Zolia Lily

Totally totally totally! it's one of the (many and varied) reasons i can't post work a chapter at a time as i write. I have to write. Re read. Edit. Re read. Re edit. Maybe add a chapter. Re edit. Re read... start to post the first parts.... re read the next parts, re edit... freak out and panic and re edit and then wish i hadn't started posting yet.... but i think always looking at it as having room to grow and room to learn still is a good thing

Sometimes i wonder if everyone feels that way but no one says anything about it, and you end up with a whole society of people pretending they're all grown up when really they don't feel like it...

You know that stage when you're a teenager, and your body suddenly grows a lot, and then it feels too big and you trip over things alot? I stopped growing a while back... and i still feel like that. I figure i'm not going to grow out of that by now. I'm just going to accept it and LIVE disgracefully

totally agree with both KingdombytheSea and J.Ross. But i actually purposefully leave things aside for a while and come back to them, then i see what i don't like anymore, re edit, re write what i need to, add more in... try to make it more emotionally gripping, and just plain MORE than it was the first time around. Just better, actually. Hopefully it works.

lol i totally see either one of those really fast spanish ones or an irish jig. I know it's not a violin, but i totally can't help it

Ok, to think i was going to skip this whole awkward first hello business.... (which is why it's taken me so long to get here....) and now i've seen all the emoticons (especially :2hands: and !!! BEST!) i simply couldn't resist. Literally couldn't resist. Love this site, btw Oh. And i'm Lily. And i'm friendly. Promise over and out. (aaaaand right here i'd like a little spaceman emoticon... (just use your imaginations ...) )

i LOVE the fact we're all so pro-internet... i mean... we are online, right? Sooo different to the discussions they have in newspapers / on tv panels etc. But i'm totally with you. I started to make some really close friends online last year... friends i feel closer to and that i know better than some of the people i know in real life. I love them and care about them soooo deeply. It's completely changed my life and i cannot imagine being without them now. I'm even going to meet one this year :D My sister get's really antsy about it and thinks it's really weird, but i don't see why. People have been having pen-friends for hundreds of years (don't ask me for proof, btw. i just know.) and to me this is just pen friends on a whole 'nother level! The friends i've made online are soooo important to me. I think there's a really important different meeting people in real life and meeting online. There's a level of anonymity at first that lets you be yourself without being as shy as normal or as awkward in public as normal (speaking for myself here...) For me, it's actually more honest, which means the friendships are more open and more relaxed... i talk about anything with my online friends, and i know i can. I think i'd die without the internet. Or at least go into a massive withdrawal and possibly never recover. @Raijen- good on you, and hope it goes well

" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" Yeah. That's what happens when i read those two little words if i've really loved the story and get really attached to the characters. But i wouldn't expect more after. The End is The End. Finito. Gone. No more. It's pretty final. I can cope with "the end". I'm with Cyhort- i'll do my own imagining of a later on if i want to. As long as you don't commit that terrible sin (well... i think so...) and end a really long gut wrenching story with a different two words : "The beginning". Ohhhhh then i'm really gonna chuck a wobbly.

I'm afraid this reminds me of that movie - "he's just not that into you" (Cheesy, i know. judge me if you like, i totally don't care ) - Where they talk about being the rule and not the exception, and people wanting to beleive they're the exception. That struck a chord. I beleive that circumstances under which cheating occurs are really really important for trust, forgiveness, the future of the relationship etc etc etc... but i think generally i wouldn't be able to trust that person again. I think i'd always be wondering. It'd just destroy something and i can't see how you'd rebuild it. It does depend so heavily on the reasons behind it though. There probably would be circumstances where i would be able to forgive something like that, but right now, i really can't imagine them.

I have a guy who comes to my work and hangs around and acts all creepy. Added to the very very rare creep i've come across online... I'd never recognise creepy in it's "normal" forms now. I'd think i was doing well and not realise about the creepiness until too late. yeah. Thanks, but I think i'll stick with paranoia and my stalker...

NOT lame at all!!!! Toy Story 3 was saaaaad! I haven't seen How to Tame your dragon yet, but i also cried in Lilo and Stitch, UP, and also i cry EVERY time i see the Lion King. Still. No matter HOW many times i watch it. I also cried in TMNT (that new version of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles). and Brother Bear. Saddest. Movie. EVer. I also used to cry in Milo & Otis when i was a kid. I'd probably cry again if i watched it now. But just becuase i know what they did to those animals now (Also- i could excuse seeing all these movies by telling you all i'm a babysitter... which i am. But really i just love kids movies. Hey- when else are you almost ALWAYS guarenteed of a happy ending?)

how'd you go? Any positive news coming back? Hope everythign works out ok.

Sucre - very true! and Tipdin, i would totally KILL for one of those phones! How cool!!!! if possible i would also like an old old car... maybe a Riley or a Morgan... (lol...) thing i find really weird, is when you see two friends together having coffee or just hanging out... and they're not talking, but are both on the phone to other people or are texting. It's kind of weird. Don't they want to be hanging out together? I'd be kind of offended if someone did that constantly while i was hanging out with them.... it's somehow both social, and anti social...

yaaaaay! Maria lovely- this is getting stranger and stranger though LOL. maybe we were separated at birth or something....

