    Coming down off Cloud 99 is a somewhat bitter sweet experience. I think everyone has experienced the short, sharp slap of reality as you loose the sense of euphoria that you have enjoyed being caught up in the whirlwind of being in a new place, meeting new people, thriving on new experiences. The acute sense of normalcy is kind of difficult to take, the monotony of boredom is suddenly very real once more and you cannot help but reflect back on how while you were away every nano second seemed to be filled with some kind of hyperactivity.
     
    It is the same for any one of us when you return home from a period in your life that prior to its existence you have enthused about, prepared for, allowed the sense of excitement quietly build as your taste buds salivate at the possibilities that lie before you. Yes then it is on you, that moment in your life when you are living the dream, you've escaped the pressures of regular daily life, and can for a fleeting moment leave behind the things that worry your mind and stress your life.
     
    So you are way from it all in this brief period of anonymity, and I think that is an important part of the freedom that we feel when we are away from home. No one know's us, we are away from the expectations of life at home, we can momentarily put the worries and concerns of our lives away and enjoy being free to enjoy these experiences and feelings as we partake in this exciting new adventure.
     
    But the reality is that the adventure never lasts, and the blues will follow the natural high that you have coasted on while enjoying this significantly small period of your life, yet just as significantly special time in your life.
     
    That for me is the feeling that I focus on right now. Yeah it is rather sobering to come back down to normal, of course it is hard not to feel blue, but for a brief moment I made memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life, and met friends that I know will be people I respect and admire for years to come. Plus I have some pretty great people around me to come home to, so while it is easy to feel blue that I am no longer away from home, I am grateful to be back with people I love and who I know love me.
     
    So yeah, it is ok to feel a little forlorn on a return to normalcy after a period of high excitement, infact if I didn't feel a little weird I would worry I was not normal. These are the adjustments that we make every single day in life. Learning to cope with the wild roller coaster of ups and downs that life throws in our direction. I have a theory, if you can't experience the pain of disappointment then you can never enjoy the thrill of fulfilment. Every day I wake, I have to learn something new about being human, and every night when I lay my head on the pillow to sleep and am grateful for the people I love and the friends who carry me on. There really isn't very much more I need in life to be happy, and this is the conclusion I draw from taking time out to think about the things I've been through in the last two weeks of living.
     
    Thought for today - "Whether we are prepared or not, life has a habit of thrusting situations upon us." - Lucille Ball
     
    Song for today - Winner by Pet Shop Boys
  14. Yettie One
    Our very cosmopolitan world is so driven by consumer focus and the image of perfection, that in many ways it is almost as if we have lost sight of our humanity. We want to be seen in the best, by the best, with the best. It is all about perception and what we can or can't portray of ourselves to the world we live in.
     
    Be it trends on the catwalk, labels in the stores, the very latest tech gadgets, the most bling, the best car....
    From our homes to the nails we have glued to our hands, it is all done in a quest to beautify ourselves, better our persona and come off as something more than what we really are? I can't help but wonder a little how our value system has skewed so much.
     
    Take any individual person and give him or her the time to show themselves for who they really are. I am sure that in the majority of the instances you'll find that the person is a decent guy or girl. We all are made up of the same stuff. Emotions, insecurities, values, desires, passions, weaknesses, vulnerabilities. Hell the list is endless really. Every single one of us have these. We all fear rejection, whether you want to admit it or not. We all hate disappointment. Heck if we really want to be completely honest we are all horny buggers out to get as much out of life as we can, and truth be told more often than not we are pretty damn selfish about it too.
     
    Yeah we fall in love, and share and reach out and touch others. Yes there are people that are better at it than others, but it is pretty simple when you consider the basics. We all want to be happy, accepted and cherished at some level in our lives.
     
    So if it boils down to these simple truths then why the hell do we go and complicate it with all the extra baggage we add to our lives?
     
    I mean I sat a couple of days ago and looked at over 5000 people wonder past me as I relaxed on the grass verge. I was struck by the efforts we make as humans to wear the best clothes, have the best gadgets, be seen in the best seats in the house or hanging with the right people, and I was struck by the lengths that we go to, to be a part of this wave of trendiness.
     
    Does any of it make us a better person? Is the London Docklands worker in his smart suit and latest iPod any better than the Port Talbot Steel worker, or the Yorkshire Coal Miner or the Liverpool ship builder who is in a T shirt and Jeans with a cheap MP3 player if anything at all?
     
    The reality.... take the time to get to know each one of them, not just the image they want the world to see, but the real person within, and they will all be the same. Good, genuine, decent people with huge things that they are covering up with this plastic screen of perfection that we hide behind.
     
    I guess what I am learning at this point in my life is those Gucci designer glass you wear really aren't all that important. That fab hair cut you needed a small mortgage to get, really wasn't critical. The swanky car you drive or the million dollar home you live in, really doesn't set you aside from the guy living on the street or the poor lady who walks ten miles to work because she can't afford a bus ticket.
     
    Looking like the best thing in the world does not make you the best thing in the world. It is who you are, your character, your compassion, your humanity that make you important. It is the small things that you can do to bring a smile to the face of a friend, or the words you can share with someone close when they need an ear to hear. It is the hugs you can give when the world needs a pick me up, or the smile you share that lets them know you are proud of them.
     
