Clueless Camping - 13. Past and future

The afternoon was getting hotter, so Evan, Chris and I changed into shorts. I was glad Jacob had reminded me to bring mine. We all helped clearing the table and carrying things into the kitchen. Benedicte and Kristin stayed there, chatting about girly stuff while they loaded the dishwasher and put away the cakes. Evan and Chris decided to take a walk along the beach. I think they needed to talk and perhaps cuddle for a while. Jens moved one of the patio recliners into the shade of a tree and proceeded to saw logs.

This left Mom and I together at the garden table, and she immediately went into her practical mode. She dug into her handbag and produced several items.

“Here is your new phone, Russell. It comes with unlimited international coverage, so take care of it. Put a password on it and do the track-my-iPhone thing. I charged it before we left home and entered the phone numbers of Evan, Kristin and me. You can add everyone else yourself.”

“Thanks, Mom. I’m going to text Jacob right away.”

While I got that done, my mom organized her other items.

“I’ve already transferred money to Jacob to pay for flights and other travel related expenses. It’s easier if you don’t have to buy tickets separately.”

“Thank you so much for doing this, Mom. It will be like having our honeymoon in advance. You’re the best.” I got up to give her a hug, and her delighted smile showed me how much she appreciated my happy reaction. I guess I haven’t shown her much spontaneous affection for the past couple of years.

“Here is your pre-paid card. I’ve set up an account with Bank of America and transferred 5,000 dollars into it. There is a spending limit of $3,000 per month and a max $500 cash withdrawal per week, but if you need to take out more, just email or text me and I’ll have the bank authorize it within 24 hours. I’ll add 2,000 dollars every month or make up the deficit if you’ve spent more.”

I was overwhelmed. “But Mom, that’s a lot of money. Surely I don’t need that much?”

“The lump sum should enable you to deal with any emergency. But in addition I want you to promise me something, Russell.” Mom’s gaze was a mixture of caring and determination, and I was unable to refuse.

“OK.”

“While you’re traveling I want you and Jacob to check into a good hotel at least once a week. Take hot showers, get your clothes washed, sleep in a proper bed, and have a good breakfast. Skype with Evan for half an hour or more, and send emails to me and ‘Dicte. You can backpack and do cheap accommodation the rest of the time, but this money is to give you some comfort at regular intervals. Will you do that for me?”

“Of course, Mom. I’m already grateful for the opportunity to travel, but this will make the trip even better.” I tried not to think of what else Jacob and I would be doing in those hotel rooms, in case I got a boner.

“You’re welcome, dearest. Oh, and call this phone number if you lose the card, so it can be blocked at once.” She gave me a piece of paper, and I added the number to my cell phone.

She picked up a folder. “This contains all the documents you need to apply for a marriage license in Denmark. Birth certificate and the other papers Jacob wrote to me about.”

I gulped. “Are you OK with us getting married?”

“Yes, I think it’s the right thing to do.”

“We’re not just doing it because of Father, or to get Jacob a Green Card. We love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together.” I blushed, but my voice was firm.

“That’s good to hear, Russell.” Mom smiled and patted my hand gently.

“And you don’t mind that we’ll get married in Denmark?”

“No, sweetie, I’m fine with that, and I promise to pay for Charlotte to come over here, as well as the family including Chris. Is there anyone else you’d like to invite?”

“Not really. I’m not close to any of my cousins on Father’s side, and in any case, I don’t want a huge reception. I don’t really know the Danish side of the family either, except perhaps Moffa and Mommar.” I knew my mom liked us to use the childish names we’d given her parents when we couldn’t pronounce the Danish Morfar and Mormor. Evan had grumbled a bit about it the last time we came over, but we’d complied, because our grandparents also expected us to.

“Ah, yes, well there is plenty of time to plan your wedding.” Now she was evading the matter. I would have let it slide before, but something made me ask now.

“Mom, have you told them? And what about Uncle Theo and Aunt Rikka?” Mom had one brother, Theodor, and one sister, Frederikke. They were both married with kids, two each, but Rikka lived in France, so we’d never met her or our French/Danish cousins, and Theo’s kids were four and six years younger than us. I couldn’t recall them from five years ago, and I had only a vague memory of my uncle and his wife, Anette. But if Mom wanted her siblings and parents at my wedding, I’d agree. Perhaps my Danish cousins were nicer than my American ones.

