Seth on the Road to Chaos - 6. Chapter 6

I pulled away with an astonished look. I couldn’t believe I had just kissed Blake. “I…I…I’m sorry,” I stammered nervously. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

A big smile appeared on his face as he said, “Why are you sorry?” He pressed his hand to his lips. “I liked it.”

“You did?” I didn’t pull away when he leaned forward and kissed me.

He then smiled and said, “Why would I mind a cute guy kissing me?”

“You think I’m cute?”

He leaned forward and kissed me again, only this time a little more passionately. He pulled away, smiled and replied, “Yes, you’re cute.”

I grinned and replied, “You are too.”

Blake reached down and took my hand. “I am so glad I met you tonight. When your friend was discharged the next day from the hospital, I didn’t think I would ever see you again.”

“I thought about you a lot,” I replied as I squeezed his hand. “I was worried about what had happened to you. When I saw you tonight at the game, I knew I had to talk to you.”

He smiled and asked, “Is that why you were behind me at the concession stand?”

If it hadn’t been so dark inside the car, I’m sure he could have seen how red my face was. “Yes,” I giggled. “I squeezed his hand tightly. “I’m glad we finally met.”

Suddenly, Blake’s mood changed. The happy smile disappeared. He pulled his hand from mine and sat up straight. “Look, Seth,” he said sadly. “I’ve had a good time tonight. But I don’t think it’s a good idea we see each other again.” He opened the door and started to get out.

“Blake!” I asked as I grabbed his arm. “What is wrong?”

He exited the car, leaned down with a sad expression and said, “I’m just not the kind of guy you want to get involved with.” He looked like he was getting ready to cry. “I had a good time tonight. Thanks.” He slammed the door shut, and I watched him walk toward the house. He was shuffling his feet like he had the world on his shoulders. He turned briefly and looked at me with tears in his eyes. He then opened the door and entered.

I sat for several minutes wondering what had happened. I thought about going to the door and knocking on it, but I didn’t know what I would say. Besides, Amber’s parents were probably home, and I didn’t want to make a scene in front of them. I saw a bedroom light come on upstairs. Blake walked to the window and looked out. He pulled the shades closed when he noticed I hadn’t left.

“What is going on?” I said to myself as I backed out of his driveway and drove away.

All the way home I tried to make sense of what happened. We had been having a nice time. We had kissed a few times, and we seemed to be getting closer. But then, his mood suddenly changed. I replayed the scene in my head trying to figure out if I had said or done something wrong. However, a switch seemed to come on in his head that he wasn’t interested in me.

By the time I pulled into my driveway, I had decided that it was probably best anyway. I didn’t want a boyfriend because then I could no longer keep my secret. I was already afraid that Ty had figured out what was going on. Then, Amber and the other girls know I’m gay. They saw me and Blake holding hands. Now, I was becoming afraid if others in the restaurant might have noticed. Craig seemed suspicious when he saw me sitting beside Blake. I still can’t figure out why he gave me an angry look. He was with Stacy. Why did he care that I was with Blake?

Mom was in the family room when I got home. She shouted out, “Who won the game?”

“We did,” I replied as I entered the room. She was curled up under a blue blanket on the sofa. There appeared to be some romance movie on television.

“Where’s Stacy?” she asked. “She didn’t come home with you?”

I replied, “She is with Craig.” I told her about seeing them at the pizza place.

A worried look appeared on her face. “I hope she doesn’t stay out too late.” I looked at the clock on the wall. It was already a little after midnight.

I stretched and yawned. “I’m tired,” I said. “I’m going to bed.”

I stripped off my clothes and went into the bathroom across the hall. As I showered, I still couldn’t get Blake out of my mind. He is really cute, and I had hoped that we could be friends. I was fascinated with him the first time I saw him in the hospital. I couldn’t believe that fate had brought us together again. However, now, I’m confused if that is a good thing or a bad thing. He said he’ll be attending my school. Perhaps, I’ll run into him again. Maybe we’ll even share a few classes together. I would like that. However, after his strange behavior earlier, I’m not sure he will.

I dried off, wrapped the towel around my waist and headed back to my room. I closed the door and stopped suddenly. Craig was sitting on the edge of my bed. He rose when I entered.

“What do you want?” I asked worriedly. He had an angry look on his face as he walked up to me.

He pushed me in my chest, and I took a step backwards. “What is going on, Seth?’

I looked quickly at the door and asked, “Where’s Stacy?” I didn’t want her to come barging into the room and seeing me standing nearly naked in front of her boyfriend.

