viv

So hey there... I have a funny story! At work on tuesday I had to write this proposal and after I spent two hours researching and answering all the questions and writing it, I took it to my boss for approval. He started reading it and said, "This is a little over the top. Have you ever thought about quitting and becoming a writer?" So I giggled and said, "Yeah, actually I have!" But I'll probably never be that brave ,plus I seem to be a glutton for punishment. Still dealing with some family crap, but hey, things will work out... they always do, and besides... I can always crash at Davey's place I have three days off this week which is like... unheard of so... woohoo! I'm officially hooked on playing this online scrabble! Sooooooooooooo fun! So I started a new story, and I'm 4 pages into it now, and really excited about how it's coming along. I can't wait to see how it turns out. God bless whoever invented pizza! What? I'm just saying... So I'm really excited about all this stuff going on here at GA... the scavenger hunt, and the newsletter, and the new Hosted Author Live Chats. The first one will be this Saturday, the 23rd, at 7 pm... PST with... ME! Yeah I know, I talk alot anyway, so much that they had to schedule me a whole chat right? Nah, seriously, come out and say hi and we'll... chat of course, about my stories or whatever, and get to know each other! Should be fun! Here in the Live Chat in a subroom called Viv. Hope everyone has a great weekend! Hugs, Viv P.S. I forgot! Chapter 22 of FBTE is up!! Finally!

Okay so I'll go ahead and give you all fair warning now... I have had a crap week and this will probably be a crap blog... you know, Viv, whining and complaining, only in the end to realize she's being dumb and ungrateful... so if you choose to stay and read... I won't be held responsible So let's see... We'll start with Thursday... My daughter turned 11 Happy Birthday Punkin! I suggested to Rich that since we aren't having the kids birthday parties for a few weeks still, that we take them each, on their birthday, and do something fun as a family. I asked him what he wanted to take her to do, he said... very nicely, giving, adult-like and several times... that it was her birthday and to let her choose... so I did... she chose roller skating which is fine with me, I love to roller skate... Rich, not so much, but we go... blah blah, turned out badly, and I was pissed at him and she ended up feeling guilty and sad because he wasn't having fun... I had to work like crazy all weekend, Friday night till 11 pm, back Saturday at 9 am till 6 pm, where my boss said I could leave when he did and then promptly left my ass behind at 5 when he left... Sunday all day 2 to 11 pm. At work Saturday, I spent all day putting together some spreadsheet, analyzing all the information from all the accidents in the store so my boss could email it to his boss, my boss, and his boss' boss.. or whatever, and we were the first store done and WAY early so he's looking pretty good cause he says I kick ass. Monday was my sons' birthday! We went to sign the refinance papers with my sister... that is an hour and a half of my life I'll never get back, but I swear it's worth it if she gets the hell out of my house! When I picked my son up from Kindergarten he had this birthday crown on and then he wore it ALL night! To the lender to sign the papers, to the restaurant for dinner, he wanted salad and they sang to him loudly! You know when they get to the part of the song where they say, "happy birthday dear..." and your name goes here... well they used a nickname for his name, one we never use, so after they all left he turned and asked me if that was his name, and I told him it could be if he wanted, and he said no, how about... insert other nickname I call him that Rich hates. I worked Tuesday.. lame meeting... then Tuesday night we are sitting in Mc'Donalds and my friend calls me to ask me