Modern High - 29. Chapter 25 -- Overcoming Differences

Modern High

Chapter 25

Overcoming Differences

After that night of bowling with our friends, Zach more or less turned into a person I wished I had never met. However, if you’d ask me if I still loved him, I surely do.

Here we are three months later, May and we still haven’t talked. The last time I can honestly remember talking to Zach was at school three days after the bowling party, we didn’t say much but maybe ‘Hi’. I remember a time when Zach and I couldn’t keep from talking to one another, but now it seems as though something has been put in the way of our communicating.

“Jacob?” my mom yells for me.

“I’m in the den.”

“Come here, please.” she says.

“Sure, hold on,” I tell her.

Walking into the kitchen, the first thing I see is a big colored box sitting on the floor. On top of the colored box was a tied bow; it looked so cute. I didn’t dare touch it. How could I? It would be like destroying art. Looking to my mom, she had a grand smile placed on her lips. You see, today is my birthday, one I have been counting the days for. Today I turn sixteen, just like all my friends. At least now I don’t have to worry about being too young to enjoy what they do.

“What’s the matter? Don’t you like it?” my mother asks me.

“Yea... Yea, I like it. What is it?” I ask her, after I place a smirk upon my lips.

“Well open it and find out,” she said in a happy voice.

Walking over to the box, I squat down. Taking in the purplish colored box, with a pink bow on top, my eyes glisten over. It looked so special, how can I destroy something like this? It must have taken her all night to finish. Looking to my mother again, I saw that she had concern, or was it wonderment in her eyes? But she looked upon me and saw that I was a little bit sad. Her smile faded and was replaced by care. She laid a hand on my shoulder and rubbed it.

“It will get better, Jacob. You’ll see,” she spoke.

Instead of answering her, I nodded my head. There wasn’t anything to say. I knew that she understood what I have been going through, the relationship that I want to have back. Swiping my misty eyes, I looked back upon the box, took a deep breath and ripped the purplish wrapping paper from it. There, sitting in front of me now, sat an Xbox 360 Elite.

Whipping my head to the side, I saw that my mother had the most absolute award winning smile playing on her lips, she looked really happy. I couldn’t tell her how much this present meant to me, so the only thing I could do was stand up and hug her, tight.

Sniffling back a sob, I hugged her again.

“Happy birthday, Jacob,” she whispered to me. I smiled on her shoulder.

“Now, get ready. You’re going to be late,” she stated while she cleaned up the wrapping paper.

“What no cake?” I asked in fake hurt, I even threw in my hand over my heart for good measure.

“Now, don’t do that to me,” she laughed as she opened the refrigerator door. There in the fridge sat a three-tier cake, all chocolate with what looked like hot pink ribbons wrapped around it.

Stepping closer, I saw what was on top. To my son, on his sixteenth birthday. Love Mom.

I kissed her on the cheek and ran out the room. I still wasn’t comfortable with her seeing me cry. ‘How can today get any sweeter?’ I asked myself as I ran to my room.

My mother surprised me by dropping me off at school. My friends stood there with a happy birthday sign, decorated with ribbons and sparkles that reflected the sun; it was spectacular. Turning back around, I kissed my mother one last time before joining my friends.

My friends sang happy birthday to me as I slowly walked up to them. I felt such a rush of embarrassment course through me, aspeople around us started to giggle and laugh, making my cheeks turn bright red.

When they finished singing, they handed me a large present and hugged me once. But they didn’t leave. I guess they wanted me to open the present. As time went on, we stood there waiting. The one person who I wished was here wasn’t. It saddened me to no end, but I guess he didn’t want to be associated with the singing, or with my sixteenth birthday.

“Jacob, what’s the matter?” Nichole asked me, as she wrapped one of her arms around my waist.

“Nothing, it’s just...” I tried to say, but my vision clouded over as the person I wanted here walked by.

“Zach?” Nathan said in a, what-the-fuck voice.

“What?” Zach replied.

“Aren’t you going to say something to Jacob?” Nathan asked.