“She’s downstairs talking to your mother,” he replied as he poked me again in my chest. “I asked you what is going on?”

I asked nervously, “What do you mean?”

He poked me again. “Who’s that fucker you were sitting beside tonight?” He suddenly reached out and yanked the towel from around my waist. I was humiliated as I stood naked in front of him. I quickly covered my cock with my hands. He poked me again. “Who was that fucker?”

“I don’t know,” I lied. “I sat down to talk to Amber, and he sat down beside me.” I reached my hand out and begged, “Can I have my towel back?”

He grinned and ordered, “Turn around.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” he said sharply. “Turn around. I want to see your ass.”

“Craig, please!” I pleaded. “Let me have my towel.”

He grinned and held out the towel. When I reached for it, he pulled it away. “Turn around.”

I knew he wouldn’t give me the towel until I turned around. Reluctantly, I turned.

“Nice,” he said lustily. “That’s going to be mine soon.”

I turned nervously and held out my hand for the towel. He grinned and handed it to me. He approached, took my hand and placed it on his hard cock. He gently rubbed it against his athletic shorts. He said urgently, “I could sure get off right now.” He grabbed the rim of his shorts and pulled them down as his cock jerked before me.

I looked quickly toward the door. “Craig,” I said nervously, “We’re going to get caught.”

He reached up, grabbed my shoulders and tried to push me to my knees. “Just a quickie,” he begged. I dropped to my knees. But just then Stacy shouted up the stairs.

“Craig? Where are you?”

“Shit,” he spat as he quickly pulled up his pants. “I’m talking to Seth!” he hollered out.

“Mom says you have to go,” she hollered. “It’s getting late.”

Craig shook his head and muttered, “Bitch.” I didn’t know if he was talking about Stacy or my mother. I jumped when he reached out and grabbed me around my neck.

“Listen, Fag,” he warned. “I’m the only one you mess with.” He tightened his grip around my neck. “Got it? If I ever see you with another guy, I’m going to hurt you.” He pushed me back, and I landed on the bed.

Before leaving the room, he warned again, “Don’t forget what I said.” He slammed the door behind him.

“Holy Shit,” I muttered as I sat on the side of the bed. What was that all about? Craig isn’t jealous because he saw me with another boy, is he? My sister is his girlfriend. Why would he care that I might be interested in another boy? That is, unless he thinks I am his.

Suddenly, I started to get scared. Just because I sucked his dick a few times doesn’t mean that I belong to him. I’m not his personal cocksucker. I knew this was going to happen when all this started. Craig is straight. Stacy is his girlfriend. I am her brother. Right now, he can talk to me without anyone becoming suspicious. But if I am outed because of another boy, then it all falls apart for him. I’m his convenient sexual outlet. After what happened tonight with the towel, I think he may be wanting more than just a quick blowjob. He did say that my ass was going to be his soon. I hadn’t even considered that he might want to fuck me. I am happy just giving him an occasional blowjob in my bedroom when he can sneak away. I’m not ready to go any further. I’ve seen videos on websites where guys fuck other guys. Most of the time they seem to enjoy it. However, I’m not sure. I’ve masturbated while sticking my middle finger inside me, and I liked it. However, my finger is small and thin. The thought of Craig’s big cock entering me scares me to death. I’m going to have to give this a lot more thought before I decide to do it. However, after tonight, I might not have too much to say about it.

I’m not strong enough to tell him no, and he knows that. He knows I don’t want anyone knowing that I am gay. That is why he is taking advantage of me. He saw it in the hospital that day. He’s probably heard Stacy talk about gay boys. There are a few that go to our school. Craig probably agrees with her so he won’t out himself. I just have a bad feeling that all of this is going to blow up in our faces someday. It could have happened tonight if Stacy or my mother had crept up the stairs and barged into the bedroom when I was standing naked in front of Craig. Or what if one of them comes in when I am on my knees sucking him. It almost happened last week when we were in the bathroom together. If the door hadn’t been locked, Stacy could have opened the door and caught us.

I walked over, turned out the lights and crept into bed. I managed to eventually fall asleep, but I kept waking up with fearful dreams. Each of them involved someone seeing me and Craig as we have sex. The last dream was Stacy walking into my bedroom while I was on my back as Craig rammed his huge cock in my ass. I woke up in a sweat when I dreamt that she left the room, returned with a butcher knife and stabbed me in the chest.

I awoke late Saturday morning. I didn’t sleep well, and I wanted to stay in bed much longer. However, my plans were ruined when Stacy barged into my room and woke me up. “Get up,” she ordered. “Mom says you have to take me to the mall.”

