Max and Josh - 2. Fears

Disclaimer: This story includes sexual and romantic situations between consenting individuals. Any allusion to illicit or illegal activity, sexual or otherwise, is used only for enhancement of the story line and not promotion thereof. Remember AIDS, HIV and other STDs are a very real threat, please always practice safe sex.

I can prove copyright on this story so please don't copy or remove this story for personal use without my permission.
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Max and Josh 02: Fears

Max walked into his room and tossed his back pack down by his desk then collapsed face first onto his bed. The first day back at school had been going fine till after lunch when Josh and him started for Gym.

Josh had stopped to use the bathroom while Max went straight to class. Like Josh had said at lunch, all Coach did for most of the class period was give the guys the whole sex ed. talk while Mrs. Reeves did the same with the girls, then had everyone run laps around the gym 'till class was over.

Except Max, Coach Mc'Cayhe had pulled him aside after the talk to hassle him about joining the football team, again. After Max had told him no for the third time he asked about his position on the weight lifting team and like Max had thought he told him he would have to try out for it this year. When Max asked why the Coach told him that the whole team from last year had to try out. Max knew that was a lie.

He had heard some of the guys from last year’s team in the locker room saying that the coach had called them the night before to tell them they still had their spot on the team and not to worry about trying out again.

Max was really pissed off over that, he knew the only reason the coach was making him try out for the team was because he refused to play football. It wasn't that Max wasn't good at football or that he didn't like it, he had played in Chicago before he moved. The reason Max wouldn't play was because of what happened in Chicago with his dad. After that, he never picked up a football again.

"I don't know if I would try out again, if he was that much of a dick to you about it he might try to make it difficult on you." Josh had told him as he changed in the locker room after the rest of the class had left. Max kept his head pointed at the floor while Josh changed, he was kind of glad the coach had Josh run twenty extra laps since he showed up late for class. It gave Max time to change before Josh, that way he wouldn't notice the major hard-on he got from seeing Josh half naked. Though since Josh had kept his back to him most of the time while he changed he had a perfect view of Josh's ass outlined in a pair of tight boxer-briefs. It was all he could do not to walk up behind him and give one of his cheeks a nice hard squeeze.

He knew Josh was right though it would probably be best not to try the coach.

If it wasn't for the fact that he loved being on the team he would have just let it go, but he enjoyed the physical challenge too much to give it up, and being able to see some of the hottest guys in the school wasn't a bad perk either.

History class had been little better. Max took Josh's advice, went in, sat down, took out his history book, and waited for class to start. The second Fleet looked at him though he knew he was in for something.

Fleet started in on three things, the earring in his left ear, the chain with the gold dragon charm around his neck, and the round Norse new beginnings rune he wore close to his throat. He told him to take out the earring and tuck in his necklaces or get out of his class.

Max, not wanting to get any more attention, did as he was told. Just as he finished tucking in the rune he heard a familiar voice from the back of the room speak up.

"If Max has to tuck in his necklaces shouldn't you have to tuck in that crucifix you have on?”

Max turned to make sure it was who he thought it was. He was right, it was Fay. He hadn't noticed her when he came in. She was sitting in the very back row with her friends Mary Cartwright, and Jenna Smith, both of whom knew he was a Wiccan, gay and probably didn't know to keep quiet in this class.

"The reason Miss. Davis is that my cross is a religious symbol; it has meaning, unlike young Mr. Calvin’s decorations." Fleet responded with a slight sneer.

"Well sir my decorations, as you put it, have just as much meaning to me as your cross does to you." Max blurted out before he could stop himself.

"Oh really, please explain Mr. Calvin what meaning do they have for you?" Fleet said with the same sneer as before.

"Well Sir, I wear the dragon as a symbol of my Chinese birth sign and I wear the rune because it means "new beginnings" which I think is pretty self explanatory, don't you?" Max said with a slightly cocky smile which was about to be wiped off his face.

"No as a matter of fact I don't think it is Mr. Calvin. I believe you came here from Chicago, did you not?” Max nodded, “Then why don't you tell us what could have happened that was so bad you needed a "new beginning”.” Fleet said still sneering.

"My mother was offered a better position at the hospital here, simple as that." Max lied with a shrug staring Fleet straight in the eye.

