xander

I like watching Miami Ink on TLC, and I've seen various people get a tattoo as a tribute to a loved one or pet, and I've seriously thought about getting a tattoo on my left arm, depicting Xander and Oreo (she's our Shih-tzu) when one day they go to the big dog house in the sky . I know it's a long way away for Xander hopefully, but Oreo is kinda getting up there and I just love both those dogs to death, and when they die, which like I said hopefully isn't for a looooooong time, I'd like to have a tribute to them always with me. Ronnie

Aww, I missed it . Happy Belated 41st Birthday James!! Hope it was a great one! Ronnie PS...I saw that Joey said "41st" but under your avatar in another post, it said you were 42 so...no matter how old ya are, I hope it was great .

Okay, so I havent been that close to my mom for the last year, year and a half for various reasons. First, about a year or more ago, my mom and stepdad had separated, and I was fine with this, because I hated the f**ker's guts and he was just a sick weirdo. Well my mom was thinking about getting back together with him and I'm not trying to be the 'kid who rules my mom's life', it's just that he was a sicko and an asshole...hell he left her in the hospital when she had blood clots in her legs a few years ago, and she was stupid and got back together with him then ...so I wouldnt give her hugs or hardly have anything to do with her when she was seeing him again and I told her if he moved back in and she got back together with him a third time that I would move out and Justin said that they would take me in, had I needed the place to stay. So she finally came to her senses and they got the divorce finalized and we're done with the f**ker. Then, she's going through menapause right now and it is almost completely unbareable to live with her. I mean she just rants and rants about the most minor things....one of us goes to the bathroom and we forget and leave the light on..."GOD DAMN, SON OF A BITCH!!! f**kING SHUT THE LIGHT OFF!!! ARE YOU PAYING THE f**kING UTILITY BILL!?! YA f**kING WILL BE IF YOU GUYS KEEP LEAVING THE LIGHT ON!!" She does this with like everything! We make a sandwich and havent gotten a chance to put the bread away....she bitches....we go outside and leave the door open like 2 inches...she bitches...I can barely handle it, it's just so stressful living with her. I spend most of my time in my room for that reason, because I'm trying to get away from it all. Then, lots of times she tries to fight with me, and I don't like to fight with her... I mean I dont start fights but if she hits me for no reason, I'm not gonna just stand there and let her hit me and I'll hit her back. And then, like my brother, she has this attitude where she always has to get the last punch in, and so until my brother pulls her away, we keep at it, lol. Then when she 'gets hurt' (I've never really hurt her, maybe made her arm a little red...she's done worse that that to me) under her own fault, she calls up my aunts and uncles and stuff and tell them that I'm abusing her and more or less what a bad kid I am and they believe her. But they also know what a psycho bitch she is most of the time, so I don't know if they believe her 100%. One of the most prominant reasons why I havent been close with her is because of her gay-bashing remarks and attitude. It hurts me each and every time she says something like "I think it is just disgusting!" or something like it, and I know that I havent told her yet or maybe given her a chance to understand, but this is just showing me how she really feels and I doubt after I DO tell her, someday if EVER, she'll have changed, she'll just be in sense wearing a mask, covering up how she really feels to put on a good show. In fact, I've kinda prepared myself for telling her in my days of becoming further and further away from her, especially after she tells my aunts and stuff 'what a bad kid I am'....one day I told her that I don't care at all what she thinks of me. I honestly feel that way...her opinion of me means nothing to me nowadays. If she wants to think good of me, that's fine, but I wouldn't care at all if she thought I was the most dispicable person in the whole world. And this also will help me if I ever come out to her, because if she still has that gay-bashing, gay-hating attitude, or even an insincere 'supportive' mask, it means nothing to me. The people who I would feel disappointed or let down if they freaked out or had a negative reaction about it would mainly be Justin, my friend Meghan, and a few friends that I met through the musical. I know that I prolly sound like an asshole when I say this, but she's caused me to feel this way. So the reason I'm complaining and going on and on about this is this...she has a thing with hugs. She wants a hug from me like every night and I find myself subconsciously getting mad at her and pushing her away when she wants a hug from me and deep down, I guess it's because I know she doesnt approve of gays and that pisses me off and so I don't want her giving me a hug. It's not her lack of acceptance that makes me do this, it's how she can be a regular old bitch to me and say shit about gays, if it comes up, one minute, then want a hug from her GAY son, the next. So last few nights she's been coming in here and giving me a half hug and I've been tolerating it, but she had been a bitch last night and I had been thinking about it and she comes in and puts her arm around me and I push her away and got mad at her. Then she being emotional, started in crying and asking me why I do this to her...that everybody needs hugs and shit. I like hugs , just not from her right now. Then she asked me if there was something that she's doing or something that she did that makes me not want to give her hugs and I actually thought about telling her right then and there that I was gay, but I wasnt ready for it and I was mad. So today she told me that I couldnt take her (it's actually in my name thank you very much ) van to work if I didn't tell her what the problem was and she didnt want to let me go without telling her first and it took about 5 minutes for her to comprehend that it's not something that we can talk about in 5 minutes. She hasnt brought it up since this morning and I'm kinda contemplating about telling her. I mean, I'd like to be close to my mom like I used to be, and I guess it WOULD be better to have an accepting mom than a non, even though it doesnt matter to me. But I just don't think I'm ready. I mean, I know a few guys here that are out to there mom already but theyre mom's have open minds, unlike mine, and from what I understood, are supportive. Hell, my mom would probably have a nervous breakdown and then I'd be at fault for her having a heart attack, lol. I dunno guys...another thing is that I kinda wanted to tell the people I'm the closest to first, like Justin, before I told her. And I know Viv's been hounding me to tell Justin that I'm gay so that I can get over him, like has been long needed, but I just don't have it in me, and I would probably break down crying to him I spose . What do you guys think?.... Ronnie