    A parent understands this a little more than most. In most instances they have first hand experience of wanting more for someone else than themselves. They learn to be sensitive towards a child's feelings, think first for their safety, plan for their success, take joy in their happiness and are the first to step up to comfort when the chips are down.
     
    Is there not a lesson that we as a wider society can learn from this example? We see it going on around us all day every day. Love, unconditional, unselfish and genuine. It is a fine standard to cherish and to seek. It is an example we would to well to heed, and learn much from if we followed it more in our every day lives.
     
    I owned a Jaguar once. Now I drive a little VW Golf. I prefer the golf, at least the top goes down. I guess what I am saying is that in life I am learning that having everything does not bring joy. Being in with the "in crowd" does not make you better. Being popular, recognised or special is not a sure route to happiness. You don't have to be perfect to be great, you just have to be genuine.
     
    Thought for today - "When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it." - Edgar Watson Howe
     
    Song for today - Wings of a Butterfly by H.I.M.
  15. Yettie One

    Brief Hello

    By Yettie One,

    An early start is never a good thing after a long night of partying. My hearing is still recovering, my head is still fuzzy and my tummy has been cursing me most of the day. But it was all as a result of my own self indulgence, so while I do feel rough, I am so glad I do.
     
    Does that make any sense at all?
     
    Heck, I don't know who managed to see what, last night was just amazingly chaotic, but in a hugely good way. From 4pm when I got there, the Olympic Park was buzzing. The London Olympic Committee have all along said that they want these games to be remembered as the friendly games, and if yesterday was anything to go by, the people of the UK should be proud to welcome the world to London.
     
    From the second you entered the stadium, there was a buzz. An energy. A sense of humanity. Everyone was smiling. Everyone was happy. Everyone was excited. It was electrifying. I have been to a number of special gigs through my time here in the UK, some of them for great causes like the Tsunami Relief Cardiff in 2005, others world recognised events like Glastonbury, and while each of these were special, dynamic and left an indelible impression on my psyche nothing can compare with the atmosphere and excitement of the London 2012 Olympic Opening Ceremony.
     
    Is this my endorsement of the British welcome to the games. Heck yes. China stand aside. Did we compare. Of course we did. There was no military precision or impressive human formations, but we used technology and lighting to produce an extraordinary spectacular. Apparently up to 4 billion people watched a walk through British cultural history, as a blend of celebration, symbolism and respect gave the world a sense of life in the UK.
     
    The colours and variety of sensory images throughout the stadium could only lead to sensory overload last night. There was so much going on. That stadium is stunning, and when it is lit in blues and whites and reds, words fail to adequately express the experience. At times, the stands were just a blaze of camera flashes, at other times the strobe effect made everything appear to move in jerked slow motion.
     
    For me the biggest success of last night was the overwhelming sense of inclusion, especially of the next generation. From kids in pyjamas celebrating the NHS to giving the honour of lighting the Olympic flame to a group of young athletes, what games has ever presented its legacy to inspire a generation of new sports men and woman in a more fitting way? (and OMG what a stunning Olympic flame it was)
     
    I can only imagine what it would be like to view it from the point of view of the many camera's that captured the event. I've yet to see a repeat, but got to see some of it on the huge screens that grace the stadium roof. I don't profess to be any expert, but in terms of how it made me feel, yesterday was a stunning success for the British Olympic Organising Committee, and a fantastic celebration of everything British.
     
    My only disappointment? Paul McCartney's performance of Hey Jude. But I won't complain too much. For me, it is back to the pool later tonight to watch more of the swimming. It has been everything I expected and so much more. I could go on talking about it for ages, but I think I have enthused enough. The buildings have been dressed in fine fashion. The staff and volunteers are polite, knowledgeable and prompt. There is no ominous sense of a military presence, even though they are visible. Credit where credit is due, this is The Friendly Games.
     
    I'll write more as and when I can. Miss you all, hell I wish I could have celebrated last night with some of you rather than a few work colleagues, but this is life. Take care. Thank you so much for your messages both private and on my wall. Love you all lots.
     
    Song for today - We Can Be Heroes by the X Factor Finalists.
  16. Yettie One

    Home :]

    By Yettie One,

    Wow, I'm home, lying on my own bed, feeling very happy indeed.
     
    I didn't think that I'd miss this place as much as I did this last week. I was busy, doing exciting stuff, seeing and doing and being...
     
    Yet in as much as I love to travel, as much as I love my work, and as much as being away from home is a refreshing break, it is lovely to come home.
     
    It's the little things that make me smile right now.
     
    I forgot to take nail clippers away with me. I mean, come on, who thinks to pack nail clippers when your too busy checking you got your Dictaphone, or packed your mobile charger, or you've got your rain gear. I'm a little fussy about my nails, something that came about through forcing myself to stop biting my nails, so when they get a little too long, they drive me insane. I was going to go out and buy a pair of clippers, but decided I've done that about five times on other trips, and have a drawer full of clippers now, so i'd force myself to be patient and wait. OMG I nearly jumped out the car window on the drive home tonight. It feels so good to have nice clean trimmed nails tonight!
     