I mumbled under the blanket, “Fuck off, Stacy.” The last place in the world I wanted to be was following Stacy and her girlfriends around the mall on a Saturday afternoon.

“Mom said you have to take me,” she insisted. “Now, get up!”

“I said fuck off, Stacy!” I sat up and shouted. When I did, Mom was standing in the doorway.

“Seth!” she hollered angrily. “Stop using that kind of language.” I looked at Stacy who had a wide smirk on her face. “Take Stacy to the mall, or I’m taking away your driving privileges for a week.” Stacy stuck out her tongue and left the room. My mother stood and waited until I had gotten out of bed before she shut the door.

“Bitch!” I mumbled. I didn’t know if it was for Stacy or my mother. Probably both. When I entered the kitchen, Mom had left for work. It isn’t unusual for her to work several hours on the weekends. Maggie was sitting at the counter with Stacy drinking a glass of orange juice. She rolled her eyes when she saw me.

I opened a box of cereal and poured it into a bowl. Stacy kept telling me to hurry up and eat. I ate slowly, and I even ate a second bowl just to make her angrier. I had to sit and listen to them talk about boys. Naturally, Stacy talked about Craig, and Maggie seemed interested in Bobby Holliday, a boy in our class. I didn’t think he was very cute, but Maggie seemed to think he was. I was going to call him Pizza Face, but I knew it would only start an argument.

“Are you going to buy that green dress we saw a few weeks ago?” asked Stacy. “Bobby will like you in it.” Since the junior dance is next week, I assumed that Bobby had asked Maggie. Stacy and my mother had already bought what Stacy was going to wear.

Maggie looked over and asked jokingly, “Who are you taking Seth? Amy Four Eyes?” She and Stacy broke out into laughter. Amy is the ugliest girl in our class. She has mousy brown hair and big ears, and she wears a hideous pair of big red glasses that make her look like a clown. She has been the butt of many jokes since grade school. I always hoped that she would grow into a pretty girl just to show the others, but unfortunately, she never did.

“He’s a bonehead,” she giggled. “No girl would go out with him.”

I stuck my tongue out at her. “Just for your 411, I got a date for the dance.”

As soon as I said it, I regretted it. I didn’t want them to know that I was taking Roni to the dance. Our plan was to just show up separately, and then casually start talking. We thought it was best that it didn’t appear like a ‘date.’ I could tell by the surprised looks on Stacy and Maggie’s faces that they weren’t expecting me to say I had a date.

“Who are you taking?” giggled Maggie. “Amy Four Eyes?” She looked at Stacy and laughed. “I told you.”

I insisted, “I’m not taking Amy.”

Stacy rose from her stool and approached me. “Who are you taking, Seth?” I think she thought I was just making up a date.

I took a bite of my cereal and replied, “You’ll find out next Saturday.”

She looked over at Maggie and laughed. “See, he doesn’t have a date. He’s just shitting us, or he would tell us.”

“I ain’t shitting you,” I replied angrily.

“Yeah,” challenged Stacy. “Then tell us who you are taking.”

Before I could stop myself, I said, “Roni.”

Stacy’s eyes widened. “Roni?” she asked astonishingly as she looked over at Maggie. “You’re taking that dyke to the junior dance.”

“Shit, Seth,” hissed Maggie. “You can’t take her.”

I had already told them I was taking Roni to the dance. Now, I had to justify it, to them and myself. I knew when I asked her that there would be a lot of gossip. At least breaking the news to Stacy and Maggie might prepare me for what we could face at the dance.

“Why can’t I take her?” I asked. “We’ve been friends since grade school. She needed a date, and I needed a date, so I asked her.”

“But Roni?” asked Stacy. “You couldn’t ask a normal girl?”

“She is normal!” I shouted. “Just because she likes girls doesn’t make her a freak or something.”

“It does too!” yelled Stacy. “Jesus, Seth. What were you thinking?”

“It’s just a dance,” I insisted. “It’s not like we’re going to have sex afterwards.” I sneered and added, “Not like you and Craig.”

Maggie started giggling uncontrollably. “He got you there, Girl,” I enjoyed watching Stacy’s face turn red. She didn’t know that I knew her game. She let all her girlfriends assume that she was having sex with Craig. They were always making jokes about when the baby is due. Only I knew their secret. She refused to satisfy him. However, she didn’t know that he was using me to do what she refused to do.

“It’s still a bad idea,” she insisted.