"Hmm really, I could have sworn your records said something about your being a homosexual had caused problems at your old school." Fleet had said with a smile.

"I think you have my records mixed up with someone else’s Mr. Fleet, I'm not gay." Max told him in a smooth voice even though he had gone very pale.

"Well, perhaps you are right. After all there could be two Max Alexander Calvin’s at this school. At any rate this is a history class, not a social gathering, so if there are no more interruptions would you all open your books to page five and read the first chapter."

Needless to say history was not going to be Max's favorite subject this year. But that was the least of his worries; with Fleet announcing to the class that Max was gay, well, if there weren't rumors before there would be now and it would impossible to keep Frank and Josh from hearing them.
What had been said in Fleet's class would be all over the school in a matter of days and Max would either have to find a way to discourage the rumors that were sure to come or fess up to them, neither of which did he find an appealing task.

BRRRRRIG......BRRRRRING....BRRRRRING......

The phone ringing yanked Max out of his thoughts.

"Probably just someone calling to confirm what was said in Fleets class today." He said aloud as he got up to get the phone off his desk.

"Hello Calvin residence." he said not bothering to look at the id.

"Hello, Max is that you? I am so, so, so, SO sorry, I should have just kept quiet. I heard rumors about that....that demon of a teacher all day. I am so, so sorry, please forgive me!" it was Fay on the other end and she sounded hysterical, on the verge of crying even.

"Fay babe calm down I'll be OK, it’s alright just calm down." Max said trying to calm her down but it was easier said than done.

"Oh, Max it is entirely my fault. I am sorry, now the whole school is going to find out and it is all my fault...." Fay had cracked, she was crying so hard he was surprised tears weren't leaking through the phone.

"Fay calm down the rumors aren't flying about me yet. There may not even be any." He said still trying to calm her down, not that be believed what he was saying.

"Oh you don't believe that anymore then I do and you know it." She was still crying but not as hysterically as before. And it was true, Max had only said that to calm her down; he actually believed that he would have to fess up to them within two weeks.

"And it is not all your fault,” he went on acting like he hadn't heard her, “You just opened the door. I was the one who stepped through and had it slammed in my face. I should've had more sense than to rise to that idiot's bait; he played me, and it was easy for him." Max said with a frown. Fleet must have read Max's records and figured he could make him into the perfect example for others to see he was not a teacher to cross unless you wanted to get fucked up…hard.

"But what if Josh and Frank find out. What will you do, lie to them? What if they try to hurt you?" Fay asked sounding like she might cry again.

"Well if they find out, they find out. There's nothing either one of us can do to stop it from happening if they ask me I won't lie. I should have told them before now; we have been friends for almost three years. What’s the worse they can do?" Max said slightly exasperated.

“Chicago.” she said sounding scared.

"Look Fay, if they stop talking to me then it's my fault anyway for not telling them sooner, and as for them hurting me, there is no way that will happen. I am a lot more alert now than I was then and plus even if they get that mad at me they wouldn't try anything like that, they aren't that stupid." He said trying to reassure her.

"So . . . So what are you going to do now?" she asked once more sounding like she was calming down.

"I do nothing yet. There really isn't anything I can do but wait, watch, listen and bide my time." He told her with a shrug, even though he knew she couldn’t see him.

"Oh Max I am so sorry. If there is anything I can do to help you just call, I'm here for you, got it?" she said finally sounding normal.

"I got it Fay, and don't be sorry, we both messed up today so we share the blame equally, and who knows it might turn out for the best." Max said with a smile. How it could turn out for the best was beyond his grasp but it may.

"OK, deal. We share it equally, but I am still sorry, you know that right?” she said timidly.

"Yea babe, I know you are. I still love you though. Now I got to go, will you be OK?" Max asked with a small laugh.

"Yea, I'll be fine. I’ll talk to you later Max. Bye, bye." She said before she hung up.

Max hung up the phone and sat down at his desk. He brought up his journal on the computer and started typing all about the day’s events and his growing feelings for Josh. He had typed faithfully in it since the day he had moved there. It contained all his secrets, hopes, and everything that happened in Chicago. That alone had taken up quite a lot of memory space. He hardly ever read it, he just typed it 'cause he didn't have anyone to talk to about it; he just wanted to put it all behind him once he was done writing. He finished his typing and reached for his pack and pulled out his tea that he had left over from lunch and started to take a drink when his mind suddenly went to Josh and how he had grabbed his hand at the lunch table.