    I'm a pillow man, and have a thing about my pillows. Just the right number, just the right softness, just the right height. You can never get that in a hotel.
    So home now, snuggled into my pillows is such a comforting feeling. I do love my pillows. I even have a tendency to cuddle one while I fall asleep at night.
     
    I missed this place. I've kind of gotten used to GA, and am forging some great friendships with some amazing people. You get into a comfort zone when you can message and chat to people you like when you like. When that freedom is restricted it is kind of like being a little boy not quite tall enough to reach the cookie jar. Damn, it was not a good feeling. Grrrrrrrrrrrr!
    Despite the fact I was able to jump on now and again, I still had to be mindful that I was not at home, and on a private wifi connection that was not their to be abused. It's not easy suddenly feeling cut off. I missed my access any time I wanted, visiting where ever I wanted. Plus I got home to an email advising me that BT Infinity is now available in my area. BONUS.
     
    But aside from all of that, the best thing to come home to was a massive great big hug from my mom.
    Argh, I guess I'm still a mommies boy at heart.
    In these days of precious time we get to spend together, I treasure these moments, and to sit with her and listen to her excited babble, even though she had a lot of difficulty remembering things, made my heart feel warm. I missed her, and I'm glad to be here near her for a few days again.
     
    So yeah. Home it is, and James didn't spare the horses on the way home either.
    haha
    I'm off again later in the week, back down to London to be in place for everything to kick off on Friday next week. Olympics 2012, here I come.
     
    Hugs to all you wonderful people, you'll probs all get a hoard of messages from me now I'm back. Hope you don't mind me filling up your in boxes. xx
     
    Thought for today - "Love begins by taking care of the closest ones, the ones at home." Mother Teresa
     
    Song for today - Free the Flame by The Sound of Cathedral House

  17. Yettie One
    It is a basic principle of life really. Whatever effort you put into something is what you reap in reward. There are a million different sayings that reflect it, its something we are taught to understand from a young age, and it is a lesson in life that we put into practice every single day we wake up.
     
    Yet we never seem to do it quite well enough!
     
    How often do we put everything we have into everything that we do? If we did, we'd be physically exhausted by the end of the day, but then again I can't help but wonder if this lack of enthusiasm is part of our downfall as a race. See I reckon that man can evolve in reverse as well as evolve for the better. It would only stand to reason that we could devolve as a result of some of the advancements that mankind have made in our lives.
     
    I mean think about the car. It is a magnificent marvel of engineering yes, and god there are some amazingly beautiful models of car out there (personally I am rather fixated with the new, BMW 2012 Alpina B7. OMG sex on wheels!!!) but while it is a marvel of human ingenuity it stopped us from walking. When I moved to the UK I didn't have enough money to have a car for the first two years. I learnt to rely on public transport and my two pins. I don't think I'd ever walked so much in my life, but I was fit, healthy and loved it. Now I got a car, I've been able to travel to some amazing places, see some wonderful things, have the freedom to do what I want when I want, but I don't walk anymore.
     
    It's the same with food. KFC. Jeesh I got a massive soft spot of the Colonel's Chicken. But what with microwave meals, tinned food, pre cooked this, and ready made that, that fine tradition of growing what we eat, eating what we need, and enjoying all of it has kind of withered away. Fresh fruit salad! When was the last time I had a proper real fresh fruit salad. Yeah, I might have one now that has one or two fresh fruits in it, but so much of it is tinned. The last time I personally prepared a fully fresh fruit salad if I am totally honest was over 13 years ago in Africa, and that reality is pretty damn sad!
     
    Once upon a time we built pyramids to honour our royalty. Now we build fountains that don't work properly and are shrouded in controversy. The amazing thing was we built them without cranes and massive earth moving machinery. You gotta ask yourself, could we do the same thing today? Maybe if we had all those slaves and people to work on it ey! The sad reality lies I believe in that building a pyramid would be seen as far too much effort for securing the after life of some king or queen.
     
    From the top going down, society has changed. Of course there is nothing wrong with that, and it is only fair to expect people to change as things have gotten easier, as man kind have made discovery after discovery to improve our lives and our understanding of the world we live in, but I cannot help but ponder if all this development is in man's best interest.
     
    Our planet has just gone over the 7 billion people mark. Over 100 thousand people will die in the world today, but over 300 thousand will be born. This year already we've lost 2,7 million hectares of green forest world wide, and we have 15,122 days left until the world runs out of oil. (source Worldometers) Is all the knowledge we gain the knowledge we really need? Does the interest of our planet really lie at the heart of our hunger for knowledge?
     
    It is a humbling thought. When I look at the Worldometers page, it brings home in very real terms how little we have, and how foolishly we squander it. Maybe our greed or selfishness outstrips our design for life. We love our lives of luxury, don't get me wrong, I am just as guilty of this as anyone else. I love my computers, and my electric fan, the car in my drive, and a mircowave meal when I'm too lazy too cook. I read about a community over the weekend who have decided to forsake the comforts of the world, and live what they describe as an organic lifestyle, surviving off the land in every way possible. I was kind of jealous of them in a way, but I don't think i'd survive without my internet connection or laptop.
     
