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DaveinLA

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  1. DaveinLA

    Chapter 3

    I know I am a little late coming to the tale of "Perry and Jesse". When I have finished it, I will most likely write a review and explain why I am so late. However, my comment here is that Underthehoodster nearly lost me on this chapter. I would not have been able to abide Perry cheating on Jesse with Tom. But, the great thing is that the author proved how much of a great storyteller he is by not letting that happen! Way to go, Underthehoodster!!
  2. Derry and Caleb - Cally, for short - are two pretty normal 15 year olds who live on adjacent properties and have become best friends...well, better than best friends! During a summertime frolic playing a boisterous game of hide and seek in the high grass of Derry's grandfather's field, they discover a mysterious place that holds a powerful secret. Apparently, intentionally covered up and hidden, the place hold what the boys discover to be passageways or "doors" that lead to far-distant places. One of those places is a nexus point that holds many of such passageways - thousands or maybe millions of them. Let the adventures begin! The author has put an entirely new spin on the idea of instant travel to far distant places. He has presented it by allowing his very real and believable characters discover this secret in a fun and exciting way. They bring one other person into the fold of this secret which is far too big to allow anyone on earth to discover - but they discover others in their travels and explorations. There are many elements to creating truly great stories. The author has to create actions - happenings - that are exciting enough to make the reader feel as if he or she is actually a part of those actions. The author must use language to paint graphic images in the readers' minds. The author must have enough sense of timing to pace the action well enough to allow the readers to ride the story at an appreciative rate. But, to me, the most important thing an author must do is create characters that are believable. Not always likable, but believable. The greatest tribute a reader gives to an author is laugh when his characters laugh and to cry when his characters are sad! Geron Kees has created such characters. I even love his not-so-human characters and the ones made of material other than flesh and blood! Thank you Mr. Kees for gifting us with the "Doorways" adventures. Thank you for an imagination that can create such tales, but mostly thank you for all the hard work that it takes to bring these stories to this forum. Dave
  3. DaveinLA

    Chapter 13

    Another terrific installment to the "Doorways" adventures. I have many comments - but I am going to put them in a review. I do have two questions, though...First - did the 'translator' implants that Difris installed allow them to read the labels on the cans in the mound? Secondly, when are they going to bring Nyf home with them so that he and Difris can learn what life is like for Cally and Derry? Geron, great job! Thank you for all your hard work! Davey
  4. DaveinLA

    Chapter 1

    Geron - You did it, again! What a concept! And now, little Robot AI's that are prohibited from traversing through the 'doors' are creating their own 'kids' to traverse in their stead! Wow! Wonderful! Davey
  5. DaveinLA

    Chapter 1

    Hi, Geron - Obviously I am late to this party - but the idea for "The Odd, Onward Door" is absolutely awesome. The way you presented a hidden doorway to be found by two exploring teens as a gateway to a "doorway terminal" is just ingenious. Difris - the lonely, intelligent caretaker - is a spark of genius. As with your other works, it is skillfully crafted with few of those grammatical and typographical errors that make reading a chore at times. You are a true wordsmith of the highest order. And, man! Did you provide a framework for myriad tales of the adventures through the doorway terminal! Thank you for all your hard work. I am racing to the second installment! Davey
  6. I have to confess - I love teenaged angst. But with that confession I will also confess that authors who fill their stories with poetry and song lyrics make me crazy because I am not a big fan of either. But you managed to fill this story with a great portrayal of teenaged angst as well as use poetry and lyrics to a great advantage as you so masterfully penned the tides of emotions discovered by Jesse and Maxie. All of the truly great stories are made so by the portrayal of their characters and you have made your readers know your characters in this story. I was angry when Maxie was mad. I felt loss when Jessie was sad. I laughed with them and cried with them. I do not know what higher praise could be offered an author than the reader's tears as one of their characters cries. Davey
  7. DaveinLA

