Cannd

I like this story so far. I hope to learn more about both of their people. We get an idea, but some history and what is the winterblade would be great. Why are the hunters able to heal so quickly? Are the other guardians usually so fast or Is that just alec? I'm also wondering about this bloodlust thing...is it psychological or something more ..the need to kill another guardian? are their any legends about a guardian/hunter getting together? Looking forward to more!

I really think getting a beta reader would help you smooth things out a lot. I think there are just some troubles with continuity and stuff like transitions that maybe could be smoothed out to make it a better read. wouldn't the 'pack' have been watching enough to know a home had been blown up in town...and oh it was his right next to where he was found. Also, this white wolf mentions his parents but not his little brother and he doesn't mention the kid either.

he's been missing for 24 hours and hasn't called his parents. beta readers can catch stuff like that so it doesn't seem unrealistic with little details missing. And how do you just leave it as 'oh you're a werewolf..and here is a pb&J...come back tomorrow? come on...this kid would be going nuts and asking questions.

Odd odd more odd... Ok, I don't know how he was left by both of the supernaturals, including Dash, but from there you kinda went unrealistic when he ended up with this family. I might overlook not calling an ambulance to help the kid in the middle of the road with wounds. But, then you keep him for dinner and a sleepover and don't have him call his parents. that's just ridiculous. This kid called his dad to say he was staying late to study b/c he had to cover his meeting with dash so I'd think he'd call after he'd disappeared. What parents wouldn't tell the kid to immediately let their parents know he's okay? The kid is his age and doesn't look familiar? so where is he? wouldn't Adam be in his school?

I agree with :Paladin....but what is it that Carlin is hiding....Alex is finally happy and he sees what a good man alex is ...if it will blow his life apart or theirs as a couple, I hope he outs it sooner rather than later. A shame Alex didn't arrive for the 'shaming' and that Jezebel is a sick fuck. but really, did anybody question a tiny boy being an assassin? though the kid has promise it seems!! Ugg that Ysabelle is a real wing-nut! lol They don't spare the sick fun when they execute someone huh!

oh im soooo happy for luca. I only hope you can convincingly show us how he will escape a carriage surrounded by soldiers...unless it is sent to Mikhail or somebody who will listen and then stab or it is received by the family....he can jump up like from a cake! ....it will be a bit harder to get out than in I suppose. I can't wait to see alexander's surprise when he gets to the house...hopefully safely. that will be a rough trip though. How long does it take for a group to get there...how will he do it? food, bathroom, etc...dangerous trip. too bad he didn't keep that knife. ysabella is a real fun character. I love how the mention of the family she is away from makes her crazy act up...yet you don't know if that is a protective instinct or is it the reminder she's not there? I find I like her strangely. I feel so badly for Talia....what the fuck is up with the general? Is this part of whatever plan he has for Alex? does he need her free to go with him? is it payback for not being married off. or is it his anger at his wife and his inability to deal with her that is letting him take it out on his daughter who is apparently like her, minus some crazy. this is like cutting her hand off in this society to treat her this way. I'd like to think his wife would come back and slice his balls off with her claws for what he's doing, but it will still be a while before she can. Damn! Really, I like Talia and it seems that even if she goes and captures a bigger kingdom for the nation, she still will have this black eye. What does he have to gain by disgracing his own blood? it seems like it goes against the whole family. I hope Alex goes in angry and gets something out of his father. Esp, since I don't want to see that little witch cousin best her. And why aren't the family members a bit more worried about her? They know that family connection mean nothing in this society. brothers or not, the General must worry about the threat of secrets going back to them. I'd love it if we could get a better idea of what the general is like, like we have gotten a few glimpses of his wife. It seems like even the kids barely know him, but with how much control he has over their lives, it would be nice to get a better look at who he is and what drives him from interactions between him and someone else, esp with relation to his kids. I kinda hate to have these new characters, Alex's new guards, thrown in when things were just starting to heat up with the boys. I guess they'll still have time together, but they'll be busy training the others and such.

