Kiss me to Springtime - 7. Chapter 7

“Why do I bother?” Ryo cursed under his breath walking into the bathroom to flush the stupid pills.

He’d hoped Soubi changed these past few weeks. Why the hell did it matter so much to get Soubi clean?

Ryo kicked the bathroom door open and slapped the light on. He stared at the sealed brown bag, preoccupied by the staples on the envelope.

“Calm down and go back to Soubi.” Kaito came to stand beside him. “You’re going to push him to the edge.”

“This envelope proves I can’t trust him. How could he do this? Why is ecstasy more important? I found him talking to that woman. He looked upset when he got in the car. I thought they were discussing work issues. I can’t believe it was about drugs.”

“The bag is sealed, Ryo.” Kaito pointed at the staples. “If he’d bought them, it wouldn’t be sealed.”

“He could have another stash.” Ryo cursed. “We need to check his room.”

Kaito punched his arm.

“You can’t be the one to doubt Soubi. He needs you, Ryo. You can’t quit on him.”

“I’m not quitting. I’m disappointed, Kai.” Ryo shook the envelope at Kaito. “This crap will kill him and I can’t watch that happen.”

Kaito stepped back.

“Soubi has changed. This has to be a misunderstanding.”

Ryo tore the bag open and dumped the pills into the toilet bowl. He flushed them away and threw the bag into the trash. A door slammed and he glanced at Kaito. He rushed out of the bathroom and raced for Soubi’s room. It was empty.

Soubi was gone.

Kaito hurried to the stairs and raced down to the first floor. Ryo followed him hoping they would catch up to Soubi before he got too far. They ran out of the house, and out the gate to the dark street.

“Where the hell is he going at night?” Ryo asked. There was no one on the main street. Soubi must have run. “We should split up. He can’t have gone that far.”

“I think he’ll head to the train station. Come on, if we hurry we’ll catch him before he boards.”

Ryo sighed. “Let’s take the car, it will be faster. We can wait for him at the station.”

****

Soubi zipped his jackets, and put his hands into the pockets. The cold cleared his head as he walked fast toward the train station. He’d stay at Grandma’s until he could get another apartment. He had been stupid to let Ryo talk him into letting the other one go. He should be used to feeling abandoned. He didn’t need their house, but he needed to prove to Ryo that he wasn’t on drugs.

His choice not to take them was hard, so hard, Soubi sighed. Ryo had no idea what it took not to take the pills from Tohru earlier. That bitch was going to pay for this.

Soubi walked briskly, the buzz from the sake disappearing thanks to the cold air. He reached the station twenty minutes later. He started up the stairs and almost jumped out of his skin when a hand clamped on his right-upper arm. He started to scream and turned to find Ryo standing on a lower step.

“Where are you going?” Ryo demanded. “Do you really need a fix this bad?”

“Fuck off.” Soubi tried to shrug off Ryo’s hold on his arm, but the bastard held him fast. “I don’t need your judgmental speeches.”

“Judgmental,” Ryo said with a mocking laugh. “Don’t hurt yourself with the vocabulary, Soubi. You might break something.”

“Let me go.” He tried to shrug off Ryo’s hold again and failed. “I’m heading to Grandma’s. I’ll stay there until I can find a place of my own. I don’t need your charity.”

“What are you talking about?” Ryo frowned, his face handsome in the street light.

Soubi’s heart still had time to pound insanely at the thought of being this close to Ryo. He wanted to hold Ryo, and be with him. He pulled on his upper arm before he started begging.

“I’m leaving.” He looked away from Ryo. “I don’t need to stay in a place where I’m not wanted, or trusted.”

“Soubi,” Ryo gasped. “What—

“Let go of my arm,” Soubi demanded. “You’re hurting me.”

The tight hold slackened but Ryo didn’t let go.

“The moment I drop my hand, you’re going to run into the station. I can’t let that happen.”

