InTheMindOfSunshine

While that would have been a funny turn of events, I didn't tie the universe that tightly together. Haha.

I sensed this was going to be a hard question... Lincoln's the type of person who likes having power over people. (An example outside of Gabe would be Finn. Though it's never outright addressed, the identity of his previous, horrible, roommate was in fact Lincoln.) Gabe is sort of like a game to Lincoln. He's a bit obsessed with Gabe and originally expected Gabe to come crawling back to him within days of breaking up with him at the beginning of the story. Gabe doesn't because of the thrill of a new school year and new people, especially Henry. When Gabe didn't go back to him, Lincoln decided force put himself in Gabe's life instead. That's why he lobbied to move into Cameron House and why he went out of his way introduce Gabe to Ryan. Lincoln believes that he can still control Gabe. When Gabe stood up to him in defense of Auggie at the dinner in chapter eleven, Lincoln finally realized that he had lost his control. His last chance of controlling Gabe is by tearing him down again, by destroying any romaticized version of Henry Gabe may have possessed. It doesn't go as well as Lincoln would have hoped--by that, I mean Lincoln wanted Gabe to come back to him--he delieved the final blow: voicing the awful lie Gabe had been telling himself. So basically Lincoln wasn't at the house to convince Gabe to kill himself but rather to convince Gabe to choose him over Henry. The fact that this drove Gabe to suicide was an unexpected flaw in his plan. ...Hopefully I answered your question without too much confusion.

I toyed with the idea of killing Gabe off completely, especially during the early parts of the draft. Early on, it was supposed to be about how suicide affected those left behind. That's why I initially made Gabe so dependent upon Auggie and Kyra. Then I realized, as I mapped out the entire backstory of Henry, that I really didn't want to write it that way. So I promoted Declan to a bigger part and decided to, instead, let Jude's death serve as a tribute to my original plan. So, no, the story did not go how I originally planned it to go at all. When I finally decided for certain that I was not going to kill off Gabe, by that point I was already around chapter six, I the drew up a rough idea of the set-backs which he would face, namely Henry's questionable issue with the subject of suicide. Most of those ideas ended up becoming part of the story. So I always planned to put Gabe through hell, but I didn't always plan for him to survive. For the most part, I construct stories around a particular scene. For this story it was the opening scene. For Ground Rules, however, it was the umbrella scene in chapter eighteen, which was pretty much the beginning of that chapter. Borrowing Family was the same: it was contructed around chapter nine in the scene between Wes and Lachlan. There are exceptions to this, though. The Paradox Series was created from a general idea of bullying. The stories on which I am currently writing all stemmed from general ideas of various issues.

I'm glad you enjoyed the stories. As for Artie, there was a time when I seriously considered killing him off--either by the police or perhaps by Riley and Dexter during their final showdown. As I got deeper into the story, I realized that killing him off seemed to cheapen all that Spencer and Nix had suffered. Then when it came time to actually decide his fate, I decided to allow the justice system to deal with him. He was already too far gone psychologically that sentencing him to an normal prison sentence was nearly impossible. A mental facility really is the best place for him.

Thanks, Lisa! And thanks to Cia for chosing this story. I haven't actually looked at it in a long while, and it's a nice excuse to pull it out of the files collecting dust on my computer.

I'm glad that you're enjoying the story. As for Artie's fate... you'll just have to read and find out...

At one point during the previous story, I wrote up a character list. I believe it was around chapter nineteen of the Paradox of Friendship so it may be a little out of date, but here is the list I made then. It's a bit rudimentary, but it does lay out the major characters and then some.

If not for Trebs commenting on my forum, I might have missed this. Good thing I did not. I'm very surprised and very honored. Thanks, Joann, for taking the time to write the wonderful review. Honestly, I have no words to describe how much this made my day.

Thanks for telling me! Knowing my luck, I would have missed it.

Yes, once a week, though there might be a hitch that prevents me from posting every Saturday. If that happens, usually I post within the next couple of days.

