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Posted

It's a bit earlier than the normal time of week, but 83 is up.

 

84 should be along a week from Tuesday (8 days or so from now), getting us back on our weekly schedule. :ph34r:

Posted

It's a bit earlier than the normal time of week, but 83 is up.

 

84 should be along a week from Tuesday (8 days or so from now), getting us back on our weekly schedule. :ph34r:

 

I already reviewed this but I'll say it again...it was lovely!!! :hug: :hug: :wub: :wub: :wub:
Posted

It's a bit earlier than the normal time of week, but 83 is up.

 

84 should be along a week from Tuesday (8 days or so from now), getting us back on our weekly schedule. :ph34r:

 

B)............... I knew from the title of the chapter that this going to be about Shane and Trevor in-depth exploring their relationship further along. I wondered why Shane took the satellite phone along, I'm going to guess in the next chapter he is going to get a phone call while heading back to the zodiac from Officer Fowler. I do hope the breaking news does not cause Trevor another panic attack, seeing that he had another one near the cliffs, I realize now, he really does need the counseling soon in spite of the danger it could bring to him.

 

So Trevor has an Aunt, last known address somewhere in a inland town named Northam, Hmm, could this bring Trevor a step closer to his mother? Or will he even make it there?

 

Otherwise a nice chapter complete with cliffs!! 0:)

Posted

"Trevor’s voice trailed off, and he took a breath. “The reason I asked you about being bi is because I was scared, because I know I love you,” Trevor said, his voice shaking as he committed himself to Shane.

 

“I love you too, Trev, I have for a while now,” Shane said, before pulling Trevor close.

 

Their lips met, joining their hearts, already one."

Awwww. The love story we've all been patiently waiting for is now most definitely on! :hug:

 

The title could have been "Circumnavigation - or How Trevor Snags His Man" (but then it would be a spoiler heheheh!)

 

But we were too traumatised to enjoy this :devil:having just read:

 

"Trevor looked toward the looming edge, taking a few steps towards it. As he came close, blasted by the wind at the abyss’s edge, he crouched slightly, peering over from several yards further away than he’d been when they’d arrived. Mindful of Shane’s concern, Trevor turned away from the precipice, taking a single step back towards him. Trevor stumbled, feeling a chill that had nothing to do with the wind, coupled with the acrid taste of fear. For a moment, he was confused, for heights had never bothered him before. Then, he became at last aware of his racing pulse and labored breaths. Too late, he realized what was happening, as he took another faltering step towards Shane and, his balance gone, sank to one knee on the bare rock, as his eyes found Shane’s.

 

“Trev!” Shane yelled, at first suspecting a prank, but one glance at Trevor’s eyes left no room for doubt.

 

Lost at the edge of forever, Trevor fought his losing battle with his demons, awash in a panic pure and profound. The world swirled around him, the sensation of the battering wind, the hard, smooth rock, the roar of the sea so far below."

Now that is one evil piece of writing. Just evil. And gratuitous too (no plot relevance). I can see the goat licking his leathery lips with sadistic pleasure as the malignant idea popped into his bovid brain and he happily tapped away with his cloven hooves (how does he do that?) knowing he was scoring a double whammy - sending shockwaves of horror through readers' minds AND getting in a wicked cliff joke. Cruel. So cruel and so wicked.

Posted

Now that is one evil piece of writing. Just evil. And gratuitous too (no plot relevance). I can see the goat licking his leathery lips with sadistic pleasure as the malignant idea popped into his bovid brain and he happily tapped away with his cloven hooves (how does he do that?) knowing he was scoring a double whammy - sending shockwaves of horror through readers' minds AND getting in a wicked cliff joke. Cruel. So cruel and so wicked.

Ah, but there's no cliffhanger at the end of chapter 83! :P

 

:2hands: (<<-- I'm prepared for CJ's "Who, me? I never!" regarding cliffhangers.)