I like earth colours. pinks and reds make me uncomfortable (when i wear them), although, since i died my hair (Henna red) i actually feel ok in them. Green i love, but i feel most comfortable in blue or grey. i don't like pale colours. white, cream, pale yellow, tan... i feel all bleuk in them. I usually wear large amounts of deep / bright clashing colours. can't help myself. Or all grey and blue. Hmm... I read somewhere that Red is supposed to stimulate your appetite. Apparently that's why so many restaurants use it in their colour schemes. Yeah, call me a cynic.

I'm an emergnecies only sort of phone user. I'm the kind of person that has a cell phone (or, as we'd call it, a mobile phone (LOL!)) and never has it in the same room as them. I always get harrassed by friends and family for not answering the damn thing, but i never have it on me, and i always have it on silent. I'm better than i was though. In high school i'd turn it off and forget to turn it on again for days. Friends used to go insane about it! I was like- 'what's the big deal? i'll see you tomorrow at school anyway....' The only time i ever tried to text in class at uni i got caught. Soooo that was awkward.... havn't done it since. And i hate it when i'm on public transport or in the library and someone calls me. I get all short and just say 'yes' and 'no' a lot rather than conversing until the person hangs up. I hate the idea that people can listen into my conversations! Worst thing happened at Uni last semester though. In my favourite class (best subject, best lecturer... just FUN!) someone's phone rang. Not so unusual in itself. It happens. Normally, person with the phone rummages through their bag and turns the phone off... but THIS person, picked up the phone and answered! Lecturer's eyes nearly bugged out of his head, mouth fell open... and there was a collective "she did WHAT?" sort of gasp from the lecture theatre. Nearly caused a riot. Now i can look back and giggle... but at the time- Outrage! lol!!!

Dark- LOL if you remember, let me know!!! and HJ- wish i could do that. I think i'm a little paranoid. That's just gotta be it....

Dark- that's exactly what i'd like to happen! Lol, but my groups of friends seem to be very much made up of girls... and any guys who come tend to be boyfriends or some exs.... and clubbing etc also freaks me out. I think i'm much less of a social creature than i used to think i was. That's ok. I'm in noooo hurry at all. I think i'm too random and talk too much and most of them probably think i'm insane. Nevermind. I kinda like being insane.

HA i remembered something else i do when i write... If i re read an angry scene or an upset scene i've just written... sometimes i find myself making the faces or gestures to go with it. Angry faces or sad faces. Pointing fingers. The whole shebang. And even mouthing along. WOw. That must look really weird. Am i alone here? I mean, i figure i am.... but... you never know. .... right?

Instant celebrity! LOL and what a way to go!!! Legend! absolute legend!!!

Never had a partner, don't have a great job, don't really know what i want to do with my life or how the hell i'm ever going to be able to afford to live in this city (maybe i'll move to the country...)..... But i generally find i'm always happy. I don't know, i think it's important to live every moment, and get away from that all-too-human preoccupation with the past and the future. Living in the NOW and appreciating the little things is really important to happiness in my mind. Not stressing about anything you can't change, or anything that's not an immediate problem, not worrying about things that are in the past and can't be changed. I do think friends and family are important, love somewhere in your life, but i think self acceptance is more important. I think Bumblebee's right. It's hard to imagine other people loving you if you're not ok with yourself. Oh. And cupcakes.

random but true : Puff the magic dragon. Every. Single. Time. i hear it.

Totally illegal in Australia... but people still do it. Biggest offenders? Soccer mums in their SUVs who try to kill me on my way to work. my favourite way of getting back at them? slowing down as much as i can without seriously disrupting the traffic and then ignoring them when they flash / beep / harrass me. Of course, this only works if they're behind me. It's kind of fun. I get a massive adrenaline rush from it. Of course, someone is totally going to roadrage and kill me one day.... If they don't kill themslves first. you really kinda tapped into my pet hate here

I've been on... hm.... 2 dates? Should have been three but i was too thick to realise i was being set up with the guy. Lol. Hate dating. I don't want to have to dress up and try to impress someone or whatever. I'd much rather be myself and wear jeans and watch movies at home or something equally boring. Much more into the falling into something with a friend. Then again, never had a boyfriend etc either... Whole idea of dating just freaks me out. If i could just skip past the getting-to-know-you stage then i'd be fine!!

Humm, can't really say that i'm completely up with the Australian music scene... I'm currently rediscovering the 70s and 80s (or discovering for the first time, if you like, since i was born late 80s....) but i can tell you what's popular at the moment. I think. I mean, seriously... THINK..... Little Red just released their second album. It's a bit boring apart from one song called "rock it" "Plans" by Birds of Tokyo is massive here at the moment. Mumford and Sons still pretty popular, and if you like them you might like Whitley (one of my fave artists EVER! Not much of him on Youtube unfortunately... ) anyway. not sure what you'll think of those........