I hated seeing Jack die. But, shouldn't the kid, who'd endured so much already, thought that the beating he received from that guy would be nothing compared to the one he'd get from Meko just for losing him the money? I agree with Luca that I don't think it was really about how much money was brought in. Afterall, it would make sense to let the kid earn the money he could till the end of the week and then do his damage for the slight and lost money. Getting off for that scott free seemed unlikely. Someone wrote 'I'm glad Luca is free now' ...I really think he is far from that! He has to find Ysabelle first. I think her respect for a young assassin might just save him...that along with the fact that it might look like that one noble did it ..though I can't see one doing it over a dead 'whore' being believable. The only thing I felt like was off was that it took so long for Luca to get the knife out. I would have thought that Jack being hurt at all would have caused him to do it. He was daydreaming about doing it for no reason and he'd be thinking of the horrible jobs and beatings and almost strangling and the sounds of those other prostitutes dying would have been echoing in his ears. but, most of all, this boy he'd taken under his wing and who he'd sworn to protect was dying. He should have done it sooner. I know you didn't have a choice since he couldn't have gotten away with a bloody boy, let alone convinced the Demon to help him. I loved how you said that the voice telling him to run sounded like Jack's and the others he'd watched die. I am thrilled to see Alex coming into his own and taking some joy in his life. He's also giving joy clearly not that way...I mean by giving the guys a chance to go to the graduation and such. I can understand the dilemma he has in that he wants to submit to carlin and sleep with him, but he's been brainwashed all his life you don't put yourself at the mercy of another and you don't submit. I hope he can see past those things and just be with his cute tomacian. I agree he better get his own entourage soon b/c guards that belong to his father could be dangerous! Though any guards would be better than none with that Jezebel around! Should keep getting interesting

Hmmm interesting beginning. Left me with some questions...like how does he have a cousin...aren't they not related? Or was Luca supernatural also? should be interesting. why will he go home and what will he confess? will it be loving luca? is luca even available? good beginning.

vampires are great any time of year....caught things one almost a year later....it is great and i'm glad I got to it, even if late. I can't understand how I missed it. But, I have to thank your muse since ending where you originally did would have SUCKED and not in a good vampy way I loved the ending.

I didn't get to read all the comments so if someone else asked, i'm sorry, but why not tell us if they doubled his powers or not? beautiful story....I just wanted to see the ending ya know?

I agree with faxity, it was nice to get a confirmation that Talia is firmly on her brother's side, as I hoped/suspected. It is just hard to be sure in a family like that. I just need to know...isn't it possible for the Tomacian to someday be worthy of Alex? Isn't it a society where you can work your way up to the top with the war games? so couldn't he be put in the games by alex (I'm still unsure how someone can be put in at the end of the month like Alex was and not have beat others on their way and be considered worthy) Could Carlin ever be an option for Alex? He is strong enough, especially with the training of Alex, to do some damage like his master! You did an awesome job in doing the 'first' for alex and the build-up between these two was enough that we were waiting for the tension to break between them finally! It was really well-done...hot and sweet at the same time. Look forward to more....love this story.

it has been a a brilliant tool for you guys to use ....these shorts to give us further time with our favs. I'm so glad to get a chance to see Avery starting his new life. I like that you show it's not some auto-fix, to be put in a loving home with a boyfriend of your dreams. he still has a lot to overcome and you showed him make a step forward in this limited length of a story. I thought you did an awesome job of it. it was really well-balanced! bring 'em on! look forward to more of these guys!

I got through the brutality, though it was hard, hoping he'd have the guys find him. Afterall, they knew who was a problem for him. I kept waiting for a wolf to come tear him apart or something. Didn't he look for the letters on his chest though? When he saw he looked different, did they stay? Is he still bleeding or did becoming fae heal those things? Is the pain due to damage done to him by Lester or his body changing? What started the change? Was it his being so brutalized or was it just going to happen eventually? Lots of questions. My biggest one was why we haven't heard him dying over what he would have felt coming off of Lester with his ability? I thought he'd be near dying with all the evil coming off that man, but it was like his empathic powers were shut down. I expected maybe the pain would be a break from what he'd be feeling being near that excuse of a human, but it seemed to not be an issue. Well, I am really excited about this. I hope his Guy is there soon to care for him! And that the other two can come b/c they know more about what is going on with him. they all must be looking for him by now! I hope that monster is dead. I knpw he was in too bad of shape to worry, but I'd have wanted to be sure the bastard was dead, after all he'd done to him and now all he was sure he'd done to others. I wish we could have seen him go crazy on him!!! Can't wait for more! Glad you're writing again!!!