 

Colin B)

  • Site Moderator
Posted

Ah, but there's no cliffhanger at the end of chapter 83! :P

 

:2hands: (<<-- I'm prepared for CJ's "Who, me? I never!" regarding cliffhangers.)

 

Colin B)

 

Although this may be true for this chapter, it's still going to give him a swelled head when he reads that.
Posted

Congratulations CJ and thank you for en excellent chapter. It isn’t often that I have read such a multi-purpose chapter, which warms the readers hearts so nicely. All of us read your comments and predictions. You gracefully informed us the final two chapters are already written. Also the Epilogue is standing by to be posted. This chapter could well be a preamble for this closing episode. Many of your readers are waiting all atwitter, now that the final obstacle has been laid to rest. The final paragraph appears to forecast the two lovers will sail into the rising sun, joined together, forever Ahh Yes!

 

Alas in truth, this entire chapter does none of this. Skillfully you have actually created a monstrous Cliffhanger. Let me review where we were at on July 9th 2011. You posted the notice there would be a delay in the next installment. The last few words in the preceding episode said, “The news was out.”

 

Many of your readers are counting the days until, December 17th 2006, arrives in the story timeline. While they hang around, they are left wondering the outcome of the promised confrontation between Sergeant Gonzalez and Joel. Dirk and Jim will have learned Joel may very well be a primary suspect, instead of the rock Trevor can cling to when he learns the answers to the, “Disappearance.” The Dark Duo has probably learned which Carnarvon holds the solution of their problem. Greg Fowler most likely has contacted Martin Blake concerning the probable publicity awaiting him. In response to Joel’s suggestion, Lisa may be searching for information. What awaits her inquiring mind?

 

Yes, Oh Yes, these Cliffhangers and many others have been percolating all along. Were any of these critical matters addressed, Hell NO! They were not even mentioned. What was spoon-fed to us were the family trees of the Kookaburra’s crew. I can understand this information is of some importance. I however doubt it will be considered significant to the two of them, when they are Face to Face with Sanchez’s Designated Hitter.

 

CJ you should be ashamed to face your readers after posting, in my opinion, the most horrendous cliffhanger to date, Go back to your mountainous hideout and sin no more.

  • Like 1
Posted

While MartyS expresses the general frustration we all feel about waiting for key chunks of the story to fall in place, I like the chapter.

 

 

I'm pleased to see the boys fall in love and face their fears together. They may need that bond to get though the trials ahead. I'm glad the frustration and game playing is largely over between Shane and Trevor. Certainly now they can leave Shark's Bay and get Trevor's life under control.

 

Thanks.

Posted

Congratulations CJ and thank you for en excellent chapter. It isn’t often that I have read such a multi-purpose chapter, which warms the readers hearts so nicely. All of us read your comments and predictions. You gracefully informed us the final two chapters are already written. Also the Epilogue is standing by to be posted. This chapter could well be a preamble for this closing episode. Many of your readers are waiting all atwitter, now that the final obstacle has been laid to rest. The final paragraph appears to forecast the two lovers will sail into the rising sun, joined together, forever Ahh Yes!

 

Alas in truth, this entire chapter does none of this. Skillfully you have actually created a monstrous Cliffhanger. Let me review where we were at on July 9th 2011. You posted the notice there would be a delay in the next installment. The last few words in the preceding episode said, “The news was out.”

 

Many of your readers are counting the days until, December 17th 2006, arrives in the story timeline. While they hang around, they are left wondering the outcome of the promised confrontation between Sergeant Gonzalez and Joel. Dirk and Jim will have learned Joel may very well be a primary suspect, instead of the rock Trevor can cling to when he learns the answers to the, “Disappearance.” The Dark Duo has probably learned which Carnarvon holds the solution of their problem. Greg Fowler most likely has contacted Martin Blake concerning the probable publicity awaiting him. In response to Joel’s suggestion, Lisa may be searching for information. What awaits her inquiring mind?