“No, Russell, I’ve avoided the matter so far, but I’ll talk to Mor and Far soon. I’m going to visit Theo and Anette, and I’ll call Rikke as well.” The look on her face told me she wasn’t looking forward to those tasks.

“They’re not going to approve, are they? And they won’t like me being with Jacob.” Not that I would let it influence me, but I felt sorry for Mom.

“Well, it’s not up to them, and their approval is certainly not needed. I’d like their support in dealing with your father, but that’s no concern of yours. But yes, you’re right; they’ll probably need some time to get used to the idea.”

“Do you think they ever will?”

“I don’t know, sweetie, but it’s one of the reasons I think it’s a good idea for you to go traveling with Jacob. Let the dust settle, as Chris said, and hopefully they’ll decide their love for their grandsons is more important than religion or appearances.”

“I guess it doesn’t matter in the long run. We’ve never had much contact with them, so if they write us off, it won’t make much difference.”

“No, but it will make future visits to Denmark easier, if my parents and siblings are on our side. And you and Evan might go to France with your husbands on vacation.”

“For your sake, I hope they’ll be fine, Mom. Maybe my cousins will be able to help convince Uncle Theo and Aunt Anette. Young people in Denmark seem to be very relaxed and tolerant.”

“Yes, you may be right, and hopefully your cousins in France are the same, although Louis is a staunch Catholic. He and Henry got on very well back when we got married.” Mom was too proper to roll her eyes, like I wanted to.

Oh well, I could see her point, but maybe her sister cared about Mom more than religions edicts.

“Mom, Jacob said Father came over here earlier to try and find me. He contacted Jens and Benedicte, but also other members of the family, and created an uproar. So perhaps everyone knows already?”

“I doubt he told them about Evan being gay, and since we didn’t know which way you leaned, he could hardly out you to the family.” Her words raised another, even more important question.

“Mom, did you suspect about us? Or about me, after Evan came out?”

“No, dearest, I had no idea. It came as a complete surprise. I’ll be honest and say I was as shocked as Henry when Evan told us about Chris.”

“Were you there when he told Father?”

“Yes, I was. I had just entered the study with some coffee for Henry, hoping to calm the discussion down. But Evan took the opportunity to tell us the truth.”

“Did you notice Father wasn’t surprised about Chris being Evan’s boyfriend?”

Mom shook her head; she clearly felt uncomfortable discussing the matter, and of course it wasn’t fair to do so without Evan present.

“So, you sent me away because you thought I might be gay too?”

She shook her head again. “Russell, that had nothing to do with it. My main purpose was to get you away from a chaotic situation which could have destroyed your peace of mind. I admit I had a selfish reason too, because I needed to deal with what had happened, and I felt it would be easier if you were safe somewhere else. Perhaps I could have found another way, but I was quite desperate at the time.”

I hugged Mom to show her I forgave her. How could I not, with the way things had turned out? Her decision gave me Jacob.

“I phoned Dicte,” Mom went on. “She came up with the idea, but I grabbed it like a drowning woman would clutch at a life vest. Actually, she wanted both of us to come to Denmark, but I thought it was better this way.”

“It was, but I wish you had talked to Evan.” I was still trying to come to terms with the idea my twin had suffered badly from my absence. I did my best not to blame Mom or myself.

“I know; I’m sorry. I didn’t realize he would take it so hard, and I should have. Also, I kept hoping the situation would get better. I certainly never thought you would be out of touch for three months.”

She took a deep breath, and I could see she wanted to change the subject. I decided to let her, but I was going to talk to Evan about why she hadn’t contacted us for so long. If we both asked her, she couldn’t go on evading the matter.

“Russell, did you cancel your enrollment at the Community College?”

“Yes, I did, Mom. I’m still waiting for confirmation from them. Evan is looking for art colleges in or near Chicago. I hope to go to one of them next year.”

I nodded shyly after she gave me an intense look. “I’ve taken up drawing again.”

“Oh, Russell, I’m so happy to hear that. I never understood why you gave up on your art talent.”