Hmm, I thought I would have seen thee "Lurker" answering to her name in here . Welcome! But, what's with the goat? Up on that toolbar, where it says "Logged in as: (your name)", off to the right, click "My Controls", then when that page loads, on the menu to the left, under Personal Profile, click "Edit Avatar Settings". Then you can select one, upload one, or link one from another site . Ronnie

Yeah, what Vic said!! Happy Birthday!! Ronnie

Happy Birthday Jas!! Welcome to the 17 y/o club! Hope you have a great day! Ronnie

Hey Kevin!! Happy 1st Anniversary!! You've really made GA a smiley-er place. I appreciate your advice and comments you write in my blog and think that you're a super great person . We're all glad to have you here!! Ronnie

Happy Birthday Rekop!! Ronnie

Well Jayne and Oreo got some too , but it's his cake and I worked hard on it, so that's just gonna be his meal for the next few days....give him about 10 minutes with it each feeding time, lol.... Well I like watching the show Good Eats on Food Network and thanks to it have learned a great deal of science behind food and just worked from that. I wanted the dog food to be the basis of it, and had I just added water, it would have just baked back into a sheet of dog food, so to give it moisture and softness in the final product, I added the eggs, butter and milk and for some structure in the cake, it needs flour, and dogs cant have All Purpose so I used whole wheat. The peanut butter in the cake was for a little more flavor. Hehe, I should post this in some dog forum or something.... Ronnie

Hehe, thanks everyone!! I had a great day...my mom dragged me out of bed to hear my name on the radio station, lol, then I went back to bed cuz I stayed up kinda late....then I went outside and took pictures of Xander and his cake and a few with me and him, and he was getting frustrated by time I was done and finally gave it to him. I expected him to devour it like he does everything else....when I buy him an ice cream cone, he bites off the entire top ice cream layer of the cone in the first bite!! Talk about brain freeze! But he just ate it nice and slow, spending the first 10 minutes licking peanut butter off of it....then in an attempt to get the peanut butter off of his tongue, the little shit came and licked my face and leg and my camera to get it off! So then we had pizza, then I walked Xander out like 3-4 miles to my friend Casey's house and sadly he had to finish mowing the neighbors lawn and then leave so I didnt get to see him that much. Then I called for my dad to come pick us up cuz I didnt feel like walking back, lol. Then I came home and got ready and we went out to eat at Applebee's and I invited Justin along and me and him had fun messing around with my camera and recording videos and stuff. My only somewhat of a disappointment was that no one is in chat tonight like they were last year on my birthday, when I told everyone there about Xander being born . Thanks again everybody!! Ronnie Edit: It appears that we got a new chat and I didnt know it, so when I launched my little html file, I was all alone in the old chat room . Then I remembered reading something about new chat security or something and decided to try the chat thing on the site, and voila! theres all my buddies!