 

Yes, Oh Yes, these Cliffhangers and many others have been percolating all along. Were any of these critical matters addressed, Hell NO! They were not even mentioned. What was spoon-fed to us were the family trees of the Kookaburra’s crew. I can understand this information is of some importance. I however doubt it will be considered significant to the two of them, when they are Face to Face with Sanchez’s Designated Hitter.

 

CJ you should be ashamed to face your readers after posting, in my opinion, the most horrendous cliffhanger to date, Go back to your mountainous hideout and sin no more.

 

 

B)................. Hahaha! Like I said earlier, I knew by the title it was all going to be about Trevor and Shane!

Posted

................. Hahaha! Like I said earlier, I knew by the title it was all going to be about Trevor and Shane!

Hi Benji,

 

Remember what the Goat said in his explaination about the delay. All three chapters had to be written before he posted Chapter 83. Are we looking forward to another couple of chapters of sightseeing and improving the relationhip of Trevor and Shane?

 

Marty

Posted

Hi Benji,

 

Remember what the Goat said in his explaination about the delay. All three chapters had to be written before he posted Chapter 83. Are we looking forward to another couple of chapters of sightseeing and improving the relationhip of Trevor and Shane?

 

Marty

 

B)................... Nah, I think in the next chapter there will be a phone call from Fowler announcing the 'news' as they both walk back to the zodiac. Within 12 hours it will be world wide, then we will back in Florida getting reactions from Dirk and everyone else. Of course the location of the town will no longer be secret, so Sanchez will act immediately.

Posted

I wondered why Shane took the satellite phone along, I'm going to guess in the next chapter he is going to get a phone call while heading back to the zodiac from Officer Fowler.

 

Surely he took the phone because they were going jogging in the middle of nowhere - if one of them twisted an ankle, it's a heck of a long way for the other to go for help whilst leaving the injured one in the desert. Taking the phone was just common sense.

 

That's not to say that they won't get a call informing them of the breaking news back home though I'd have thought it more likely to come from the Blakes. Does Fowler even know the number of the sat-phone on board?

 

Anyway, I liked the chapter - it's nice to see the boys' relationship developing. Some of my favourite bits of the tale so far have been the travelogue ones in the Mediterranean - just following them along on Google maps.

 

Actually, I'm slightly concerned at how Trevor's going to deal with setting sail again. How's he going to cope with being back out in the open ocean, albeit that this time he'll have Shane by him? It seems to me like a sure-fire recipe for another panic attack.

Posted

I already reviewed this but I'll say it again...it was lovely!!! :hug: :hug: :wub: :wub: :wub:

 

Thanks! :-)

 

B)............... I knew from the title of the chapter that this going to be about Shane and Trevor in-depth exploring their relationship further along. I wondered why Shane took the satellite phone along, I'm going to guess in the next chapter he is going to get a phone call while heading back to the zodiac from Officer Fowler. I do hope the breaking news does not cause Trevor another panic attack, seeing that he had another one near the cliffs, I realize now, he really does need the counseling soon in spite of the danger it could bring to him.

 

So Trevor has an Aunt, last known address somewhere in a inland town named Northam, Hmm, could this bring Trevor a step closer to his mother? Or will he even make it there?

 

Otherwise a nice chapter complete with cliffs!! 0:)

 

Things do seem pointing at Northam, don't they?

 

Hrmm, what was Shane almost right about, when they were approaching the beach.

 

Awwww. The love story we've all been patiently waiting for is now most definitely on! :hug:

 

The title could have been "Circumnavigation - or How Trevor Snags His Man" (but then it would be a spoiler heheheh!)

 

But we were too traumatised to enjoy this :devil:having just read:

 

Now that is one evil piece of writing. Just evil. And gratuitous too (no plot relevance). I can see the goat licking his leathery lips with sadistic pleasure as the malignant idea popped into his bovid brain and he happily tapped away with his cloven hooves (how does he do that?) knowing he was scoring a double whammy - sending shockwaves of horror through readers' minds AND getting in a wicked cliff joke. Cruel. So cruel and so wicked.

