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Featured Story: His Story


Welcome to another Monday! Once again, the review team has a new story review to hopefully whet your appetite. If you do read, don't forget to leave a review!

His Story
Drew Payne

Reviewer: Parker Owens
Status: Complete
Word Count: 9,305

Life is hard enough being different. It’s harder still when that difference is accentuated, made stark in bold relief, by the church in which a boy is raised to become a man. Although this story is set in the U.K., it describes a kind of abuse and exile gay men and women will recognize throughout the world. It’s not a pretty tale.

His Story opens a window into Chris, a man in his twenties who grew up taking religion seriously. Through his point of view, we discover his emotional and psychological struggles with friendships, relationships, and self-image. A chance encounter at a Pride event becomes the impetus for a possible change. 

I was drawn to this story because it made no hearts-and-roses promises. It tackles issues that challenge people of faith, and does so without blinking or dissembling. Any of us who have been cast out from family, community and belief can connect to Chris and his experience. Readers will come away sickened by the ‘ex-gay’ Christianity movement and the damage such fundamentalism has done. Entire books have been written on this subject, yet Drew Payne teases out some central themes in six succinct, searing chapters.

While Payne paints a bleak picture in much of this story, the canvas is not without bright spots of hope. Chris finds a tight group of friends who will hold, support and encourage him. One of these helps him find honest therapy and real help for his trauma. That ray of sunshine gleams on the reader even as the story closes, knowing the pain Chris must yet endure.

I encourage you to read this story by a talented writer. Drew Payne is one more reason GA matters so much, as stories like these, hard as they are, make us reflect and act.

Category: Fiction  Genres: Drama  Tags: gay, dark, love, hate, suicide  Rating: Mature

  • Like 10
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21 Comments


Recommended Comments

northie

Posted

  On 8/10/2020 at 11:58 AM, Drew Payne said:

I wrote this story originally in the early 1990s.

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It feels as relevant now as then. Many queer people of faith (whichever faith) still experience rejection, exclusion, or persecution. 

  • Like 5
northie

Posted

  On 8/10/2020 at 6:00 PM, Drew Payne said:

Hope is what I wanted at the end of this story.

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I'm a great believer in open-ended stories - it's what most of mine end up being. It is enough to give readers a sense of where things might go next. That's even more the case with a series of vignettes, I think. A 'slice of life' is just that. 

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Desperado

Posted

This is a great feature.

I'm curious

  • Like 3
Drew Payne

Posted

  On 8/10/2020 at 6:12 PM, Mikiesboy said:

MichaelS is my husband.

I too was raised a Catholic, however, my views differ from Michael's and likely yours for a number of reasons. However, I'm not here to try and change your mind about God or religion. People will choose their own way.

Even though i no longer believe, I'll have a look at this story.

I don't believe all stories should be happy or end happily. I'm after the story, whatever it is, it is the story that matters.

i'll let you know what i think.. thanks, Drew.

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My believes are complicated. I'm basically an agnostic. That's what I tell people, and then have to explain what it is (!!).

I have huge problems with organised Christianity (The different denominations, and don't get me started on the mega-churches), I hate the corruption, dishonesty and the way they use people. That said, I know a lot of wonderful people with a faith and wonderful people with no faith. I am far more interested in the person than what religion they do or don't follow.

I am fascinated that you're married to another Michael, Michael and Michael are husbands. It is things like that fascinate me, especially as a writer. And I also think same-sex marriage is great because if finally gives LGBT people the same choices as straights.

  • Like 2
Drew Payne

Posted

  On 8/10/2020 at 6:19 PM, northie said:

I'm a great believer in open-ended stories - it's what most of mine end up being. It is enough to give readers a sense of where things might go next. That's even more the case with a series of vignettes, I think. A 'slice of life' is just that. 

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@northie, I couldn't agree more. Life doesn't have nice and neat endings, why should fiction have to have it? I've just written the final chapter for the first long-form read I have managed to finish, and I knew quite a few people won't be happy with it. It's a happy ending, well I think it is, but it’s an ending that moves the central character onto a new place, and that's where I leave it.