Congrats on the rating...and the cute guy! Who are we get in the way of that!? I do hope you remember us though, those of us vicariously living through your story But, really, the story is really great. You're doing a good job of developing their relationship...and just as good a job with luca and poor Jack. I was so upset by your saying they had children as young as 6 in he whore houses and yet the people in important positions must know this and allow it to happen? SICK!! and the beating he's giving the 'loser' at the end of the weak. God I hope Luca goes for it at some point. I hope he can save Jack, though if jack ends up losing, it might just bring an end to Meko. I only hope Luca can escape if that happens. It is a horrible situation. I am a bit scared of that horrible cousin of theirs visiting. I'd not be surprised though if their mom gives jezebel an assassination order of her own family. Actually, as crazy as she is, I very much hope she sees the risk involved in that little power hungry bitch visiting. She is very much like her afterall, and would be best suited to noticing the risk. I feel like Alex has the right people around him, but she is still dangerous. I'd not want drink anywhere near her during a meal! I am thoroughly confused by alex's change in behavior. I didn't expect him to just smile after he was kissed again and defeated. What's going on in his mind? I really would love his POV. I'm glad he's still cool with him. I'd have liked to see them acting as friends, doing something like going out to hang out for a drink. I think that would give us a better view of the relationship than just getting a passing sentence about them having some other facet to the relationship than the practice yard. so, maybe let us see that side of it? You gave me a good laugh with the comment about Talia, "but he still felt she could use a few hobbies that didn’t involve sharp objects." I'd be a bit worried about her 'wickedly' looking down after what she'd seen. I know she loves her brother though and I don't think she'd wish him harm if he was happy for once.

I don't think much of Ysabel. man, what a mom of the year she is. a knife to the throat for not answering her as enthusiastically as she'd like! How did he expect to live if she didn't approve of what had happened to him? She's a moody one huh! Not trusting that Jezebel either. I loved her aunt's comment about her beauty followed up by 'the cunt'. They both are charmers . I find Alex to be perfectly adorable I'm glad that his father was pleased by his actions...his big plan! lol. I just hope no one heard his confession To Carlin. I think those two are great as a pair. He would be a fitting partner for Alex. Not only is he able to hold his own on the battlefield with him, but he is good at lightening up Alex's 'darkness.' It is just a shame he wasn't able to be in the games too and win his freedom so he could do something to make him a possible fit. Sadly, I assume as a slave he has no way of being with Alex, no matter what a good fit he may be. I wonder what Carlin's plan is. I'm still wondering what happened with Luca. I just hope he was okay.

I k now those characters often speak to you guys huh! That was some entertaining show! I love how you had him use that move and kill that stupid warrior who was such a stud the night before. Kinda funny. I kinda figured he'd have to get a red/black smock somehow. I hope he is able to get Luca out of that brothel. We shall see. I am really loving this story. Looking forward to more

lmao I love how he's missing Alex. The picture of him running around being targeted by the sister's knives is pretty funny. I can't believe that Alex feels he must win his freedom rather than use his name to escape it. the whole scene in that first room was pretty wild! That is a dangerous guy who can kill 3 men while strapped to a chair. Good chapter