    There is a movie out at the moment called 7 Days in Havana. Josh Hutcherson (Lush ) stars in it. I was trying to find out a bit about the movie, and watched an interview he did about the movie. In the interview he says that while he was on location in Havana he met with people who had so little in life, were so poor compared with standards he was accustomed too, and yet were so alive, vibrant and happy. It kind of struck me. We have all these things in our lives, yet are not content. If I asked myself, "Are You Happy", I'd have to say no.
     
    Maybe we've lost touch with reality. No, maybe I've lost touch with reality. Which brings me back to my original thought. We get out of life what we put into it. Maybe I'm putting emphasis on things that are not important, giving attention to stuff that could be put on the back burner, and not really putting enough into the things that bring happiness, contentment and fulfilment.
     
    For the last few days I've struggled with paying attention to stuff. I've been mad at life and mad at the world. For various reasons, and stuff going on in my own mind, and its affected me, but I've come to the conclusion that you can either sit down and let life whip you, or you can get back up and give it everything and try make it. After all, like I said, you only get out of it what you put in.
     
    Thought for today - "A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master gardener of his soul, the director of his life." - James Allen
     
    Song for today - I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz
  18. Yettie One

    Cruel Summer

    By Yettie One,

    Although the weather is something we don't like to discuss, as its the only topic we can really turn to in an awkward silence, or when trying to be polite to a stranger, I can't help but spend a little time thinking about the glorious summer that's arrived this year!
     
    We are meant to look forward to summer. The sun's back! It's happy time. School's out. Fun, Fun, Fun. Down to the beach, everyone's off on holiday, the sun is shining, and its hot. We can get out of the house, the flowers are in bloom, the sun is shining, and everyone is smiling. The lads are walking around with their T's tucked into their long shorts (bonus) and the lasses are in skimpy little bikini's on the beach. Did I mention that the sun is shining?
     
    Ha!
     
    NOT!!!!
     
    We've had more rain in the last few months than we've recorded since records began. Well that is what they keep telling us on the news. It was the wettest May since records began, and its just been confirmed that it was the wettest June since records began! Have these people not heard of the Flood????
     
    No pun intended, I know that a lot of very unfortunate people have suffered flooding recently, but I get a bit miffed when they rate the miserable weather as being the worst since this or since that. Crumbs its bloody miserable without having a competition about how bad it really is!
     
    I really feel sorry for the American's at the moment. Hell they are having a heat wave like none other. I do not do well in the heat, so can only say I am sooooo grateful that I am not living there right now. I would literally melt!
     
    The US really does seem to have the worst of the worst when it comes to weather. If its not a hurricane hitting land, its tornadoes ripping through the mid west, or heat waves scorching the south, or snow storms grid locking the north, or earth quakes hitting the west. Erm..... Ok so earth quakes are not weather phenomenons Mr Clever Cloggs! But, you get the picture.
     
    I live in little old England, where the most we can complain about is silly rain! Oh hang on, we got ONE tornado in the storm the other day. I think it hit a field. Ha!
     
    When I stop to think about the wild fires that grip Australia and the US, Greece and parts of Africa I am grateful we don't have any tinder dry forests on this tiny island. When I pause to think of the effects of the droughts that strike Africa or the monsoon's that rip through Asia, I'm pretty glad we don't have any deserts or monsoon like rainfall on a persistent level here. You know really speaking, we have it pretty good. Yes we all moan, yes we miss the sun, and when it is hot, its too bloody hot, and the humidity makes us all cranky, and we moan a bit more. It is a British past time. Weather is a topic of national pride. It's something we are proud of. Our grey skies, and the misty mornings. You can read about them in almost any book ever written about the UK.
     
    So when I think to myself, argh its another crappy day here in the UK, I'm trying to teach myself to look on the brighter side. At least its summer. It might not be perfect, but I'm going to make the bloody most of it while I can.
     
    Thought for today - "Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." - Martin Luther King Jr.
     
    Song for today - Blame it on the Weatherman by B*witched

  19. Yettie One
    I got to thinking about sexuality again today, specifically about how trends seem to change with how we present our sexuality, even as fashion or social trends change. It got me really wondering, is the latest trend of seeing so many people describe themselves as BiSexual now a new reality or just a cop out that gives a new generation an ounce of credibility in the eyes of their peers.
     
    My pondering should not be taken as an attack on people that are truly BiSexual or anyone who identifies themselves as such for whatever reason, more just the musing of an enquiring mind.
     
    See, I can't help but wonder if this sudden increase in the number of people, especially the younger generation that identify themselves as BiSexual, is not more a matter of self preservation as society finds a loop hole in our perception of sexuality that lends to greater social acceptance among our peers.
     
    When you take the time to chat with a few of these people, I have found that a few are very clearly open to sexual partners of any kind, but the majority seem to be hiding behind a definition that is not seen as threatening by people who would be more inclined to pick on someone who identifies themselves openly as gay.
     
