Boss Nanny - 17. Aidan vs. Matt

“Fuck you.”

Matt pouted at Kase’s faux aggressive words. There were no hard feelings, just a little jealousy that Matt got to spend the weekend with professional athletes and Loren Patrick.

With his arms open for a hug, Matt walked toward Kase but Kase turned sideways, earning himself a super awkward half side hug.

“Don’t touch me,” Kase growled, not even trying to shake Matt off. “I haven’t forgiven you.”

“You’re the one who told me to have him make a drink for me.”

“I didn’t expect you to do it. Or to end up in so many of his videos. Not fair dude, not fair.”

“What if I told you I brought you back something?”

Kase looked over his shoulder with a half glare, half curiosity. “Like what?”

Pulling his phone from his back pocket, Matt queued up a video he’d been eager to show his best friend. He held the phone in front of Kase so he could watch as he worked.

Loren was on the screen, smiling.

“Hey Kase! Matt talked about you so much I feel like I know you. Next week I’m starting a new segment. Instead of coffees, I’m going to create some awesome adult beverages. Since Matt made you sound like a real peach, I decided the first drink is for you. It’s a peachnada. Like a mangonada with a twist. I was thinking you could join me virtually and help assist? Let Matt know if you’re interested. I hope to meet you soon!”

Kase stopped making food and tackled Matt. “I get to be part of his debut segment?! Ohmygod! You’re the best friend ever!” Kase peppered his face with kisses, making Matt laugh hysterically as he squirmed on the ground.

“What’s going on here?”

It didn’t matter that Kase had been around Seamus outside of work or that they were friends on social media, he was still terrified of him. Laying on top of Matt and peppering his face with kisses was probably not earning him any points. Kase scrambled off Matt so fast he lost his balance and stumbled into the counter, knocking over the whiteboard display.

Still on the floor, Matt couldn’t help but laugh at his floundering friend. Even Seamus, who was watching the whole thing with Aidan on his hip, found it amusing.

Kase righted himself and straightened his apron. “Loe made a video and a drink special asked me to virtually,” he stuttered incoherently. He couldn’t even manage a real sentence; he was so flustered. Finally, he gave up and grabbed the tub of dirties. “I’m going to wash the dishes.”

Kase hightailed it out of there with his pride between his legs while Matt got up off the floor and kissed Seamus. “Hello.”

Seamus blushed. He was about to respond with something cute when Aidan ruined the moment. It was Matt’s fault really. He shouldn’t have kissed Seamus when Aidan was so close, he knew what the outcome would be.

“Ow ow ow ow ow,” Matt cried as he tried to pry the tiny fingers of death from his cheek. It hurt so bad his eyes started watering. Luckily, Seamus made quick work of unlatching Aidan and reprimanding him for his actions. What was kind of cute when it started was becoming a serious nuisance.

After explaining to Aidan what he’d done wrong (for the tenth time), Seamus set him on the ground and went to Matt’s aid. Of course, Aidan didn’t like that. He picked him up off the floor and followed Seamus, clinging to his leg as Seamus looked at Matt’s face.

“Oh man.” Seamus tilted Matt’s face. His cheek was red and there were obvious nail marks. “Aidan got you good. Poor baby,” he said, then gingerly kissed Matt’s cheek. All the while, Aidan was crying at Seamus’s feet, both for being abandoned and for giving attention to Matt.

Seamus ignored him. Aidan screamed. Kase popped his head out from the back to see what the commotion was. It was a disaster. All because Matt and Seamus kissed.

****

“C’mon.” Matt stood in the hall and waited for Aidan to follow. The defiant toddler stood next to the couch, looking at Matt, but otherwise remained unmoving. “Aidan…”

Ignoring Matt, Aidan threw himself on Seamus’s lap. Almost as if throwing it in Matt’s face. Seamus wouldn’t have it and quickly set Aidan back on the floor before joining Matt in the hall.

Even with Seamus on his side, it hurt Matt’s super big brother feelings that Aidan seemed to despise him. It felt like he couldn’t win.

Seamus leaned close and whispered. “Do you want me to put him down real quick?”

“No, I can do it.” Matt appreciated the offer, but he needed to do this. “It’s time for bed, Aidan.”

Aidan shook his head and ran in the opposite direction. Matt gave chase. Aidan was slow and quick at the same time. The hardest part was not accidentally tackling the kid out of anger. He finally caught the tyke and scooped him up. Aidan screamed and tried to throw himself at Seamus as they passed. Somehow he grabbed Seamus’s shirt and white knuckled the damn thing until it practically ripped off Seamus's body.