I hesitated but decided to be honest. “To please Father.”

“WHAT?!” Her shout woke Jens, who jumped up from his chair looking around wildly as if he expected an attack. Of course, Benedicte and Kristin chose the same moment to return to the garden, just my luck. All of them stared at my mom, who was slowly turning interesting shades of red.

“Mom, Mom, calm down. He never asked me to, but Father was so pleased when I packed away my art stuff. It was my choice, a wrong one. I know that now, but it seemed logical at the time.”

Kristin sat down at the other side of the table. “What are you talking about, Russell?”

“About giving up art after I was ill.”

She shot me a puzzled frown. “I thought you stopped drawing because your skill went away, and your hands shook too much.”

“Yeah, I had those problems for a while, but not in the past two years. Anyway, Jacob bought me pencils and paper, and I’ve begun sketching again.”

“Did you sketch while you were camping? Can I see the pictures?”

“No, I only started after we came home to Copenhagen. I’ll show them to you later, if you want.”

By now Mom had calmed down, and she smiled at me. “I look forward to seeing your sketches, and I’m pleased you want to go to Art College. Let me know when you have found a place and I’ll work out the financial matters.”

“Evan told me about the funds set aside for us. How come you never mentioned it to me?” I could hardly recognize myself, asking all these questions of Mom. If she was taken aback at my unusual behavior, she hid it well.

“I don’t know, Russell, somehow the subject never came up. Would it have made a difference?”

I shrugged; would I have chosen another college, if I had known I only needed Mom’s approval? Probably not, so why waste time being upset about it. “No, I guess not, but it’s nice to know I can make my own choices about studying. Or at least that I only need your agreement.”

“Well, I’ve brought some papers outlining the expenses which can be covered. We’ll have to work out how to deal with accommodation costs. We assumed you’d be in the college dorms for the first year or two, but of course you’re going to be with Jacob; with your husband.”

Mom suddenly laughed and shook her head. “I cannot believe you’ll be married before you’re even in college, Russell. You’re not 20 yet! And Evan won’t be far behind, if I know him right. He’s always been determined to keep up with you and stay close.” Her face fell and she sighed. “I don’t think he’s forgiven us for forcing him to go through high school without you.”

I didn’t understand. “What do you mean, without me? I was there for three out of his four years.”

“Don’t you remember? When Evan realized you were not going to get well soon enough to start with him, he wanted to drop out and wait for you. He begged us to let him start over again with you the year after.”

I frowned at her. “He brought it up, but I told him not to be ridiculous; there was no need to do that.” I thought back, and slowly the incident surfaced and played out inside my head.

***

I was in bed, feeling tired, bored and grumpy. It was two days before Thanksgiving, and I’d had a relapse two weeks before. I’d finally gotten back from the hospital, and the doctors had recommended plenty of bed rest, frequent but light meals, careful exercises of my wobbly legs and shaky arms, and no visitors with even the slightest colds. All plans for family visits had been cancelled, which was the only good thing to come of this mess.

Evan came in and sat down on my bed. As long as he was there, I didn’t care about any other visitors. High school had let out for the holiday weekend while I was in hospital and he’d spent most of his free time with me. But he’d been away all morning, doing our Christmas shopping together with Kristin who had arrived home from college the day before. She wanted it done now because she would be very busy in December.

“Arrgh, I’m worn out, but we finally managed to get everything.” Evan groaned and flopped on his back next to me.

“Thanks, Evan. What did you get for Mom, apart from the scarf?” Kristin knew Mom had been admiring these designer scarves she saw in New York when she visited our sister. She had phoned Evan and asked if we wanted to pool our money to get one. But we wanted to give her something from us too.

“That was easy; I got her a new photo key ring. I’ll put photos of us and of Kristin in the attachment tonight. And I thought you could give her the mug we bought in Denmark, the one with World’s Best Mom in Danish.”

“OK.” My lack of enthusiasm was probably obvious. I had no desire to be reminded of our time in Denmark. I closed my eyes and moved my hand slightly towards Evan. My twin immediately grabbed it and we lay there in silence for a while.

“Russ?” Evan finally whispered.

“Mmm?”

“Russ, I want to drop out of high school.”