how she knows if her water broke?? And I was thinking... cause the first 3 kids you had weren't enough of an indication :wacko: but whatever, so I go outside to have this conversation, thinking that not everyone eating probably wants to hear it, and tell her yes, that's what happened and to call her doctor. She says she did and they aren't answering so I tell her to call the ER and she does and a half hour later I get a call from her asking if she can drop her kids off for the night at my house so she can go have a baby... so of course I say yes. She has a girl my daughter's age, another daughter, age 7, and a son age 3... never been away from home before... but we handle it and it goes fine So Wednesday morning... I have 7 people to get 4 different places by 8 am with 5 seatbelts... logistical problem, I'd say... but I press on... I get up at 5:30 am and shower with Rich and we put my son and her little guy in the car and drop him at preschool at 6:30 am when it opens, poor guy was the only kid there then I take Rich to work and drop him off an hour early, so I can carpool lane back home with my son to pick up the 3 girls and drop the 4 of them at school by 7:30 to have breakfast and get myself to work by 8 for my lame ass conference call. Ugh! Exhausted yet? Then I got into an argument with Rich... lame and SO over him acting like that... whatever~ Then yesterday... I talked to Davey some... and Hugs for my darlin and all of you! Then I got my palm read with Eric and it was crazy accurate, and I went to work till midnight and then on my way home... I am less than a mile from my house, I am supposed to get off on the next exit.. and they have it closed and are moving everyone down to one lane of traffic, so I have to go passed my exit and home to the next exit and get back on the freeway going the opposite direction to get home at 12:30 am So I wake up a little late this morning since I got to bed so late... and I am rushing to get the kids to school in time and it's light blue shirt day, etc... and so I just throw on some jammies and go. After I drop the kids off, I noticed a policeman sitting right by the school, and I knew... anyway, I get pulled over and get a fix-it ticket for my registration being overdue... in my jammies... so I get back home and pick up Rich and drive him to work. So he sees the ticket, and me being the smart ass I am, and him being so... paranoid about how I drive even though I did some crazy dukes of hazard driving the other day when some lady tried to kill us and saved us... so anyway he sees the ticket and asks, "What's that for?" and I say, "For speeding in a school zone and not coming to a complete stop and driving through a crosswalk while there were kids in it..." and his comment was... "Did he say anything about the registration?" Way to ruin my moment! Anyway so I drop him off this morning and as he is getting out of the car he asks me, "Did you hit someone?" So, I say,"NO!!!" and he says, "Well, someone hit you then..." cause there is white paint and a mark on my car, probably from some dumbass who doesn't know how to drive or park... in California, that is REALLY shocking! SO anyway... the upshot of it all is... There is a new baby in the world, so welcome to it sister! At least I'm not in jail for overdue registration in my jammies, and I'm not off till Sunday... but I have lots of, people that love me and that I love back and I'm gonna try and quit whining now and smile some... Congratulations to my angel! Newest shared hosted author... Dezlboi!! You deserve it hun! Davey... I wish I was there with ya, all of you! Joey...I'm sorry about.. .the lameness... and we need MORE time! Cause I miss ya! Natey... It's gonna be fine so stop worrying and breathe and smile before... I come over there and make you ride shotgun to pick him up! Hugs everyone, Viv PS. The chapter is almost done finally! SO it's coming soon! Thanks for your patience!!