Maggie looked at the clock on the wall. “We’d better get to the mall,” she said. “We’re supposed to meet the others soon.”

I took the last spoonful of cereal and hurried to the door. I wanted to leave before Stacy had a chance to question me anymore. However, I knew it wasn’t over. I’m sure she would have more to say later.

Since it was late Sunday morning, the mall was rather empty. Before hurrying off with her friends, Stacy warned me that I better be around to pick her up when she finished shopping. I considered leaving and making her walk home, but that would make Mom mad. She had already threatened to take away my driving privileges for a week. Abandoning Stacy at the mall would probably be a month without my car.

I entered a few shops, but I wasn’t in the mood to shop. Everyone I knew was buying things for the dance on Saturday, but I am not into fashion. I planned to wear a green striped shirt and a black pair of pants. I had no idea what Roni would wear. Although, I have an idea that Roni could care less if we match. At least I didn’t have to waste an afternoon trying to find just the right shirt like Ty did to match Maryanne’s dress.

I looked at my watch, and it was after one. I decided to head to the food court to get something to eat. I purchased a slice of pizza and a soda. I was eating and looking around when I noticed Amber and Jill on the other side of the court. I tried to hide my face because I didn’t want them to see me. I didn’t know if Blake had told them what happened. I was also embarrassed that they now know that I am gay. Unfortunately, after ordering their food, they spotted me as they walked around looking for a table.

“Hi, Seth,” smiled Amber as she approached the table. “Are you alone? Can Jill and I join you?”

I shrugged my shoulders and replied, “Sure, I guess.”

A worried look appeared on her face, and she asked, “You haven’t seen Blake today, have you?”

“No,” I replied, “Why?”

She answered, “He left the house this morning and didn’t tell anyone where he was going.”

“Maybe he had something to do,” I suggested.

Amber looked over at Jill with a worried look. She then turned back to me and asked, “Did something happen last night?”

“What?”

“When I went into Blake’s room last night when I got home, he seemed very upset,” she explained. “When I asked him how things went with you, he got mad. Then this morning, he was gone when I got up. Mom said he just left without saying anything.”

“That’s strange,” I said.

“Everyone is worried about him,” said Amber worriedly. “Jill and I came to the mall to see if he is here. You haven’t seen him, have you?”

“No,” I said. “Maybe he just needed to get away for a while.”

Amber sighed and looked at Jill again. “Should I tell him?” Jill looked over at me and nodded her head.

“Tell me what?” I asked.

“Blake has a lot of problems,” she said. “He’s living with me because his mom and dad put him out.”

I responded, “He told me that.”

“Well,” replied Amber, “he probably didn’t tell you everything.”

“What?”

“Blake runs away a lot,” she informed me. “He’s been doing it for a couple of years.”

“Where does he go?”

“No one knows,” she said. “He has these serious bouts of depression, and he will just disappear for several days. He did it a couple of weeks ago, and they found him on the street with pneumonia.”

“Is that why he was in the hospital?” Amber nodded her head.

“Blake told his parents two years ago that he is gay, and they turned against him. Every time he gets into an argument with them, he leaves home and is gone for several days. The cops have brought him home a few times. I guess this last time was the breaking point for his parents. Blake’s mother is my aunt. She called and begged my mother to take him in. If she didn’t, they were going to send him to some juvenile institution for runaway boys.”

“Damn,” I responded. I had no idea that Blake had been through so much. He told me about his parents, but I didn’t know the situation was this bad.

Amber asked worriedly, “So, what happened last night?”

“Nothing really,” I replied. I told them how we had been talking, and then suddenly his mood changed, and he got out of the car.

“That sounds like Blake,” she replied. “You probably didn’t do anything wrong. Blake’s got a lot of problems.”

“Where do you think he may be?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t have a clue. He’s never talked to me much. I know he’s gay, and that bothers him. His parents kicking him out of the house really fucked him up. I just hope he doesn’t hurt himself.”

“He wouldn’t do that, would he?” I asked worriedly.

“I don’t know what he’s capable of doing,” she replied as tears filled her eyes. “I’m just worried they are going to find him dead on the streets someday. He was really sick when they took him to the hospital recently. It’s like he’s given up, and he doesn’t care what happens to him.” She wiped tears from her eyes with a napkin.

She rose from her seat. “If you see him, tell him to call me, okay?” She and Jill turned and walked away.

“Shit,” I muttered to myself as a wiped a tear from my eye.

Thanks for reading. I hope you're enjoying Seth's chaos.