He had never done anything like that before. Sure they had given each other high fives and friendly shit like that but nothing like what had happened today. Josh seemed to be as surprised as he had been and that was weird for Josh. He was always careful about what he did when other people were around, he didn't like to draw attention to himself and grabbing another guy’s hand on top of the lunch table in plan sight was sure to get him some attention.

"Just a mess up," he told himself. Josh had never really seen him that scared before so he just did it to calm him down. “That was it, nothing else, just one friend trying to calm down another friend. Or was it . . .”

"NO!” Max suddenly said to himself getting up to look in the mirror on the closet door. “No, that's all it was, he was just trying to help; Josh is straight and has no interest in you. He asked about Fay for goddess sakes. Just give it up, you will never get to be together, you're not even supposed to be having these feelings about friends anymore, not after what you have been through, you made a promise to yourself." Max yelled at his reflection. He turned and went back to his bed and started bawling, he knew better then to try and stop himself. He knew from a lot of personal experience that if he tried to hold it in he would just end up breaking down later. So he just sat there and cried, wishing he could...stop.

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Josh sat in his room thinking about how bad the first day of school had gone. Not really school itself but how many slip ups he had made with Max today, grabbing his hand at lunch and blowing up at him in the hallway. If he kept up like this he was sure Max would figure out that there was something up with him. What if he did, how would he react if Josh just told him," Hey, I'm gay and can't get you off my mind,” he would probably kick his ass. After all he was seeing like five of the cheerleaders even if he swore all he was doing was tutoring them. Yea right, he was alone with some of the hottest girls in school and all he did was help them study. To resist those girls you would have to be gay.

"Well maybe he is." Josh said to himself thinking about him and Max being together. What it would be like to have Max hold him in his arms, feel Max's hands run down his back, what it would feel like to have Max kiss him.

Josh was getting hard when his mom coming into the room pulled him from his fantasy.

"Oh I am sorry honey. I didn't know you were home. I just came up to get the clothes hamper…Is something wrong dear?" she asked seeing the expression on his face.

"Oh, what? No I'm fine just a bit tired." He said suddenly feeling guilty for how he had been thinking about Max.

"You look a bit upset, are you sure there's nothing wrong?" she asked sitting down next to him.

"No, just worried about Max is all. We've got a new history teacher and he doesn’t like Pagans and since Max Is Wiccan he falls into that group. I am just afraid he will be harder on Max than with others if he finds out," Josh said his heart breaking. He hated lying to his mother, it wasn't that he wasn't worried, he was but what was really bothering him he couldn't tell her, not yet.

"Oh well, I am sure he will be OK as long as the few people who know are careful." She said with an odd expression.

"Yea you’re probably right. I just don't want anything to happen to him. He’s one of my best buddies." Josh said with a smile trying to get his mom to leave the room.

"Well then that's settled. I guess I better get the laundry done if you want to have clothes for tomorrow, if you’re sure there is nothing else bothering you." She said as she got up to get the hamper from the closet.

"Yea I'm sure." He lied.

He lay back on his bed as his mom left the room. It hurt to lie to her. The two of them had always been close. He used to be able to tell her anything but ever since he started having feelings for Max they had drifted apart and it killed him to lie to her when he was feeling down about everything.

He and his father had drifted even further than him and his mom, not because of his feelings but because his dad had been made supervisor of the factory where he worked and he left every morning at six and did not get home 'till around ten so they didn't have much time to talk to each other. It would come as a bigger shock to his dad than to his mom that he was gay but they both would probably get over it quick. Even so he was still afraid to tell them. He rolled onto his side feeling miserable about everything, his feelings for Max, His fear to tell his parents, and his fear that he might lose his best friend if he could not find a way to take care of his feelings.

He laid there feeling like hell not knowing that Max was feeling the same way two miles away.

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To be continued . . .

I hope you enjoyed the chapter, more to follow soon.
Thanks to Rush for assisting in editing my story.
If you have any comments, suggestions or criticisms I would love to hear it, email me at allenarcan88@yahoo.com, send me PM, or visit my discussion forum. I read and respond to everything.