Soubi shook his head.

“Why is it always what you want? You jump to conclusions, and refuse to listen to anything I say. You should let me get on that train. It will be better for all of us.”

“No.” Ryo’s tone low, apologetic. “I’m sorry—

“That’s not what I want from you.” He glared at Ryo. “Do you still think I’m on drugs?”

Ryo’s gaze dropped and pain stabbed his heart. He deserved this distrust, but to get it from Ryo.

Soubi swallowed back the lump in his throat.

“Let me go, Ryo.”

“I can’t.” Ryo shook his head. “I won’t. Please, Soubi, come back home.”

“You don’t trust me.” He met dark eyes. “I don’t blame you. I don’t trust myself, but I have no idea why it’s so important that you believe me. I didn’t buy those pills. Tohru put them in my pocket because I refused them and—

“Fine, I believe you.” Ryo cut him off.

“Don’t say that because it’s what you think I want to hear.”

“What do you want from me?”

“I need you to trust me!”

A fresh crowd of people emerged from the train station. Some glanced at them curious, he pulled on his arm again, but Ryo’s grip didn’t falter.

“Hey guys,” Kaito said, rushing up the steps to stand beside Soubi. “It’s getting cold out here.”

Ryo’s arm dropped away and Soubi glanced at the train station doors. He contemplated going to his grandmother’s house. He didn’t have the key, so he would need to wake her. Kaito wrapped an arm around his shoulder and pulled him into a warm hug.

“Let’s go home, Soubi. I’ll make you coffee,” Kaito promised into his ear, and then led him down the steps. “It’s freezing. This winter is going to be very cold.”

Soubi looked back.

Ryo stood staring at the ground, his hands in a fist.

***

Five days passed.

On a sunny afternoon, Kaito came in to the lounge holding a letter from the clinic. Kaito waved the paper at Ryo.

“The test was negative. He’s been clean for a while.”

Ryo watched Kaito walk to the worktable and place the test results at his elbow.

“You have an apology to make,” Kaito said.

Ryo stared at the test results.

Soubi wasn’t talking to him. He made breakfast, washed dishes and left the house in the morning without a word. He returned late at night, too exhausted to do anything but sleep.

Ryo missed hearing Soubi’s infectious laugh. Hell, he even missed the tirades Soubi went into when they forgot to pick up towels in the bathroom. He missed Soubi’s food. Five days of silent treatment and Ryo was ready to lose his mind. He picked up the test results and studied the black and white proof that Soubi was clean.

“Where is he today?” Ryo asked his best friend.

Kaito pulled out a cigarette from his shirt pocket.

“He’s jammed up his days with photo shoots. Yesterday, he stumbled in at ten o’clock at night. I’m not sure about today, he doesn’t say much.”

Ryo dropped the paper on the table and stood.

“I’ll wait for him today.”

“Are you going to fight with him?” Kaito narrowed his gaze. “You’re both idiots. Soubi working himself rugged, you, practically living in this shop. Stop being a coward and face him. Those test results showed up two days ago. You should have talked to him the moment they arrived.”

“I have no idea how to apologize. He won’t give me an opening.”

Ryo paced around the worktable scratching his jaw.

“Take him out, sit down, have a talk.” Kaito shrugged. “You’re really good at that kind of thing.”

Ryo picked his keys from the worktable.

“Can you give us the house tonight?”

Kaito grinned.

“As long as when I get back tomorrow Soubi is back to normal. I miss his cooking.”

“You got a deal.”

“Great, then I can entertain myself tonight,” Kaito said, lighting his cigarette.

Ryo got his jacket and left the shop determined to find a way to apologize to Soubi.

****

“He’s worried for you. I think that’s important.” Sasha Takeno pulled at the sleeves on the jacket Soubi wore. “You look delicious. I love dressing you, Soubi-chan.”

Soubi chuckled.

“Do you ever stop flirting, Sasha?”

