Tales of the Underground: Velocity - 13. Chapter 13

That night I slept like a baby. I know intentionally causing an accident would haunt most people but I didn’t care. I did what I had to, to provide for my family. It’s kill or be killed, and I don’t plan on dying anytime soon.

My dad walked into my room and woke me up before he left for work. I could tell he wasn’t happy. He slammed my racing helmet down on the post of my bed and stared at it.

I wiped the crud out of my eyes to try and get a better look at him. “What the fuck dad? It’s 6 AM” I groaned.

He looked up from the helmet and I could see it wasn’t me he was mad at. “The minivan won’t start. Can you drop me off at work? I can have one of the guys there take me home when I get off.” I could see the stress in his eyes.

I sat up and stretched “Can’t you just drive the mustang yourself.” I groaned dying for an hour more of sleep.

“It’s a tad bit too...” I could see him trying to find an appropriate word.

“Fast” I answered with a smile.

He let out a big sigh “Yeah…fast” he finally answered. I think it took him a lot to admit that he couldn’t handle the car that I drove almost every day. I don’t blame him though. Jacob has modded the shit out of it over the past few months. He’s done everything from making it louder to swapping out the whole insides.

I stood up and picked up my helmet. “Just give me a minute to get ready and I’ll take you.” It was weird talking to him like I was the adult. “I’ll even have Jacob come over and take a look at the minivan after school.”

He once more stared at the helmet in my hands. “We’re not gonna need that right?” he asked nervously. It was funny to me that my dad was actually scared of how I drive.

I threw on a shirt and started rummaging through my drawers to find a clean pair of shorts “Maybe” I teased with a smile. My dad rolled his eyes and left so I could finish getting ready.

I walked down stairs with my helmet on my head and saw my dad smile for the first time in what felt like years. He smacked the back of it and we went out to the car.

When I sat in the driver’s seat my dad pulled the helmet off my head and threw it into the back seat. “I don’t want you driving with that thing on when you don’t have to.” He said sounding more like a dad now.

I turned the key and the familiar roar of the engine filled the air. “I don’t think there’s a time I shouldn’t be wearing it then” I said with a laugh. I could tell he was taken back by how powerful the car sounded.

He sat up straight and grabbed onto his seat. “Nice and slow Jamie.” I could tell he was regretting his decision to ask me to drive.

I rolled my eyes “Come on Dad, slows not in my vocabulary.” I saw him smile again

“Judging by your grades that’s not the only word missing.” It was nice to get to spend some real 1 on 1 time with him. “So what exactly have you guys done to this car?”

I swayed my head back and forth “Let’s just say the engines not the same one it came with nor the radiator nor the alternator nor the distributor nor the...”

“I get the picture” he interrupted “Jacobs really smart enough to do all that?”

“Oh yeah” I stated confidently “you’d be amazed at what a good team we are.” He smiled proudly for a moment then remembered what kind of team we were, and I saw guilt slowly drip back into his eyes.

“So the girls say you and Eli are back to being best friends?” My dad asked with a lot of curiosity in his voice. Damn it, I always forgot that they went to the same school as me, we never really run into each other but that doesn’t stop them from spying on what I do on a day to day basis.

“Yeah” I said looking straight ahead trying to hide a little blush I had going on “Don’t worry. I followed you’re instructions, he’s not involved in any of the races or anything.”

“That’s good.” I could see him thinking something over “So it doesn’t bother you that he’s a gay.” My dad was trying to be politically correct about it, but I don’t know if referring to someone as “a gay” was the best way to go about it.

My face started turning a little bit redder “It didn’t bother mom, why should it bother me?” I could feel my stomach starting to churn “Why? Is that a problem?” I nervously pushed out.

“Not at all” My dad said assuring me that our friendship was okay with him. “I’m just glad it’s not my son.” I couldn’t tell if he was joking or serious but suddenly I didn’t feel like talking anymore.

I laid my foot a little heavier on the gas and started driving a bit more aggressive. Not enough so that he would notice, just enough to get us there a tad bit faster. When we finally arrived at my dad’s factory he tussled my hair and thanked me for the ride.

On the drive home I began to question everything I had been doing. I got so wrapped up in Elijah that I never stopped to think about how it would affect everyone around me. I started nervously tapping my fingers on the gear stick.

Wait! Since when do I give a fuck what others think? Fuck it. I’m gay I confessed to myself. “I’m gay” I screamed at the top of my lungs in the empty car. Saying it out loud felt good. I said it again and again until it felt like a normal thing to say. No fuck that, it was a normal thing to say, I had just been taught it wasn’t. Those empty lies and false teachings held no control over me anymore. I’m my own damn man now. Fuck everyone who won’t like me because I’m gay. I make more money in a week then most of them make in a month. I felt the anger pulse in me as though it was alive.

So this is the feeling Eli felt those few years ago. No wonder he’s so strong. I couldn’t wait to see him. I kicked the car into high gear and speed through the morning work traffic. I weaved in and out like a spider crafting its web. I turned down the radio, the sound of the car purring was all I needed right now. I dialed in with laser focus and made it home in no time at all. Just like every other day I traded my car in for my bike and raced of for school. I knew I was gonna be crazy early but I didn’t care.

When I finally got to school I noticed Eli’s mom pulling up. I watched as he stepped out of the car grabbed his hockey bag and kissed his mom goodbye before she pulled away.

I ran up and grabbed the bag out of his hand. He jumped back not realizing who I was at first.

“What a gentleman you are this morning.” Eli teased finally realizing it was me.

I bucked shoulders with him. “I’m sorry about last night.”

He looked a little taken back. “It’s alright.” He said with a smile beginning to creep over his face.

“No, it’s not Eli.” I sighed “You deserve better. You deserve a boyfriend who will always be there for you.” I said loud and proud

He quickly shushed me “Dude its okay. Honestly! Now stop before you out yourself.”

“I don’t care” I said with the shrug of my shoulders.

Eli gave me a concerned look “What’s gotten into you?”

Together we walked to the locker room to drop off his bag and I filled him in on everything that happened that morning. Well, not everything, I left out the parts about the helmet and the speeding. I’m starting to become more protective about my secret identity more than my sexuality.

Eli was happy at my newfound confidence but reminded me of the dangers of coming out. He wrinkled his eyebrows a little struggling to find the perfect sentence “Maybe just tell Matty and Jacob for now, okay?” I could tell he was still thinking “It’s a lot easier when you have people around to support you. I’ll be there with you when you tell them, if you’d like.”

I suddenly found myself feeling guilty for abandoning him when he came out to me. I still remember that day. I walked right out of his house and never looked back. “I would like that.” I said grabbing his hand for a second but immediately letting it go. “I’m sorry I was never there for you back then.” I could feel myself starting to get choked up.

Eli placed his head on my shoulder for a quick second “You’re here now, and that’s all that matters to me.” He made a funny face and I could see the gears in his head moving again “My dad’s not gonna be happy but I can come over after try outs tonight and you can tell them then if you’d like.”

I thought it over for a second, my heart raced with the very thought. Jacob did have to come over anyway and Matty would most likely wind up tagging along. “I would like that” I said with a smile.

I’ve begun to feel an internal battle in me taking place, but when I’m with Eli it seems like the good side always starts winning. Maybe coming out will help. After all Matty and Jacob are my best friends, they’ll understand right?