Uziel: I'm glad that you are enjoying "The Paradox of Promises" even without reading the first story, though I imagine a few things might have been (or will be) confusing. As a writer, I have gotten to know these characters quite well so I hope you get to know them, too. Spencer is not weak, though he can come across as being so once in a while. I should have the next chapter posted Saturday(ish) so keep a lookout for it!

The sequel to "The Paradox of Friendship" has finally been written. Entitled "The Paradox of Promises", it follows the continuing story of Nix and Spencer. The two teenagers are left to deal with the repercussions left by the conclusion of the first story. This was never meant to be a stand alone piece but rather a continuation of Nix and Spencer's story. As with TPoF, this story is rated mature and contains scenes which are not for the faint of heart. Here you can discuss any aspect of the story that may not have been addressed in a review or you can ask any question regarding to the story. Link to the story: The Paradox of Promises

Thanks, Sean. The sequel is still in works, by the way. I hit a few set-backs and my college classes are a bit more work than I'd anticipated. I can't guarantee when it'll get posted, but it will. I can promise that.

The violence is an area I took liberties with. I realize in reality things would be different, but this is fiction, and there is a story to tell. The story isn't about the violence, but the violence does play a major part in the story. It's a catalyst for the remainder of the story. Could Kendall, Reese, Ember, and Parker have interfered? Probably. Why didn't they? This has been going on for roughly two years. Why haven't they stopped it before now? Because, as I said earlier, friendship means more to them than an outsider. In the beginning, Riley and Dexter were questioned for their actions, but eventually, it wasn't so surprising. Besides, what does Spencer mean to any of them? Nothing. He's an outsider. Why was the violence in the open instead of in private? Partly because Riley and Dexter wanted Spencer to pay for his past and partly because it highlights the atrocities of Spencer's daily life. It's to the extreme so that it is noticed. Of course any type of violence is noticeable, but I wanted to set up a contrast between Riley/Dexter and Artie, who, in my opinion, is the true antagonist of the story. Everything Artie does is behind-the-scenes (until the final part of the party at Dean's). He's friendly and seems to be everything Spencer wants in a friend, plus Artie's a packaged deal. If Spencer's friends with Artie, he's also friends with Zeke, Hagan, Dean, Liyah, and Trudy. But Spencer didn't know they were playing him. Everything was kept secret. Spencer only caught fragments of information at random times. They were careful to keep him in the dark. Riley and Dexter, on the other hand, were very open and straightforward. So maybe that puts the others--Kendall, Reese, Parker, and even Nix--in a position where they can and probably should stop them, but that's not the point of Riley and Dexter's form of violence. There are reasons the others don't step in, but it's not because they're evil or heartless or less than human. They're none of those things. They're as human as Spencer, which may seem like a far-fetched claim, but it's the truth. At the very least, Spencer knew Riley and Dexter hated him; he was never aware until it was too late how much Artie hated him. The fact that they (as in Nix and his friends) are willing to admit their failures and ask (if not beg in some instances) for forgiveness shows how human they are. Maybe they're not the best people in some cases, but they're fiercely loyal and the best people for Spencer to become friends with. (Oh, and through my experience, American high schools don't lack humanity as seen in the story. The other students standing around just served as another level of contrast against Artie.) So why does Spencer go back to class after each beating? In the "real" world, he wouldn't be able to, but this doesn't take place in the real world. It's fiction and the only way to truly understand this story is to accept the fact that it takes place in a warped sense of reality. The violence in this story isn't the first he's ever experienced. He's learned to categorize the pain and to ignore the majority of it. If Riley/Dexter see weakness, it's a vulnerability that Spencer can't afford--the same goes for being weak in front of Porter and his gang. It's a part of his life, and maybe, just maybe, being at school is better than being at home (referring to Chapter 26: Brothers, for example). I don't know if I've actually thanked you for your feedback, but I do appreciate it. It helps me see this story in a different light and is helping me to decide what needs to be clearer in the sequel or in future works. This story will probably never be rewritten. I may edit it for grammar or typos or to correct a couple of errors, but I will never do a complete overhaul. I'm satisfied with it overall, at least enough to have posted it here. So anyway, happy readings!