Happy Birthday! I miss ya hun! Hugs, Vivian

Happy Birthday Conner~ Hope you have a great day hun! Hugs, Viv

I'm so excited... and I don't even get to play! Good luck everyone! Kick some butt and all that... cause we have our pencils out and ready to write you one heck of a prize winning story! Seriously can't wait! Viv

The answer to that, my friends, is... a) I'm a grown up b ) I'm a mom c) I'm a wife d) I'm a control freak e) All of the above... If you guessed 'e' folks... you would be correct. :wacko: But in bigger and better news... It's my baby's birthday today! So that means that eleven years ago today... I was having my first baby and... trying not to die, almost literally... But, she's eleven today, obviously, and as much as I whine about her attitude and her... normal young girl behavior, she is a wonderful, good hearted, kind, smart, giving, very beautiful girl and so... Happy Birthday Punkin'... So let's see here... I have had one hell of a few weeks since I last posted.. and I won't get into it all here, but I do have to say a few things and then I have a couple funny stories to tell, and then I'll shut up So to Davey... I don't even know what to say really.. Everytime I feel like we can't get any closer than we are, except maybe geographically, which would be... amazing, we find a way to, even if we did it in some f**ked up- ass backward way this time... I love you Sweetie, and thanks for holding my hand and making me smile and listening and calling and talking to Rich and... just everything! Angel... Okay so it's safe to say that I officially miss ya. Even if all we are doing is whining to each other, somehow.. I love it. Call me crazy... since you probably already do but I love just hanging out with you and laughing... and the no pressure, and tons of support thing we have happening That and trash talkin Rich's car. Eric... Go kick some ass! Hug Billy and smooches for Josh and Joe gets special love, of course! Thanks for getting freaky with me all the time and for being your beautiful self always. Natey, Joey, Ronnie... Welcome back to school! You all are amazing brains.. so I'm sure it'll be a piece of cake and you'll have lots of time to... boy watch... Tobi... I miss you and I hope you are having a great time in England and maybe... Hugs! Petey... I hug you almost every day, but I like to hug so... that's just fine with me! Welcome back to work Okay so now for the funny stories... I had to work on Monday, which was Labor Day here in America, and there is this little old lady that always comes into my store to shop and comes through my line. You know the type, with her white hair and her little hat that matches her purse and her shoes with her southern accent. So she walks up and I say, "Hi, how are you today?" She says, "Oh, fine thanks, how are you?" I say, "I'm good, thank you. Did you find everything alright?" and she says, "Why yes, I did." Then out of the blue she asks, " Are you married?" so I reply, "Yes, I am... Why?" and she says... "Well, because you are always so nice and so sweet and such a pretty, pretty girl... I was gonna invite you home to meet my son." So I laugh cause... is she for real? AND does her son know his mom is out picking up women for him!? So then at the end of the conversation she tells me she is 83... so at best the son must be almost 50! So yeah, I have a hot date waiting in the wings or something. The next story is... We were in the car on our way to have some dinner and go to... COSTCO.. gasp! and the freeway on ramp near my house has a traffic signal there and as I approached it, the signal turned red so of course, being the law abiding, safe driver that I am... I stop. So this chick behind me honks at me... ME!!! So I say, and of course only the people in my car can hear me and not the one person I am actually talking to, but whatever, "Don't f**king honk at me for stopping like I am supposed to!" So anyway, I wait till it's safe and go right onto the on ramp and then I hear the kids... and my daughter is saying, "OOOOh!!! Daddy stuck up the middle finger at her!" so I am stifling my giggle totally at how they don't seem at all upset that I just said f**k and GASP!!! RICHARD!! How could you?! Then we get to this new Thai BBQ place we have never been to before and we go in and Rich is a pretty picky eater, but even he's cool with the selection, but my daughter is in tears. So I'm like... what is your deal? And she is crying because they have duck on the menu and EVERYTHING is made with oyster sauce and she hates fish! Now she isn't going to get to eat any dinner... MASSIVE EYE ROLL!!! So we explain to her that's usually how most asian foods are prepared and she just never knew it before and she only sort of believes us but we eat anyway and of course she lived through it and didn't starve and didn't have to eat a duck... I actually got some writing done, and some editing too... I suppose... I should start on my anthology entry eh? Oh and... the scavenger hunt... Play! Have fun! The prize is awesome you guys so.. seriously, go for it! The prize will be a one of a kind, and all yours, IF.. you play and if you win! Okay so Davey just kicked my ass in scrabble! That won't be happening again! Giggle! Hugs to everyone, Happy Birthday to Drew... Viv PS. Vance, you're sweet, and I miss my Kevin, and Foxy, I hope... you survived and to Snowy... I'm smiling if you are!

OMG! I can't believe you discussed your feelings on 83 before you even told me! What is this world coming to? Actually, so YAY and I'm glad you posted something hun... And onto 83... Holy smokes Com! Thanks for giving me my weekly fix... Wonderful as always love! Hugs and kisses, Vivian

Happy Birthday Robert! Hope you have a great day and a wonderful year! Hugs, Viv

Okay so, I don't know how many of you are like me... and I'll admit right now I was crying before this was half over, but it is an amazng, inspirational, loving, video... and Rich gave me the link! But seriously, watch this... http://www.break.com/index/a_fathers_love.html

OOOOHH! Prizes?! I wanna play! Yay! I love this kind of stuff! And.. you better tell.. Davey's mum is no one I would want on my bad side

Hey Sweetheart! Happy Birthday hun! Great big hugs for ya and have some fun today! Viv

Hey Cutie, Hope you have a great birthday and a wonderful year. Happy 17th! Hugs, Viv

Joey... Love ya, Vivian

Well... look who's all big and hosted now CONGRATULATIONS Sweetie! You did this, so smile and enjoy and be proud! Hugs! Viv

Happy Birthday Xandra! Hugs and smiles! Viv

I'm with Kitty on this west coast thing but... Happy Birthday Foxy! I hope this year brings you everything you wish for and more! Thanks you for being the man you are every day! Love Ya, Viv

Kevin... Whether we have been friends for quite some time or are just starting out, we all wanted you to know just how special you are to us and how much we recognize how lucky we are to have you in our lives. You offer us support and smiles and give so much and this is something we thought we could give back to you... We hope you have as much fun reading it as we had writing it! http://viv.gayauthors.org/spacecity.html Happy Birthday Kevin! Love ya, Vance, Viv, Ben, Eric, Dave, and Robbee PS. Thanks Joey for getting out of bed to do this for us!