I'm looking at writing a collection of science fiction stories, with a linked theme, but the important thing in those stories, to me, will be writing about real human reactions. That's what I really enjoy writing about, real reactions and emotions, and trying to understand them.

  • Like 3
northie

Posted

  On 8/11/2020 at 9:40 PM, Drew Payne said:

and I knew quite a few people won't be happy with it.

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You write for you in essence and if you're happy with the ending, that's fine. There'd be room for argument if the ending was illogical, nonsensical, or plain ridiculous; otherwise, if some of your readers don't like it, tough. ;)  I'm not a HEA fan - can you tell?  :lol:

  • Like 2
Drew Payne

Posted

  On 8/11/2020 at 9:57 PM, northie said:

You write for you in essence and if you're happy with the ending, that's fine. There'd be room for argument if the ending was illogical, nonsensical, or plain ridiculous; otherwise, if some of your readers don't like it, tough. ;)  I'm not a HEA fan - can you tell?  :lol:

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A friend of mine runs a gay story email group. I posted several stories to it, none of them had happy endings because of the nature and themes of the stories. Suddenly other men were emailing and complaining to the group about a lack of happy endings in my writing, one said that a happy ending was the author "rewarding" their characters, another man demanded a happy ending because it was gay fiction. I just sat back and read all those emails. It was fascinating because no one talked about the characters and situations in my stories. They just demanded happy endings at all cost. It was fascinating. I learnt a lot from all those emails, but it was all about those men posting them. It didn't change my writing one degree.

I so agree, the ending must be appropriate for the story, it must be honest, and it must NEVER be contrived.

The nature of His Story cried out for a hopeful ending, an ending saying that there is a way out of this awful situation, but if I'd ended it with the narrator finding his soul-mate it would have been so dishonest because he had just begun his journey out of this mess, he was in no place to have a successful relationship.

  • Like 2
Mikiesboy

Posted

  On 8/11/2020 at 9:28 PM, Drew Payne said:

My believes are complicated. I'm basically an agnostic. That's what I tell people, and then have to explain what it is (!!).

I have huge problems with organised Christianity (The different denominations, and don't get me started on the mega-churches), I hate the corruption, dishonesty and the way they use people. That said, I know a lot of wonderful people with a faith and wonderful people with no faith. I am far more interested in the person than what religion they do or don't follow.

I am fascinated that you're married to another Michael, Michael and Michael are husbands. It is things like that fascinate me, especially as a writer. And I also think same-sex marriage is great because if finally gives LGBT people the same choices as straights.

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i am Mikiesboy... Michael's boy/husband .. my name is tim.  Don't worry happens often. If i'd even had an inkling i'd be here on GA for 5 years rather than 5 days i'd i have picked a different name to use. But here we are.  So, it's Michael and tim who are husbands.

I agree about religion. i do not believe there is a nice old god either. My Father in heaven (ha) ... he's pretty shit at the dad thing if there is.  Anyway my story is long and while i've posted some works about it, personally i cannot write it.  i've tried, but i had to live it and pay for it and it's not worth the trip back there. It left me with HIV, PTSD and severe depression/suicidal tendencies.

It also left me with Michael, who is my light and anchor in this world. i'm happy now for the most part. 

i, like you enjoy real stories, people. No matter where or who they are they must be real and believable. Even if they are fairies under the boardwalk, or near-humans, or even Halloween angels. Whatever i write, it needs to feel right and be believable.

  • Like 1
Drew Payne

Posted

  On 8/12/2020 at 11:32 AM, Mikiesboy said:

i am Mikiesboy... Michael's boy/husband .. my name is tim.  Don't worry happens often. If i'd even had an inkling i'd be here on GA for 5 years rather than 5 days i'd i have picked a different name to use. But here we are.  So, it's Michael and tim who are husbands.

I agree about religion. i do not believe there is a nice old god either. My Father in heaven (ha) ... he's pretty shit at the dad thing if there is.  Anyway my story is long and while i've posted some works about it, personally i cannot write it.  i've tried, but i had to live it and pay for it and it's not worth the trip back there. It left me with HIV, PTSD and severe depression/suicidal tendencies.