“What the fuck for?” he said.

Nathan raised his voice to Zach.“Because, asshole, he’s your ex. The one you still love, or is that not a problem anymore?”

“Listen here, Nathan, if he,” he pointed towards me as he kept his eyes on Nathan, “wants to talk to me, he knows how. Now do me a favor and leave me alone!” he yelled, as he turned and swiftly walked away.

“What the fuck was that all about?” Nichole questioned.

“Nothing. Zach needs to get over himself.”

“Nathan, Zach has been through a lot. Give him a break,” Nichole said, as she kissed Nathan on the cheek and walked away with Candice and Ashley.

“I’m sorry Jacob, I’ll talk to Zach,” Nathan stated.

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it, I know what I have to do,” I told him, and I walked away.

Walking into school, I felt something, something that I haven’t felt in a long time. Peace, at least I thought it was peace. But then I came to find out it was anxiety. I forgot this whole week is exams and tests. Fuck, I haven’t studied at all. How can I possibly pass any of them?

“You ready, Jacob?” one of my friends, Chris, asked me, as he clapped me on the shoulder.

“Hah, easy for you to say. You’re a geek,” I laughed.

“Yea, whatever. C’mon we’ll be late,” he said, as we both ran down the hall.

Running behind Chris, was awesome. The way his ass flexed in those basketball shorts and the way his calf muscles hardened as he ran. Mmm, I wonder what is underneath them. Heh, thinking naughty, almost made me get a boner running, hah.

Getting to the classroom as the late bell rang, we separated and went to our own desks. Mine so happened to be next to Zach’s; he didn’t look at me, or ever acknowledge me. I shrugged as the teacher passed down the stack of papers.

During the test, my mind was on other matters, like Zach and me. How are we ever going to get back to talking if Zach never wants to talk to me? How are we supposed to get past this dilemma if we’re both avoiding each other?

When I finished the test, I exited the class. With a great sigh of relief, I slouched down and put my back against the wall. After that test, I didn’t know how I was going to get through the remaining three.

During lunch, I decided to eat outside. The warmth of the sun did wonders as I sat on the bleachers at the football field. Some kids were running laps, and some even waved to me as they passed. I didn’t mind so much, it left me time to wonder, wonder about everything that has happened to me so far this year. When opening my eyes again, I saw shadows. Shadows of four figures standing in front of me, this reminded me of my last experiences. This can only get worse.

“Do you mind if we sit with you, Jacob?” Oh, thank god. It wasn’t anyone who wanted to kill me for what happened to Toby. Nathan and the gang stood there waiting for me to answer them. With a single nod of my head, they sat. Nathan sat on the left of me, and Nichole sat on the right. Ashley and Candice sat behind us.

We talked all through lunch, about many things actually. I guess I miss having friends, real friends I should say. I came up with a plan to get Zach talking to me because I really wanted to hear his soft luscious voice again. Especially after having sex, that’s when it’s really cute and adorable.

Therefore, that was the plan; couple’s counseling.

After the lunch, came physics. I don’t know how I did, but hopefully I passed. The next exam I had was gym. For a normal high school, they wouldn’t give you an exam for gym, but I guess this school is way different from the others I have attended. At least Toby isn’t here anymore, that’s awesome.

The day passed without a fight or a word spent between Zach and me. I guess Zach doesn’t want to talk after all. I wondered why he was in such a sour mood this morning. What have I done that was SO bad that he had to get temperamental with me? Thinking about the past brought up some bad emotions. The smile that I had this morning and all through today was instead replaced by a frown. I really do miss Zach holding me... and the times that we would kiss. Remembering all that brought a smirk to my face, but it quickly vanished. As I came to my porch, I saw there was a present addressed to me. Who else would know that today is my birthday?

Reaching for it, I found the name of the person: Zach. How could he? Why did he? I asked myself as I slowly tore open the box. Inside the box rested two things. The first was a poem and the second was a bottle of lube. I cracked up. I laughed so hard that I doubled over. My ribs would never feel the same again.