    Chapter 28

    Wow, Mr. Delport - just Wow! I enjoyed this story on several different levels. I loved your characters and you made them so real - even Rascal and the little ones. You just simply allowed me as a reader to seem to know your characters as if I could pick up my Cell Phone and call one and say, "Hi! It's me....." Secondly - although I have been to Kenya, I know little of South Africa and you exposed us to so much Geography, many local customs and the Food - OMG - I opened a notepad file and started making notes to look up and try recipes. Thirdly I am madly in love with yachts and sailing vessels - and you described not only the sailing of the Cat, but the operation of the large motor yacht with wonderful detail and great accuracy. A zillion thanks to you for all your hard work that you so painfully put into "Never Walk Alone"! All of us should be thankful to an author who is willing to work to give us such an enjoyable and readable story. Davey
  8. DaveinLA

    Ford Ch 1

    This is a good story. But....I wish Robert were my uncle! Davey
  9. DaveinLA

    Chapter 86

    CL - you always produce such brilliant characters and describe their life in such a way that we - your readers - can share your characters' lives. This was an enjoyable story and I rejoiced in the lives that Brad helped to save and improve. Thank you for all the hard work you put into this for us. A zillion thanks to you. Dave
  10. DaveinLA

    Rant and Rave

    This was a great, fun as it can be, read! Thank you Lugh for your hard work! Davey
  11. DaveinLA

    Chapter 18

    Again, I am years behind this. But why doesn't someone have Dr. Cole's Cell Number? Why doesn't someone demand that Dr. Cole authorize what is happening? Why doesn't someone challenge Nurse All In Charge? What is wrong with these people?
  12. DaveinLA

    Chapter 17

    I have said before - I realize I am years late in this....but why doesn't Angel have his OWN security guards at his door?
  13. DaveinLA

    Chapter 5

    Well. Finally.
  14. DaveinLA

    Chapter 4

    I realize my comment is about six years too late - but I don't understand. At that level of our stratified society - why doesn't Angel already have about 100 of his own lawyers (solicitors) crawling all over his non-related guardian's affairs and making sure his parents will is being adhered to by the absolute most strict standards it could be? Why doesn't he have his own bodyguards living with him and watching so carefully that Charles, Henry and Annabelle are almost scared to walk down a corridor of the hallowed family manor?
  15. A Review of Crosscurrants, by Adam Phillips DaveinLA Let me start this review by saying that this story is so far out of the genre of stories that I normally read that the difference is the distance between US Coastlines. Crosscurrants is the story of Andy and Matt who met when they were eight years old. Andy's home has his College Professor Father, His working mother and a younger brother and sister - all who have an almost idyllic family life. Matt lives with his mother and Andy realizes that there are pictures of an older boy and a man in Matt's house. Soon into their little-boy relationship, Andy learns from overhearing his parents talking that Matt had an older brother who was abducted, sexually molested and killed. After those events, the father just gave up and walked away, leaving Matt and his Mom alone. Andy not only vows, but promises Matt that he will never let anyone hurt him again. And the story rockets off like the biggest, most twisted rollercoaster you have ever ridden. Adam is a master wordsmith at illuminating the emotions and hidden thoughts of his characters. Eight-year-old Andy is a self-possessed and determined little boy. He lets his self-endowed responsibility of protection of Matt become so important that it shapes his life. This self acquired responsibility shapes his life sometimes for the betterment of his world and sometimes in ways that inflict punishment on himself and others. Matt, however, is the penultimate example of a little boy who has not only accepted the ill occurences in his life, but has turned them into a philosophy that allows him to be remarkably self possessed and thoughtful. He detests bullies, he is popular and never lets those less popular feel as if he is better than him. There is one constant, though - from eight years old, Matt and Andy love each other. Ferociously. Though both are straight as they can be, making early sexual conquests and following up with many others, they never let others get between them. Until.... This is one of the most emotional and emotionally charged reads I've read in a long time. From the Prologue to the Epilogue (there are 37 chapters including those two), I cried, I yelled, I was angry, I was ready to murder Adam's characters. But there were also places where I was delighted, laughed and was fulfilled beyond belief. I can count on my fingers and toes the number of net authors who have the craftmanship to write words that can shine the lights on various characters that elicit those emotions. Adam Phillips has done a superb job giving his readers such expansive insight into the thoughts, actions, reactions and events that cause his characters own actions. He also built a well-crafted story, using great characters inside a well-painted setting to bring the reader to a conclusion that satisfies all of the threads within the story. Well Done, Adam Phillips. Thank you for the hard work and effort you put into painting Crosscurrants for us to share. We - the readers here - will never be able to fully thank you and the other authors for such hard and great work.
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