    We are a creature that are set to evolve and find ways to protect ourselves, and I can't help but wonder if sexuality is influenced by societies perception of what is right, what is wrong, and what is acceptable as a middle ground between the two. Does this grey area where we are kind of not so inclined to take exception, the place where those who are different from what our peers consider normal, become the place where we seek refuge? Is it the case that BiSexual, which could be taken to be less threatening than a fully gay person, is the new cool, a place that gay people can become lost in, in order to avoid conflict?
     
    I few years ago when I was working as a doorman in Swansea in South Wales, I first began to notice this trend as more and more of the gay 'scene' became less and less intimidated being seen out on the straight 'scene'. Those gay bars of yester year have become less of a trend now, as gay people have become more and more entrenched in our modern society here in the UK. But that is not to say that gay people have it all easy now. Yes generations have changed their perception here, even in the twelve years I've lived here I've noticed this, but it is still not easy to be a gay man or woman in the UK.
     
    Bullying is still common place, and if you speak to most gay people, they have all gone through a tough time either at school, work or even in the home. So it does make me wonder if this is a whole new trend of humanity finding a new way to mitigate that strife we experience as a homosexual, deflecting some of the hostility towards our sexuality by identifying with a grouping that is perceived by our society as a less intimidating and wholly more acceptable sexual difference.
     
    Thought for today - "The best way to find yourself is to loose yourself in service of others." - Mahatma Gandhi
     
    Song for today - Girls and Boys by Blur

  20. Yettie One
    There is one thing in each of our lives that affects us in some fashion regardless of how we might try to avoid it, fail to understand it, or seek to find it.
     
    It can be illusive, it can be mystifying, it can be frustrating, it can creep up on you unexpected. It amazes us, it brings us great happiness and unbearable heart ache. This wonderful, powerful, thing is not a person, it's not physical, it's certainly not something you'll see or meet, yet it lives in each of us, can be very physically expressed, and you see it on peoples faces every day and meet it every time you find two people in love.
     
    Love. Only four letters. Such a simple word, but one of the most complex emotions know to man. It is something we all crave, something we need, a feeling we require almost as much as we need food or water to live.
     
    Yet as much as we need it, it is not something common to find. It is something we mistake too easily, a feeling we share too freely, an emotion we abuse, take for granted and lose far too much. It's something that when we have it we are blissfully happily, and when we find ourselves without it experience feelings of loneliness that makes life quite unbearable.
     
    What is it about love that makes it such a domineering emotion for mankind? Why do we need it so?
     
    I think if we were all to list our personal reason for its importance in our lives, it would be interesting to see the different levels that love impacts our lives on every level. I also think that we'd do well to see the variety of reasons that we present for its importance as part of the reason for its complexity. You see, everyone views love through different eyes. We all have different expectations, our needs, insecurities, dependencies, curios traits, funny habits and a whole list of other factors of each persons personality that makes love one of the biggest things of our lives.
     
    Some would say that you only have one shot at true love. Others would argue that you can find love anywhere if you look hard enough. I believe that a lot of people hide behind the word for a variety of selfish reasons. Some will tell you that real love arrives when you find your soul mate, and yet more would try convince you that love is all about learning to love.
     
    But what is it about love? I mean come on.... What is all the fuss about?
     
    The truth? We are not designed to survive without it. A human man, a woman, a child.... We cannot survive without love.
     
    As a child we learn love through the expression of those around us. Mainly from our parents, but in some cases from others that show us time, care about us, and makes us feel warm, safe and special. We learn to feel comfortable in love. It brings us happiness, acceptance, safety, companionship and possibly most importantly gives us a sense of identity. Knowing someone cares that much for us kindles a fire within us. It's these feelings that drive us. We all want to feel them at every level of our lives, especially from our peers, from our friends, from the people we like, the people we choose to spend time with. Without these feelings where would we be?
     
    Love can be expressed in many ways, but which ever way we receive it, there is something about it that is special for each one of us, and these are the feelings we crave the most. So next time your thinking about love, just stop and ask yourself what it is that makes love special for you. I think you'll find it's not an easy question to answer, but taking a moment to try understand it gives us a completely new appreciation for it.
     
    Thought for today - "You can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel." - Johnny Depp
     
    Song for today - Caribbean Blue by Enya
  21. Yettie One

    First Times

    By Yettie One,

    That very first time you try something new is always a little bit daunting, a little bit exciting, a whole lot of nerves, a nice burst of adrenaline and the amazing feeling of achievement afterwards.
     
    It also makes for some wonderful memories, even if the very first time you tried something was not the best experience you ever had.
     
    Take for example the first time you ever rode on a roller coaster. Now see for me as a kid, I grew up in a part of the world that 'Big' rides were just unheard of, and so for me a roller coaster was a ride at the fair that came to town once a year.
    Move to the UK, and a little team of friends worked out that once a year we'd all get together once a year for a reunion of sorts, one year deciding to go to Thorpe Park. Well, bowl me over, I have never had such a blast in my life, and heck I tell you the experience of riding a 'Big' ride was everything I ever dreamed it would be!
     