“Mmm…what?!” This brought me out of the daze I’d slipped into.

“Oh, not permanently of course. I want to drop out and start again next summer, together with you.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Evan. You can’t do that.”

“Why not?” Uh-oh, I could hear my stubborn and headstrong twin emerge in full force.

“I’m sure you can’t just drop out of school for no good reason at all. Besides, Father would never agree.”

“Fuck him!”

“Evan!”

“I thought you’d be pleased.”

“Why would I be happy for you to waste a year of your life? It’s bad enough I have to.”

“But don’t you want us to go to high school together? Do all the things we talked about?”

“We’ll still go there together for three years.”

“It’s not the same.” Now he almost whined.

“I know, but there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“Yes, there is. I told you I wanted to wait for you—”

I interrupted him. “You’ve already made friends in your class, and you’re doing well. If you drop out, you’ll have to start over. Why would you do that?”

“I want us to be together so I can take care of you—”

Once more I cut him off. I did not want my twin to sacrifice himself for me. He’d taken care of me since kindergarten, and there was no way I’d let him do this too. What if I didn’t get well enough to attend high school? The way I felt now, I might never recover. “There’s no need for that, Evan. I’ll be OK.”

“But…but…”

I pulled my hand out of his and turned my head away, to signify the conversation was over, and Evan’s protests died out.

Other suppressed memories came to mind. Evan tried to bring up the topic on several occasions over that Thanksgiving weekend, but I cut him off each time. Oh right, he talked to our parents too, because both of them approached me about it. To my surprise Mom seemed to encourage me to consider the idea, even though she admitted it would be almost impossible to pull off.

“Russell, are you sure you’ll be OK with going to high school and being a year below Evan? He’s most insistent he wants to wait for you.”

“I don’t want him to do that for my sake.” I had checked online and found out Evan would have to fail the whole year on purpose, which would make Father go ballistic.

“Well, maybe he’s doing it for both of you? He says he wants you to be with him.” Her words caused a niggling uncertainty, but I quickly squashed it. Of course Evan would say that, because he knew I wouldn’t let him sacrifice himself. I argued as best I could.

“No, it’s better this way. It will be like having a popular, older brother, and he’ll look out for me. The difference between us will be even more obvious if we’re in the same year.”

Any doubts about my opinion on the matter disappeared when Father expressed his approval the next day.

“Russell, I understand you’ve told Evan he should give up his silly idea of redoing his freshman year?”

“Yes, Father.”

“I’m pleased to see you have better sense than to hold your brother back. It’s mature and considerate, something to be proud of, Russell.” He patted my head and smiled at me. I basked in the rare praise from Father and tried to ignore the hurt and betrayed look from my twin. After this no more was said about the matter, and I felt satisfied I had done something good and unselfish for my twin, for once. Then I’d done my best to forget the whole thing.

***

But thinking about it now, I felt my stomach drop into my shoes. Fuck! I’d been so certain Evan had offered to flunk out and wait for me, for my sake only. But now I was no longer sure I had done the right thing. Had Evan felt rejected and lonely, unwanted and insecure? Perhaps he had needed me to bolster his courage, like in the fun fair rides? A tsunami of guilt and regret threatened to wash over me and bring me down.

“Russell, Russ!” The sound of my sister’s voice and her hand shaking my arm broke into my reflections.

“What?” I came out of my daze to see three worried female faces around me. Something wet fell on my hand; I suddenly realized there were tears running down my face and dripping onto my lap. “Oh, sorry.” I grabbed a napkin and scrubbed my cheeks before blowing my nose. I put on my impassive face and sent Kristin a tentative smile. “Sorry Sis, you were saying?”

“Russell, what’s wrong?”

“Huh, nothing. I’m fine.”

The fury in Kristin’s face made me recoil.

“The Hell you are, Russ! You zoned out completely, your face was blank, and your eyes…! You weren’t even here! Mom kept saying your name and asking if you were OK, and you just sort of grunted ‘Fine’ or ‘Yeah.’ I’ve never seen you do this before. So don’t give me this ‘I’m fine’ bullshit.”

Oops. Of course Kristin hadn’t seen my zombie behavior, since when she and Evan were around I rarely went into that mode. Even if I did, their voices saying my name or the touch of their hands on my shoulder or arm immediately brought me out of it. For my parents I’d developed the automatic reassurances.