Okay so... ::sigh:: I think I can't think of a sweeter way to spend a Saturday afternoon than laying all cozy on your soft bed with the boy of your dreams and being able to tell him you love him and touch him in a way that is so innocent, and yet, conveys so much and is so fulfilling at the very same time. As for the parental manipulations... we've all done it and we all have to deal with the guilt that comes with it, but... c'mon! This is Brandon we're talking about here... and love Thanks Com! Love Billy!! and you lots too!

Okay so for the real 100 baby! So I asked for some questions or little comments or blurbs or whatever any of you wanted to contribute and here

Okay so on the agenda for this 99th blog... One cute as hell story! One request from me to my friends. Kevin - Bardeara's nickname. Benny taught me something new! ... and stuff So this blog begins one day driving down the freeway for the ninety-millionth time today with my son in the back seat and he says to me, "I love you Mom." So I reply, "I love you too!" To which he replies, "I love you three," and before you know it I am saying, "I love you one hundred!" So, the next afternoon, which was today when I picked him up from kindergarten, his teacher came over to tell me she was so impressed that he could already count to one hundred, since to pass kindergarten at the end of the school year the kids only have to be able to count to thirty. So I smile like the proud mommy I am, and then she tells me he needs to practice cutting with scissors though Nevermind he is WAY proificient with numbers, but let's just let him run around with scissors :wacko: Okay so since this is my 99th blog... I would like to ask anyone interested, to submit a question, something you want to know about me but don't or are afraid to ask... or if you are a good friend of mine and would like to write a little blurb about me that I can put in my 100th blog I would really appreciate it! You can leave questions here as replies or PM me with them and if you want to remain anonymous, I'm totally cool with that! So thanks in advance! Okay Kevin - Bardeara officially has a nickname, and will hereafter be known as BABE! Now there is a whole explanation as to why I picked this name, even if he really is a babe but I'll let him explain that if he so chooses. So today I was chatting with Benny and Vance... pretty boy and I had soooooooooooo much fun cause Benny taught Vance and I how to make those paper dolls that are all attached and holding hands and I was SO proud that I did it! I was actually clapping and giggling and laughing out loud And Vancey... I am NOT the teacher's pet that would be... Murphy! Umm in other news.. SO proud of my angel for finally believeing in himself Apparently it means more when he hears how good he is from all you cute boys than from me But, nevertheless, that doesn't change the fact that he is, in fact, GOOD!, Really good, great even, verging on... fantastic. Sweetie... I love you and your SUPERB smile and that amazing laugh you have, and I am waiting for it! I'm SLOWLY getting chapter 22 written and I signed up for the fall anthology too. I have a friend of mine who is writing a story and who I'm sure would appreciate some feedback if anyone is interested... I will warn you that English isn't his first language, but he does quite well! Anyway, here is the link... http://library.gaycafe.com/nifty/gay/highs...dangerous-love/ Anyway... I'm exhausted! This taxi driving and up at 6:30 am and not in bed till 1 am thing is getting old real quick! But it's only temporary, by September, it should be over and I should have a new car! Vivian does a happy dance! Hugs guys... don't forget to send a question or comment for the 100th blog! Vivian PS. Natey and Ronnie... the pep talking begins now! Congrats to Zac and Joey sitting in a tree Tobi! I miss you and Petey... I officially have another member to add to our growing fanclub

