Like a Train Wreck - 1. Chapter 1: Misguided Lust

"Okay, so I'm not normal because I'm not doing the whole ‘I hate my parents, I don't want to move’ teenage bit, right?" Miracle grinned as turned around from working on packing stuff into boxes and looked at Lacey.

Lacey grinned at him from where she sat in the computer chair, tapping the top of a pen against her lips. "That is my diagnosis, yes."

Miracle grinned at her, shaking his head. "I love it here in Australia, but you're the only friend I have. You're the only one I will miss. Besides ... maybe people in America are different."

"You mean maybe you'll find someone who will love you?" Lacey questioned with another grin. "Other than myself, of course."

"Exactly." Miracle smiled and winked at her before stacking the boxes up, knowing the movers would be arriving at any moment to get everything.

Lacey nodded with a thoughtful look. "Fair enough."

The blonde stood up and moved over to give him a hug. "I should get going, but promise me you'll keep in contact," she said, her tone playful because she knew that wouldn't happen. "Don't forget me, okay?"

Miracle's arms wrapped around her, and he hugged her. "Never." he promised, breaking away moments later and watching Lacey smile before she headed out of his room.

New beginnings.

A new town, a new home, a new country. So many things to be excited about, and he was happy beyond belief. He was excited to get going as soon as possible, and at this rate it seemed they would be gone pretty soon. The movers had already arrived and had begun loading up their things when Miracle, his parents and his older brother, Hunter, left to grab some dinner and check into a hotel for the night since their flight was scheduled for the next morning.

Miracle followed his parents and Hunter inside, and a waitress approached them, showing them all to a table where menus had already been placed around at the chairs. Sliding into his seat, Miracle picked up his menu and his eyes began to trail over the selections.

Soon they had all placed their orders and the waitress jotted everything down, taking their menus and heading off.

"I haven't been able to apply to any colleges yet," Hunter said, looking up at their parents. "I have the applications, but they require an address and as of right now ... we don't have one."

She was the typical housewife, staying mostly at home and cleaning the house while she watched her soaps. She was a quiet woman and not one to speak much. At times, she could even be considered unsocial, but the one thing that she cared about most was her family.

Hunter was her pride and joy. He was her birth child after all, and Miracle often felt like second best in Martha's eyes because of this distinction.

"What town are we moving to again?" Miracle looked up and around at the other three.

"It's just a small community right outside of New York City," his father, Craig, replied while unwrapping his eating utensils from the napkin they had been wrapped in. "The company is wanting to expand, as I've told you."

Craig was a bit of a stereotype himself. The business man that woke up every morning to eat breakfast, drink a cup of coffee, grab his brief case, and head out to a full day of work. He didn't stay at home much and Miracle considered him to be more of a workaholic than anything else.

Miracle kept a lot of secrets from his family. They had no idea of the secret life he lived or the things he had done. He wasn't really sure how they would react if they found out. He didn't know if they would hate him, be upset with him, or simply not care. He thought he knew his parents, but sometimes he felt like he didn't really know them at all, like they were strangers to him.

What Miracle wanted to avoid most was disappointing them, making them regret opening their home to him and adopting him.

"I'm really happy for you, Dad. I'm really excited about ..." Miracle shrugged and a bright smile beamed across his features. "Well, everything."

Dinner soon arrived and everyone began to eat. There was a little chatter here and there but mostly it was a quiet affair. Miracle, as usual, finished before everyone else and asked to be excused. He took the room key that Martha offered him and headed off.

He walked out into the lobby and looked around in amazement at the décor. It was a very fancy hotel with rich, warm colored carpeting, high cathedral like ceilings, and a huge chandelier hanging right in the center to add the final touch. He continued to walk around as his eyes wandered over the new scenery, and he was lucky that he didn't run into someone or something.

Stepping inside, Miracle pressed the button for the third floor and watched the doors slide smoothly shut. He leaned back against the wall and basked in the silky slide of the cart on its upward travel.

He loved elevators, loved the feeling they induced. It was one that he didn't quite know how to describe but to him, the odd feeling was odd in a good way.

There was another chime.

The elevator stopped on the second floor and the doors slid open to reveal a man that appeared to be in his mid to late twenties. He was muscular and a little rugged looking but in a good way, especially with the suit that he wore.

"Third floor too?" Miracle asked.

"Fourth." the man answered in an accent that was clearly American.

He saw the grin on the man's face, the way his eyes were trailing over his small form. It was then that Miracle pushed away from the wall and stepped towards the man, his head tilted back to look up at him.

"You see something interesting?" Miracle asked, a mischievous grin playing across his youthful features.

The man looked down at Miracle and his grin became larger. He was clearly amused. "What I know is that I see something that I want to investigate," he said, offering out a hand to Miracle. "The name’s Eric."

Miracle grinned at his words, taking Eric’s hand in order to shake it. "Miracle".

"What a unique name." Eric shook his hand but didn't let go. "Come with me to my room?"

By that time they had reached the fourth floor and the doors of the elevator slid open. Eric unlocked the door to his room and lead Miracle inside. The room was nothing short of amazing to the boy.

Eric moved over to a video camera that he had set up and turned it to aim it towards the bed. "Undress," he said softly, turning around to look at Miracle.