    Then there was the first time I ever got drunk! LOL
    As a rather young, somewhat naive kid, my sister's boyfriends brother and I decided we'd act all mature at my brother's 21st birthday party. Now lets see, I'd have been twelve at the time, and Carlos would have been a year younger. The beers were chilling in a huge drum of water and ice, and you basically helped yourself.
    Well when it got dark and we couldn't be observed so well, our coke bottles became Castle Larger bottles, a local brew to Africa. I'll never forget spitting that first sip straight back out, amazed that anyone could like such a bitter taste. But as you do we persevered on, desperate to grow up as fast as we could.
    It only took about a bottle and a half before I was gone. Oh goodness, those were the days. I was conically ill and woke up with the most savage headache, and figured if that was what being drunk was all about you could stick it.
     
    When I was a real little tyke, I recall wanting to be a big guy, and decided that smoking would prove my manliness. Now in Africa, the locals who can't afford cigarettes or tobacco get themselves Tobacco trimmings that are used as a sort of fertiliser for grass and roll up a home made cigarette in newspaper.
    Well as luck would have it, dad got a load of tobacco trimmings at that time for the garden, and I promptly set to work making myself a cigarette. Now truth be told, a cigar maker would have been proud with my effort, as it looked more of that size and shape. I'd used far too much newspaper, and defiantly too much tobacco, but what did I know. Well hell, when I lit that thing it looked like I'd sparked up an inferno. I only got one puff before the flames drove me to abandoning my cigarette to the floor, but it only took one puff to nearly choke the hell out of me, and my incessant coughing only attracted my dad's attention!
    Well, my efforts resulted in my getting a clip around the ear, and my father trooping off to the shops where he bought a pack of cigarettes and then sat me down and told me to smoke one.
    Flummoxed I did as I was told, and brother did I regret it. My throat burned and it tasted like..... I don't know, ash maybe?
    Dad's reasoning was that if I was so desperate to smoke I should do it properly, and in a way it taught me that it wasn't cool! Thanks for that one dad.
     
    And then of course there is that first time you explore sex!
    Oh come on, you can't talk about first times and not think about that time!

    For me it was exploration with a mate of mine at a sleep over at his house. I'm not even really sure I knew that it was all about being with a guy, heck maybe I did, I really don't know. All I do know is that I really wanted to do something.... anything with him.
    So we gave it a go. We started out by playing swords, and that progressed to mutual caressing, rubbing and then an eventual progression to a blow job.
    Now I can't say that it was wild, or amazing, or what I even expected it to be. All I can remember is that it was exciting, felt so naughty, and resulted in a weird feeling of guilt afterwards.
    I was far too young to appreciate the impact of sex, and it was a while before I began to realise that it can make or break a friendship/relationship, but these are the lessons we learn ey.
     
    Last night was a first for me. I broke out into the world of broadcasting in a whole new way, actually being the voice on air for the very first time ever. Wow what an experience. Yes it was only on a test server, and yes it was full of mistakes and imperfections, but wow it was sooooo much fun. I honestly felt like I was 16 again yesterday, and you know what, for a moment that was a really nice feeling.
     
    It's good to think back to all those first time experiences that we have tucked away in our memory vaults. So many great memories and things to share. I got a chance to sit and think about some of them today, and enjoyed doing so. Made me smile about the good times in life. I'm sure you must do the same when you reflect back at some of your First Times.
     
    Thought for today - "A dream is just a dream, a Goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline." Harvey Mackay.
     
    Song for today - Fireflies by Owl City
  22. Yettie One
    We take pleasure in a vintage wine, in a well matured single malt, in a seasoned and well cured cigar or even a well aged cheese. These are all things that through nature improve with age.
     
    Its a well known formula. If its old and well established it has value. A painting by a famous painter, or a medal with a tangible provenance becomes valuable or a building with history becomes a protected/listed building. All these things are improved or enhanced with age, be it their value, the experience or even the concept of the item.
     
    But is this something that we can apply to everything? For example think of a phone, or a computer. Some things are perishable, and others have a sell by or use by date. In these cases it is the reverse, age does not improve the item at hand.
     
    Lets be honest when it comes to good music, how often do we appreciate the older stuff, even as each generation grows up, it is the stuff of the past that we enjoy more. Probably something to do with the memories that the music of our youth invokes.
     
    So age is a double edged sword.
     
    So what happens when we apply age to people? Do we accept that age matures a person just like a fine wine, adding to the value and experience of the person, or are we eternally fixated by the beauty of youth?
     
    This poses a difficult question for society, as it would seem that the predominant trend is to always be looking for the best looking, best features, best results as humans. We jump at cosmetic surgery to maintain our youth, strive to hide our age, lie about who we are and how old we are. Various industries are infamous with their ruthless craving for the young and the beautiful people.
     
    While there are exception to every rule, I'd say that for the majority of our society the beauty of youth is captivating, alluring and poses far too much sway on our system of values. You hear of men "trading" in their wives for a younger model, or a woman being a Cougar and having a younger toyboy.
     
    It makes me giggle sometimes when I think about it. We are never satisfied. But it does make me wonder at times. What is the real fixation with youth. We all grow up, we all get older, we all grow grey hair, get wrinkles and get fatter round the waist. It comes from a natural slow down in our body. Fact of life!
     
    Personally I don't get it. But then maybe that's just me. While its ok to be young and foolish, I do prefer the fact I'm a little wiser, a little more experienced, and a little more capable to survive. Don't get me wrong I still have my crazy moments where I may well seem like a stupid teenager, but overall, I'm glad to be slightly older, slightly more "lived".
     