Getting Aidan to bed was a doomed effort. Aidan had nothing better to do than scream from his crib. Matt was fine letting him do it even though it was hard to listen to. He and Seamus sat in the hall hugging each other as Aidan’s screams pierced the late hour air. It had been an hour. Aidan was tired. Matt was tired. Seamus was tired.

Matt gave in. He couldn’t take it anymore. He thought that since Aidan had been crying for so long, he’d be happy no matter who came in to grab him. That was not the case. When Matt reached for him, Aidan screamed for his Moose then threw himself toward the other end of the crib, away from Matt, crashing into the rails.

Matt bit back his emotions and left the room. None of this was worth Aidan hurting himself over it.

Seamus was standing in the hall with a pained yet sympathetic face. It was hard to watch the two people you love fighting like that.

The second Matt looked at him, Seamus raced into the room and lifted Aidan from the crib.

And just like that, Aidan was quiet.

Seamus to the rescue.

Matt stood in the hall for a moment with his head in his hands. The posture of a total failure, or so it felt. The soft, consoling whispers and absence of screaming confirmed what Matt knew— he was in over his head. No matter what he did, he couldn’t do right by Aidan.

Even in their room, he couldn’t escape the proof. Baby sniffles and Seamus’s soft whispers sounded from the monitor. Words that Matt could only dream of whispering.

Matt shut the monitor off and went to bed.

****

Unsurprisingly, Aidan wanted nothing to do with Matt the next morning. That’s just how things were. Matt fought him during breakfast, fought him getting dressed, and fought him all the way to daycare. Did it hurt? Abso-fucking-lutely.

Something had to give.

****

The cafe might’ve been slammed, but he was working with Kase and Hilary. They were the dream team and slayed through the shift like butter.

When it slowed, Matt took dishes to the back and used the solitude to clear his head. It had been a rough week with Aidan, and it was wearing on him. Nothing like taking a power hose to really get those emotions out. When he was done cleaning and putting everything away, Kase and Hilary cornered him.

The once bustling cafe was now empty.

Not a single customer in sight.

No one to stop his friends from meddling in his business.

He looked between them. “What?”

“You’re quiet today.”

“Are things still rough with Aidan? The apartment?” Kase asked.

Matt nodded. No use in lying. “It’s not great. I knew he’d go through hard phases, but was not prepared for this. I’m failing him.”

Hilary frowned sympathetically. “You’re not failing him.”

Matt scoffed. “Feels like it.”

“Whoa there,” Kase put his hands on Matt’s shoulder. “Aidan has everything he could want and more. He’s loved and cared for. He has more clothes than I do, and the Cadillac gaming chairs.”

“It’s a car seat.”

Kase waved him off. “That’s beside the point. What I’m saying is, Aidan has everything and that’s because of you.”

“Because of Seamus.”

The friends rolled their eyes at the same time.

“I’m serious. I haven’t done anything. Seamus watches him all the time. Even when Aidan’s in daycare, it’s Seamus who mostly drops him off and picks him up. It’s no wonder Aidan doesn’t want me. He doesn’t even know me. I might as well be a stranger.”

Hilary frowned. “You make it seem like Seamus is doing something wrong. Is everything okay between you two?”

“We’re fine. Seamus is perfect. He’s the literal perfect person to raise a kid with. It’s me who’s not okay. I’m trying not to be irritated, but the more Aidan hates me the more I resent Seamus. I know that sounds bad, because it’s not Seamus, I know it’s not, and I know he does everything he can to assist me, but it sucks to be left in the dust. I just feel like I’m not doing enough. It’s hard to balance everything.”

“If you’re feeling like you’re not doing enough with Aidan, why are you still working here? You don’t need two jobs. You don’t need the cafe.”

“I wouldn’t see you guys.”

Kase smiled, and Hilary melted. “Of course you will. We’d always be here for you.”

“We might have more fun if we weren’t always here together,” Kase added.

“Maybe,” Matt agreed. “But I like this place.”

“But you love Aidan.”

They had a point. As much as Matt wanted to be able to do it all, working two jobs wasn’t more important than Aidan. Dropping the cafe would give him more time with his brother. Adjusting his schedule was something Matt needed to seriously consider before things with Aidan escalated even more.

Before he left work, Matt swung into Denise’s office. Maybe it was on his face, he wasn’t sure, but she clearly knew what was coming.