She went on ranting. “It was scary, Russell. Your face got all scrunched up, and then you started crying, but you were still zoned out until I touched you and yelled at you.”

I looked over at Mom, who was being hugged by Jacob’s mom. Shit.

“I’m sorry, Mom. I didn’t mean to scare you. I was just thinking.”

She wiped her eyes and took a deep breath. “I’ve seen you look and act like that so many times in the past two years, but you never cried.” Benedicte hugged Mom as her voice broke. “I’d ask if you were OK, and you’d smile and say ‘Fine,’ and either leave or keep reading the book in your lap. You turned the pages so slowly, it made me worry about your reading skills, but now I realize you were just pretending. Oh Russell, I’m so sorry.”

“I… What… Why… Sorry.” I felt extremely uncomfortable and looked around for ways to escape this conversation. What was she sorry for? I had been the one to hide my feelings.

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize how unhappy you were,” Mom exclaimed, and I wanted to sink into the ground. But once more my knight in shining armor saved me, totally unexpected but most welcome. Jacob suddenly came round the corner of the house, and I jumped up and ran to him.

“Jacob!” My cry must have alerted him to my state of mind, because he dropped his bag and let me run into his arms. I hugged him fiercely and felt all the tenseness and difficult emotions drain from me. Yes, this was where I belonged, and why I needed him close. I buried my nose in the hollow below his collarbone and inhaled the reassuring scent of my man. Mmm, I loved the way Jacob smelled; it went directly into my dick, making it swell with interest.

Fortunately, Jacob distracted me. “Hey love, what’s the matter? Are you still upset about your dad ambushing you?”

What?! How did he know about that? I pulled back to look at him, and he knew what my baffled face meant.

“My mum called me, and I left immediately.”

“But…but your studying?”

“Russell, do you honestly think a stupid exam is more important to me than your well-being?”

Oh, right, if he put it like that… “No, but the Mama Bears were there to protect us.”

“Yet you seem very happy to see me.” A subtle movement of his hips showed me he had noticed the bulge in my shorts.

“I’m always happy to see you; I miss you when we’re apart.”

“Yeah? You do?” His blue eyes lit up with pleasure.

“Of course I do, you silly Viking. And I’m really, really happy you came now.” I lowered my voice even more. “I was having an uncomfortable talk with Mom, and you saved me.”

I pulled his head down and kissed him to show my appreciation. Of course, this increased the problem with the lack of room in my underwear. But after I let go, Jacob looked over my shoulder and greeted my mom.

“Hello Isa, good to see you again.” Knowing she was behind me deflated me pretty quick, and I was able to turn around. As soon as I let go of him, Mom moved in for a hug and cheek kisses.

“Jacob, thank you for taking care of Russell.”

“You’re welcome; I enjoyed it.”

“So much, you’ve decided to do it for the rest of your life.” The twinkle in Mom’s eyes and her smile made us both smile back in relief.

“Yes, he sort of grew on me after a while, and now I can’t live without him.”

Hmff, the first part sound like I’m a mold fungus, but I guess he made up for that with the last bit.

Kristin joined us and greeted Jacob warmly, but then she scowled at him.

“I hear you’ve invited the annoying puppy to have dinner with us tomorrow.”

“Who? Oh, you mean Christian. Ehm, yeah I guess he did pant after you quite a bit five years ago, but he has grown up since then.”

Kristin gave a skeptical snort, and I had to admit Jacob didn’t sound too convincing. He quickly changed the subject.

“So, where are Evan and Chris?”

“They went for a walk along the beach. Maybe we can do the same?” I took his hand and tried to sound casual.

“Weren’t you busy talking with Isa?” Jacob looked at my mom, who quickly shook her head.

“No,” Mom said. “We had more or less finished the important matters, and we have all week to settle the details. Go find Evan and Chris. I think I’ll take a nap for a couple of hours.”

“Kristin, do you want to come with us?” Thankfully my sister shook her head to Jacob’s question and said she also wanted to rest for a while. She headed off to one of the patio recliners and settled in the shade, while my mom kissed my cheek and disappeared inside together with Benedicte. Jens was already slumbering again, now that the drama was over.