It also left me with Michael, who is my light and anchor in this world. i'm happy now for the most part. 

i, like you enjoy real stories, people. No matter where or who they are they must be real and believable. Even if they are fairies under the boardwalk, or near-humans, or even Halloween angels. Whatever i write, it needs to feel right and be believable.

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Oops, my mistake. I am still fascinated by that idea, two husbands with the same first name, I've just got to find the right story for them.

I use fiction to write about real things because it is easier, it is one step removed from me, or more, and therefore it isn't me. His Story is a good example of this. The narrator in it isn't me and his journey isn't mine, even though we both went through the same emotions because of the same source. Fiction gives me the chance to write about the things that are important to me, that I feel strongly about, without laying my emotional self bare. I couldn't write an autobiography, that is way too raw and unprotected for me. Though I admire people who can.

I am so sorry about what happened to you. Abuse is abuse is abuse, and its shit. But it makes me so angry that the Christian Church's default setting always seems to be to cover it up.

I am so glad you found Michael. I know several people who are very happy being single. I am not one of them. I was in a bad place when I met my husband, Martin, and he has made my life, and I am so grateful.

My favourite fantasy novel(s) is His Dark Materials trilogy, and even though it is full of fanciful things (I love the idea of having your own daemon) the people in it react with very human emotions. That's what I want to do with my writing.

  • Like 1
Mikiesboy

Posted

  On 8/12/2020 at 8:45 PM, Drew Payne said:

Oops, my mistake. I am still fascinated by that idea, two husbands with the same first name, I've just got to find the right story for them.

I use fiction to write about real things because it is easier, it is one step removed from me, or more, and therefore it isn't me. His Story is a good example of this. The narrator in it isn't me and his journey isn't mine, even though we both went through the same emotions because of the same source. Fiction gives me the chance to write about the things that are important to me, that I feel strongly about, without laying my emotional self bare. I couldn't write an autobiography, that is way too raw and unprotected for me. Though I admire people who can.

I am so sorry about what happened to you. Abuse is abuse is abuse, and its shit. But it makes me so angry that the Christian Church's default setting always seems to be to cover it up.

I am so glad you found Michael. I know several people who are very happy being single. I am not one of them. I was in a bad place when I met my husband, Martin, and he has made my life, and I am so grateful.

My favourite fantasy novel(s) is His Dark Materials trilogy, and even though it is full of fanciful things (I love the idea of having your own daemon) the people in it react with very human emotions. That's what I want to do with my writing.

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Then write it. You can. Currently I am writing a second story with Wayne Gray. We often discuss our other stories with each other. Bounce ideas off each other even though we won't be writing those together. It's helpful to get an idea or thought from someone else.

Fanciful things are fun to write about. Sometimes it makes somethings a little easier, but yes, as you say, you need to relate to the person/creature...and they are fun to bring to life. But they still need to live in their world and be relatable. I've written a few things like that and some real world stories too. But just do it, Drew... i've no doubt you can.

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Drew Payne

Posted

  On 8/12/2020 at 9:33 PM, Mikiesboy said:

Fanciful things are fun to write about. Sometimes it makes somethings a little easier, but yes, as you say, you need to relate to the person/creature...and they are fun to bring to life. But they still need to live in their world and be relatable. I've written a few things like that and some real world stories too. But just do it, Drew... i've no doubt you can.

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Tim,

I was in two-minds about starting the themed, sci-fi collection of stories, some of them will be on difficult and challenging subjects, but I'm going to start writing them, well I've started one of the stories already. I can use sci-fi to explore some of my favourite themes.

Happy writing and thanks for your encouragement.

  • Love 1
Mikiesboy

Posted

  On 8/14/2020 at 8:59 PM, Drew Payne said:

Tim,

I was in two-minds about starting the themed, sci-fi collection of stories, some of them will be on difficult and challenging subjects, but I'm going to start writing them, well I've started one of the stories already. I can use sci-fi to explore some of my favourite themes.

Happy writing and thanks for your encouragement.

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Look forward to seeing them, Drew!

  • Like 1

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