I don't know if there is a 'blog anniversary' but if there is... Happy 1 Year Anniversary to... me One year ago today, I wrote and posted my first blog and since then... 97 blogs later I've found it to be an outlet, a fun way to communicate, a great way to discuss things, to tell stories, and to get feedback from people about all kinds of things... so I want to say thanks to everyone who has taken the time to ever read, write, respond, mention, etc... to me about it because I really appreciate it and more than that, I enjoy it, you all make me smile and laugh and love and it's amazing! Well, I am feeling some better, and SOOOOOOOOOOO many thanks to all of you who left me 'get well' messages and run by hugs and kisses! I'm not 100% yet, but I'm getting better and I guess I can't complain about that right? So my little guy started Kindergarten on Wednesday and... OMG!!! He is too cute! The kids are all so tiny and looking so cute with their backpacks on. It's kind of funny cause it's like you just know that if you even put anything in that backpack they are just gonna flop over backwards cause it's just too heavy for these little guys to carry. Our kids get to eat breakfast at school, so on the first day we took them to school and I had my daughter, who is a big 6th grader this year, help her baby brother and watched as he carefully juggled his breakfast and paid for it and carried it to the table and then we watched as she helped him get situated and then after they were finished eating they walked out of the cafeteria and she waved goodbye to us and ran off to look for her friends, cause who needs us right? She's a big girl now and we're boring so... We walked the little guy to his classroom and he hung his backpack on his hook outside and then we went to his red chair at the red table and he was coloring... Rich is asking me if I'm gonna cry, he sort of has this tactic he uses, I have figured out... See, he asks me before it happens in hopes to ward off the tears so he doesn't have to deal with it. He does it in movies, in emotional situations, etc... Anyway, so I honestly tell him that if my son cries, I will, but if he doesn't, I'll be fine. He didn't, I didn't, it was cool So we left him there coloring and when I went to pick him up on the first day it was too cute watching him walk in line and I don't think he realized it was time to go home because he wasn't even looking for me, and when I did finally get to him and asked him how his day was, he said, "Good." I asked him the standard questions... What was your favorite part? The slide! He went down! Did you make a lot of friends? Yes! What are their names? I don't know. So on day two, we just dropped the two of them off and this time when I went to pick him up, he was looking for me and when he saw me he ran over and I had to send him back to the line and wait for his teacher to dismiss him. So then once she did, I asked him how his day was and he said, "COOL!" and then proceeded to ask me like five times how my day was... like he's worried I'll be bored at home without him! So again he had fun and again he made lots of friends and again I asked their names and he said, "I told you! Lots!" Anyway, besides that it is totally cute and he is having so much fun and that he is so excited to be back at school, it's really sweet, and I think my favorite part... she says selfishly... is when I see his little head looking around for me and the smile I see when he finds me waiting for him, and the super tight squeezer hugs he gives me when he runs over! So in honor of the one year deal... and just cause I need to organize my thoughts and make some decisions... here is a list of all nicknames and their owners... Davey - Sweetie, Captain, Little bro Chris - Darlin' Eric - Beautiful Jeff - Angel Kevin AFF - Foxy Benny - Gorgeous Drew - Sweetheart Joey - The Man Natey - Naters, Dimples Petey - Cutie Tobi - Sunshine Kevin Bard - Kev... but... I need to think of something better! Maybe... Kitten?? Ronnie - Hun Vance - Peanut Butter for now, but I will think of something more appropriate soon! Did I miss anyone? I'm sure I did... the sneezing is making it hard to concentrate so I guess I should apologize if none of this makes any sense... In other news... I actually have been writing and making some progress so hopefully I'll have a new chapter for all of you who have been so patiently waiting and or politely nudging me pretty soon. And yes, I do plan on continuing Days of Silence so the uproar can be put to rest! It will be from Lucas' POV though, and it will be called A Time for Truth. Coming soon also To the several of you who I know who are out there writing stuff and I have taken a look at it... Keep it up! PLEASE!! You guys are doing great and I can't wait to see more! And... I'm happy to do anything I can to help so c'mon okay! Hugs and kisses, Vivian the one year blogger PS. Vance, you are so sweet and so nice and fun and I'm so glad we managed to get 'introduced'

Jules! Happy 18th Birthday hun! Hope it's a great one!