    Experience has been good to me and I've had a chance to do a lot in life. I've travelled and seen places I can't describe well enough in words. I've made mistakes and lived to learn a lesson. I've loved and lost. These are things I'd not change. If I could go back, it'd probably be too my early 30's once more. Yes there are things I'd have done differently, but over all I enjoyed my youth, and lived it well. The only thing that sometimes frustrates me is that I never really got a chance to come out so to speak.
     
    But while I enjoy chatting to younger people, and love their passion for life, their enthusiasm and excitement for life, I'm glad I don't have so much of the uncertainty, doubt, and craziness of youth to live through anymore. That part of being young is unattractive to me. The indecisiveness, the fickle friendships, the raging arguments, the raging hormones. It makes life unpredictable and weird. There is one thing that is wonderful about it though, it makes for interesting stuff to write about.
     
    This is more of just a rambling blog today, based on something I was reading earlier about man kinds fixation on youth, and how it impacts on the choices people in our society make. It got me thinking about how I view youth. I think I've come to the conclusion that while I can agree that beauty does lie in the youth, inner beauty is far more important and means far more. Beauty goes, character lasts forever.
     
    Thought for today - "Love is the flower you've got to let grow." John Lennon
     
    Song for today - Starlight by Muse http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xsoPsxKVhP4
  23. Yettie One
    As part of my job I am always on the look out for new, original or different music. Variety is the spice of life I am told, and certainly in terms of music, I find that very often a cover version of a song or a remix can add a whole new dimension to our enjoyment of a tune, or turn a song perhaps we didn't like so much into an epic tune we remember for years.
     
    Anyone that knows me really well will know that Coldplay are one of my all time favourite bands. There are a few, who's work I follow passionately, and who's concerts I attend in some kind of groupie mentality! Erm...... No not the kind of groupie for crying out loud!
     
    Actually I am not even sure if there is more than one kind of groupie! Perhaps what I should have said was that I attend as many concerts as I can, as any loyal fan would! Yes.... That sounds much better! Although I won't deny that the idea of a roll in the hay with a few of them wouldn't go amiss!
     
    Alas I digress from my original train of thought.
     
    So yeah, as a massive Coldplay fan, on their release of Paradise, possibly one of my favourite tunes ever, I promptly set out on production of a show that would profile the impact of Coldplay's music on the world, and we undertook a lot of research as a result, interviewing fans, speaking with professionals and industry experts, and looking for unique and interesting covers of Coldplay's work.
     
    Enter Mike Tompkins. In my hunt for something very unique, I came across this guy, and I was instantly amazed by his authentic and completely creative approach to making music. The more I listened to this guys stuff, the more intrigued I became, and the more intrigued I became the more I really liked what I was listening too.
     
    Mike Tompkins is one of those people that takes an art form and pushes the boundaries far beyond the scope of normality and creates something new and beautiful. He's used the concept of beat-boxing and taken it to a whole new level of existence. Some people might suggest that there is nothing fanciful or ingenious about copying another's work, but I'd challenge that. This is not a reproduction with instruments, computers and digital synthesisers. No this is someone recreating something we enjoy with nothing more than his mouth, and doing it really well in my opinion.
     
    Indeed I think the word talented fits well with what Mr Mike Tompkins does. He is providing us with a completely new experience and having a lot of fun along the way. I take my hat off to the guy, and hope that like me, you get as much enjoyment out of taking a listen as I did.
     
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    Thought for today - "Aerodynamically the Bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the Bumblebee doesn't know this, so it continues to fly anyway!" - Mary Kay Ash
  24. Yettie One
    Well joining GA has opened my eyes to a lot of different things, and one of them is the Anthology idea.
     
    So summer 2012 was the first time I actually came across anything of the sort, and if it weren't for Bugeye pointing it out to me, it'd have slipped by unnoticed as I was caught up in reading some of the amazing stories on the site.
     
    But thankfully I was encouraged to give it a whirl and submit an entry.
     
    I actually got a good kick out of giving it a go. It was a lot of fun writing and coming up with something a little different. It took three attempts and two changes to what I was working on, but it was a good experience, and now that the whole thing is out there for everyone to read, I'm fairly happy with the result.
     
    I've taken some time out to read through everyone else's entry the last few days, and realise what an amazing bunch of writers there are on GA. Some of these writers I read for the first time through their anthology submission, others I've checked out in the last few weeks.
     
    But what I can say with absolute certainty is that there are some writers that are solid gold in terms of their content and output.
     
