Starting this blog entry is a little rough for me. Tears are beginning to well up, my fingers don't know where to go, and my leftover hibachi is losing its heat rapidly. I was starting to recognize myself as an actual writer. Over the past several months, I've just been hammering away on my poor Chromebook's keys and my phone's touchscreen, just...going. Non-stop. Writing when I woke up, went on my breaks at work, when I got home, as I tried to sleep. I just kept writing. Just as I'm doing now, completely off the top of my head and straight into my fingertips.

Then this happened. I just wasn't paying attention, like at all! Love in the Shadows hit over 50,000 total views. 

I'm...honestly speechless. There are some serious self-reflections going on, and I'm having issues articulating my feelings. I'm happy, elated, proud...I think proud is the feeling. There have been few moments in my life where I had been proud of myself. And I need it to be understood that I do not give myself that luxury very often. 

Raised in a small town with very traditional views of the world's most sacred topics:  religion, politics, sexual orientation, personal orientation. These were situated in almost every conversation I was forced into as a young adult. Along with being a flop at sports (I played tennis, and only won two games, and they were by default because the opposing school didn't show up), there wasn't a single defining moment in my high school career. 

It wasn't until college when I was told that I didn't have to be held down by the shackles of a closed-minded community. I was told to be free, be who you want to be, be with who you want to be with, learn what you want, and run around on your own for once. I always knew I was gay, but I felt forced into a metal chained jail cell. Not a closet. I was originally told that I couldn't be who I am, that everyone in the entire world would label me a degenerate. Lowlife scum. Filth. 

But I am not that person anymore. That weak, tube-sock wearing, cargo short toting, buzz-cut owning little sniveling snot...he's dead. The new Aaron stepped up around my third year of college. I did something that no one in my high school ever saw coming. Both seriously, and hilariously, that excuse of a man climbed the rungs of fraternal politics and became the President. And did I wear that proverbial suit well. Conversing with high staff of the college about pressing issues across campus, collaborating with the Executive Council of my fraternal organization, and earning my spot in my college's Greek Hall of Fame. That...was the second moment of pride in my life. The first achieving the rank of Eagle Scout at the age of fifteen. 

So...my first ever post-education writing adventure has hit 50,000 views. This is something that some Youtubers would relish over. But I am actually writing a book. I'm writing a book! This feels so good to say out loud! I'm writing a freakin' book over here! And it is picking up steam, and I'm not done throwing coal in this train engine. Not by a long shot! And I have this community to thank. Just...thank you, all. For reading, writing, posting, editing, and being there to bring some entertainment into our world. I'm now a member of your team. The Gay Authors team. There are so many stories in my head that are going to be put on this website.

And I'll continue to make myself proud.