Overall, great to see a 'happy' ending. I think there might be a small part to go though.. you are so good at responding to your many greedy readers' desires --which I think is super -- that I hope you will consider a small epilogue... but overall, a beautiful wrap-up on this difficult story to read and I'm sure write too. I thought the statement about it also taking 'a whole town to fail a child' was very poignant. I really liked that. If it sticks with one reader who speaks up someday to help someone and makes them not be one of the eyes that turns the other way waiting for another person to stand up then you will have made a big difference as well as entertained us. Maybe you helped someone who wasn't saved, but who grew up with or is dealing with abuse, realize it wasn't their fault. Writing something like this can make a difference and I hope it has, in addition to being a great story to read. I thought that having matt's POV was powerful. It didn't add that much to what we knew had happened, but I wanted to know how he felt facing this horrible situation. I felt like you did a great job with Matt, the doctor and travis getting Avery to admit what he'd gone through. I think the most powerful scene by far, was when Avery was waking up. When he couldn't quite respond yet, but was hearing his 'secrets' that he'd fought all those years to hide being read out like a laundry list. It was so sad. Then when the fate of his mom was added and here he had to deal with the joy of knowing it wasn't just that she walked away from him and didn't look back. I think you did help by adding his newer memories of unrest right before she left which gave us a reason why she left. It was sad for him to have to realize his mom died, but feel joy that she loved him. It hit you that he had been trained to feel things were all his fault b/c he right away felt like it was his fault she died b/c she was coming back for him. Maybe he can go see the man who she loved and who is in his own hell someday when he's ready (maybe in an epilogue? One thing is, he never told the sherriff about is the final blow of his father wanting to sell him for 2mil.. He was telling it all so why not that? I think that has to be added. I feel like the ending was sweet. The view of Matt holding him and knowing he had Matt. I guess I'd love to see an epilogue though. It doesn't feel totally finished. I'd love to have him exiting the hospital with the light on his face and his hand in matt's and knowing his life can go on from here. I'd love for him to know that William is in jail too and that his crimes are in the light. There will be support maybe through the word of the butler (who belongs in jail too in the opinion many of us, but who didn't legally commit the crime ) I hope you can consider writing that epilogue. either way, :thankyou:thanks for giving us such an emotional and well-written ride. I have to ask, what draws you to the angst that you've written in the last two stories. It has to be tough to write these types of scenes/storylines. Inquiring minds want to know

Sadly, I think Matt is too impulsive to wait to go through the police. And we all know the police rarely get there that quickly, though it might have been longer than we thought. I think it is important to note that so many people are abused, possibly even someone reading this, though by this point, it probably would have been too much for them. I think it is important to be one of the more aware people who unlike the people around Avery. And more than aware, you have to be willing to go to the ground and fight for someone who may not even want the help themselves sometimes. But, in this case, when it is a child, there isn't a distance too far. I hope you don't let him return to that bastard's house. wow! there are no ends to the depth of depravity his father will go to. I don't think he'd be a match for Matt. Matt is not only big, but he's a man, not a child. His father will cower from a real adult and not a female or child. I'm sure the right female would make him cower. I'd still like to know a bit about his mom's history. I think I saw some info in the response to a comment. I do wonder if the father abused her or not. It is possible the eleven y/o Avery would have missed signs, especially since his mother loved him dearly and likely would have hid it from him. But, in his memory she seems genuinely happy and maybe a mother can be with her child in her arms. But, if it were getting bad enough to leave the child there, then I'd think there would have been something that the astute Avery would have seen in hindsight. Then again, the mind is a powerful thing and we remember things the way we need to sometimes. This man who raped his son six months after his mother left didn't just snap and become that. He had to have had these sadistic tendencies. I hope that Avery will be strong enough to press charges against his father and William. My fear is that a man with enough money to threaten his butler into silence (I'd like to know what would keep him working there even if he is unable to tell anyone about what that man does) and buy a child for 2 million can hire someone to shut poor Avery up. You can't say that bastard father isn't smart. Here he planted all these seeds so that people would believe his story. It would have possibly worked or still could if someone doesn't rescue him...you did promise so I am able to go on till tomorrow lol Matt and he have a road ahead. Matt will have to be strong. they're at such a tender point in their relationship and Avery is so very damaged. he's been told he's going to be sent to that monster. his father is a gem compared to him. Why wouldn't he take a chance and ask for help? I can't imagine with the hope of Matt on the horizon that he wouldn't try one more time to avoid what he barely lived through the first time. It just felt wrong...esp since he had thoughts of maybe someone would help. Maybe the cop didn't quite believe his dad. Maybe Matt could love him. I just hope they have something real that won't be based on Matt's strong need to love and protect and conquer demons. I hope it can be a true two-sided relationship, but it will take time.

I agree you put I detail but didn't make it feel extraneous or boring. Enjoying the start to the story.