We walked down to the end of the garden and out of the small gate leading to the path to the beach. I decided to ask first and hopefully distract Jacob.

“Did your mom really call you about Father being here?”

“Yes, and I received a text from Chris as well.”

“But surely they told you he had left, and everything was OK?”

Jacob stopped and pulled me around to face him. “Was Evan OK afterwards?”

Oops, good point. “No, I guess he wasn’t.”

“And considering how you reacted after your dad’s first visit, I think I’m justified in worrying about your state of mind too.”

“Ahh, yeah you have a point.” He gave me a quick kiss, and we resumed our walk to the beach.

“Chris and I had a feeling your dad might turn up here. Both of us have prepared a warning text, which can be sent off with a few clicks. So when Mum called, I was already packing up to go.”

“Evan and I discussed it as well, and we also thought he might turn up here rather than the airport. But it was still a nasty surprise. He said some really awful things about Chris, and tried to get Mom to go with him, but she sent him away.”

“Good for her. Mum didn’t explain what happened, she just told me ‘Henry was here and upset everyone. Evan is having a breakdown, and Isa and Russell seem pretty shocked too.’ I told her I was coming, but it would take some time. She didn’t tell you I was on my way?”

“No, but that’s OK, it was a wonderful surprise.” I could see Jacob was about to take up the topic I wanted to avoid, so I quickly launched another diversion.

“Oh, and guess what? Chris is a trained Dom; he was even in a club in Chicago, before he met Evan.”

“Wow, really? How do you know that?”

“From my father’s accusations today. It turns out he has been spying on Evan ever since he left home.”

“What?! Are you serious?” Outrage replaced the curiosity on Jacob’s face.

“That’s why Evan was so upset today, he realized Father knew about his relationship with Chris before he told him and Mom. It was a complete surprise to Mom too, but Kristin said she had suspected Father had checked her out a few times. Oh, and Mom says she had no idea about Evan and me being gay. I can’t help wondering if she sent me away to gain time. She didn’t get in touch with Evan either, not even to tell him where I was, and it hurt him a lot.”

“You think she needed time to get used to the idea?”

“Or maybe to decide how to react? Whether to accept us or not?” I shuddered at the idea of my mom siding with Father and rejecting us if we didn’t conform to his ideals.

“At least she dealt with whatever problems she had without inflicting them on you. And she accepts not only you and Evan, but Chris and me too.” Jacob always looks at the positive side of things, and I love that.

“Yeah, that’s true. You know what she said, when Father told her about Chris’ past? ‘All I care about as a mother is for my children to be happy and loved. Our sons have found this with Chris and Jacob, and nothing else matters.’ It was awesome.”

“Sounds like Isa has decided her children mean more to her than her husband.”

“But to Father it’s the other way round. I think he might have come here today for her sake. He probably wouldn’t care if he never saw Evan and me again, as long as Mom was with him.” I couldn’t help the hitch in my voice at the end, and I scrubbed angrily at the tears threatening to drip from my eyes.

“Do you think he’ll keep trying?”

I nodded. “He loves Mom, and she’s told him what he needs to do in order to get her back. I think he might try to persuade her to some sort of compromise, but…” I left the sentence unfinished, and we stood in silence for a bit. We had arrived at the beach and looked around for Evan and Chris, but couldn’t see them among the scattered groups of people walking along the coast. The beach was narrow with grayish sand and not really suitable for sunbathing, and the water didn’t look too inviting either.

“Let’s walk along the beach,” Jacob suggested. I nodded and we set off.

“So, why were you upset when I arrived?”

Shit, he hadn’t forgotten. “Nothing important,” I tried to be evasive.

“Russell. Tell me please.” A firm but gentle pressure on my chin made me look at him, and I couldn’t resist the pleading in those vivid blue eyes.

“Ah, it’s complicated, but Mom said something which made me realize I made a mistake four years ago, and I hurt Evan without knowing it. And I sort of went into one of my…ehm… My spells, you know.”

He nodded and waited.