Slowly, I slid my finger over the parchment paper. The smell of it reminded me of Zach, his cologne. I miss that smell. Mmm, and the taste of it too. Oh god, I’m getting hard just smelling it. That’s bad... or is it?

Sad

S. ad for you is how I feel now

A. bsolutely painful to be near you

D. ead is how I feel for you now.

Zachary Martin

After a while of sitting in the kitchen, I decided to get ready for the appointment that I had Nathan and Nichole setup. I really do need to figure out why Zach hates me so much. And why he thinks of me as dead now. Yes, the poem he wrote, it didn’t make sense. Why would it though? Doesn’t he still love me?

“You ready, Jacob?” Nichole asked me.

“Yea, sure,” I replied, as we walked out the door.

“Why so glum, Jacob? You were the one that suggested this,” she said.

“I know, but that’s not why I’m... I’m... I don’t know, ‘glum’,” I told her.

“Then why?”

“Because, Zach wrote me a poem and it’s tearing me up inside.”

“What? When did he do that? What did it say?” she asked me rushed.

“Something about sad for how he feels about me now, absolutely painful to be near me, and I can’t forget the last line of the poem. Dead is how I feel for you now, or something like that.”

“Oh, that’s terrible. Why would he write such a thing?”

“I don’t know, Nichole. It’s not like him.”

“That’s true, it isn’t.”

“Let’s just get this over with.”

“Alright, that is, if you still want to go through with it.”

“I have to,” I said as I looked at her in the eyes. “I have to know why he hates me so.”

“I don’t think he hates you,” she says as she sighs, “I think because of what you did, he hates the consequences of it.”

“Do you...” I had to stop talking because we ran into Nathan and Zach. The look on his face was one of apprehension. When Zach finally realized that I was standing there before him, he wanted to run. However, Nathan was too fast for him and caught him before he could complete turning around.

“Zach? Listen, you guy’s have to talk. There’s no getting around it. You both are miserable,” Nichole tried to say.

“It’s not me that has to do any of the ‘talking’, Nichole. It’s Jacob, he’s done this. How do you expect me to even be in the same room as him?” Zach retorted.

“Just talk, god damn it. You guys act like this was planned out or some shit. Just fucking talk, for Christ’s sake,” Nichole said as she raised her voice to him.

“No,” Zach said.

“You really are a moron if you’re willingly going to throw away a relationship,” Nichole spat.

“Whatever,” Zach said indifferently.

“Fine!” Nichole and Nathan both stated simultaneously.

So here we are, standing at crossroads, trying to figure out who is going to budge first. We all looked from one to the other. Nathan said, “Look Zach, just do it. If nothing comes out of it then, fine. At least then you’ll know. Just please, do this for me,” he pleaded with the stubborn Zach.

Zach uncrosses his arms, and takes a stance. However, his facial expression showed that he was contemplating what Nathan just asked him to do. When he finally decided, he said, “Fine, if that’s what you want, then I’ll do it.”

“Thank you,” Nathan responded.

“You’re not welcome,” Zach stated, turning towards the door and leaving the rest of us behind.

Sighing and looking at Nathan and Nichole, I say, “Let’s just get this over with, shall we?” As I looked in the direction that Zach went.

“Might as well,” Nichole said.

When we first came into the counselor’s office, it was immaculate, meaning everything had its place. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, she even had little ferns in a pot, hanging by a macramé cord from the ceiling. The one thing that I actually did like about her office was the aquarium that had neon tetra. They looked so awesome swimming around. It made me wonder, what if I was like them? Would that be awesome?

Once the door opened to the actual counseling room, there stood a fine looking women wearing a business suit. She had a high-collar white cotton button-up blouse, along with an open navy blue jacket, and a navy blue length skirt that came down to just above her knees. Her face showed that she was concerned; about what, I don’t know. What I do know is she had a manila folder in her hand, and was running her other hand down the papers that I assume were in it. When the woman finally looked up, you could tell that she took pride in what she wore on her face, and in what clothes she wore. Her overall appearance is one of a conservative professional.