Fall of 1999

An eight-year-old Miracle sat on a bed, stripped of everything but his underwear. A coloring book was laid on the bed in front of him and crayons were scattered about, a red crayon held in his hand as he worked on coloring a picture of a train. It was then that he heard the door open and looking up, he saw a man walking into the room and heading for the camera that he had aimed at the bed.

The man grinned at Miracle, reached up to take the lens cap off the camera, and turned it on to record. He then worked on adjusting everything to exactly how he wanted it.

"Just keep doing what you're doing," the man said.

Miracle stared at the man and then his eyes shifted to the camera. There was a blank expression on his face, not understanding what was really happening. He then looked back down to his coloring book and went back to working on the picture.

"Take off your underwear," the man ordered after having the camera set just like he wanted it. He then looked over at Miracle. "I love you ... and I promise we will be together forever."

Miracle could hear those last words echoing in his head clearly even after the images from his memory faded.

‘I love you ... and I promise we will be together forever.’

‘Love’ and ‘Forever’. Two words that held such great meaning to him, and yet he had never truly experienced either one. He had yet to find someone who would be able or willing to provide him either, or both. Eternal love … he craved it and needed it like he needed air.

He wanted to be loved ... forever.

Eric stared at Miracle as he seemed to have zoned out, and waved a hand at him. "Well?"

Miracle blinked and shook his head to clear out the memories. "What?"

His eyes found Eric again. "I'm sorry I ..."

"You zoned out," Eric interrupted, a grin appearing as he, too, shook his head.

"Yeah ..." Miracle looked at the camera. "Do we ... well, do we have to use that? It makes me uncomfortable."

Eric looked between Miracle and the camera as if debating on which one was more important to him. After several moments, he placed the lens cap back over the lens. "We don't have to use it."

"Thanks." Miracle said as a soft smile appeared on his lips, happy by how understanding Eric was.

After a moment, Miracle stood up from the bed and started to shed his clothes. He was the picture perfect example of a ‘twink’. He stood at only five foot seven and weighed about a hundred and forty pounds. He didn't have a single hair on his body that could classify him as manly in any way, and his skin was perfectly smooth all over and baby soft to the touch.

The next hour was pure bliss. However, this man had been more dominant than he had expected. His wrists were handcuffed to the bedposts and the sounds of the springs squeaking beneath them filled the room, the thuds of the headboard hitting the wall every time Eric plunged forward.

Their moans mixed together as Miracle's body rolled and writhed beneath the larger one and Eric’s hands moved about as he enjoyed his body.

To Eric ... Miracle's body was perfection.

The mix of pleasure and pain was a cocktail that Miracle had never gotten before. It was always one or the other, never both at once. His smooth stomach pushed forward as his back arched, and a loud moan escaped while his wrists pulled against the restraints of the handcuffs and he released, the sweet warmth spilling out between their stomachs and smearing all over their bodies in their joint movements.

It was only moments later that Eric released, and Miracle got to experience the warmth of it as it filled him up. That was one of the few things that he craved about sex … the ending, the moment in which another spilled himself inside of him.

The aftermath was also something that he enjoyed; to be held, to fall asleep with another. To feel loved, even if only for a moment. Though, he endlessly hoped that he would be given love in exchange for sex.

Why did he think he would be given love in exchange for sex?

That was something he had thought about. He always figured that having sex with someone was a way of showing complete trust, and he always hoped that people wouldn't break that trust. He just hoped that eventually he would find someone who wouldn't break it. Though, the issue was much deeper than that. From past experiences he had been lead to believe that sex did create true love, and the magic of movies only helped to further influence such false beliefs.

Eric grinned and breathed out heavily, "Fuck ... that was amazing."

He pushed himself off of Miracle, grabbed the key, and unfastening the handcuffs before he climbed off the bed.

Miracle watched him get off the bed and at that moment, the coldness began to set in. Sleeping with someone was always enjoyable but every time they left without showing a single sign of love, he couldn't help but to feel so alone. He pushed himself to sit up; grabbing the sheets and pulling them close as his legs were pulled in and hugged to his chest. "Where are you going?"

Eric used a towel to wipe himself clean, and then moved to grab his clothes. "I have to meet my fiancé." he replied, looking down at his watch to check the time. "Soon."

Fiancé...he had a fiancé!! Miracle had been nothing more than a quick fuck for him. He frowned and looked down towards the mattress, not understanding or rather refusing to understand why this kept happening.

He would have been willing to do anything for Eric despite the fact that he knew hardly anything about the guy. He would have even run away with him … would’ve left his family and everything behind just to be loved by Eric.

Eric fastened his pants and looked at Miracle, a hand moved to his chin to lift his head up and a grin appeared. "You were great."

Releasing his chin, he moved away to put the rest of his clothes on. "Listen, we'll be going to dinner so we shouldn't be back for about an hour. So stay ... freshen up ... just be gone before we get back."

Miracle looked at Eric and the tears burned at his eyes. He felt so stupid, so worthless. He felt like a piece of trash. Once an object of worth, now an object that was used and being thrown away. Why couldn't he just be a person to someone? He had feelings. He felt worse than a whore.

At least they get paid. Miracle thought bitterly, twisting the edge of the sheet between his fingers.

Eric moved over to the door and looked back, his hands working to straighten out his clothes and hair before he opened the door. "Oh … and lock the door on your way out."

Eric grinned and walked out, closing the door behind him. The door closing sounded just like so many before it had sounded … a thump of finality.