“Umm, well I was sad, crying a bit actually, and Mom tried to get my attention, but I didn’t respond until Kristin shook me out of it. So then Mom got all upset, and she tried to say she was sorry about not noticing I was unhappy before… And it was just embarrassing and awkward, and I wanted to get away. You arriving was a rescue sent from heaven.”

“Hmm, I see. Well, I guess Isa wouldn’t have let us wander off if she still wanted to discuss it.”

I didn’t reply, but enjoyed holding hands with my future husband as we walked on the wet sand along the beach parallel with the water. Would we be able to do this during our travels and when we were back in the US?

“What did you do that hurt Evan?”

Oh no, I did not want to start on that subject.

“Please, Jacob, can we not talk about it? Or at least not until I’ve had a chance to talk to Evan.”

“OK, Russ. Is there anything else you want me to know?”

So I told him about the travel money and the papers for getting married and showed him my new phone. Jacob suggested we send a text to Chris to ask where they were, and he got his phone out and gave me Chris’ number. I grinned as I made a call rather than text. The phone only rang twice before he picked up.

“Chris Aldercroft speaking.”

“Hi Chris, it’s Russell. Where are you hiding my brother?”

He chuckled, and I could hear him tell Evan: “It’s for you.”

“Hello?” Evan sounded unsure.

“Hi En.”

“Russ?”

“Yo, bro. No one else calls you ‘En’ do they?”

“Where are you calling from?”

“The beach.”

“The beach? How…?”

“My new phone. Anyway, Jacob and I are looking for you. Which way did you go?”

“Jacob’s here? I thought he wasn’t going to arrive until tonight.”

I turned a shy grin on my fiancé. “He missed me too much.”

“Oh, yeah. So he said.” We broke into giggles, and Chris was probably giving my twin the same confused stare that I got from Jacob.

“Anyway, Russ, we went left along the beach for a while, but we’ve turned back.”

“OK, we’re coming towards you, so we should meet soon.”

“See you, bro.”

“Ditto.”

I put my phone back in my pocket and reclaimed Jacob’s hand. A few minutes later I saw a tall dark-haired guy with a slighter figure almost dragging him along. I let go of Jacob and surged ahead: “Evan!”

He must have seen us, because we started running towards each other at the same time. As we got closer, I heard him calling my name, and put on a bit of extra speed. I needed to be with my twin, hold him, make sure he was OK, and apologize for hurting him with my inconsiderate and oblivious behavior.

We ran into each other’s arms and hugged. Evan put his head on my shoulder and squeezed me fiercely, and I held him tight. As we stood there something slowly dawned on me. For the past three years I’d gotten used to Evan feeling slim and fit compared to me. He still felt that way, but since I was no longer fat, or at least not nearly as well padded as I used to be, he must be thinner. I suddenly recalled seeing Evan naked in the hotel room the day before. I had been distracted by the love bites on his butt, and his admission about what he’d been doing with Chris, but now I realized there had been no excess fat anywhere on his trim and toned body.

“Evan, have you lost weight?”

“Nah, well, perhaps a bit.”

“Don’t let him fool you, Russell,” came Chris’ voice behind us. We turned to see him and Jacob stand next to each other, looking at us with protective love written all over their faces.

“He lost his appetite fretting over being out of touch with you, and I had to coax and cajole to make him eat. He’s dropped ten pounds over the past three months. I’m hoping a week in Denmark with you will put some of them back.”

Jacob laughed. “At least you’ll never go hungry at my parents’ house. They are typical Danes in that respect; there always have to be something to eat and drink to achieve ‘hygge[1]’ when you have guests.”

“Don’t remind me. I ate way too much of the delicious buns and cakes earlier.” Chris groaned with a grin.

I turned back to my twin, “En?”

“Oh alright, I may have lost some weight, but I’m OK now. The day we heard from you, Chris took me out for dinner to celebrate, and he joked about having to roll me home, I ate so much.”

I decided to let the matter drop since I could see Evan felt somewhat embarrassed about it. Chris would take care of him, and I would never be out of touch again. But now I knew why Chris had seemed so pleased the other night when Evan gobbled up his meal and even asked to try some of my pasta. He’d also bought Evan the largest ice cream cone at Christianshavn.

“Are you ready to go back now?” I asked Evan.

“Yeah, we’ve had enough of this beach.”