So we'll try it again... although maybe it's cause I am SO damn sick I have no patience to concentrate on anything except stopping my head from exploding Called the DMV :wacko: and it seems that even though they tell us to wait 6 weeks before even attempting to talk to a human, it seems they have known since week 2 that I never got my new liscence and so now I have an appointment there today at 3:45 to tell them to resend it to me since I never got it, although they already f**king know that and in case you were wondering, like I know you are... the answer is no. NO, I cannot get the real live human on the phone with me to do that and yes... yes, I actually have to go there to tell them something they already know! Three stores later... no Lightning McQueen backpacks ANYWHERE so now we have Spiderman... whatever, he's cool about it so that's fine. I got a new tire... but it took 2 freaking hours!! Holy crap! I could have changed it faster! I am taking the little guy to get a haircut today and then after lunch the school is having an ice cream social today as sort of a get-to-know your teacher and classmates thing so I guess I'll have to go be 'social' while feeling like total crap Rich is being SO sweet! Taking care of me and cuddling me and medicating me and bringing me tissue and cuddling me and he keeps asking, "Are you gonna be okay?" I think... he's worried about running out of clean undies... So while I was out, I bought my daughter some more bras... but this time they look like real ones and when I picked up Rich I said... 34A and he was like huh? and then.. he was like... Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ack! and don't tell me! Hehehehe Tony is leaving to go back to school in a about 2 weeks... I'll miss him, even if my house is total chaos when he's home and I hear "Mooooooooooooooom! Tony......" way too much I called in sick yesterday... which I never did until recently... but I really am sick so... and I LOVE my boss! Randy: Thank you for calling... 'store I work in' Me: Hey, it's Vivian. Randy: Hey Viv Me: It's sick Viv 'groan' Randy: NO! You have to work, you aren't allowed to be sick! Me: I know! It's in the Mom manual right? Randy: Yeah! Kay well, feel better... Me: I'm sorry! Randy: Nope! Just get better! *Reminds herself to return the videos to Blockbuster today* Kay I'm going.. I have a hot Scotsman waiting for my attention Love... Sick Viv PS. Angel where is that cute ass of yours?

Quick style blogging today I'm sick I just got a flat tire on the freeway on my way home from taking Rich to work at 8 am in my pajamas with both kids in the car and Tony came to rescue me I have to go get a new tire now... adds that to huge and still growing list of crap to get done today :wacko: Also have to call the DMV to find out why I STILL don't have my new drivers lisence after I renewed it online over 6 weeks ago My son starts Kindergarten on Wednesday and we HAVE to go find him a Lightning McQueen backpack today and then when we find it, I HAVE to say yes he can have it... those are his instructions He is all excited and they are having a little ice cream party on Tuesday so the kids can meet some of their classmates and their teacher... awwwwwww, my baby is... still a baby, but growing up! I have to go turn in the registration packet for him now that we have survived the evil doctor visit and the vaccines I NEED to get my new car like yesterday damnit! I was up till 3:45 in the morning trying to explain to Rich why I can't/don't want to tell him that I ever feel jealous/envious because that is like me giving away the control I have over the situation and worse, it validates him feeling/acting like that to me and he and I both know that he is an over acheiver in that category. Vivian does not like not being in control... and apparently does like referring to herself in the third person Tony finally shaved and you can actually see how totally cute he is, and... he is finally 'hanging out' with this girl I work with that I have thought would be great for him for a few years now! I listened to the same semi-depressing song all night Saturday night... Home by Michael Buble... I heard it in the movie The Wedding Date and by the way, I think I have a HUGE crush on Dermot Mulroney... not cause I think he is super hot, although he does have a certain sexiness to him and that deep rumbly voice and great smile... but more because every character he plays is so God damned amazing and smooth! In the movie he says these two lines and I was all... SWOON and Rich was like but I don't care... In one scene she is telling him how she feels stupid cause she knows nothing about him and he knows all this personal stuff about her and he says to her, "I hate anchovies, I have a degree from Brown University, and I think I'd miss you even if I had never met you." Did I say swoon? Cause it gets better...! Later on after the big dramatic fight... he goes to find her and says, "I realized I would rather fight with you than make love with anyone else." Okay I guess I need to go get ready and showered since it seems I have a hot date with a tire repair guy and a backpack... whoopee! Hugs, Sore throat and sniffly Vivian

I can't argue with you about this... for a lot of reasons, and I don't really want to either, but I do want to say a few things... You did have his forever, even if it was entirely too short for you and you were robbed of something so important and necesary for your life. Maybe... he felt you holding his hand... I know my mom did... in one moment of clarity when she was just concious enough to ask me if I was taking care of her baby, and as soon as I did, she was gone. This sucks... I'm gonna hug you now... Vivian