“Don’t be so nervous,” she laughed.

“I don’t want to leave you in a lurch.”

Denise waved him off. “Don’t you worry about that. We have a great crew. Are you working for Seamus full time now?”

“Eventually, but right now I need to spend more time with Aidan.”

“That’s noble, Matt. I’m proud of you. You stepped up when he needed you and you’ve persevered. It’s been a pleasure to watch you and Aidan grow.”

Matt felt a little emotional. He really loved working at the cafe and Denise was one of the best bosses he ever had. How many managers would let you bring your infant brother to work? Not many, he was sure of that, but Denise did. She was accommodating and encouraging. It was going to be hard to say goodbye.

“Ahh,” she frowned. “Don’t get emotional. It’s just a job. You’re off to bigger and better things.”

“I know, but you’ve been a great boss. I really appreciate you. I wouldn’t have been able to do any of this without you.”

“It takes a village and I am but one villager.”

Matt smiled. “Villager of the year.”

Denise bowed and then gave Matt a hug. “Don’t be a stranger,” she said. “Make sure you come in regularly and bring Aidan with you.”

“I’ll see you for the next two weeks, right?”

Denise shrugged. “I’m not going to tell you not to come in, but we’re fully staffed, and there’s no need to waste another minute away from your brother. I’ll tell you what,” he grinned. “You come in twice a week, with Aidan, and I’ll take you off the schedule today.”

There was minor panic and anxiety as he thought about this moment being his last. But then again, the thought of having free time tomorrow for Aidan was very inviting. Matt stuck his hand out. “Deal.

It felt like the end of an era. This was his first job away from home. It’s the job he had when he brought Aidan home. It was where he met Kase, Hilary, and Seamus. He would miss working there, but he was ready to focus on moving forward.

To focus on Aidan.

****

Seamus was carrying a basket of dirty laundry through the apartment, but detoured to give Matt a kiss. “Do you have anything that needs to be washed?”

“I think I’m good.”

“How was your day?”

“Busy but good.”

Satisfied that Matt had a good day, Seamus smiled and went about his merry laundry way.

Aidan was sitting on the floor with a few toys. Even though Matt knew Aidan would freak out, he went to his brother and picked him up. It went okay, Aidan smiled, talked to him, and showed him his toys...until Seamus walked back by. Aidan didn’t care that Seamus was busy getting ready to fold laundry or that Matt wasn’t trying to kidnap him, he wanted Seamus and would rather die than be held by Matt if Seamus was in the same room.

Matt took a calming breath and walked to the kitchen with Aidan on his hip. Maybe pretending like Aidan was freaking the fuck out would somehow disable him. He read somewhere that kids are always looking for a reaction, so take the reaction away.

That plan didn’t work. Aidan cried and cried. Matt fought a good fight, but in the end, he set the toddler down by Seamus and watched as Aidan hurried to Seamus. You'd think the guy had chocolate crunch ice-cream bars in his pocket.

Matt decided to let Seamus handle bedtime. He was tired of fighting and Seamus wouldn’t get the same resistance Matt did.

And he didn’t. It was the earliest Aidan had gone to bed in weeks and they celebrated by cuddling on the couch, watching NCIS.

“Today was my last day at the cafe,” Matt said as Gibbs reprimanded his team for doing something he’d done before, but, you know, double standards...

Seamus shifted behind him. “I thought you were staying there until school was out?”

“I was. But then everything went downhill with Aidan. I need to free up some time for him. As much as I want to finish out the last few months with Hilary and Kase, Aidan is more important.”

“I’m confused. You gave Denise notice, right? Why didn’t you say something to me?”

“I was going to give her notice today, but she told me she was fully staffed and there was no need for me to stay and finish out the month if I had other things to do. Instead of questioning her motives, I took her up on the offer.”

“What are you going to do?”

Matt sat up so he could have a proper conversation with Seamus. “I don’t have it all figured out, but it’s obvious I need to spend more time with Aidan. With the new schedule, I should be able to take him to and from daycare every day.”

“That will be good,” Seamus encouraged. “I know you’re starting to resent me so let me know what I can do to help.”

“I don’t—”

Seamus grabbed Matt’s hand. “You do. I get it, I do. But I know there’s a fine line before that resentment grows into a beast of its own.”

He was right, Matt knew it. He leaned against Seamus and sighed. They should’ve talked about this weeks ago. “I don’t like feeling that way. I know it’s not your fault. It’s me and my insecurity.”

