Live, Love, Lose - 50. Chapter 50

Shift to George's POV  

George found himself racing through the hospital corridors once again. He was breathless, but he didn’t care, he needed to keep going. It was strange for it didn’t look like a hospital any longer. It was half destroyed. There was rubble everywhere. It was tragic.

He should have never left it. He should have never left him.

Why had he even left?

Just stop thinking! A voice shouted in the back of his mind.

He kept running even faster, but it didn’t seem to lead anywhere…It was hard to recognise anything anymore. He couldn’t find him…but after a while, he bumped into his uncle. At least he was fine.

“Uncle Robb!” He stopped just in time otherwise he would have literally bumped into him. “Where is he?”

“Calm down, George. He is alright. He is still injured of course, but he will make it through.”

He felt like a weight was lifted off his shoulders.

“I cannot say the same thing for Doctor Spencer though…”

Doctor Spencer…? He had been hurt too… He hoped it wasn’t too serious.

“What do you mean? He’ll make it through too, won’t he?”

The look on his face spoke for itself. He didn’t need words. His mouth became agape.

“No…”

His uncle licked his lips as he glanced away.

“He was fatally wounded during that night…nothing could have been done to save him.”

No…he couldn’t have died…not him…

Why him out of all people? Why was he a part of the numerous casualties? Why couldn’t have he just been wounded and recover like Carl?

He licked his lips too and looked anywhere but at his uncle. He couldn’t believe it.

He remained like this for a while, his feet shifting uncomfortably in his spot and his hands fidgeting and shaking. He really hadn’t seen it coming…

He couldn’t remain like this any longer. He was feeling like an idiot somehow. He starting turning away to leave, but next thing he knew his uncle was embracing him. He didn’t say a word. But it was better this way. He didn’t move, didn’t hug him back. He was too distressed to react anymore.

He couldn’t accept the idea that he would never see him again or hear him again. Hardly one day ago he was still there, putting all his energy in treating the wounded, and now…

He couldn’t be gone…not so suddenly.

Who would treat and take care of all the patients like he did?

***
Paul, Uncle Robb, and himself went to the graveyard after Doctor Spencer had been buried, to pay him their last respects, for everything he had done for them, and all the other patients he had taken care of.

This was one of the very rare occasions he had been willing to put a tie on with his shirt. He had never liked the concept of suits, but this wasn’t just any day. He could make an effort for this time only.

Margaret had preferred to stay with Carl, “to keep him some company after the tough ordeals he had to go through” as she had put it. He had guessed for a while now that she was too upset to show up there.

“Why don’t we just surrender?” Paul was the one to break the heavy silence after a while. “It’d prevent the deaths of so many innocent people.”

George mechanically curled his fist into a ball.

“Is it really worth it? What we’re fighting for?”

His words were left hanging in the cool air, blown away like the meaningless sounds they were.

They remained still and silent for a long while. Of course, they couldn’t just come and go back after only five minutes, but they were certainly not going to stay for one hour either. Around fifteen to twenty minutes passed, he’d say.

They didn’t bring flowers with them. His uncle said it was pointless. First for they wither way too fast, and then for it’s not when people have died that you should bring them flowers.

“May he rest in peace. At least, he won’t suffer from the horrors of the war anymore,” his uncle spoke solemnly.

And shortly afterwards, he started walking away. Paul was going to do the same, but…

“Aren’t you coming?”

No, he didn’t move. His body wouldn’t allow him to.

“Go ahead. I’ll catch up with you in no time.”

Paul didn’t move. He only contemplated him in silence. He thought he was going to embrace him, but he only put his hand on his shoulder. Then he left swiftly.

The sun was shining on the grave. Not what you’d expect for such a tragic and serious event. Unless… Was it like saying: Don’t be sad, keep going and save the ones you can?

This was probably just a coincidence. Had he been alive, the weather would have still been the same. Still, he wanted to believe it.

On the stone, it read:

In Memoriam

Charles Henry Spencer.

1905 - 1940

Beloved husband and father.

He couldn’t look away from it.

He didn’t even know he had children. Wait, maybe he had only one, but he should have figured it out. Normal men had a wife and at least one child. How awful for them.

They hadn’t been that close. It’s not as if it had been one of his relatives or Nathan… So why was it affecting him so much?

A death’s a death, his brain reminded him. And it’s not as if he had been someone you didn’t know.

His eyes were slowly becoming wet.

He had never wanted to live as much as he did at that precise moment.

He clenched his fist more tightly, so much so that he could feel his pulse beat under his skin.

“Doctor Spencer…I promise…I won’t give up. I’ll survive this bloody war. And I’ll become a doctor, the kind of doctor you were.” He needed to pause before he proceeded. “We won’t let the bloody Boches win. They’ll pay eventually.”

These weren’t words only pronounced in the heat of the moment. Nothing could make his determination waver.

He intended to keep that promise, no matter what. Even if he had to spend days and nights helping at the hospital.

He would stick to his words.

Hey!  
So are you all ready for the new year coming ?  
Take care ❤️