“It’s definitely not as nice as the west coast or Læsø.”

Jacob shook his head. “Russ, no beaches here can compare to those places, but there are plenty of nice beaches around Copenhagen, including Amager Strandpark. It is just north of your hotel.” He directed the last sentence to Chris and Evan.

“We could go there if the weather gets hot while we’re here. I want to catch up on my tan.” Evan took my arm and held it next to his, and I was surprised to see how much paler than me he was. That had never happened before.

“Sorry to disappoint you, Evan, but today is actually pretty hot for Denmark. The forecast for tomorrow is rain, and the temperature will probably drop a bit.”

“Oh, right. Well, considering what the weather was like five years ago, I’m not complaining.” Evan smiled at Jacob as we all started walking back to his parents’ place.

“Hey, 2009 wasn’t that bad, be glad you weren’t here in 2007, one of the shittiest summers ever.”

“But there was that huge rainstorm the day after we arrived; it was almost like being back in Florida.” As Evan said this, the memory immediately resurfaced in my mind. Dragør hadn’t been in the main part of the thunderstorm, but we’d watched on the news how various places across Denmark got hit by massive rain.

“Oh, that was nothing compared to what happened in July 2011, where half of Copenhagen drowned.” Jacob told us. “That event was a complete mess and cost a lot of money for the homes, businesses and public institutions that suffered from the flooding. There has been a lot of discussion about how to deal with future flash floods like that.” He and Chris were behind Evan and me, and they kept on discussion the topic as we walked.

I leaned closer to Evan to whisper in his ear. “I’m glad our future husbands get along.”

“Me too. Do you think they might want to share a house, eventually?”

Wow, I hadn’t even thought that far ahead, but as soon as Evan suggested it, the idea lodged in my brain as something I desperately wanted to happen.

“Oh god, I hope so, En. It would be a dream come true.”

“Yeah?” Evan pulled on my arm and swung in front of me, and I was shocked to see his green eyes sparkle with tearful happiness. My own eyes immediately filled too.

“Fuck yeah!” We fell into a hug and had a small squeal-attack, and then we turned to stare pleadingly at our boyfriends.

“Uh-oh.” Jacob gulped.

“Now what?” Chris crossed his arms.

I nudged Evan. “Maybe we shouldn’t ask them yet?”

“Hmm, you may be right.” Evan bit his lip and contemplated the matter while his eyes went from Chris to Jacob and back. “Yes, I think we’ll have to work out a strategy, Russ.”

“OK.”

We turned our backs and resumed walking. Behind us we heard two exasperated groans, and Jacob asking “Do we even want to know?”

Chris sighed, “I expect we’ll find out soon enough. I can recognize the signs of another of Evan’s devious plans.”

“I hope you know I’m having a hard time saying no to anything Russell wants.”

“Tell me about it.” Chris chuckled, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Evan toss his head, and most likely roll his eyes too. He probably wanted to argue that Chris said no plenty.

“Not that he’s a demanding guy, quite the contrary. But maybe that’s why I can’t say no.” Jacob’s musings were making my ears burn, and I tried to walk faster. Anyway, it wasn’t true, or I’d have lost my virginity already. But I wasn’t going to use that as a counter-argument!

We reached the path going up to the house, and I pulled Evan’s arm. “Let’s run ahead, so they can grumble in peace.” He grinned and took off with me tearing after him. We only slowed down as we came round the corner of the house. Jens and Kristin were both fast asleep in the shade, so we decided to go into the house. Following the muted sounds from the kitchen, we found Benedicte busy with preparing dinner.

“Hi boys! What have you done with Chris and Jacob?”

“We left the old men behind on the path.” Evan snickered and grabbed a piece of carrot from the bowl and ate it.

“Wash your hands first, young man!” Benedicte scolded, but she also smiled at my exuberant twin.

“What are we having for dinner? Do you need any help?” I knew talk of food was a good distraction. Evan and I went over to wash our hands at the kitchen sink while Benedicte explained about the meal. I noticed Jacob look in at us through the open kitchen door, but he turned around and probably went back outside. I liked the idea of him and Chris talking and hopefully becoming close friends, especially if we were all going to live together at some point in time.

My future looked so much brighter than my past.