 

Zombie! Aww, they've corrupted you too! :blink:

 

That quote actually was plot relevant. :P What would have happened to Trevor had he not turned back, out of his concern for Shane's qualms? He'd have had his collapse right on the very edge...

 

And, to all who have ever accused me of cliffhangers, I can prove here, once and for all, that I always avoid them; if I'd ever been inclined to have a cliffhanger, here would have been the place. I could have just ended the chapter with Trevor collapsing at the cliff edge,slipping over, holding on to the crumbling edge by his fingertips as the panic attack weakened his grip, with Shane too overcome by fear of heights to be able to save him....

 

But I didn't. :P

 

Ah, but there's no cliffhanger at the end of chapter 83! :P

 

:2hands: (<<-- I'm prepared for CJ's "Who, me? I never!" regarding cliffhangers.)

 

Colin B)

 

Well, of course! I never use cliffhangers!

Although this may be true for this chapter, it's still going to give him a swelled head when he reads that.

 

True, that! :P

 

Congratulations CJ and thank you for en excellent chapter. It isn’t often that I have read such a multi-purpose chapter, which warms the readers hearts so nicely. All of us read your comments and predictions. You gracefully informed us the final two chapters are already written. Also the Epilogue is standing by to be posted. This chapter could well be a preamble for this closing episode. Many of your readers are waiting all atwitter, now that the final obstacle has been laid to rest. The final paragraph appears to forecast the two lovers will sail into the rising sun, joined together, forever Ahh Yes!

 

Alas in truth, this entire chapter does none of this. Skillfully you have actually created a monstrous Cliffhanger. Let me review where we were at on July 9th 2011. You posted the notice there would be a delay in the next installment. The last few words in the preceding episode said, “The news was out.”

 

Many of your readers are counting the days until, December 17th 2006, arrives in the story timeline. While they hang around, they are left wondering the outcome of the promised confrontation between Sergeant Gonzalez and Joel. Dirk and Jim will have learned Joel may very well be a primary suspect, instead of the rock Trevor can cling to when he learns the answers to the, “Disappearance.” The Dark Duo has probably learned which Carnarvon holds the solution of their problem. Greg Fowler most likely has contacted Martin Blake concerning the probable publicity awaiting him. In response to Joel’s suggestion, Lisa may be searching for information. What awaits her inquiring mind?

 

Yes, Oh Yes, these Cliffhangers and many others have been percolating all along. Were any of these critical matters addressed, Hell NO! They were not even mentioned. What was spoon-fed to us were the family trees of the Kookaburra’s crew. I can understand this information is of some importance. I however doubt it will be considered significant to the two of them, when they are Face to Face with Sanchez’s Designated Hitter.

 

CJ you should be ashamed to face your readers after posting, in my opinion, the most horrendous cliffhanger to date, Go back to your mountainous hideout and sin no more.

 

Marty! You know I never use cliffhangers.. And, yes, there is a hit out on Trevor, but he doesn't know it, so no worries. And that Garlic crusher did indeed stir up some things, but Trevor is as yet unawares of the happy news that it has been rescued from the southern ocean.

 

While MartyS expresses the general frustration we all feel about waiting for key chunks of the story to fall in place, I like the chapter.

 

 

I'm pleased to see the boys fall in love and face their fears together. They may need that bond to get though the trials ahead. I'm glad the frustration and game playing is largely over between Shane and Trevor. Certainly now they can leave Shark's Bay and get Trevor's life under control.

 

Thanks.

 

They have challenges ahead, 'tis true. And yep, one of the reasons this was all in one chapter was....er, hrmm, I can't say, as that would be a spoiler. :)

 

Surely he took the phone because they were going jogging in the middle of nowhere - if one of them twisted an ankle, it's a heck of a long way for the other to go for help whilst leaving the injured one in the desert. Taking the phone was just common sense.