“Mr. Alexander… And Mr. Martin,” She said, her voice sounded light.

We stand up, but don’t look at each other. This session is going to be very difficult to do with him. I can tell that he has a lot of built up anger over our relationship.

“Please, come in.” She smiles, showing her teeth, which, I should tell you, are perfect and straight.

Walking into the counselor’s counseling room, the first thing that I saw was a dark mahogany desk, with several glass figurines upon it.

“Please, take a seat. I’ll be back in just a couple of minutes. Please, talk amongst yourselves.”

When she left the room, it filled with silence. And not the comfortable silence either. Even if I did want to talk to him, what should I say, or how shall I act? A lot of confusing things were going through my head as the door reopened, and the lady walked swiftly back in.

“Now where were we?” she asked with a smile.

“Um, you were going to counsel us, Miss.”

“Ms. Vanderwoods,” she replied.

“Right, Ms. Vanderwoods.”

“Anyway, what brings you two young men to my office?”

“Relationship problems, Ms.” Zach said in a nonchalant voice.

“Mr. Martin,is that correct?”

“Correct.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because, for the past, I don’t know… eight months, Jacob and I haven’t talked. Or when we did it would turn ugly. Oh, and we can’t forget the cheating Jacob decided to do.”

“Why don’t we work on getting to the problem and leaving the rest out for…”

“Zach you know that I didn’t cheat on you purposely, it just happened.”

“Right, and Tom just happened to be in your pants. Right!” Zach stated angrily

“Now boys…”

“No, let him finish. He hasn’t talked to me about this yet and I want to know why. Why Zach? Why couldn’t you have said something, huh? WHY?” I screeched out.

“Boys!” Ms. Vanderwoods screamed over us.

When we stopped yelling, the room again fell quiet. Me, I was shocked that she would actually yell. She looked so calm and collected.

“Now then, from now on, no one talks unless I tell them. Got it?”

Instead of answering we nodded our heads in acknowledgement.

“Zach, you were talking, continue.”

“It all started when we went on vacation for my birthday. Ha! I shouldn’t even call it that. Shit! It was ruined even before we got there.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because, Ms. Vanderwoods, Jacob cheated on me, I got propositioned by the same guy. My so called friends tried to hook me up with him. And then this cute guy, Scott, he wanted in on the action. For the four days we were there, it just went to shit. I can’t look at them, or him, without remembering what went on then. Plus other things, but those are not important. Or shall I tell her Jacob?”

“Tell me what, Mr. Martin?”

“That, Ja…”

“Don’t you even fucking dare, Zachary. You know that was a lie and still is.”

“Yea, then why did I find you shirtless in his house, huh? Answer that.”

That was a lowblow even for him. I didn’t say anything, I couldn’t. It was true. However, we didn’t fuck.

“Mr. Alexander, care to answer that question?” she asked.

“What Zach is referring to, is that he caught me, yes. But he lacks the information.”

“Do you care to explain?”

“Sure, why not. Zach seems not to care anymore.”

“It all started when Zach and Toby had something, and then that something turned ugly. He tried to warn me about him, and yes, before you even think about saying anything, he did tell me what happened to him. However, I told Zach that I would be the judge of my own friends. Needless to say, Zach was right. Toby was, and still is, a low life scum. Anyway, to answer your question, Ms. Vanderwoods, Zach did see me without a shirt on at Toby’s house, but the information that Zach doesn’t seem to know is that after he left, I left. I didn’t have the strength to say no to Toby until Zach showed up. I still love him, no matter if he doesn’t love me.”

“You still…”

“Yes, Zach. I still do.”

“It looks like the only thing you two needed was to talk, and listen. However, you two young men have a lot of things to discuss. Do you want to continue in here or in the privacy of your own home?”

“I think I would like it if Jacob and I talked here. This is a safe place. No friends or family listening in. Peaceful, actually.”

“Good, I will leave you two alone. You boy’s have thirty five minutes remaining on your session. I will come tell you when it is up.”

“Thank you,” Zach and I said together.

“Good.”