“I know,” Seamus laughed and rubbed Matt’s back. “I’ve actually been thinking about something. I didn’t think it was realistic, but if you’re not working at the cafe, it might work.”

Matt sat up and looked at Seamus. “What might work?”

“Maybe you and Aidan should stay at your apartment for two weeks or so.”

“Just me and Aidan?” Matt asked, confused. Why would Seamus want to get rid of them?

“Trust me, it’s not something I want, but it will be good and, at the end of the day, I want you to be happy. Figuring things out with Aidan will make you happy,” he explained.

“Or, like it’s done in the past, it will make things worse.”

Even though Matt had a valid point, Seamus wasn’t convinced. “As much as it pains me, I think he needs to detox from me. The first few days might be hard, but I don’t think it will take long for him to change his attitude. We’ll reintroduce me after two weeks, see how he reacts, and go from there.”

Matt stared at Seamus. There was no way Seamus was actually considering this. He’d been upset when Matt went back home for the summer because he thought Matt was leaving him or something crazy. Plus, his life revolved around Aidan. Now he was sitting there, saying they should live apart and basically not be part of their life for two whole weeks.

“What’s going through your brain right now?” Seamus asked. “You’re freaking out.”

“You never want to be apart.”

“You know what I want more than being with you and Aidan every day?” he asked. “Not seeing you doubt yourself every day. You are the most amazing person I know. I’m so honored to be with you, but I don’t want Aidan to be a problem between us. I want to solve this issue right now. If I thought there was another way, I would suggest it. Who knows, maybe this won’t work, but it’s all I got right now.”

Matt nodded and leaned against Seamus so they could resume the show. He was sad that Seamus wanted to live apart, but if he thought about it, under all that fear, was a hope that he was onto something.

****

Matt officially agreed to move back to his apartment. It was fine, he probably needed to go there anyway. He hadn’t been there since before Christmas and that was months ago. Matt was pretty sure there was a load of laundry in the washer. There was no salvaging it, if that was the case.

They decided there was no reason to wait. Matt and Aidan would start their new, temporary life on Monday.

The weekend was all about Seamus and Aidan. Seamus stopped letting Matt take the lead on things. If Seamus wasn’t going to see Aidan for a while, then he was going to feed him all the meals, put him down for all the naps, read him all the bedtime stories, and give him all the baths. They ate, they snuggled, they played. They even slept together. The thought of a three topping bed burrito sounded cute, but in actuality, no one slept but Aidan. It was fine because the time was precious.

Through it all, Matt couldn’t help but feel like this was goodbye. How could he not when he was packing so much stuff? They were literally moving out and Seamus didn’t seem upset.

He buckled a crying Aidan into the back of the SUV Seamus had loaned Matt for the summer, almost a year ago.

“Dad is taking him next weekend so we could spend some time together.”

“You know I’ll see you at work, right?” Seamus laughed.

“Yeah, but that’s at work. But by all means, if you don’t want to see me, then I’ll tell Dad not to worry.”

Seamus reached in the window and pulled Matt in for a kiss. “Of course I want to spend all the time with you. But the whole point of this is for you to spend time with Aidan. I can wait two weeks.”

“I can’t,” he pouted.

“I love you, too.”

“Whatever.”

Seamus laughed and gave pouting Matt one last kiss. “I kind of like that you can’t be away from me. Maybe when these two weeks are up, you’ll realize you want to live with me—officially.”

Matt rolled his eyes, but the idea was more and more appealing. Being with Seamus for the last few months was natural. They fit. The thought of giving up his apartment, and his independence, no longer terrified him. He wanted that with Seamus.

****

Matt was right. There was a load of clothes in the washer. And the dishes really should’ve been run back in December. Hell, Matt should’ve spent a little time at the apartment before bringing Aidan back.

Oh well. It didn’t matter because Aidan was having none of the new arrangement, anyway. The kid was clearly angry at Matt for leaving Seamus behind and dragging them to this unfamiliar hell hole.

In retaliation, Aidan refused to sleep. Matt tried everything; letting him cry it out, snuggling him on the couch, even taking him to Matt’s bed. Everything. It wasn’t until midnight, and after mutual tears shed, that Aidan succumbed to sleep.

Matt shot Seamus a quick text, tonight was terrible, then fell back on his mattress, exhausted. It had only been a few hours, but Matt already knew it was going to suck doing this alone.

“This will work out,” Matt told himself. “This will work out.”