Ok, I think you should take the time to get a beta reader to go over it. They can give you the feedback and help you work through things before you put out the chapter. yes, people have to wait for it a bit longer (not too much...if you sent it to me, I'd be done quickly if you go by the chapter) and you could turn it around in a similar amount of time. I still think there were other things in this chapter that had to be worked out. I think it would have been good to reach out to the person who said they were in law enforcement so you could ask how they'd handle that. They wouldn't have stopped till they talked to the kid and they woulda gone to the father. they wouldn't have stopped with Matt. they'd have the kid's father's name/location. Matt was too observant to not be suspicious of all this. He's older. He'd know this baggy, turtleneck covering every inch of his body thing, along with soreness could mean something. He loves this kid. I just think he'd be getting suspicious by now. I also think Matt squeezed him in a hug and there is no way that kid wouldn't have yelped after the abuse done to him. he'd also have had to lose weight. I guess flu could explain that. It seems odd that it doesn't' even cross his mind that he can get help from Matt. I do see how he could be so programmed since he was 11 when this started that telling someone will result in punishments. it is clear he trusts him. he knows matt cares more than just a passing friend and I think this would be too important to avoid getting sent back to that sadistic fuck for him to continue to hide this. Maybe the weather will be like it has been here, in NJ, and it will be warm enough for a t-shirt the next day and he'll still be in a turtleneck. Won't it seem weird he wears only turtlenecks all week? Come on people!!! (Going crazy ) I know you worked hard on it. I think a beta reader could help you focus on the exact spots that need some tweaking. You certainly don't have to take all their advice. I just think you'd be happier than having all these beta readers lol (in the form of all the commenters). I love the story. I want to see it hold water in all parts. Think about it and consider doing that. You certainly have enough people who are invested to find a beta reader or use ones you have already (lol ). Lookin' forward to the next chapter!!!

I don't think it's unlikely that he wasn't on the line long enough to get a trace. Please God, let the sherriff get the message and hear Avery and know it's got to be Avery and he should go to question him. And kid, you just heard you'll be sent back, so if he doesn't go to Matt or not lie to the police.....there I proof on your body, plenty of it, then I don't get it. It's not like he has Stockholm syndrome with Deglassio. He may not think they'll believe him but iwht those wounds...you can't explain that away as well as choke marks. So he better tell someone or I will be convinced he's stupid. Actually, I'd think he'd want to prevent himself from dying possibly the next time. He'd have to be scared enough! So please don't have him hide it ....it wouldn't fit well for me!!!

is this a part A only? do we get to find out where they end up? why leave a big job with a corner office and a job Clem liked? Esp when they had friends they didn't want to leave like Suki and her hubby and the other guys and Madison? I thought he didn't get on with his dad or something, so missing his parents would make him go? I hope you give us more about their decision and show us where they end up....but I'm just glad they're together and so in love. it has been a great story.

I was so happy to see an update!!! Glad you're back. I know you wanted to get to it when you could. I was actually happy to see one thing in this chapter. Nate is usually a hothead. He was smart to realize he has to bide his time and wait for the right moment. You did an amazing job showing the insanity in Lester. The way you wrote the first paragraph or two was just genius. I really was unsure if we were in a flashback in moments the way you made the picture of him in the towels like a little boy. but, the sick point is that Lester sees him like that I think, in certain moments. He's so dangerous b/c he has moments of seeing him like his 'little boy' (that he molests) at moments and then is so sadistic. You showed that well here. I am not a fan of that type of stuff and I hate these types of things happening to characters I like, but I understand that you have to go there sometimes as an author. lol my favs like Nephy first and then jay (roughboys) and craftingmom and others who are sooo good at torture have started to get me more able to take it as part of the development of the story, but it's still sucks sometimes, so I know where ladyde is coming from. you get attached to characters and then don't want to have to read it. I have to say, I think that several more chapters of this could be a turnoff though. I hope that it isn't too much more. I hope it doesn't happen this way but I wonder if it will bring a change in him for the worse. I'm afraid that it will make that one part of him that I had a rough time with sometimes, worse. he's sometimes so edgy with people he loves. It's clearly a tool to keep them back and if they don't get in they won't hurt him. I'm so afraid this is going to make that worse or break him. I hope it doesn't do either. I want him to be able to embrace those three men who love him, obviously with the werewolf being his main squeeze. Takashi and his little fae are perfect for each other. The four should be very close though, for always well, those are my hopes and dreams for Proph. hope to see more soon and hope you are well, robin.

you fucking loser...like he cant go to the damn police. the butler is worse than the monster he works for. there is nothing I could be threatened with to have me let that go on if any chance to get cops to the person in trouble and your family were possible. his father is the biggest monster of them all. Where is the phone? call for help as soon as you can avery. please don't have him decide to let this be his life. next he won't be allowed to go to school. ahhhh you are mean!