Haha, okay so maybe not yet but with last night....

Well I'll start at the beginning. The beginning of yesterday, anyway. Yesterday was a Tuesday, my day off, so I had lots of free time and its also the day I do my best to find myself a date. During the day time I went out and took the Florida Criminal Justice Basic Abilities Test. While I was there I decided to go ahead and start the PASS process, which when complete will put me into the candidate pool for law enforcement agencies across all of Pinellas County (the county where I live) and I figured why not? My actual goal, though, is to get into the Hillsborough county sherrif's office. Hillsborough is on the otherside of Tampa bay and home to the city of Tampa, itself. The Hillsborough Sherriff's department offers to pay the way of trainees through the police academy and even pays them a wage on top of that... $17.63/hr. I have no doubt in my mind I would excel at the academy and graduate toward the top if not at the very top of my class. The academy lasts about six months and once through it there would be another month of on the job training and after that I would be a full Law Enforcement Deputy for the Hillsborough Sherrif's office - a position which comes with a $45,000/ year salary. Living as I am essentially in a state of poverty, you can imagine how much that job would mean to me.

In any case, after I got home from doing something productive with my life it was time to try to do something fun. So I logged into adam4adam and as usual I wasn't really expecting a whole lot but maybe get someone to come over watch a movie, do the deed and be on with it. There was a guy who I had noticed a couple times before, very cute and with a profile that matched what I was looking for on most of the important points... versatile in bed, doesn't smoke, drinks socially but not often, doesn't do drugs... and he looked like he radiates hotness. Well I had talked with him a couple times before and tonight I asked if he would like to come over. He agreed and I cooked a pizza, timing it to be ready for him to be here. When he arrived I had an immediate attraction to him. As we talked and got to know each other a little better, that attraction just got stronger. I can't remember all the details exactly but I do remember him mentioning that he has had to move around quite a lot and he's not entirely thrilled about that instability. Apparently he also had a very bad relationship with someone who was very abusive, and at this point he's not really looking for a relationship but I got the feeling from him that if he found someone worth having a relationship with, he wouldn't hesitate once he was sure of the guy. After pizza we headed out to get some movies and wandered through a hollywood video. We talked a lot and I picked out four of them for $20 since I've been trying to expand my dvd collection. I was amazed by just how attracted I was to him... not just in a sexual sense either. I wanted to come up and give him a big hug and cuddle him right there in the video store but I knew it was still too soon. As I thought about it I began to realize... this wasn't someone I could only see being friends with. This was someone I could see possibly being boyfriends with. Not just an occasional hookup, but I could possibly have a sincere relationship with him. I resolved at that point not to burn myself by moving too quickly. We got back to my place and I got it all set up, made some popcorn and turned out the lights, and we cuddled up and watched the movie together... after a while we started kissing and holy gawd is he ever a good kisser! Just about everything he did fell right in line with in line with what my body likes and the one thing he did which wasn't on my normal list of 'lets do this' ... well, I could get used to it if he's into that, haha.

The thing is... you have no idea how proud I was of myself and just what an accomplishment it was for me that we both kept our pants on. For a guy I was that attracted to, and who I really would like to have sex with... I decided I really would rather wait a few dates and get to know each other better so that when the time came it really would be an exchange not just of pleasure and fluid but also of emotion.

He ended up having to leave, even though I could tell he didn't really want to, because he had to be up to go to work today... and in a way I was a little relieved because that meant not having to worry anymore if I could continue to resist the temptation to take off all our clothes, haha. His personality fits what I'm looking for, if our cuddle and hump-through-clothes session is anything to judge by his sexual pallate is right up my alley, and he is just so damn cute and cuddlable! I so very much want to see him again and from the messages we exchanged this morning online I think he feels the same.

So yeah... i may not be ready to settle down with him just yet and we're definitely a ways off from that but I could see that possibility and I'm glad for it.

He mentioned wanting to go to the beach... I have a feeling that will be our next date