 

That's not to say that they won't get a call informing them of the breaking news back home though I'd have thought it more likely to come from the Blakes. Does Fowler even know the number of the sat-phone on board?

 

Anyway, I liked the chapter - it's nice to see the boys' relationship developing. Some of my favourite bits of the tale so far have been the travelogue ones in the Mediterranean - just following them along on Google maps.

 

Actually, I'm slightly concerned at how Trevor's going to deal with setting sail again. How's he going to cope with being back out in the open ocean, albeit that this time he'll have Shane by him? It seems to me like a sure-fire recipe for another panic attack.

 

Boats are a bit like cars in a way... you get a lot more stress in heavy traffic and maneuvering in tight places than on a wide open road that you have all to yourself. The greatest danger to ships is land. Once Kookaburra is in deep open water, the going is easy most of the time. But., as we saw on the way into Rhys Lagoon, getting her there is far from easy, and she has to go out the same way. :)

 

I love the travelogues too... Those were fun to write.

 

And before I forget, the title of the next chapter is Taking Care of Business

Posted

Marty! You know I never use cliffhangers.. And, yes, there is a hit out on Trevor, but he doesn't know it, so no worries. And that Garlic crusher did indeed stir up some things, but Trevor is as yet unawares of the happy news that it has been rescued from the southern ocean.

Oh CJ,

 

How blatantly you attempt to twist the facts to gain your ends. You admit there is a contract out on Trevor. Yet you say because he is unaware of it, there is no cliffhanger. I was definitely under the impression that when Trevor planned with two Custom Officers, one boat owner and his crew and one owner of a repair facility to hoodwink the press, he was definitely fearful for his life. Are you now denying that Trevor is afraid someone is trying to kill him?

 

I look forward to watching you attempt to squirm out of this.

 

Marty

Posted

I have a feeling this is the calm before the storm...

 

All "sunshine and bunnies" (quote taken from Mass Effect game) in this chapter...Hellfire and destruction in the next?

Posted

I have a feeling this is the calm before the storm...

 

All "sunshine and bunnies" (quote taken from Mass Effect game) in this chapter...Hellfire and destruction in the next?

 

B)............... Well the title should give you a hint, 'Taking care of business' Sanchez needs to take care of business with Trevor, as does Gonzales with Joel. Frank needs to plant a bug. 0:)

Posted

Oh CJ,

 

How blatantly you attempt to twist the facts to gain your ends. You admit there is a contract out on Trevor. Yet you say because he is unaware of it, there is no cliffhanger. I was definitely under the impression that when Trevor planned with two Custom Officers, one boat owner and his crew and one owner of a repair facility to hoodwink the press, he was definitely fearful for his life. Are you now denying that Trevor is afraid someone is trying to kill him?

 

I look forward to watching you attempt to squirm out of this.

 

Marty

 

Well, yes, Trevor was indeed fearful for his life, due to the bomb and then the pirates, but... he's been told by Gonzalez that the threat (motive to kill him) probably no longer exists. So therefor, he's probably not so worried. And thus, the continuing price on his head is unknown to him, so he's not worried. :)

 

It's just like when he had the highly unstable bomb aboard in the Suez... He didn't know it at the time, so he wasn't worried. (and, as was also said here in the forum at the time, one highly unstable bomb does not a cliffhanger make).

 

I have a feeling this is the calm before the storm...

 

All "sunshine and bunnies" (quote taken from Mass Effect game) in this chapter...Hellfire and destruction in the next?

 

Of course not! Nothing bad ever happens in my stories... it's all sunshine and bunnies. 0:)

 

 

B)............... Well the title should give you a hint, 'Taking care of business' Sanchez needs to take care of business with Trevor, as does Gonzales with Joel. Frank needs to plant a bug. 0:)

 

Or it could be something quite innocuous... maybe Dirk sends someone in to reopen the Chandlery for business? 0:)

Posted

Well, yes, Trevor was indeed fearful for his life, due to the bomb and then the pirates, but... he's been told by Gonzalez that the threat (motive to kill him) probably no longer exists. So therefor, he's probably not so worried. And thus, the continuing price on his head is unknown to him, so he's not worried.