Sasha hugged him.

“If you’d accept to be mine, I’d not need to flirt. But, you won’t. Instead, you’re torturing me with stories of your latest beau.”

“He’s not my beau. Are you even listening?” Soubi made an exasperated sound. “Ryo has such high standards. I’m always going to fall short.”

Sasha tagged Soubi’s ponytail gently then walked to a comfortable couch. Soubi watched Sasha sit and cross one leg over another. The man looked elegant and regal, as he deserved.

Sasha Takeno was head designer and owner of Sasha, Inc.

Soubi admired Sasha’s talented and self-assured temperament. Despite all the fame and money, Sasha treated everyone with respect and warmth. They’d known each other for three years now, and Soubi loved being Sasha’s friend.

“Well,” Soubi demanded when Sasha kept staring at him.

“You are beautiful to look at. That jacket’s not working though. I need to adjust the cut. It’s too—,”

Sasha waved his right hand in the air, searching for a word.

Soubi turned to look into the mirror a few feet away.

“I’m not the formal attire types. It looks too stuck up.”

“Take it off. I’ll start again from scratch.” Sasha laid his head back on the couch. “As for your man problems, give Ryo a break.”

Soubi pulled off the jacket and placed it on the mannequin Sasha used.

“I already forgave him for jumping to conclusions.”

“I’ll have a talk with Tohru. She needs to apologize for making trouble for you,” Sasha said.

Soubi sighed and sat in an armchair across Sasha. “I think I’ll quit modeling.”

“And do what?” Sasha gaped, sitting up straight. “You not modeling is unthinkable, Soubi. I’d rather you stop dating him.”

Soubi laughed rubbing his forehead.

“I need him. I need him more than I need this job.”

“It’s not a job.” Sasha narrowed light brown eyes at him. “You love modeling. I’ve seen you on the runway.”

Soubi stared at the carpet. He’d thought about quitting more times than he dared say. He just didn’t know what else he could do for a living.

Sasha got off the couch and came to kneel before him. Elegant hands took his in a warm gentle clasp.

“Soubi Tanaka, you love modeling, and no one should force you to stop doing what you love.”

“Even though I love him,” Soubi asked, his throat tight with an unexpected lump. “I think about Ryo ninety-five percent of the time. The other five percent, I’m worrying about thinking about him. Does that even make sense?”

Sasha smiled.

“You love him.”

Soubi shook his head.

“I keep thinking one of these days he’s going to realize I don’t belong in his world.”

Sasha frowned.

“He’s the only Asada who’s ever left the family estate. His mother is still staying there even though everyone knows Ryo’s dad married another woman. Ryo is a man who sets his own world. You fit in to his world just fine.”

“You’re going to poke holes into all my excuses, aren’t you?”

“That’s what I’m here for.” Sasha leaned to kiss Soubi’s forehead. “Go home, make up, have crazy first time sex, come back and tell me about it. I live through you.”

Soubi chuckled blinking back tears.

“That’s because you won’t take a chance, Sasha. Not everyone is after your money.” Soubi touched the tip of Sasha’s nose with a finger. “I’m sure you’ll find some guy out there who wants you.”

“Well, maybe I should steal you away from Ryo,” Sasha joked, though his gaze told Soubi a different story. “We could live happily.”

Soubi wondered why he couldn’t fall for this handsome creature. His life would be so easy.

“If he gets hard-headed,” Soubi said with a small smile. “I might take you up on the offer.”

Sasha stood, pulling him up.

“Ryo’s a lucky guy. Now, get going. Stop running away from home.”

Soubi got his leather jacket from the coat hanger. He hadn’t needed to carry his duffel bag today.

“Soubi,” Sasha called when he was at the door.

He turned to look at his friend.

“Don’t quit modeling unless you’re tired of it, don’t do it for someone else.”