Ouchies! Hope it heals fast! Ronnie

Behold...the ultimate doggy Birthday cake, made up under the creative mind of your's truly . For those of you wondering, here's how I made it . First find a little kettle with a removable handle (use a screw driver ). This will be the cake pan. Spray with non-stick cooking spray thusly (why thats a cool word now isnt it? I've always wanted to use it too...). As for ingredients... Cake 3 cups of Iams Large Breed Dog Food, ground up fine with a decent meat grinder 3 large eggs 3 heaping tablespoons of whole wheat flour (doggies cant have that All Purpose crap so dont try it!) 8 ounces of butter or margarine (about half of a little tub), plus 1 tablespoon to be mixed in with the peanut butter as it melts 3/4 cup of peanut butter, melted down with 1 tablespoon of butter 1/2-3/4 cup of milk Frosting A lot of peanut butter Writing and Decor 2 tablespoons of peanut butter A little food coloring 2 doggy treats Combine dog food, eggs and softened butter. Melt peanut butter down in a separate kettle and add 1 tablespoon of butter to it. After it has a creamy consistancy, stir in whole wheat flour until mostly integrated. In a large bowl, combine dog food mixture and peanut butter mixture. Based on dryness of cake, add enough milk to result in an almost cake-batter consistancy. Spoon 1/3 of the mixture into the sprayed kettle and bake in a 350 degree oven for about 15 minutes, or until the cake gives a little with a fork and said fork comes out clean. Bake the remaining 2 layers as did the first one, cooling each one after coming out of the oven. Once all three layers are baked, put the 2nd-best layer down first to be the foundation. Frost the top of it with a decent layer of peanut butter. Place the cruddiest looking layer in the middle and frost that one the same way. Then place the best looking layer on top, frost the top, then frost the entirety of the side of the cake. Then to write on the cake, take a little thing off of your standard Bic pen that you can blow air through, slightly snip off a corner of a baggy and stick the pen tip in the baggy and voila! a homeade pastry bag! Then, add a few spoonfuls of peanut butter and about 10 drops of (I used blue) food coloring and mix it up by squishing the peanut butter around inside the baggy, being careful not to squirt any out the tip. When ready to write, chances are that the peanut butter at the very beginning didnt get integrated with the food dye, so just squirt out a little on a plate until you see a difference in color. Write your canine-buddy a birthday greeting, garnish with the treats, and you're done!! Yeah I've pretty much lost it but I love that dog!

Happy Birthday Eric!!

lol, wow....it's about time . Ronnie

Whoops, sorry guys. Try again now, and if it asks you for a password, it's xander.

Okay guys, courtesy of my new camera, here's a video clip of Xander being Xander . [url="http://s68.photobucket.com/albums/i29/ronf89/?action=view

It's happened a few times when I get up in the morning cuz I stood up to stretch, lol, but otherwise not really. As for head turning, I think tilting my head all the way back may be what triggers it but I'm not for certain. And with heart issues....Justin had heart trouble a while back if you remember , but I blamed Lorena on that because she puts so much stress on him and shit, and anyway, he's my age . I prolly should look into getting it evaluated, but dont worry Snowy, I always question the doctors before I let them do anything ... I got the doctor and dentist kinda irritated by asking about the numbing stuff, hehe, and surprisingly, the doctor actually knew what it did to my nerves like I asked her . I hadnt thought of herbal or natural treatment when Nate and Viv first told me to get to the doctor and have it tested, in fact sowwy Natey cuz I was like, "why? so he can prescribe me a drug that I wont take?", lol. Anyway, thanks for your concern guys . Ronnie

Happy Birhtday, Julia!!