 

It's just like when he had the highly unstable bomb aboard in the Suez... He didn't know it at the time, so he wasn't worried. (and, as was also said here in the forum at the time, one highly unstable bomb does not a cliffhanger make).

CJ

 

You wiggle and you twist. Then you hope I will forget. I have but to wait and I will be proven correct. I will respond to this calumny after some research.

 

Marty

Posted (edited)

Of course not! Nothing bad ever happens in my stories... it's all sunshine and bunnies. 0:)

 

 

:blink:.............. A nuke going off in Australia was sunshine and bunnies???? :wacko: :wacko:

Or it could be something quite innocuous... maybe Dirk sends someone in to reopen the Chandlery for business? 0:)

 

B).............. Could be, but I think Dirk needs not to worry about doing job interviews right now! 0:)

 

Edited by Benji
  • Site Administrator
Posted (edited)

C James, on 20 July 2011 - 05:40 PM, said:

 

Of course not! Nothing bad ever happens in my stories... it's all sunshine and bunnies. 0:)

 

 

:blink:.............. A nuke going off in Australia was sunshine and bunnies???? :wacko: :wacko:

 

Or it could be something quite innocuous... maybe Dirk sends someone in to reopen the Chandlery for business? 0:)

B).............. Could be, but I think Dirk needs not to worry about doing job interviews right now! 0:)

 

Well, a nuclear blast kinda has a ginourmous flash much like how the sun explodes repeatedly to produce light and heat, so maybe the two could be equated as being sunshine. And yes, there were lots of bunnies in the Australian outback, cooked or vapourized bunnies, but there were some before the explosion.

 

And the job interview is a great idea, wonder what it would be like be interviewed by Dirk in drag :P

Edited by wildone
Posted

CJ

 

You wiggle and you twist. Then you hope I will forget. I have but to wait and I will be proven correct. I will respond to this calumny after some research.

 

Marty

 

I'm being misjudged...!! Honestly, it was said often, here in the forum, that one unstable bomb aboard does not a cliffhanger make. :ph34r:

 

Of course not! Nothing bad ever happens in my stories... it's all sunshine and bunnies. 0:)

 

 

:blink:.............. A nuke going off in Australia was sunshine and bunnies???? :wacko: :wacko:

 

Wildone says it best below.. he read my mind! :blink:

 

Well, a nuclear blast kinda has a ginourmous flash much like how the sun explodes repeatedly to produce light and heat, so maybe the two could be equated as being sunshine. And yes, there were lots of bunnies in the Australian outback, cooked or vapourized bunnies, but there were some before the explosion.

 

And the job interview is a great idea, wonder what it would be like be interviewed by Dirk in drag :P

 

Yes indeed! The sun is, after all, a giant nuclear reactor, and a nuclear reaction is also what creates a nuclear blast.. now, the sun is fusion based, but there was a bit of fusion boosting used to pump up the yield on the Toowoomba device. So, that's sunshine!

 

And yep, you got the bunnies part right too! I'm glad to see you're coming around and seeing things as they are. :boy::read:

Posted

I'm being misjudged...!! Honestly, it was said often, here in the forum, that one unstable bomb aboard does not a cliffhanger make. :ph34r:

 

 

 

Wildone says it best below.. he read my mind! :blink:

 

 

 

Yes indeed! The sun is, after all, a giant nuclear reactor, and a nuclear reaction is also what creates a nuclear blast.. now, the sun is fusion based, but there was a bit of fusion boosting used to pump up the yield on the Toowoomba device. So, that's sunshine!

 

And yep, you got the bunnies part right too! I'm glad to see you're coming around and seeing things as they are. :boy::read:

 

 

B)................ :blink: Wildone has found the dark side!!

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