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MichaelS36

Entry posted by MichaelS36 in Relationships

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The other evening a friend said to me; "The hard times are when I think about my vows to my husband. And that helps. We all have troubles, but we can be the constant in the lives of those we love. There's something sublime and wonderful about that."

He's right, of course. Being there for others, a partner or friend, is a wonderful feeling.  Those vows we make when we marry are not just words to be said because 'that's what you do'.  No. They are and should be words held in the highest regard. Sacred? Maybe they should be. 

Too many people seem to easily forget them when times are hard, rather than do as my friend said. Hard times are when our vows are most important. They should be a comfort and a beacon. 

I read about couples forced now to be home with each other. Many are not doing very well. They argue and fight about everything it seems. The don't know how to compromise and share. What a shame that is.

But also, for many the opposite is true as well. 

It has been for tim and I. We talk more, laugh more. We can be quiet together, each of us doing our own thing. Being locked down together since March 2020 has been good for our relationship. 

Though, it hasn't been walk in the park. tim struggles with depression and that has hit hard sometimes during 'Covid'. But he has held on and worked through it. Taking time to care for himself.

If you're in a committed relationship and you made vows to each other and you find you are struggling, look back at that day, remember the look in your beloved's eyes and the words you said to them and they to you.  Say them again each day in your heart. Mean them. 

Relationships are work. The things we struggle for and work for offer the greatest reward. 

That love you share is worth it, everyday. 

 

 

Edited by MichaelS36

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Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,869

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i remember our vows. They are the ties that bind and i know we both meant them and still do. That i know that, have that ... beacon, often is all i have to hold onto when times are hard. xo

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MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,652

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2 minutes ago, Mikiesboy said:

i remember our vows. They are the ties that bind and i know we both meant them and still do. That i know that, have that ... beacon, often is all i have to hold onto when times are hard. xo

I couldn't have said them unless I was serious and meant them. I will be with you until the day I am no more. xo

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chris191070

chris191070 112,835

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I remember mine and Marks wedding day and our vows. They were what bound us together after 15 years together, we both meant them 5 years ago and we still mean them today.

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MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,652

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10 minutes ago, chris191070 said:

I remember mine and Marks wedding day and our vows. They were what bound us together after 15 years together, we both meant them 5 years ago and we still mean them today.

Thanks, Chris. That's wonderful to hear. 

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kbois

kbois 119,899

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I always enjoy your blogs because they make me think. You and tim are so fortunate to have found each other. 

I don't really remember too much of my vows. It's been over 28 years and I'm pretty sure we went with the standard 'Catholic Church' version. I do know that it hasn't been easy. We've been handed many challenges, most of which we weathered ok. 

Changes over time have tested our marriage. I'm not the same person I was when I was 24 and neither is my husband. In the past several years we've diverged on a few major things, religion being the most significant. 

Seeing how our vows were made "in the eyes of god" I'm having a hard time reconciling them with our life as it is now. 

I don't know what the future will bring but it will hopefully make me a better person. 

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Wayne Gray

Wayne Gray 41,735

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Thanks for this post, Mike.

I can't really contribute beyond what has already been said.

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MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,652

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38 minutes ago, kbois said:

I always enjoy your blogs because they make me think. You and tim are so fortunate to have found each other. 

I don't really remember too much of my vows. It's been over 28 years and I'm pretty sure we went with the standard 'Catholic Church' version. I do know that it hasn't been easy. We've been handed many challenges, most of which we weathered ok. 

Changes over time have tested our marriage. I'm not the same person I was when I was 24 and neither is my husband. In the past several years we've diverged on a few major things, religion being the most significant. 

Seeing how our vows were made "in the eyes of god" I'm having a hard time reconciling them with our life as it is now. 

I don't know what the future will bring but it will hopefully make me a better person. 

You already are a better person. Take stock of what you do daily and how you treat, and what you do for others. 

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MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,652

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2 minutes ago, Wayne Gray said:

Thanks for this post, Mike.

I can't really contribute beyond what has already been said.

Thanks for your contribution, since you were the person I was talking to. What you said made me think. I decided to write those thoughts down. 

I know how you feel about your man. It is a thing you can nearly hold in your hands. 

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Reader1810

Reader1810 52,129

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50 minutes ago, kbois said:

I always enjoy your blogs because they make me think.

I find it’s the same for me. Even if the circumstances may not be the same, but stopping and critically thinking - and understanding - is always a good thing. 

As for you @MichaelS36? You are a wise soul in my opinion, and I appreciate the wisdom you impart.

Nicely done, Mike. :) 

 

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mollyhousemouse

mollyhousemouse 52,068

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another great post, good things to think on and talk about Michael Sir

our wedding invitations said it all, "Today I marry my friend." we really enjoy each others company.

"sacred" is a good word to describe how we view our vows. we've been through things that have torn untold couples apart.

not that it's been all lollipops and unicorns, but i agree with what You said about relationships being work. but it's worth it to have what we have

 

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