Okay guys, so if you've read Viv's blog, you may be wondering what she meant by: Hehe, well something really weird happened to me the other night . I get this thing every so often where I'll have sat on the computer too long, and I'll stand up to stretch and then for some reason, my vision like goes black for a second or two and then goes back to normal and I'm fine. I've obviously thought to myself that it shouldn't be happening, cuz it's not normal, but I've always kinda shrugged it off because it only happens for a few seconds and it only happens after I stand up to stretch or get up real fast. But the other night, I had been sitting for a while and got up to stretch and I was looking at my TV and I felt the thing coming and again, didn't think anything of it. The next thing I know, I'm on the ground feeling as if someone was waking me up by beating me over the head . Here, I had fallen and hit my head on my bed frame and the bottom of my computer chair. Later I realize that I must have hit my desk on my way down as well because my wallet, my toothbrush, and a bunch of other things I had sitting on the side of my desk were on the floor. This was really freaky because I've never fainted before and nothing has ever resulted from my vision going all weird, not to mention me getting a big ole goose egg on the side of my head . Nate suggested that maybe there was something in the air vents that I was breathing in that could be causing this, but I doubt it because it's been happening for a few years and we haven't lived here for a year yet. Another interesting point is that my brother gets the vision thingys too, and like me, until the other day when I fell, he's never fallen either. Xander was naughty yesterday!! We had been on a really long walk, we had been gone like 2 hours, and we were almost home, like 2 blocks away from home. We see this old guy walking his dog up ahead and as usual, Xander pulled me towards the dog because he likes to mingle with other dogs and I've never had a problem with him being aggressive with other dogs or people. So he pulls me towards the dog and he sniffed the dogs face and within a blink of an eye, Xander like started a fight with the dog!! He's never done anything like that before and I have no idea why he did it! The dog was friendly and didnt do a thing to him! Xander does have a problem with rabbits and cats tho so unless the dog had just gotten in a fight with a cat or beat a rabbit in it's race for life, I dunno what came over him. The old guy just kinda pulled his dog back with a look like "oh, it happens" but my brother, as usual, being jealous of my normally-good dog, he tried saying that the guy looked all pissed and like wanted me to hit Xander! I did scold Xander (I know that he feels bad when I scold him and it gets to him if he's done something wrong and he'll try and love up to me to say he's sorry so I know it works because I have very little trouble with him) and because of what he did, I did 'tap' his nose a few times, not hit him tho, I don't believe in that unless the circumstances are different, like the day that Jayne was trying to tear Xander apart when she couldnt get at the stray collie . Also, the last few days, Jayne has been sick with like the diarhrea and threw up a few times, and now she's fine and she's given it to Xander . So today Xander threw up a few times so I hope it passes in a few days like it did with Jayne. Also, I kinda made my decision for Xander's middle name. I don't want it to be Zoe because my mom's been calling him that just to piss me off, and I don't want to give her the satisfaction of that being what I pick . Of the ones suggested by you guys, I like Alexander, Daniel, Nathaniel, and Matthew the most. There's a few others that sound good but they don't really fit with my last name, which is gonna end up making the decision of those 4, and that name is Matthew. Matthew also kinda gives it a ring that makes it seem as if he were a person had you not known he was a dog . So thanks for your help guys! Oooh! My camera got here today !!! It freaking rules!! I'm having so much fun messing around with it . And me having not used them in how many years, I forgot how much alkaline batteries suck!! lol, some alkalines came with my camera in the manufacturers box and I've taken a decent number of photos but that's nothing compared to the specs found on the internet for good rechargeables. I do want to like start a little photography business here in time but I want to become a pro at using this camera first, so I can work with any shooting conditions. I've done a little research on photography businesses for when I do start my own. I also hope to be the main-yearbook photographer this school year . If you guys remember from my past entry, I kinda have trouble with the yearbook lady thinking I'm irresponsible, but I'm gonna send her an email here in time and explain what happened this last year, and this year if I have a problem I'm gonna come to her and just speak my mind instead of being intimidated by her getting mad when I ask a question. And one last thing , this camera can also record pretty decent video, so here in time I'll have some video clips of Xander for you Xander fans . Ronnie

Happy... ...Monday Joey ...I don't want to make you mad again, so even though I want to post that image that I worked hard making, I wont and just am gonna say Happy Monday and hope ya have a great day! Ronnie

Happy Birthday MovieGuy!!

Happy Big 2-0 EleCivil!!

Happy Birthday Deb!! Ronnie

Okay, I never really gave Xander a real middle name...my mom calls him Xander Zoe...cuz it sounds cool when you say "Jayne Joe and Xander Zoe" but I dont really like that and it pisses me off each time she calls him Xander Zoe because I tell her not to and she does anyway and I havent confirmed that that's his middle name and yea. Anyways, I decided to let you guys come up with names that sound good following Xander, and then if one really sticks out to me that I like, I'm gonna pick it, or if there's more than one that I really like, I'll create a poll in the Lounge, but as of now, courtesy of Viv, I like Xander Matthew . Make me proud guys Ronnie

Happy15th Birthday Robbee!!! Hope ya have a great birthday and it's not too boring of a car trip . Ronnie