    I really enjoyed reading the various entries and seeing the amazing selection in varied interpretations of the subject. That is the beauty of our individual expression. While it'd be easy to rave about almost all of the submissions, I decided that I'd choose my top three and rave about those, so here is my humble opinion in no particular order:-
     


    The Milner Device - Andy 021278

     
    Caught in a world of post apcolyptic survival, two young people are forced to face a daunting decision that will change their lives forever.
    Andy has a remarkable ability to paint a picture of a future as scary as anything you may have viewed watching any of a number of "end of days" movies I could list. His canvas is filled with simple, eloquent brush strokes that paint us a vivid picture of the devastating consequences of man's overwhelming desire to protect and defend himself against himself. Caught up in these consequences of man's innate ability to destroy everything good are two young people learning to survive against all the odds.
    I really enjoyed this story for two reasons. It's realism is unnerving and presented in simple, yet detailed precision. It's quite disturbing how easily this could come true.
    Secondly it presents a quandary for its central characters that is a fundamental argument of our time. It is one I have sat and debated already with friends over a beer, it is one that our churches struggle with, it is one that society struggles with, and it is woven into the horror of a future world with little hope in such a clever way that show's that even in our future, there is no clear and certain answer to the things that trouble us today.
     


    Should I - CarringtonRJ

     
    If your a fan of thrill and wild rides then this is a story for you. This is a display of skill and writing ability that will take you on a voyage of discovery, passion, confusion and decisions.
    It is the first time that I have ever read a story and been left completely unsure of what I think. It presents a world that few of us have thought about, few of us will ever understand and even less of us will ever be able to so present so carefully, sensitively or creatively.
    CarringtonRJ takes the huge world of sexuality and the overwhelming confusion of desire, lust and sexual identity, throws it in the tumble dryer and pulls a rabbit out of the hat. All while your right there in the middle of the confusion. It is emotional, thought provoking and daunting all at the same time.
    When I was finished reading, I was left with a relief that my life is simple and remarkably straight forward in comparison with the central character of this story. It is an amazing tale of one persons struggle to make the right decisions for themselves in that quest for the illusive happiness of acceptance and identity. If your looking for something intense, then hell this is it!
     


    Murder In The Woods - CassieQ

     
    Nothing to do with what I had imagined this is a story about an individual that has to face his past in order to make his future secure.
    The great thing about this story is subtle build up that takes you up the mountain to the summit and then whips the expectation right out from under you. I love the intensity of the feelings that the writer is able to invoke through a simple yet complex use of word groups that build the scene perfectly for the purposes of this story. I also like the way the expectations that you form are the complete reverse of the reality for the plot, and how while your attention is drawn to things, it is not till the very end that the mist clears and the full picture becomes painfully clear.
     
    I could go on and on about each submission, these are not the only stories that I enjoyed. I wish I could choose them all, but I set myself a task to choose three, and as hard as that was, these I think are them. I do not want to detract from the fine efforts of any of the other writers, or the opinion of anyone else who reads the submissions and has a difference of opinion. I can only thank everyone for providing me with a lot of enjoyment reading some amazing stories, and congratulate you all for your time and effort. I hope everyone else enjoys the anthology as much as I have, and once more thanks to Bugeye for convincing me to take part.
     
    Thought for today - "I just want to be known for things other than my sexuality" - Eva Mendes
     
    Song for today - Proud by Heather Small
  25. Yettie One
    I was finally due an upgrade for my phone which I've probably had too many years to truly consider myself to be trendy. To be honest I am no technophobe, I've just always figured that a phone is to make calls on and maybe send text messages.
     
    Ok maybe a lot to send text messages. Actually I am quite grateful for the 'unlimited' number of text messages that my traffic offers me, as there are times when i can get quite carried away with my textual conversations.
     
    However, I was really quiet stunned when I popped into Carphone Warehouse and took a look at these ultra modern smart phones that everyone wonders around with these days. I was finally tempted to depart the shop with the new Samsung Galaxy Note, a tablet smart phone that is just as good, if not better than my laptop!
     
    Staggering.
     
    How the hell do people come up with this stuff??? I mean, ok granted as a phone it is a little bigger than normal. It's not just pop it into your pocket and forget about it, it is a rather chunky size, the only real draw back I've found with the phone so far.
     
    The screen resolution and the power of the system is amazing to say the least. Hell I can read GA stories on the move on my phone now! How whacky is that. Ok yeah all you people that have been using smart phones for the last god knows how long are rolling your eyes at me now thinking, "God how out of touch are you?"
     
    But that's just it. I didn't really think I was that out of touch. I mean I've only had my old phone for about three years, and I'd stayed with Sony Ericsson who produced a remarkable phone back in the day in my humble opinion. Back then, I didn't really like the idea of a touch screen on a phone. I was always worried that putting it in my pocket would result in dozens of unwarranted calls as it was activated accidentally by the pressures on the screen within my pocket.
     
    But now that I own a smart phone, I have to be honest, I am impressed. I just can't believe how far technology has come, and how quickly it has done it. I mean, lets be fair, it wasn't all that long ago, I was playing around on an Amstrad computer trying to comprehend MS Dos. Now I'm flicking through pages on facebook, tweeting like a preacher on speed and tumbling on a thing called Tumblr.
     
    The net, and the things associated with us in an amazing world of possibility and it has inspired mankind to become a global network of friends, family and colleagues. If this is what 2012 brings in terms of technological capability, I really do wonder what 2050 will look like.
     
    Hmmmmmmmmmm
    Does that mean a Terminator like future could become a reality????
    Oh how the imagination runs amok!
     
    Thought for today - "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." - Abraham Lincoln
     
    Song for today - Eli Eli by Chimora http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JFhw-uEdak
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