I was never angered by your previous post. I was a bit indignant but not angered. I purposefully strayed away from addressing the characters in my previous response, because I am reluctant to say much at this point. There is a sequel to this story (which I doubt you'll read). It's not posted yet so I'm extremely careful not to divulge too much information about the characters for fear that I will inadvertently give away parts of that plot. That is the last thing I want to do. So I'm not going to explain this in its entirety. Not because I don't have a response but because there's only so much I can say at the given moment. The story is told from Nix's point of view, and Nix is the protagonist, not Spencer. That means a LOT. It distorts the narration slightly so that the reader sees the majority--but not all--of the story through Nix's eyes. The fairest way to examine Nix's friends (Kendall, Parker, Reese, and even, at times, Ember) is to ignore the character of Spencer altogether. Other than a few technicalities and random instances, they have nothing to do with Spencer for the most part. They're a very exclusive group of people, and Spencer, it just so happens, is not among the exclusive group (at the beginning of the story). Besides, what do they owe Spencer? He's nothing to them--much like the throwaway characters of Jason Mallory or Anthony Johnson. So they don't stand up for for Spencer, but who does? No one. He's an outsider, and, because of his personality, a loner. So maybe they should stand up for Spencer, but that would require them to take a stand against their closest friends. Their inaction doesn't mean they agree with Riley and Dexter. It just means that Spencer isn't more important than their friendships. That's harsh, yes, but it's the truth. It's high school, and this is an area I deliberately exaggerated. They're teenagers. These may seem like broad excuses, but they're not mature adults. They're going to make mistakes and miscalculations. Separately, there is little I can say about Nix's friends at the moment, because this is a topic that appears frequently in the sequel. I'd rather leave a bit out of this response than give away the plot to the sequel. There are many things exaggerated in this story. It's fiction. I took the liberties that were necessary to tell this story. Yes, I realize there are moments of extreme bullying and violence, but that's just part of the story--part of Spencer's life. It's his reality, and it would be awful to sugar coat it. To understand not only the characters of Riley and Dexter (and Artie, if you're referring to the later scenes) but to also understand the character of Spencer, these scenes were necessary. I could have ended this story with the downfall of everyone who ever wronged Spencer, but what's the point in that? How would that make Spencer feel? What ending could have been plausibly better for Spencer? As an outsider, it is easy to think that something could have been different and better, but for Spencer, living in the moment, he got what he's always wanted: friends. It's not perfect, but life is far from perfect. There could never have been a truly fluffy ending for this story. I couldn't do that for myself or for the readers. How would you have felt if all of the characters had went through everything they did only for a pristine and too perfect happy ending? Probably robbed. This was a happy ending for Spencer and for the other characters, regardless of whether they deserved it or not. So do I think I've failed the characters? No. This was their reality, their warped reality at that. Are they evil? No. If they were evil, there would be no remorse. Some have cruel tendencies, but they're not inherently evil. I know I'm probably not being clear, because I'm not entirely sure how to explain the abstract concepts that are behind the characterizations and the conclusion of this story, especially with the limited information that I can talk about. When the sequel is posted and everything is out in the open (by the way, there is a bit that is left unfinished at the end of this story, including a few things that seems to be already wrapped up), then this will either be clearer or I can explain it better. Does it hurt my feelings that you are mad at me because of this story? No. That just means that you connected enough with the characters to be, at the very least, sympathetic towards them. I like the extreme characterizations of the eight main characters (yes, I include Spencer) because each serves a purpose. Nix, for example, is oblivious so that the reader doesn't know too much to begin with and so that the plot can develop accordingly. The characters aren't random; they each have their part to play in the story and they play it well. Questioning my humanity or trying to prick my conscious doesn't work. I won't change this story, because I firmly believe that there are some stories that should evoke the darker emotions--anger, hatred, etc. I like the darkness of this story, because it challenged me as a writer. Life is messy--maybe not always as messy as it was in this story--but it's not pretty.