Soubi nodded and left Sasha’s office with a short wave. He daydreamed his way home, his feet guiding him through the busy Ginza streets to the train. The train ride was a blur, his thoughts preoccupied by the cold war raging at home. It was getting hard not to talk to Ryo. He’d never realized just how exhausting staying angry could be.

Soubi got off at Shimokita and stuck his hands in his pockets. He figured slowing his pace would get him home at around six o’clock.

He wondered if Ryo was home. He wished they hadn’t fought about the pills. The silent treatment plan had started by mistake. He had tried to apologize to Ryo the next day after the test, but Ryo hadn’t shown up that night. Soubi lost his courage. He couldn’t stop thinking about their date and the painting hanging at the gallery named for him.

Soubi stopped on the path.

He wanted to forget Ryo’s expression later that evening. Dark eyes swirling with anger, and betrayal, his heart clenched in defeat. Ryo’s lack of trust hurt so much. Granted, he was at fault too, but he’d made a promise to Ryo.

Soubi continued home.

At some point in the past few weeks, Ryo’s house had become home to him. He loved his room with its low queen size bed and the strange view of a haphazard small flower garden. Ryo had hauled in the huge comfortable armchair he used when he was playing video games.

He loved that Kaito and Ryo allowed him reign over the kitchen. If he asked for something, it showed up the next day. He missed cooking for them, and eating meals together at the kitchen table. He even missed hustling them about the laundry on the floor in their rooms.

Maybe he should just cook tonight.

Soubi paused at the gate and stared at the house. The guys rooms were probably a mess right now, and he’d end up doing all the cleaning—,

Soubi sighed.

Opening the gate, he walked up the short path to the house. Ryo had given him a key attached to a wooden block with his name carved on the surface.

Soubi wondered how he was going to end the cold war. It was too exhausting. Turning the key on the door, he walked into the house with heavy steps. He removed his shoes and called out forlornly.

“I’m home.”

Ryo appeared at the kitchen door down the hall.

Soubi stopped unable to tear his eyes away from Ryo. Ryo was so handsome in a pair of black slacks and a white t-shirt that had a splashed of color on the front. Dark eyes smiled at him and his heart danced with joy.

Soubi wished for a miracle, since his brain was unable to forget their disagreements.

He started to turn away but Ryo reached him fast. Soubi almost sighed in contentment when Ryo grabbed his shoulders. His body rejoiced at the simple touch.

“Talk to me, Soubi,” Ryo said.

Soubi tilted his head to look at Ryo a gasp escaping when Ryo’s lips covered his. He closed his eyes in bliss. Gentle lips moving over his: teasing, a soft kiss, a cajoling kiss, Ryo broke away.

“Talk to me,” Ryo said again.

Soubi was too shocked to say anything.

Ryo leaned in to kiss him again. This time the kiss was insistent, Ryo demanded his participation. Soubi kissed back because he couldn’t resist. His fingers bunching Ryo’s shirt, his heart hammered in his chest.

Ryo broke the kiss and murmured, “Please, Soubi, talk to me.”

“Ryo,” he managed overwhelmed by Ryo’s determination.

Soubi looked up only to be kissed again. The cold war melted away, became a past to forget. He could barely breathe when Ryo pulled him against his body, kissing him deeply, holding him close. He clung when Ryo broke the kiss again.

“Ryo, what’s going on?”

“I made dinner.” Ryo announced triumphant. “I miss you, we’re going to sit down, and fix this shit. I can’t stand the silence anymore, Soubi. No more running away.”

“I was right here,” Soubi replied, his jaw set.

Kisses, however intoxicating, were not going to be enough to appease the situation. He blinked when Ryo pressed a kiss on his forehead.

“I can see the wheels turning in your head. I agree, we need to make some ground rules so that we don’t have another misunderstanding. For now, come in and let’s eat, then I have a gift for you.”

Ryo helped Soubi remove his leather jacket before he led him toward the kitchen.

****